 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
0 d9 S' @3 |* p* `: z! H( Z请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
) p R; c8 ^/ B7 H1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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- P* b1 a& J) ~/ Q1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it0 J- P3 c# f* |/ b0 v) ~
down.
+ x% ^% f) F( A& G! D) HWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
8 ?) c* z$ E& s3 \. ?5 }" P2 eyou
* N; U+ [5 h: U6 m+ L2 B- Y$ sleaving it down.2 Q% F, q, p1 J8 {
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？( f9 K" `' R& i& I# }
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.! L% I+ J- ]* A/ P/ C
Let it be.
' [ i1 G5 u' m4 F. n8 a" F/ c1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去' `8 L" Y9 g2 V! @; O6 A% x/ V. r7 a
+ {( K& w* E! E4 H- w1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it' _; b( ]+ @9 [& {; @
that way.
- a `% f' L' _, Y8 W8 T. V1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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7 N! i' P7 y3 X) _, {1. Crying is blackmail.
& q0 \0 R. l2 b2 i1，哭泣是敲诈
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8 {+ K1 S N2 D( p- p1 i( y7 K1. Ask for what you want./ S! D" b" y4 P h, J: q2 B
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!# T4 r& r+ Z" r7 G5 {, [8 O
Strong hints do not work!9 ?+ E; m( a- s! n$ X
Obvious hints do not work!
$ n/ {+ t) a, k' T2 zJust say it!
. [' y3 A$ \ m3 z1，你想要什么就说8 n1 w0 t' ~6 {' \# x' C
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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( n! O ]" b: d- I0 F7 O# l1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
2 D$ F/ d7 X2 xquestion., I& ] h" d, `4 E$ S o) _
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）% B9 B- ?# f+ X: s8 N
6 [; z8 g* i$ _! j1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
. P' ~1 s- `6 Hwhat we do.; b% P/ A( r& J# o4 R
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.: g$ y! r/ ?- K& z) w: w
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。0 t3 p4 M y2 B# j7 B) }( w$ O6 @
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
^+ g; {$ S% d( K7 }1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去( y e' v" ]- u6 X3 _% x2 {
/ u1 @3 i& r8 i/ |) w1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.' C9 |: h6 O' e) G! {& V
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days." m3 e9 ?" m& F, T3 y- c* [6 ~
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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* t4 l! ?3 q5 w8 {3 G" _1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us" M/ C" e/ e) y: o
to act like soap opera guys.5 ^7 S1 n& R# {/ m; m
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.& ]- p5 p+ s u1 |
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们) A' |% Z" ~4 G2 z1 a6 C( J
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways" n) [0 o! q7 b5 R* O9 {2 T% Z( T
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.$ L# K7 B% u1 }; [7 t5 p' I
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。5 Y8 m+ j% B) H7 i) R# S5 k6 W
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）8 d+ q4 W8 g1 j
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it2 V7 b* W& t' i
done. Not both.' N. q3 u5 A, i* d7 ?' R
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during0 t' ]/ f9 H! @) z
commercials.3 z( m* b# {+ A* R& J s9 k0 w
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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5 b' T' c* j! t1 c( O1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.) K0 v( A& r& m1 A' J3 R1 M. C
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.& s; H$ l" e L0 ^& f- m1 C' U
We have no idea what mauve is.& T: E+ Y* k) `- L/ F( h2 Y
0 |8 h2 `" A+ e& {1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
& C0 Y4 ?2 M6 S% tnothing's wrong.' ~( r& k g( R9 @0 R" }
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer3 k5 K! N, T6 ~! O }
you don't want to hear.
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' U2 D8 N4 b" e* W# c: a2 {1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
. s6 y' F& `( s) c3 @fine...Really.
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+ Q- j+ R0 P$ A$ ` b1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
( c% ^+ w4 ~- S8 |0 ?discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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: R& J' k- T# X) k1. You have enough clothes.
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1. You have too many shoes.8 O2 q; F9 d5 Q5 H J* T- t4 v* Q
7 B) Z/ f9 Y% g$ @) ?( ?( L- A1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!( L5 _& f% {" S T5 w* e
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1. Thank you for reading this.( u6 W/ t$ E/ y A0 x( }
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;' b+ S( g6 Y3 j
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.& f8 B2 {% L" L+ s
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
