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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
. ]( z8 ?9 Y( \8 `5 @" ^8 d9 X' R2 F* hlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
7 V" o5 l! Y7 ^/ D* W" Nthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
; h" h* s$ `2 K/ gthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
; C# b& Q; a, V# D  G- v' h) `  
$ E5 J5 k5 y  A9 e The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
1 p; D2 S0 ~0 {: t* `3 T; d he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The5 o  @  L7 Z5 v* h8 O1 P% P
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
" |' Q0 \! K% y8 mask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
' i) C$ p0 K  E4 y+ myou pay me only $5.
6 e% B( ?! }- c* f5 b( O- e
5 T, V. D# w3 g% H/ a. c% H You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
  u8 J* Y' A) {* o/ {: r will pay you $500.
, a# B" ^7 X1 ~3 C8 @9 j7 t6 Y% T% w
1 t* S4 x6 ~/ b/ S This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
9 b* k# N" G' w  lthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
! @- }7 ]2 m: {: B6 D) @
. M1 f# T. `3 l; v/ sThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's8 ~! e& F, l  M$ a% V
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' / n& r- s- P, Z# l" j9 N

+ D) o% @7 G) g+ {  C, FThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
( ], Q' q4 c. @6 c8 z2 N5 f- A. L! {pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
# h' w- P2 N. E7 S. Zlawyer.
: x) }  l9 e$ W7 g5 r0 K% L: Q- F: ]
- \; \7 H6 x+ p! n: I5 y! cNow, it's the newfie's turn.) }6 @. `* y/ N' L8 h# j
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with' B- z" Q) P* O- ?) T5 k% V9 h
three legs, and comes down with four?' ) @0 P$ Z/ P4 r1 c  T

2 k8 j, C  k) k1 h' yThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all& Q0 s* f: f# n5 f- A: E
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
# l5 a9 r; b$ k% f" t; z' uthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour5 q% q- T; W, g8 p
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and) {# L5 c+ \4 J+ {" O/ j
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
% @6 s1 Y& x- vback to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He3 s8 J$ D3 L6 d& @! N( F6 k
wakes the newfie up and asks,
" T0 n3 k5 q. L
: E1 ]$ D+ i, z0 g'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and# `. F7 H! w9 Y; ]5 v- d
comes down with four?' / w) R- j7 ~' F  I7 R8 k
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $51 y3 l$ e: v# a  x6 g7 v- x
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the3 A* Z2 {: X2 @' J1 K% A, x: P5 Z
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 2 c# R1 E; Z  [5 u1 J5 d" L
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 2 u" x, l$ k3 T& w$ \+ u
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the / E( D) p9 j* d  P# r6 E
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
4 h6 S6 P! E- o>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct8 K) N3 `# Y6 S! o5 d/ o

  m5 `' ^+ B8 h7 N' v/ I  v8 i1 j>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research " f, ?: c/ Q; u
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
) W9 X, C! f* |& n& q. T5 f>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more ; l: v; v! ]( f( h/ x/ P
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
  D% I1 v9 Y4 D5 b' l) T>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three* U/ ?$ s5 P$ {$ x

" t  I" S" L! z" E8 @7 q>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 4 f! ^; a# x% G. n* m1 L
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 8 @% y4 e+ ^- b" L, e, f  O/ P
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand " o. b4 _. A8 P
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 & v) Q4 j- _- C5 G1 @7 O7 U) O: V
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a* j0 z- D7 y% D
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb& ^8 d5 x0 M( @% i8 H- n$ ~! |% W
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
! [  i' {6 I/ g! z) q5 Lthe newfie would l ...

& \' u, p) l" a+ I# N3 Z' n( N7 K2 G" ~' M# s+ ]
* c* N; `' ^) M8 f1 h( C
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
. r' M6 ?2 @4 @1 ^“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
6 a4 U7 Y4 c- Y8 e# j& S好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 & B# i8 {, G% l) \( V
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
$ W% o4 E0 @' ]- D# i% R
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ( c# T! h( N' B8 C- d; f
8 L" d& h1 j) p/ N- [

0 _4 d2 n# |0 K- \/ G8 D; j( p5 w3 {5 O! {! R( Z; E2 L0 l% `
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:( O, K! `/ K) X$ D/ O0 G- ?
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,, n' S6 o  h/ L. ^5 Y$ u% T' L/ n3 N
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
: V0 D8 U9 k1 i* K5 ?3 w
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 2 K( ~( L0 [7 F+ r

7 L8 C4 A; N* U( U3 d: W& \真聪明,偶像啊

8 h  x7 d' t9 L5 g/ _) S. a! D, @% t: p9 b. m7 b
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ( i, d3 x, b: @* T9 [$ A- P

" Y# o1 L- s- y1 r  p5 j1 i& t) M5 c7 u9 A1 X/ d' N  F. b/ O4 _
全盘接受一下。

+ [$ C) O/ x& ?真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
/ d$ ], B6 N& `1 ?+ d  d' h% [, {+ q! B3 z: W
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
9 ?$ _  U4 l2 r0 `
+ y3 J4 B' K+ \

- ^  V+ |: R3 c. M- a7 t3 f8 h别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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9 d1 I( I6 u0 j4 h7 t  z
+ _" p' U  c( n1 R, s, B: f: _  C1 [. c2 Z+ a8 R7 W
别把我往坏路上领啊。

8 J7 R) G! V' Z3 h' C+ ^" P你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
# r7 {& ~* S. m加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
3 C. O( c8 i3 D+ f8 s
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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* L6 h0 E/ N7 S( R真博学,偶像啊。
; f! m; ?' M  g, T. ~+ j0 ?
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 9 B0 d% q/ |+ S; ~) O

3 F% J2 c' Z+ l( Z/ t大学教授哦,能不剥削?

+ Y; K1 V) Y2 h  Z8 R她是大学教瘦?
6 ~2 ^6 d& V' M; N% D& c. J大学教胖还差不多 & L  ?+ @6 S% S7 c) x# T5 b
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
! }& j+ ~* f5 P* ]3 Y+ x) T紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
: k5 q. j4 T$ Q& U. V( k
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
* E% t( k& n9 X8 d% Q紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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