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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will5 _9 G) u! }3 p
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
& g8 `. Z+ \9 g( W% `the other possibility.
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+ p& R! H" t4 a" SAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English' d' ?" @, R3 s. s' h- G6 g1 S) Q
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in6 C/ F; [7 B: L) J' N" D
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".# s! ^* }2 _* i U& X
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make# C( S; D6 ` c
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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8 `# e- j0 \3 L& p; `( B0 bThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
* U( `3 t% y9 Z& N z1 w* L0 p0 zkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.) E7 W* s! p5 t! O9 R, V1 R. K1 I
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the6 i, ?4 T! ^ R' }6 ~
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like' x+ e5 ^& H p, J0 g2 q
fotograf 20% shorter.4 C' p& n, _2 J
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
R0 l/ _" E" t* l( Yreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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1 t* f# g- w2 Y+ n. H6 J4 q1 sGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
# v1 s: i J" s g) E! z0 Y7 ?ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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0 N0 x8 E4 ]% ], CAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
5 o1 z; F& `) F# J! ndisgrasful and it should go away.( A$ c( g" B: P/ p) ~
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and7 C. a# F" I g9 ]+ X0 B( G
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu l" @( \. S/ K: E0 U
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.8 f# F/ i" F6 I# h9 T) c" u4 h
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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