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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will, N3 ~% |* P; e5 J
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
, W5 o2 G" U, r* N! w- dthe other possibility." |. b1 w5 l# T3 O$ v7 E9 D
2 V5 d$ U$ w, v% f4 S9 a& LAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
' g8 a! H( K6 N2 Q- |7 yspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
+ q- K7 B" p$ @5 \! rplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".# v6 y+ v) Y) s
# h0 p8 f2 z: `& i# HIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
7 j. O& s0 s5 g1 W" L& o: K1 x3 {6 ^: wthe sivil servants jump with joy.0 f6 n9 \% S# K7 z* w7 f
$ R: z& j. m/ D/ _) z- I3 b# i) yThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
8 O7 J; b) Q+ g0 d% _2 Kkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.' m/ j+ Z- N/ r0 E; S1 `6 P
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
- L* ?* z9 O9 L0 O2 J, Ztroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
7 ?% V; b0 f" l4 Z' @3 rfotograf 20% shorter.. q+ y' q0 i) @
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
: Q0 y) D( ~$ P5 N4 L" Hreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
$ p) A }* [+ Z2 a; V' fben a deterent to akurate speling.8 k/ A& ?+ a3 X" w* s- e6 N
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
; G4 u9 b2 p+ o3 B7 b7 qdisgrasful and it should go away.5 ?/ L# _5 t, n' r
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with, K4 L _; r: z+ H9 k6 k
"z" and "w" with "v".
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9 E& M: S# `# T vDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and) Z3 O( n; x: Z7 \3 U
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.9 i& r) h9 F5 h4 a ~) |& W; N0 z! U
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu# w/ e9 X' Q, u5 b0 S( b6 \
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.6 W W; O) Z: k+ G9 P4 l
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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