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! H3 K6 S, r7 _7 _% U* t" L( sWhy did God make mothers?5 d! E p4 g- g' `: z! b8 T6 M
- h# t: |4 L+ a8 G: z+ r) q1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.5 v6 [5 S. v1 C8 d- J) v
2. Mostly to clean the house.
* }. r9 Z8 }# j' F- O& k$ b4 n) {3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. ! i; m7 n; u$ r) r
. M& u: k8 r; BHow did God make mothers?
) P5 V4 e3 |' A; X: d! X+ S1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.# X/ G. e: u5 n
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
( R! B- M% X/ v! q% T6 d/ S; k3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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What ingredients are mothers made of ?
+ l, {( G+ p) D" v% y# e1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
) ]' P' T; | G8 ~7 B6 C2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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0 n+ o2 k+ H6 v' Y3 Q8 q! yWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
/ c* N$ `( _6 C7 N# F1. We're related.
1 k2 z( S1 t. n0 N+ U* S2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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What kind of little girl was your mom?
$ ]* W- O% \8 W6 y' f; k0 g1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. + G" X$ c4 d8 I6 ?+ j
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. # F9 g# l. X' D; U+ z
3. They say she used to be nice. / v$ V2 C3 ], Q+ A) w" R7 l. c) G
0 P; a9 Y* D( T2 B. I6 S8 g6 cWhat did mom need to know about dad before she married him? " n; J+ ~7 `) L7 R Z+ I+ ]
1. His last name.
2 h, H" M, ?% s/ b1 G' }4 Y8 N2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
0 k# w, A- h; X3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? 4 Q( v$ `% W; A2 E
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Why did your mom marry your dad?
# A- p& R# R# U. v: O1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. 2 f: n- L# E) }" \
2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 7 a! d& t7 Q8 K& S5 u" G; {! t9 q
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. ' g* f; N' c9 G) k n5 _
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Who's the boss at your house?
* o0 L; u# l& e0 ]) j( b1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. 1 H' r' A" F9 E a$ x' \6 J" ^* N$ G* ^3 W
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.; S7 l! k* d0 F8 a
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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What's the difference between moms & dads?
2 P6 V5 R* o! O6 G6 s# i1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. - q( A% p0 f- d' o) M
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them. }, b4 ~9 n& i9 J& m; C
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
3 W: X5 ?4 ^* Y4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. 5 G( i4 U0 V) _
4 r+ Q0 ?, ^, Z6 z1 [What does your mom do in her spare time? # A4 l" p- `/ d. B4 H
1. Mothers don't do spare time.0 F1 E0 w! E& W4 k( d6 }; @
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. & n: j3 P( _! c
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? - C3 F4 e9 {) I$ q3 j
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.6 I. K" ~5 Q- {0 O
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. $ l O4 T0 |) e& k: X4 l( `& x
, [) C# W8 D+ S; }# _, L2 p/ XIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? $ g; w0 k* l( B8 m
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 4 O( L! X4 _( ]6 ]% i0 p
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
! c; t5 G: s [0 L* z2 o* ^3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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