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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a9 {, [1 J4 Z1 l; c: ~1 P9 l  O
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
4 I& v4 r- Z6 o0 Q' bthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if8 ^2 S" ]2 ~9 C
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
/ E: y# ^  ]- l0 M( o he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
% f4 F1 t" ]" l4 I lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I# `5 h6 Y7 g! r( R
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,5 r1 p& ?! `2 Z
you pay me only $5. 8 C# s: `2 \* ~: S: Y. Q
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I6 A0 a' s3 ~3 k. o, W8 I
will pay you $500. - s* C. Q2 q9 ^/ R

- e8 |0 g5 R" D! m7 v This catches the newfie's attention and to keep1 l  E/ B# Y- P2 L2 J$ M  [- m
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
& \4 ?. g3 P) _the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
, h" t3 C9 ~9 Wpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
3 X, `3 {" j) \" Y/ @3 M3 Mlawyer.
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.& p% D2 [* ~4 M" l' k5 |
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
$ I! g! K2 T1 j4 A' b& z2 Pthree legs, and comes down with four?' 4 K5 p0 z# l3 t; [6 W

: V, j3 ]) i( b; u" J) d! W( aThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all# v# ^: `. O* Y& c, R2 ^$ y3 p1 N
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all( w( M0 {& q8 y2 x5 z, h0 v" W
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
: P/ o0 X1 n8 Q& [" X8 \7 hof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and: P5 i# O, s& v/ p0 U0 J3 [
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right! e+ z; K4 Y$ d/ _" r2 Y% U0 a: _
back to sleep. ! r1 s) @% ?4 Q* w9 x6 [( B

2 [7 {: L" N) k9 {, y2 X7 Y) E( xThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He7 A' x8 N$ C  N' |2 o- ?
wakes the newfie up and asks, / P2 a9 b  R# V& z6 q. R

0 ?" g6 \( f0 V% {! O* T; y'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
0 A; u1 p; m4 c' Z2 a. Ecomes down with four?' ) u: ]5 u' ^$ f5 j2 m( J1 _
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
/ j1 l, h+ Z( oand goes back to sleep.* _7 {4 S, B( w5 |8 j, X

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!* Q' E) g* h9 @+ W9 j

$ O* K+ T" D' |  gLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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2 A* E5 n( s+ D2 A>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
6 A( l8 y/ n% E% F# S; r>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
1 F. c& e. I; X, y>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
% B8 X7 T1 x( F/ r1 w0 q>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ; H9 b' }$ G2 M9 v/ t6 b7 s
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 7 l( r7 f; C# `
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a $ t9 v. P2 p5 ~/ c3 L: P. \2 G) u/ s
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 8 Y. O$ Z8 H' o6 @, t, A) M
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, " ?2 B2 D  e" U* w( E' C
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three/ F2 H" }" W$ q2 |& k9 Z

8 I* n6 x; }4 W. r- o>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ( w% o0 P$ l8 m- l, w% ?
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
3 d8 Z1 \' \+ J3 \- Z>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
" |4 K, l; c2 T>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
2 R9 G" O# z$ C) n- Y6 W( o* |- fA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a, B/ g3 ~* |  H
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
' i3 v9 w5 X1 D5 ^! F4 T. m8 uthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
, K5 r1 U8 O, c9 W1 H% @) N. x4 ythe newfie would l ...
8 w' Y6 t; ]7 s3 |
# ?( [. q. A+ s) A

! Q6 F) f1 j! ~( c' Z: C好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
. r! `$ k/ P  ]  f8 `“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,# Z  Z: C- I# u
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 0 h% C. G) R+ C
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 / S0 N% i/ Z: V4 K

6 g4 z% L1 T- X7 I2 K! |% }, n, M/ K2 i8 F3 e
$ }: t2 o- {6 _) M, {. p* r* q3 w
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:/ m5 w! G* O. f
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,& o% b" V4 S( c% W
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

8 H- e7 }3 C9 V: J  Z真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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0 E& G" L" A6 I# A1 V) @& }$ f真聪明,偶像啊
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; U( h9 ]* \1 u7 y
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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3 Y/ Q! q1 o8 O$ v$ ]# r全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表   }7 S2 }* z8 l
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 5 z5 v& M7 q6 U

( B% \6 ~1 V; S7 y+ I! A' f) F( i; n" W( y
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ; K8 Q& r0 f9 v5 ]; m* ~7 @
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

' e/ j+ U( D: ]9 f7 V多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 9 N& H3 _# g& L) O  h6 ~

. H  N& |3 m" d2 N0 c真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 - C2 ^8 r- @! r, d) l  q1 R
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?( K2 s( B# \* y# ?! ~
大学教胖还差不多 + M, ]' |2 {; C6 q6 F" i1 E, d0 A
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 + P. |2 a, g# B0 ~& V0 o
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 - D1 V+ b" R" u
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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$ L! ~9 T0 J" c$ M: {- J哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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