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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
4 I0 c+ \' H2 |: f& fbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was; {& c3 C% x- G# D8 M2 @( r
the other possibility.) |6 g& ?( d8 |
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English: L" Y1 l+ n3 R$ a" U
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in" [0 L% @% H1 U" A: G, W
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish". ~# I2 A0 H2 `
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
3 ?: _& S. j0 b8 s2 V+ J0 ?the sivil servants jump with joy.! ]. e: \. u8 m' Q/ M/ w3 B
% I% p/ ^0 X; f. E' N9 w ]6 e4 |The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
1 ]# }6 i9 w# `3 l7 H9 Xkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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. f0 i8 [5 p( {8 C+ DThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the: u( `* P" z B( O4 b) A7 W
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
: l; p( A$ s0 ^0 x* B! mfotograf 20% shorter.7 O: T4 O7 D3 _7 t( h8 {0 o5 P
% K& `5 A: r) k ]
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
7 h9 l" N9 a1 G6 H N5 b' Ereach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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" S3 b3 p+ D) O6 }: Z. fGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
. T- |- z% l, K! E6 n" Nben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is1 R1 E H9 q, n
disgrasful and it should go away./ A6 C8 X( B1 S1 n1 k
. x0 S8 q6 B, PBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
4 x: j# L4 [5 b"z" and "w" with "v".
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& q8 \, m% g# ]1 V; SDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and' ?( U6 q; g9 M8 u
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu# O0 i8 ]/ r d3 |" Q; M- b
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
- l- l8 J v1 y$ l/ {( k" Q1 EUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
8 Z' l8 I1 _' E- D6 M/ s; xforst plas.
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2 n+ H+ _) o4 y, ^, x. U* [- pIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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