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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will/ {: ], \1 K9 f
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was! @- A8 X7 l8 w
the other possibility.$ {; D* | d$ a* v
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
8 X# g; Y( k, x2 ~0 L" l$ Wspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
9 Q3 D$ q) k: X$ z8 Eplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".& `# G7 {$ K7 B% F G
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make0 S2 T( k7 Z5 \6 z7 u; _' g- ~
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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$ [5 W. j& {% R6 R# q- u9 kThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up! f* i* r& D+ p
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
2 s; l2 K! E( t6 D3 Htroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like7 J' Z2 d4 c* g+ ?# e
fotograf 20% shorter.
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, w0 }4 o8 s% u3 j+ _% M: mIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to; T0 C8 o! l* J% g4 v4 s
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.- {- B& |4 v( \# x8 u y2 [& L
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
5 M8 o2 u& l2 v+ Lben a deterent to akurate speling.& }6 {0 L) n, d' B7 u) v& M
G" [0 Z4 Y4 ~4 W1 S, fAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
% x1 F" p6 \% Idisgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
* \; U" `+ u' o5 P- N"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and( z' f/ j- w# N" t Z' `
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu% Y, z" A$ \' o0 T# P6 j
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
, J( i8 Q0 I, x! MUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze2 L6 o: a8 s7 V4 F( N
forst plas.; E$ L3 e/ B8 N8 T% G0 [
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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