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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a9 ~. \) \6 \. n) G2 r: Y% D! f- ^4 f( ?  i
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb; L: Y! k5 T( D" m: X
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
+ p* E- f! u/ p; t/ |* v$ ?$ T4 c4 d+ othe newfie would like to play a fun game. $ t  z1 G- Z5 a# U
  
3 ?& r6 C) d4 L" A4 h The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
6 i$ @/ M! f! Y9 @ he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The  T3 h! e2 Q* k' ^* v
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
5 i! I- R2 [" U' \% `& [ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,0 }8 e' G2 V6 v$ z
you pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I+ M% W( K4 M* U( W- {
will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
% u7 I; y/ G! l- mthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 6 Z$ }- s; Y/ c6 d! T8 M

, V! s" ?  J4 s* y/ s, jThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
7 u: b3 |. n3 y4 b5 N5 t% P+ fthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
7 k. o2 d2 P( ^
" p: [- v$ X  N0 o3 ]$ r9 |The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his9 p/ T- h" L( }$ B$ p1 t$ v- j
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the* B8 s# _, C, \9 U2 c! w1 `. ]- F
lawyer. ' r: H) f0 i6 l: D3 l& g! O- h

8 R' S" G2 M% E9 ]1 ONow, it's the newfie's turn.( F, }9 v! U+ P" Q, C' g
8 W7 \" ?) k) D* g& p
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
. a: V- ~& ~' P; F+ r% b6 N4 Tthree legs, and comes down with four?'
, h: w, R; O- F  Z( G7 R- o/ K
& n/ }2 N  d* q2 F/ b4 F5 vThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all$ @* K& H- J2 y( _0 [
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
% e& Z" W0 C+ N8 {  qthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
* [" L8 D5 O. Yof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
2 I) \' I6 n) x) fhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
  P5 R6 E# ^3 }5 g+ j9 mback to sleep.
2 S" a& C  Q( x- o) I7 m( E4 v4 a( N/ f6 Y. X; H7 Y
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He8 h3 J9 v! x4 Q9 R
wakes the newfie up and asks,
6 J9 U4 b: g5 j9 }, J" r: w% B( S. h  L7 ~
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
! c( Y. X: v- e* L) J8 ?+ [5 @0 mcomes down with four?' 8 i* A5 r: o7 D

& U; g, R/ P: V) EThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
( n2 |- a* \  P9 yand goes back to sleep.& F4 M4 y0 [2 |

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!4 J" P6 q" Z2 Z: z3 r/ k
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the4 w- v4 {9 b1 M: _: ^
$ C, V7 I) q! @
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
; `$ p1 m& r0 U$ o>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
4 j, |2 p/ _, f: q6 q$ @0 S>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
+ S0 o5 p. j2 J" }>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
+ ?/ p# C0 @* y8 [>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
* A! p% }( M, ?3 y1 Z' t% ~
1 r; {, `- p; s$ _0 r>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research + @0 ]4 K6 ~) H& f) k6 X1 O; A' J/ e
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 6 J$ ?! k- o" ]
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
8 q: h0 L( U0 m9 i- n8 W/ t>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
9 X( y  N6 f$ D1 ^3 }>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
. l7 S2 {# m% V- R, a# Q9 W; [0 V2 x+ a! D* a5 A$ m
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
  V* t; c# x" N2 r1 [8 r: N>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
  I/ H- H% p' ]8 s" l4 O" T! Y9 N>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand . K2 R/ z4 m$ e: l" M& N' R* e5 b
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 & y6 p0 I2 C) l% G; G
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
& I4 @0 A8 d  G4 `+ b/ Y, Hlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb: ^. O* U" J7 U. Z- T, r7 v
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if1 g# q. F! v& J3 g7 o% C( d; `; W5 C
the newfie would l ...
- r1 |( K; Y( r

7 k. U2 J- u: X, ^
) o9 x' a/ M0 a& T* [! c好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
% G6 |3 k/ W+ k! L% A, s; _6 I“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
8 W' u: ~$ W- V( o- ]# q6 B好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
8 O/ J, `) C' s加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
7 s: j. ~9 ]- l7 {
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 & i9 ^3 }+ m2 s0 r: m5 u! w

, C# \- q# }4 W1 J- L# Y. S4 ^& w; e) T& j1 t% y% V  Z& ~

7 g: r+ R1 z$ l9 i% u' C# t- M8 T4 V& z好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
4 E) ~8 o, z6 W1 k. }9 C“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,0 s6 U: A" Z3 j1 a
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

! z4 Q; T* i0 E# B% m# U* J7 Y真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 2 w# a1 O. N$ i$ c' f3 k

5 {& o* x" Q4 y! a: y' [. W真聪明,偶像啊

) V0 {9 r( i' V
; [( H, @- `8 C& y全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
+ q9 j2 ~3 o* d- s. H
: _: r: G$ {' a5 K7 ]. H: _7 ~( j9 @: X4 V; \. L& t' i7 Q4 w
全盘接受一下。

8 T5 A5 G& o. ^真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
, v9 j( f+ d) f! g. a! }( P; ^
+ |4 t7 n' ?8 |$ M  q4 v* P真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
  p" M# b7 G% O- ?' h
) J" I1 W3 Q6 C4 `; B' \4 S
8 ^+ a; a& A* H# [( o: D
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ! z; B( A' N9 r" o, k! v
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! {. j" M+ A- f$ S* U) Z' A% [5 t- K" l; a
别把我往坏路上领啊。

* J9 s3 w1 V- `/ ^5 e8 t你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 4 V' R& ~# {% D. o  t) x
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 % T' k" a7 q. z

1 V7 i- v' P  ?& u真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
7 C  j1 q$ H" S* t- _+ z7 G
2 S' v, n7 a) g$ M, O大学教授哦,能不剥削?

% G7 n4 ]$ L1 T- C她是大学教瘦?
) A' Q8 y5 D; ]2 l! F1 H* H大学教胖还差不多 7 t" K; x& }% a  d
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 - T6 E! A( U$ {! k% y' e% v' N; |9 R
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

$ L0 u7 W" u' K) v. E0 l5 u7 @说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ; a% I& e- C$ D. H4 Z. q
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
5 T( f. U- @0 n& z' U, n% C

$ d$ s" G4 g9 j8 C哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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