 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.% P S5 U- |! w
1 `2 p1 k7 M! t1 _. FI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.3 X" e8 r a9 D2 u
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:( M+ a6 X3 i/ W/ m
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"" u7 \2 y* t" u$ i
5 S! E( G3 S u; b M/ \9 cI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed? p% j/ {; h4 c( a
4 }8 t" L, i. `# ZAnd the second one was:
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, J9 ~; L6 ~- e- r1 _"What's the 2nd Amendment?"/ X$ b' W) C! C- ]& `3 k& A! r4 Z
$ D! z8 s# B# X. W$ M/ }I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"$ B1 K' n( U7 Z- w4 f. M
/ Z2 `0 f: e4 H! q+ L' G1 R; ]) BI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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, U7 E5 {+ B* @8 R- [, T$ w6 w* cI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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3 z: P$ e1 ?, \) {3 tI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."3 Y! H$ b! _% ~. Z- p
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?": B1 z6 Y d) ~2 i1 i" a8 [* G l
2 |6 b# Y4 y7 i% B: PNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”/ \$ P. P6 I# _ S4 B- @0 [$ ?
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!" H1 c" Y8 C( j- n2 D
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4 _0 q+ \, x. k l$ v) bImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.- N0 |7 z: E8 h$ n7 X' }4 i
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.1 V$ p2 Q; g: T1 v! z
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".6 N4 Q7 F; k3 G3 f; L$ Y; f N
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
