 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : * S6 O% i4 _: Q! v- [2 d3 v
! l/ N; k3 k! }0 l' }& x% D
K3 Z) v: [3 p5 l2 W7 Z$ n& ?--------------------------------------------------------------------------------2 z$ X' [1 x# n! u
: k1 y4 u* `* y h1 y# N5 ^0 D' R
+ Z4 s, N9 ?) Q) d
4 @8 k+ y" y$ d3 l8 M- g
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
! e6 c+ r2 w- h* v5 g+ P
% t/ S) {( {: {Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. ; d: M) V- s! Q; H# V
9 r4 U' L' U4 Y* l8 M7 H: b3 J7 H
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.3 X A4 S+ R9 u! \: i
9 ?, _, o' p% s: ^/ QLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
5 t, }0 n8 q8 R. s( ]make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.) U" V; L6 n7 m5 N( q$ T# f
2 Y7 A) ~. E* @, S9 Q! }) a. OGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. ) n* u. k1 a( \' C
6 x5 H& ?( z+ A8 D$ O8 ]" \3 N# B6 jWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
+ P) G, J- [- m# r4 `8 p, H! a) d6 V% |/ U6 k j$ S+ E
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.# q+ `( H' C9 t3 I, [3 E
0 q* m" O# x3 }1 I1 WCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
; k E* F% e/ p( H
7 `* Z: f/ y$ {# t* oWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. , U% S, G/ F. @& J: b5 F- c
) ]0 X# n" P# x) w. R" J* \5 Q5 K
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
% t% K0 D2 _& l" t# s6 o# l" T
) W! O' I! ^& V6 \+ ERinse conditioner off hair.
% a- g. @' |& _, Z M* b0 r& g& u8 Q' Q" `0 _
Shave armpits and legs.
) l$ Y. i+ i# @: ]
: j ]8 X& L3 v) \2 K/ i" X$ `0 qTurn off shower.
# V7 v: y( P% U& I6 A, Y' e+ o6 K2 v3 m& ` W
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.5 q/ Q. |5 v, G( ?6 r/ q7 Z% O D
% J' V; S; [3 z2 o1 f- g7 ZSpray mold spots with Tilex.
+ Y, O0 \! e9 a& Y
! i" G* Y4 t( e nGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. ! z. G9 q' }0 Y: p$ ?. Z# I" G$ n
2 `' V4 }5 t+ A- [% Z) b
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
9 g; x2 ~. n" B# D- U8 `
( |4 E2 v' i# w4 t( q. kReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
+ D0 e# H/ Z5 m7 `5 L, U- s! e; W. B5 ]
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. + U3 n, ?$ G" q; Z$ S: w
" R" O5 z B" a4 Y) `) u% ]/ H; J
/ n* ^# k- L4 ?1 }$ \& x
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
/ K9 s; n) F- R# z! L6 _0 a$ n( M) J; B1 d4 W* u$ e1 y
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. - n! ]8 b: e2 b2 h
( u# R$ K. A+ B8 JWalk naked to the bathroom.
3 D) S4 F7 R: e) G/ {9 o8 Y0 F3 `( k; R6 n
If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. , X W6 v' K0 L
" y/ w, ^" W7 T2 v, L( h' Y2 c
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
3 Q; O, Z. L3 F. H
# p2 [& o9 Y! nAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. " S, |' X* U( H2 [+ A
+ K9 M& D6 K$ p! [# `
Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 6 z8 H2 {, C" l
2 d0 Q: H3 S- w4 ]/ \6 ^Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. ) _9 h8 I8 c; A& l& s+ p
$ R3 v6 ?- s0 t# f+ h; {0 ~Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
: L) n. Q' k/ I+ t7 a" A! K p
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
! l5 \# D& G1 ~6 K. @9 a
# s1 h7 E2 v3 y& }& G% U0 NWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. ; W3 M1 {( R; s+ ~, }, c7 b( L
/ c7 V+ _2 a6 G4 j8 l+ B" \Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
7 b7 s9 ~5 B% t& n) g: n# N
! t d" [+ h( ^% B* ~% a. APee. b: r* J& o3 ?( K
0 c( B" q- V2 x' i! HRinse off and get out of shower.
2 Z0 J. m% n9 l: o: [* S. C% H2 Z3 x, ]
Partially dry off.& J+ X( o5 S g* }% C: C
* p5 m# K- d' y" a, BFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
8 O) S- L5 L) s: e: w7 l$ O y5 `* e6 @( X
Admire wiener size in mirror again.
$ j3 z9 J, L# `; J; r
3 ?& k$ [9 k4 C5 D! o, M% D QLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
/ |, _; c6 W* |- ~# r8 b+ S+ j
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
& U( P) { m3 E! A7 |) f% _+ }0 e8 F6 l' O' ]: c
Throw wet towel on bed. ]: x0 g5 ~1 B- i
* v3 w6 c3 J, X5 ~) @If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
