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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
6 h9 m  A* I/ `long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
) K( e4 @2 C, Z0 A3 n5 Dthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if* ]% L7 u0 `* o4 D# B
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
/ G3 {" E( i- c  
, N' w! C. _% m The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
* I& Q$ n2 @, a- @( A. q3 k he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
6 e2 b  I; ?7 j3 P* f% { lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I- r0 Q) Q5 S- X3 F. Y* E
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,# c& U3 Z  y' ~9 q6 q! r/ t
you pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
/ h2 Z1 N+ F# K5 ` will pay you $500.
1 H, j5 G8 O( J
$ n5 t- `! J, n$ e; v; F This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
8 u; Q& ^, h/ ?/ t4 ?2 wthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ; \: Q6 A9 _+ V' ]: r1 Q

" D9 \% a+ W. s* e8 SThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's9 f: |' h4 E7 L3 m7 g: z
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ( K1 n0 y1 O/ Y/ d
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
! Y( g3 E2 p7 g" A$ }pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the; h; s8 [$ `! `. T( n3 C
lawyer. 2 G7 a4 e4 ^' y: F& J6 b

, x5 ^: j( J/ i+ sNow, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
9 y% X" V/ V4 j  B% C. ]' Lthree legs, and comes down with four?'
2 {- i) T; @- ~, a# r- r9 J# l' s. @# x
* R& ~1 f4 K4 g! h7 @The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all& J9 i9 b  j& @! t# I  D" b- ~3 e
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all8 L! i. h7 V1 h: f; z
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour! @, O- ?! M% u& O# {8 {) a
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and5 q3 X- Z, r( @8 {9 y
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right6 K2 C. f+ c  v& i6 T8 a; ^
back to sleep.
* V& _, ?7 g* }( n
. k' O1 ?0 I' e- ~$ F* V$ {" dThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He/ M# O% L! ^& K/ y
wakes the newfie up and asks,
3 S6 }' P4 C7 W( Q$ `/ `% h. b# a' m
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and. O, f& R' v8 @' d: _/ C5 O
comes down with four?' 5 G1 A- k- n" R2 A, n
# {6 @2 d5 H3 I, s8 U$ h
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $50 N2 ?9 v5 w* j& _2 i/ Z
and goes back to sleep.
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$ W5 q- m4 N, F4 A
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the1 W6 m+ O! ]; x- K3 @2 z7 A
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
0 n& x9 d2 I" d/ w>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason : X' {9 y2 e  D3 ]5 q6 m; k
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the : E6 G7 P6 Y2 V4 ~& V
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
8 |4 b2 v. F2 B1 s>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research / r7 @* D0 ~7 F6 L2 i, f' Q
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
# o4 [% Z9 n& U>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
: f# g# E9 ]  ?6 E/ A; y% u' L7 |7 R>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, # Z$ g8 b  F2 _6 F8 ]" l
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
9 y; H- J! E% V
5 S; H- ]/ Y+ l>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 3 h3 s0 Z2 Y, Z; e2 I
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
# l  _5 S/ q4 n8 x8 T>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 0 n/ b4 X& L  ?( ]' _
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
# m( d/ h7 q9 k. f- O0 K( @1 ?8 @A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a/ E' o9 \$ K  W* x
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
3 N: H! o- d  x0 f% R+ u) Dthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if. m2 e2 M/ X* K
the newfie would l ...
* v+ H. N) j' X8 f2 m: u9 D1 I

" `( y( M- k, \3 x) c- u
, t" n/ X3 R7 B" m. o好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:  @3 U1 e& v) Q  }2 {2 q
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,! m5 j/ ~6 N/ K2 Z9 l2 H
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 1 [  d7 b7 i- v( B% l6 i
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
$ T0 A. U9 G# o4 k" g6 q& r
真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
9 h( j4 d- t4 {+ A
' j2 b0 g( u& B/ \0 V- J2 l' O, l9 a4 a  @1 x

2 o7 O' f, A7 C好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:3 p' q6 A" v( o' o
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
5 {/ U5 [" x/ ], {好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
0 q* a0 [. j! C4 A+ W; o" J0 o
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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  [+ i) N+ O  |2 i6 H. [真聪明,偶像啊

. @, z! I, k( ^$ b
9 V0 e8 J! f2 x" ?$ c) A$ x% @  Y全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
' N5 M% p: z# |- a- [1 ?% M; o! e; L8 ~% ?* s

" G7 w: R( B6 J& t9 w3 a全盘接受一下。
1 }. \0 ?  G" O7 J6 ]8 m
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 4 b! M% a2 \% X/ c7 `

9 h0 h3 v7 s* e6 t) O  m真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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. \& P; p; ~* S1 }: n
  T, j7 x. U, Y% o3 h) L) l* S( {& a8 a/ J& {& @. C$ p/ S
别把我往坏路上领啊。
( U7 {! I9 J$ @2 s7 q2 J
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ( j. `0 e1 Y3 \' z: w/ P
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
! A7 s0 S) Y9 m
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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1 ]& [9 E5 K* {+ n真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
+ o/ j) S6 Q+ p* p: i# R. p8 ^$ N7 d7 @" g8 ]/ I
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

" ~/ v2 ^  O1 j+ _( L/ ?- u她是大学教瘦?; a6 `3 m9 X# a7 D2 [: G
大学教胖还差不多
0 G: l. ]1 E" B& `$ _/ Y她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 : q% t! T! l' N
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

# j; j+ F3 T$ z( T+ W) E5 K1 a- Z说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
" k/ o5 q# [! ^$ N紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
  K' ^; D# M3 m) n+ c; u
$ d% \- K& _7 c. I
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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