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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
7 X8 o; l& P9 v9 Ylong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
+ {$ x! C' M5 G8 Hthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
- D3 w! [0 w/ W, I; }, T0 T4 ]the newfie would like to play a fun game.
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6 A) w: a  n$ c* S/ {5 R, l The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so. u* a& ]" s$ X0 r% J
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
# ?8 ^( @0 Q" X6 }0 c$ f lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
' L  c" A5 {- Y* M* w' ]) rask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,# H3 f% D. V! g3 U  U) N
you pay me only $5. # U9 z$ q, u9 ?/ b, O9 T. D3 N- g" {& \
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
6 ^+ l( b; z" G% R& o will pay you $500.
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" N, L1 M2 J0 o! K This catches the newfie's attention and to keep  \5 {& D' A; Z9 J8 i, d
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
4 Y$ D: T! e( r5 u  E( J! }8 \
8 s, {- u/ r2 q/ X+ U" x3 A3 ?The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
# q1 A2 c3 t, m7 j& Ethe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' $ h' [/ g1 R  b! l9 J7 d, a2 j

$ H' c* k1 [3 W) w' L+ MThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
8 }! w6 H' O( x! M" Upocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
7 e5 J2 C2 F& T6 q( Q  e4 u& S( @lawyer. $ {' M% e$ W8 z2 |& w9 R

* J3 Q( H+ ]) T1 K0 r! e' uNow, it's the newfie's turn.
( [  o9 J) r2 B( ?6 d# J
0 f% c. k/ h2 p! _0 U" |$ N+ M4 oHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
+ ^( H$ c( r  O3 R- mthree legs, and comes down with four?' ! \1 V! L$ C5 t9 v( X6 c+ F% H, K. s

3 m; V! b8 k" E+ PThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all/ v* F- I3 C) Z* ?# N
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
% j  E: d) \0 j1 ^2 b; Tthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour3 k9 ^1 S$ W' v- o- T/ c) M) n
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
& N. p! S7 t& d4 u& }4 X7 Ehands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right" w" k6 i" g( o0 K4 v  I2 }
back to sleep. & S, V, X- X" V$ x5 w  z
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
! ]: V' ^1 {" O5 Z* {wakes the newfie up and asks,
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'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
/ C0 P( Q5 f( L" E6 G% j2 ?comes down with four?' $ ~8 p" A% p5 a  B& I# r1 X

! H9 L2 s2 _1 v5 H, I. Y- \The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
+ ~: n+ Y2 M' f! g7 yand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!1 l$ ^: |" }" P& m# L$ y

9 n" x6 N6 }2 y7 V! N3 T! F  bLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 0 U! k5 [4 S' O' G& u1 x, p
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
. d3 W) m5 }" X9 j) k+ Z$ T# G4 v>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the & b, z. S& c3 }  ~0 h0 q3 D( K
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
' D* \! \1 V6 w) p( O>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
/ }; E% L3 C: }
' u- \8 U6 ]7 S: L, o/ j>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research $ {, ]' M5 p! `7 {2 r- g6 U
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
$ c7 k4 E& I  v* i3 v  x& g) l' g>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more " A; D+ z# A$ i3 I
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, $ \9 t: a4 w- V8 C% c7 n
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three$ ~1 X4 }4 I% Z  G
8 @) X( r8 T( W( f
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 6 j+ S8 e. T+ G( L
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
& B4 b4 M3 `1 q/ N>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand ; w; C( Y* K% O  h
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
' Y' ]/ U* C1 EA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a5 R& g5 E" _  Z8 @7 a& ?4 D7 Y
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
0 v6 J6 q4 }5 I' _  }+ A; R3 L' X5 `that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if1 S* p' B1 @! d- [& t4 u( c
the newfie would l ...
- ^  e: J3 T; o& k; j; z, [9 ]

! M$ Z6 Y$ R7 r2 L+ q2 k5 i8 e% I) Q6 T" R
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
: L5 z2 ]' o0 h0 o; q9 Y2 h7 ~6 e  _“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,6 U' Y/ [2 z( r+ U$ [
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
; V$ _) t+ Q& b1 r2 ~加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
  ]! @, I4 o: l9 C
真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 9 C% q2 x8 ]% S! z; z. ^; q
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0 k2 S* `- l( N) q2 c
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:- y7 K) {8 @7 a; ~1 f7 K8 @
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,7 x2 F4 l! i# ^1 b, V3 [
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
, w$ w+ K: `) x1 n2 c
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
6 V) E1 t  B0 `! m' P" U/ E0 M8 n1 j% r! n1 c. n1 ^
真聪明,偶像啊

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% d' y1 U+ T' u% U1 ]: d# k全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 , z) Y  l$ u5 X% a! {' Q
) c* D$ X# E* q3 z7 M) r' ?

0 r( ]$ ^: v* V  x全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 5 r; W8 k8 i1 `
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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别把我往坏路上领啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 7 x7 R4 N( y5 m

  O6 w! }+ U6 ^: o" B& ^1 Z, h
) [5 j  o- g6 a9 N1 m! Q6 t' y* q$ Y, Y  M7 F
别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
; A/ K0 E7 C9 G2 v! U  g: z& c* _: d加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

) T9 k# X$ z+ `0 o9 y  I多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真博学,偶像啊。
: E: B+ {$ D7 j, d) |+ G5 T4 f
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

1 @3 V' q7 R5 }. t2 r她是大学教瘦?
- q; K: q* f( B0 p+ r' \2 q7 W大学教胖还差不多
" b# {. ]8 T- _8 K- c她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
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发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
# u7 }" c3 z( }# ~, p紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
" N1 I! [+ G" Y* N# z5 l
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
7 @' J6 ^' L2 s! a5 V紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

6 h5 h* \% U: k8 Z
& R7 s( P, @7 ?  b1 [哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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