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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will! r, Y3 X$ o, B4 V) m* D1 v
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
6 P* l. ~) u8 Q/ W# f9 X9 q _the other possibility.9 j% `; H1 y# W* z) j
1 Q- Q7 m/ o8 ^! z$ cAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
. O6 j6 C' M3 f" Q1 F$ I7 Nspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in ` m; L4 b& {2 ~$ W `/ `2 H" M: s
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
' L& }0 B% L9 B0 Wthe sivil servants jump with joy.
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9 D7 s7 b8 V9 {5 Y" q! O9 h5 LThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
$ o k1 i( R2 _$ I8 f& |konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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- ]/ u3 a( u, N8 i# v9 n: AThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
% j# ] }4 V; S0 ntroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
* t- N: {0 Q" ?9 p& j9 I' o- }1 j& Vfotograf 20% shorter.
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: Y( \* I3 c6 [- vIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to/ T% L" E8 G& a1 _
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible." L4 W+ r) A X" x# O0 p0 U
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always& X6 t9 ? q; f" A M
ben a deterent to akurate speling.& A# ]# F& |# H3 v: P7 _
7 ~* j s, w0 R7 r% x$ NAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is5 C3 v- p5 f# e, n: T, t6 B
disgrasful and it should go away.
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2 J, L2 P r- [) [9 u1 DBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with+ T/ k; P, q/ e/ l* b: i* x
"z" and "w" with "v".
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. y5 Q1 @0 C6 {' M# vDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and# x% `4 ] v. H! d
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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: ?: B' q2 H+ [/ I! |* h0 `Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
2 ~; B0 z6 k+ c m$ m8 P* Bunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.1 ^3 a1 J' ~4 r; S+ V5 O2 E
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze& M9 G5 B, T& p' k0 l
forst plas.+ h5 O2 c+ q5 a5 k: F1 @8 T
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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