埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 6073|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a  A0 ^& x" R$ g8 ^0 z6 x
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb% L) e7 h6 u8 n* k7 [: |
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
' I6 n/ q. O; r& [* Bthe newfie would like to play a fun game. 5 Q/ m- z6 y7 e+ d( o
  # u) f" o0 G' H- U' o4 u# w
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so: }9 ]$ T8 v* ^9 J( l0 h* R; M  A# F8 e
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
8 X0 r( p9 q# K% P: c lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
6 j1 P; d3 L7 T; M9 s1 sask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,& @# Q6 X4 h+ ^* c- B# {  O9 U
you pay me only $5. : D! q9 `  h- n% T: M# L  V. ]

9 w+ g. `* [* t2 ]" N4 h You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
9 ~1 s' u, [: R6 ^$ E/ _$ J will pay you $500.
$ N( f2 |# f! i$ o3 j6 p9 V 5 A' n3 v& y/ A0 K2 l
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
! z8 y: y& D, U& Othe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
- ?8 J; v5 F( G. z" T3 {/ X% V0 F" L2 e
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
1 E: ~, T6 L' c3 M5 {# ^# d, f" Xthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
& c: f' y; ^" h5 W. i
- _2 g+ ^8 L+ G* q3 O+ b5 jThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his" d+ T. k) T- }" V
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the" p; p+ |) F5 p# A7 W9 m% y' Q0 x
lawyer. ( R8 W7 x8 I( w% ]5 g

; \( e9 Y9 n/ b* U5 h$ S1 K$ ~Now, it's the newfie's turn./ p. X& ]* {8 S
8 u7 W1 t4 ?5 W: X6 P8 W% R2 x6 O/ p
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with# x" G( P$ Q1 w$ g% k& u
three legs, and comes down with four?'
7 S! B' j/ k7 Z+ H  [, a1 f
2 v  N6 q. T7 L3 N) D* ]) eThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all' k% \$ J' U9 i' i4 w2 b( j
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all: ]; a4 j3 W8 R; ^; Z
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour+ ?+ B  y3 d3 k) a  F0 @' O
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
& T, V1 l9 _3 d: {& w; Dhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right" C2 x! {2 m( ?5 I
back to sleep.
! q+ A' s5 g' X& \, _1 M
9 `) B" \; Q. UThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
$ v2 O0 V. @- vwakes the newfie up and asks,   J/ T: o. k+ Z- t$ _5 R8 B# I
. P( x7 q$ E# r1 [) g# A$ v/ `
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and0 T7 b% P/ P1 {6 {4 n  I( k6 g! h
comes down with four?' 3 G. z5 }& X& Y% Y4 v/ L
* H6 O, R4 E0 s
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
8 [2 Z& w: d+ D' E" F* `$ i) T5 kand goes back to sleep.
2 k9 l9 R  a  @
( @9 q) K+ N1 N8 g2 e0 D
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!- H% I- }: \$ Y* E3 C- L- a

* r7 K$ H  v+ e' b3 [, K$ Q  }Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
3 h& j. y# C. e  _4 f& ]) S
* T1 M% ]0 g; @. i+ H# e>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
+ j5 B) |4 Z. [: y7 {" k>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
$ \3 f( A8 f+ Q: A; v! a>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the 7 Y  {! ?, t: t
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, + |6 `6 N' I2 z: _: f6 e
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
$ P$ R3 E2 s" n4 Y" w: y9 r& }
5 X! W6 [+ {7 }1 e4 r( e4 Y% p" P& C>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 6 F" p+ H8 E$ u
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 7 G. \# w) A1 W' S. A& f; y- j
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
4 B! L( r6 ?/ r0 F% |>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
$ I/ {' a% f1 \/ F& |1 j>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three: Y* A- `7 m8 v
6 a3 S! @( X0 x0 _  Y& \
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
! J& v2 G1 `2 y7 W>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the / f4 z; f$ E! ]8 C3 s; K$ d) Q# \
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand : }  i) G; R9 r$ S0 {" {4 S0 N
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
3 ?9 m! i- Z' w' p* v. z2 KA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a' l7 C( v3 E: M( ^
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb' g# m& Q8 P- o
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if5 W3 l- k$ w  l; e! o2 j5 U7 r
the newfie would l ...
* }, O7 h' I" L& B4 |7 p

$ e( [' ]: B2 z- Z9 C: v: n
1 I) o6 j+ A3 z5 }5 t# o9 W; `好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:- _4 o# l+ t2 z  ]
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,; G: E% k- Z$ t, C: c5 U
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
9 c; r% V4 [' {* k6 `加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
  _/ ?# q- I7 m/ {5 P
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 4 l9 ?3 T! w: I0 b
" j' `' F; x( N6 L6 n1 Y+ Z" O! ^4 Y
9 J" j4 w" K& K9 k& n5 V: x
% U) L* V& x6 ~* m  P% Q
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
. e. e- c1 b0 a6 v“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,: ~' u, J  u2 \4 e
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

! y; W+ r4 _2 J- [真聪明,偶像啊
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 8 x) ?8 o6 @  c4 J. m

/ z2 y. c; Z- W, ^" a! o真聪明,偶像啊

, ]; S1 Z9 z1 X, W; R) b1 W& F9 w, b5 S+ v3 g6 t4 u
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
" q* x4 {# y  i8 k6 y# D; z
: `! d5 D3 e5 D8 Q, n0 [
2 z8 b8 p9 c! k4 [/ _全盘接受一下。

6 |( {3 T( `  U5 s6 c5 R3 }: u+ P真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
0 n9 A( j) C6 {! P$ V# U% l, K7 \8 V- s% ^0 k- G1 ?
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
( u2 m* @& M: v) \0 O
( s+ k* G- s8 `' q" K

/ m& |0 z* e1 P0 ]7 O别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 0 g9 H$ O) ~- C( s4 K% P

2 w# L# u, O# k9 ~, ^; s- I! d  }. S) v

2 T6 v# Q+ H5 T9 F: P) t别把我往坏路上领啊。
8 Q2 r3 B; F. m8 M$ |
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 9 @% o( Z5 V5 g- [
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

( r) J$ C0 V8 Z. U: ~: S- Y9 N多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 4 |- e2 ^* A9 G- K" E: M
5 X( \: S# h3 ]" U. n& H) o
真博学,偶像啊。

" W' E6 x/ f. \2 B/ y大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ( Q( U! R$ \" ]: M
5 x  w7 u' _; E' x, _6 u
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
% |, S' S  l( b3 o2 S* X2 O; J
她是大学教瘦?
9 X2 j% k$ y* \大学教胖还差不多
  s% E" p: G+ ^+ z, S她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
" e, l0 U6 N; x8 N$ `紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
4 L- Q0 v. f; Z" E' {
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 * f8 S0 e$ m- e. g5 m- a
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

7 b! Z( A/ b8 q5 ^" t9 T& [0 f& W) ~1 _6 Q( B7 |7 \7 n
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-9-11 00:38 , Processed in 1.939680 second(s), 28 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表