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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will+ A. e4 ]5 U4 f8 p- w# p2 X1 L0 }$ y
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was$ x& m. V, ]$ U! U0 A! d
the other possibility.7 H$ U; B9 J, l3 E* |6 ^6 F# u
! t' g- T" a- p- h: |. f: z- qAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
5 A9 B6 C/ v$ ispelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in* A0 q2 L4 B6 u$ }) j( Y
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".3 Z" M0 U) {. A% u; d E
. \4 r# C. G3 d% |In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
. {3 S' v/ o7 ~ |+ U1 j+ n! [the sivil servants jump with joy.
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0 F% n4 n/ \, L6 n7 RThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
2 Z) a7 R: X" k1 C9 ?( R" q9 P! y3 ekonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the% X* Y) e: K: W5 D! k
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
# J$ C' L- n0 b4 A& ~fotograf 20% shorter.* B+ M3 X% [" {) b; L: M
( C4 M" G3 B1 G- Q3 Z6 H) g# mIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to2 V4 A0 C7 |% u: m
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.0 f5 s0 }0 r: _2 Y2 a6 n v+ ^& t% U' g
( E# v7 X( H1 ?3 ]& G- aGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always5 k3 @/ T: d+ l) L" ~5 ]1 U
ben a deterent to akurate speling.: H$ U) j4 o; v. q1 D6 c T
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is! F5 ]% z! ?; V* t' x/ D0 d8 Z& J
disgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with% O, P0 |* d4 |% ]
"z" and "w" with "v".
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1 x* e1 t8 ~( X& X" `During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
0 l$ M4 L. O9 s, o/ Hafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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4 U1 n+ n/ \2 ?5 M1 ?- zZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
2 [5 V/ A2 ~5 D8 W' r" _! Lunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
* i7 U4 e8 w6 X* QUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze- T: }6 i F! N- u1 s
forst plas.
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" I- {2 x8 L5 Z: G* dIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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