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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a7 h! v/ C9 b* T- u/ n% K
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
9 a, Y  A  q& u$ y; {' W( \that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
7 g# ^  r  G) r0 nthe newfie would like to play a fun game. ( Z7 m# R: Q7 z8 l  Y
  * {0 {9 s$ R5 E7 w$ [
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so0 T9 ]) e# ~: S
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The* K+ X9 {; y1 i' Q9 L
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
; G8 ], o$ V  _$ D: A9 U. r* a: S# Iask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,8 N6 S. t6 w  Y7 k% Z* [5 t
you pay me only $5.
( h# c/ G6 _3 h" a
) Q9 x% C, y4 L& d# o You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I) k6 z- l" F0 \/ l6 ~' p8 g. _
will pay you $500. " c9 U2 b* @  v( f/ S

6 I; t& W4 J2 y  l+ I3 ]  I This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
- `9 n/ q9 l' H& t; ythe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 3 V+ a% @# c1 s4 |! }( D+ X2 T

% p# o  A- ~( m- V0 ~/ [- [. s' Y0 Q3 QThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
9 h0 L6 L. F, \% q. athe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his4 |  N5 l' \) n+ Z! n* `- a; p
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
( `4 g1 ]" g: {/ U8 Z, S3 Rlawyer.
6 N1 s1 _# p" k( w/ X- {
; K  q" U6 i& INow, it's the newfie's turn.
% {; N% c! V" H
4 C4 w+ m9 O6 |, t$ B0 OHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
8 m7 M7 L9 s0 z: U- [three legs, and comes down with four?' ; s; w% E; B% i

+ z* \7 Y5 f3 v, E, z$ iThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all# a1 c) J8 F2 F) |4 }
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
/ r& k. |: B+ W- sthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour7 _- v$ ^, G. u  i
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
- @5 j& Z6 B% Q" Y, whands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
, v0 ^: P; i9 [& R/ p/ Q" Pback to sleep.
, P6 X8 ^9 j0 l9 q9 x+ Q* y! U* Z. [( w- H, K2 c* ?: |
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
# E$ M% r* v  v0 `9 [5 owakes the newfie up and asks,
+ U! \# p3 U" R' T8 v: [' K# e. F  C$ R
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
6 v( g* [3 p( T, h5 }* K& Bcomes down with four?' - A6 r6 n$ x1 B# a: ^1 G( H

. P$ v$ F0 g3 u: DThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
. n8 I* r$ }; S9 O  C/ mand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!7 z/ n4 y8 ~& V& `' U0 j

5 T6 k, ?  j9 W0 [( N" QLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
: V2 _; ?" b0 P: w2 c9 u+ M>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
) x9 M! q# h; O: ?" f>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the " m8 p2 x) a, i, e
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
1 Q* K8 m1 [. W) x>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct6 K* I' r! h. [. F0 N8 Q; d- e

& K# M/ v" g% l# l1 G>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research ; w# P& A+ q3 C' T6 n1 [1 i0 E
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 6 e" y% M1 }9 f+ i6 c& Q
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
5 L5 Z7 K) o, ~9 F: Q>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 9 b  Y$ a# Y9 I, v. c
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three* y' I* I; |- z; z7 n7 F+ n
; b7 B+ n6 T0 s& J, S  {2 ^
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
9 e2 L: E; o3 y+ s' A$ K>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the ( B3 ]: B! A: g
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand ; y4 K$ n6 }* U9 y
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 & g' v* {( m5 `0 W/ |* n! @
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a6 t: L0 B9 C) w
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb6 u) r8 B4 @; [. }. n# J9 u
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
+ n" S' R4 Z% Bthe newfie would l ...

: F! w9 q1 ^6 G/ E9 U; n3 W" j' k7 x# |
5 P* c% j$ M1 B- j
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
! i: ~* P  E& F5 N2 _, @“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
: }% {& H* c: x# Z7 j好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
3 a3 _. h6 p9 T) _2 z2 Z加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

# u* n9 i: g6 v- t$ I, F# o真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 & |+ k3 M5 M! O2 U5 y

$ C; ~" S- H6 [& N! y0 Y7 t( x6 S0 W+ W; x- n
# z9 E! p1 z1 b$ `" @- g
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
$ z, B- H" |! a# X' \; r7 V“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,# o4 c6 ^# K( \% l1 |+ C7 G1 Q! z
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
  Y1 @& x8 [) D7 O# H" ^1 N
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 + s# c" Y/ J& r7 E- g

4 S$ u* i  m: S! {! U8 L真聪明,偶像啊
. V! v& t. W. z2 T% O& [& `

$ g, I* O& v: r8 A& g5 |全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
7 A: \8 I  m% M1 f" Q4 B
. a$ a) h2 [/ O& [+ P% h% n8 _. y1 S1 C  L: e4 |/ D: I
全盘接受一下。

' C! S9 |$ w, v: M: Z真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 % f6 B5 h+ D/ t
) n. }, _2 Q. o- b$ E& u
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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3 g5 t$ t* \, W/ u" l3 v
0 e" L- F" U1 Q8 B, n% N' i7 R别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ! H0 z2 q- }6 ?& _# K( l4 [. o; \

1 J7 f$ ]4 z, K. U, h2 W* z0 V' ?5 A5 T- ?9 c( ~1 z
5 Y0 U4 v  ^. V) u9 t9 X
别把我往坏路上领啊。

$ C$ T( l" q8 _# F' M& _0 p你已经在路上了
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 * J. y, z- D$ z1 z( J# j$ R
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

* q, o& |+ y; n1 Q9 s5 `多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
# G+ c* I1 c; B- J8 ?& j- _- D9 ]/ T+ }0 y& C1 s8 B; o( U
真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 1 Y0 _3 Q0 [) J* A% E

7 A) V" T7 B) `  j# i. j& ]大学教授哦,能不剥削?

, `+ [; v2 i9 B$ x她是大学教瘦?
1 m( `1 h! G) X7 S  e) }) R) d0 m大学教胖还差不多
3 U) x3 F1 T  [; u. p) V" d她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
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发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 $ N( a+ c3 d0 N
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

* ^8 |' ~0 U% n  ^说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ( c/ V9 }, q8 J- ?
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

! b2 B/ _7 W2 y( A0 }
8 Y: B/ _& M5 ]( R6 n哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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