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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
; a- z) W* H4 Olong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb0 a& F9 C+ y1 M; K, l5 d/ y* g- D
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
( j# q5 S% W1 G! Z0 P( l4 }6 }the newfie would like to play a fun game. 9 }  b# r+ x/ m% T
  , b8 C! Q8 e7 n. B
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so+ [: B! i6 ~6 x! z: o4 Z
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The6 c3 y  c3 \3 ~! I2 ]' L
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
' ?) E5 |+ F! k7 y& j5 o( Hask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,7 h' N4 u- F4 p3 d
you pay me only $5.
$ F' B. m4 G) a5 d4 u % H$ S# T, b7 F- s" T9 C
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
; U' [( ?" ^$ U* x2 A; \6 O) r will pay you $500. $ A0 J4 |& r' h3 ?" o4 S6 s# e
4 m. E, e. r% A, ]
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
6 \0 ?+ N9 g! Q8 R0 l# qthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ) ]6 q9 d" c, ~# Y- |( k
6 D( h: M4 ^, p
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's2 W7 T! _$ F% q$ U7 }) J5 }
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
$ q) f# Z3 K8 I1 ]
) E; O$ }4 ~' R" }The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his: k: g" u5 [0 O6 ^
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
+ v% H. ^8 }4 q$ ~4 l" Nlawyer. # k+ b) ^: D$ n
% U2 [$ ]% @6 o) W8 l
Now, it's the newfie's turn.' U& h" F6 b0 j0 o( h: l

. \% M$ R4 Z1 o2 J. P  P. G5 M/ ]9 {He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
9 w8 @7 f) }3 k/ \4 hthree legs, and comes down with four?' * W- \3 @4 `) R9 w3 M
0 o7 E/ k' j# z5 r" h1 E' B. q9 o  b
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
1 g* }9 Z  q' D2 ~. Qreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all9 o2 I& Q) E- ?( X7 N; E
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
2 U/ C# V: {  u* d) U, qof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and  i6 J* }; A( k2 F0 O" v
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
  M# q' y4 O/ Z% mback to sleep. ( D$ J' K. H! o& R0 {
; g" r0 y9 E  I' f- S0 @" \% Q" A
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
' ^# ^% G) n" l8 T! c# u0 m( B2 Dwakes the newfie up and asks, / g( d- m5 ^4 O2 O$ q
9 k& e0 b9 D) K; P
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
& V3 e  Q. K' f& ]% G% l. c+ \- vcomes down with four?' + z7 x3 ~! \+ }: _) i- W
7 R  A" s* U" r1 j$ A& |+ X
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
3 i. @6 o$ }* g# m: W5 aand goes back to sleep.0 u; G4 B2 U: V3 e
6 q, t: E% c2 E5 @. v  \! Q
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!$ T/ L, q6 ]7 |- F: @7 N+ |! [

' O8 q2 |/ y5 x8 X9 qLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the  J4 w2 D$ r0 ?4 g
$ I0 g1 |' a4 F0 m) L( R8 w
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
2 j2 H7 O( D: O  V' u>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
% ?. i. e# q. Z, E6 A" |>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
1 }4 n( @4 y  W% q4 M* }: ?# j>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
8 I9 h6 b0 M( f>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct. y* F1 Z5 `% E1 y

! a: j$ E; ]+ O0 ], C>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
! K2 y% r6 r# T: J0 Y! b/ ^3 Y, E>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
2 M5 z2 J% S- b/ ]9 c2 j>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
3 r4 W& O$ o7 D" h- V+ ~" v$ {>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 1 Z/ m+ n( I2 e$ ?' |! S
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three1 G. ], T# q; [; T8 G. z2 m
; ~- I9 K$ @# |& G/ y5 N6 y
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
7 Q- z) E9 T$ N+ F  `0 I  C4 E>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the ( r, P" i9 ]/ f$ J% P) Q2 ]
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand ! P* a, U3 y9 g; e0 f. y' n9 |
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 - ]4 K  d5 j9 X* y9 W, M
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a' ~$ H7 ]* D  x( {- p* ]  }  W
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
9 ^9 G( A& O  g1 o3 F/ U! U4 ?# Y4 kthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
8 n* }/ u9 @( y4 C7 sthe newfie would l ...
' B, w6 N! G2 c9 I. Q

: W; J4 _0 o% q" A$ L4 m3 O' h1 `3 w3 S% Q" f# j
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
; e1 p! l3 h% E8 @4 P“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
/ `) p1 Y. c' L, ?2 V- c3 |5 O好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 5 l( j  I7 F5 _! ^
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

$ _$ }1 L& u0 C9 L/ d# t真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 / k# f9 C2 t0 {- |( S: N+ U
2 c; k- ~7 ?2 |  W
+ {- p8 f: r7 W
1 G6 r1 V' h5 r  F8 C6 ]
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
  {  K9 N% u! s# D% x, ?“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
* c: n$ p0 X2 v2 J$ {1 @好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
- `4 A+ x/ X2 w" Z' u+ c5 j0 u
真聪明,偶像啊
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
- P4 I- e# V8 V
1 ?; A" A! Z- P% M! C3 Z& K真聪明,偶像啊
2 Z3 c) `, z4 q+ I8 {( w) m, u# r

9 Z' T2 G: u9 C4 U2 E7 `1 X3 x6 M全盘接受一下。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 % [) s: e5 [5 R/ G9 O0 @# [1 `6 A$ E
! W9 p2 G/ H1 f3 A2 H) H$ |

7 w" G/ n, K2 W5 z5 c全盘接受一下。
1 L" p/ [. o* E4 ?
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 . V0 o6 o" h% ^; P, O3 E, `

  ?8 u* o. ~; B真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
) ^" K* ~% \9 p5 E" i* h) p

( g1 ?2 I9 U# C( }3 ?- |% x' x5 r( _$ U& M( f) G* L  x
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 , o* s5 M# y  p+ E. D+ x0 i
9 r" N/ @. t. v0 n5 f4 G0 w

2 d+ h0 L! |5 O# x( J2 v
! t  Q2 l/ E. K0 U7 I  u* g$ x别把我往坏路上领啊。

# N6 N* T9 w' {+ T6 L; _1 I0 J你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ) Z: z! N6 H2 j3 R; i9 ]  K# I
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

" p' R3 W3 y7 i9 |- f; k5 C1 C多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
3 a+ i! [- G! ]% e6 X- [
. q, u3 D$ l5 k  f真博学,偶像啊。

" j, L* a+ [" E; w' x. S" w大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 , V! a3 }) `" c
  W9 X9 O0 Z- z; B# f/ O  F
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

4 t0 F( A" i- D她是大学教瘦?
- z  Q$ R! j! N1 W! K6 n大学教胖还差不多
; c- H/ h5 S. }$ R8 f* P& }她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 7 l$ g; c& _7 |5 k9 F" R
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
$ y8 ]4 S9 a0 }2 i4 K* F( b5 c9 u* q
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
: S7 C0 {$ G6 q8 c8 G) \( A紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

2 r1 \' |0 w0 ?) X3 h, z7 U; ^/ s0 a
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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