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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
- h* U- E# H0 A# ]5 {3 olong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb) V. w- v, J& q7 j! J
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if" y  g% L( l  Y5 f& E: H
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
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  d4 h  G0 y; Q; r The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
  n1 ~! s9 R3 t* `) d+ S9 \) q he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The6 |# I8 d' i$ q& o$ O) I
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
# i/ r8 K  ^* F' C4 o- lask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,7 u3 W& A" @5 d  p7 X/ C
you pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I' d; d0 G# P" ?) l* q& _$ k
will pay you $500. , _; Z' b9 V- ~# U; ~* W

" Q8 y) n$ {# d8 |; L3 e0 M) Y! M' ` This catches the newfie's attention and to keep( E2 l  P2 |8 h( K/ N
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. + G8 J" X- ?' H) j. B
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
+ a; M6 W# q& N; s, g( @. @the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 9 m( q# B0 u" [3 |. L/ ^6 v/ u) g0 x/ s7 w

9 Q+ s( @) _8 f# u0 LThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his. p/ O/ w; Y0 l, p/ T
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the9 @* P' v# b% {6 z
lawyer.
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* m) b* y6 L- ^  U% [5 h# B, t% yNow, it's the newfie's turn.
! J' U% o- @8 Y% P. b
: f6 {# k( z; lHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
/ x: H1 G0 m( B# ithree legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
$ H, U" R0 u2 H% b* z: B) A% B. j: ureferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
; W8 M( p0 ~0 A4 a) E: ]. ]the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
, X# Y7 @. l0 m7 F7 xof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
% ?1 `# o! |! v1 w& t& A2 s' {  ?/ n/ Mhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right4 p" }3 T3 F! q" x1 q& ^; E# I3 m
back to sleep. 8 U, I5 ^4 W6 S
0 @7 h' N" Z" |. X5 }
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
7 K$ Y( J- `% K1 o' u1 }# Hwakes the newfie up and asks,
/ i  U" X+ F  Z: Z
, z  U' o7 Y4 n$ P: K  ~) M( f'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and4 N/ n5 e+ _' N5 |' \2 j
comes down with four?'
! I8 c' }! q" B0 S
6 I* s5 g- C2 B: d2 OThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5" T' }( D) v* A( ~2 S9 {" B% k
and goes back to sleep.- v# L# b8 K2 x' |; f5 M$ ^

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!/ O% j; t/ m8 }4 G+ H
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two % `. }* y; {4 ^# k- w
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
7 e4 Q. [1 {1 z9 z8 j- P# A>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
0 F: A! y) G5 E2 J0 }* V>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ( F0 {- R$ l; Z
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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( v, `: a6 }% s9 A6 K4 [3 K: I>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 7 \5 ^; M8 N* p
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
9 X$ \8 c5 q1 E, H4 Q/ v: n1 Y7 `>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
1 K. s1 f, n% \$ e2 Q5 g>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 6 c+ q) q( B) f
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
; z' ^, r; T  Y' Y>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the ! a( t+ h8 @5 }* P: D
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 4 J! ?, G) G, g* S
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 4 L; Q( N( u& G7 U5 U6 h
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a' L4 ?& b* k3 O0 P
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb+ ^5 V' `  P) f7 @
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if+ t" U3 T0 O8 F
the newfie would l ...

% m! F( Q* y8 x1 }, v  Z# o+ J
- Z$ S' _5 X6 @2 f0 Q! n$ @' g. s8 ]6 k7 B+ T6 {
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
; L8 Y/ |/ c& b* I+ O“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
- g0 J6 L7 i9 n0 f) D0 ?8 d" a好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 3 q0 Q% J' R% e- l3 K: Y' C
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

! `! g! M6 [3 q1 R) k真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 # f. s) J" F* d& C
. e: I+ ?% d0 A: j: o$ O6 K

' N8 K& h& b, @' O" P& l; F+ }; t) X) x
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
: G, S1 V, K0 w! y$ @% ]! y“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
) k2 F! N5 n3 ]* J好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

- I7 [6 @: m6 q) Z% K! d  e" v/ L9 i9 M真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 + V6 I: j9 l2 ^3 C# S( s$ C9 w) r

: J$ `. j9 c6 x7 l0 e7 k7 y' K真聪明,偶像啊
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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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, K5 ~3 R# ^/ P& L5 F! M/ T) C- o$ B) x3 M9 f! h  D$ x3 A- O
全盘接受一下。
. l% W* e: \' p2 b
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 . d( N0 i* q, `4 ~% M

% L, r! K) E/ X4 ]. \! B/ n真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

6 \# p4 a. `2 A# v: N, ^" J7 \
: Q# P* s4 M2 O' Z$ f
+ C! k* j8 o! H+ k" m! u' A8 [别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 9 q: o1 N! ^  w. B
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ; ?7 \& L7 a% w% }
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
4 A! M( n; V& g' X, d3 e
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
  i& Z& \' S% y4 R
9 Y$ l+ G1 A! I5 V4 n真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ; i8 [2 `! E# a" g+ b1 y& l8 K8 g7 g

, j" s; z/ K3 [; \3 t( |4 [3 n# a大学教授哦,能不剥削?

8 _6 l( Q" ?. Z& x6 o9 b她是大学教瘦?4 x% }; V( O& A& V2 y
大学教胖还差不多 . P# M" _6 X' W8 @4 K
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 : O" r3 j! r# D/ s5 |5 c, u" ?
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

5 h1 X* G. e. k' L说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
, h, S; B, p% n# Q紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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& ^# \  i' \% `
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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