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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
/ u5 e; m: W" a' fbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
7 T% Y$ E* W$ p- b# y" x6 pthe other possibility.
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4 O0 X: F3 S/ _7 W( z* W/ Y3 J* }As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
) K/ y! X7 k% L# T% ~& C8 r) Tspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
' h! a6 m) `6 F, i" \3 a. {. Tplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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0 p5 @9 n. W6 Q; @0 MIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make3 K: q9 ?( m0 {# N! V/ h0 p8 v
the sivil servants jump with joy.9 z/ I2 e; E4 y/ N. m0 ~4 \
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up ?. e; q3 F4 R) |9 _4 h
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.. X) G/ g! S/ i8 O* ^6 C
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the0 D8 \- Z8 j! W. v6 G
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
* d' W/ p$ E) H7 {8 x; m; A4 vfotograf 20% shorter.9 ~: ?8 }* `8 K; ]; ~) }( x+ M7 O
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
5 G8 ^8 e1 m; a5 R* U) M: Breach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.' I, Z, s$ \6 d
0 E. r8 S2 |( X; ^+ V6 uGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always2 P, q. l2 b( _- J, N
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is1 @6 k! R' s& _/ D
disgrasful and it should go away.
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- D6 z- w: X$ ~By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
4 b3 }. W0 T% u$ y9 P) y"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
! w* } O) \" {/ L% G9 kafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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+ B- R8 ~* t" H7 wZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu5 \3 @" T; ~0 J
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
6 A9 Z1 S- v6 D$ B( c, l! d/ E: rUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
4 Y1 C6 s5 p% Q2 `+ Dforst plas.
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, ~0 d" i" \- C# t$ C3 [! AIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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