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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a/ e& M3 ^4 S- F# @& d7 D5 g0 g7 _
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
" N+ D1 O8 K, ~' t. Ethat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
+ l3 y/ V% G/ U' J: |7 D. Uthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
- B  q! ?0 s4 O- C8 l! O( x3 f  
5 F! w/ d. C% R& Y# K" R The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so9 I1 {, ^( Y  D1 U7 X5 t" j% @
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
0 E4 l+ u, k: C9 P9 q lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
' j" y) h( F8 g* r3 N4 Mask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,0 c" W# |" Z' X6 H+ q1 H
you pay me only $5.
3 R% }- D- t+ l4 ]) Q- {/ g" S + }; q( o6 R& s# X4 F5 d4 ~
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
$ s7 c5 A1 \2 V$ ~- s2 t% G will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep1 g: o7 T( n2 G& `
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. * c4 ]  w7 W) I: d
5 h8 _' e3 P2 A
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's* x9 t, l4 V; l! R
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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' ]/ Y  @, D2 _! ~The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his/ L( n% e: q$ @; q* C
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
2 v6 f* e  D; C2 [lawyer. , @) j& s* z. o: G

4 \6 Z8 \% k, ]$ @$ y3 I/ WNow, it's the newfie's turn.0 Y; E$ z9 p( H/ |- Z# x
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
' H$ C% E  p8 s5 rthree legs, and comes down with four?'
1 K) m: a. I" T8 v$ k: Y
+ |" I: {, w* p- S0 x! nThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
. d9 u/ M! D3 ~% {references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all) j7 H2 W2 s: \) x1 a2 D$ k! @9 [
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour* N+ R. i) f$ p9 h; B; T
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and# G& Y( p3 {: \' n2 M
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right8 n/ R, l5 }% d, d" {) L
back to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He* M7 ?6 w) \6 s1 m8 l
wakes the newfie up and asks, 7 L  m% E5 a: T; S# I) Y% ?
* E0 j2 B) O* L: k" L
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
7 _+ @' q' `, o1 Kcomes down with four?'
( F% b6 I' y5 @- y, V
! A7 U5 {6 u$ ~The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
: P8 v# f% [8 I" J. p% |' F; Oand goes back to sleep.
2 f2 C% v! _- _# ^9 K9 U! V$ K8 @. p* |9 m% O( u! H
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!- S  C% Z/ ~, v  T% \
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the% b( j- }2 X6 \+ U* y/ T

+ L8 ]1 D. K, a# l: q>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
4 {! ~$ v1 D6 r3 q9 h, V>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason & O0 Z! g  X; x: E! }) Y3 f
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
/ R% b' \) p) y>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
$ C" e( P: y; `# y' ?# y! I>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
5 o: `( F% E! E8 r
! l1 M% r2 h9 }>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research ! l6 x! U- {8 {: U2 ]# j0 M
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
" P- W$ }: P5 j& M* ]7 s2 a! C+ w>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 7 |  M2 i+ Q' Z* d& N! f9 U
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, $ l! u% f+ ~: V5 O. q# l# s6 t0 I
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
" z, b3 _- q$ b>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 4 X( \1 j5 X5 E9 o
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand * \4 v2 j1 X1 y, k5 p
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
& s7 Q; _& m; Q/ y& lA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a* B2 c# \; C) ]. ?# |( |/ m* w
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
$ s" E) z0 C1 ]6 t/ u, \+ _that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if! ^( w/ L3 I# U
the newfie would l ...

; V) b/ j! B, h9 c1 ^/ i( D% r% q* {

! j3 N, u0 ?0 z好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:  l* o+ U3 m) T7 c+ K- K
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,; G6 W3 w: L1 T$ a4 C, D& r
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
& O: s: \: ^# {% o加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

7 d6 C% ?( U5 X# R" @. y+ o真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 3 O. M; c/ y& L

* a; |4 h' r/ K" Y$ z. W$ N( z3 c, {- D) L& Q

% L3 N& L& M& D' O0 L, A. V) C好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:4 h$ {0 d5 j5 Q* A' ]- ~
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
9 c' X, k! `( o( f) r% f. k" _好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
" x% E' Q2 E6 B* W" s" O0 T: H
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
7 D) f/ \$ ]) \- N2 }" S4 R- u6 y% L
. E* d) d* Y9 j$ k真聪明,偶像啊
& t" [. i5 o$ z) V

2 B) l2 J0 U, x2 {7 u- U( W/ z+ S全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
- a$ `- p, c3 _% S  K
: a) q0 }. b  `! {, Q0 f6 ~( L! v! Y/ R  y, }
全盘接受一下。

$ B2 D# i4 o- O0 C: x/ }真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 ; [9 y; I; P( _# M: \$ b

4 c4 w! \/ A+ j真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
* q% F2 M6 m: `" a- G
% F! \+ h7 ~2 w/ H4 v

8 V* n4 T; k2 {' L* t别把我往坏路上领啊。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 $ Y6 _- r" A& R& C
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+ y% A5 R) [( v* R( Y5 B1 D
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别把我往坏路上领啊。

. D  r' [( M, W, U你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
8 n, p# {; R+ T加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
( N( Q  X* {  P
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ' O% q! a( J: j. `
) Q6 X' [1 c+ k" j
真博学,偶像啊。

# b) w4 V! X( ~/ @7 r+ ]# ~大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
; D9 V8 T$ @0 q: b5 o5 v! v: U! E: V  e; a; z, ~; a$ n6 h* c
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?, y0 p& l6 m( v, G' ]& n1 W
大学教胖还差不多
9 L8 G, t% Q" h  `& _她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
" b2 F+ N, @% {紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

/ C3 E+ w* F% f' ]/ {说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 0 J4 F' D2 ~: O% p& B
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

8 q6 c* D, [* @5 m% |' {& S4 l/ ]  Y& b" M
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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