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9 B) m3 b- h# H2 H0 J0 I+ H$ p; lWhy did God make mothers?1 v! u+ ?& j, g& E7 K$ g3 {+ u
7 F+ {6 \3 m- X& S/ k1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
- V! K, e; ?9 Y& O2. Mostly to clean the house.
|( I9 h" X0 k9 \5 Q3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. / ^, M9 Z' E. t% [) p' t
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How did God make mothers? 8 r6 n8 {. I E1 S. f
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
' y F% z# \2 U* Q4 O" ^/ e2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
, o$ B- c( s5 Z6 `6 w8 Z3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. # G, k* D) G, [5 A3 c- A; J
2 [4 s8 }5 B0 n* T `2 O1 rWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? 2 O9 ?+ H \8 `* f+ `
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
3 h% _" H) c$ h# b" o) O$ P" m2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. ; q5 U9 B# g! _& ?# C- a
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? $ i; u2 M2 Z) i* t# D) I: A" m
1. We're related.
' @# w1 h# c" ?/ J1 k* K1 n2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. & a( Z' d. f2 U, L% d% J$ v
: ]# X5 W7 Z0 W0 KWhat kind of little girl was your mom?
8 }& U5 f5 D. {" n# x; h1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
, E( S' \& r0 b1 O }2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. ) c1 v. ~7 C8 l" g
3. They say she used to be nice. 7 T% P, n% B2 p4 J$ M y
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
( f- ?8 C( h: u$ D; x5 w1. His last name., z/ i$ @3 i' J( J$ N3 g
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
; k h4 \( T; x! }3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? 9 H) \8 @) t" o3 x( [- F3 F# N7 k6 I5 r
" i9 ]" N4 Q. u0 uWhy did your mom marry your dad?
; P- N$ r: v: d4 J$ E8 {: u1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. 2 a0 b0 l" O3 m0 p- `* N6 P% a
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
& n8 c- b6 r2 y% ?; ~3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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Who's the boss at your house? . `8 Y5 S% k. _% E) i3 ~- |
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
3 Z* q# x V B6 Y- j. h$ t- h6 V9 `2 c; @2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
, {& ~+ Z+ }, `; d3 u/ R# L- J3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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What's the difference between moms & dads? 5 W2 R5 _9 P% W5 ~. e2 }8 S/ s
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
( {; N, Q7 M; U! A" ]2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.3 Y) w1 u7 @0 o/ m$ R' m
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. % D7 L( O9 S3 t! R; r# A9 b
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. " u$ g7 G8 O' n; Y" O
' i! [( R9 R) J* j# J- f+ PWhat does your mom do in her spare time? + f. b# r" @ v3 N7 H7 Y
1. Mothers don't do spare time.: g9 `) x/ ] ~+ ]/ a: @
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. : k9 ] t3 E( A& U8 a8 ?
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What would it take to make your mom perfect?
( E5 q5 r* H9 j C1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.1 v) @2 D7 Q+ ~% N2 Z
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. # g8 u G) Q. R$ K
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? 5 l- R" k9 t8 N
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. " R; `* ?. r" k
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.9 g$ x: G8 |; U' p( ]0 S
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. # A# M1 [( z1 E% p4 V$ b/ i7 x" y* v
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