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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a# o3 L! ^8 v( U( k
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb' H) j4 c5 Z( j$ g- z. K
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if; b+ ?# R* Y$ r# [5 o
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so) C' p" f0 E7 Z, @4 j" J
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The' s% F4 f; z% ?& t8 r
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
2 D6 k9 I8 S- Mask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
; e' r% f4 k5 L  kyou pay me only $5.
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0 h% w; o# @$ y8 Z: b+ O You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
5 D9 A4 B* Q4 ?7 e/ H" s6 o will pay you $500. / F" b" g+ y' J8 Y, p
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
, `) O- d$ D9 y" ?+ k; ]. Hthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's" U! ?9 O$ ^9 D4 x4 |" W' A" O' ^
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his  a, X2 W  _; A# C: N! D
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the+ `/ L6 }% a/ w5 J1 `! {6 V
lawyer.
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! \7 ]# O' H+ `( l. jNow, it's the newfie's turn.
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5 u, i  w7 n( }0 ?He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with$ j, L' e/ ~; ?& W! p& m9 h
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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! {/ f5 P; g  ]6 x/ H* R5 |  kThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all4 \/ d2 e/ q) X& A. j% N9 H( ]* p5 `
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
4 [6 C! Q( [, G- M, Tthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour1 P- |! ^* I4 m4 P; ~0 s
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and6 p( J  m" J/ w9 Q
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
" n2 ^6 ]6 E* E8 e& gback to sleep. " Y6 g8 A" q/ i# c6 m* U6 W

/ K# v2 M' i) M2 J0 lThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
# ?& z) [1 d- z9 P5 qwakes the newfie up and asks,
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'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
6 h5 {9 v0 u  Z8 q* H: T7 rcomes down with four?'
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/ O# w: O" j& r6 {. N) H3 cThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
: D6 w0 Q" r# Q# C- pand goes back to sleep.3 q, d% p1 A8 j! I* M+ d
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!9 o  {' U& R6 k9 w% c. w
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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( o( L" P8 Q+ D7 M& d/ p3 G>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two * `& A" Y, Y% |7 m4 j( C
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
& c4 O' r# z4 ?8 a1 Z8 p3 `4 k>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the " l# i2 ?+ f" l. _# A, Q: Q& O4 Q
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
% ^* S, X8 h& \0 [. D>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research . r! H" ]6 `& J
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a : {5 J( B. X4 F8 d. Q3 R
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
6 H0 z1 r8 `5 j, v2 Z>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
* d' I1 s  j- j>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 0 L# b4 `; i1 s; W/ D1 N( X% Z( U; D
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the & F6 |( ~9 s+ ^  Z! x
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
8 c* [! {3 X" e" K' Z! Q- f* x>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
8 r! f9 @4 C1 j# e8 @. kA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
9 m7 h; h" i' h6 Olong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
0 `' ^. k" P, S% h& `* Gthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
! R; U& C+ u9 C# Kthe newfie would l ...
9 N, A. v" K# N% {9 B) m
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好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:" m5 e$ \' h; N0 b* r' I
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
- B2 R- [; n: C& ~5 B: a4 q! v好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
8 l+ y/ F/ q, V; n1 r加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 3 }' K" p$ v7 a. b
; s% T4 N) h) {: S4 B' ?* y

2 A# {/ s- o& i7 p% s/ d0 |2 j5 ~+ h2 w" p+ F0 G1 o
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:0 b0 M! `& G! r; Q* v& P) W6 J6 z
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
. \7 Y. O% X0 L" {. r好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

7 k/ P+ D$ f3 H# u, m真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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5 [3 P7 Z* ~8 `' Z* _真聪明,偶像啊

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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ! G( P: l! O# L' z$ a' P

% L/ C5 O3 p% f7 c/ V
1 W2 Y3 t+ P& V+ |全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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7 c- K( W& J4 J4 C真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
2 ]0 A! ^  P) a) P4 {- g

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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 " q$ Z# Z6 t% O8 _" S
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 : k% n! q8 F% z+ |! [
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真博学,偶像啊。

  U0 m0 X! c% ^, n大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 9 j& `, Z7 n9 h" Y- U0 X$ E  H
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?& v/ e, T. L0 Y
大学教胖还差不多 4 L& Y) |7 v8 `8 w; ?/ Y2 O2 z' z
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 $ n2 y$ V/ _' d0 m
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

8 _' t, f- X1 b说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
9 n/ M' T- L) e% @紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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