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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
) i+ e. q7 \/ k. J& i+ Llong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb. b2 G. Z- D& H6 g, f* l) W
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
" K7 |. \. k2 \the newfie would like to play a fun game.
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
- N4 f- `2 m* v2 |& Z1 R he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
- e  X$ A1 w+ e" O! w( c lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I  ^1 V8 ]. N, v8 d1 v; l- g
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
: h; D5 I* [( d/ w+ U7 R/ m) Lyou pay me only $5.
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* D/ E  {; H7 u0 {6 F0 m You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I. \! N5 w  u, Y$ t: W  l2 m* z1 Y
will pay you $500. 0 s9 R3 ^6 w+ S  h

) k& [. }( `( M, T* C& M This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
- K" U- w$ D: M4 Qthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. + }+ U+ A" d! U
0 G7 L0 K& c0 a" l; c8 b. k0 d
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
% U1 e: N0 ^8 F$ e) C1 tthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' . A5 T, l! k5 d
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his3 Q3 [) T" b6 y
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
% n+ ]: F$ \0 \* P- U7 Y, M: S  _lawyer.
" x2 R$ O$ P1 H: H" I
1 {( o# t$ M2 y7 p1 U0 J6 KNow, it's the newfie's turn.
* x! }% [" F4 \- k+ Y0 j
/ s, H& U6 j( fHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
$ q3 A# k3 c! Zthree legs, and comes down with four?'
1 `/ m1 v3 z# G9 L9 Q$ U. W
& H; X  x9 t% b  hThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
+ A6 C" G& ?6 y) nreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
* o7 ?. ~/ `2 e' h( Q3 Bthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour7 w) L9 G9 X8 P8 D' l: }
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
2 ]6 _9 k$ {; I' W2 `hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
* E, s) V8 h3 X( a5 a9 |- h4 Zback to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
& C: L; a; v( ~. Awakes the newfie up and asks, / |1 m1 H& {3 o  ]. S0 f
0 x; t  f6 G* L4 B+ R$ N" J. o
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
) x( |4 \8 {/ A6 e7 _- Lcomes down with four?'
: @- \; }1 C/ A9 ?  O0 C
3 A, M7 G% }' k# ^. d( @1 TThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $55 }0 H2 F2 M; D# J/ m/ H
and goes back to sleep.7 w  |0 C, b- f
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!+ V$ X2 v) r2 T# a  ]. y0 g

! `6 Y7 O' T% t( B' h$ ~" N% ZLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 0 j; q. \3 R; `2 o
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason $ a0 K. _, W$ k) z
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the ; ]& V# k3 ^# E( ~  U" O
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
  g9 J) z- `  y/ T# H7 \>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
6 D) p6 h5 O5 N7 U& Z/ o1 G
# Z- m; X7 n' h- L# u>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 9 n" P& a0 i( p& e) D5 v
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
; X  ~# b* n3 j3 ~# R9 |" ^5 b>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
: _" |1 F2 ?4 g% z& g5 O* B8 x>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 9 b% O! Y' J8 P3 s1 t
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three% [4 ^- i# a8 w+ q; u+ U
; B* V% a6 w- T; r( {3 z8 _' r
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
3 y  \9 o( W( v/ L>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
: t$ G( G" G5 m" o- P/ ~! W: F$ S>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 2 U, }: O, ?, ?- |+ j1 P+ V. ^
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
5 e) T% g! B6 I2 k8 N: Q, XA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
) r4 V( `; k" d$ }- q) w$ Slong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
" H& y) G4 Q! u! fthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
- T  C6 _0 r- K3 |' s+ N# Jthe newfie would l ...

  g7 b6 r3 Z! n, @* a0 q7 [% z, Z, z1 U/ Y

, c' Y* }, J- _  T. _好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:6 D4 w8 B% ^+ K+ H  G
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,7 S0 K5 L$ Q7 t+ B0 d8 C* C: M+ m
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 9 L' }$ W, F6 R1 U
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 5 U7 ]8 X, u7 O
$ j" W) `. l4 b. `! q  {
! Y. d, J9 x4 l1 P, O
' P) c9 Z( `! S
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
1 i. y& V8 K6 C) l“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,3 V! [2 w  Y' H
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
" e  K, ^& n9 x' ]; b. [4 d
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
5 n5 Q/ c- ?" k' L$ Z! g3 Y6 t
4 o( ^4 O9 {* w( e! E. Q: C真聪明,偶像啊
) \' `1 F6 |# G% X0 ]3 c/ R$ d

% n5 b$ V7 ~1 a7 k7 H全盘接受一下。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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! b' ~9 Y8 I5 \) g$ p: o9 i- ~/ t( b6 L8 d1 H$ k( ]' f5 A  e
全盘接受一下。

) C$ H. ]' ^8 j2 J真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
" F* ]# F# w6 U
! c1 G/ ^: q" T" m9 W; F9 q9 H) \7 \# q! y真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

5 r' e1 P+ X# B/ n; I! e* M* ?+ G5 h9 _

7 ?, x2 `5 |9 A2 K* s别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
/ s" O$ P0 G* L# X1 B* @8 i8 Y  S  D$ z6 J3 |. p9 l

! @( c5 \, b3 p! s  b9 y) i( H+ b. b/ I% u) j% X
别把我往坏路上领啊。

; S) [: n0 T9 \* D& U  D$ \你已经在路上了
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
2 @% |2 D- a4 Z) h1 f% I加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

4 `: o" Y/ Z" L. C; E4 o! ]多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
  i6 ?  G* f3 Z7 i# ?* [1 S$ F, F+ [: I- u: d; P; [
真博学,偶像啊。

1 g* v: G6 r; \大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 , l3 e, Q* q! j6 U

6 p1 @8 W, c. z* Y2 \1 E7 V, I大学教授哦,能不剥削?

8 B! [  b* _% l- a% W) i她是大学教瘦?
& [7 h, M: S6 e, m+ j) w大学教胖还差不多 ; Y0 u" l0 f9 N1 B
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 2 ]' @* C9 R0 J# [% J
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

- ^& L8 ^6 O$ V8 m$ v' D8 I0 c5 g说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 $ Y7 b$ b5 f  o7 j) v
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

0 i2 z0 g3 W7 @! {/ ?3 x+ d5 M; @+ D+ p! B8 _" t8 Q" F; S: @% K
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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