埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 4985|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a3 z( b6 ]/ S, [7 G. h
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb& w- @* A2 z/ ~* Z( ?
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
# q' X" N# U: t# l" L9 mthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
# @5 g5 C  Z/ E+ A  " n' j4 P$ F0 [4 H; x3 w
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
. C6 q# W. H! q6 { he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
1 F! K) \* X8 i- R lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I! t# l3 V/ b+ Q& n" p$ L! V2 a
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
* x" B. D9 A, |1 X  {, syou pay me only $5. % a8 E& J% ?7 a$ A
6 W; O  D; g. v+ g# ?
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I* H2 m# O/ x& E3 P- ]* {
will pay you $500.   W$ U) `( _3 D/ t! I

: V) V8 |& e' P, j4 T This catches the newfie's attention and to keep. T% h- A* P' d$ k( t: x
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 7 V4 }3 P, A8 a7 f9 u% b

' H+ e! X% H* c4 PThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
& B- |$ k, E/ a9 c4 Uthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'   M7 C0 Z. N( C, |+ j* Q
4 u8 t/ x7 v: ]
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his5 m# U7 z& t* ~2 N- t
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the% e) t% U; X! j
lawyer.
( A& z7 Z; ?' s" T7 n' {
! A5 Q  l, A; H0 K' X3 E  hNow, it's the newfie's turn.2 l1 C: X& w0 r4 g+ Z  q
# @  y: T, j6 t; H' X; R/ U/ N
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with5 S* w7 p( g( }/ Q3 b+ v6 e
three legs, and comes down with four?'
# z3 Q( c1 Y8 f1 {
/ B1 I0 a$ p) P+ Q; g4 m. Q3 ?The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all5 T) y) \* }% V: I' ]* C
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
3 C3 N% n" G4 ]8 N( S5 T' g/ B4 N1 Vthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour2 q" L, @" M5 w: H
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
7 S9 C) s3 m7 M, }4 S$ rhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
7 u5 V6 w$ `4 W' k" fback to sleep. 2 S) \) e7 }0 @1 T1 I% T& G
/ Z1 ]0 R* Z, M1 {4 Z
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
7 h/ ]# M/ x2 j2 c2 P" Lwakes the newfie up and asks,
2 U, a- t1 K3 h* G. u) n* }. }5 z8 H1 {& O6 o& q
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and" z2 `1 U9 u! p1 [( Q% J
comes down with four?' 3 _/ B: N) w' d: ~' o
2 H, t! T/ u  F
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
  ?: T( r! J9 C% \, G  L, i  f& Mand goes back to sleep." A/ a. t! I" @3 _& q! ^

9 w& H+ @6 j- }4 z- H& H
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
0 Y! i. I/ V- M* P0 O+ o- ]
+ j* K5 o% S, e  d' R9 }7 kLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
- |( z) L' d2 Z3 s# M: q, L  ]4 g5 V; f" P. G' ~
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 6 S; k5 K/ T2 U
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
* B' x/ F8 h4 t) A" o1 r>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the ' W/ l% s% W' j
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, % x9 o2 e( w9 v# b4 m3 y
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct& A4 C3 X$ E: F& E7 j

7 f" S* T1 K3 ^# s. C>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research : A# p7 _! q/ l  a5 f
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
/ i7 Y2 q% {5 E>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 6 v1 G& V  ?6 S' f9 S3 ]' l
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, # k5 P; J2 k8 Y( g3 P
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
* v( G' m4 K0 o" K3 ]. c) B' h9 _% ?
* d9 [8 X( P& t>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's " F# O2 z+ W3 W
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
: ?! Q; P% P$ p/ `" ~5 l>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
$ [1 w7 m: M) j* [7 a& h. d. K1 d>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
. \+ x  M- s# iA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
; x3 J3 r$ m3 b1 mlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
* h3 A" W: q. A" G- d$ \6 R0 Hthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if! z7 ?) s6 ^) Y. Z. ~* w
the newfie would l ...
: h; F" E3 k  u3 \' ]: F
: o% C4 Q7 T/ X9 W4 d6 x( }6 J# D

% r: t6 i7 x2 o- ]好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:  s+ ~- G' ^8 R
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,' K. ?" n3 E3 a
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
8 I" F0 z' }: U: Q1 W加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
$ P* t! Z" j3 c' u: L6 A
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
) B, Z; J' z" Q$ x8 v5 b- V( q! A$ M, g7 }/ o0 `2 \8 ]
% n' @0 q8 G8 S4 A# g; ?* u
/ P( Q& M2 y) Z% a4 c  R
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
7 m  B( S9 g9 \4 n“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
. ]1 Q( X/ O: S0 G2 n好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
9 H8 }) p% m9 x, |  Y. O* D
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
+ I+ v1 R  C5 B0 j- G; Q3 \" y; V. F( @9 Y
真聪明,偶像啊

; I3 r% r/ i1 x6 I4 a& A$ v% G0 [9 N4 N' k: u( ]% L1 |
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
! i  @' c/ F1 B" E/ E! w2 t8 M6 B, _" T
2 f) B3 s" O+ J9 r0 G% Q. O4 i  ?
$ U* Z, c8 M1 f( u+ N8 {7 H, p" x全盘接受一下。

0 e' h; N+ X' M9 H+ [2 [真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表   [: K! r7 j2 C8 i8 `, L" ^

+ p) I: e  i6 @' J. S2 n  w4 Z8 f% u真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
/ H3 C% K' o8 v- o! r) L

; G1 O6 {* O" ~+ ^
+ w: X# _. ]5 @别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
  \8 Y& }, H! B, v  h$ e' K4 K
' M& a+ S$ |% t( Y
5 G2 M+ s% g, v$ Q: [0 h6 p: G3 q% f! ~. X" C( A' U
别把我往坏路上领啊。
8 y7 e6 R1 N) S; u  M! u# ]
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 & X& F2 n" W$ w; r
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
, N# c! B5 \1 r. Q& ^/ }
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
5 N9 y& `  {) R  Y4 B, H% z$ v$ b* Z+ ^5 Q1 Z. A' g
真博学,偶像啊。

0 f  B. M& u/ i* t: n) A6 S大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
+ w0 Q1 O) `6 @2 y% V" ?' @9 \  B$ v6 ^
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
) o5 q5 D- ^8 ^6 J) d
她是大学教瘦?; O8 y2 Z# B) h+ c7 g
大学教胖还差不多 / p" U$ f/ l0 i0 C% `
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
0 n) b3 A1 V+ U; _4 H. i. K: s紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

$ w2 H" Y. R( W7 R说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 6 \5 e* ?3 K, }
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
2 ]  W# ^9 C9 v  i* c
0 R6 c  K! T# A+ J' p, L0 k
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
理袁律师事务所
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-4-3 17:50 , Processed in 0.208280 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表