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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a0 o: H* @* x9 o  S
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb- G( E& t. _0 f# s
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
8 s5 W& T% O2 y8 |- ~' c$ {the newfie would like to play a fun game.   U# F8 A* [4 p3 W4 {; X( Z
  
7 ?% e4 s& r9 `  h7 u0 ^: t The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
0 f! b; s; F; d+ E- c4 s# o he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
. q, F$ S1 q' H/ p& u2 [ lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
" `* |3 T1 ?8 L4 task you a question, and if you don't know the answer,$ v. B% u$ H5 I* M$ E0 v
you pay me only $5. 3 {# k9 |  S! s6 E4 I8 f( s

) j. |* U& A  K4 q% J+ [2 y You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
  U3 Y6 i3 Z) P. |2 I( h8 b will pay you $500.
% }1 ^7 ~7 T3 X" b- Z# m7 h
: Y1 K) a+ k0 L1 O) Y( m0 ? This catches the newfie's attention and to keep' T7 w0 F) e( F5 Q
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
" A8 p& s* `! f4 \8 i' D! Y; V$ h6 U* }/ R# [+ O0 h# l
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
4 n+ f' J. j" H% }6 Kthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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0 r* o) ~( w8 C' c" J# qThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his5 {% z. e! q- ]6 d- K: s
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
) I( O) B/ d; Xlawyer. 8 ~4 K: Q* P7 Q2 u8 y! T1 ]

8 i3 m3 C: \3 o# w# Q) v$ f2 WNow, it's the newfie's turn.
" ?( @7 f: i+ |1 K
' r' k  V1 n, f# V$ PHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with$ W9 R" I0 g* |# W8 J- K
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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( v$ M4 Q5 F7 C; z. ~7 zThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all: D6 N+ L  B; I8 }8 @+ ~" {
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
7 t7 b5 ~6 L8 \6 w* Z- t6 sthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour8 D8 ~( N) h1 s
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and1 Z! h9 g) I, o7 ~. H
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right5 x6 s* H' X7 B9 w9 T7 f9 Z
back to sleep. - `( g6 d; e* i; B
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
4 P! h' y6 u1 c- ^+ r. @. F7 wwakes the newfie up and asks,
* l- j/ E" d2 ^: e
. q; C: A, r0 ?  e+ k'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
' \! K, f$ \. r$ N1 E$ u1 q- j$ [comes down with four?' * k7 f1 b! I: R+ K8 [6 T
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5' T- o# q7 h' A; G$ Z
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the) N/ ~4 D* S8 \1 R5 n

+ b! E+ q0 S% x, n" k, x8 v>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 3 A4 r6 a" J. s' P2 N# }- B
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
& o$ ~* ^% R  Y' @6 x) J>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the . ?" c' `& R# {; o: |
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, - ]& [# n5 t. V' Z
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
# U% ]: P  Y* q
. d( u* [  Y. E! n>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
$ S- G5 T$ c/ m. B>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 2 d; Q& V3 H/ {8 D1 o
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
) }7 u6 h1 _$ w1 I0 \2 d: R>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 9 j" _  Q; F' E8 l% t" \
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three, u8 Y+ x1 M% [% j  V( u
+ \% p6 Z5 j) A9 G/ ^
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ! Q2 }/ h6 @+ U+ S" Y( G3 Z- h( D
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
  A9 S) v, v0 ?- k; U7 o>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
3 F% R4 {! U3 H0 I9 M' p0 Q( \>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
" n. [5 D% P- N- Y6 OA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a  v& {  L7 Y% O6 b' O  \7 I& m
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb3 ^; \: |# I( N0 r; T& q
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
5 u- c  I5 j3 T- [$ g; ~4 jthe newfie would l ...

8 f3 j: d8 f4 P' S  n
$ x: X0 \0 F: y% c8 g- r* `8 }
4 {8 U  W8 D- a  D* U& m4 Z( {+ i好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
: \" G/ t0 t0 w" G9 f8 R6 u“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
+ q/ C* N8 g7 ~) u好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 : r3 a4 p  J9 v1 e* A: b# v6 n5 J
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

8 v/ x5 e9 D) y( V2 ^- E9 q6 R- E真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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0 W2 o* w2 I( }7 C& N3 B9 J9 k& Z4 V% ]# X
7 I: K+ o4 f5 p; S/ r& \# I* a! G
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
+ ?. g: o9 C# @; E1 Y7 j0 R% G“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,$ w8 e7 v& K" H  p3 E
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
1 _# N4 ~# H2 I
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真聪明,偶像啊
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; I8 k* t0 T  f9 I9 {全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 . r8 v# }, K1 l

7 P* m) f$ u  X
4 V8 u4 c5 L8 a* c% N2 {全盘接受一下。

/ w- V9 d9 e6 g- G; O真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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2 f% U; \, w% l+ @1 D真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ; P7 j4 X: c4 o% M
  |3 C: J/ f' T+ ^5 J

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% V5 J6 p, ~# X别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 * O! _5 e0 H# e
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 . s: G+ o. y! Z+ g

' P" T  V5 @0 m7 K0 S真博学,偶像啊。

& U3 h6 i: Y6 I大学教授哦,能不剥削?
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ( p  J+ q" }9 d5 }+ h, [7 `
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?5 r& \# j% e2 O" ]# Z1 s
大学教胖还差不多
* a2 n$ n2 }5 l, _3 E& u$ J! r她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 5 t5 e* [) A' k( d+ s
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ' C$ G9 I0 P' x; y7 l: G. n
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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