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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
9 v: J3 a5 s% j5 g0 F0 p1 ^long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
8 {5 K+ `0 `9 ?. o  e( mthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if3 q& a- T3 G7 I. R; w7 N! m, b
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
  u$ `' n3 D# Q9 S( G* T7 B  
; T) Z& l  M: l. w) w7 U0 t The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
  y/ u1 m5 F4 k0 Q! H* \8 X he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The8 ]9 E6 P  R  U6 q2 u9 Z
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
# V, J7 E# G( O0 J3 E) M! a* }ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,: T7 A( ]: N6 V) j9 l; P0 S
you pay me only $5.
4 D* s% d$ c- Z" v7 l
. u$ b/ I( b% Z7 ^. d- d You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
0 N! V1 V/ F3 r! [: m will pay you $500. # f0 ^3 d0 Z1 ]4 X0 ~  C- ?/ P5 v5 ~
6 f. Y5 p' W* R" _$ R* Z
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
3 _  ~2 O2 `6 n- o/ s6 I; e( w! c; fthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 1 }0 L$ e! l9 I8 j
% M, _. R5 ^& _$ I, \" U
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
7 o/ V: }0 ~* B  i3 k) g7 {the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
1 I) n) f7 O, Z5 j' z7 ~! }* O: R
& _+ h. W' ]6 Y2 f" w8 TThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
' V  ]9 f( r+ X5 u! ipocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
. W  I  B+ b( Zlawyer.
* Z. F1 j9 G, }1 {1 @' B" v+ c7 P/ {8 e' Y$ R  v
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
0 h3 X* s3 i8 A% h: B1 d
+ m! i0 H  O" m, L# [He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with% t, d% K# h7 w* ]$ _
three legs, and comes down with four?' 7 ~( L' E1 b, J: B: g
3 [* Q: \) A1 L7 V  |
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
6 N- X4 w- ~/ i5 K8 `references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
" m$ c+ B8 z% i2 y) ~the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
/ m" A- w8 ?: N4 Oof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and! V: Z! V7 c( Q7 [" L
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right! @: N8 g6 o6 v+ g  m5 U6 ?
back to sleep.
" [6 Q/ Q+ _; d$ f7 R  W+ Q1 k9 H/ q
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
- ?+ w, C% p! K- {, N  Pwakes the newfie up and asks, 6 g, n8 ^" B5 {( r: E- ]- Y
+ e8 I& l- k9 j5 e
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
5 K% f" E6 _5 ?comes down with four?' 0 k$ ~; T- _' K# W

8 _; B( l8 X$ v% d) V7 n, cThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5) L% Q. c3 j% r' t- l1 @+ @) j
and goes back to sleep.
7 H+ |2 I; z  \+ t, ^8 p. H& p! [! C: d  I# U7 N, d3 M& S
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!; _) z) t* c* _( E! v
% d, \$ a! j3 e* p7 a
Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the8 y+ |+ `4 [  B3 a

5 Y6 a( e' t: H$ h) h4 P>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 2 a4 ?) ^4 ~& t% ?: B6 m9 w
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason * k# c" V& O2 y
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
- p, G6 R* r) {6 _! b) ?6 D+ A( q>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 6 r9 Q* V! {9 N7 z/ U+ Y6 q3 e5 x" s
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
' ]8 u9 |; Q1 L! r& i" c
, R+ u6 l: U/ d# u4 G>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
4 I' s7 w. h4 E$ Y5 K: j>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
$ T8 N8 |/ W3 I" ?6 d+ {! I$ Z6 G>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
) W3 I& K% F8 V' F>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, % O6 Y4 t% y, W, E# I  w: P$ |
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
! W8 L; L/ b, [/ L& r  b# R
# q, s. L5 c+ X1 n7 Q' S/ R* v>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's % C. `$ n# j1 ^+ t: X' p
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the / s  i# L/ {7 v: }
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
$ b1 ]9 S% P7 N>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
2 ~2 o( z9 X8 j( V3 L* |A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a) \  L8 G2 `5 v4 k+ T
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
* ], `+ `9 `0 \* Z% v  @that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
% m( i- G; ^7 Q$ kthe newfie would l ...

5 Q  v0 w( D# x0 s9 E% ?: A) e7 p9 x3 d1 n& J7 k
- S* H* q! \* {) c6 K% S
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
0 O" l0 R/ H+ a1 k7 w! U- _2 ^“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
4 ^- O5 _5 s' R; Y  m8 D3 g) Z3 T$ R好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
* z% ]3 ~/ i# y6 i' O0 _加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
6 ~" T1 t+ A" f, F( \
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 6 C" L& L% G# d! q) c
# E: p$ z; E: x8 g0 |0 `
. J8 Y: I4 p& J4 e

! ^" ^: I/ J- c: i好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:# G, F0 m- }" I! ^, X
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“," I1 `2 o/ x* [
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

3 V$ X2 G9 m2 U, x% n9 @8 I真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
% J1 c7 y) m. _+ d6 n9 d, _# u! R+ k- ?# F( D
真聪明,偶像啊

8 d4 Z  u6 U) s+ Z
; s( D0 l, J$ h6 e全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
' V5 n4 n" T# y& @5 M) n8 N8 k) g$ f/ R: X1 m5 g* f
* l) z+ C2 @+ j
全盘接受一下。

) d: O  \0 l; a+ ]; b5 e真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
: e: i9 \6 B5 k- o+ p
( r  m" X* ]5 a- `( y: d/ Z: H: k真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
0 I! _) Q* s/ r- T
( \- q' v2 o6 ~! p0 |. ~/ A

% C+ B8 l* U/ x* P别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
3 B( v9 b: t7 G% Y  ~9 s! i% r3 l& d+ A  w; ]' |( P

* |: z3 L2 r) X& I
2 F  Z  G) a) o0 S2 ?% j8 |) S1 g别把我往坏路上领啊。
" {$ e0 d- {6 b) E& H
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ' I9 Q& h( k2 q
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

; @. {& }" P: |' w! G; y多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 " v' R' W" T! x  j8 n

7 @- X" K. d& T" q真博学,偶像啊。

& Y! c* j* ~, j% C2 R8 v大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ; |: }3 m) ]: D! M

# k3 n( N6 r$ Z( p大学教授哦,能不剥削?

3 N) Q& D+ `2 J* ?7 `% r) _/ w她是大学教瘦?
( |! |" A$ W/ c, }大学教胖还差不多
( U( P. w: h) Y, Q9 E% G她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ' v8 U0 h, z. \* s+ _" J
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

1 g# @& p) u# i  I$ z说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
) D: f1 E/ m5 i; E9 {: N2 ^紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

, e- v4 X# v( _9 g7 y( P/ ^* Y& T5 t
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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