埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 6154|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
' V! _2 P% O5 @8 C5 k9 `long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
3 B( b5 c! l+ w! i  A. j  O9 \that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
7 ~& I" w# U* a* J; h+ mthe newfie would like to play a fun game.   z2 L7 O( g/ u( ^% R' L0 n
  ) A  d# k  j  z! z5 ?$ K
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so3 Q. B# \6 i# x4 b3 t' X
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
0 Y) m7 F' L* f% |" p& z lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
: Z) @. Q; @3 o% X) kask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
" q- o! v, p, d# a, uyou pay me only $5.
' }5 Q+ o. O' \1 R; U6 Y1 |, @
+ e/ E. d; \6 ]  _8 W! y You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I6 p3 S9 ]  c* h
will pay you $500. 2 x; a/ N; Q4 \' R. i1 P
! u/ v  f6 `/ u/ }1 n
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
3 v6 M$ ?3 Q; P2 _1 h' y4 gthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 4 F6 R  Z  a; h: ^7 B
8 a  L. O, w+ }$ B
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's1 D; n$ ?3 ^9 Q/ Q
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
. F0 P" k' t* m8 X
0 E0 S+ Q8 w" T8 h3 v$ K! XThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
6 ]' _" B# b5 P  Mpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
7 i7 Z# Q) b$ ^, f. @lawyer.   U- H0 w  ]5 y4 \1 i

. W% A5 N( o: \4 g4 X# M1 hNow, it's the newfie's turn.7 Z5 ]8 ^. N1 L

/ o/ a, {4 {8 `6 }; M% mHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
" E* _. b7 Z* r+ ~& {6 B; A* @) Rthree legs, and comes down with four?' + f; f( |( N6 |7 W) F8 m; F( `
/ H, l7 d/ V! T3 b8 L0 Z# t
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all1 z4 q0 N0 A- W4 u0 T
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
* K0 @# p+ I% c6 j2 b* v( n% Rthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
/ o5 ]& V- N: h6 ~of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and  a9 c# x! C: u5 J3 Y
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
* ]* \2 U( J7 W9 g5 [: Vback to sleep.
) v; d! j+ A' \" ?/ q+ d* [* ^8 y4 q4 k" Z( H! v; |- o
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He* v; j; A; L, f: Q0 t; J
wakes the newfie up and asks, 5 A  N% M" N# t
. T$ v6 h3 i" z- V6 T' d) A
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and. e$ I1 {5 V. p4 _1 ^
comes down with four?'
& U7 s$ P: |* B+ n- B4 ^: F' n/ c. t) I; ^  Z$ f7 w5 a
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $50 K/ k" U3 [0 h2 @& k) [! G
and goes back to sleep.. j3 @8 a$ z$ Z! C5 t
8 I, @* [; t( z1 G  o4 Q4 P! y$ |
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!9 i# l8 s: C$ E- ?, G: `4 o0 w

! n/ @4 [2 a& h, u) T9 W6 V3 Z; ELawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the# ?9 ~/ J( t4 S, ~! `/ Z6 e

, I) h1 u8 m7 w1 |>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
+ Q; G& S% s3 |( P% l>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason * t+ Z2 H$ E- F0 P
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
$ n9 {; g4 Q  Z- n- j; f! A>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, $ @$ N# w4 }3 e7 ~
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct# Y3 `6 @0 Z; c) f
; h3 W; q5 }! `
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
& j0 a0 s' S7 d# P5 c5 A>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
3 h0 E# f% r; \8 z>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more - \6 ^  n, c" }# F- J/ D+ f8 a! ^
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, % ~2 r0 p  s, S: h0 N2 j, k/ M
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
) a, _, `/ Z( R. }3 d' M* T% c  b4 r5 E: n7 [
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
  v1 H4 n8 O  H5 y5 M- t& E>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
2 x% i6 t5 `2 {+ W! n) V* E>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand - U* x+ ^1 {. D+ ]/ B/ N+ ]
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
: l5 [5 X5 O% T' ?' J% JA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
8 ?: G$ B( g$ @! x2 C* Blong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb* K  B1 b! ?0 a# ~7 X3 b
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if. x, V1 v- O  N7 o
the newfie would l ...
$ }+ H+ _& `0 Q2 a' `

' p9 A$ L3 q, X+ ]$ q  L/ A5 c- ^. I$ E
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
6 w) r2 ~$ q6 ~7 X8 h“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,$ k6 `# I' R& f- {& d9 E, Y8 U
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
4 J2 j$ Q  g7 |* X3 T+ \/ [5 J; g加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

+ j3 K. b* [& s; R* E: {4 r+ h真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 9 w( ?9 ~- d) ^% K
0 z, \3 v; }8 Y
9 Q! {& t& [6 {# C7 c  K6 Q
+ ~/ t. W8 m4 J; @1 M: s# g9 I
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:7 W7 D4 t6 r0 [2 Q+ Q! z5 I
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,' f. \) A1 O5 j6 j; e& c( {
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
: F# \6 I6 [6 ^5 i( ]
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 6 S6 W3 X8 v8 l7 m4 n) y! X/ c! Y
4 r6 q3 `/ j) Z- W
真聪明,偶像啊
; v' j, Y1 n/ X4 n) O3 p

  ~: n4 T9 X* n2 t5 F全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 9 Q* q5 u4 A2 D$ _; m6 P

4 r0 ]3 A% X- R. p- Q" i- {( I( s9 x0 t' G* F% J. v  i( r5 `
全盘接受一下。

  i% \' w. J5 v- c& Z真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
. h  _' ^9 s* }8 k3 z
1 B0 [) T! i; L+ r8 ?真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
7 F0 @( K9 R1 j, t; w# [. t% k

9 Q9 J$ X5 f) F+ A" M0 n5 f* S0 M: N& w% e+ R
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 3 f, _0 w" B# C

7 {8 J3 u- \% L1 _8 B# F( @4 ]  N

( ^, B7 p3 O7 l; u别把我往坏路上领啊。

0 x# J3 ]9 p/ W, s- G3 K+ y你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
$ P# N3 I$ B- O加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
5 x! P2 r2 A! `7 q& d$ a
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
2 c/ s( `. j8 K; a9 w- d9 c" r* @! q6 f" f
真博学,偶像啊。

" C2 W; s, f9 j2 n: H8 ^( R9 @大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
% K: `8 F& p, H  r, |8 v. I; s( e! w' U
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

7 m5 t5 Z* `9 c, l9 @. K她是大学教瘦?+ k8 V8 k8 D( B2 o
大学教胖还差不多 8 {! M  ?! {% Q" `, r
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 8 `( A/ D1 T0 T$ L) n4 R
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
- |  c0 k2 A$ s2 u% e  H1 C, S" T  F
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 * m0 A" i5 |. [+ C9 q. l% W. E
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
+ V1 J& s' M8 m4 g
; T# J$ j7 d) F: l
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-9-22 17:01 , Processed in 0.271727 second(s), 28 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表