 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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Why did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2 S. J. C9 A& |6 f0 g2. Mostly to clean the house. ! n; a- h0 l& s7 Q$ C
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. 6 j1 B( a Y' A5 X) o
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How did God make mothers? # e# R! D) h% m1 c- s6 {$ l# ~
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.; ?: F4 `$ U6 O
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. Y( f) C. f! S U% V g; a$ I ~
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. G' m0 t% v+ W2 q; w
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What ingredients are mothers made of ? $ U E; J9 c& i
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
, U' A2 l+ Y: a+ J, O5 S+ F f# R2 I2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
* }" u* ]. B( N/ y- J1. We're related.
, s5 g. s3 l2 e1 Z& w2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. . m: p. G: S1 e/ g
1 Y4 x. L: S6 _3 I1 C* l' Q0 @What kind of little girl was your mom? * s- Y/ S7 Q; L, P3 l
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
- |& a4 ]' u( D& M1 E2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
7 N$ `0 ~5 c) B' d* M7 ^3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? 0 l0 ]( [6 x+ Q8 O$ v* q+ C) ]
1. His last name.
( k1 q' z: @5 c2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
% Q* k4 S9 N5 d3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? - J a; p8 U" I7 d& `
6 b% F! V2 W9 h' AWhy did your mom marry your dad? ; r: I9 c: Y2 f' c" E! ~. T
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
0 T8 I, ^4 q9 t: z: V m8 T2. She got too old to do anything else with him. ( u" `# d- u- ~" o
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. ' ]+ s6 ]/ Z. g/ D* M+ R
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Who's the boss at your house?
/ \' Q. P2 K% e _1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
4 s! `6 v0 \, ]- ]: D! K. V& \: X2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
$ K! [3 n( P$ h- J; a/ d3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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What's the difference between moms & dads? : f& Y9 ?, J- l
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
! l5 ?- u. P2 ~# J/ E4 r9 d; T; b2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
4 w& ?4 W# T( m- u3 `' m2 ?3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
$ u& n4 @& r0 y' M4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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: V1 y' D. t/ }What does your mom do in her spare time?
5 k$ r* ?5 `5 t0 F% d1. Mothers don't do spare time.2 L7 S' }! k3 Y- Q
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. 0 d( R- Z/ k, M4 L( z. h
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What would it take to make your mom perfect?
0 Y2 S( @' C. `) |( A1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
# Q) m* m# z& w7 q5 R$ R- S2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? # M# X; A: L" j" `" c' r4 R
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 7 C0 }/ z% Z2 w
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.: A" t" c9 e/ r# C/ u) N, c* w- N
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. / d9 h: @/ n8 v) m8 e
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