埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 4641|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
. l; G$ d2 G2 s! i2 Slong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb: ^, R" `7 M$ M! q/ k2 o
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
( s: o. Y6 X& q' W7 cthe newfie would like to play a fun game. ) M' W* s+ W% p% Z* P( B5 A2 E
  
4 n& N6 n! _( o9 M' Y6 i6 g* N The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so' ~) K5 _" l" R+ c* q! N+ z- b( |
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The& F# j1 t* d, H" Z0 Y& C* ?" C6 s
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
* Q- m/ v" ^% c8 Task you a question, and if you don't know the answer,% K. T  o$ t. e% v
you pay me only $5.
! Q# Q+ o# r6 I, q7 P' V $ Q9 d: k7 x( j* x! m
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I6 ^4 k% Q- Z% ^
will pay you $500.
4 q0 x) S) l; k
8 p" a( U- M) c7 P/ L5 E. c  m7 d This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
" W+ ~& {5 ]4 `0 ]7 Y+ `  ithe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. * m8 Y- g. K. n) ^# s1 N" v+ B
: m& A6 Q9 f" M* A. c; V
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
! T" t% A- H9 g$ P1 h4 q/ Jthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
5 K' V: Q0 A% A" H+ Y# e& b1 h( s
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his0 f8 D& V3 a- Z6 N  F3 s2 `& ?( \
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
! q) `& h; p6 t$ {; O6 blawyer. 9 z4 {: _% Y$ J/ N7 f

0 N8 \  W4 R+ T/ N, CNow, it's the newfie's turn.+ y* c% k4 l' K; a3 g5 _. v
) n& A3 f( @  m( \: F2 ^& e
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
- d; R, ^4 D. D# |0 sthree legs, and comes down with four?' 9 B) v* b! i3 F, C& ^4 _7 [9 y
- M) x6 V4 Z4 T9 @
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
5 m7 s& T9 c0 r8 {references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
' l1 i3 ^/ H( \6 P7 ^/ C9 @the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour0 F/ F- S9 o4 H0 q
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
, t% H/ R8 K) D1 H" L" W+ Khands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
- S  \* b4 a0 U1 {$ `back to sleep. ! ]: F7 t& i/ t2 G* z
) y; ~- v" }/ p: `+ l( m# S. C
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
* q2 v/ n% k7 zwakes the newfie up and asks,
& e7 \* z0 [* j, b8 h6 j2 m4 U" S
. a) P9 s0 K" T, c'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
2 @% T$ O7 D: ]8 p5 Z# hcomes down with four?'
1 d9 H' s# Z, ~! W& h- N' ~; M) a0 t3 D+ u4 C" J; m7 f. A/ z
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5& x* f. O/ k/ O, D- J: i( N3 @" Q
and goes back to sleep.
& r+ Q, ]! f+ _: Q# O9 Q3 g  V! e. B+ S% t9 _
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
; O% ]2 {1 X0 ~4 G
$ ?/ B/ P2 w3 T2 y$ q/ X5 l5 xLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the8 N8 E( k+ V7 N. `: j. V" l$ P2 G
! ]0 Y5 s7 |1 u2 p
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 6 q* C6 e/ H" \  {  \, r
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
$ |3 E0 L  T  `>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the   P7 m. U* O, C: f3 W7 j, F
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, - u/ O" \# x+ m; d) w7 t
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct# Y/ y( ]# Q& C1 x7 Z
7 C5 o. M% z2 |) w( j7 H1 ?2 D
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 2 ~, ]" T/ j3 b2 B. g: n
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a / t. z! Q2 y7 v0 Y5 J; s
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
7 Q9 \  T0 \2 b8 k! r$ P7 ]>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
7 X* n+ K: a, x>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three7 u% k; @1 s8 u- C; b& V" y
. @& e$ O" x. {) N7 U! ^! F) {  v+ W
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 7 f' i, g4 G! X" J* s: N. q
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
" G0 E) M1 S4 p! J1 M>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand # D  p1 [$ @( O3 h) c) O
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 ' F( z4 q# L8 p4 |. j/ g3 ~* B
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a1 K" m# X6 l4 [$ H5 ]
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
3 Q) R4 d8 Q+ R0 [that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
: V5 b: S4 F* b9 }the newfie would l ...
( q! i. Z9 u4 ^0 j

- a; r% T+ i: _. f# s  L
) O* \, \$ k* }好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
4 [- ~$ e' L* w' s1 T8 o“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,7 a1 w' a, d9 T4 G- y
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
. B( L; d3 k& z加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

' s" I( c  x; ]. B真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ) G% Z8 j: C9 Q3 d+ _! C4 Y- ~) i
3 c7 r) Y& ?$ c% D
' [3 F8 K  e6 e& m$ l
: @6 b6 A* Y% h- I6 t+ [
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:9 J7 ?4 J2 r/ ^( _
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
. N0 D. \+ z* k好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

7 x4 _- s, d1 F/ ]5 c+ Y真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
0 s# P% `/ K9 F  T
; Q. Z& P' B& ]8 e真聪明,偶像啊
6 r7 H$ S9 X% O) N4 y+ Q. E
4 j6 u( h# O) C3 Q5 J) u: V
全盘接受一下。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 * L  t! S' Z$ l( X7 U# @0 i
7 C' S9 B/ r' z# }- }

3 S& u# e8 c3 a全盘接受一下。
) w3 Q; {! N, y- w
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 4 B$ E+ B& X. {, z
' p0 {$ A% O8 j" \
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
$ L3 w5 n. |, O$ q( E' R) E9 `+ D
) o5 \% X/ D! @3 N

1 ~3 G, k3 X. S. S& y别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
$ I) |9 [9 y# [; m3 ]0 p$ V) [$ S% l2 k/ i6 B
( [9 @- A7 w; C- i

" X# e( q) M$ q$ j8 Z% D别把我往坏路上领啊。
3 g- f* i% O: r* a3 O2 ]8 A
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
8 `6 F: U/ w4 _8 ^% R加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
& P7 m( g: G# Q( c  @* n" e9 x* p
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
/ @; L' D) t) B. U4 [. [
! k, O/ K) m( L# Q8 o真博学,偶像啊。

3 ~+ D! }( ?6 ?' B大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 $ ~3 S+ h! M8 M# Y/ \

0 P; I$ w6 g/ X4 l& R8 l大学教授哦,能不剥削?
( C+ I% s! m1 f) X* j( o4 z
她是大学教瘦?7 y; ?' ^" _" `$ e3 m
大学教胖还差不多 + s( A+ C7 M! H+ P) {" h
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 3 j- J# b) o9 Y$ J! ~
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

! z0 Z3 f: x6 Z4 K6 w- f说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 & b6 d! j/ z# o$ z' ?! Q9 w7 ?) i
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
, e; ~# r3 ?4 ^- j9 i

3 [& p9 b, |0 F: D哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-2-2 16:07 , Processed in 0.180916 second(s), 28 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表