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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.+ r' Q# E0 g; B8 T8 m( |
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.+ }: K6 v# q; d7 Q

( c5 ^- l0 E9 V/ |$ kI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"! l4 k! [# r# T
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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/ T6 z, {5 Q: ~) jAnd the second one was:3 X2 a3 Q8 D( ^. |; T* `

; x- `! G# E  ?4 [, w"What's the 2nd Amendment?"/ t1 ~9 d+ c8 j: w) u* z
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"2 L1 J3 N# I, r0 c& n

! F- m' h# A4 }  M# i/ Y% ^6 HI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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5 M- z1 I) t9 g& hI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."  b7 p) A# r3 R7 C" X

2 R* K2 r0 {" bSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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8 \2 u6 ~# B9 G1 g% i4 `, Z" INow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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4 B/ ]4 X: @4 L  r, o3 q3 }( sImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:! i3 |7 L+ d9 X& u' ^  ~
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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* ~# A( G# @8 L& p3 i( l4 n2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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0 ~  O& y1 g+ u$ M2 h/ w"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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1 I5 D! M+ D: Q. bJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".) h9 C( t& N/ E4 |

1 F+ a% s' V/ U& `" q3 \  PRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: ; V: Q) u/ v9 G; H' d' B6 F
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
9 z1 b) L- R+ y3 `/ h怎么理解?
; O8 ^, m9 b+ v; v, h50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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  d, [# |6 E5 j* l) t! u& E0 k不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。' v. N5 G; q1 g; a: ?( j& h1 c
怎么理解?
) D, |: F7 Z, a7 V6 n/ j! I# o50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?0 c- H9 S$ r2 j0 @& r
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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! z& A5 R2 O* J. ], {  x2 N我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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