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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
4 X! [6 _" d+ J2 k2 ]1 T& V' q5 Olong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
* o# n+ @: ^5 B0 lthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if' Z1 N- g( m) g2 @) N- c
the newfie would like to play a fun game. ! D+ m2 C- O! `: I7 ]
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
' N; U6 z. }6 j he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
9 y: C$ i6 W5 k* g( t lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I, {  g( v& D) F
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,6 n! q- p/ Y( w$ \1 S) L  @
you pay me only $5. # l; H7 W  q5 V+ g
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I/ Y$ b2 L- k0 k+ X
will pay you $500.
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) L# F' N+ D. k  L  D% P/ d4 k This catches the newfie's attention and to keep5 h+ A( d9 t, |6 V9 F
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ' [2 W% _( q$ q
2 y, n% {6 ?% B+ V
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's' b8 a/ \$ i' Y, ~( H
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' * T: @3 q% g- ^

1 Z6 g! x& M# n2 j+ R4 iThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his! [; i8 J. K; Q& d1 h1 C3 e
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the+ Q/ m8 _' w. p! d  I' L# F
lawyer.
, h. Q2 G) `' f, {0 S* T; N! K
- O1 b. C; J9 f& f& i& kNow, it's the newfie's turn.+ s' T9 D  y7 A$ j' |' g0 J

3 `, l1 L- q0 \He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with) r5 q) e' K: v
three legs, and comes down with four?'
. ^5 e0 j6 l% n( D. h4 U
# z6 [5 m8 I3 Q1 m! U: UThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
9 T5 k& D3 ~4 ^6 xreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all6 @+ h- u$ ?0 ~& y3 Y1 ^3 E
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
3 p1 X+ n/ {. }. rof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and0 N! A- J8 `& h. b( d# t
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
! h) C/ {2 r) q% {- ]# l  A: l9 Dback to sleep. : C3 I* Q! w. B) [5 S1 O+ b
' \, x' ~3 V* C( P- v0 h) A, I
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
' E6 `: [: [* K( m0 T& G% w# ywakes the newfie up and asks, : k7 I4 N& S, k- L0 l
* L+ [- v  y/ T9 J
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
: |' d$ g1 p6 O2 r2 B. ?comes down with four?' 7 D: r, ~9 t8 t5 Y4 D$ b7 T) Y

- Q: I$ _: r2 u2 p' nThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
' q  h8 C1 d4 ?' B* n; n  Tand goes back to sleep.2 r6 n' t! Z( Z5 n) M- W

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!. V& u: U- D$ z1 y: Z
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the4 m% c7 q# U, C, Q7 H4 L

$ N: P* K4 s/ g- b8 G4 E>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two , s! Z  Z; E" U- N. O1 F
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason / Z3 R( n" ?6 ?7 \( b
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
8 ]; `! q+ [4 ?' J0 a3 M, [>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
5 i# l( s$ K6 C( `>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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% j( L1 l$ q, J+ s- V4 _% Q>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research : E2 d. F4 J2 D+ |8 ^
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
2 w5 `- Q. n* [: b8 I& j>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more   w; }9 ~, A1 c1 p* n# w$ z" d
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
; K, z, F; x' B: ]( h. x! S/ u" z>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three+ ?6 F/ _  C$ c1 Z# D5 ]- x. d

+ ~; E1 ^* B$ |) ~. K( K>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's   Y" I% b/ z" o& g& x
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
1 `" i- f  O' N& r  V5 G* T>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 0 e' ~8 V! B! w
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
5 h5 m( s+ F% J- v7 aA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a2 g9 a; c# r1 p) ~! `0 Y
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
, `8 e5 F' k8 j- A1 z2 [' @& zthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
% E% J6 f0 W6 Dthe newfie would l ...
) ]6 t3 \9 }( e1 x1 i
* ]6 \/ g8 A( L0 J# A9 l2 r
4 e2 N; G7 ?  y3 h" d
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:, c0 y9 F3 z5 p1 M6 I
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,, B( G0 @5 u7 P& I; I3 k4 l% h
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
! J! n; s+ A( e  C6 i2 ^加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
9 O4 l" D1 {, S  z2 U3 r
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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* K& P) B: I5 `1 J3 ^! r, l7 c% x" y9 {" a, B" r
! B  [- R7 Q# T
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
" s" U8 j! l8 F& s7 e1 J* V“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,% T5 ?& o5 D* U% Z2 O! n2 U2 O3 c
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
+ M2 q5 o! C+ t. z, a3 ?6 K8 w
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
  e) {' p) W5 ^0 b0 n3 H: M5 E+ [
; V( \  }. r5 `7 c, {  ]真聪明,偶像啊
4 x; \2 o# K$ d& ?" r/ `

% M' B! S2 o1 p" j. ^全盘接受一下。
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发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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5 m1 I  K  d6 @$ ?  O
全盘接受一下。

2 W+ T  m" K3 a真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 8 N$ \1 T! w2 p  J: _: N
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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1 y9 c9 C7 c+ q7 q
: Y/ F# Z, n# [+ u别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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" o/ b3 C' z$ W# }
2 |, [" C  M& ~别把我往坏路上领啊。

, K  L& ?) a& R- d* q你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 8 J# k: i" V5 ?" s) v
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
7 U! `+ u, E! ?$ i1 l% g4 X/ v( F
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 # r4 ]7 n/ _  w) p7 _. f
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真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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! R+ C. e. U8 ~; h9 O, x大学教授哦,能不剥削?

4 J+ R% F+ S  P2 s9 q5 \9 L% s) M. S她是大学教瘦?; c: j: S# g$ _" W6 j0 y
大学教胖还差不多
& m6 h- `  K: Z% r她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
, I: Y2 d3 U, v$ P紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

( v6 n% ^0 z/ c6 D' m: a$ a- K说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
  k9 E& N$ p1 M( K5 _" `8 b7 d( g# ~5 I2 h紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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