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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
3 D+ M) u1 h5 d8 `- S, l3 ibe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was; f" l- B0 j( Y2 I. j3 o
the other possibility.
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+ t/ i+ f4 |2 m v2 J4 {% PAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
& i3 w+ m: w- [! H( aspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in2 E: s7 M; c. B2 S4 d
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make V$ O+ ]0 u7 ], D B* U: c
the sivil servants jump with joy.! J: N# P* u* q* q. [! W* Y R c
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up3 H* J3 O1 w0 b9 @' [
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.% l8 c/ @$ H: i5 W- G, N
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+ a, ^6 q1 ]; t8 y4 n$ ?5 CThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
2 |' P3 d6 J+ C/ M; ^2 |$ n2 A4 @) Ltroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
9 }. G' b4 A4 }; {fotograf 20% shorter.
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8 b5 e1 e( a$ q' l0 L5 b: E, E% Y3 YIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to! P1 p9 `: T' M# o4 n8 S; r/ a: Y
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.5 M& y- |9 Q* [; w) |+ V* J# K
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
+ d, b) f1 p+ ` p8 m. uben a deterent to akurate speling.
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" ]/ w1 ]1 S% Z- k' bAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is( w8 s M9 Y' H# r
disgrasful and it should go away.
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8 n( Z. h$ h8 HBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
& {. t! F9 s% A"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and/ S6 X* b. D% _% H$ z- L
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
& _4 l# s: u- \understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.. a9 S. ^0 h* Q+ r
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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