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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:5 L& L8 U1 W" g, ^7 }. k: z: Q; G
& b# V6 O8 n& |0 ^1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush( n! ?- v) d! g' p
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
/ Z7 k' ?2 E! n5 omorning.! k0 u7 C6 {1 q$ `" N
5 h0 C( J1 {, \1 g* a3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,: f+ J! C' p, F2 N
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
$ x, R0 h; b% ~: k5 b& _landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.* U4 \# `7 H/ T! ]( p$ e3 M7 C
3 ^% C3 f- Y; s9 [( o8 @4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its0 [$ x3 E, ]3 x
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
2 l: D1 [. ^* ~muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
. R% p# O, [) C) W3 E" ~ h/ Lgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell5 D( e; H7 p _7 \. I
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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! }. t( e6 _5 }( s' C) s5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
* Z0 |* \+ X2 |! O" jcussed out, and possibly shot.6 m8 {- V7 G. @2 n& A; W7 R
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can3 [6 }: w, e b7 v( `7 G5 N: F% [8 G
get you shot.7 K8 X$ M; M* w+ A5 t4 F( ]- X! S
0 r: O+ T) k% q- {4 y: }" z* K7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that( g; p8 w. q9 I* R0 I* J/ M* f
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
& o L& p2 c7 F$ t3 c5 q4 B7 U7 Gthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
4 i% E5 F# c: |' `) wyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
; h* D X( i& Z! Gvehicle through the intersection.
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- r* J, k# K$ ?$ s' c+ v$ D! g" p- c8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour: f4 F, T2 `$ k
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next& }/ P$ _5 t& t" }- t
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
+ j- |# H, q0 smore construction starts everyday.9 D. c8 D% k) H% ]
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,8 R; y$ \/ ?) s( ~4 v3 v& _4 Z0 w6 L
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
7 N# H& v4 [# \( j+ ]( v. B" n0 nsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.( o2 d3 G8 Z5 o$ g H: M* a
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
& ?4 }, b' C' Y E" p) c9 l) Broad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye* B, \' e+ G/ s; S p4 j
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and4 H: c/ z$ ] _- r
66 Street are also the same road; got it?1 I9 z) @9 t" X" \7 w/ A
9 F; `) i1 }/ b# e6 z: h11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
2 `5 l. V1 J0 e3 {$ @9 V# vshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally$ r1 b" A" B% K) W3 Z7 d; g
Activated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
. h% F# y6 r$ `1 J4 f0 Z' Ryou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
5 P+ a" r7 h7 l' d4 B7 l; v# I6 baccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
7 V1 X" s$ u" C/ g% ^lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and7 {, z; c( u% g, d+ `( r6 P
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
