English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
1 q% }( F9 R- v- e' [English is a stupid language.
: {9 k" P* O( C* z) V* R. C8 }2 X6 cThere is no egg in the eggplant
9 z; d5 K$ @4 r) ZNo ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
" J: ?. W4 W4 k  M# q, OFrench fries were not invented in France.

2 F! s7 @+ L8 x& H4 EWe sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
& C1 a. E0 x! _8 w+ MQuicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

  H1 y3 i/ F) @0 j. @& hIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
& Q) N: ]+ W4 I9 g4 J+ d9 C6 PShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
! V" o! ~5 c* _# s7 K6 bYet play at a recital?
( y7 `  d, ?' G4 Z# D$ ?3 GPark on driveways and
/ ]8 Y7 f6 \: d: z+ N! q( S3 E7 P' ^Drive on parkways

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
  P! z( Z  ~# NOf a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
- _1 n4 Y) `# x6 R; ~: H2 mAnd in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
) U" C" a( y1 rAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!

English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)

+ [8 L, ]2 f9 o( w& kThat is why
4 O5 n- \; U4 [8 h; @, AWhen the stars are out they are visible
* T& l$ V! w) U4 w* V% tBut when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
+ B( N' ]0 r) ?0 G: F& rBut when I wind up this observation,
2 n6 i) @3 {) e# r9 LIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
. G! v  i/ o" U8 p& S3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
, R  I( Q7 n! P# y, c' Q# `/ R- N# r4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
& b4 G6 \. O5 Q  m实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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