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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will% ?7 {$ Z. V( Q% T) B2 B) |( f
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
7 N6 M+ U5 _5 b- c9 W- B2 |" j' ethe other possibility.' k! s: b" W5 b6 a
q+ @6 } l h+ }/ q) h2 N* yAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
# o# [1 D4 B/ D& Q* N5 p" fspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
+ ?) U) @/ P0 s5 f# m0 dplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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9 t5 X& E0 K- U! vIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
% c6 a d- |7 z! m5 F! N! i" Y4 d3 b- dthe sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
' Y. T3 B% b# i2 Fkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
( a" A7 k& Q) s( R: l* z
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the2 W* D, q! X3 ^& `* q+ A
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
& T+ @8 _1 v B! n: U! j* S) Sfotograf 20% shorter.* p, \4 Q s: {( F" C
! {# V" j9 r3 l: T! H$ M- iIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to9 O$ L' _: x z- U2 p
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible., U. J8 U6 W3 ?
: \& U2 t! Y0 \5 v" \Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
1 j) s' T/ }, X9 lben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is4 H' [; n% x" M: a- x% u
disgrasful and it should go away.% r$ V" L" L* ^$ H1 |
( x* U1 }0 }& m- b5 ?0 B) EBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with5 k' _4 W( k( T9 c* S
"z" and "w" with "v".
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/ D, b1 o1 T$ IDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and# K) ?; c' B' b
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu5 S. P# ^. b; i9 ^8 O, F
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
! E5 e7 v' z3 T/ l+ \5 h; O5 H! QUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze" a5 m) e; ~- _# Y& C, ]4 w- W7 o
forst plas./ L5 j3 T: X6 z1 {6 j' B
; g$ { g3 b. d) ~* D/ v9 K( @8 UIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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