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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
* X& d3 x" ?" m5 e! I) hlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
+ Q+ |0 d" k8 {7 j* S# p% c+ Tthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
& F$ ^  Y7 ^- f' s4 U; Qthe newfie would like to play a fun game. 2 {+ F# O' z* g. I$ |; D( b; g
  
0 Q) ~- a' b; O. o9 d The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
; y, P; B5 c" o0 Q he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The& U4 J6 ?& j" {* P$ I7 s
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I5 [% ^9 z% V2 q5 R6 F2 H0 _( U1 T
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,0 o6 c0 U7 J7 c+ c2 q  S# [
you pay me only $5. 3 ?, M+ L3 e# T% K& E

: I! `' w) r( A1 P8 F' _8 U3 ] You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
) z$ ?# r" \# r$ T8 D# i3 ]% z3 H will pay you $500. 3 k. o% m% a8 q& T5 m& \6 K
8 ]+ d( F% g4 ?+ u, W6 y# R: m* Q
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep  ]' z5 m2 Z. _: T5 x  ^6 F2 t
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 8 e9 ~- l7 e1 P2 {5 p

* o1 {7 z. X' CThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
8 z' v/ ^* Z( I. l, Rthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
/ _' ]/ A! b8 z7 \' g) x* z" M
1 v" o6 A9 t4 c3 |/ HThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his! x& j  s) B, h% m: W
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
; g4 ~; E( a& E. Q  d+ Ylawyer. 3 h. @- w* |, T! H/ M

# @* {* U9 R- @2 ]Now, it's the newfie's turn.
. W( w* X) z0 E; ~9 _: V+ |* r6 }- \& N1 v! N; ]& F7 y) F# H' ], Y
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with; g8 R; M- G4 ^' D
three legs, and comes down with four?'
5 n# q3 R* ]+ t3 ]) y- }. D) ?/ ]  @9 h. S( u! e( ~
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all( ~7 H- a5 x5 [
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
# ^( X/ q: b- U9 W4 T+ l5 b0 cthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour; Y  ~/ g4 l" E( R" r
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
0 G* ]  z2 Q  c/ r) u; t* ?hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right/ a. }5 d4 C* q
back to sleep. " u" D4 _+ \5 m$ _3 y( T- `

( U- @* Z7 N5 S) k" [- T  {- qThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He# y6 j4 F, K: q8 P( e
wakes the newfie up and asks, % \$ P" H. i8 o8 a: @0 N
: H9 V$ h' `% \) Z) Q' L5 g
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and7 z4 r% E8 D% e8 U$ v+ Z
comes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $56 R* {0 D$ f# P2 ]
and goes back to sleep.
2 a5 L5 e9 O! N, E
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
9 o0 |( G. X/ ]6 R9 v# ?; S- e* U. h2 Q+ F# ~3 r: f
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
0 X, C, P: G- }% F3 e& W8 E>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason & P$ P3 _# I3 z8 M0 T3 n
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the " ]1 G- K1 T% g! K: H0 P' h: a/ a
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, , e0 `, C+ u% ~) {
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
4 k9 h2 @3 B% j4 A$ Y1 S, q" l* F- m9 Y
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research ( X# K8 N2 G+ t! C9 r: ~! C. p
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a ' a# ?1 @" Q, d2 k+ l) Z# F- p5 a( f
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
4 P; M  H- s! w, F>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, & x/ }" Q/ q& r5 B6 E3 W8 @) v
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three' F1 F0 e, o! p* I
' g3 t, V: A: k0 b# N. R
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
1 P; m1 z6 C2 ~8 [>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
7 O. G  D" v5 w2 Z9 ^>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand ) \! U7 h3 w( j6 x) M5 b
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 7 O  c( g$ |% F$ e, Z
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a8 ?* l3 B. ?% \% B) @( ~6 s
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
( |4 _/ Q  G6 B5 ?% gthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
5 l) c( A+ g+ f/ w  G& Vthe newfie would l ...
+ A3 h7 H& o9 N
% h" B6 ]& J8 U" y# x& p' Z
3 X  s) J6 \5 s/ @
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
5 @9 u  G. B- S- s' f% c5 [“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
& T3 |% t3 l( L5 w: G好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
* K. b6 Q$ x+ T7 v; C5 ?加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
' g' l7 v' {( ?9 g4 v0 Q; P
真博学,偶像啊。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 * O# K- O; P8 l

4 C+ [0 U8 x$ N) f0 h) E* M. V1 M
9 Y3 X) c0 |- q3 ]$ B5 o' f/ U' t8 M. L0 u0 }# }
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
2 P4 W" C6 ~# u# R% r6 d“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
& j" p+ r8 @5 U9 E$ T. \0 b% v1 A好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
6 C8 K# F5 h" l9 ]* D
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
: ^" ^* `  a* D: O/ T7 {
4 Q; ~7 w5 N. E8 _" J0 e真聪明,偶像啊
* H! [# C* A0 i5 w6 M

! g" \# t0 v- M+ j* G; n' w  i全盘接受一下。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 6 s1 J7 q+ m0 v$ f  q6 M
4 v$ ~: z) \. R7 I
& X  h$ u( C- C+ p) y3 G0 s
全盘接受一下。

6 I) u6 v; o# g( r6 O真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 ; n- D1 U+ _. ?1 [+ Q3 o- N
& G% Q, |# X$ q7 \2 L4 f0 }
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
$ k3 {% m8 k5 S# A7 k, k& x
6 y7 T! I9 `6 o& y+ U% C" m
+ E: S$ l5 i; m6 L
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 4 w; x( E5 u1 ~; Y. c

% t. {" V* U5 ]8 r: L# s' c
8 j, D/ f3 l3 X. [' H
8 _0 f' @+ b( C/ y- L别把我往坏路上领啊。

7 R: i* k* x0 G3 s1 q9 S. c你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
# B2 j/ j% `- A$ z7 m加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
0 @7 U( g" M& y7 S
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表   `* P3 H% t1 [1 v
! x7 s' j; ~$ u  k$ S: d
真博学,偶像啊。

, X+ `/ F% T% t: c* y2 z& _# B大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 5 B3 B( l9 G) H# A# `
+ z7 ]2 u" D' f1 x( Q
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
  L, i; J5 j& O7 q# ?( `  \- L; V
她是大学教瘦?
& i  {9 y: J1 U# k  I大学教胖还差不多 * ?: |; [. u& ~
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
& W# C3 A1 ]6 }  m) {1 Q$ {( a紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

2 C0 |1 S" u: _/ b. L- P$ T1 s+ Y说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
7 F* f. j, F6 t紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

$ W0 C3 v( I( p( n& ]3 W+ i1 s3 P2 ~* q7 p
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
理袁律师事务所
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