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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will! b* r5 o, W/ N2 p, P) g/ B
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was+ F2 b' L# Z9 } _
the other possibility. [. g. O$ O' N; e, Y& ^9 u
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
* {- J9 R6 b+ Q- W. C9 H: ^spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in' {) O0 R! Y3 i* \' g
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".! R4 }4 L" e2 M7 O2 F2 M
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
$ G% B5 x1 \( x/ jthe sivil servants jump with joy.2 X5 S$ ^. Y3 n
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up& m1 f4 ?5 o% w# k b1 i
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
# R; ]0 G. ?$ n7 t% i" k: d! _1 ~( k
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
; W/ \4 o8 y: c# h7 L# Y2 wtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like% d: a2 H! n/ [9 T n
fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
8 h+ l) ]- u" x8 Z3 A/ {) f1 ?7 nreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.& \; M0 y; N$ `& q
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always* b& x h2 }$ s5 S( O M
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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e- Q2 o. e1 ^- }& ^$ @Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
) f3 n3 J6 j; r) C) J) l: R- zdisgrasful and it should go away./ f" {2 e" e/ P0 Q2 i" Y4 F A5 W
' q6 `' [5 c0 x" ~By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with& i: y1 ]5 k* Y& c1 ?& ?0 s, ~
"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
" |3 q+ f7 \" I2 \9 V2 u+ O- kafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu& k! n _/ z# y1 q
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
r9 H- `0 m. J7 _Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze/ T7 |' w& n" L0 d. l
forst plas.
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( A) {6 F2 w* Q3 l% v6 x$ }0 I" CIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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