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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will: Y8 P) D1 a9 K N
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was9 z% O4 }: ], O g4 ]- ]. w0 c
the other possibility.0 H3 a8 O N' q& K
0 E8 Z) r; _! xAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
- R7 N8 u6 g7 M5 \ k$ Hspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in2 |! M5 b& T1 M% Y
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".+ E4 ^$ L4 X/ C7 f/ Y
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
1 {/ r6 X6 @. j$ ~# zthe sivil servants jump with joy.$ ^& t- \9 x9 C5 x; p1 F
8 n# Z7 Z4 Z7 z) l" g$ VThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
$ y8 F& l% k4 s1 n+ d( E: g- _$ r- jkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. T+ W# O6 p/ l4 j7 q
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the8 s0 j6 y- p, b; o+ S4 t
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
7 V0 M" T% y4 N/ y. s C# ~fotograf 20% shorter.7 a2 K/ o Y# G. y) q! T' |$ O
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
9 V2 \" _' G+ z/ Zreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
& Q4 ]) D6 N# E% w' [( G2 Mben a deterent to akurate speling.
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, l! K; N$ n( p8 cAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is4 @3 @: c7 e6 L( r
disgrasful and it should go away.
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2 O% K3 N8 ?0 _+ m) ~. rBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
# O% C9 W( h% t- q) y"z" and "w" with "v".4 a6 ` {( `5 w, T
/ n5 K- U7 G8 LDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and; B, b, I% }' I) W& e, C
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.3 o$ a0 P) j) x9 g5 S
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu' f* V8 B0 J- K% F* ]; b; q: L
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
- Y' p% U( {4 P% ?2 e+ B( Q7 CUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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