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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will$ U/ ~$ S- v. s; x
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
4 @$ H7 w/ |/ t6 F. f' dthe other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
4 f# Z' B/ I- I( j9 z+ t6 L8 p- T" nspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
, z. Y4 `9 w9 [1 j. Uplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".0 R; c: }, w9 d8 Q
$ K- P# V2 r$ z8 i3 gIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make$ s) O; Z. u* g& B" t
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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' ~) C" O$ {/ Q$ i \+ q7 rThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
5 B. r( r6 _' L; k3 Wkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.% T9 D2 H2 u r% e
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
; T) K7 v/ v8 j7 p! ^7 vtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like5 z6 V3 H+ W. Y1 w- U' J: D; e
fotograf 20% shorter.. s% u$ O1 \" C& S
: t1 J7 T5 n* c0 B1 r6 hIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
3 E% t1 a ^2 s9 ` b+ rreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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$ J/ D; Y2 _5 P6 q! CGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
! S/ |" J8 ^6 v# c4 ]! Bben a deterent to akurate speling.$ N1 o) x4 i2 m' {2 L
1 ]/ H1 y, d% A% eAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is, }9 L: m8 T* p' s, F+ U# ]& g
disgrasful and it should go away.) w6 t/ F' N% z9 U- ]$ w# Y' }( O
- i" t+ G5 Y3 d! ABy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with5 T( q- [. h9 K7 j6 {/ c- V
"z" and "w" with "v".
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B+ Y* [& P3 g4 @& S8 S8 c; hDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and( b }2 m; A! J
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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1 U q7 P# J4 x+ R; IZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
+ K7 V; x1 c5 D6 |# e4 ?- K! A/ D5 Munderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.% t% C# _) }! p1 e' P
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
% t O+ d' W6 Z5 r) V/ w J% x0 Gforst plas.
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3 b5 d1 n; }7 aIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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