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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will2 s" V* Q# E* r6 B4 P& q) @. \
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
6 i5 [, t( d' w6 q- \" ]0 B7 x5 kthe other possibility.6 r x' o) D& B/ K! G0 k5 H# e
1 c) k0 i' I9 D/ ?! U3 n2 jAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
3 F1 w6 [+ R: P% h7 C/ P& fspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
0 {' S& j5 c, Y/ _7 cplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
2 a* o4 x. s2 a* ^" hthe sivil servants jump with joy." w4 f9 B" n9 e6 L _7 x% r1 k
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
) M0 i- Z# d& z) ]% ukonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
5 t$ d3 `( F! P$ h# r$ g1 O: H. D1 {troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
( l8 j- B* c0 b, g2 ffotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to8 c$ E% \: t+ v$ p6 Y, k: p
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
3 h: J8 _% ~' t$ g( x: g7 Z- oben a deterent to akurate speling.' Z2 J) j- v0 ^/ ?* r# N
8 d6 [& y9 Y# [) B# CAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
& k5 @( D; R. U" l& Hdisgrasful and it should go away./ ^$ F3 u- c9 q8 ?9 @5 |
" M: R" L! b O1 q" XBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with' c* ^' L. p+ X) r% y; q% Q
"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and, N& U2 ~9 V, ] C; k
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
! N1 Y% Q$ Z- t' P" T1 d. |understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.; m L9 p) ~+ d: m5 h; p
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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