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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will7 d; Z ^3 }0 H( R2 B
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
" `, R: ~" V, x' Y( z+ ethe other possibility.: l+ x" G2 h8 S# t' @5 y+ t2 }
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
' E0 s* b1 o' N" R/ Dspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
8 [: f8 O$ F2 Yplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make2 ^. ]" |& g3 \5 W4 X. W; U
the sivil servants jump with joy.9 Q1 }# I# i" O. V! a4 _
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up2 O8 A4 T i. M) E2 \7 U
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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- R/ p# E2 B) Y% M5 @. TThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the, z1 R* j1 f+ _4 @
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like* L0 D1 x8 ?5 Q
fotograf 20% shorter.' ]9 _% o$ P2 {- Y1 y
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
( e: i4 R3 g" A, G6 e7 vreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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& y4 |5 ~* b% tGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always H- B1 S- a2 q2 x
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
0 P7 n5 o" p/ F& d; Y7 X. |disgrasful and it should go away.
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5 T. _3 ~! Y7 x u# {) j* b3 w8 G- JBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with* z5 z4 V: H. Y" r$ L
"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and, [ T6 V! C4 s
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.3 a( H6 J1 N3 e A1 T: {# g
* b5 y" i$ C, J- E: BZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
+ g1 Z( d1 O$ Ounderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.5 H1 a+ i3 k. g) @* n
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze l1 I$ l7 f2 l" _, x
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' r/ [9 W2 Y1 Z! rIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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