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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a7 Z: ?/ S/ y! W; x2 T+ h& J" b
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
, k3 c6 l* J5 |6 {' athat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if% \2 |  k/ o% a9 i- ?
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
+ Q# k- t9 @0 J$ O0 V  
; W8 _7 L# R, _ The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
" o5 v8 H3 i- |! e" R he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
" z/ e" c  L+ D& C0 y3 \ lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
  s0 D" ~; X  S' X1 y5 y- k' bask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,% t$ d+ g7 a+ Z; q0 u: ]4 O( O
you pay me only $5. 0 c; j9 L) I* U4 f. S3 F, F4 [3 q
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
) z+ Z# n' I: G  m8 u/ T will pay you $500. ( j$ U; S; i% @# ?5 w9 L

  {* T8 }: B! Z: Q* _  H This catches the newfie's attention and to keep8 e2 i5 o/ Q) u' l0 }  d! ~$ Q9 |
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. " u& f, w' C% p; o& F6 a
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
0 |! `+ i+ R5 r$ Y6 x  ^1 bthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his. m) N5 @- D; _
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the, H( L, S' G; ^; u/ p% I/ f
lawyer. % n  c/ q4 h1 l- f

, e/ z' |' A2 a; X' tNow, it's the newfie's turn.0 w2 w8 |) E" t

6 A6 V/ S: n! m' ZHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with  n/ M- Y3 k! g: r/ g
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all. R+ f+ B! `7 V0 a
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all& Z+ K, p- b, s, Y" F: m
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
) i! ~2 D+ j" |( D- E. l0 ^) mof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
/ }/ Q' ~- `- v, c& x4 Chands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right" K/ d: ^" f6 U6 K! m# U# E6 s
back to sleep. 5 z: z1 J! b! W5 W
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
( Y/ P5 C$ a9 Fwakes the newfie up and asks, / W: l7 ^$ k% y; h' ~5 m

0 S5 R* |1 a' D7 J2 S'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and4 v: Y* s1 m+ ]- ~/ g
comes down with four?'
* j7 c" l9 u5 f- J& r5 W
9 ~' f4 A5 q1 E/ Q  C8 uThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5" j- w: t0 S% G$ n# E
and goes back to sleep.8 D. g; B2 B. k" \

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the! _! a7 f# t( T6 I8 U' R2 C

5 [  p* f) u/ n' K>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
' C4 M7 W( `: R# X. U/ B>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 9 Q" |( g* N! I
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
) ]2 R8 }, y+ q>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
# X1 T9 U1 L) B7 \  H- N6 W>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct6 h* X$ m: S* }
$ s; b2 C! E* C7 e( X
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research & d- u  e. l6 C
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
9 d! J7 w2 @* W( e2 _2 A) ]>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
5 n, i! V0 E, n  I% c5 |: v9 p>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, & _* v7 k) V2 q4 R
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three/ n/ \6 M5 E5 S9 }- B7 {; {

$ P" p9 x5 r) [$ [* ~>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
6 s; j( P/ M. h/ l. C9 t  N( i/ R>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the ' J$ Z0 U' d0 E8 O- ]
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
# C% l& X, D6 q1 P6 h>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
6 n& v+ O* j/ t$ e) U: ]" h6 ^8 CA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
4 x/ Y3 J8 k9 k- n$ l, Tlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb7 x1 m" W5 [$ X3 r& k6 e: x
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if) M4 S3 X+ \1 G( g
the newfie would l ...

8 L% A: w& {8 T, g) n% b+ |
: f; r' N7 O% I' |* S1 W! j& d6 n9 D& S  V( d$ K( o
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
8 u: y1 T1 b6 t6 W9 e  U“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
+ |( M2 V! o5 {" s% T好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
5 v+ B! Z, P& a3 j) n3 d! z加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
* z3 u* ]8 T' w. u2 l
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 & q2 d, r  Y& e' D5 H4 A) C- V" I
7 r, r0 M& U9 e# L2 v
5 l1 j5 H1 A+ [, i+ \1 V# x
. o: Y  l7 X! e$ N
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
: k) Q6 Z+ D9 `+ \“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
7 H) r  G/ F9 C6 E9 ]% G2 Y9 |好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
- z" \( h6 C; f
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真聪明,偶像啊

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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 & t/ Y6 `% G8 {6 V1 @, o" R

  o6 ~! {0 ?! ~% @# L1 e' P: C$ m7 d
9 j8 s! i1 v% y& J0 b9 w% z9 A6 e全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
  Z2 t% N& X4 U
( n$ t3 x9 T& r" F7 z真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

6 F* j/ `: m. ~# |8 `3 v! C( n0 `: w- {5 w. ?. x
9 G. X8 r' v2 M0 A3 @; _  t
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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5 M- I% Q! g- U# ~& F) `9 M
别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
5 K+ x' s7 p& {8 r5 V5 j( c加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

0 K, T) g; P- W+ M; i5 Q- r4 ]多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 * J' D9 ]! v% D: l0 P) q5 e) Y/ g
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真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
, ^6 p% P0 E$ L( B6 k0 c1 r
她是大学教瘦?2 a& {8 t; G) S0 U3 ?
大学教胖还差不多
: W0 v7 R. [' W7 M她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
- c- F7 T9 c; [$ i紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
+ j+ y# y4 o" k" G6 q
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
+ q- c6 q6 p0 c紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
+ }! Y2 D% n! s* |
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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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