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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will t7 I$ c& `, Z4 D1 N5 o! j
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
0 d$ W; c3 b* `' p. G! ythe other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English' }+ `; C8 ~' f( w1 e0 L& z
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in/ [& V' P, S0 |
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".& h3 k# f' q" C5 w
* M7 o2 m9 k/ b# X; C$ qIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make9 J. h) `" D2 S
the sivil servants jump with joy.& e: _. s; U8 @5 l- _: s
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up5 G4 N7 U' y" w* w3 h( G
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the1 x, Q, @2 C3 g5 i
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
! c1 ^# M& D* ?" J, I" I+ [/ R1 \fotograf 20% shorter.+ b; G% Z' ~: f6 n' Y% B0 R3 n
7 ~" M6 I1 b# O4 j E! S2 f* wIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to3 A) |9 r' P& M, @
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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# A, i# l: C: N2 b2 z: F! rGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
' V; R; h& A6 _2 A2 m2 P7 yben a deterent to akurate speling.
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x0 y% Y* G V( \- O& M/ N1 kAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
: w! e Q! \2 X# w- k6 I- `disgrasful and it should go away.
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6 _- V0 S; b# d/ PBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with! s9 d1 H5 s) g" U5 c
"z" and "w" with "v".7 d+ H% l. V1 ?
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and% N0 H. ?0 L/ K3 m: ]% |
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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' g* d6 L- z2 k; b* ZZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
4 n' w% N2 \6 _' Punderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
- b: _' `% L* a9 @Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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( s+ }" t, Y4 q( n2 r3 aIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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