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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
7 X0 j) n3 o8 i9 B* jbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was; T# f$ g* h1 f
the other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
% q0 v, N0 N- X; c0 `spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
$ U) q" S" O- G2 k) j+ dplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
$ G6 w4 [: `+ C2 Hthe sivil servants jump with joy.6 K+ {2 w& D$ K2 @
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up( M5 i$ ~' ]5 P- T) M* \; h
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.$ q0 U5 q3 Y! ~; X! T6 ~
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the% k( p$ I2 s [) q& V: c. M
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like- d* T( r6 F; u: K; Q
fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to% ], d J y6 P' K
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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- n" X1 n: R! A0 DGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
) B! d9 `& C) Rben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is1 V! a( W4 C/ C/ M% K# u+ W
disgrasful and it should go away.
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6 W0 s0 O; l1 }By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
2 j4 o F! A. D3 [% d"z" and "w" with "v".7 K, v# O- ]; i, X+ t- S
( x' ]5 D9 G4 R/ }During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and% f# [: K _5 T1 }) r% R
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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- G% K1 j' T3 |* J3 s3 bZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu- O4 _( C0 S% `5 J+ P
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
. F4 U* ~3 t: O5 }# {Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze# ~( {9 o+ f) {
forst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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