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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
1 G& X% T4 Q  ^$ o4 @' |long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb$ h7 E% E0 W0 J3 `
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if' A  j4 \# B% ?9 v3 L/ A# r
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
6 E: d+ b) c- M. e5 y' ^  ' O* X2 u6 N& _' U
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
$ }3 c1 {! g8 V. V& E" v0 B6 j( M he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The+ t/ ?3 X/ q$ s
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
7 X. A* {* P" U- kask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,5 ?$ ]" |* O# v- \/ }4 D* B. T0 z' O
you pay me only $5. # f$ o! x  Z# m7 m: L
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I" z/ k% ]! Z4 F$ ?6 d& m% X
will pay you $500. - b0 Z- X" a& R& s5 o$ V! R

7 S; Z, N* @3 O$ N: m3 n This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
7 e  b4 ?1 V8 P3 \& m  H) }3 [the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ' o1 m8 U7 O7 \9 ]+ m0 b; @& f

* a$ [+ ~6 T. g2 hThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's( j+ O3 j" m1 f  M, Z+ h# d! ~
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ' z( ]: `% x7 @
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
: X' ?  T; t; t2 Apocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the, E0 L+ y9 b0 c" n: Z7 U. w
lawyer. . t' a2 J8 M) }8 Q0 g

. j3 }! E( O* INow, it's the newfie's turn.
+ O9 {* [$ K0 N" f2 R4 T
; M0 r% w7 {0 W8 W8 t. mHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with8 a+ Q% T' l4 @- R1 ?) q) h
three legs, and comes down with four?'
9 S) |. H+ y' D& J9 C
& n- A4 f4 y8 [2 WThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all5 t: E/ }1 U5 O; y+ L; o
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
3 A# P; q- J, Q- G. x: Qthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour$ J: P+ |3 x* M+ f* M3 f
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
- J2 R5 |' ]# ~3 ~hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
) r& l9 Y, N: U" k2 tback to sleep.
* e, Y; @4 C3 Y& m) z
. L7 u0 k8 `( h! p/ W& CThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He4 U7 K% a) ]$ Q: H- \6 ]
wakes the newfie up and asks,
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'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
0 H  C2 @1 j1 zcomes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $51 l3 t6 o- Z, N' r$ i9 q# U
and goes back to sleep.* k* `+ t2 i! C

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!3 M# i  X* e# T2 @. F/ T. F

1 R: z; @# m8 L; O) JLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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7 T4 a# S+ Y4 y, W, }$ @>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two & l4 j" y5 ^& Z( i# [6 [4 g
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
" A- r% R, ~9 R; h" ]6 V$ O9 Q9 ~# m>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
+ k# k3 B! P3 ~8 {9 H: W" r( S>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
* v0 h) D6 y& x! U- X- n6 Z6 f3 [% E>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct, J( I9 T; Y; |: g' Z: n

, r; H  q6 k! F* p) w>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research ; {) f' g5 F5 [
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
4 }- ~* h4 \( P# Z  a& |>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
& n! H7 S3 O0 ^, y+ @! M. A>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, . k/ }  ~: G) g% t5 ]
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three* U) G* W0 d/ l+ D0 n' \7 b' N
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's # V  `$ q3 |7 u" |! S
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the : @' _: p* X% ]6 V! _( T
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 9 a+ B5 x- }" T6 \3 s/ H3 j
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 5 R# T+ ^1 O% e  i, t
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
: H( e+ ]- E9 c- W9 Flong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb5 G7 p! B8 [2 F2 W* V, J* J
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
/ l9 Y  K1 y) T1 j, Nthe newfie would l ...
) Z' _7 E2 A7 a$ Z  G: E9 B

4 y/ W0 L; I8 d  Q
1 {/ ?+ B$ h! [# _0 Z好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
( x2 b- u" A4 I( j0 w3 W! U4 A“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
( e- ]! b7 G% D' u, f& I* c1 u好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ) x7 Z* f4 P* @, a4 w4 c% k7 C
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

) G6 d. ?: ^* v" I0 n# U真博学,偶像啊。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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; y: V* {' N+ P2 R% }  q. n! q+ D. @! L. U; K4 ~1 ^, G9 H

! F7 O7 w* P, y' G" \好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
. T# Y! a2 j  X" H“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
/ Y3 `3 F& E  m, E* p  {好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

2 n# z3 Z8 M9 D$ l8 g: I真聪明,偶像啊
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表   L; W/ d) Z9 `4 x7 J+ z* X! W5 N
$ j0 X3 |- Y( b5 Y' ?7 t$ j$ L
真聪明,偶像啊
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: Q9 u' J9 U; J- u8 j5 g
全盘接受一下。
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发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
" }3 _3 T; M: v9 o
6 Y* d# r7 P. {, r
& z/ `- j) P$ P' ?2 d全盘接受一下。

1 j, u) B: T) t9 t& P: G9 a真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 9 |& m5 C  [2 }" m& Y
4 |. M/ e( s6 @# O# n+ y6 ^! i
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

4 r& m2 \4 p! t" L* s; W- n8 E$ H6 Z6 I# i6 ~: H. O' ^9 ?

6 j" T  F- o2 H$ |: m# P; U' G别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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9 \, m" n7 ]" p  a

6 A: {8 J; e* w' x别把我往坏路上领啊。

( M* x: {: L  c你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
9 J, e+ D4 T& K9 v; k8 a加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 0 Z) O7 [9 U* s4 ?) _% Z

2 ?5 O" [! B( a8 Q真博学,偶像啊。

% H# m. g. c: K# }3 K大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?0 }5 I' \0 ]! [$ W
大学教胖还差不多
9 s2 X# m: k* k' O3 j4 N7 ?她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 4 R! `/ B2 l6 T3 F. g
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
. @8 L8 B1 x2 o. |% |紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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9 h7 @/ Y9 [* M) a0 m5 @* W
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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