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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
( M, \( K( C- m% o, hlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
$ m9 L* Q1 Y# o1 \that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if3 x4 {; u6 d* B- t
the newfie would like to play a fun game.   E- a* I2 }9 Y" h
  
  }& L8 {) O7 m* F5 ~# y6 O' }7 M The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so" h- d" M$ z  S
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
2 `1 d( [; Y; Y. l* O lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I: D# Q* T& I4 J% U, r' E
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,8 h1 U" ?8 J. P, s, U: s+ M" S2 d
you pay me only $5. & z  s$ \+ ]; Y5 i

# A8 p1 N& ~: N7 [ You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I' |& y! N6 b* H
will pay you $500.
7 ^) Y8 n. ?9 b) D/ @3 }
; B6 A% ^+ _; q% j) @' m This catches the newfie's attention and to keep' X; Z! ^, b% `4 b
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
" \3 j% x5 c5 s- C$ E6 n! A: V# \- I8 o2 Z" o) [. C
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
+ i3 p8 ~1 R$ C) }" C" Hthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
8 {( G: b9 v) [$ v  M3 G7 M1 f, I: f, z8 J9 p" J
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
6 ^7 e+ g5 i1 T& T+ Y# apocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
% p8 W. ?! i+ a$ p6 Alawyer.
4 Y  ^8 B+ n1 O1 \% c3 t* v  E- V7 b$ p/ \$ v+ Q& S$ M
Now, it's the newfie's turn.  m* C; T  U+ w( ~- s! D$ W
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
& C9 C" O0 H6 x- W0 {/ S5 ~1 Uthree legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all, A3 z, u8 Z7 S1 ]" ], c( A, W
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all, b1 H6 t# O) E+ ?6 d4 f6 |4 A
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
3 T3 \+ P0 |4 n6 h  j2 m2 tof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and2 W" x0 w, u* U" B" ]
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right2 n" r7 X% g2 ?! j+ j2 }
back to sleep.
9 h* ?& w. W# g. Z3 G
" y5 f- E  i; W# UThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
: R; A; S4 }) hwakes the newfie up and asks,
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0 X3 _( s% n: x0 C. M'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
* T( n/ I4 D4 ~0 ^9 K% {comes down with four?' 9 c8 v9 D# D* k/ C3 M2 A

) V+ \& L' @, H# m0 Z( Q+ y' OThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5' I" u9 g# \/ n0 ~% I' I
and goes back to sleep.& E- t7 C2 M' `: A3 p% E

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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& J3 w; d. j2 f5 M) u9 ?" `2 s- hLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the7 N4 u! t  p8 D0 m
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two & w- F+ w* K. a) m5 K
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason ) c* g' D. |! @" z
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
" _& R8 ~3 C( m0 f>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 8 B  H% Z+ t) a  a3 t" I
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct7 d+ i  \1 m  H' ^5 ?4 s: l) _9 I, O

6 S' V& j" |. }4 Y# u- L6 k# b2 t>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 7 F( v  P+ r" Z0 }' Z
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
( W7 g& |0 ]3 e* f>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
& f3 _; ?7 D  O% x  M3 E; f- }>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, $ ^  B; c) U/ D
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three4 ~" g( ^) P/ T' F9 J" l

6 h% p- L! Z. r& C% u7 F" m/ N>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
# r; T# d' P5 l>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the / M2 i5 K5 d: U# m
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand ) n1 F" D7 ?8 l  T( }2 ~
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 - t! X, o8 a" K$ ^& X! G0 v; C
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
( i' g& U8 a/ k. D& H6 i) S2 O, ~% elong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb& M0 `5 _( L' j# d0 m0 G
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
' ]1 Q/ G* `" }* }3 a/ C$ Z  @1 Qthe newfie would l ...

5 E( e8 u1 k  U! t6 y8 k: i, s% J$ \' v! H, X

! t- k/ R+ E7 \! D3 x9 h好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:; X& \/ }. v# ~5 I0 n
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
" R0 Y! Q/ }4 f好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
) U6 T. `1 Q" X' L  D4 {/ j加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

9 e3 x, i3 b+ b: U# w0 h真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表   C8 L0 Y0 z- g6 `8 l. x
( {4 E6 ^6 B2 f# _0 C- w

; V- k" j5 l/ c0 w% `1 A( e" s9 {0 h, I& j
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
% \% R, M  ^$ Y2 p“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,( b2 _+ [1 A5 v
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

3 g. v$ o  e0 T4 K7 X, V真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 2 ^; z" [, B' \9 a+ |
: T- R5 o. ]4 l) V- T
真聪明,偶像啊

, ?3 ^  N1 x5 c6 T" t) Y' d0 f! }: \$ V) ]" J9 o; [
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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' h9 h5 U5 ~7 p8 h! h: m4 k) c6 m- O% E2 J; w+ }
全盘接受一下。
* i, M% @3 W) F0 L& |0 T& U$ C8 K
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
; j, [- B! |6 @
+ G6 ~) p  D7 b0 |# h真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
  G# B: ]9 B7 @. C* z" H/ u1 B
0 |( T: o3 M% v1 n3 c

& v3 F3 i- K" u0 H别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
* w/ A- M) p: R, T; L  i4 x$ j  j% T" B8 n( m- i1 x
- A+ Z8 u1 I# ?2 _% |0 X# y, k

" b$ X7 i; J: |( N+ ?' Y别把我往坏路上领啊。

: W7 I1 N/ E+ h你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 . E/ {, H2 i  n4 J  X! Y' ]  X6 z
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
: P  x1 V6 N9 q2 H
0 Z5 p( m1 ^2 C8 s8 L+ c! B7 r: N真博学,偶像啊。

! X) T8 f( S. h  Z; J& k大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 9 r- A$ F& f8 Q& E+ a# l
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

; w1 e1 T. d7 @) u+ _; j她是大学教瘦?" V* H% i' U8 r9 d3 R8 |6 y- X
大学教胖还差不多 - D% y$ p0 `3 n6 }4 J$ m$ J5 w
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 / V9 R9 w0 k( B: U+ k, }4 C
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

" i- U( Q' `8 L说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 5 [, J0 I( m5 g' j9 }: ~
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
9 X' ^/ O; y6 L/ f$ {4 j2 j
2 t6 _' Y. g- s1 y# e
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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