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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a; U) m, c  v$ M3 @: t
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
9 ]8 ]( C2 {$ m, Othat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
; [9 ^$ U1 O* p7 L, z& @+ bthe newfie would like to play a fun game. 4 G2 }6 Z# ^' K% g/ C; ]* W/ g% |: y
  4 W; Z6 v, a3 a% Z. d5 v( X8 n
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
# b% ^' F( C2 ~7 M# {& j! i3 { he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The6 E& T. ?" t: x4 k/ k1 T" g% f( T
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
3 _9 m. V2 k( V7 C2 Cask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,: J& j+ N) A" Y& E
you pay me only $5. 3 a+ g. |, E: k* l
3 y- e( @) D( d; x5 ?6 {" w: y1 b
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I3 I( G+ O, W, I7 x( {3 ~
will pay you $500. 8 q  Z1 M& k0 n9 x
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
7 @7 w, J: s* n# d3 Gthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
$ I# d/ g& k/ h# P5 f
" I0 M. J3 B& {7 u' A' R0 I4 N1 xThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
; r% {* c( h( n# D' f* nthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' - _6 `2 t! l+ ]% f6 s
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his! e" m, D: Z- i- u8 F7 l
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
9 V+ M. D1 ~' d& _% ~lawyer. - S4 o3 h$ X. P8 I8 r) A. u  `

* ?$ E* z* s( n( a/ u; M* pNow, it's the newfie's turn.
! [2 T1 }5 x* X; I# F
% u  T' z6 U4 B, lHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with) |' N9 a; r; h" t
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
# x+ J/ Y, K- u8 u2 r5 L- wreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
% ?# X" n- u5 G- E2 @: lthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
2 N2 d5 o* P) zof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
% p+ `; f% l7 J0 |, |. `hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right' E) F) h/ |6 }0 i
back to sleep. ! ?4 x4 ^7 K$ ^" E7 P# g  U% y

  Y. X2 W! x7 N; z- N; |The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He8 q  [! v/ q% P
wakes the newfie up and asks, / F( @! Y# Z4 |6 M4 h  x4 c, |

- `% Q/ c$ A* U2 D'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and- s+ D8 C4 G+ o% o
comes down with four?' 7 z+ u5 J7 f' n- o2 Y- `

5 Y( _1 ], [& X$ H' R+ aThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
/ O- D( M4 b( {6 z# G4 v2 q9 ~and goes back to sleep.: Z# L0 L. B% |- d: b8 I6 C) m
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the3 N8 r3 d- N+ `! o& O; x, G; \: }
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
! G. i$ W: q3 O" x>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 1 v( h$ H+ a% `+ {
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the - q& L; S# r+ I$ n# }2 V" m
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
4 ]) ^' T4 i; f>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct1 p) R0 }3 m. f- J9 X3 b# o* T
& Z9 o& l) e- y, _- ~" p' n
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research % ~/ N. z8 J/ z1 ~, u' J
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
4 O- D+ [) _, P) n3 j; @>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 8 F0 h8 w3 u4 @0 `* Z8 J% g
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, ; U  n4 `1 ~, L* u
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
8 h/ S/ w$ _: @' N) l+ [& t- P( d7 T' @4 l4 [6 d
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
0 z3 E0 Q0 w' Z>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
5 w) p# H) V) M9 ~' \3 h& ]>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
/ N  |9 \1 y6 R>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 ' U. x; A+ s" F: s: L: y# T, b
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a6 l  @' U6 a* L) ]" K
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
; [5 K- ?% u: R$ b  t. cthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if; y2 c; }2 D# Y; q% i$ W
the newfie would l ...
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" K) {9 g: K. U4 m5 s
2 z: t( \: Z2 W# {% v7 O好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:8 U4 l3 l" D8 Y0 \  W
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“," O$ r2 h# r7 j7 n
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
! r) m+ T# t  `5 n2 V# ]加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
8 ~# {+ i: O" r/ v. c; J2 O' G3 Q
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ( q. F9 O6 h; l3 a; H' ]

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3 w. A$ @/ b+ j) w! ?* ?! W- M1 ^! T- V9 Z" L) V  A* ]
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
4 K! E9 p5 N: C4 Y, [) n: Q* X: O“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,+ {2 W. t# W3 d' Z: h7 i
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
) c) A) Q/ k' \, X
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真聪明,偶像啊
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+ E, ]6 u2 h* _) J2 j: h- F全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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: ]  S1 k( |/ O) C
全盘接受一下。

0 v3 [- M0 V0 y- G8 Z5 x# E) S真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 + P! X% ?$ d7 F
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# m( ?/ c& W& c4 O8 G  e5 K  J! r
0 L0 h3 K$ W2 }& V! }别把我往坏路上领啊。

) Y% O/ C9 ~% ]& x你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表   \9 V( b& B* M. u
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 " L: c/ M; v0 o! a
3 |. Y1 y' X7 A' e6 v- f6 G
真博学,偶像啊。

: s* t& f6 w1 F* F- M+ |% O8 i. b大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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: G6 j( d% e9 d% A4 ^" m! s( @/ u大学教授哦,能不剥削?

6 `1 y. V  L9 }6 w: @7 {0 Q' |0 f& `她是大学教瘦?
' M6 y8 M3 d, c大学教胖还差不多 6 A5 j+ R' T0 m, n  Y6 I( Q
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 + L( w" D( Z: @
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
; j  o; T- r2 q8 e紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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