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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a2 y: Y! y, b2 [1 i1 u4 A$ l2 M& c
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb) r3 p. @# L3 A$ H6 L- ~/ \
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
8 c: C2 ^2 w7 W+ G( Y' }the newfie would like to play a fun game.
7 F9 p; d' z# y& @  
) _' [7 ^; [$ b! s The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
$ U7 }4 r# j5 T" V* b2 ^7 E he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The  u) A" I) K+ C6 _# B. U/ x6 M
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I( x1 \4 e4 g# K4 H- M4 R7 Z
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,8 C% h% E3 E4 f7 Q( ~
you pay me only $5.
: _( Q3 R, M7 Z+ V* ?; ~( a
( n8 G) ]9 P# @( b; ]- x% ^ You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
/ I* P" e% N" S! M will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
1 f* @$ q" u5 e' n3 e) s4 `+ `the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
7 b3 \( k+ r0 ^( B$ v1 @$ r
3 Q5 k" H6 U2 c: UThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
3 ?: K6 a1 l' Rthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ! \" |9 T  A( X8 I) X8 d% v  B

. U) s. l, q" LThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
( D+ Z. S# r) Q9 K& g& }( V8 Bpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
2 D2 [6 z8 ?" x  Nlawyer.
3 w: n, O) @- U! E
6 H% Z6 u0 z+ U7 z+ R5 pNow, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with+ A; E: P  N8 m) z6 S
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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0 c% s' \; Y- Q0 E/ R/ ?: ~The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all' B! S! I! K8 C& w. \; }' R
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all7 j) l, \& k/ a# @
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
# U: ^  Q* _1 Rof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
. A2 Q) H# m7 p4 J/ L; \hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
8 g, R0 E( B; v/ Q( Q0 Xback to sleep. 9 Z! h4 v  }0 b+ Z$ o( h' c/ D: y
$ y/ S' c7 l' D) [  c4 H
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He7 L% s/ J- W6 k
wakes the newfie up and asks, % \+ a3 s3 e3 I1 l0 n
$ |9 _: _- J/ L
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
  f# k. E: N2 _2 D( Wcomes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $54 b2 |" h' k( L* E3 Q$ J) g
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!, n4 ~8 K9 z2 i

6 s' F' D+ e5 k7 s/ cLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
- ~5 Y! i# M. E
' W- }( ~' `2 {>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
' x* R& I+ ^* [+ w" A>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
- Z. }8 }4 G3 r+ E& p>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the * K# t/ Q3 n' G2 t( ]
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
  s1 M% z" M# H>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
' ^, J5 o3 Z; w( w+ E5 m
8 ?8 n& Z* W! X/ N+ {& v>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 7 ]& ~# c3 G! X* X! T
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a # \, z2 A8 i' ?
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
; A- m5 L  {: T0 N$ g* ^! J>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,   w8 Y5 m- v' L4 M) X$ }% L+ y
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
; e( T* {. I  f>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
( c- R3 r' B2 ]8 g; q>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 8 z- S2 Z: f" J. U3 ?% Z+ y! }& ^  w. Q
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
1 H* J- A1 u0 U- R0 a; z& dA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a( _6 v4 q. Q$ @$ h+ M- L
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb2 w) U/ \, P) ?8 u6 t6 V
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
5 J+ o& k) ?0 vthe newfie would l ...
) U: `- t6 w# M% b  e

6 |# c" c/ k6 H9 {; x. P6 y  \
7 @5 W, k. Y  [3 \3 R' Z' R好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
% e3 E8 Z' F$ ~1 n/ E“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,% \) g- `- _/ ^9 |4 T* _
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
8 d& `8 W+ E* T8 N$ f$ O2 |/ T5 T) q加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
% v% B3 H7 F7 U5 {! O3 N( a7 \$ {
真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
( W9 }) |3 p3 P* i  v; V2 Q% ~4 r. ~3 I' J
6 Z5 h5 w. I- m; g' y7 b7 S

0 G; I( A$ |$ {好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:2 O9 n( X! R  [5 ^( K; n* Y
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
/ f6 n/ Y2 \+ c, H7 d* i: R/ y好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
/ k) R! w( i: T! [: C5 R
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
" j" ?. _& {& @# s* P  `, B
8 b& T' F- x# N9 }* w: T/ s真聪明,偶像啊

) |/ t( t* C. H" c. @% U1 {4 L8 k; |" d/ l- z
全盘接受一下。
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发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 7 q7 F# a4 x! L6 E
/ n) }/ v: O% n

; `+ u* v0 a& {* q/ p全盘接受一下。
2 q2 ]" o/ i1 M- e5 W8 Y
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 3 b1 W' _: b4 ]' |& F0 C. H
3 P* |" S* H" n+ b/ x) X. ~' V8 l$ \
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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5 O/ b) a) z' ]" P! F& `7 k8 r- S1 c4 s
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
( f& q8 R! x) b# w* Z* y3 k$ [' L9 c8 H: ]( [

1 [' J( C4 _) ~5 W" |7 l0 B! o* W, M5 E3 R; t* m1 c
别把我往坏路上领啊。
7 v# K7 T4 Q6 O
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ; ?4 O# c0 c# ]! b! {; o
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

- [8 Y0 w0 ^' O3 I多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ' ^) v5 R, }: A2 W# r
. R) Y9 ~: y+ X( v6 W; k
真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ) Q+ C: e1 p0 R) \. @5 M6 }
& i3 O# {- f7 I& n: J
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

1 L+ X0 ?- I$ M" O8 k; C; h她是大学教瘦?
* y; s2 q, R" W4 e! g5 K大学教胖还差不多
! z' R8 o3 ^: ?她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
+ B0 x9 p) C: R4 `2 y5 h紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

# m) F' ?6 o) n说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 : p! x9 F$ c8 n/ ]0 x
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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6 ?/ s* Q0 ^( m
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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