 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.9 ?$ o3 R2 q/ d6 ?: R* L+ Z* s
3 u; U% [9 v4 D, dI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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2 D( _+ [" G. H, H+ x0 ]I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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3 N& [6 c/ U2 XI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:3 q) z8 N' w8 G6 d) @- G! c
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"1 O1 m6 I( c1 z# u& L9 V% z% y F
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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$ m# _$ j3 l& c8 w, l"What's the 2nd Amendment?"6 r' z c# a0 [+ V" g
, \5 q6 r) M0 `, i2 @, h8 U3 }( YI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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2 [/ W9 ~; `: u"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?/ b' P" P" `5 F
" D3 P% p% H1 L* GI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!) e( K; s8 R9 s9 _! L+ Q1 p2 f
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"9 w2 b& |+ y2 W% v) l8 R
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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+ S6 Q# g* f9 j6 \2 |3 K/ B2 bThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.# W) P3 |3 g' Y3 i
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Thank you very much!( A% [5 T# Q D9 g C' H
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:4 ^, T7 Q: I, Y0 c. _" N V
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.5 T' U- _/ @) o8 }. A; Y, N( a) O i
2 { Z5 z4 n2 K& W9 c"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".0 v, c9 T! S/ P% i& B7 ^- ?6 y
: r" O% V0 [; e1 c8 A8 s& c$ _Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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