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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a5 Y- g7 p7 T8 x+ V+ [4 f/ c
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb9 |" p6 W( N; F
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if( i3 b4 t1 g8 h( m/ X4 Y2 B
the newfie would like to play a fun game. 4 o% q" X& o$ S: c( f
  ( ^+ v, c/ _  S4 ?8 U4 \
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
1 g3 @( w5 s5 ?0 }4 g- X6 n( D1 s! d he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
9 ~) |7 @1 R1 N+ O lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I9 ]8 e1 P* B4 R" S
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
  Z5 R" ]. B% U9 _7 E0 gyou pay me only $5.
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0 \6 O" `1 j' s/ R; w You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I8 L6 E; H) S* U; {# I$ F7 _
will pay you $500.
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% s8 o# Z' q* j. x# I This catches the newfie's attention and to keep& D% [1 F7 T, c3 ]. ]6 B' N
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
4 v6 ?: B0 v8 f/ t" E2 u6 X$ E4 |, ?- @5 m- _
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's) H8 D; v' u9 t4 K/ S. x
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his. S" ^7 X8 R! @0 n2 p! a
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
8 S: m1 ]3 `5 Z* L8 A  n& [+ Plawyer. - x; S2 ?: [3 l- B- {: c) d: m

! @: n) S3 H9 R$ x6 J: `' {. D0 [Now, it's the newfie's turn.$ U: x5 r! C3 o2 p( O. e+ N. V3 u
+ E. S. `7 c' x$ S3 y$ w$ u
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with. O% I! G; @8 c$ P! n" ~+ N
three legs, and comes down with four?'
$ W% I2 s6 b0 }9 {# W( |6 Z+ R# V
# r8 v! U1 B/ R' I8 ?$ ~The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
% V: d4 n$ {% H7 q; Z* S# s* q0 g* Greferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
4 k7 Y  v2 V9 W# U" c% W0 Q  {the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour& b& E6 h5 X: y  z) O( f% L
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
+ N4 h6 q1 t, N5 Nhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
5 O: w3 k6 k$ i+ `: t' z3 Wback to sleep. 6 n0 n, R2 w% T
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He2 c- y; W4 ^+ X2 e6 D
wakes the newfie up and asks, 9 w) T* Q" Y) Q& }

' s# z6 l1 c6 }( ^'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and5 O  G, @8 ]' Y  t0 [
comes down with four?'
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$ }+ }- n. e4 ]4 I6 \The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
" H* P( F1 K, Q3 eand goes back to sleep.5 S, [8 u! `: U0 B1 u

9 C! _7 u. ~9 ^$ M1 e% p
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!* H' i' Y* \* I! _$ R/ k

2 T" G" C; s5 c; n* P" x9 ^  HLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the( h0 e& D" g1 ^; f

/ c- Y0 h% c* C>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
7 [4 ^# u0 c3 C>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 2 u( w' B! P8 [  d1 d9 u& c2 p) ]
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
+ V& u# r2 ?& V4 j$ O& e% \>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
0 m0 `  U, P! X6 Z# Y3 l>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct4 y& Y7 X9 o! l# b. u
5 Q3 l- Z) G3 a5 t) x
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
8 e- u; X* I, H8 x8 p5 r>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 1 A% d; j& v2 G' a
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more ( ~  h$ a: v3 U1 m3 D6 x
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
1 ]: _3 |3 f/ ]9 F9 O* @>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three2 |+ S8 R- p% k. U2 r

5 Z& |- e9 z0 z% I8 a>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
! S: n) Z" W+ o& N% ^" b>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the " W7 i1 T2 O  Z) T3 _! [$ C' [; R
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
- U; l1 j; S1 z" `>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
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发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
& I- n, t: s0 I4 r1 {+ s/ bA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
2 u2 @8 b$ I9 [1 p" ^long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb3 ~2 X& J  S3 v0 R" d8 g
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
% z9 ]2 W: Y, D' u0 r; wthe newfie would l ...
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/ _# s: k2 W9 p4 R, A( L9 t; \
5 ^7 U: |& f6 g! V$ `' j' m好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
. e- x/ ]+ U% g& i4 ?: N“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,5 l8 Y4 r+ J7 S7 o, _  Y( r
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
/ K3 d$ x/ ~# L加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

. U' M! B2 T0 }# o5 T2 U2 e$ Q& y# l真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
; Z  z: H6 |- S+ a% \* L8 G9 L* W$ q, f. v0 z( ^, Z
& ^! b8 N/ X& e: J) {. O

! f# H5 [* L8 o# K3 y4 ^6 E好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
& N, W+ ~" ^5 m0 X& y$ [/ r“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
& o. u# t8 N7 A$ m5 {  x) d好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

% a( `" B+ d2 K  U- z1 W! u" ]真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 % X* n' j) Q. \5 z( @  M

( S9 b" d7 x9 F4 P9 M! h7 @# ]! p真聪明,偶像啊
* T- @4 ^( u! o. g  R

" n  Q1 x- z( U9 X5 a全盘接受一下。
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发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 + W7 p: a* S6 C
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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; o" d, \( T) ~0 S( i' _5 N9 u( e6 w! C, _: j5 f/ a" F, [: Y" F
别把我往坏路上领啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ! z/ \6 O( T2 p  `
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别把我往坏路上领啊。

6 v% {; s0 N8 s) V. i0 O8 @你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
6 x" \. Y- u: W( Z; B加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
- M5 h+ ?" Z# z8 ]& o* S6 n
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 : y5 `: @, T& s! D/ j# f& }/ k6 s
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真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 " d. U5 F7 e; T
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

) ~. u# A0 F& b/ A1 C; f0 N她是大学教瘦?) E/ o6 W+ q$ _1 {5 x
大学教胖还差不多
9 Z- ~( g1 {( }8 n- m( t" I  Y她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
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发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
; C: T! e( @0 x2 g; f  i- F紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

2 D, ], o6 h, G  a; C, g说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
8 h% X6 V, R5 r/ _  o紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
+ E5 I! T6 s  ?0 R4 z: C  m
+ ?* Q0 H, V* s( ]6 P$ K
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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