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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a) U& T8 R. B0 g3 ^
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb1 f! G9 [% I2 @+ j- l1 a9 W& r5 C5 `
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if* s( T  p6 a/ Z" g
the newfie would like to play a fun game. : p  m; Z+ O) q, Z
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
3 }, Q9 ?! o: d, v3 A he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The* j! S: N$ D4 s7 Z
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
& `4 i5 [4 ?2 V2 I% f3 hask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
* B( `# @5 D* {0 ^% Eyou pay me only $5.
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# O9 r  h- }3 l You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I8 t( R* E. S; s; T$ Y5 \; W% w
will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep/ ^$ M# ?6 U( D! {6 [0 h
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. & L% L* V* S! d: ?

) @- m9 F. o: q- ~/ eThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
; N/ L8 z- |$ n0 Z0 dthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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/ X% p7 d# q3 N% K0 F' f# `The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
; L# i' g$ W9 |6 \7 t; tpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the- p% x4 c; X; [1 g3 n: r
lawyer.
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% C' M& h9 Y" c2 ~2 z+ ?Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with, n% t1 J- v! W; T6 t3 t) H: |6 E+ t
three legs, and comes down with four?'
# d3 f/ O8 i. X9 T& h
) r* r7 ~. X" z- l( F9 C' mThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all  R/ B, L9 U8 w$ Y" u
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
3 h; h0 E9 g& [) p  _the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
1 S7 W4 k' u) s/ e# l: vof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and" b  B0 w! C/ K  t+ _
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
$ k/ R0 d) f$ E: q' K7 jback to sleep. / h8 O; e9 n' Y; j

% |1 {: h# v! E7 uThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
+ i7 |" P- R1 }$ j0 d% _3 Gwakes the newfie up and asks, 9 s1 P1 ]) E( @0 S4 ]5 x

3 G, N# |% G# U3 F* _- N& L'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
8 ^7 ^7 ?+ Q( L$ X2 u$ rcomes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
- X9 q2 N4 ?1 {' F4 U. Aand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!& N$ L. h9 w- S, R

" O8 j, M/ r7 K6 `0 d. {Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the& B: w8 |* v4 E8 q

  j  z4 {0 ~( ~8 O: }>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
; P8 t( C" N. M. v# }8 i>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 6 Y+ r  T6 t. R; `4 f. v: l5 K# z" l
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the & s7 Q0 u  B) w  x" o. W
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ; O$ I8 S. u2 Q" V/ ]- C
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
( i1 ~6 g: e) W+ I' S* w
/ [9 B+ K7 g* s' J6 J4 g! D. }" O5 q1 z9 G>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research - q) Q# o. b1 G; w% C2 t3 S
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
3 G, L6 s8 w+ `) l" r/ H" P>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 8 s' R, f, k1 Z# `- g7 {/ c
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, % w, ]/ d+ Y5 J9 B
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three, |: p2 Y7 u; p4 g3 e+ h' P, E, J

- _3 }6 B2 z. C$ ?$ k>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 3 e" B; e8 M  Q; b% ]
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
0 g- z0 _3 w# U( R! r! J* z- h>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand ! z: v# z/ P3 j: v, r% C
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
6 [- X3 m) n7 j2 P. B9 X5 s) lA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a7 b" I0 [9 }/ K' `" ^6 c- D; [4 r* t
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
5 k; Z1 ]) g, d6 B' wthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
' X. \+ \, Z( E  L- x% Xthe newfie would l ...
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1 G9 o2 X4 A8 o
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
( J5 e! e' p* Z. g! n2 q* t  l“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
) r, ^7 s) z% M, t$ ^2 F9 z好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
1 C9 |. e) c6 v  C" Z  W) c加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
4 h' q2 z  I% b+ k. z8 q
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 7 w+ L+ @4 q: A8 V/ u
& l6 @6 _0 E' i, ~$ c
$ j1 p: `, H- ]  g1 L  |
8 h; G( v- e+ V. V4 ?  d% j# Q
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
; m+ g. }3 O  j/ z9 g# I“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,6 f! m  z( `% u' }  {
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

9 y5 s& C8 j" a! b真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
- o' H# e: V. k  j/ X9 l
8 E: J3 D, w. D9 p) x真聪明,偶像啊

7 U& D8 ]7 O: h9 f* C- s; ^* f1 a9 S. K, u3 {0 H  l3 O7 V+ p
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 # S# @: ^, `9 L& A( q* g4 B
* K9 h! h, S" `* i0 C1 s. T0 d  w& C
3 L+ b0 `" ^# C
全盘接受一下。

! w3 @* U9 e: }* j真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

! @% h) W3 s8 a6 E  ^, q  J, Q: f, _' T/ ~6 l3 C' W( N7 \
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
4 a; h1 {, t: D) J: M! _! g8 n: W/ v. ^' W6 \9 L0 @6 n% C5 l
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+ X) n7 z( H- u. }+ y1 d
别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 3 B9 a1 f# {+ m
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

- g( a1 R. h7 s1 a5 H9 J7 e- [多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 - M8 L: n  o% x* G  y

( _4 B* i) J: f# K, p, i) H真博学,偶像啊。

# D" l  o$ h  y1 z大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ' \. |$ d3 Q* D$ _+ O0 Z
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?
' N- r1 `: N* t1 q: r+ Z大学教胖还差不多
2 E! F! f) i/ i/ i  _) r7 y2 C她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
" O5 W+ v+ @# L! \紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

/ G) p+ T$ n) q! v  d说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 # b9 ~4 e* @+ W4 N4 y
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

6 Y, }! j" L! R7 J' m$ r1 K
; S( r6 p( q& G# p& W# P哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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