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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will. \! b3 E5 `8 @. |+ u+ A
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was9 z6 l0 G9 i" G* x0 h
the other possibility.
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8 B, \% p" H- `As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English1 @9 `5 J/ F( r5 i" Z. O& i* P) T
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
5 ]3 f/ U6 |0 y: M' r) Iplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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2 W0 a S# x8 w$ ]# \6 Y: {In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
: q, K6 I p& H# u# j. F6 \the sivil servants jump with joy.- k Y( o) k2 s1 C& x
) B7 y; X7 e# H7 ]" A: S. OThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up& S; F- O9 J+ m) {" `! T/ H! k; y1 d& ]
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the: x, n5 ?( I6 W
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like4 h0 {1 Q. ?1 H6 e
fotograf 20% shorter.
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# s' Y7 `- \/ ^In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to( ~/ ~5 c+ r+ L4 e' [5 L4 p( A
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always" \' H6 I( L" H: s
ben a deterent to akurate speling.( x, u9 ^& e" Q' _
5 P3 a! I( G% f. O4 D. a1 zAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
- ^( F! Y( v c, Ldisgrasful and it should go away.1 w8 }9 b3 z- f% ~
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with0 `# n9 r+ B2 _% r! j I. Y
"z" and "w" with "v".
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( d- E7 u& c& B* k4 e; L% oDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
1 C/ P# K& b+ j) Gafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.9 Z% i6 V! p4 G5 n1 c4 |
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu7 {+ Y$ p: |3 N0 p
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.6 \- Q9 n; Z' |5 w. G
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze, d3 x9 q+ t r" Q) \# d
forst plas.
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! x1 J* H. X" QIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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