 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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本帖最后由 三思 于 2011-4-16 09:04 编辑 6 D* ]* j0 ^, g/ s" c8 D! s! i
幼儿园还要再给他像你说的这样办一遍的,和家长弄是不矛盾的,美好记忆完全可以更多一点,没有必要限制,只要精力和财力允许,完全可以办生日会,生日会怎么算也算不着不好的风气
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娃是很知道party的special的, ...5 F& s3 @& g. X1 v: b
sweetlele 发表于 2011-4-15 22:43 
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我认为大型生日会是不良风气,因为一部分有精力财力的家庭给没有精力财力的家庭造成了压力,父母因为担心孩子因此受到压力,而不得不举办同样形式的生日会。而这种形式并没有赋予生日会特别的意义。比如乐乐你设定的20元礼物符合标准,一个月9个生日,180元礼品预算,承受不起的家庭,是不是就没有能力让自己孩子参加朋友的生日会这样的社交活动?5 N% N5 F5 w% |8 L1 d6 q8 l4 d" G
# F% B9 K$ K% A$ G. ?我家的财力精力大概不能和乐乐家比,但是我觉得给小孩子的生日大肆刷卡不是一件值得提倡的事情,有悖我的教育观念。
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" Y: B8 a1 m$ N4 i) R! j1 w另外,我搜了一下,中外对小孩子生日会都有反对声音。这个网站特别好,http://birthdayswithoutpressure.org/专门讲生日会的,为什么当前的生日会是不良风气,有比我更多更好的解释和说明。其中也提到了乐乐你说的学校办一遍家长办一遍的问题,提到了孩子要赶很多生日会的问题。9 H; k6 a9 i5 j- B
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对孩子的不良影响也有非常详细的列举
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For Kids: 9 V% N0 R+ ~8 y+ h. `) `& I
Not all children face each of these consequences, but enough children experience them to give us worry.
( E g' b* T0 ^% [5 uThey get stressed out from parties that are too large and too orchestrated.
4 O: M2 m1 H$ s' z- z. C9 G9 d. I5 H They are overindulged by too many presents. . @8 w; u, \* [
They feel entitled to what they want, not just what they need.
0 K; M) N9 ^/ v& p2 K2 w2 }6 ~They feel envious of friends who get more—and someone will always get more.
8 v" a/ r) S& } They feel disappointed, because enough is never enough.* V, ~0 r1 k; Y; h
Long term, they develop materialistic values that equate personal celebrations with accumulating things.
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- _1 ]. c5 c n7 H9 g& \. WFor Parents:
2 K# K& E c: fSome parents say they are happy with birthday parties that drive other parents up the wall. But we have talked to many parents who report these consequences.- O6 ?0 `! ]/ X& N
They feel pressured to “make” their child “happy” by meeting escalating community standards for parties.
/ D/ [% H& Q9 N+ f n- h$ @) yThey feel guilty if the party was below community standards that they don’t really agree with. ; S" R* T3 {: W+ f8 p+ l8 O/ z
They feel overloaded with TOO MUCH STUFF, which they have to manage, organize, and clean up.) v( X& h6 d, ]: L% L7 b
They feel an energy drain from planning, shopping, preparing, and hosting the party.- u( m q2 I- n0 [5 ^$ K4 S. N
They feel regret or resentment afterwards when their child, or others, is not appreciative enough—“Why did I extend myself so much?”
6 \2 M) M. \! d! s, fThey run up debt from their own parties and from buying gifts for other parties./ p5 O' h5 L& l9 n
They experience couple strife when parents do not agree on how big to make the party and how to carry it off.8 [ h. J) D+ d: @- D/ q
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For the Community and Culture:
- r6 p+ `8 L! W9 jThis issue is bigger than individual families. Personal decisions affect the wider world. Out of control birthday parties contribute to:( i: E8 S8 F% l& ?$ W; B q
A too much stuff culture
5 K, h' C4 z1 G7 i' F- W# b( FA me first culture
$ b* I6 N' ~. e8 aA trash and waste culture4 P$ d1 T5 v4 b: }% s
An entitlement culture9 ]% o: b' M: X
A envy culture- ?4 q5 X8 M3 P( r7 v
A more of everything culture |
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