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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a0 H) A) [4 Q6 v  ~" u
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb& j! ^. p$ G  S! n6 R2 f
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
9 g' Y6 n8 @9 m" X7 L" J) ithe newfie would like to play a fun game. # S1 \8 b' m  P% b0 }. v
  
% ?6 ?& O; G* |1 j8 ?& T8 G The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so3 G4 [/ S" `9 i
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The* w" A/ |( x& S! t; R, V+ @
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I2 v% ^" Z4 d) @& o- U; }% V4 Z
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,# M! X; \  Y- ]* J
you pay me only $5. ' E/ a5 K7 F6 p8 B$ l1 _+ ?: v$ [6 m

) M% c5 H7 J5 W% h3 j7 s6 i You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I0 Y( A1 i" K) [% p# q, h
will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep3 f7 m! B0 n; @9 E
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 0 P- R: ~" [" b
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's6 L( \0 X3 l1 V  v
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ' B7 a* V& }6 b  G5 `4 t  R2 t

8 o$ R! t3 P7 ]The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his% ^6 g+ T: B5 {) |, n3 e
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the9 s: q- E# a* M9 g" s' q) c/ }
lawyer.
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
9 {, |' h) n' U( L% Fthree legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
8 ^7 {2 ~, P+ R- u+ f* kreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
4 K* E* U- Y  b, ~6 ?8 c% {the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
: ]* y( n8 D4 K! d+ z3 k7 D: Wof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
) Q2 J8 s! K& m5 fhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right9 {2 V9 v' n2 L8 X1 Z/ Y
back to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
/ O' Q. O1 x  {9 G" @wakes the newfie up and asks, 6 Z6 n% G. o, B

! ?4 y% R) x7 ~  A8 q7 h'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and# C, t2 |  Y) d2 L" z# f: T
comes down with four?'
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, ^' E5 k$ y. P( OThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
1 h, F, Z5 s5 t5 C( ?and goes back to sleep.
2 S8 n! W4 T) R4 d8 E! T7 O, m& o" s  L) l  ?; C
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!: P" U2 I" ~( p  K
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the. e: x' q( V# o7 R: B4 \: g

) P# W7 {- C( r>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
9 Y, m& l, J, {! g>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
: D: b3 A/ \; A/ D& k+ \# R>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
% Y& C/ ~) U  M$ x>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
0 O0 B, S8 `' p! Z>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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3 P; Q4 ]9 M# q, B' R( `>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
" Q7 C5 ?6 \4 I>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
/ a+ G/ o+ U1 o8 f>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 4 b- t' Q; G, R9 `: W
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
% O: D% g' o/ K; p# U; ]>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
# h$ X! y. F3 \+ ]1 X/ ~
+ H: B4 u" D3 Q& p>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ; t6 m9 n+ K2 |
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
( c. S8 Q' x7 Y. l' h>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
- u* H) q6 F: G1 z( S. W+ ]' [>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
/ Y$ W* k/ n) w9 @4 B% F8 n+ I4 KA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a. k+ n' H4 X6 X8 ], x1 d
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb7 R1 F% i) u. p9 W/ n
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
: f: y4 V8 S$ h' S2 N5 z6 qthe newfie would l ...
3 ~$ D- \8 L! z, M2 N0 u5 g0 L

6 a7 ~2 g: U8 Z* ^* `+ u, ?3 D" n* w1 e, Z
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
! u6 e; L  L0 c“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,! L; p9 W5 h/ v) k
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
& q5 h4 a3 f- ~! J! d& L$ k8 T加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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! e5 N: I% V  x6 H, M% N% y1 ~, p9 E. Y2 `9 A5 o- R5 [" C
/ `8 l" j6 u2 l, \( r: G
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
% {/ D; O2 U) f" ~: S$ ~  }“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
' b2 W0 z5 F, \- {7 Q1 s! _好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

' h" t, J, r4 w; k, F0 e" f8 B# v真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 " @2 [# {0 t; D
8 W; L" V8 n. ^1 v
真聪明,偶像啊

9 B6 {2 f" ?# C# d9 L$ T5 p% U5 ]- r: j4 [& p
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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+ A% D3 X8 T, v; d
全盘接受一下。
' h. q4 D  H1 T& A4 [1 e1 Q
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 + }; W( T4 I% g0 ?4 W, r0 w
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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6 g7 q8 E" M; v: U; s' M2 d

2 P* v6 l, V* k0 F' |别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 6 D) b" |" b8 A
$ ~" c' e# k5 m$ k

+ U3 Q" _$ G, h- U
5 F$ i2 [; m8 I别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
& M# h( _0 o' M3 I1 ~0 K7 f' C" n/ o加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

/ I: E0 v3 ?! L- w6 y. N多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 % G7 M4 T4 f+ _8 p0 ^
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真博学,偶像啊。

' F. ]( T- R6 x  X大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 $ U7 O. O% J; E; @

# {8 N5 B  O) M  u/ V8 U大学教授哦,能不剥削?

% f4 ^2 h. r9 p3 ~5 o. m: R' }她是大学教瘦?) e  d2 `3 @* n( _& f
大学教胖还差不多
" a$ l4 k$ J( Y$ l3 {0 j她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是 )
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
# X$ ~/ ?6 @0 j, Q1 _; Y紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

4 m( F" Z( Q1 u6 \3 q* U2 s说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ; M! i7 g  i; m0 E& M
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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3 m2 Q: R' c, M* u6 h9 F哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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