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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will2 |0 W2 V7 `& t G w* G
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was% _% p# c$ {) v% X/ A
the other possibility.) \3 L8 r" |" M7 ?
% j7 J1 D2 h) u( C4 [" H& KAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
$ j+ ?5 U3 j! Y9 c cspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in- m/ X+ ]/ ]5 G f; b# l7 V' h) h
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".) ?. p% f. O" ~7 L$ T7 N8 D
$ I- R- R7 g: B5 @' {In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make7 c7 x6 |& f) n; L! q! H2 i
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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E/ f/ c& {) \& w8 I$ R0 AThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
: g9 D6 x4 Y+ Y/ H+ Vkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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7 v7 e# U. s+ v# n4 lThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
, G5 d4 ?( G& Y7 h9 K! ^troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like4 L- A9 Q5 K" X7 H
fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to! R ~: k4 h* }8 n: e3 u7 n
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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% R1 X4 |. h+ D8 x) G7 x" G: k. }Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always4 `, W9 O4 b3 y6 f
ben a deterent to akurate speling.: L3 X8 j7 R- _- i, c
' y# \; {; K, i9 xAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is0 @, t3 j2 P; D3 e( J
disgrasful and it should go away.& c+ n. D! A" {+ ]; z/ A9 c
( s2 R) R! R! G: p1 y# C2 P$ [& H# tBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
+ U: k8 Q$ o; W e"z" and "w" with "v".
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! s+ u( q7 Y/ C s% G$ LDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
1 N# [1 X+ G5 w; g, F& F+ ^. `after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.2 Q9 m$ `% y0 U# g
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
, j3 w. t' S7 aunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Y6 h, n& R. D' J7 ]' }Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
- t: X- I* _1 Rforst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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