埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 6139|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a2 @/ s/ j5 U* I# d1 B
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
$ q9 g1 y) x2 cthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
( H# C; o! z# `' \# P) fthe newfie would like to play a fun game. + J& `& [+ `- m9 w  j
  ) p4 {; w+ x4 A6 Y
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
0 u- w  B9 l/ y7 t he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The: Q& k# F" U2 J/ j; D+ {. Y
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
' t" G7 P5 `) d. s! o  xask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
) p: k9 U& @1 J. ~1 Cyou pay me only $5. 9 N0 k% R' @% k7 u! a
! {4 b5 @' |/ ^
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
. ~6 K% C( S2 m will pay you $500. 6 S; K1 L3 [0 V

1 N) o# f* T- X This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
# [. d! R( A1 p% n: Z/ dthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ! W  a- R( \4 C
3 @$ Z( P$ U, A& H" U
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
0 s( s2 }, q8 O9 m4 c& |" U: Lthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ' S3 m/ t9 }* k3 ~2 x( u: W/ M
- ^. i, V; `. R7 {) Z. M
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
! v3 G' b) @: J7 lpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
2 k4 g8 X6 g$ Y0 t; }' W: Tlawyer.
; i+ d8 Z1 P' \/ S: F' `, I2 N* ]/ @9 @( D- W+ o
Now, it's the newfie's turn./ L1 D& R# {# x* l) N% H; q0 O

. x9 R  D1 P. V) H: yHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with6 Y; Q' ?7 k% `! k
three legs, and comes down with four?' 5 U6 {5 G! M; r  k3 E

; r- q  G! H9 _The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
5 @) w/ O1 W8 I+ g- H3 @references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
  F6 F5 z! ]6 F5 ithe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour+ V, Q7 r- L% {1 m4 K. h
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
6 W5 u8 T! L* r+ G+ Shands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
+ E- Q- m! X: U4 O  Nback to sleep.
3 c4 j. k9 X" Y% C: Y- P1 ^- q, F! J& Y
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
* ^- c! z: i2 |( P/ Iwakes the newfie up and asks, % X8 O, y4 `: u* |5 y4 x: P3 C
  L3 M$ e/ e0 R; D
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
8 i: }! y' q5 D) W+ Q$ n3 gcomes down with four?'
# O1 L% Q$ V/ Q% E% b" q$ ^. [- r8 K
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5- d8 F4 L' l& c& W% g, d9 A) b
and goes back to sleep.  g+ T: x1 r! N' E. u: ~
- U. S& @: l( e% Q0 L8 p* Q! `9 N2 Z( U
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
8 B6 Z( e8 w# x" v% v$ s8 e
7 Z$ G$ P7 U& H4 Z7 v' ~  k5 E  _% `Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the2 E- q& |# a( `0 ~4 u& J) N
- K4 I9 w9 a+ Y6 C
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 1 z( y# k3 K% c3 @0 P
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason * P6 P# i, m% R$ w- l1 X: T- g* f
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
$ {. C) o  ~, a8 f) d>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ; O/ R3 B% `) _; _) q1 G
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
* d: P$ q+ l& Y5 w) r
3 w7 {$ Z# t) c>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
" _: M$ Z2 ~" y& {: x8 e" M- _>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
$ w; K& T) E- a2 {/ U4 N- E>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 9 `! F7 W9 t' f3 a8 i) N6 [9 ~% X
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
# o) n) A' H# y  c>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three2 c7 Y/ W) Z; o; n4 ^4 D3 J2 H( ]2 N

7 b4 `" D% a; b>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's * Q, N6 t& _$ \5 f
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
6 C* o$ [6 N) t& i" {  D>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
: f+ ?9 B5 d1 h: I4 N6 n>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
4 ]- }8 c( T/ U. N: q* wA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a" q$ L; p, Y" A, \2 t
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb: z6 ?7 X0 q7 r# R
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
- [! P3 U0 C0 |the newfie would l ...
) Y" |0 `- I( {* b

% ?9 e6 R5 H5 v& _0 k( @
% m/ x" E2 m. o( ?8 t好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:7 M+ W) \; C7 k# n
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,  h& r/ N, a- K6 G
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 8 m+ c2 b9 d. C
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
6 G8 k$ j- h/ k* ?+ G5 d0 ^
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
* x0 ]5 S# J: T& r5 V: L, w: f' j8 V& O% ~
3 u/ T8 Q; ^( V4 |1 r

! d1 E; d- q2 }  @% g# @$ [1 p好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:5 r; @/ i3 y/ q2 z
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
+ ~: p* r9 k" Q/ s$ l# T好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
, ?# n8 v! w, x6 h/ n  f2 ]
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
/ P/ X3 ^$ e# x6 Y, F
2 p; n! ]0 ~; }2 }) D真聪明,偶像啊
( R3 Y  Y7 S1 N. Z6 o6 O* I

% O4 g2 \! x- U0 d6 j1 h全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
+ b; x) u2 u  k# X# W
8 }* v* g" q$ }4 A& T6 A
6 C+ s8 P; w: g' P全盘接受一下。
6 x3 M# s" }, c" t
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 " s8 e+ I* [8 [
3 a/ T0 m" T; o: n8 r
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
2 F/ P& B# j4 b- O/ ]( l. m# f5 W: G

' v+ s* j2 z7 N9 {$ K8 h6 v% W3 p& k! u" @9 m2 r" C$ A( _
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 1 l+ t- g, I/ b+ J

1 [9 [6 s0 u* _# m; A% i7 q
$ L9 ~* B8 j( U6 t' \  n3 B& C7 U8 g9 G1 j. w8 a, ^
别把我往坏路上领啊。

/ P7 J3 x0 ^: P( ?' F0 l' L& o: O3 t5 |你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 7 I+ @; @8 i* v. {
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

8 a) O% q. O1 q$ _) v3 j0 \; Y; A多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
; {! @. c6 ~$ A. V* ?
, J0 [! g/ X+ u% j真博学,偶像啊。
6 {: ^; R8 @! a2 p0 S
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 6 p2 C: r9 d# M* i& P1 {
( _! x0 W4 b. k! B( Z
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
) a# f+ f1 B# K! q/ R3 L( r4 x; ~
她是大学教瘦?1 I: f# V  s9 H  C: X  F
大学教胖还差不多
( o& j8 |: D7 s$ t, U她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
5 j/ Y1 P3 E% i; g紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

+ C7 k8 k6 F3 d8 ?, d& H8 y0 X说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
3 F# h  L9 ~' S9 G6 M& D紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
  u. S0 q, d5 ?4 H( v
8 u  v8 g& |4 F2 ?
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-9-20 12:11 , Processed in 0.255933 second(s), 28 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表