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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
! e9 G# y7 }- p2 r- N; }$ l3 _long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb- d* ~1 c4 c% P5 y, N* p) b$ T9 ~9 v
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if$ A2 x% R( `0 ?8 X' G3 R# b: _
the newfie would like to play a fun game. 2 i. H/ p, f: `; c( z
  " Z& H7 \  A+ Z% c- k
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
! y- Y$ [4 ]2 M' g6 y/ L+ _. T he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The4 \/ b+ f- A! G, ?
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I, j0 o4 O& m  R2 J9 n7 K3 J* x
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,- T3 F% z6 B& U0 A& B1 y  h  P3 x( c
you pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
# G# M7 ^" Q  }( D6 c will pay you $500. 7 e% }8 Q/ C" L9 N# L

% Y% J* q' P/ f0 I5 J6 v8 B This catches the newfie's attention and to keep- ~  {7 |* m- w
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 3 |' W0 k4 i8 i8 E" q% U* k. v

0 m! n  }. S! x% L% yThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's  d4 J7 I1 [; u1 ?/ H
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ) v& N1 f6 u  J4 j( p! g1 T1 X2 z

1 E) x' F, t) x6 y7 r: T' HThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
0 {( x' x' z; L4 W8 d- b* {pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the( K) n7 {$ [; b- a8 W% O: a
lawyer.
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& g2 T7 c9 Y1 y% p1 ]6 \Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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5 x0 Z* u3 v) d& `3 WHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with2 ~) k4 E: V( n' Q
three legs, and comes down with four?'
5 }7 x) m" _; @3 o0 ?8 }6 a
% n& z$ q( B# C+ ZThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all; M4 A1 q' Q+ e
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
( m$ {% c9 n) A" I$ uthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour$ ^- D" n& s0 f' Z; a
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and0 I7 t. }5 |: t- Y, U5 }
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
! N: L9 b- ~$ R" C" @3 Wback to sleep. $ I$ ?, |4 c# b# q* X
$ C2 o) v* ^1 d- N. |5 ]
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
' `9 O! [0 O& E, f- J+ o. [wakes the newfie up and asks,
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'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
6 R5 W7 X% _) \* {6 Ucomes down with four?' / @% s; \& g9 C! d+ T
2 O' C0 d: @* \
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
6 `' ~/ l! H7 eand goes back to sleep.
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$ E1 T6 }" d, c
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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- f; T% [# U) R, o# U0 kLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the; p' N0 ?. y5 l" n  R
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two - A( l7 T4 \$ y# |+ z. b
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason . D, E- F' x/ ?; r: a( Z3 c- y/ z) E: {
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the 2 j6 y* p# X! H+ G
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, $ F$ u8 b1 R( \& @' `
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
1 x8 a: S( E5 f: W: g
8 A: c$ r4 I* S4 p& B2 U' l1 p: \- f>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
5 F' G$ L" d5 i# T' T  c) |, y5 M>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a % @& Z/ b) T1 q6 p! X
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 2 g3 T6 E+ y1 d- l* E
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
9 s$ m5 o+ z8 ~% e>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
# m/ d! U) e7 F; t6 m$ ?; U
" s7 `% T2 z% Y( W% G>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
* f( O5 Z% q) I! @>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the ! F8 u7 \% D# J  C
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
3 d+ j; ~; \3 E& P# r8 u>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
. }) M8 P; G# T8 `A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
. B% H: h5 q- N: A8 j! Vlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb! w6 w7 J% \  B- S5 q- t4 T: o
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
5 R9 A8 H9 G( @6 @9 Z0 xthe newfie would l ...

) \, u# R) p' X9 x* d0 f
0 d/ u3 q6 T/ }+ P- w$ e% b( L
% p. ?7 i0 v$ G, q好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:* x2 k  e6 u: i  j
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,* u2 l8 c" V* ?
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 " b1 k- `: U* \$ H6 ^4 W
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
+ l% E0 ]2 K; u1 r! A
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 + Q9 J* v) I& c! V, }% _
/ Q4 v% D+ x: w% k( j) a) U1 ?, ~1 f

& T$ b" `# }/ {: q5 q5 H" D* {/ t1 g0 d8 O1 i4 S
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
- Y4 |' S* c- ?" I- T- t“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,( n: n: h- o# `7 _. q0 t9 z& k
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
8 J$ l5 t, n2 F; S: H
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真聪明,偶像啊
* @2 C1 `. a( E% {; E* Q" z

& Y/ z6 m6 ~9 E6 [# R全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
- E4 _! Z% l& K
% E# M3 a& z" y" }& q- H% ]8 R1 }" @; @3 s+ `0 c, x! f: e
全盘接受一下。

8 k) P2 n! w! q+ K) C; q5 n真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 ( Y6 d2 m3 B0 c% a! k

1 `& P9 o8 C8 p7 ]. t' a. |  F真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
8 u  J* e( d3 |7 H

) c& L, J% }6 k8 \3 `- t) E1 W  F" H
3 e( ]1 r1 |, v0 _# I5 C5 k别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ( [' B% S& _3 ^* @  x

+ J" c( S* V/ F0 P' @! B& o0 O3 `8 n% ?& V8 f* [
# z) ], s& b7 K* I' u/ ^! F* A: F
别把我往坏路上领啊。

7 h- d; g6 x2 W  ?* a你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
! b* o& G5 q8 V: j( M- b' y9 L% g加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

1 J- e, V9 v  C- W多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
/ N) H1 m( `( U4 B( f, o1 s2 R/ e- N* l* i" C$ z8 Z' e8 X( z
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?$ i7 r3 m* c, t0 U& \
大学教胖还差不多 0 O, }# \* x2 g8 B
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 - X+ A3 B8 i: t# K
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

. o4 [$ d& W& M6 g5 ]9 ?# [4 X说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 0 _6 n( G# c  U9 O" t7 ^: [; j
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
) Q: @/ @4 ?: S8 {0 {- c6 g0 T

  w1 Y) h1 U. y. K8 Y哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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