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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?0 h' C' O/ n5 A, p0 K& [
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Let's face it. F, N9 ]4 m G( ]6 [! V4 r6 i
English is a stupid language.
# C W- \/ T U0 P9 X3 ], S. r1 L* cThere is no egg in the eggplant2 Q! u' g- {+ ~# n) n! x7 d* `
No ham in the hamburger5 @ y. T" y1 ~4 {
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
}3 {" W: {5 A, K, m% jEnglish muffins were not invented in England ~! `( ^& l0 |$ D4 F6 e! c
French fries were not invented in France.' J) \$ X" q) n+ Y5 X0 X4 K
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We sometimes take English for granted
! D3 J+ E- b* V( g9 XBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
( g2 h) o( ~( ]5 {1 KQuicksand takes you down slowly! v E( g h2 \6 L. }, e7 N9 ^% V
Boxing rings are square
% A) X9 T# I# H% [9 b2 H mAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. ' T4 W, k# `4 l! X; E3 @( A8 V
. p, N1 w* B4 ?" }6 O; AIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.4 ]! n4 ~, ^% Y; w3 N1 W0 n
If the plural of tooth is teeth' _4 b, g7 d* P
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
- ^5 {/ K2 ~. h) T* aIf the teacher taught,+ V& r) r6 K. K! J, @4 [
Why didn't the preacher praught. s& H; j O& N- L
* U" K: p b, z8 Z7 iIf a vegetarian eats vegetables7 ^9 c( P/ s( a
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
8 P0 [, J7 Z- e5 y5 o2 Z7 }- kWhy do people recite at a play
, t9 c3 M* b/ i, O2 }$ GYet play at a recital?9 U) M E% y9 {- k. }1 \
Park on driveways and
: n# U; Y- B) ~( l: G* j& TDrive on parkways5 Q0 ]; F6 d- k
1 j! O1 U; R) K; _* TYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
7 A: _. ]2 q- D2 y" {Of a language where a house can burn up as( N# r) @0 a6 Q+ n
It burns down; q3 r; [( O7 }6 X
And in which you fill in a form 5 K$ G. X7 ~( y" `3 h
By filling it out
- L6 J' E: N9 H B1 oAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
0 L1 E6 q3 |6 G! D4 cAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race9 C Q$ M3 [/ D- R. o) `: ]. k
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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& h. P6 F W" i. |! eThat is why" u R3 V6 J7 L4 a
When the stars are out they are visible7 `4 F+ R7 ^5 J* g1 @8 V
But when the lights are out they are invisible
* l- P/ g* U* ]4 N9 C! gAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
2 x9 Q8 a! ~) a+ SIt starts
4 b }$ r- u6 z0 h+ ABut when I wind up this observation,) Q# w- r& k& Z* B) [9 o0 ? }# ^
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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