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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
: H( B# {" D" {9 \# p/ Klong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
9 i3 B5 h- b% I" @- |5 d1 ~5 gthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
' l5 b$ |+ @* |; s" p$ k* Ethe newfie would like to play a fun game.
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
; K1 J- s2 I! ?7 F& G5 j" o2 r he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The+ R4 ~9 x1 L" B& ^( G
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I$ {, {: O" g* w. F; F
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,! f' q) m, h. c. I$ p' J1 q! c& K
you pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
8 r: n# A; a9 `% R/ _. C* Y4 a- i will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep+ @( A2 K5 n% y6 W
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ! {+ ^0 G  Z6 E9 \. K# _
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's  [& ~8 [7 Z6 o5 r+ N3 n
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
* V6 B0 E8 U  s: F: x% G( N. T
& D& g% v* q/ T# M3 N& F( T3 d  {# B6 @The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
7 G- p$ O/ ^8 J, s& U. Jpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the* u( y" O0 b* d8 Y
lawyer. , e& K1 C0 [" B" w3 n  l* C0 W

& ]! \0 Q4 H  D4 F3 yNow, it's the newfie's turn., N+ J2 U' A0 p6 A7 v' B7 i# f
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
+ J3 l% x* j" hthree legs, and comes down with four?'
: ^7 s& m4 B4 L3 t
3 _8 T& p5 `; L0 ]# L! n5 HThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all7 C6 {+ L+ \- W
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
  E+ Y% x" [8 s# Z0 [$ v, O6 Tthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour$ I. W6 h3 v: P1 T  }
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and& B; d+ G7 Y2 G5 f2 W3 e
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
. i7 [7 v! u* K/ f& b; k/ Jback to sleep.
+ D  ~9 ~) b% A! K
' p3 P: y9 i3 D% M. L- Q5 R: GThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
- }6 B% p/ k) L1 V+ Rwakes the newfie up and asks, ( y! x8 ~9 ^0 ~# h

+ ^& `' n' ]8 ^3 E8 B'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
( N5 Q) k# E( D$ Q9 ]comes down with four?'
$ _: f7 \/ z6 n
1 F* G0 ^+ X( m2 s2 ?1 lThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
  S$ i1 S( c" n, C5 Y. E$ Qand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!7 R' g+ v3 d5 f/ R
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
7 `0 O, ?5 o. E
' x5 I' e, B6 c>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
( S' F7 s% D) T& g$ U>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
9 ~% c5 M3 \) _( q>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
4 h1 _+ h' U2 A) [/ m$ o8 Z: m>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
8 c4 X: L* N7 [' w>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
/ b  ~) U  m9 D% H>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a ' |1 S1 y7 d# K! `; W& h1 R1 w) N
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
0 b8 S# U. ?9 o- K>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
' [" [2 `  m7 G$ q2 I>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
7 }; T5 q+ l0 r/ z  T0 O* _- w% g0 g/ B7 A$ ^  u; D/ A0 l# l
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 7 g9 n7 h$ C% `& x4 d, O! y& I& A$ ~
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the   x6 x4 P8 D  o7 E* ^3 c6 a
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand - `3 u1 h$ s, X" [# c3 H
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 3 B9 X1 o1 i' r
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a% G6 N  ?4 N9 C/ b8 s. i2 m
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
& M+ \# w. D6 s9 w2 ]6 T# ^that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if% Q" I4 r% `$ Q
the newfie would l ...

/ l" V: g% s( d9 V, _  ^7 Y
1 R& @$ X0 k& h: p9 ]# e
6 X/ H+ C3 L: F, ]; }( e+ S2 M好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:+ Z1 O: ^  ~( r5 V+ m( w2 Y
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,; Q& x0 i/ T  W. M* q" D; J7 L
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 1 }. K7 _3 ^) o  t) I& b! z
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

; c# S( m& H9 J真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 1 x# p, T% x1 y

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9 j6 f* P& l' |5 s7 \5 w1 l" p. c  E
9 U% ^9 ?6 i8 x3 ]" p% y  \好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
  {# E' m8 X9 P- G' M“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“," v) ~; Q$ @6 y2 n
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

% L) H/ R  L7 k4 K+ Z: Y6 u7 b: [真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真聪明,偶像啊
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% T& E7 k/ f( n! Z: ]全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 . K( D+ C8 e+ h0 M

% s" U. m% m- S- L4 f( @5 y
' i1 L5 d# V2 }! @3 G全盘接受一下。

  y1 e1 m+ }: n; r" ?1 B真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 ( d6 ~) c+ S  B5 m! |0 M2 i

6 Q# O2 F9 O2 {- T" S6 S) l/ Q/ t真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
( T: n0 E- K$ Q$ Z

% n. f) E" W: |7 H3 x/ ?1 ~$ o9 P% S. ^- _( C. H
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 : ^" J& P& u/ {( s  c

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别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ' `+ \5 m% v4 ~5 b
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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5 V2 w5 c$ u' I% G2 F& E真博学,偶像啊。
7 v) N& }% D" d2 I
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ! Y' h5 {3 g3 e4 s1 F/ I, S1 d8 M
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

- ?: I% V# ]; r她是大学教瘦?
, w6 m  W2 p$ d: A6 l5 Z6 U( m4 j大学教胖还差不多
/ n& q" G+ ^+ P( v她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 $ q: c$ k# F- ~( T; a
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
6 D( v* ~7 U4 `% ]2 _
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
0 s7 P6 f% M" T  B紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
, \7 J# I: z, t3 z7 o7 @
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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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