埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 6159|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a# t( m4 n0 }! i7 ]7 E; b3 u5 `
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb6 K# i3 j8 r: U1 p
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
, ~2 z4 [, ?$ j) F' athe newfie would like to play a fun game. ' T. E# ^7 o- I
  7 V6 S- s/ F' N& @% ~
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so+ z6 o. r. W9 d% H8 A0 {* z9 a( C  F& r
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
( i0 [( z+ j; l; o9 {& h lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
+ A0 L8 o8 b; |7 g% A( jask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
1 [* n  e# `' Nyou pay me only $5.
! [! j: Z  p  c- ? : `, L5 v1 I6 m, V( {# C& _4 w
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
* X- S1 E3 V/ L: O# k8 x4 R+ y/ ] will pay you $500. ! s" h5 N7 V+ \5 R9 G  P
8 ~; o4 `6 F9 |
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep6 v! J8 v' P+ S1 o  R2 S
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
, Z# w/ G, z. [; m' U+ y+ k1 O. u
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
4 k7 }0 _" F% a! Mthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 4 {$ H5 E+ D8 i- j- r! s

: z5 X1 o+ v) K; BThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
9 C5 _( @3 T' V4 Y2 ~4 Kpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the- W1 m2 J, i' T/ L6 A  e& j
lawyer.
. Q, R( M6 V; D9 o
' o& N) c. z* I5 D, |Now, it's the newfie's turn.2 k; o! U2 F3 f+ P% ]8 w! _% o

, ]5 e. x; k4 D6 ^% JHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with  \; H+ g! v8 x: [
three legs, and comes down with four?'
% t1 U' t7 o$ L1 q9 L5 h6 e- _$ X1 E- V5 `6 M# O; g' [( e& `$ d- C/ Q/ i) N
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
$ G4 d. r6 d" k# B# freferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all3 ~' W; |1 l+ ?
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour" ~/ G: P* O6 G& c9 u8 M( ]
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
* ]' m1 ^9 d% I# g5 u' Bhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right. ~! h9 z- E2 V4 j3 T' B4 p1 B. l# Q
back to sleep. / t! `% N3 X: n) y2 c5 F

% q8 ^8 M6 t* I% a) P7 yThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
/ g! C1 ^& G' c$ |. ?wakes the newfie up and asks,
4 H( P$ ]: [/ T0 O1 W
( h; ]( ~9 v8 L; k'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
* b; a' N: u$ v& |5 G. l. n4 f' E  ^% Mcomes down with four?'
3 Q9 ^& y. {$ s2 N7 v% c
& Y& r! ?2 |7 U& J3 x/ qThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
+ ^# }2 \' d) ^2 s. A+ _0 [# n4 Aand goes back to sleep.- g- D2 a! z7 ~' _) O! A0 u$ e

, c  K; E+ w) p
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!$ c& }9 _; U, ?4 O+ A% }
! g' U: G8 k( @
Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
# x# ^$ ~- O, o, H1 v
$ p% ~% a' C! r- i  \>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
1 u+ {) y9 |  a9 ^* N9 V>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason : o1 h/ @* R5 ]3 W/ L
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
4 E' w! O4 H  ^( X4 `% Z; y+ |>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
' V9 D! q$ h( l>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct2 q" p( r( Q, }& e. y5 X. x

% `5 l* H* Q, d>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
" B+ {# Q' Q2 |$ N1 o- V, e" w>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
6 c' [0 V1 d' J>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
+ J% x: g& t0 B0 E* H1 S! c( [>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, % y8 D$ A. C( o6 V3 E
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three/ ]% z  P3 r2 J& e3 {2 ?5 o  r
: L  f; A& ]4 o! Y
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
! U1 v- Y. k0 C- Y+ e: d2 [% p>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
' x2 b0 \& K1 Q8 ^0 O; z" `>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
. p! E$ d, a3 X/ M$ \>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
! i. \% l: v2 e  ]- y2 f0 q, {A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a0 ^) }. H4 H$ w) h& Q
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb8 m: m: P: t. b" o) b: M
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
9 K( M5 W' |# i& i7 lthe newfie would l ...

4 k" x7 E8 F5 g5 ]+ a& X6 v; j5 s. Z( q9 D
0 [" A! t  P! b8 T$ W% X5 O# u
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
8 c# J- Y. y& s* y0 H3 Y“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
' s1 x, u" F8 D- e& J/ X( ]4 t% B好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
) {' W+ ~- [5 S$ L1 K/ B加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
: D3 {0 g# z6 ?+ N. z* G+ O$ j
真博学,偶像啊。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ! E( E; r* K' ~( E- i, D6 t, [
  C; C( i! S  y0 r. K+ f

) e2 [, ]- L5 s5 J7 y1 Q( x' N8 b: _) C6 Z& }
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:' p$ I* ]: _% [. p% ^
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,; L) M7 ^# e$ E/ `
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
9 S* x* T( ^4 E2 E4 w5 J+ g
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ; u. B2 F6 r$ g- \! Y
" G/ c" E, |* U, F" @2 a
真聪明,偶像啊
$ K' f$ B6 t) M! A
* N4 ^& `# D1 k! [
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
* s2 f* Y) W/ R+ V4 t) R% U: ?# W7 b; n% d( [
. ~. C' d1 t" I$ W( K1 H0 Z3 L
全盘接受一下。

1 \6 T, l& m' Q& E) B. Z+ j真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
6 I" |1 s: Q$ _' A( ?5 ~6 ~8 R; q( l9 }8 t
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
/ {7 l9 M* j$ I" l

" o6 c" P' x' V# X9 [$ ?
6 O  F3 a6 p+ {  _) O3 X! [8 m5 [8 R  r别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
: W. y- f, S" p7 g8 T6 ~
, u: G& _4 G  x' V& @5 Y: O
2 h1 D' Z" }4 E
8 Y% \2 P+ c6 y别把我往坏路上领啊。

& t6 ]# g, y* S3 }% ^8 @3 F你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
7 h( x  a# q; ]4 Y! l- s, u加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

8 P6 |- t  m- F4 ^6 d多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
  v4 k8 ?* B, y% y' p% u: W# T# R" z& o, O4 l! ~& Y5 ^; F7 c% f
真博学,偶像啊。

/ ^8 S3 C5 r1 S! T; ?大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
/ B( i. ^$ `! S9 o( J8 o5 Y
# [. X1 M" t" C7 g7 H; b大学教授哦,能不剥削?
4 [1 [2 f/ k" y
她是大学教瘦?( N- g# s- m8 j
大学教胖还差不多 1 z7 P  m! o# y9 s# t- R! O% F/ L8 R, ?
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
( U5 R9 Z, O  d0 M( F  N; ]紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

! o/ @# n% o" G; u说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
5 L4 s1 ]8 C2 w6 W紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

) @) i* e( v7 K, _* z
7 P; r! F7 m* r9 g) I- |  O$ p哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-9-23 17:58 , Processed in 0.702426 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表