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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a7 v" i8 ^. x* v9 \8 B; \0 O
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb% o6 w/ q7 X; |, n. @5 k! A- t( N
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if5 x4 Q' o5 K$ V. o( u
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
4 x# O( k: q4 q$ ~8 r  
' O, }) K1 s  F1 P: K: I, Z; }) O The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
* i% f5 F' g: I  C( y6 M he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The7 s5 h+ d8 h+ d
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
1 L2 [# A/ @& T' ^  ~ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
$ H: M+ ?3 F( k- n2 T" Nyou pay me only $5. / f* T; K: b3 B. e4 A9 c1 K

" g; s# s6 l5 A8 r& @* {9 | You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
( k2 ~  l& t, B$ [* i9 [ will pay you $500. . Q( V9 G7 x% z+ o

3 a3 z5 B- h' I% j+ X This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
) q; i5 r$ h8 t4 t" R( }the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
- N4 j3 c+ R3 m9 n: ^1 y& _* n$ ~4 {+ t% J
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's: E) p% y  k" M: e( D  b: J
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' " E; H/ O% B$ z' c+ E) x/ k

' C* {% I& N6 ^, R3 L) W! ?2 eThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his* Z. e( E2 j6 ], ?
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the1 n( f4 K8 `2 r2 u) n6 X9 k9 ^
lawyer.
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with3 F% r8 i: r- q" U+ U* B
three legs, and comes down with four?' ' H& y* _8 ^) p" y8 V0 ~9 W# k

  [) F4 t( I) ~. GThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all9 r9 @" j3 d! q: Q
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
& F9 M6 a  W; |4 O2 fthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
+ f& f: L" P/ {- R/ zof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
  Y4 `0 R: w) W0 Nhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
$ N+ n$ \# n! M" d$ ?3 Mback to sleep. 9 d* s2 r& A( j3 S) ~, o( K
  W; Y4 L4 U" J* r! }
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He, w. a- I/ d8 J6 A+ x( z4 V7 @
wakes the newfie up and asks, 6 H. ^8 ^3 o9 C* }

) C/ i! v$ e8 m# R7 s8 [- V'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
; s  @( X! I- x) C; y% tcomes down with four?' ' d3 q+ D# K/ W$ B

1 T$ F5 E: f0 Y8 G! ~9 y6 UThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
5 J- }8 @1 _* uand goes back to sleep.) h9 z0 e2 [5 o" B9 D5 t0 ^

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!+ A, N2 o/ T( |. V. ?6 ]+ X
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the: d3 B" f5 W$ P. \  A" t! Z% a! u$ }
. y' `  F( [' A  b& G
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 6 A8 W# E7 ?- }/ `2 a7 \& j
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
$ i- t" N7 q, @0 a, j' @>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the % r$ k/ q2 [# O7 E
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ( P2 j1 Q; h) c
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
% O! w" ?4 V+ S! K9 @0 t$ f
; J3 [; B+ F* j; E3 g>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research - X3 Q, z- T$ w
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a $ G: D$ h: m3 x# b
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
. a- y6 _8 q+ Q1 U2 _; m0 V>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
& O$ |  n7 u% ?; x$ b. J+ w>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three6 P% o  b2 j, G5 X

: E  E8 b1 O. a. G5 G>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
. Z  B8 r6 r. n+ d+ G4 {5 @8 U>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
" B; u. h1 B- p+ i; h>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
, z6 V$ c3 S( k* ]- U>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 / y; p: W! d; p
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a, J, K/ Z, j$ o( w  k, h; |
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb5 [% p3 _5 |/ A: H6 t8 N
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if9 ?8 J% Y; [" y% ^6 \1 }) y4 O' I
the newfie would l ...
! S( `, F1 j. y, x2 Y7 P( ~

, D7 ?/ U# H* W6 e9 R5 \+ ]) _9 B9 h$ E6 |  p
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
3 J0 u; z+ N& K2 q$ N! R9 ?“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,0 g# I3 }/ |$ ^2 ^
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 3 p1 B, C" c* H
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

0 G* `% t0 `4 }6 Q9 n* a3 P; v4 K$ C真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
, c# R: n( \" z  J+ d7 c
* S6 r; h) f1 z7 L$ b. l5 Z2 v1 L' `: }( v5 |5 f$ e

5 Y5 e+ d8 P6 w- R好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
$ r% Q) P% A* F7 [7 b3 Z- P“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,  U9 X% o; y. e4 w# r, i! c  x
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
5 U  ?8 z1 F8 h, h( i
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 : U% y& \& Y' B# y2 }

# n4 x4 T! k3 k真聪明,偶像啊
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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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5 y, o9 B( ]) j, F: L6 I& I+ N, p9 \3 \3 z
全盘接受一下。

6 w2 p+ ~- C* @* O真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
$ C2 M9 f. N. }# X! T+ n. S$ ~
: i0 x1 X( Y1 ^0 R0 j' i8 r: L真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
* v6 A8 k, f" j
. D- M# M" j& u* I$ B3 q
3 k5 v+ L& Z" p
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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% }1 o0 F; {0 t( j

; }4 P5 i: A; A+ M" a别把我往坏路上领啊。

. R; c. e7 f2 M. |1 R你已经在路上了
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 / d5 ]1 A8 W  G% I. O2 \5 w. ^2 X9 p
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

! I2 [# d8 A, i; w7 @  ^( e多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ! u; P% R7 Q- y  [- a
, t) X/ z! R& g3 R3 l/ \
真博学,偶像啊。

! D4 O# }" e5 c大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 0 f" Q9 a  }$ J- V

) v) p4 C) Z( F' j# J* b大学教授哦,能不剥削?

$ l0 C6 g* ?8 O- m4 K& g7 u她是大学教瘦?8 l5 D- p4 S; Z* v
大学教胖还差不多
0 m' q0 \# a3 [" @/ x. y她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
6 ^+ c( C7 a+ l" G) Y0 b紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
: X& S* B: o: O& p1 O7 z; @
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
* s* a2 z& B: W& O5 B5 V紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

. \8 F  H" g( L- w3 y6 e% O# B
# \$ y- N8 a) ?6 E. w; Z; i  ?哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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