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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will: \# z$ X U. T. j$ _
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
$ ~* u2 N" i# _5 _: Lthe other possibility.1 k% Z2 P; |2 n
- x; J- ~4 k0 W/ C/ CAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English+ U$ O7 a& g; P# _$ u
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in9 o4 N/ }: z4 S' l" Q- h
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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3 B" ]8 K" ]7 o" M& @In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make+ M; B& v& G3 G2 u1 d! F' r
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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5 |$ q2 [" o( q" n7 ~The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
; t$ Y# G* k |7 nkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
4 T, D0 V2 W7 d2 G5 X8 C6 utroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
% w5 v. g$ ~6 n1 B6 N. Wfotograf 20% shorter.1 W; G4 B& E( X9 F( q
3 E* S0 [& }# j' gIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
/ S' G' H( E: A; D; U/ m( {/ xreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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. R0 a; S/ X9 k9 m5 a" }Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always c# T# h9 s7 l! k
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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: x1 a( N) _5 Y* s5 \Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
. Y n5 ~1 u3 l' W# K$ e# edisgrasful and it should go away.
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7 J9 E' b4 e' F% y6 V/ f! mBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with# W8 C, C6 y6 H8 {, m' \
"z" and "w" with "v".
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4 a/ \. D; p6 hDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
" E7 @; g+ d4 g/ a/ b1 {! O7 M# |after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. g! d8 Y8 H% M: V6 b6 f6 W
" R8 F% c8 ]: }* i- GZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu V! ^4 N4 k4 x
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
- F. u0 l. [1 y* t1 ]. _; g1 K. RUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze5 G, ?# _) s; y' M. m* B8 ]+ N
forst plas.
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6 U1 Z3 m4 S% P- QIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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