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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
7 [& t8 N" h* b& k7 zlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb) m; v, D7 l: o7 L9 u$ O
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if; [8 g8 U* _6 W0 M& Y. z
the newfie would like to play a fun game. & i: v9 l) J2 x! i
  - q! E  d; t* o* U# E/ t( {( Z
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so1 s+ Z6 n; l8 h4 Z
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The/ @% j2 X/ [5 ~: E0 Y7 s- J
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I2 H$ @. `0 J* ^( I: d% Q
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,. W  A9 y" R) |2 z- N4 o! P+ _
you pay me only $5. 6 |- N3 x, H6 m
: {) i4 c2 u7 K+ p9 [
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
; q2 F  x2 `9 N2 |) C will pay you $500.
( I3 v2 O" O. }
6 G  E0 q2 S7 U1 L8 \8 p7 j' \ This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
; w0 G8 }, [' \2 q; vthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. " N+ y0 x4 L; d# \3 T" M
3 q4 _$ `5 v$ X- q7 D( u/ P+ F. |
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
9 R' O2 b; E/ C8 Sthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'   z8 z& b* l: {6 o$ {

: j( [0 \) s5 L4 @" YThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his$ e, U& d; ~. v& \
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the' m7 V0 Q/ U, [* p, y$ I
lawyer.   E5 R; q5 ?# O5 d; Q! r. G

1 g) z0 ?- U4 K' s+ m+ D6 aNow, it's the newfie's turn., o" ^5 F! z9 y: Y: {( C
& v$ ]: H8 t" q" u3 M: U) a( M
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with- g" }! l! U* j' P6 F' l
three legs, and comes down with four?' ( v  N' J7 t& }, K7 ]: ~4 J: b) G/ h- K

) V( ]+ v7 B0 M! E9 f, b$ a# `The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all, ?& G+ A. v1 O; x9 k1 y; s
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
; |0 e( u6 e( Zthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour5 Z" a1 y  w# P1 N, J0 T1 j) r8 H
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
1 I# ~2 m( C) Z, A. Ahands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right1 w5 _* {8 I5 H% a2 F2 X- |4 A
back to sleep. : W3 I) t; P6 b" X8 R5 I, s6 Q
4 {7 p! N  K9 G, Z! q- d5 \9 \: {
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
* r. S9 U5 g9 @' c* L- ]wakes the newfie up and asks, / S4 f/ Y4 P! D7 [6 }6 }

& ^  [8 M$ a/ z: Q& g'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
# C& i' H; q  k7 n1 l3 h# f2 p, lcomes down with four?'
: ~6 y( @0 }1 t! T$ ~7 D! O4 u& E) o0 R
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
6 I$ L- W, C7 L* G6 s/ gand goes back to sleep.3 @- P9 @6 N! t# X) d# L

6 Q3 h* F( H) _/ `% y8 w
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!. m! ^" T# ^3 O7 \/ h/ L

: l7 ?3 i) x2 c+ e7 ZLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
9 W. R, W" T0 Q/ }( @: H1 E3 D% M# p) i7 B3 G3 }
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
* n) I8 O! z' G, g$ I# z>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
3 ^2 w" Z. _) x>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the   t! ~! N: l( ^4 K7 D% c- d1 [; i) d
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, , f0 G6 A5 f7 f8 B2 i: `, D
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct" z3 b# c/ |" d! S

; j' B! @8 ^* q  i% k) a2 _1 M>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 4 L4 L( M( U  F0 a+ ?1 b( J
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
" t  _/ Q' ~* p$ o1 L( P>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
# i; q6 B& M1 X3 F, L- Y' n5 N>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
1 F0 [3 e5 t4 D5 W% a; X>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three, m  N8 G% f. R7 U; u) m( Y
8 m/ O# h6 A8 G& B7 j- G  y: d, x) |
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ! M- ~, Z9 U: R
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
# P- q* c0 p7 m: p; ]$ E>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand , \* U( D! F: \3 c" N- a  _2 _# d
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 % \8 T6 t3 c& y9 s, w- [
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a2 ^6 D2 ]! P; ]" i) B7 e
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb+ M! R' O% p: A  a$ q. ^+ L
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if3 T! Y# L8 w7 l4 j: B, b- H
the newfie would l ...

- m. w; t/ w! g& S, [% b/ Y5 Q! @' w6 m2 X9 y6 y, [/ B* _, R, K  K% s
2 z4 F/ e2 X6 z2 e& j- A
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
$ B2 r( K+ ^0 L“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
- V9 V) g/ q2 y1 P# W. I  D好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 # |9 N0 T7 P7 ^+ p* _4 U
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

" k/ M; p2 D# j6 \# C: O真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
$ ~- _* a3 t/ G7 \$ D: m) n- u9 z: R: [( h) W
; \. b5 \* Q, L2 W. b1 W

4 N' i/ @$ v) |: v. p: [好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:5 s+ O  i8 r0 o7 L3 x! y
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,# G0 y, c* Z2 I5 Z( F) N1 w: c
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

2 U2 l2 f" E+ ?% {/ D! ^0 k0 A真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
( v# q# O7 ?( L8 }- V9 T5 w$ [2 L. K
真聪明,偶像啊
/ Q7 Q; e" ]. O* U2 P% G, Y7 {

2 Y! ]# R! T4 G+ B# i! d! ?1 d* p全盘接受一下。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ' S, e0 v) s$ |" d

, [0 @5 f- r4 `0 v- R
+ T  M$ _6 g. h" L& M全盘接受一下。
5 F. C* F; H8 h1 |3 U; d  `
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 3 Z% k" b/ E6 n% D/ t( c

3 _- d! @# h  d1 V1 H8 }真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

5 S: a# P7 l* b' u! X0 E4 R6 ~, Y; B* g( @/ P$ M& ?8 ?) k
' H# y$ P) M" I" G) F% }" d
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 + L- W8 c: s  [+ i4 V5 V

8 m2 I0 d5 F) ?$ K$ Q1 V% o9 a
" R' X4 j3 c+ V# f7 a. }
% w! x& A$ M) _5 `8 V& d6 s! Y$ L别把我往坏路上领啊。
2 w+ w: }/ p( T8 L6 ^
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
) |' [& p! `  y* C9 Z6 Z加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

  o3 s" g& V, t" u多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 7 g' A3 q, g- J; D& H
/ y& Q: k3 h6 U( R
真博学,偶像啊。
* V' v& Q  g- d+ v# c( g$ \
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ( f+ @  M- Y" D2 k/ n( g+ s
' `9 w7 \. m5 S1 y  e
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

7 A+ k. a# i8 w) s9 D: Z& [她是大学教瘦?
. N8 l' \8 o: S大学教胖还差不多
3 r7 a- C9 ~1 F她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
5 S5 Q8 h) n3 X" D+ u9 d7 ^7 w# E紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

2 R, r* ?2 P0 P& a# G3 K* F8 H% J说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
& g, q8 B# `; |紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
) A( j: ^% ~* T: b: }7 o6 v
# T8 w: J: T$ m- W
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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