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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a$ G+ g3 I' V: M/ R& i! P
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
% I# x" P& l2 x; S9 vthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if, B* o, }) K; h, K0 }0 z
the newfie would like to play a fun game. + d; J  q- `; p# N1 c# y9 T  ]3 ?
  
3 j$ q, b7 t. u- J: A The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
: v" C' @( S# K2 o, x3 W# b2 x3 | he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
$ ^8 O- ^; B; s: b- t, M: _# j lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
% I  f. j# G& G' u2 Zask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
" f. p( R6 M8 y- U/ {1 ?$ u$ t# {6 @3 iyou pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
8 \/ ?& l% \8 `. d2 l will pay you $500.
: A) u" G1 ]4 a9 ]
0 Y: X9 m0 h7 X" G& |. Y, @ This catches the newfie's attention and to keep8 G6 i. S/ ^! S# M* K6 T$ z
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 8 ]  T6 j7 ^" e/ t: `* ^- E
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's* ~$ Y9 I" X6 C0 b! `0 L
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 7 z! R& u. G5 p3 C& x1 X& d
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his( y2 J$ i$ F6 i3 x
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the' x. R' B4 L$ D& O
lawyer.
5 A1 `, V$ v+ B% H( |
! I' K7 f4 s* ]: w+ U5 V6 A2 LNow, it's the newfie's turn.
  ~9 w* _! N3 B3 y6 E8 a5 k  O& ~
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with) D2 @# x6 R" y, w* Y2 z  ^2 J
three legs, and comes down with four?' 1 |0 }1 h8 a7 J. O. o
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
' Z, H6 b8 L7 G5 T! N+ wreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
/ X# ?  _4 E1 dthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour* R' w" K" [7 ~  f/ P  }; t% N" x
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and) t$ a; M, T( q% J0 H. v
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right0 j1 ^! w" a7 g/ ?& H( h4 P
back to sleep.
! o2 \* N5 l$ G& I& b, r  n+ [& X6 v: |1 K% \
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
' U4 h2 b% E3 p5 L5 O& C0 H- jwakes the newfie up and asks, ; ^; T8 O! m; G( F; o! _

! h9 W- f3 D/ E/ L* y1 |- H( a'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and/ X9 R; J/ K$ l0 Q
comes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
6 ~, m- K7 i) ^0 V9 G0 b) gand goes back to sleep.$ G5 G4 t5 r/ {% b* [" D
' a$ ?2 N% |  c: H) H/ i9 X& p# O- }
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the2 J! F8 K" o+ Z& F2 }7 L2 s
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
/ T/ V5 d5 N  F! j8 g  T0 w* Q>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
9 q5 _  l+ V, p  U5 F' |) b% @>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the 2 J: ~1 y. z7 J! g7 U3 c5 r& H' i
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ( E; I  y7 v$ O/ ?
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
. V3 |( ?4 {' n, d# M6 C3 i
" n7 O" s2 Y% O" U>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
0 L9 K# ]8 y! v( |>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 6 s8 ~5 S. `3 ]7 G
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more " G) M" @" G, ?, d
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, ) F! [- J+ p, |4 [9 U
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
( _8 j. r! ^8 Q5 S( ~' d1 T6 R3 M* D  s$ `. j; y5 P4 |, }. O
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's " J: S7 X" i. y( g
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
5 d, Y( x, i! i+ Q5 {+ i6 h3 j' H>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
1 ?: Y; v+ |5 A>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 : C* a- g. @( [% L
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a6 w/ T" Q$ ?  W5 }& C% C' r
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
( v- e' ^: Y  [7 C1 Cthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if; W. w$ m/ w( \% n
the newfie would l ...
% ]  B4 G) m0 X# _

; \% G+ f8 |+ K: {' N. Q+ I8 _7 n) k  @3 f
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:; O: e/ T& V. c
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
0 s6 N0 w1 W& r' f, l5 n9 O好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
6 H* v+ i+ y, Z* K加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

4 O5 G" S7 ]7 F$ ?. c6 ~真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ( K3 K2 a2 J6 E6 Q) ?

; B3 R) r" P( D7 d: K1 g4 m% s6 Q* c% i% P3 v

% w& ~# X+ P) N3 U好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
- m% j$ Q4 [+ z. ^“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
* d* L* N9 {, E8 I9 t好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
& E: x: g6 h1 b' X/ Z( W3 S
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ( y" P* j5 {! D, K- _  a$ n' A
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真聪明,偶像啊

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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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7 l  b; c. V8 d; P! j9 Q5 a全盘接受一下。

( v2 c8 n* K1 x1 N  V3 o3 `  F  j真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 , @  i/ @1 V) R, G- e
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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5 d9 b/ Y* `. \3 f' B2 B5 ^  v
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ) E- Y1 Z, H' j! G

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' T$ D- V1 N8 a
别把我往坏路上领啊。

9 t3 Q8 w& K! k9 {  L# ?你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
- m9 S- D# U: ~% ~/ y加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

" K+ c; D$ N2 A多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 1 M) w+ A$ n% X/ j* U! |& f& D
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真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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& h. j. v( |) o2 e, G) F8 P" X大学教授哦,能不剥削?

6 c% S5 }7 ]7 g8 u" L她是大学教瘦?: S' k( f# r( }% a
大学教胖还差不多 % U  n4 e$ b6 H. A! N8 P
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 8 [7 [$ s, O8 e$ Y  i
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

1 D5 ^% E$ s+ l* \说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 + F) S/ }( v: J+ w8 S- I, O
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

+ ?8 P" j+ h( u+ F9 C& i- A! ~& z6 W+ e" o7 p9 [# |  {
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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