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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will, S% J t }2 E: b
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was, t% y2 R# d4 K l" `8 r; ^+ r
the other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
: D; y9 m* Q! M! S+ z: Pspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in+ H0 {$ c' `- x! R
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
$ J& M; ?5 S/ [& r$ r2 w7 r1 k- G1 G [the sivil servants jump with joy.. B0 Y6 b$ } `/ o2 x& s- O
+ @$ G! D% A x* z0 K" d6 bThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
; m* S$ ?* H2 [" G, H5 ekonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
( c* b8 v7 M" h1 x) k& I. G' H8 G. h" w. q
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
3 c6 ^0 X) R$ ftroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
% i z( {$ m3 M% sfotograf 20% shorter.
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8 `& ~, m+ B; K1 PIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to4 Y5 H1 f" Q6 k9 W4 S6 Q
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.: M( H4 C+ [, O, b' t0 \' G! l7 C
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
: B0 c& Q3 G P0 I- p) I/ Tben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
& {* a) z- }5 r. Q5 i! q9 H3 @5 tdisgrasful and it should go away.# t4 }/ Y% |2 E: o; H! J
% d2 U# ~2 C# C$ Y( |By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
$ Z3 _0 y f+ W"z" and "w" with "v"./ G' O. a# O& }
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and. p0 a& e' d0 I7 i* u' E$ j
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.. S- o: s% E H: C2 u; e
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
& k2 M# t) |6 C+ n! E! C; r6 Junderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
, w) Y% M! ^/ p) pUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze# Z$ @% q4 ^- l
forst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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