 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
% \* m ?# V2 s' A, z8 _请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写1 T1 g! [( q8 X5 ]# k0 {
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
+ |2 o! v/ h7 @8 \, X* I1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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p, |! c( P9 F( O- c$ l k7 Q1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
: O- Y' @: ~5 _& a0 \1 V1 mdown.' R1 _; X+ `& L1 g; ^
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
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leaving it down.
7 w, O! j8 k( h8 b8 M1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？' d* C' d, E% h2 ^! ?2 R
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
$ U% a0 W9 ~! f. \# @8 \Let it be." i6 x* L; r( F% u& b
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
; `. W+ m: |- U* A }$ vthat way. U+ _. K1 w) g. O
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail./ ?! z* J4 h6 y- X5 B: P
1，哭泣是敲诈1 A& g; ]7 s: w3 \8 X2 f% a
7 o8 O5 b' K% K, e7 l1 }1. Ask for what you want.1 p+ n0 b; R6 N/ A
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
7 Y0 I N3 M: p/ J4 _1 g1 w! wStrong hints do not work!/ i9 r9 \ F. X% q. |
Obvious hints do not work!9 t+ U' U2 ~7 m2 w1 R( T" \- h
Just say it!
9 K, b% U4 x1 Q* I1，你想要什么就说! A2 b' @" m) P3 ^$ n+ X, A* k
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！4 R% M3 l; [1 ^4 R, A
$ c0 F+ M2 z$ E# I$ l/ i# Y% h2 ]1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every ' C2 d2 V& _, }5 `* n
question.! @" _) C1 h, n' [0 R& m
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's; k' |0 Z. @( H+ @& F
what we do.
S3 ?/ P! \$ i4 ?' W4 E/ lSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
5 e Z% h _3 o- F' h1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。4 a, m; k+ U8 y' d6 u
0 V7 z9 P& T% j1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor." Q5 G9 v. ^" h
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
1 }) P+ L, f0 n" z7 {, k2 _In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days." M. A: Z! z, ~: d4 V. G
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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6 g& S3 I, v F' B5 t3 z/ w% ^4 @/ ^9 C1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us1 @4 B( N$ ~. f! [! m
to act like soap opera guys.% q( G0 z' b" K7 z b; |
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们" P3 V8 m3 g0 E3 u$ z4 b( [
1 o) b5 t8 i9 a, l! q+ ^1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.* b% T d& T% I9 n' L) D2 m
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们$ X5 ?9 b3 u. Q5 u& O
+ S7 P* |3 z! a w1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways8 x/ T: i" i) h
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
0 r4 n& B8 b# r# u; m! e2 I2 i1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。' S, g& H+ ]4 ]3 ~) R/ c
7 \" u) d: f. x! X& g9 Q（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）) L" b5 O2 c/ I/ T e% K+ A
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
& e( h4 W* M& T4 hdone. Not both.
. _' T# X+ z& O$ ]+ WIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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- [* n8 s7 w0 Y$ x* e7 G1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during- C3 \8 s. A7 v* y9 I7 Y; x1 B
commercials.
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% x" f# k) ?0 V! s ^1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.. ?1 d* S. I( C' j s! E4 i0 V1 I; d
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
6 N: w* n1 z; YPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit." O R; n+ C0 b9 r9 _
We have no idea what mauve is.; t/ d. E# {, x }/ R, I
5 h" R# e7 H A! g- \1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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( f6 B3 i7 o" I* G( _) n, k1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like: Z6 }4 z- O; t6 @
nothing's wrong.( G/ ` g4 d( G
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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' G) s0 K3 P0 p& F! S" n* l, Q1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer# I$ f( l) U( O/ a- h: B4 `
you don't want to hear." n( K' e' B# v3 l# J7 h4 U: k
$ A+ g' i3 V u0 r! C; E1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is0 D" B. w: n* v M, c! W9 a( @9 w: X
fine...Really.
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6 `4 m# m# x* A& u1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
' _+ x U# d; T% V' M; udiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.& T- |0 W; m/ ~& x0 o$ Q) b# p
) g; A- F$ k" ~! Z; I1. You have too many shoes.5 h9 f+ r& K* Y! ?$ x
1 ^$ Y0 `- c; `9 h) D( I2 J1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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3 X# ]/ S' @' n$ `1 P5 J1. Thank you for reading this.
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- {, P% r9 x( z8 {6 rYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;+ z8 V* D5 g+ z: Z5 v
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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! W1 l, ~' N) tPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.. s' ?9 L; o2 U8 d) ]% a) L
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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