埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 5883|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a2 J# i- w: D' b
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb4 M9 ~( b9 Z/ I% t8 D8 Z& \* N+ z
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if/ c6 ~  Z' I0 g! \$ q6 Q
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
2 X" z% F. p/ t2 d4 o  
8 S) S. [& m6 T4 L3 u" ?" B8 x$ d+ { The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so5 z  N; K3 _2 B' c2 A; Y  ]
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
5 w4 w: S' l* z9 ^ lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I* w: w$ W1 L5 _+ u+ Z/ D4 J
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,0 I; }1 F# Z9 B
you pay me only $5. ! ?' y) d2 a$ n* [) A/ |/ o

1 n; i" s+ B8 J0 D You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
; E1 y& j% W- c+ L: V3 X will pay you $500.
! i2 ^8 \, ^4 Q% ^' A
. T' q+ W4 l# ? This catches the newfie's attention and to keep5 o& l) @6 d1 x- j! D
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
: U' G8 ^) r! M) Z: K0 K2 }2 [3 p0 R0 y2 [
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's8 d% }$ {: M) g0 r7 X7 o$ K
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ' I) O- G1 a9 ]: C3 D
, S4 G4 F/ E6 w7 d* L
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his! ]: w0 C$ v& q! ^7 o- V
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the7 {8 S3 p3 m' j6 M
lawyer.
+ M- L0 O2 U6 L: Q; \0 l3 Y4 d
& E8 F$ w6 Z1 Q6 C9 _3 F% CNow, it's the newfie's turn.
$ ?1 z% E; j$ R9 R  z& K7 k$ ^5 H  _  O& Y& S7 n
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with6 W% ]) A; }' \5 W+ f6 U
three legs, and comes down with four?' # c' w/ {5 F& [0 e- p9 E9 x2 @3 W9 r

. i: J9 A; V/ `0 a" \! d/ GThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all( b9 H4 x. {2 i5 F) g
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all: Z; h  S, ^! A6 p! k+ V) E4 ?
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour( [7 g1 z" P# Y
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and# i3 [( @8 p7 M5 @+ n; k3 \, c+ S
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
7 K/ d1 w2 J- [1 Zback to sleep. 9 n" W, G" [* e4 H5 Z
' a+ r( p" n* q  u) [2 k
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
7 A: n4 R! h+ R3 B6 A) A# mwakes the newfie up and asks, / A0 i/ r: C9 I: C" f8 ^
) R' V* {5 f5 K( M
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
* t- S8 {/ B/ p8 @comes down with four?' + c1 Q9 f9 o8 M) R

: X% V( r8 o6 b3 aThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
$ S8 E+ g6 ]0 M) Mand goes back to sleep.
+ V0 {1 d! |6 q4 J, f+ Z* N" l3 n" y2 P' l) a, P  N1 D
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!) q, o6 U% K- j2 O9 o; M
# ?6 Y4 D: q; \( K5 ?, f
Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the: N& y# l' U- _! T0 |7 L
2 A9 n# v. u' ]1 @3 l4 G
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two ( ^' K+ q2 Z0 p1 Y9 N/ f2 T# R' r! M
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
9 u4 ]4 E6 R9 i( h>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the $ h" s4 o# B" E+ \
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, & ^" \1 x$ Q, c/ _% ^
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
9 B& Q. F9 o1 x! D) {+ e6 Y$ w5 M5 ~, y
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
. d) x: j  V$ [3 i% u* L' [. D>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
4 X6 \$ Y7 Y+ t>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more ! ]$ R9 v8 p) [& Z+ |
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
4 f0 ?5 Q+ r' K" K/ w* g" T' R) G>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three$ r! Y. z4 D" t1 M& [

: w$ N) a$ u- U6 Y, ^>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ' F+ k; ^' ~5 V3 D# \$ z$ Z' ?) o
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
. f$ l' h" [  s3 j$ u* J2 z>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand . i, H+ D3 g! y  w
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 6 C% d$ k: i: \* K4 I4 Z# M* G
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
& i  |' _6 K% Y% E5 d+ Vlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
1 c# G  |" Z6 j, Gthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if+ a: x2 H, r$ Z/ }, [" t' {
the newfie would l ...
. T) ]! w1 P" m* B  q6 w6 u

+ P. `- b& }6 B$ h$ l% M
- ~& ]. b2 B3 U  `4 m8 W2 w2 u好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
* l3 I2 W. {) s“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
8 S3 o2 u, B4 ]/ F' |' Y好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 % z! u' c6 A5 C  C
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
& h. x" V% a8 H% M0 Q  X
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 . ?& N* ~( R, E+ q3 @& M
9 \. s8 Z( J4 }1 d$ n" V

5 J* {  b& z" E6 m- M$ G5 x
" o) S  m4 e7 K: x* D0 x+ y好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:  R# U4 ?  p3 K. |8 h/ H* x
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,1 X  D8 l  Y9 Z
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

3 a+ x$ q7 s9 b; y& }3 O真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
7 L+ L4 i5 n" ]6 x: v( ~. D/ \5 G. T4 D
真聪明,偶像啊
! E& r) \- _- |: r4 T  W' E1 y
. n8 s- y; {9 t3 D9 ?. a% e4 t6 Z
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ! x: k5 f0 @) ~

6 P; Z) |9 w; l  R. l" W4 t) Z3 C- @3 v. Z7 M: O
全盘接受一下。
* i& q1 E2 Y; I& n) x
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
; V0 g3 i# P# u0 H0 [# P: N/ P1 {  E1 {& L  Q
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
$ ?. S3 |+ {+ C# }
$ m+ _' o" O5 H3 l; ^! e

$ M) P  n: w# Z3 C: }; B别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
. Y& X0 o% v3 [9 v$ x; j+ t0 G/ ?6 V7 y8 E. H

$ r; ?( H! L) s6 V' k3 o# g
5 Q' y$ K+ L/ Y. S- A+ U8 f别把我往坏路上领啊。

' C; @' s9 I% s& u你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
. m0 ^* ]) r# J1 K" Q, L加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
' F( \4 N' J8 w( e7 f, d2 u2 Q
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
: l4 I0 ?! y( {: u# W! I% @* `
4 o/ N  x. f4 @, o; B. s真博学,偶像啊。

* {7 [- M; p5 ^9 T6 C  i, j大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
" A8 r/ M% o5 [) e
( H3 b4 W& H  J% i7 B/ h' }大学教授哦,能不剥削?

' q! }+ F; ^6 X" i她是大学教瘦?
1 g8 T9 s8 I& X0 _' t大学教胖还差不多
  A7 h5 T2 X% _0 Y5 t她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
# E4 n- j, E) ^6 P/ q1 |: L6 M紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
5 _/ p, ~  k2 g) p. k( \- V* M* J, R
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
' n; L# C& A$ g紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
1 n9 S( Z$ @: }0 w. D
% u4 x8 i  n' k8 V2 \8 o4 n. B* q/ i
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
大型搬家
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-8-19 22:58 , Processed in 0.924213 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表