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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a3 f% K7 S8 Z; n
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
, `6 F+ v; D  \1 s7 Wthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if: P+ }: A' `$ U
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
. U- r" n* u. |2 N. k  ! k8 w% x7 L! f; Q) p/ Q  \) Z
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
: \7 Z  j* ~: W# B  ?) S# @) J he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The' Y" h  ]' f0 J$ H' r6 [1 A. e: b
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I- b. j! v6 W0 }$ M, x( T" L
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
0 G& E. A2 V+ K, ]+ G7 u3 dyou pay me only $5. 0 y; U/ L0 H# d5 s8 E

% Q4 q% ~6 I* O4 X3 D- K You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
/ O# [9 K. S$ ]# T6 f will pay you $500.
7 {  O7 Y2 F" M
2 E" u7 `/ N  s/ q4 e% j( T This catches the newfie's attention and to keep; g# C9 |$ I: S/ ^
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ' i5 L& L9 V& V! a" c
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's5 P, d) x4 J" \% Z: Y
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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1 r* K% L, _& z2 Y; P4 d# w& XThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
) A; Q  \4 Y9 Upocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
4 X3 u' x% ~- k+ k+ B5 \3 Elawyer.
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.* y' Q4 w9 a* O% p4 N7 ?6 ?

5 @' D4 K- F; t4 }' O& rHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
  \' m7 D" b2 y& h" B+ Wthree legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
2 H0 V1 R, R8 P# \* U6 p* Q  P) s0 [references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
/ q1 r% b0 N7 j6 |6 k0 \the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
- R; R5 K8 [& @5 l) U: jof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
. q  g+ e3 s9 {% [- h* ]  v: m8 Shands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
! E. _7 Y, A! x4 w+ y* hback to sleep.
  }* P. M9 ~' Y- ]+ W$ ~
. M$ j, r% b$ J9 l' p. R5 M: JThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He4 z0 A6 e, |4 ]7 S; {4 ~1 L  u* M
wakes the newfie up and asks, . Y5 C5 O, C+ c% L& f' H9 R  r4 L
& p: @( f2 M$ K, I& n
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
- `- B& b' u  y" j8 i; X- ]5 u8 Gcomes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5# V  O* h+ e# D6 D4 r+ o
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!: `. f2 ?& Y; ~2 W. A4 s

) M2 S3 N+ x7 Q: B/ ULawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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/ G  Y2 P% ^/ O0 U! o% ?, I- B! ?>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
* V+ o9 ?: @) G+ |! Y+ u. F>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 4 U: y5 J6 b" ~, y, p
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the . |' e& P$ }( o' y- V$ [
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ( P4 F( h7 g" X- W" ]
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct3 `4 |( j/ _& W. Y7 B9 z* h  v( H( w

3 |2 n8 z; i& ?7 w& Q$ w>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research , H2 I( I, l$ b$ M. _, c7 \4 q1 B6 h
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
, {$ Q: j4 ^7 r3 B& V! z& K>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more * ^# z2 H6 R5 v8 ^
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
! M- [3 A" u" r; w; H>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
* i" g: |8 ]9 @
& ?/ V" i) V) ~6 c>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
- s" H; [1 b2 k  K>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 6 ~& f# I( @( b$ ^  X
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 4 Y' k% D6 F8 X, x3 u- i
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
! {4 e! K7 G4 v# ]4 \3 u1 U* aA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
  d# K6 @+ O1 I+ ?long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
8 Q) |1 Y6 ~/ \  e' ~that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if% G- |& U" B" [; R/ F
the newfie would l ...
; e3 y6 Z% O2 l& [: V

9 k, Y0 S; }  z7 x, M5 K  {: o4 H$ z: n$ A) a% ^
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:* y$ |4 U& t$ I7 h8 _
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,2 A. p9 A1 p4 k5 ^
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
- m4 w; R1 q9 J$ Q. Z' @& h: K加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

8 ?: O$ e3 }1 T+ I真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
5 I* w4 m, p- m
; i- A% W) |9 b) d/ E0 S4 n% \. {3 L/ j9 V7 j

2 R/ l$ e8 Y% D. \2 n2 o好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
, N1 Q0 \- h, u1 w“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,3 g. S  s1 m2 u+ m' K5 s
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
' ]( ~- g, E+ O6 l3 \
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 2 _/ v9 X3 j8 r( E
5 |) Y2 F0 ~! w7 I+ ]
真聪明,偶像啊

( Y/ f6 s, j: N3 O$ X
  q2 }+ \( I) X: N  d( s全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 + o$ {7 {% ~, J2 {1 P

! Q  j* h3 N4 K2 M$ x5 C
. ]( m; @5 R% X) l- D* E3 \$ K全盘接受一下。
8 t5 N) E4 S  Q; ]4 P
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 0 ?" }/ h7 \& F4 f& @

! c" R* c. F( C+ k' ~2 @- m7 j$ \真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
6 w9 c- L* G9 c/ N, r; P6 i( G7 r, f6 L
, C( t( K; R5 W2 O. L
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 3 H3 s' b# _- E* |
" ?1 l- S4 Q7 F- j7 l7 }/ L. c" L
  X3 ~& j7 P4 v! Y

( D9 l. c1 ^/ g* ~8 `! |别把我往坏路上领啊。

7 b/ I3 x8 d/ G  p+ n: m1 l% V你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
2 G) E& P, h, e加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

; A* i% d6 S8 S  Z2 W* e多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
% {' b; p% |7 H) ?3 M
0 f& X* f% |' Y$ N9 g4 {& c  A真博学,偶像啊。

$ x( ?; Y' B# I. }. d0 Z, E, L大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 5 Q+ _$ D* i5 v( X+ \
6 n7 F- A3 C6 v7 {3 F; i1 D
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
( x! p! y1 h1 j; a0 t8 ^6 |/ k5 z2 l
她是大学教瘦?
7 T) h( ?% ]: q  g8 {% z+ r) z大学教胖还差不多
) s# s# i. j! m$ Z1 z她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 % h3 v: o* ?/ O
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
# K" \) [' U( d: O4 ~5 g5 n2 N
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 9 ~3 s4 I% i3 d1 v, a$ q
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
8 h/ F% U* f% i9 R; K( q

* |) V( l4 m" z' @/ s! H哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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