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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a& J+ `4 S4 U& S
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
! N0 p- M! ~7 o. F% j  Mthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
9 u, t' p5 v! Ythe newfie would like to play a fun game.
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so8 e/ _# g' M" C2 t) E  E0 t
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The7 I6 m* P( X0 N5 ~( Z- S
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I' |$ r3 ]2 Q# x
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
2 G' w6 ?$ g/ pyou pay me only $5.
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8 T5 U& Y& e/ V. ]+ V: J You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I( b. r0 O" A4 v( X% x: p$ C
will pay you $500.
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6 F7 }# i0 }: L( b This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
& B3 m( B, n; v* _the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
; |6 J7 T3 }( w7 {  Q
+ t7 x- i  H' }  P  tThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
3 p. J4 Z) I- e" u2 bthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his" L0 C' `4 {' w0 `
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
$ o- L* d- P+ }& @lawyer.
3 e1 r# |; I$ e- l
7 C9 Z" h9 S$ Q5 p$ T7 b- D% uNow, it's the newfie's turn.# H8 F9 G* [1 J/ n6 P+ V8 j# l
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
  k6 T( v! U/ @' I% i: _8 Hthree legs, and comes down with four?' ( t! b  B7 ~  V4 D' j" X8 j  l
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all' I/ w5 b6 Y) K( N
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
- I" F2 N( W' J- L- Othe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
% d8 K3 J: f/ f- D' D/ e8 B0 bof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
5 j$ }6 E5 T. d% dhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
( F0 p* m! ~3 ?! N9 Bback to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He% \* S+ `. z! I1 |- L
wakes the newfie up and asks,
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'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and5 K5 W! ]: o+ n# @
comes down with four?'
; a6 _/ @9 z& f8 P) ?  p
+ Q. S% J7 x" V; q1 X+ @, M$ Q* YThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5$ f1 h: }4 i& z8 c* a
and goes back to sleep.4 h9 q7 \4 e# p! C  F+ X* D1 t
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!( u1 L7 Z0 n2 O8 D2 b1 L2 M! Q
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the6 F% X( U1 C9 B; u; F6 m
  [9 f; }  `# D
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
8 n) K. }1 M# L% c/ {+ i0 }7 V>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 1 I+ R7 p3 n0 J3 C* w$ @; U" M! k" R
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the % c- G" |( i) q2 x. p! a
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
1 V" I" e& D" J$ v>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
- i3 v2 |2 |" Q4 P) C1 K9 w$ C6 o( o) x* q( ^
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research # ?" x0 h- o6 u
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
2 D$ C  K, [# j  g! [' r8 y) [/ W>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
5 o$ V. j3 T  w) W>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, ; m& p: k% O- C9 Q  [( p+ O% ^* }( _
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three2 k( g  ?: l" B. o1 K
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
1 n7 I- U* I. s3 w. D. \>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
6 h1 }6 i/ |4 ?; I" o; P/ v$ m>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand " `0 E1 _: p- m; F  @
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 * W( y& w% H! f2 o: c$ x
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a% V" H% m7 ^# R$ }5 S' \' m
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
: Z5 k7 J: |3 a5 x" X) O1 ?0 E# _; cthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if) g6 g' j  L% a: {- n
the newfie would l ...

3 ^+ J5 C. h; u2 l- E" D* E( X
  `! c/ D7 G* e" J; n& k. M/ u
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:& V- H0 [& G4 R' @4 v. F: e$ S
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,/ A; J! x4 O$ h
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 5 d$ X' \1 g! g2 N* z2 |+ G
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
4 R/ c$ E# e! U4 G! q" U
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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1 \2 ]7 \; g6 `  {2 U5 u+ `" I* ]- |+ g$ L: [7 i
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
# O6 x# p& i2 H0 Z, ^1 w“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“," v, C  ]& Z, D5 t
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

" _$ {" V/ q/ y4 j. S真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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4 l! n9 Z4 I: `; T! ]+ b$ E1 d+ z真聪明,偶像啊

! O; w# N. S  E/ h: m1 R) w! ^& R3 k0 O. C, [1 t+ B" G6 U4 C
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 1 T/ M( n$ E/ q& H  X- {

" \  r7 H9 z" o1 a1 I
$ F3 H. D4 u5 L# P全盘接受一下。

' W1 B& y/ I' F真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 8 v7 s) X5 t. Z, d
2 t! F) J' |  Q% Z; ]: h0 C5 Y
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

* O) Z: r( [) ?# f' B# [- u8 R, D( K$ B+ c2 F3 j( c

& b% h( p* D! ~. @! Q别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
: b7 F4 C6 U# w- l2 l; f) y加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

1 G# ^  w1 A0 l: K多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ) m4 u0 {: h9 `( L7 L& Q/ a0 X2 ~

4 p$ c) Y6 [* M( K真博学,偶像啊。

1 W* U" O3 o# S: l: b8 c$ v大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 * M8 b  C- y3 L
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?
; y+ {" ]- T" a, h: c% m大学教胖还差不多 . E+ c# l& N) D: O1 y+ K' H3 ?; ~& A
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
, n, V5 \/ ]/ c6 M0 k2 ]7 L紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
4 p* u* |, ?, t  d
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
, f/ _$ X9 S# s  `1 n( |' W% A紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
) Y9 h) r1 b* ?" K
# n6 [# |9 Y4 _! M1 s
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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