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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a  L% ~6 d* ]( r. O
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
# O: p% I3 @4 L" W1 Cthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if( X  I2 h8 `; |8 c
the newfie would like to play a fun game. & V8 r3 }: ~! R& T; w6 S: m
  * R8 G" |* _. h) Q- u- ]
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so8 P8 r% V  ^* a7 k& K& r: z; E
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The6 m1 p0 ]2 c* z4 w! ]% @3 q
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I2 ?9 I3 n# }. a: G# G& z5 W6 _
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,, g0 R: G. Y8 x
you pay me only $5. & h! V4 M0 V4 {& X  K9 f6 f
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
' c/ L* G6 _( h  m7 h: ^ will pay you $500. - ~) ?: r1 D) Q8 h! D
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep: T9 R' p1 b: G
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 6 t* o3 P0 A0 B& o/ P6 L
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
* r$ }/ s% a" v8 rthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
) W. _7 t' p3 w/ ~6 m6 o1 \pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the# e! j& @; w* {7 N2 t2 R& \
lawyer. / R7 @' v# O/ t1 x
  y  G. [- l: C  s: [
Now, it's the newfie's turn.' E; ^% J9 d* d& h" q
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
8 m! l: M! L$ B$ J* pthree legs, and comes down with four?'
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- L; n( s5 x. A- a7 tThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all" V7 T( |: ?2 N3 m. u+ U4 C. J
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
6 {$ N( z: O, \- v6 G0 Y. mthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour+ J+ I+ d8 F0 m: l# f
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
+ ~2 n% J* t2 \3 |- Y% L+ Ghands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
( A* S: k: L& G, h. oback to sleep. ' p! X$ q4 K! F8 |2 b5 Z  z( K5 w$ H
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
: w! J$ j& v; b% ^wakes the newfie up and asks, # d3 z2 x. A8 }& {% ^/ v
* C! I4 V/ ?' Z$ h) H* g( R
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and7 o( e+ l% {, S9 }+ @
comes down with four?' / Z- u3 H+ [0 Z* [8 C' }5 n

2 ^5 y9 ~: n7 I/ P- e# gThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5% y. ?2 ?, c0 k& J
and goes back to sleep.  \9 C$ l" x, Z2 P8 n

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
9 }9 A7 v8 l. `1 U& r8 v0 ^; i% f# Y0 G+ m* K4 P0 Q
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
$ K3 }, [$ `/ d8 ?0 G! P; O>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason / f) \/ ^+ ?' Q" p. k. y
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the * m" N% W' M9 b: ?- T8 E
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, - Z" ]$ F! R+ ]3 f  G0 `4 P- V
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research . g  W3 k# i! i1 l* f* I
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
  y) X) l2 o7 c) i$ m9 W) |>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
0 d6 d) W, g2 f. b6 B( z>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
% s+ }# n! D+ ^0 c* i: m4 Z>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three( F, i0 o+ \' o+ L, M+ [' ?7 K9 h; g
! \2 E2 X0 ^" p- M; m  l% v
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
2 p" q+ {1 y  p& b8 @! k>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 6 G  q9 q! U. z% |5 ?
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand / m8 V8 K+ Z( |
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 - L" P; R8 h1 Y+ W0 l
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
2 ?/ S" e, U: u! F" b: z4 olong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb; J  M% V# ]1 k5 y- b- l
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
0 r- m6 p7 d# X3 m. y$ \the newfie would l ...
, E) O% }5 o2 K5 ~
, }* t9 _! F9 Z

: M' U' Z7 J- x" B好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
: W% I/ [( _: A/ O8 a4 h“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
& |8 o& ?- Z5 k0 q好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
9 Y0 o& R9 T& _6 V/ E' k; k4 b+ [" l加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

; P3 z" `' t: q, c4 c% N真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 6 |, H7 B- @3 ^9 p. \  f) t3 n

1 W5 Z; h8 Q; R: n  v4 U: ]. K# F( _6 @, n

6 c% U, z+ f4 l& r2 P( |$ R  d% t" ]好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
( \8 i3 b' n& o( K8 g2 x' ~“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,3 R: L. m' R/ r9 P
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
4 m: }6 @7 a+ t& g9 ]
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
% o6 }: a7 l8 h) c9 Z
0 Q) I' {' N: f( w真聪明,偶像啊

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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 * n  q" `) ~+ f

# W  }  a. i/ k4 |: l- J/ p8 c) t% h" B
全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
/ f$ F1 @% P5 \0 J" ]0 C' ?
; }  I& \" U$ {5 w. [  n7 U7 f( ?真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
. P) p+ H# T3 U/ W) r

% Y7 y$ w8 L; i& _9 f! @4 p$ C0 A1 c& X6 Y
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ( T2 ^; t. ^& o9 t+ x
. n8 I' h3 f8 p$ K$ d1 y6 `% r

( v2 s0 I, C- Y& L1 R+ Z  {' C
. @/ k, J2 _. \) D+ ^+ R" v  s别把我往坏路上领啊。
- ]; p6 k0 J/ S6 @& U9 _' \% q: p
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
  u1 Q; D# y, \7 a) F2 @' s, k加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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8 g; k4 L9 m- h) }: H真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ' `3 K5 }# S* u- j* X1 L8 V
+ B/ {. L9 r( {0 g) ^* S% T" h. F" r
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
3 t0 m6 {* o& J5 D- V4 n$ L
她是大学教瘦?
7 N- L2 P' n7 h" S8 l9 [# Z, {大学教胖还差不多
7 }- ?/ F( I- \1 P她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
5 T4 Z5 [+ |- Z  \2 i3 T7 i紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
2 G7 [3 \" d2 n% L+ t# ~
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
4 k# x* G8 q& B3 i$ f: E" x紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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