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Blonde Car Accident
: E" r1 W. ~6 hOne day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.2 I9 B H: Y: s+ a' r q" ~7 g
. S, o9 i8 d* X0 g, w% XThe truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.0 B- v2 X' Y5 l# I6 F3 G8 F
' c" o2 v/ ] p/ d, {* m7 P' ~* _He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.. Q) J/ a& s% m; {- S% R3 V
8 r9 N& y. [- b% N2 k5 ~5 b7 }Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
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; k: @) u% q" h' n( ~5 L) D. _The blonde started laughing., b/ O6 Y) T0 D3 m. T# k" f
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This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
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This time the blonde laughed even harder.. k" i1 L& c' N( e' P6 ]- q: m
) D9 ^* C* n0 T( q% XLivid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car., `$ w/ I* g! k. [* h; k, S
( R. J3 V5 H+ v4 dThe blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.
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The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"4 v( \9 Y( M; q8 O$ i
0 T- y- m$ M8 HRowing Your Boat/ `1 Q2 g. m0 K
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.: k8 X' h1 r5 J8 w4 b9 b
: g5 K/ q" @5 J* l$ V) {: O- DThe driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
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To this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her.": R3 E8 P$ k. r, e
6 r$ S+ C$ C9 Z3 v( XI Want to Buy That' F- u8 \3 {$ `" T1 D$ L1 z( J% l
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.9 _) m% p: \& y$ s7 X+ v% g
- U( N& V7 q7 N+ K0 i* f+ i- w( VThe clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.
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4 P8 h& K2 j( B/ w6 ?The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
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' J7 ^- ]: J( @4 h* |- ~Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.
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- f& d3 ~/ F6 M) xSure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.7 ]9 U* c( z1 W# T/ g" v
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To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.
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The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
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The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"
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Are You Really Sure?# i& d3 q' F1 t6 w8 x: B
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"3 L& @& D' O1 t7 N* e
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In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."9 c- |# t2 u! [4 ]
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Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
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0 U8 V6 ]6 Q9 E! CThe blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
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Blonde Sky Divers
c1 T9 D6 y B X* B& MA blonde and a brunette are skydiving.2 |% l e3 H0 Z$ V
( _& u) r4 q/ \& Z! z* `+ }& ^The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.5 C9 V3 [% x4 }, w9 ^: B
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She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.
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The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
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$ l( g/ p, K; _" b[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
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