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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a0 m% @' a" G0 W1 Z
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb5 y% c, Q/ k" G% A8 b- |2 x! L. k' X
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
$ Q" ?1 _! G5 L* l) Z* Q" `the newfie would like to play a fun game. 6 ]0 t! F2 _( A# M, v! P( h
  
1 K* _* i, E; X5 g The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
8 w$ _- ~7 e2 d* `/ z  _) z0 a! O he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
; S$ k" T! Z+ O3 q. | lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
4 [$ W$ l' p8 \1 d. Mask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
) T/ u: Y, l2 N0 \* r& _/ Oyou pay me only $5.
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! m' f" T6 T1 |# u* z2 m0 G You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
' b" ?# t- f& t- o will pay you $500.
# M" q) L; o% V% j0 e
: ^0 l9 s4 _, @+ D: G- G; a This catches the newfie's attention and to keep5 T' Q! d  C( }# i, g; q1 P
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's6 z' `$ _& T* Q! x
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 4 X. a1 |3 U/ {" d  X

: e) B+ {% N/ P( z3 M: yThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his0 ~6 ]9 m. E4 v1 N1 T. u
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the; p9 M; q6 i) n" r# U* G
lawyer.
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.% L9 b: l2 X3 F) U) L$ I" y" `" D

* ^: W, ]9 m( B% P7 h: SHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with2 h& p, x4 `, o* s
three legs, and comes down with four?' 1 t- W( K4 J6 s+ k9 P5 o0 `: L- ?0 P

4 k& q+ m. B! q' j! gThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all6 f6 m7 G. M8 b$ }6 G) c$ a  ^+ n$ F
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
9 ?  e8 ?( F7 w. Jthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
" k& H) _/ `4 a( e& e1 K( ]of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and' M% n3 W3 S. t% T) H& @
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
% {# q% Y- Z4 ?3 {3 _- P9 H- r4 jback to sleep.
0 k1 ]. h4 D& \' q7 o3 B+ x: O
- j5 A' T2 X. J$ ]- p, @The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He, A3 ^7 }; q( |' O( T' ]1 `; ~
wakes the newfie up and asks,
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'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and- d5 @  [/ A1 W/ i' F1 c; S
comes down with four?'
: E3 m4 `1 z/ X2 ^
. T* Q, H, m/ B* G4 ^. Z; A! gThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
2 A1 U, J6 O7 x2 _and goes back to sleep.* o6 h, U6 C) W$ K
$ \2 }6 v# `+ z' h
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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6 g4 e5 `2 F( Y  p2 H+ K$ LLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the5 i' g5 ]4 Q% [

: k+ ]. @. j6 v>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 0 F6 H6 G. S; U5 }& ?6 ^2 w
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason + W6 J) y( {) c4 _( b
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
0 k, I' z' I+ Z5 P>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ' }1 U; i# U0 M5 v# O: V0 |
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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: u+ T' l( M3 X4 e* G: i& G) Q>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
  A5 u# q0 H- u  K; q8 Z>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
0 e9 [1 }6 f. L& W( v- _- r>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
" l; V9 e7 Y2 E* G7 R/ \>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
7 Z- |" u- g7 K/ \; U% t>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three0 R5 h1 L% a5 ]- j
& u6 f- j+ ^# }/ r1 Q1 v
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 8 i+ n( V4 I  Y1 c9 f) z
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
8 Z% f$ M* [) D: F5 y2 \>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
! o9 g9 T; H& R>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 3 w' e0 f: L- v2 j% {6 l
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
+ U& z1 x# c: S' z' a0 G+ u( Ilong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
7 z3 E1 o7 G( \8 I. {" Gthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
- H% {# q  k" i' gthe newfie would l ...

5 n5 H. t4 `9 f# G' K- h4 h" k3 d4 S' u, m7 H* W8 Z" s7 B+ x- A9 W/ x

. k  u! @. V) i7 X好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:1 f' t2 K: ~- Y) ?& `  v  v" W5 u
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,! S4 O1 ]- L6 R
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 3 b: t& f: H8 y% i1 _; J
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
  v* H4 R" z1 k5 S% X& [
真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 % A6 o& i* e& i! e& V" r5 p

% |- ~* `/ e. p" n3 o, S& J% N8 d  e+ \

: N9 b. t1 f" @* F9 E8 S好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
( v4 ~: c6 s8 B! ], Q7 T' O“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
, O  d' K$ \  c% {( C4 V好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
% ^$ b  c& R; H. l3 P
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 , M  d7 C$ T' I+ {
, |" X8 s+ H' R1 b5 M' S2 d# B
真聪明,偶像啊

4 Z+ z- q0 _( Y2 B! Q1 T3 n; Q% Q7 c0 e$ d% E$ [% n9 I
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 & N; {4 @  ~" x  k" [& V4 }% o& Q+ s

/ s: W+ m8 W6 K4 b* `2 Z: W" c7 g. ^) b' b
全盘接受一下。
  r% Y5 O4 }1 G& s
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
  t" c5 ]+ u0 R4 L% h- K
  ~; e; g0 c" O2 ^, w2 M真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
& t6 v- {5 t: b% n0 |

6 }/ t8 \7 c: v- q+ l1 O3 e; d6 C' H. R6 Q
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 & q  X' c- ~/ l1 c
% v7 K+ ]7 d  c1 m" o7 w% k
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8 w" z2 q5 J# u7 ^: A* ?$ s$ [( k别把我往坏路上领啊。
7 S8 |5 N$ |) S* [1 W
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 + E) }' J; u# K4 o+ G: y
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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9 I/ o4 u8 H( }2 u  w真博学,偶像啊。

* a$ c, a+ f0 P5 ~3 h, E" @: J大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?2 i5 u$ D& a, U
大学教胖还差不多
1 ^7 N, p6 Y% w她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表   f6 e5 j0 `9 z
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
% _8 q- E3 f) v1 m' ]' }0 C' i
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
: X+ d3 K" ~- e+ `$ y" X+ I紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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. x. z- y9 a( F; K6 [哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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