 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : * S6 O% i4 _: Q! v- [2 d3 v
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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% t/ S) {( {: {Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. ; d: M) V- s! Q; H# V
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.3 X A4 S+ R9 u! \: i
9 ?, _, o' p% s: ^/ QLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
5 t, }0 n8 q8 R. s( ]make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.) U" V; L6 n7 m5 N( q$ T# f
2 Y7 A) ~. E* @, S9 Q! }) a. OGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. ) n* u. k1 a( \' C
6 x5 H& ?( z+ A8 D$ O8 ]" \3 N# B6 jWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.# q+ `( H' C9 t3 I, [3 E
0 q* m" O# x3 }1 I1 WCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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7 `* Z: f/ y$ {# t* oWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. , U% S, G/ F. @& J: b5 F- c
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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) W! O' I! ^& V6 \+ ERinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.
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: j ]8 X& L3 v) \2 K/ i" X$ `0 qTurn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.5 q/ Q. |5 v, G( ?6 r/ q7 Z% O D
% J' V; S; [3 z2 o1 f- g7 ZSpray mold spots with Tilex.
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! i" G* Y4 t( e nGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. ! z. G9 q' }0 Y: p$ ?. Z# I" G$ n
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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( |4 E2 v' i# w4 t( q. kReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. + U3 n, ?$ G" q; Z$ S: w
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. - n! ]8 b: e2 b2 h
( u# R$ K. A+ B8 JWalk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. , X W6 v' K0 L
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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# p2 [& o9 Y! nAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. " S, |' X* U( H2 [+ A
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 6 z8 H2 {, C" l
2 d0 Q: H3 S- w4 ]/ \6 ^Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. ) _9 h8 I8 c; A& l& s+ p
$ R3 v6 ?- s0 t# f+ h; {0 ~Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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# s1 h7 E2 v3 y& }& G% U0 NWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. ; W3 M1 {( R; s+ ~, }, c7 b( L
/ c7 V+ _2 a6 G4 j8 l+ B" \Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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0 c( B" q- V2 x' i! HRinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.& J+ X( o5 S g* }% C: C
* p5 m# K- d' y" a, BFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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3 ?& k$ [9 k4 C5 D! o, M% D QLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed. ]: x0 g5 ~1 B- i
* v3 w6 c3 J, X5 ~) @If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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