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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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6 f7 ?4 d& R# L( X  II'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.  R: p4 Y7 M" y& L) b
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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  |  ~9 n6 V! [I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:; A% p  a" q! Y7 f" z
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"+ _6 H* c$ m4 `# o* c% C
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?# p( @/ C1 U+ j2 [4 M% \6 u7 h

9 n- w% B$ h1 N1 |3 vAnd the second one was:
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+ p! s, r* |; f6 x; E"What's the 2nd Amendment?"4 J  p" A5 E$ p) t" [( u; I& P

6 ~; N; Y0 @: F" {) dI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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7 o+ @) s. @' M* N& Y"What is Roe vs. Wade?"1 z3 y& q5 G& r, |
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!% J' G% `0 R2 O6 _2 S# |

: f& j; r! @3 cI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"1 o* s3 }! O: E4 ?

- P$ y! A4 f/ @/ zNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”( `% q- C7 w! a9 y+ ?
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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: w0 j2 m+ G/ P# F4 p' Z' o1 o8 tThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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* K/ `9 |* _" r  G1 O( f; P2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.. [: e2 O* X5 X3 s- b# Y) M, d, s. {

. p$ R. a( q7 Q5 V"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.9 Z* S1 S  q: A' Q2 p

6 ?! z/ O' U( z, X' \7 W5 ]+ E6 xJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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$ y% v1 u& n9 x3 I! O9 X0 ERoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: ' m0 B6 c* l" ~& O2 w& e
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
- V0 [) Z0 j% f7 o怎么理解?# V% B# ?7 o) f) g: Z
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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) H3 c* C* \1 A2 F) t' E不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。; I0 s  y8 S6 v7 J& y: [
怎么理解?
5 ?& k& I  j" m0 u1 @50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?- f# A0 D/ V" x
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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