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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a  M9 J$ r. p) s* F' |
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb( i  ^# R/ A3 }3 S+ s8 I9 n5 S
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if% q& J9 h. K+ d0 M1 p3 ~* U
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
/ p2 ^" L+ S% g) M. Y' ?$ s  
6 L/ z0 S8 h/ o The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
; r" z$ p/ y8 v/ L he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The0 N4 q( V- b1 h+ T7 f- [
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
: B: `/ @2 }' B4 Vask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
$ z$ o2 ]' @2 H' K' eyou pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
4 v) U* f0 y& x will pay you $500. / [8 f( ~8 Z/ L7 {# d# Y; J, m# U
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep* D' X' q) |) Y" y
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's2 D; h6 q# Q( }4 [
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' $ M: x. K  o* m$ W" }3 i) B
2 P( E5 U! u4 ]! [$ c8 p( F4 [
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
7 [1 t! a# p) gpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the5 [* v+ i0 F% s5 @/ U. S8 x% m
lawyer.
$ h! h# ^3 ~, Z/ J  c4 b4 j+ j. t- o9 X: I" U: g) Z
Now, it's the newfie's turn.8 ~- [$ h% c' ~3 p# X) {# x# {/ T$ d
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with" [- A7 J. l) I" z+ K
three legs, and comes down with four?'
5 g, n, u# |$ d# C
; a4 T. x' }& {5 v4 |4 d- j5 ~9 hThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
" \" w) m: Y- dreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
6 T% W% G" e* K# y6 ithe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour4 `3 w) O, y9 U" C! C/ Y  W  o
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
. M6 n1 q4 \7 U  }4 Q' dhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
) W/ W# D0 g& l. ]& T! Cback to sleep.
/ I- M  w& ]8 k( I2 i
3 X4 c/ r/ m( s" E9 g$ o( |+ O3 t/ WThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
; P' `# _' I+ ^; h" }1 x) w8 |1 |wakes the newfie up and asks, ( N0 x% G4 s3 [9 K2 A3 U( N

" R! L# w, p# N: {& V' d, B'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
9 W* e% I5 T7 L7 [+ N$ }& Xcomes down with four?' 1 a. x1 |7 t2 o0 q' ^. ]1 q
# w: I6 a$ j. B# q# j
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
# O# R% `' K% I6 J* N) ]' Y& oand goes back to sleep.
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9 L$ o# W. |2 _  _
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!) k* ]# }7 E- {2 O: Z
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the7 y6 t- ?3 b; K! S

- f  r/ w6 P& ]) O! n5 o>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
! _4 T& Z) {: y5 X, v( w. U>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
$ S$ R( w2 v0 j- k4 l+ I; w! Y>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
- f' o4 y- Z# s; C) r/ q>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
% {" I7 O5 |4 _) z. N$ e  k2 t>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct/ a) b6 W6 V! c2 D$ E' v

% i" `5 y! _2 s0 l* R>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 0 P* {0 ~* L% H8 }
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
' `! D: z! r% n' q) l/ B, L5 Y* d9 E1 O>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more ) S6 J. n2 {. `6 K* |
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, $ E/ L% m2 |: x4 F& e; p+ P
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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/ F3 s+ y3 T/ |>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
- H7 P! E0 Y' U9 b! B. W& G( n) `>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
7 T: f, T, l3 h$ x>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
( K2 Z' v1 J( K' u1 i% n6 U9 P>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
3 v+ @' \( n' L8 }/ z+ \, F& a8 z6 _A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
( _5 d7 L$ C' ilong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb* j: t# B7 S9 L- O% u# U: h" i
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
# g: O- `$ E7 }7 {the newfie would l ...

, }- B- y. `% S" @1 {6 I0 H* G0 p! x7 T( N; A
$ K* C) v, H4 w9 C
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
; [1 _2 a) F9 j9 N; U- v6 K“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,# i7 P/ }& J: ~2 k, U, q  b: O! B
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 " D$ }# _: E' ]% K; Q5 s6 E
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

" q8 \: s$ V" c6 w, `& F真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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  @$ v9 w4 D0 g/ x/ u* l
4 L2 l" m! T$ s: u9 T$ H2 ?: {
) Z# F/ U  H7 p" c+ u好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
6 [. }" I7 Z  R“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
1 g6 P* F* q" L! z5 o6 N$ s好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

. t  z% U, {7 n& Z. q6 S5 R% z真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真聪明,偶像啊

9 S, o0 ^' V! G% |+ g
0 g8 h/ R/ n0 t1 J- S全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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; S7 t+ ^+ L+ f7 x0 Z9 G( W1 f2 U: {
全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 8 M: v9 `7 z3 L' X/ a
# O) C& R7 U& Z5 [3 y! N# a
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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6 f; m* L. d$ E) {! l1 W4 M, U4 d* T+ v; z* ~( T( Z: {- V5 E4 y

9 F5 s. I- ?. J8 ?. a7 e# W别把我往坏路上领啊。

! ~$ @( N; T; X+ O: Z! Z6 p, \你已经在路上了
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ; U5 a9 `5 [1 ~* [& O0 {' p
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

$ V+ P' ]8 E) f- e+ C- H4 U多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表   W8 t* \5 S! F4 M4 l
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真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 - |' W/ u  z% v6 Y6 D6 v

- M0 |8 N2 T5 Y( ~  e& a+ Q6 c( M大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?
, P( T6 n% v& z1 N- m大学教胖还差不多 ( s8 _6 X7 S7 m+ c
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 3 B( ^9 u5 K" K1 S
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

2 `9 o: {* T4 i8 }( w/ m说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 & y. U" Q5 V2 v; I( H
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

" q* q$ Y8 N9 h5 g
; q: L1 s4 h( g哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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