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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will" k; H& `+ G- F& _* O6 P
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
0 K/ X i! H7 D% qthe other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
! K, v8 v( _, espelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
# {0 n( [: ~# U5 w3 rplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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% x8 O& x) {: O: q1 Y- b; P2 t) TIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
3 F/ X9 [. O. S$ ^ f$ f( I: ythe sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up- v: D; M, U4 e8 i/ _( K8 a
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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/ R: N. N/ q/ b9 i0 gThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the3 z2 b1 m" D7 G
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like. o4 m2 I- I1 A
fotograf 20% shorter.+ e! R' H( T) w! [! O3 G X
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
6 F6 ?: p/ H& H0 Y+ N! v$ hreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible., ^, b% [5 ~7 }
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
4 H; m& l3 j9 |, A2 i9 |* K" t! |ben a deterent to akurate speling.) x$ h* ]/ ^8 T
K2 Z4 q# a/ |; JAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is7 m7 l9 m& a& L0 C9 O( O* Y
disgrasful and it should go away.
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! S& C2 M# E1 a4 m& d6 mBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
6 q* a# G0 B9 @* D% j) }"z" and "w" with "v".( {+ j' d& F$ y" D0 q9 Z- U
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
5 @" x3 Z o& Pafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.9 |7 D& Y/ [! ~) S5 n2 k
- E( I% Q1 Z6 sZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu8 c4 P" Z3 ?5 y8 }) O5 j1 m
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.5 D/ ~: _. O! K2 y) }
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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