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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
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$ L+ x! k" `3 _* s' ]1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
3 d! B' j' ?" R2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown. % s4 f- q! \- T. I( x! h
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
+ P' z5 u/ d' l' ~4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. ' P6 A9 G! q2 A! M
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA x2 E4 S. ~" U; ]# F1 C- q# T+ p
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1. Big rock between you and B.C. ! @) t; t8 f4 z
2. Ottawa who?8 H$ I2 s; k) C6 K! ^2 C
3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. . v0 t& K9 t3 i. A
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
}% A4 A+ Q, S$ Z5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
: Z) y, b3 O# Z) R! k& }6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. & v w5 q; e, b7 c8 I4 r: z$ h
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0 J5 [4 ~, X2 V+ G7 U B$ n* ITOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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3 n, A3 R9 H7 f. ~, x3 L1. You never run out of wheat. $ F2 L$ F$ \& b Z
2. Your province is really easy to draw. 0 \9 E) s4 d3 z8 m' e
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. : b/ ]- V v8 ^7 S- ?" J
4. People will assume you live on a farm. : m2 J" n" T* ~" @+ m
6 L% ~; O' c7 e1 k( |TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA 7 u* P; p5 Y# p# D+ S4 N9 B6 r
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
% @' Z# B6 Q0 o1 D& N. U2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
: R Y- ]! D' ?8 I& F! o3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. 7 a5 U' v4 H+ x( Z
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. 1 j3 `; O+ P6 A' a$ p- a& l
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by. . ^" l& o9 ~# ^( j8 ?" R7 E3 K6 _) u
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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1. You live in the centre of the universe.
y) B( E! B+ h" p2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. ; F- x/ }; a0 S
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
# T5 Z+ [0 r9 v+ C# Q4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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4 M/ X) p" X I6 n2 V8 ]TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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1. Racism is socially acceptable . {, y$ s7 x F! ]* x8 R
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. " W& P: J2 W u% s
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. " h# E! T {3 I0 ]! o
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *8 @+ k* q0 p' j+ v+ i9 X
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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9 l% K- ?3 t( i8 ~- @+ kTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. : o, v6 M9 I# i Y" ?: |
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
6 Z* S6 b) ^7 t5 H& q# J% J3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
* D, w+ ^2 \$ f# B7 R4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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0 Q5 |9 R( d7 i5 \& rTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA 1 r$ Q2 m+ [; S7 N J$ E$ \
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% F" V6 P& @$ o( t4 U8 B; h: R1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can. ; X, |, w' F+ g3 `" N" V
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
1 L/ t: U$ _/ H P, e2 E. x! O3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. - T+ D0 y& e+ P5 e& Z- p
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
3 D8 w* ]5 {# c7 B; V2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. " c/ f; Y- w8 Y! J7 Z9 d# j5 }
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
' W% D" T+ \0 }: N: R4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
/ L! d$ p) `4 P* E# ~) j- `, y5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. , F7 s) m/ i1 }2 W o1 |6 b* S+ x
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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! J4 U* _* l8 O5 TTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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' q6 j8 j. F0 y& M2 h; {& z1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
: @6 c5 ]1 {: Q4 d& I# D3 k2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. 2 g" b7 ]* }9 \) I3 W4 E
3. The workday is about two hours long. 1 c( x b a' p3 o2 p) w/ S2 `
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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