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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
6 A( D! _0 M  s5 Vlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
1 \. f4 B4 R4 I+ \- Ythat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
+ z7 _$ [2 Q! D  Kthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
3 K0 E  r: u1 g( ^: G  3 U  f1 L/ k: U% ?8 X! O8 k
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so1 ~7 P* A" c$ [7 E* v. e
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
5 D5 I( C% c& G+ E+ V lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I4 Q7 Z7 Z8 Y( N. r
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,* C: I* k  Y2 s) N( G7 }
you pay me only $5. 4 e% V+ o, z" E
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
* T# h# ~. j. I; R9 Z will pay you $500.
: j3 \1 I: R7 z  F
" f3 g3 F, t) E This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
! @" O; B) P8 l# S3 [the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 3 [- i( b# |' `/ N  w

- f# m/ S% p# v8 e- O. S! h3 HThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
; ]; Q: D3 s' t) s: c- ^the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
/ B& L: q: H. R- a
9 T( a' x' o& ^* o- @9 V9 ]% y% h% QThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
9 F0 B: u! o% |6 B2 E5 i7 upocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
' @) D: m0 I! `0 ]lawyer. 4 W  R- T2 V9 a, \6 v0 B( Z
0 Q5 u  G. g- \/ q4 g, y$ d4 S
Now, it's the newfie's turn.6 i2 I3 v7 }* ^$ E( Q+ B- F
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
, P3 q7 @# j$ f) m+ C- E, Othree legs, and comes down with four?'   n' N& ~) X6 Q- @0 B

: Y( [, m% z% {" ^The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
+ _5 ?/ {1 M4 g1 C' Hreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all2 H  b5 H3 n, c6 h6 I% |; \
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour& R8 I% \3 d3 T/ b
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and* i" l$ e$ I6 m8 b5 z1 ~3 r
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right! t& L8 ~5 D$ h+ {7 L2 w
back to sleep.
- M4 T4 s. i% i/ |% K$ c! c. h/ k+ ^1 \# Z" D8 \0 F4 \
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He# A( r' T$ Z" P8 ?* ]
wakes the newfie up and asks, . N$ z" Y# f; d" j" A

4 b/ L% i: @1 m* n0 a) T9 y7 ?'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and5 W( v  l' _( K# e9 P+ D& Z8 |
comes down with four?' 4 N' u' J, t: \& c" D
3 J" f4 }* O( Q% n
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5+ l+ G& v6 X. E/ u
and goes back to sleep." _; s% G) k( M  v, a

8 K- Z4 m/ G" `) `
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!8 u1 E" t9 l0 S% L0 }

$ U0 [1 L* J: \4 T0 o9 _, Y" RLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the% s$ q1 F/ K* G: K3 }+ X
. @) R$ v& s" ]+ B& L. r, n
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two * r% f, J7 p# T) n9 j( P0 z& r
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason * h6 E# Y! f5 }$ [$ W5 D
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the ) b* `, c7 ]  j& }0 O. ?# m
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, : p9 f% v2 ?& _2 m6 U4 h) k* m
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
* R$ Z# G0 E9 \. ?4 U: q( W' r7 Z) J- Z  f- m) u; |' r: b8 A
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
: g6 L# E( G  k  m% l>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
  ]- t1 @/ w  C7 {+ d2 ^2 o>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
+ |8 T$ j. B  \* P& P>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
, R  |0 ^; v7 U( g. U1 l>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
! e: Y, {1 C( ~" j! U
' L& m* {* x3 B! }% Y9 p>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
/ ~! `$ m7 v- i0 u>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the ) c( {, ~5 g. Y" Z. ^; O* H% j
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
% q. A3 w2 }* d- }" I5 k>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 1 s5 s8 a! ~9 c1 }
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a" N8 R; o& D3 V4 N4 N
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb: h2 D2 k9 k7 t$ [' E7 I- m, f
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if4 \- e5 z8 \0 @+ y* ?
the newfie would l ...

6 R' ~! `/ x' V& N! ?* T, g$ k7 X2 k6 x, Q* j

) ^. S, n: W( p  D2 Q+ U好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
0 ?/ U9 f5 F7 y- X+ F“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,+ Z- V6 {* T( B. I
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 6 j( V! d: [; O' X+ h
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

! {! F! Q& F/ X4 m) u真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 5 l/ K- }% a$ K3 m

7 n4 H& `/ G6 }! A) ]) b8 v+ \9 q+ Q& i7 G. v
- T. y) Q2 P( b# C" r0 G0 A9 F
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
7 s; O4 V3 O2 N1 l% I" |“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
& g3 E; X* H+ G好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

; Z/ L; ^- m2 x1 c真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
* k! u- b+ v- `
* M) j6 ~4 i9 j6 d: M真聪明,偶像啊

+ X  G" q: Q7 |0 Z, d, L
1 [/ z, l8 H1 |0 o全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ; [  ]" G" s$ u' X9 A8 o8 C
( Y7 x9 Z" y+ l" d  B+ V4 x

* p9 D, l  g# p1 e9 V& F全盘接受一下。
. m+ u6 `7 Y' F; S2 ]6 i
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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: E0 w+ `) g/ q" T3 I" t( }$ b* y! M* G* C* @  }
别把我往坏路上领啊。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 9 `& q3 H+ g; x# y& H: a! M8 y
: H! z6 _6 I0 c) b8 e3 \

8 h* m3 E( X1 @$ }
0 |+ l, ^7 N( Z4 Q( e: H" R别把我往坏路上领啊。
4 ?/ P! b3 Y1 Z
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 " e+ h+ B# l2 _$ o
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

$ W' [( ~6 D8 ?4 F多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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) }9 a0 e& \0 E$ w3 O  v" Y真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 9 V- r' [% k- c. C2 T! s
8 ^& m; W/ D  [% u1 S# r/ f
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

2 F7 z) v1 n; E她是大学教瘦?! t- U' j% J! A% |- W, b
大学教胖还差不多 # D) }! e7 U+ S: k) G+ @$ P
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 $ o6 R0 k" |) E& A! w$ }9 O  {
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 6 G1 W" @' u4 N
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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" @$ p% W7 z6 g' n5 v8 w7 x! M9 _/ Q哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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