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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will' X' q: h9 k1 I7 o
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
' g: a" P7 l1 @/ _, hthe other possibility." u$ y4 u* L+ N2 s' y+ D/ |
& E i* u! O4 z. Q0 bAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
$ w4 {: `+ W( p* k5 e/ t; K* zspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in7 }/ G: j1 }( Y# @! i1 i
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
- W* O" P/ Q0 X E6 Athe sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up1 p! H) ^1 q) b/ E S5 V4 n3 H
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter." z, x# r; ^8 z$ b% Y) _
' s K- Z. o3 D( E- b6 ~
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
' S2 C8 J+ c, o/ Q' p" F8 v$ e2 S; V1 Itroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
! x- |2 U0 o) l+ Q) n+ K* Ifotograf 20% shorter.
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2 d# g7 `# e. O8 l. e( i+ Y- J, AIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
0 m& r6 f6 ]" Y( Nreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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% g9 ^8 c; ^% V1 y. ZGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always( K2 C* Z2 ?& a7 G8 R9 K) F& m6 {
ben a deterent to akurate speling.& p( ]) V1 X8 L6 [+ e
) ^4 s* w( G: U6 vAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
- T0 i* c! e; P% odisgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
7 r2 F( z5 X# W% \8 v"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
5 ?; A- u" _( Y; `4 Vafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.2 f4 h. C! V& ~" T0 q! ^% p. S
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
5 O5 H1 @! z9 T: j* tunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.# l6 O" W" k) a5 w
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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9 W7 J* v) j$ F* f3 LIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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