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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a2 v7 j9 j! ]8 ?' ^! R) O
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
% S( f: }: H1 gthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
1 X  k1 W1 z: ], tthe newfie would like to play a fun game. # [$ p$ S6 ?% k  h
  $ j4 C- D2 p. v3 e  j+ ]
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
' e# `. o/ t7 p) S" T1 x* N, z he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The- o* H! u$ `% F  U: o& m
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
0 c) Q/ S; h  S, s! T0 _6 Nask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,8 q& f+ G3 \; M7 H3 `
you pay me only $5. 8 K! u  u8 e& d# O  ^$ Y! @2 i, x

& p( ?) R3 @$ i0 c4 I( D5 p; I6 s You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
) i3 |$ ~. u. W3 k1 Y) F. G will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep; L, Q% x# L! ^$ ^" |& S
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 2 C; U9 R& q1 o& C9 N" p7 b1 u3 ?
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's% E5 Y+ T% d6 _+ Q5 h4 y
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' # {5 M) I: ^# `' h, c  z

& a% p" M4 Z0 N2 }The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his" A7 o: L2 G& D5 H; h& o
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
6 v4 R+ e: Q+ f7 Ilawyer. 0 V0 F+ n  K+ P, [: [, M* ~
, N/ L8 F( h9 a( j6 O
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
- l6 ^+ V  |, |8 Q/ E  \6 A* ]$ Z% {# }  D; i8 W* I: d2 G& F6 }7 @5 e9 e
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
5 o5 E# `: o! ~/ Nthree legs, and comes down with four?' / _% P1 H- a& a- ^$ W4 p& {

8 d$ j% w& X4 W+ B9 FThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
( f0 ~( A* [& i. o* h+ R5 e6 jreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
& F+ L8 x( E5 q3 W9 V1 k5 X+ x) Xthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour4 h1 c9 H- ^% t9 A$ m, q! g' j
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and9 q6 c# M! y' h3 _: R
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
9 b: J# N9 t9 }! p- K# A* Vback to sleep.
8 D5 [4 z! q4 G
. H1 D9 r* Y2 B) i' d& yThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He: T& p* o9 o7 L
wakes the newfie up and asks, # s  B: F5 E6 t% w8 O& b
% r7 T" c% M& V- `( C! k
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
  f9 |1 `( `: B( X1 `- tcomes down with four?' 5 p9 q+ c. c! t* }$ f0 H

: P1 p) G* I5 h  DThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5/ J7 m  B: ]" H) l/ M1 X6 v
and goes back to sleep.' S3 a6 P& t' A! ~

% t2 K8 O# R+ h' i5 R  d
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!1 t: f9 Y1 Q  m+ U  R
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the2 O" ]4 L& ^" S3 T$ k7 |
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
2 G6 Q: R* N$ |( I% ~) W>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason / P- X) M1 V$ J2 a5 k8 Z1 s" U
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
, z- Z5 W; C1 ]$ C/ E; Y>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 0 J' }% e3 `' k5 @6 F
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
8 F/ }" X; ?& u) l6 w1 ^9 J
( K9 X7 e9 R# Y! w6 c2 k; e6 h>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
7 x  H; W9 z( n- p) z. P$ d7 q& w>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 3 a) z( K6 W7 I+ \
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 6 `' y: R- K8 ]
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
, j' m. c. y/ r* V3 C$ I* P>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
$ A0 ]- C+ s5 ^7 z, `
2 s4 y1 Q9 A- I* D+ i* x, D. A1 m>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 1 c) w* N4 j# K3 ?! D6 u1 W# V
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the ) x  Y; q1 P# X% y; p' N
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand : m) A8 B+ ^* b6 E" D6 `
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
, z, t# ^$ \( X  l* i, AA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
0 w  @* U3 @2 w( I1 H7 Y0 jlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb( m8 T, X) L' ^: q4 G! N
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
6 B6 C# A0 A$ {& Tthe newfie would l ...
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% |3 R/ ^; P( F5 f9 t% L: R3 k

0 t8 L# h9 O9 F+ m/ S' d好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:* Z1 }/ E2 b/ |0 V* ]5 w
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
' Z% K# b$ O) D' V9 S好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
) _5 r# T  z7 h  V加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

; n; ~& y! a0 {. }/ S$ {真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ; w) k; _) b) Y1 R+ v0 M
/ h  F$ r, L% c6 @' ~

1 M5 X. [" ], r! R- C9 Y9 N% [0 r$ _2 H) r0 S9 z
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
0 n# r( e! u- h( i- ]“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
6 w- A# N# h; L好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
9 y4 m" V& M8 v. B
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ) u2 E$ k- r' b8 T7 J* ^
+ @3 B# S! f3 A' E' ]/ a( P
真聪明,偶像啊

' h% X. e" Q# _3 N2 {& ]& a+ {9 w1 z; ]- c1 h% G2 p& \0 P8 ~; C
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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* D* @) q" E# e+ g% r全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 7 g. S  Q% v2 P/ w+ q$ D% c* Y+ G

4 e% l  `0 s/ Z真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
8 F1 q- b! _* n9 Z! f1 F
- c7 O% P. E/ v( m+ n

( z/ D5 M2 j% k( y  O2 j" B别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 3 r9 W# W2 C/ i3 x

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. m" G' o* K1 A1 {; c& E% T+ q! J" l9 A% L, R& O3 `; C
别把我往坏路上领啊。

# F. z; c' w6 N$ ]4 ?) O: x; E你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
- G/ p6 i$ T, l$ Z加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
7 Y: X, s; w* y6 d7 z$ K2 o/ d0 J
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真博学,偶像啊。
; s- |* Y, S: e5 k) n1 @2 b3 |
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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% C: D; k1 V/ B3 H, L! c: C大学教授哦,能不剥削?
' q: r* P8 W% v* J" J' _/ U
她是大学教瘦?
7 m4 }0 U% l% T! ]7 Z大学教胖还差不多 " K; x5 f2 s5 B' c
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是 )
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
! S5 W3 w$ j3 y7 I# _5 Z紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

2 u$ v/ ]9 k8 b& v1 x0 f% [说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 4 u% Y# e* r1 V/ |: Y
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

3 Q- [* q1 E1 v+ P5 P. H/ F: K' |. _5 [; V/ c7 H. w: Q
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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