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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a3 A* e3 Y5 @- G$ \& G
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
% n3 D" `5 Y1 s1 Y3 lthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
  \" I  c% f& a& Z0 r+ dthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
* S6 [7 s$ q' [; ~$ ]2 p he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
7 W6 i! \3 k9 g' S, x6 _, J; D+ \ lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
& Y. A1 N  {$ Y4 F0 F' [( I. Pask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
5 Y% s$ X2 M0 O1 z( uyou pay me only $5. $ E4 W" z: T) N( Q) R% a0 c
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
& x6 j9 `* u0 Y+ C will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
7 G7 F. c/ w+ r: ~9 }% }. @the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. . }7 r6 x& V0 Y8 q6 N

, a0 X7 Y0 c: M2 n, s4 m$ uThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
$ I9 Z6 J3 C1 y; ?  ^the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 8 o* }- Y6 B0 t
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
( X' |: k0 C0 ~- U1 V: lpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
( }4 v4 [, }* I# {& K. klawyer. 6 K9 s+ ^; S3 b7 `- M
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.% _' e8 Q* p5 M8 b4 [; i, J
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
( t+ f( a+ \; Q1 lthree legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all( C+ ], F3 @( T; ^& p; W* M3 d7 Q
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
3 B& X1 T. e" `; i. N4 C+ T8 s( @the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour, ~' b* z, D2 B* D! s1 ?7 n2 ^
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
, Q) M9 E- p; G3 C! f2 phands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right! [: G3 C- Y6 f$ P8 l, R
back to sleep. ! p; s; l& F) w  @- `( P9 h
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
6 q7 ^7 z. b. E$ p3 t' ]wakes the newfie up and asks,
+ m4 e% \. w8 B1 \; U6 f, k; R' D
  o. M# m9 |6 I  s! K% m8 A'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
$ f. q2 R6 O. E/ C/ V) P& m. Pcomes down with four?' ; E9 X: _. t  R! }, w+ j
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
% M4 w  k! m! |4 @6 L( j  Iand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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$ F" T' Q4 u0 TLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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8 t( |1 i% F4 ]! B>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 9 u7 Z7 y9 Y# U) f5 M( X' J" D
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
' c4 d4 l  f; ]" j3 M, o9 Y& [# d>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
5 i9 f4 t1 p; D1 Y>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
' R* s( }0 q  _( M5 H2 Y>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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+ {1 o. q" k  G* `+ V7 F, q' I+ ?>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 8 h% j& v% o3 p( }
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
6 q$ q! s, u( X2 {# L2 ?>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
  U! {4 I' n( s) Z& g>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
; f5 d% |( j# U7 x>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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( p- o5 w# ^6 {, S/ B: s>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
# L; q8 X. m/ L. q# A" H6 B* C>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 0 y' H( K6 `9 d
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
4 g& N* ]4 H% r>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 , D" G- M( N- L3 J8 y
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
2 [1 F0 P- W0 p/ m9 \) K" u4 Elong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb+ H9 {# i+ |) k. u- x' `( e4 g* @
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if" Q& r9 ^+ e' E, N8 e& O
the newfie would l ...

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: h& `# u$ R) I! Q: S  m, U; k好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:5 X3 {* F' b& ]9 ], |1 N0 j
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“," Y5 N# k) Z( }# p
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
% y. l3 ?8 z. E' g加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

, I, ?8 w/ }: |# p4 B真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 4 C, V1 ?6 a+ G0 `

# S+ f0 A7 F+ _% i$ z3 Z3 {5 }3 L0 x5 Y

/ q! s! f4 {& ?, g" {6 h1 q- g5 V好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
# K  z1 M1 Z; ]) a3 p, c% ^7 Z“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,) s. L" }7 ]$ k% x0 a7 V# F7 n
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
6 z! Z4 W# b1 `( u1 K
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
' _7 A- ?4 V; F, L
$ @- u8 c( d$ ]5 q, B4 a0 M真聪明,偶像啊

1 U0 v6 R, w; t& ^
# H; x1 G7 l( ~6 R% [全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
9 y' |; L- X3 ], e/ d  y6 ~/ Z4 {( k: O$ Y! z: q5 V* A* m8 X+ H

9 p0 O; D' L. D1 S: x0 z全盘接受一下。

3 n; y( p( \) y+ [真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 # ^, r0 S. o; c- P, z
* l+ y* M0 U4 O/ o. {: l7 }0 a3 ]: |
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ) C3 y- s+ m4 W  [4 p, Y+ w

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别把我往坏路上领啊。
! g  w  s3 ]0 w5 X# D4 N
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 & o+ l- q7 ~% U9 Z* b7 y& F& O
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 1 ^; E& ~, v, E! H. k
1 \- O, l9 m  g' u
真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 - P  V. [6 B1 D$ x# E5 Z1 n8 z

6 s  v) R# W4 Q5 A, Y6 ~* O& [大学教授哦,能不剥削?

5 |; i/ D# j8 {; r0 t! x! `9 o她是大学教瘦?' ?$ z; t1 D6 ~- d! Z
大学教胖还差不多
: J4 @  L% K8 t( P她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
: i' y3 s$ c- P8 E9 v3 `紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
% V1 Z. C' }& i2 h: s8 }. L
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
; Q; T! Y* v6 ~6 n紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
8 H9 g' ^5 b0 a& ]5 A

: S3 y. B- u* f5 `! n哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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