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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
' Y  h8 a% B; _$ ], X- tlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
, c! k4 F' Q1 P' ?. K3 z9 A/ ?that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if4 o) m9 }5 }* ^, `
the newfie would like to play a fun game. " s4 q: M1 I1 z9 u: z+ z/ Q
  : v: b. o! f5 ^1 R7 R
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
1 K5 C' h0 q& ]: k: J he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
1 F/ @% f+ e) u" A1 D lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
" Y' a& y* D6 k& N% d. S; n& Y- hask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,9 p& i# ~: A% @
you pay me only $5.
9 ]) R; {* q3 K5 ]- ^
" ]# T0 u: T0 V) m You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I* T/ W0 b  p+ N$ g% K! U
will pay you $500. * n# o/ \# E8 j) J- a( r# M; ]

0 y+ D) k& s( J7 ]" Z This catches the newfie's attention and to keep: ~0 G5 N" J" n8 y
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. * C' n1 z: E: L5 |; K0 @. e
" u' V! U6 i5 M: r% T4 j0 u) V
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
2 k. W9 }8 E( w- ?6 Ythe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
  t0 g/ D6 f( ?2 d4 o$ n
/ O$ o6 Q+ h1 z/ `# VThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
! k: q" O  p( l6 j2 Zpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
' ^6 T7 H2 d# x* T  llawyer. 8 ~) u0 A0 `% G' ^
+ \( o! y0 j" T6 W
Now, it's the newfie's turn.# ?* K) x+ q8 e3 L% k9 J6 u' a8 s' E

/ \$ h& ?- y  U  {& JHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with; I6 }! S, ^& T9 N8 B/ w* S+ f. o% q. t
three legs, and comes down with four?' 9 i% d. j0 a5 z% ]# J; P
! ~7 a) E" C0 l( Y
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all6 |9 X, Z* T) A) U$ _+ r
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all! K& b7 u7 j7 @0 r( G) r. G
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour" i" y9 \+ h/ |4 u) _' C
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and7 u; {0 _& a' ]' S( h$ T0 d
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right8 k' g3 |' y  g( s  w  ]8 o8 M; H5 n
back to sleep. 0 L+ v/ H- O$ O( W  W$ Z

: ]6 x# V- r' WThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
" g$ N1 h' i: a; j! r. f. Ywakes the newfie up and asks, 5 [: f/ s) X5 b

% F7 e9 C: k' r4 D; @'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
4 w$ S# o8 q; J! a# Icomes down with four?' ( d6 v9 L/ I/ `
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5+ ^# J# {3 ^5 E( A1 t9 H
and goes back to sleep.4 U7 R  g( _6 f) x- z

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
2 _: U8 i% `) s) O4 g" v( `  [
4 c% ~; [! w1 c0 h- c7 [/ t8 DLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the8 w! ~  l- p1 g: I" A# J

# Q: i# Z& K- s# m0 ^. t# C* L>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two + N4 z8 t' _! z) D8 N) ?
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason * d5 Q# m1 d$ j
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the " Z/ l' h# f* G6 E7 H8 j: v; n
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
" b& a* B, _1 p, {: V" V>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
& v+ v+ s0 ~: W4 ]( [" A+ o; `9 H: L) g, U0 A: I
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
9 t5 t. T3 B2 U8 ~! B) E>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
  F+ O0 w. l: H6 c9 J2 y0 f8 X. L3 X>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
; \% ^  s. q7 M: [  ^6 _>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
# S! ~7 B% C8 D$ r$ H5 p>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three& z! S2 l0 [, _& q! {2 T- z# u

2 p% O/ t" h7 \: U>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's , ^, K$ H4 l! {' C0 ]
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
7 c  Z/ x, g" N+ M>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
# Y. ~- r' q9 z% q$ S" m>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
( T$ d! v0 h! W. H  RA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
8 `/ R$ N% X$ [long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
& C. N4 [( g" |# w7 [that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
# U" R5 x& E/ T( Qthe newfie would l ...

2 M- U- C% q- r  \
8 M, K3 M" k2 R+ K  {! A, T
$ Q1 }4 @6 j$ J* C2 `好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
6 V; D5 _; t1 U  _* i“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
' O! g0 c. u; N5 E: J3 x好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
) y5 k# N! z/ O# T" b  {  C& r8 C加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
" o  t6 R! h' }& N; R. W
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 $ h- {- @$ j. C$ @, |
, Y7 w8 u' j( v9 u' U
1 o0 N% J! [' d5 s1 N5 T

7 b9 M2 e& H+ U- N好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:5 y8 ]- l8 D: ~9 |9 I- q! S! x
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,2 R* I& ^1 K. ]3 F
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
0 z* S* n+ O7 u8 g$ c. t
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ' C& o1 p$ N1 F+ J! Y$ A

/ `5 F3 b# s' p, ], U真聪明,偶像啊

& c. F" J0 p8 G" F, P0 I4 Q
7 I6 ]' M% _1 P" T- K0 X全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
* g3 r; _, O6 Y  A; ?1 V: O
. S/ m" r. _. _  E8 \' {( r& G* {! z7 f5 b  ^2 O- f. B+ P
全盘接受一下。
* _) B! z/ z/ e3 u
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
( I$ @  g- ^6 f! R3 c, Q
( ~, B" C% z. G; ^真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

2 \' e; j  p2 B/ S- R% K" L$ Z) |$ h6 ^# j

' J2 O0 e& f% S  `3 V0 a) A5 v别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
2 Z. p: Q+ b: N  N; z4 V) P2 f4 @3 Y4 o

% t1 _5 D( q; F7 s5 v+ B2 r+ `) M( `6 O( f( S
别把我往坏路上领啊。

+ g5 V( {/ D3 N你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
: T/ c9 n1 R: X2 G3 W加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
- @+ d' ~: G! Y/ \0 n, m4 ]
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
! S8 r' T) R  }) y, x+ I: n+ ~
6 l: m- g# o# q3 D" l' }0 M+ U真博学,偶像啊。

( Z. z; J8 M6 S) l, y% a, ?6 r大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 5 b$ ^3 `3 B* s, T( _9 \
) {* [4 F# f% Y
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

$ m9 C# d) ?$ c  z: a8 T6 X她是大学教瘦?- q' l' B6 s+ _
大学教胖还差不多 ; i$ O( N( n; M7 u% U
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
! d. S+ }" u* I& z紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

* D- _4 ]8 W5 ]3 j2 C说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
  E$ ~7 p2 W: E  e  d6 ]紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
1 Z; |( n$ m( M2 e
* Z! {: B1 K0 M% b6 o( C
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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