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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a* p  x3 N1 {$ X  U+ K+ E% u, o/ m5 M
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb; ^3 @; p" H# }- l% \& e* I  x5 N5 D
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
7 p! d9 Y! k8 r- a4 z; ?the newfie would like to play a fun game. 9 l; _; h- O) r3 p/ x- x
  ) ?( d& H/ V1 G- i+ \9 x  B8 ]
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
: J9 ]8 Q0 }7 s& W6 ]( I/ i* k he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
4 |* Q! [, m# W% n0 B lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I0 K0 ~2 F  K# o3 }5 b) ~* p) O
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,* L' f2 u5 ?1 x" [$ e
you pay me only $5. " g" M" B7 F- Z$ l- t! S% N

) l0 J: |8 V0 o2 W: e  H You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I8 ~' I1 x# E/ g+ X
will pay you $500.
4 _+ @3 u! f0 H" e1 D- _# l! |( F6 v
/ v& W+ P2 w8 t5 L( H# R/ ` This catches the newfie's attention and to keep+ M& t8 F! B- i, b, D
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 5 [( b* v) J1 s- c: y8 k% S
8 C0 X% T( z- f$ k
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's; r8 o4 [1 ~6 V. j
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ' ?1 {0 G, ?: T& K8 C' S6 c5 q

( E2 C$ K6 A( O0 T8 }0 X" g  dThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
2 W0 L* T7 W# H! }& kpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the- N# r/ t6 [- g  n) h' Y3 }
lawyer. ) b3 s+ O: F! c# `8 ?
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with) P$ O1 G# D: h" q( e& m* Q: X$ C
three legs, and comes down with four?' , v) s9 {3 C# {8 @; F

' F  f# `3 b0 XThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all- [* \8 h' i1 z* h1 P
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
7 ^  D: u4 v$ w# G9 ^the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour# C) C+ q' Q( k, ^
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and5 s7 a4 x+ M# Z* j" a6 g1 e+ k- T
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
7 f6 Q& Q. Y# \' p, A# \back to sleep. 1 w3 }2 f" v8 ]
' k7 D. V! F# d8 W' ]7 J0 r
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He6 O, e* @, l. |" j- {2 Z
wakes the newfie up and asks,
4 W6 ~0 w, V: s3 S* q2 l* y  `0 Y$ F* Z
& x$ ?1 I. ]7 o$ [$ z% T& x. P'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and9 e+ }( m$ B/ D7 P) {
comes down with four?'
, A* k' R# _0 L1 p
5 u9 k" @4 \* G/ u7 d! H' @( FThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
. o) `! i: f- Y, ^* N" o- V/ Kand goes back to sleep.& Q2 @) N, r5 b6 c" t

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!8 a, x# j) t/ f4 Y, j

; y) Y8 Q& ]! l, [+ g/ R8 uLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the# Q8 S' e6 K* p

+ k: ]- z, e5 `>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
& z% K. B" T/ G" d4 E>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 2 M1 S4 t$ C0 J
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the ) I" D8 H4 {, E/ K: {
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, . C8 ^8 M+ M/ K! n$ t& Q: h
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research : E; K+ Z$ Q* E( o% G1 @3 O
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
- ^5 R! A9 I1 E4 V9 v9 \/ p>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
% q; Z7 p$ |; c+ u>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
+ M% b( ~! ?7 g>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
4 [& V( b* T2 B* w( L2 H0 t/ E>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
, ^) F: c2 R. I1 T: a4 c8 F; Y" ]' }>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand + l. s( K9 k5 D, @6 o/ i
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
6 {4 ?: I/ U7 t0 X( _A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
0 \  X2 q0 \, \$ Flong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
2 X. o' o/ J' y5 I& ?0 {that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
7 @. p" l4 t- h8 F% x6 q2 i' K+ ^the newfie would l ...
! J7 w) ~' N7 ?- a7 {2 k

/ T* U* z5 u) g1 J7 A% ~9 P
) k8 n  `1 s. \好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
3 R5 _. |, r* J. J  p' \“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,+ ^. d# ^- d0 ~( {" N2 e
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
8 M$ V: y" b1 x/ D/ `) E加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
* _. }; w- j; z$ R; b# L* @
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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1 f% p" i( h2 N. A' R0 s/ f
2 |: D& z: _% R
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
% \. w6 [' j- ^$ w, d% i“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
! |& y( {5 N9 F" Y好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
  t; L0 v* m, y2 P4 O2 z# Y' i* e
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
2 h& |; Z: r9 @9 b2 J
+ f6 y2 F7 u% l, a' u7 c& k' f1 }0 g真聪明,偶像啊

0 l# F1 L0 ?- g
# [5 N: f5 a) l全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
8 B: {2 ?# \' r2 _( F
- r* }+ v( e, ^( f; H$ X9 I( }0 c
# M, S% r( q+ B  `# Q: g全盘接受一下。
' y, R+ y4 {" [4 A: l
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 / U. Z6 K, X. m8 B1 Y

; [0 n- L# X8 a6 H. T, b; K真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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. ?* t* z) A, L) i( \
/ w! ]9 z# @) I+ l别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 5 P- N  p0 s" J1 m! o  k. ^

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别把我往坏路上领啊。

! e2 \$ ~" E/ v% q/ \+ K, i你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
" L, q/ c3 p0 b9 j; o加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
* u% Q$ ]0 K, r
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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' U6 U3 v' S: [/ c, A! ?真博学,偶像啊。
) {4 z$ g+ j+ i2 q. T% q9 {
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 3 }; j9 ~; ?1 \  f
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
4 o. `; S& `- G  Q# C
她是大学教瘦?
4 s% t! h! \, h1 @6 T2 d$ L# R大学教胖还差不多
. y8 [( }' n2 z! |& n她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
) b& U: w9 [! |. r( I' N紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
) A' \1 ~% g) R
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ' e' X* o! ~" f/ X# z# ?8 e
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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5 ]) t3 d5 G- p
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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