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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
# S; j  ]& p9 M4 r1 \long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb  z0 j" A6 T% V0 S( q
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if* X+ U- N* ]; w0 z5 M7 l/ s
the newfie would like to play a fun game. , n) X) S2 U9 X( E: c  y
  
$ s& o) p9 C5 W  e The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
& s* ?$ k" q) T+ S5 f he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The. D0 ~( X/ ?+ {
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
$ ?; ?# [2 M, G4 R% |" l5 P* Qask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,: ~5 D/ c7 {& l: b, d
you pay me only $5. ) a2 @4 h0 l( B3 `" w5 n
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I+ z# U- k7 b4 [9 g* A6 i
will pay you $500.
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/ n$ B% K8 V  e) k1 ` This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
- I8 x# I% O! x: K, r. tthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
6 A7 F3 U; ^9 ~/ @3 I. b3 K0 V! |, A
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
6 H* |. T/ @. O: C7 l  @7 N% gthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 5 X; ?0 [- r4 X' D$ _& w& i! C
8 v$ v( D8 x( K# @
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his+ y9 k3 w. A- O
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the, \' _2 F+ q! X% B' y+ n2 d
lawyer.
/ W6 O+ w) M8 E3 Z% h& R/ Z2 z; l, h, h( B+ i! P7 `
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
- k5 E3 s) y8 A& ^4 r7 r
  G& m6 a* y% _& THe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with) F* Z+ I! y9 A5 T" P) ^
three legs, and comes down with four?' - `* A) ~  e! H$ G
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all5 g4 Q8 k& |# S* y3 ]
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all: Q1 z; F5 F! Y. m/ t  e$ d( U
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
7 b, n5 G! O$ q1 Kof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
. W8 N& x# f4 A" O3 X) T/ shands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right8 f9 q" _$ b: E5 m- G  B7 M
back to sleep. , N% a: P5 r* z2 Q# c; P3 L
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He8 `! P2 _# o& v  P( k2 [' T
wakes the newfie up and asks,
+ ~' Z0 u2 ?) L6 a
9 g* D& m- u2 o! P& E( {5 O'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
0 U( k0 |% u% {6 g. j5 _1 E3 fcomes down with four?' " D; E  M+ [3 T; K- G8 c

$ ]7 r% `4 o: b/ e6 zThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
# `; n5 Z, e3 v: D  V' sand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!% _4 G$ h- q- k0 Y0 R. ?0 G

- p& F$ w  ^0 o) N: X1 j4 JLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the. a' `8 v! g& C" z7 t8 j9 {/ c
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
6 `4 Q! C: s3 j  ^. u; X>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
& z6 w8 [" K) d>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
% m$ M0 ^! E9 j7 O; n2 J0 ]>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
2 |! h# t/ f" {) s>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct4 k- @5 t# u* J3 y

, `4 ^: A' A9 d3 O( K5 _>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research # q! _4 m& C& v$ t5 |! E* C
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a ; k: s7 ~7 T1 Y' L: j+ O- `
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
2 z. u7 e; s$ @7 R>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
$ W8 F8 j% s' |7 y5 a>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three" o3 s9 N3 C$ ]
2 K) I* ~! r7 r: a0 t
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
% G8 C' ]6 L1 ~1 e! i4 f% ]>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
* k. R% k7 r( i- v; H/ B3 E+ T  j" h# }>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
/ ^- E. [/ E" n+ D; d0 A! X$ u>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 ' l. Q' x# r  h" v" d
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a. H" J# [) B) l4 w  W- K1 a  O
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb$ f0 J4 F; W/ L! A+ o: g: {) g- |8 Z
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if- |/ s/ \0 [; H$ J0 f9 G
the newfie would l ...

7 L  V1 ?0 ]  I6 u" q$ [  G  r' v5 q+ }9 X/ K8 \& Q% e0 s! ]

3 G1 T* c7 l5 x好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
$ z. Y6 T9 d9 ?+ Z* f“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“," {6 \  P9 A5 f
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 $ z6 {! F2 o, v' ]( G7 g, }4 a
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

( b4 g9 A+ g9 s* y9 _! U真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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& t  p% S# B" ?; L: j4 }
1 ]6 e: E3 S" D  t6 @2 J9 Y好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:$ Z( R' y- |4 v! |8 {2 s4 u% W& l+ J4 h
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,$ X' Q! V7 t2 O3 y* H9 q4 B
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
4 [- I) p0 }% z# k( Z- p
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 4 F8 m' q4 l  n

- s6 A" A/ n1 p真聪明,偶像啊

6 K5 V1 T1 d8 C: ^
% T2 E- w! [& d3 n' H全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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1 S4 Z* _/ Q) g/ {1 d$ a全盘接受一下。
9 X+ g' S8 k1 W) c
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

' h3 G" a. p) B- |( j/ J5 z3 x4 u* g7 r7 p  o, l! A1 k+ m

; s  P8 c* D* M: ?% ]# M别把我往坏路上领啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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+ D9 p- l+ S) K1 Z- B7 s
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别把我往坏路上领啊。

4 a4 Q. P& i. H  P2 [你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
7 {8 D3 }5 P% h$ {8 |* f加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

+ f( C& z* o( X9 Z多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ' F' Y! `, v1 {/ C/ k0 l

: y; p: ^' i6 y7 `真博学,偶像啊。

$ `: T5 \; x( v0 l& h! y大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
$ Z( z  a, G7 H0 t
" H6 o1 p$ f# b/ S, ]大学教授哦,能不剥削?

/ s) v" M, _5 M7 U7 i她是大学教瘦?0 h: G0 x) P& m  o0 o
大学教胖还差不多
$ n. e% z3 b2 h0 m2 y0 t她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 $ F2 x4 ~1 }- v9 s3 Z1 R' ]
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

. g8 {' d2 z1 Q5 A6 t: K5 i9 k% m说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 : H. n3 O6 R) [7 H
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

$ [6 E  j3 l; ?6 |  o; R: d2 \6 D& E, [' {7 B$ ^$ X  I
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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