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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a) b- V) z/ k" C8 O) ~. _
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb+ `' t- p, i; J0 C  z  B! s
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if# E# h! B4 C5 c: x7 ?: z
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
% a  n, J2 Q5 Y. D# a+ ?  
9 J) |7 X: n1 Q( `% m The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
, q4 k  p* O0 C: H he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
- F' H, [" _  S3 o! q% h- _ lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I8 y' V8 ]/ P' m( X6 W# p
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
6 l- u: u1 [6 A9 E4 S- @you pay me only $5.
- }  H2 r. o  u
2 L* Y1 S) z0 d3 p/ [- ] You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I: z& g4 Q5 [9 O1 k4 O. t# Y
will pay you $500. & i: {# k$ @# t0 M& A: S
+ z6 f8 G9 `6 m" E
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
3 t, i, H3 A! _2 \the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
( ?8 B; }3 b1 h+ ]; f
4 S. Y5 w9 N; H0 ^The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's' @/ ^" h5 d# M& J! U' f1 I
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
% l& q  ~0 c0 n( j9 s
' W1 p( h& h9 w" c! N3 E! o! jThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his5 z3 B: h) {- O' g! {) ^4 T
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
+ h! }) Z+ R) e6 W  k/ Rlawyer. & \0 p" x9 _- J; i# Q$ h' q7 V
; ?$ y9 J- W' I
Now, it's the newfie's turn.  g& f) V" Z8 s+ }) w# G

, b$ F  W* k) x; [# n9 |5 d  d' PHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with" c0 Z" ]+ x9 q5 E' N: S
three legs, and comes down with four?' $ t- {8 ]  O- ~) k: f* {

& _  n" x4 n. h8 nThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
  d7 ?* L" [8 T, ]& e, t. Z* oreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all. ~4 h; F# ^6 z) Y+ b" E  h' p
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
& h1 v, _; L, s# r8 vof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
1 W- _, Y. D+ k( Ghands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right4 P: R/ D; i8 q3 C
back to sleep.
/ i) w7 H2 T$ A2 i9 f: F# V& m
$ L( b& n+ t) z" j" o6 t+ n2 u2 dThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He3 e$ Q  t9 U; Y  A: p
wakes the newfie up and asks,
* r1 }" E+ d% `" F# W& r/ C3 [6 C" G7 W0 a1 q! [$ o0 W0 ~
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
: t8 N2 X9 z; i( {" G: Wcomes down with four?'
" S1 X" j7 D3 K9 }/ \2 o
7 W/ W2 H. h: XThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5% E$ T2 S* l; D2 }
and goes back to sleep., ?& _. J1 `+ {) L

/ Y! `9 u& r( i% ?
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!" r8 t0 b! C- w% C. z* I6 A

' Q. C2 c& {# x' y/ }: NLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
% I* \) A5 M& J4 \" L% ~. c9 K7 P' J1 g
/ \& t$ V4 E9 I3 U! o! r8 T>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
1 A  j. l) j  i+ z; o>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
9 u" C* f* m, O3 k>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
( ]4 j* L: C" z3 @& j! s& L8 s7 D$ Q>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
8 A0 C5 t; b, d( x8 c0 R! S>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
7 p4 g; ?  W# [6 v/ Q# b- Y% {" I9 @5 N0 g7 t/ @6 O! _, _& h) n* }
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research + e) I: S4 z; Y
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
; G% _  G) U9 c>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
$ g3 E+ d- Y: L: l>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
; g7 F- L( S; k>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
$ P2 m1 {& R& }9 \& M
1 }( c; ?. W) B! ~$ `# Z>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's - n2 o8 v' {2 c  s
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the $ v1 G5 h6 Z# ?5 s
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
7 u4 b2 S. ~% \; \  @& X3 g/ ?>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
* j! M/ o3 _/ E7 K0 AA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
/ W0 V! K. V) y+ H. ^3 tlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
: C' m1 ]( |8 k5 [: {* t5 V- Y9 i- wthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
7 x2 e0 _( l3 l/ b6 athe newfie would l ...
: w. h- W; G9 b) X, k& w8 H1 m3 r
- T9 W. D( L: n' e6 i! X9 e

3 }8 F4 I4 ^( [# ?1 q, Q好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:  e3 G, u: z9 n6 w# c. C
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
1 F# [, j" B; C/ n" t: @7 R好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
" V5 Q4 q" V6 W加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

$ w  u9 J3 P' q/ p# b真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 2 q: I2 i5 J. p1 w
: h3 M2 x# W% s& G1 Y2 q! C& W7 z+ Q
( G  {( H0 Z3 S% y, E+ s

" m; F, y2 h' }/ x好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
. x" J- k) R+ W“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
; |/ U  l% _9 p3 g好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
2 F( i, g6 d1 q
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
& l  }. Z+ j* K; A0 O, N/ `4 f) l' S
真聪明,偶像啊

- _: {& L% \, m+ K& E  K% r
, I/ g: l# R: B8 @" [( f全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
0 q8 Q7 I3 N# u- Q, `2 @% H$ t3 Z+ P7 J' `

( V5 S- Z( l# v全盘接受一下。
7 [" s( u5 M. o) ]/ V- Y' B
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 ; E' _; |. a/ Y) c0 V# a! l$ i3 ~

: k1 s! A" b# _; g+ y真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
8 y9 N- |1 L& I- V4 d# h' a6 f) p( {

& k# c* G8 z! a/ U) V
( D$ ?$ W( l+ t! \: {$ c+ c别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 0 r+ t6 ?* t4 ~$ Y

4 ^( ?7 m# [9 R/ y5 T! M9 M: [* k( l
3 q9 \# i. j( o" G( _9 m. [
别把我往坏路上领啊。
' K1 m: p4 h* V% y* x& _' b
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
: v4 o# z. H' M9 l加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
: k, P' _7 N  b
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 * v5 L6 u( ]# O5 H, ?; u
, U* p2 `, U" H% P- p8 z( \. [5 g
真博学,偶像啊。

  ], b! C( L5 R! S大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 6 u: L; v" L/ a6 k

2 P0 p' [4 D4 q& d( h$ X$ U. u大学教授哦,能不剥削?
8 U" B& @8 y! X3 Y+ |/ f
她是大学教瘦?
$ k$ p$ s+ }4 `  R0 p- d8 g大学教胖还差不多
0 H, J5 m3 x3 t/ B5 |  G她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
8 D3 O, d1 d: ~. U0 y4 a# [紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
' ]/ l$ t! R$ P! q2 _+ Q2 W4 @
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 + K. x. F& Q% X, T
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
' b4 x6 E( J# ~. T0 `0 E
5 f$ a4 x: X& B) U. p! S& n2 u
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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