我尊贵的邻居(11)

Justing

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6 q5 @+ w, r5 ^0 K井忘川
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6 @8 @3 R4 Q5 c我尊贵的邻居
是我们小区  几十户
唯一的元老
一住三十多年

# F4 n) ^( p, ~+ h邻居八十多了  却身轻如燕
白发红颜  不见皱纹
开车铲雪  挖土栽花
似不识  岁月为何物
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, P" |$ F  J6 _头顶英国文学硕士的光环
; ~1 ]2 w# T2 L- F$ D4 {邻居气宇轩昂
! P; @+ p8 d/ C" p) [如同女面朱熔基
  b6 p" q  A6 M1 S7 W# s/ y) |邻居的字
1 _) b$ I1 l- N0 }则遒劲似  老树裹枯藤

邻居酷喜中国文化
: E; w& Y% Z2 l6 k9 z2 E7 Y说她属土龙
其笛声也悠扬
  \# A7 s5 X0 p( \0 @那是从隔壁传来的
唯一的声响
那不知名的曲调
反复颂扬着  生命的壮美与灿烂

Justing

这首哪天有空好好翻译一下，写张贺卡送过去，顺便取取经。回帖备忘。

张玉

老人是宝啊

Justing

身轻如燕 与 不见皱纹 位置互换

Justing

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9 k9 i1 i9 a' J6 w英文版，欢迎指正：
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- ^; p* N6 g; n! b5 SLiving here for more than thirty years,
my prestigous neighbour
is the only first owner of the unit properties
" y% n" g5 q7 din our community ---
& ~! |0 s; W$ q& [. ?; Ftens of townhouse condos.
" {5 x! g  H+ w; N5 f* J/ [! @* s
! q9 H  H: g  P/ m+ p2 z. INeighbour is more than eighty years old,
magically, without wrinkles into your eyes.
She has white hairs and red faces.
# [6 d% u( l! N* K0 u9 b3 y) I3 |* M- eHer light-footed movement
9 P# [- k: \1 V+ j) X* z: }1 C& Pis just like a flying swallow.

& \3 t& i( s( V+ ^She shovels the snow on her door lane
before driving her own car;
she digs her back yard
: ^0 y9 L2 m  G) s/ Ato plant flowers ---
as if she did not know what years mean.

& G/ H5 Z! C0 HWith the glory of the Master's Degree in English literature,
3 |1 V# q( ^+ h" B$ Hneighbour has a dignified appearance ---
as if she were the female twin of Chinese Premier Rongji Zhu.
! n! l0 x  Q/ i& BNeighbour's handwriting
; b7 k4 s/ g* ~' D' _/ m, r* Gis so vigorous as to be the old trees
5 a9 n  k/ q1 x0 J; C5 \8 ginterwined by dry vines.
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3 ]& G7 p& V* `/ k6 VNeighbour loves Chinese culture deeply.
9 ?% x+ q# z, ]3 oShe said she belongs to the Earth Dragon.
Well, her fluting is very melodious ---
- Q! \$ P9 L, U: ythat is the sole sound going into my ears
from the next side of my wall;
the unknown tune is extolling
the magnificence and brilliance of the life,
again and again.

Justing

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土龙，1928年，与朱熔基同年，具体到月份，邻居也只比朱熔基小1个多月。

Justing

身轻如燕 与 不见皱纹 位置互换
Justing 发表于 2011-1-2 20:03

从音韵角度考虑，还是不换为宜。我写新诗，仿照古诗平仄的要求，比较注意语句缓（相当于平声）急（相当于仄声）的交错搭配，这是我的独到之处。
另外，翻译改动一处：
Her light-footed movement
1 p! z5 H3 w% tis just like a flying swallow.
! P# P8 y, Q/ a' p修改为：
/ |* t8 |' _: ], BHer light-footed movement
# c# k. v/ y3 j  d2 M  Kis just like a swallow flying.

hm86888

6# Justing


& V$ N* G/ |: I8 l# x" w- H. I9 J" [真的是太像朱镕基了！

Justing

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6# Justing
真的是太像朱镕基了！
hm86888 发表于 2011-1-4 23:35

我贴的就是朱熔基啊，邻居还不敢照。这个 镕 字我词库里居然没有。