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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will0 E% O3 ]( u1 }- M- l* H0 d+ ]
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
0 s) t* r5 G2 d1 ^& r; }the other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
" C- E* y6 C+ ospelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
2 C# E; Y: I" X- O/ V6 rplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish". f* S8 @ F2 B( D
% C$ F8 _* _3 a( ~4 vIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make4 u9 H5 L4 G7 B3 ^* C( L: u
the sivil servants jump with joy.0 t/ J6 c. {# ~% ?1 V+ n
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up; b: c/ e# e& B! A$ Y
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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" a' d d. ]3 [3 }5 c" {4 l. eThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
! Y, q, F! \9 ~- qtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
+ h5 S0 K: |- |# I$ A) [/ s+ I6 Sfotograf 20% shorter.* P* c* C4 k' X. b! R! r3 x
# @, ] {, K' t! y. \+ s; J; uIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to6 o1 _# c# {& v+ X1 k3 L$ S! J
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. B+ i. @$ F7 Y! P% k
U: ]# s. B% R! K4 zGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always2 K4 c+ R6 u2 J7 _+ j
ben a deterent to akurate speling.( L% D& R# W" t6 n+ O
4 [ K8 ^# |7 s( |! a3 RAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
+ h8 [9 d! }6 idisgrasful and it should go away.3 R- D: T. y L- i z
6 C/ m1 L- P, I1 oBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with7 R9 W7 O$ K( u+ g j2 I
"z" and "w" with "v".$ g( S% G a4 ^+ g
) y! Q# O+ L' {& HDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
: n6 O# a. r" k/ q4 t% X8 ?0 ?after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.& b8 o2 H/ Y6 L* J6 d
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu9 b. t" L5 P" i
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.1 K0 K0 \- _1 _. r6 Y
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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