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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a7 j* }- Q+ i3 W& b; G$ }$ W* P
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
; J. b7 F7 O6 n( p3 ^that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if/ _9 K. }2 K% Z5 J" B
the newfie would like to play a fun game. ' w) ^! g/ j: }2 j
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so% s  q  U2 A2 U8 I. a; ?* Y
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The7 [$ Y9 l1 @3 v" m
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I1 k' |. S$ c2 L8 q; y
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,1 O1 Z2 Q) n2 j5 J
you pay me only $5.
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. ?* ]5 T# j7 Q) L% o' Z# e& m You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I7 E8 |0 q4 t. b$ ]7 i/ U- ^
will pay you $500. ' b: _) G9 l; K* f) x$ ?0 }

8 |; v8 [# S6 E& ]/ K, B This catches the newfie's attention and to keep4 i/ T9 o  w: U3 M5 C
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ) v1 k: i) d/ {: l" {, q5 i8 Q  p

- A2 d, F6 e" _5 \  [The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
" b% {# S0 j0 r7 r/ \9 Q3 [- tthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his8 @4 ~7 J, G  K9 e' E
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the' m% a( b7 M6 @% {+ P
lawyer. ! W7 e. ~1 k5 B- \( e1 W- Q

1 h( d& @, i& h/ m# @7 a/ WNow, it's the newfie's turn.1 G" e( q: B3 _; P) M! a
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
$ @- c+ B, x& z7 hthree legs, and comes down with four?' + a- ^$ y5 I! F/ k  {' C
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all( a* E4 T4 p! f, i9 K
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all4 i5 C6 d) y7 @
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour; K3 D9 _7 T  y- X1 W9 T% ?) ?
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
6 \. ?2 k8 _+ Q8 l+ Y1 D  }1 I  |hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
, |" ^- W9 ?  L. v" C; i) S0 Lback to sleep. " d$ E$ K7 k: E
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
3 h4 r- x! D: X2 `wakes the newfie up and asks,
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'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
' u6 ?3 h: i: n- }  ?comes down with four?'
$ [( L( y3 Q* D7 K1 s7 `5 k" Y
6 [$ @  |* a6 k! R2 pThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5" g) @( W1 N( l" Y: M" l
and goes back to sleep.
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$ s& k" a2 c  i, t
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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9 w: B. A- I8 Q8 D6 wLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the! y4 |7 B# Z4 b4 n% Y; z" {- y# b
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 0 r9 D* Y) A- C8 @
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
+ l% O5 }! R: h# ~>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the : p9 d% g2 G3 b# w$ k
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 5 L- g1 c: ]# n8 [" j' H
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct' ~# v. s" ~! V/ L% O0 j8 U7 M

8 D; B+ X! J: a& \; a>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research # r- }1 W$ ]/ l
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
' e9 ~' ?, C. Y8 R' P$ q9 l* b>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
0 q, x% n( [! a0 n. B>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 7 B: ^1 y3 R: j+ K& b2 ?0 f
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three' Y3 @6 G7 Z, F% O$ N; L

* T1 P, i4 C( Z+ c  l>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
) t- d! t" Z( |, ~. j' Z( L; \" M>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
1 b1 _- g) t& I& ~) \. V: \>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 6 i# p: @; H* N# n2 G
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
9 S* A3 ?7 G6 eA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a! I; k: [+ J% s# Z$ K$ {: i
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
) ~: d% m, o& r0 Ythat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
) x# n1 n, I2 [1 i5 y5 R: }the newfie would l ...
9 V/ O; j/ R- d4 m

( ~, J' j9 i+ Z6 i$ Z
  F5 h) G6 c; P  e好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:2 r: N! I% `% Q/ {
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
2 e& @; V* Y5 h0 z+ d好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
8 t, T2 J2 x0 w  M加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
! i" v8 j' M) Z( ^$ t1 w* Z  m; r( C5 k: g
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2 P  d. \( A" W& y
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:" V  z" a& A" _' c) W
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,, _# U6 @* r: A$ I0 l; A
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

2 I" d+ I( K8 a, D真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
' L( b6 T6 N5 e' W. ^5 l6 k
9 ]/ y  I- a+ _0 C1 R2 s* g真聪明,偶像啊

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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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% R: Z# t( G9 p' B" t- f  p/ \; u- Z+ w
全盘接受一下。

, Z' R' y% p% _2 `4 {真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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/ o7 o, B' w/ y1 J3 g# {' b真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
2 t& O- G, G; R+ w; c

/ o' y( ]2 y( V* d( C: }
0 |' @* g- V* i别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
/ T. t. |" K( T: ^, ~1 u3 ^! |) t& A3 @
; A9 n) I( g" m& b
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别把我往坏路上领啊。

9 a! w$ k( x5 q你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
4 ~1 G2 s" e4 h8 C. q. E$ R) p/ C$ U加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

; r6 k( {: O8 ~) r+ [- _! b" q多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 + A9 `: f6 W  [; U1 X3 r! U& i
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真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
) J4 V. i) d( j8 U' F" Y2 y
" x! S; x( {0 y3 V( |% T大学教授哦,能不剥削?

- L. G/ |6 X  \) F" D她是大学教瘦?
# n/ a- C( n6 b6 V7 B大学教胖还差不多 $ q$ R2 F* O- E: b2 |! b
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
8 M3 H- Y0 Q( Z紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
' n. {) G  \/ ]- `2 R% Z8 J6 W" B5 h8 I
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
. l% o6 z' A: }紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
3 S7 u1 w, h+ |8 h5 H2 A0 g0 s
2 b0 m: r/ m. z. q! c. \3 H
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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