 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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本帖最后由 三思 于 2011-4-16 09:04 编辑
$ J7 J8 [4 [ ?% M2 d幼儿园还要再给他像你说的这样办一遍的,和家长弄是不矛盾的,美好记忆完全可以更多一点,没有必要限制,只要精力和财力允许,完全可以办生日会,生日会怎么算也算不着不好的风气
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娃是很知道party的special的, .../ ~4 P* m( m0 ?
sweetlele 发表于 2011-4-15 22:43 
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我认为大型生日会是不良风气,因为一部分有精力财力的家庭给没有精力财力的家庭造成了压力,父母因为担心孩子因此受到压力,而不得不举办同样形式的生日会。而这种形式并没有赋予生日会特别的意义。比如乐乐你设定的20元礼物符合标准,一个月9个生日,180元礼品预算,承受不起的家庭,是不是就没有能力让自己孩子参加朋友的生日会这样的社交活动?
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我家的财力精力大概不能和乐乐家比,但是我觉得给小孩子的生日大肆刷卡不是一件值得提倡的事情,有悖我的教育观念。* L3 f8 @( `$ g' f
/ O' H& B6 ^' }2 a. T另外,我搜了一下,中外对小孩子生日会都有反对声音。这个网站特别好,http://birthdayswithoutpressure.org/专门讲生日会的,为什么当前的生日会是不良风气,有比我更多更好的解释和说明。其中也提到了乐乐你说的学校办一遍家长办一遍的问题,提到了孩子要赶很多生日会的问题。
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对孩子的不良影响也有非常详细的列举* e j, e. A" m- [; \
. M# W0 D2 W; Y2 m ?' N$ sFor Kids: 3 l: B, ]' }, q' b l6 x# B( ?
Not all children face each of these consequences, but enough children experience them to give us worry. * F$ H9 f) r$ d: {: B
They get stressed out from parties that are too large and too orchestrated.
% `/ S6 V3 a- f2 z They are overindulged by too many presents.
# J. b2 J7 N+ r6 W* G$ u% |3 h, WThey feel entitled to what they want, not just what they need. + P) L$ p2 r% S$ ~" Y5 X
They feel envious of friends who get more—and someone will always get more.& J4 n: F# O' k9 Q
They feel disappointed, because enough is never enough.
, z3 t( N' S0 e6 d Long term, they develop materialistic values that equate personal celebrations with accumulating things.8 N. f# I) `0 A. ?# D# U& F
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For Parents:
1 ~# [' ~5 D" [# z2 XSome parents say they are happy with birthday parties that drive other parents up the wall. But we have talked to many parents who report these consequences.
: U' H3 c. C- ~$ s bThey feel pressured to “make” their child “happy” by meeting escalating community standards for parties. 5 g6 C* J. n( g+ p' X
They feel guilty if the party was below community standards that they don’t really agree with.
# z$ V, J& n! @8 V8 G" KThey feel overloaded with TOO MUCH STUFF, which they have to manage, organize, and clean up.
8 | d9 Z; F; I5 kThey feel an energy drain from planning, shopping, preparing, and hosting the party.* ?! V+ N$ a7 ^3 j3 W1 h
They feel regret or resentment afterwards when their child, or others, is not appreciative enough—“Why did I extend myself so much?”% w$ V) }2 n$ D4 O7 Z3 @
They run up debt from their own parties and from buying gifts for other parties.
1 \7 g+ u1 g4 |" n/ @" g! {They experience couple strife when parents do not agree on how big to make the party and how to carry it off.& v. c' \* @+ S1 D5 b
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& b8 S0 P1 b5 dFor the Community and Culture: + I" z7 n( J a/ _4 n9 o5 T
This issue is bigger than individual families. Personal decisions affect the wider world. Out of control birthday parties contribute to:
: n: ]* ^$ g0 B! I' ZA too much stuff culture
/ c5 b3 {! j& b1 V5 BA me first culture
: Z6 p" H. A2 a9 w0 J5 rA trash and waste culture
2 \8 U, O# x, `. i% u( vAn entitlement culture
( s1 F4 i3 y. }9 h# f) a2 j }+ HA envy culture
$ j& H4 t2 n/ { }4 d3 K1 h% MA more of everything culture |
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