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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a" F( D* D2 W( j6 s) L
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb( D0 d3 G) b- _) g0 @
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if+ T# J* @) W2 B  U' n' X
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
1 ~* k' F; _5 \: M  
5 z$ k% {5 c$ A% h+ J+ `2 h The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
7 ]5 D  O8 b+ f0 Q* @& p! i he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
/ V- v8 ~: A* G1 l" A& [ lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
! W' ^# c% u% jask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,5 t; x5 g2 P( u
you pay me only $5. $ ^- W5 u: I% q
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
0 s) V2 p, L7 ]+ _5 \8 Q$ _ will pay you $500. 8 G+ \5 G0 N7 ]+ _

7 ^6 K. O2 S3 J. |; S This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
9 j/ |9 A( ~! a3 D9 qthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ( F& P, s0 \* A
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
* [1 y" p( h+ tthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ' S" M& |  t" b. Q
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his' ~7 j1 C  |- M& N  Q
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the" _5 q, T% X8 o8 |# `, n3 ^1 F% i1 S
lawyer. + P$ b1 M" y. `2 h

0 q9 c3 p, Z5 w5 xNow, it's the newfie's turn.
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+ Y' a7 Z! e' EHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with& R) O# E# M0 G8 I( {8 ~, }* U, a
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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7 b7 m3 U8 _' `4 [8 z( v; HThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all' j! ]0 W! r) K- Q' V! M6 l
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all$ E: h7 J4 `$ e! c+ B
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour" W' D" {5 K* M6 V5 ?
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and0 G6 m+ T( o6 q; i3 Y5 |! G
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
8 r# d2 z# B3 H/ w% `back to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He' Y6 b4 [& M& h
wakes the newfie up and asks, ( h) x' E3 b9 X" Q+ e
+ G& ], i* ~  B5 g" F2 j' k1 A
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and- u+ d- |3 d: }3 m
comes down with four?' 0 _: y( x' @8 Y2 p0 Q' E9 v0 t1 x

- S0 z& `8 |& O) Y1 Q8 SThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
, _* P  I. B6 D0 A+ b8 N3 uand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two , e$ u' d  d3 S: _) w( Z. `! n
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
& |3 l* N* P& j" y5 w>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
, j' C8 w) N9 e. f* D0 i>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
! B- q, n- z7 K  i2 s* s>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct" s- \& h" t* ]1 }! J% w6 b
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research ' }! X; G3 s% s' y$ G$ i% J
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 8 _, C& w0 N0 b% G+ ]  E8 G0 R
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
  J5 b: ~$ ]" C  v  L>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 3 g& y( S: n( P* g
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
7 F8 C7 b" z; e3 b4 B; D2 `>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
- c* }% D, ~' [. g>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 6 d# e5 t$ x: g" Q" P$ T( Y
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 # m* e: [8 U4 n; E* d/ ?7 J9 J
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a% Q2 M& x2 R: T5 j6 i; p8 z
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb$ P- \8 q- ^  P; L: _
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
7 u+ `# m) Z4 A: S; z, [# Cthe newfie would l ...

6 H) G6 ]; I  U$ F' Q$ s+ T$ ], F: h2 O: o( _: u1 ]6 s# n  {# E

3 \2 C1 s1 p. H( p1 Z好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
, ?/ \7 I3 j0 {9 {( T“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
. U9 I8 p, Q% O* P# X$ R9 k好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 % v; M. v1 t9 s5 \
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 1 f2 J: f# m4 Z

7 X0 h+ m% c$ l7 Y3 H( V) F- n6 j( M3 h

( ?+ \( A. K: g1 b' T7 j0 X好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
& f' F3 G- Q( B% u( i- k* w“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,8 T1 A  N: {  X# W& P- ^: _7 w
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

4 x' _! e3 K: b% C( E  h- t真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 " h" A1 |7 P, k" S# r3 ]
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真聪明,偶像啊
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' \4 ?0 j3 `) y" x% e
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 7 u! @. r# o7 ~1 E
7 |6 O! @8 w, k, `* F! I& c$ {
% D! ]- b) X4 R1 D9 f. M' v
全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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8 q; p* L3 p6 T! [0 X# B# ?5 s真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 1 |+ E/ N$ Z9 x

& b3 m9 \  [/ l/ s! _
, t3 V0 S1 W( x8 m: \7 S( n
1 c1 J5 p: s% S( q7 O6 a, d  S别把我往坏路上领啊。
# o0 |, B$ u: o) `8 Q8 w$ H7 Y! b
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
5 j# m1 `7 p# u4 L0 E2 S' u& s加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

9 w* I4 t5 p+ N! ?" Y% Y多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 6 o5 X6 h: O. q5 T, X; i( }

" T8 ^  b7 b  h* A/ i$ T; u真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 / I" t" ?) a9 U' n; F$ Q  K
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?5 S2 B. F3 C( ^+ H; w
大学教胖还差不多
0 x) F6 S5 h( V7 K0 e) I她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 . Y% K+ s: K  l; e/ K4 u
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
9 [; ?/ }3 S9 |7 k! b/ ^% {) \9 @
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 / {8 A9 q9 U% W
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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* Y. o$ ]! P2 n! O哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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