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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will E5 q7 p- l- x8 d
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
. \& S$ O: m# g# e; q/ wthe other possibility.
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1 N5 t. i" j% @& s5 {As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
0 E, o, U' M4 }; Z" }spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
) A: m, x0 O- j2 ]: iplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".+ ^, M5 |6 N. S- @4 R/ P
" q% m; x6 [) n% G) cIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make0 d3 L/ c0 u; s( S5 ?' Q) D
the sivil servants jump with joy.9 e% r7 G( r' [" K( w
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
2 i. x6 |, O6 u0 xkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.' Y& }8 k% D! X) _
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the4 e# m( c3 e F8 @! `) L
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like2 p, N3 `% N1 {( O1 o
fotograf 20% shorter.. F; y+ h. J$ ]
: I/ v8 {2 `) ~6 V3 `& d3 zIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
9 C- A+ ^; w; u9 qreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.5 ?/ R) {# _" k* |
4 x7 b+ c# b, wGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always) E" e) {$ O, p' s2 y) h
ben a deterent to akurate speling.6 F0 W+ f9 |$ K% n. z% U; ]( I% y( F
O& j; k, _6 ?& X2 nAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is5 t2 \) a! }' a- a% f n0 S
disgrasful and it should go away.) |6 R3 r( I) b) y6 J3 G, B
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with# o6 x E0 Y5 p0 X8 J* H1 U
"z" and "w" with "v".* B- ^$ i4 D# a) N( [9 h* w+ X8 l
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and9 @9 v% g+ F" R9 h$ H
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
: Z. _3 R$ Q/ M* H* _9 B8 }( eunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
. ?, n! p3 \3 e8 D3 wUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze4 H3 o: E0 x3 m1 e: H; }) j
forst plas.
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" J0 I0 t9 x$ a1 ]& G; SIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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