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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
9 T' j5 n% X8 flong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
; k# e7 [0 A& M8 n! T& T  pthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
. N: [- g; u' K$ r/ U0 g9 U% j, Othe newfie would like to play a fun game.
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
) p5 b  S7 W  f) @( T3 }. q he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
) Y! H1 ~4 ~) |, L# R lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I) q' ]8 W! s' b& f4 ?& ?9 s+ ]' R% E
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,1 {  l" ^4 b  x- `+ Y5 R+ N( J
you pay me only $5.
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6 K( d2 ?  R, ~% ? You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I4 H  B$ e6 O; Y  C( r
will pay you $500.
4 c# u% f- l1 N/ @* H1 o! [
8 g" V/ D0 p* ?) z. U This catches the newfie's attention and to keep9 u# {; F( f5 H" B/ K1 S9 }0 n1 S6 \  o
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 4 P' K$ L5 P4 X

/ L4 J6 h1 H- B0 i3 d5 f, WThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's( f; N! U, c) E3 v( F: {7 z) a
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' & ^- e( Z6 d* i, O% m

. y- e. [6 t0 o# z8 f  {5 S! W2 sThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
; E' `9 W) N3 h, A: C( ypocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the0 I5 }% C) w, v6 M( r  h3 Y
lawyer.
/ u, W4 ]+ S( }9 p0 t# r4 D7 n: d, Q2 [
Now, it's the newfie's turn.* ^/ Y# x8 W/ H5 D) U

  o8 e* e7 H, Y/ P! [! p4 fHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with8 |2 i% `* H/ O( ?' L3 y
three legs, and comes down with four?' 1 @6 j! f& [$ v/ |0 Q) v7 f

9 g7 f' ~) `( I3 L/ FThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
. f# [1 f2 b  ~7 p/ d/ p! Hreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all' {% K  t) D% T% f$ |
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour& f. Z: [9 ]- a: q6 n* N2 U
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and2 Z. ?3 a9 D1 `6 ]6 Y# l2 Q" i( R5 _
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right3 M9 t0 s" }! @( g
back to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
* e+ X6 W& F- {$ b& _& xwakes the newfie up and asks,
: ~4 z# E1 ~, [  H7 x7 J; t2 \0 K! d+ P- I- t$ D8 U( V" e/ H, v
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and1 y! O0 l- u' I; h/ [6 T
comes down with four?'
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3 S4 i' c8 s8 n" YThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
8 ~* O7 q9 S2 I3 Y" Qand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the1 F9 |+ b; t% i0 K6 Q, u

+ A& K1 {; ?/ u* O8 B: K>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two & x7 ^* s/ M# }. S  d* B1 V2 t7 C
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 9 D4 @/ k2 U2 z. `) [
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the ' C: X! P' O- P0 Q8 ]- J/ \- w* p
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, / O" Q( Y9 C$ I+ B0 X
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct& `# i' t3 k, U* h6 O  V) |5 V

; d* J2 Z/ W. ]$ r1 v  a  P$ L; r5 A>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research : x+ ^0 w; b; h
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
: u% a* j' h* L' C$ _/ ?>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more ( @- U. O$ ]3 N& W  r$ x. v7 X
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, , q  y' x( }" \6 F
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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1 \8 R7 O6 _% v3 `. ~>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's & }+ {, `' @/ X1 L
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 0 M7 ^: \3 m1 ^5 w
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
1 V- }" E9 {9 X' j! v. U>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 1 e- u5 V; T; O0 H8 g  L
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a8 ]/ C) H0 X$ M( N, @' w
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
0 i) X/ ~% y+ P, A1 d3 q5 rthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
* ]: Y- d8 X2 K: Z- A' ]/ bthe newfie would l ...

+ M" l4 O, }  P- t; Q. ]
- g+ s. @, d) f3 t" @0 J3 I& o: ]: a0 j) ~# x) |
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:& M0 [" J3 ^  G5 z! ^
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,# K# x( i" ~8 h" h
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
( f7 v  w; u  d( B0 N加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 # \6 l3 C. l! M5 L2 L$ N
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7 B! S# {4 i9 V4 j好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:, `9 U" T( k) C/ J- T8 [; \
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,  l3 g/ U' p! n2 r9 g
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
$ B3 x+ P$ h8 g# ?
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ( L) G3 |3 M' M# n% f. G# F
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真聪明,偶像啊

& h6 c- N4 r7 Z: C" W( Y- z
3 H( [1 [8 Z, n1 b' c: ]$ b1 |' h& v全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ( Z! r: J9 M/ h

3 q7 ]  x4 f5 Q: n8 h+ z9 h' n, ?$ u5 g8 g' I
全盘接受一下。

4 @$ v6 {% e% ?5 h9 P5 O真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 - X2 i0 R! y$ d: |$ y

2 X, _- Y6 u/ y; I) P真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

6 G& d4 l6 h# X1 O$ `( |2 a6 C/ d$ o: p
/ V8 E& E2 p  u# G5 u$ B2 [
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 4 Q0 n% E" d9 w$ w1 i! ~$ w. H

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8 O9 u% a- D: {' r* {: R, C: p
7 c! x; F# ]* ^, O别把我往坏路上领啊。

: p0 s1 X* F8 ^. F; r+ R3 u- }你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
: K" N+ H* c4 |加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 3 X8 [7 G7 J0 T( _5 z: x) ~% h* S4 {
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真博学,偶像啊。

0 p: ?" L  j1 G  x- e大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 $ B9 u! u& Z4 G" ~" V2 X  x
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?
/ B4 N4 o+ d8 ?& r9 Y大学教胖还差不多
  P% l3 E1 s4 S8 r2 f7 I9 {- \她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 , U( I6 j2 I: o' ]4 s. R, x/ X$ K
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
9 N: r( u' x5 ~
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
6 c) j# p2 m3 W紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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6 W% d6 q0 a4 u$ {& p3 U哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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