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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
# r: G: e; D! Q. {long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb9 {1 a  H! x$ m4 [: B. ^+ ]! v
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
' @1 O: j4 Q/ A+ m: k1 E# ~the newfie would like to play a fun game. + D/ A. ^+ \  a0 `; G1 M
  $ a  J' I6 D' g) U  `, \1 a
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
1 k1 ?- Y: P$ s) ^& D he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The* ^4 v2 _9 d6 @% B4 H6 w' r
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
. x3 }. F' F( z" o/ i* y/ m- ~% v3 ?ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,8 L2 b! T3 u  L9 S! S9 _
you pay me only $5.   L- Y7 F5 q- X& y4 [( o8 N& q
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I% A5 _& ~; y6 e7 L. t0 x- e0 n
will pay you $500. ! a. r' t' J0 W* U' ~
  q# t/ `, D: I. i
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep# G0 b2 [) H# U) m# h
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
% O! W5 |3 `0 @" z1 Fthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' $ w+ N+ ^3 q0 U5 |, d* X
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his& r5 v2 W' w; u' b$ m
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the& h, w' [' g2 Y. A
lawyer. 6 ^. s: X! n6 @: T

; x' ~+ \6 J2 a; y& a3 V0 FNow, it's the newfie's turn.
/ `7 n7 |% n) @% N
1 v  d) w# Z! ?$ x2 pHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
$ f4 R. U  e) lthree legs, and comes down with four?'
3 F: i7 \4 o2 d3 i
4 p+ ]5 O  ~- c; mThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
$ W( v: k/ N0 Vreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
4 f0 g3 A: ^" ?4 s0 X0 \# tthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour2 W4 @, S& t% L$ u9 ]' a
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and) N$ M6 V# T6 H; l8 q
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
' @% A) Q( L( I+ Y# mback to sleep. $ X5 r: T# C9 e9 Q

- q6 {; y3 V' x) d8 v7 }1 y6 F' HThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He- \- `9 r1 |+ h1 @0 A2 i2 B
wakes the newfie up and asks, / d" a. u' D/ y+ G( t! L3 x6 }
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'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and- G4 R  }, K! j* _- b. B( I
comes down with four?' 2 _# h$ V6 q; r) w% u+ L/ O
# K( X2 o, }3 E& J0 W: q9 x0 x, I
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5: ~/ i: R* f+ H: }
and goes back to sleep.2 ]* M1 C) v  e* p. T4 V
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!% N( D( m! T4 t1 h. K, \
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the1 O% M2 f9 }  n

! o3 A/ d, V8 f9 }8 D4 n4 ^>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 7 |* P6 T+ s& V! v/ |4 ]  G
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 7 T0 g- N) s2 U, z$ J
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
! t0 w5 k% m5 h4 v0 o>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
# `* j3 _0 z+ b; w3 C/ O>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
4 }4 |# N% ]$ g6 \# ~4 g# h8 [( E$ X' B! I* s5 ]2 V/ L: D
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research , A4 }2 M& v. Z/ L6 k0 T8 \
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
, g4 ~3 o' c2 |, k1 T% m9 O, R5 _>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
- ^. f' b1 I" z5 R8 f, C% j8 _>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, % b1 `' A# {0 F: H1 _# I
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three9 b- R6 g6 M# \  _$ ~& s, ^

4 k$ O; i/ j( |5 E, B8 b- q1 b& |>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
" I5 i& }" [4 o, X; ]>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
% [7 `3 Z6 H" W  U* w  k" a>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand & H9 {& L. j! |6 ?
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
/ k' i+ _8 R2 g- s' n5 Y: N! S* @A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a" y. z8 a' g! |5 d
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb3 B# m& t$ p1 p* w( J) b4 x7 _
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if5 x1 i4 M! V! W9 h6 [; v8 V
the newfie would l ...

7 z9 q5 w7 Y. }! o! o/ E4 A' z; f; F- M* i

' H5 d3 u3 J. P6 R  _2 u& g* j好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
* k  l) A) J, X: r, U“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“," w* r# f" y* @6 F
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 4 V' ?8 P  a! E
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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$ M* F9 O5 g3 e9 E& }
5 U# d8 K& {' O$ `, O, l. \' _7 {+ K8 A8 N
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:- e6 R" C* o  R1 u7 a8 {/ ?
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,) }( P. Y3 \0 N! q
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

' w# u6 E$ w$ _: z0 b真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 " Z1 u7 s! q$ g0 F

: X  p; f4 S! q2 v9 _1 s5 q真聪明,偶像啊

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% l% s/ j  O, j全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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全盘接受一下。

9 W" |7 A  j$ O- m真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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8 l3 R( {8 R* O0 p" ?真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

+ B% f  o" j" I9 U
" P" z% z# y$ \: X' e8 k- H8 {
" l5 y* t+ N7 D: Y! z# O4 f别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 6 r# i1 C, L. a7 c3 _% `# X
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
" X) |7 Z( e$ h( x: X- ^5 _" d
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 " d( f* x! S* [' ^
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

$ E3 v2 R' {) a  V多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真博学,偶像啊。

( \/ N6 {9 X6 W# d  j大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 7 T. \9 T( f6 ~, v! _( B
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?
1 g% |7 [: `/ x6 y  V大学教胖还差不多 4 Y, h* A/ g- s5 L- V
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 - T9 g9 {; O) A, s7 ?1 Y7 _: S
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
& P# W* O- l! _2 ^. \6 `
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 " T3 @- t# k+ t: L& I
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

$ l$ \7 f8 g. A
  L9 C3 Y& }0 I8 M1 q4 A$ p哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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