 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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: \. ]. Y9 ~" ` F, q" z0 ITake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks." b! K8 Z6 N0 l# f6 X- o6 A
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. . [+ ~, t/ Z8 F3 r& t8 X9 B6 @$ a
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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4 w2 {9 j* h% p `7 O; KLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
' D' V3 ~* j3 w2 omake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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1 X! y% o/ a( i% ~8 V7 RGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. q! N; b( z2 a2 @
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.& U* T/ p j- Z
! w! `& ~" b, X- O$ m/ [# CCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..; v& c; c9 |, S6 ^# r% m
; s, m& G0 l, G0 _5 j; Y' K+ IWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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/ N0 ~) p3 {3 ERinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.0 S: G3 ^+ Z4 Q; ~* F3 ?
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Turn off shower.5 O8 N! q' Z: q& Q/ m; I$ O9 V' b
4 u4 f6 Z/ {0 d$ K1 y8 Z; ^" hSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.) y4 ?- b4 f8 c3 s' P1 c
) V) F A9 {5 x9 b- a! T* T8 w& dSpray mold spots with Tilex. # V9 ^: Q6 k$ @! a5 B" |
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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! J3 |) h" U% [$ |4 ~& n% V. ^Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 1 P6 q H1 K6 \; ?
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 1 M# n0 f8 P& c+ j
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: % ^2 U, M$ ^$ g+ h
8 t5 Z0 q/ N& S4 {% j; ]# KTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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: U& k( L+ b- sWalk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. ( ]8 s! o2 x s
9 @6 x0 W3 F+ M3 n PLook at your manly physique in the mirror. : Z$ Z, s! k* O
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. & C5 C( q. _1 w' P/ D0 s& d9 D6 E0 s
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. % \) G" P- I% \9 ^
& m! K4 _ B2 ^1 @& @ m- Q7 Y' OBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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, W5 i( Y6 Z' c, C( t) l6 hFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. ! P ]* T* z+ b. }
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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) _" k, y6 J. J `6 }% m& CPartially dry off.9 u/ }4 Q E: b6 u& @! v9 B$ r" G
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. ) T1 D1 d& \' B( Y+ _5 }) C- w
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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; n( c2 O l1 a" a8 l; rLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. , c3 T. J8 N& V, K" n1 X u
; s8 P0 ]" n0 K; X4 b. l8 }Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
