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呼应海尼尼:一个男人的心声

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鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
* g* l# e" E3 i! K" g6 s+ _( M请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写
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% o' F9 j7 E, I& H$ X) ^. V1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.+ E6 B1 V, u# T: k! a' @
1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫6 {: W/ i  U5 V# {5 F0 R

& Y5 T) H8 D* L  F+ t% R8 P1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
5 d+ e4 ]2 h$ xdown./ e, f# B( W$ p
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
- L* z: r  n) T" M4 s% \you. G4 \3 l; {# z) S* H3 f
leaving it down.$ l; |( a: c! p4 k9 d2 q+ A
1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?
: h6 l, t: t' Z- X8 ~; z3 I# B& z) o  B0 ?8 F( h3 b
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
- u: E, @" c3 x; |4 c$ c; P* ]$ ~2 bLet it be.
3 b) V8 C, t) m1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去
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7 X$ t9 S% c+ Z1 b1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
' P& V4 B* t( N/ t& f6 H# xthat way.
( A8 x# n6 W7 S# H4 x4 a2 W1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!. n  ?, L5 g+ c) M% s, m) e( ^: @
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1. Crying is blackmail.
" G2 m$ P! c% a+ t% z' l& Z% g6 w' W1,哭泣是敲诈
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1. Ask for what you want.
6 T. h! D  }" E8 ]8 d8 PLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!# H4 h. E& T/ y+ s
Strong hints do not work!
) @) e9 @9 X% ^/ _$ iObvious hints do not work!
2 y7 s1 O7 O' h$ `8 b4 nJust say it!+ F! N" Z; x4 _; f) z0 {9 }8 t
1,你想要什么就说1 @8 g" u* O+ W( j
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!: ?( g* H$ V. d: {" a/ F! g

" f& [. }4 U  q1 l7 @1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
* }/ C( a0 }& C3 |. f, r- Nquestion.
& o% g9 @. X, m3 a6 Z1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)
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/ I- _4 Q" E* M( u2 U1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it.  That's0 A1 W1 c) e0 _/ q
what we do.- Y  o' B; e; n# F7 h. l
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
; A8 G, @( N/ U1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。
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- k4 L; R6 A% n7 d2 z1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.  See a doctor., |% V8 W7 [2 M1 b1 h' Q7 }9 E
1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去3 X. j3 K3 u9 a, m: n* e- ^

0 I' o  t9 P: ^, C# K1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
( o% L6 R- Y$ {- dIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
5 ^7 Q3 W2 X- h9 ^; S我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us5 L! R& b9 N7 H
to act like soap opera guys.( @/ i) M1 u- p4 f2 E
1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们! v. x4 V9 B$ O. x' R2 x

* b2 C% O" U! `* h$ g1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
  h# X* K% f* `  M% z& ]9 c1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们
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& O. h2 f( V0 ]8 k6 u1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
8 X7 Y0 c0 F* t7 e; ^; z0 E3 mmakes you sad or angry, we meant  the other one.
7 O9 ]3 `, }5 F1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。) j& ~& b* S: q" D
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(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢)/ ~  [; ^. _" v9 s4 Y5 k3 s% O
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it. ~- }9 O2 ~  t, t% s
done. Not both.
9 J) e7 v0 j! n2 E+ f/ EIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during/ M+ D* }5 f8 h/ J8 a* c1 k
commercials.
8 n  x/ ~. e$ k' a- }
" ]7 D9 I4 {0 u1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.. W  v1 I: L$ R9 i

: w9 S& H  [* u1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.9 M: i" b6 v8 [9 b/ X" e
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
/ G! \4 [  |; I* F, d0 x2 d# h* j& WWe have no idea what mauve is.4 s# R- d; n" v$ _2 N' i" r+ p
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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7 a# U+ _1 P( A* x$ `1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like, _& d. N  u1 Q+ O
nothing's wrong.$ B  r0 h/ @* z, g
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.* ?* l' S6 K. y2 T
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer6 d  Q9 a$ J1 b6 P4 I1 y9 o
you don't want to hear./ N) W  q( W0 Y% H& T. ?

: b' }8 \; _, h+ I1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is$ y) l" e2 w/ T+ A
fine...Really.
% U9 O$ V2 c' _% @" M2 X" ~/ O& S: y1 a; c: `
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to. {7 ~7 q: F5 V* b! I
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.  A# D6 j& o5 s% ~/ t

0 S. C" U& O, M4 |1. You have enough clothes.
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* T% [# z2 O5 E  ~( M- T7 @1. You have too many shoes.; A5 ?" ~/ L: K) @; }7 W
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1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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) Z( c5 m. C/ g( M" Y" y5 x2 x" p8 ~Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
! x. f% g+ a: @- ?But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
. w2 F$ m2 J8 ?- ~# FPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06 | 显示全部楼层
funny
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:10 | 显示全部楼层
试试哈。' [& b  A) Z( F3 o2 l  g
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1.You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want itdone. Not both.If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.你或者让我们去做事情或者告诉我们你想怎么做,但是千万别同时要求我们。你如果知道怎么样做最好,那么自己个儿做吧。# g  U4 D5 [# R" R$ B

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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
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% f% g7 [1 V/ W) I) m3 @7 t7 s1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
6 d' Q3 T) W3 y我们和克里斯托福。哥伦布一样不需要指导!# j& s  Y" H. _/ n0 n7 a
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# K: z7 P" o) T6 N+ N/ @1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.
# J. e8 t. s+ {& c3 P. ~所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。1 n- x, @2 A- |8 x/ k
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
: D# M% e) n' w% L7 s如果痒了就挠挠,我们就爱做实事。
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act likenothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1 r  F6 d( ~* p4 C) i如果我们问发生什么事了?你说没事,那就没事啊。我们知道你们在撒谎,可是那根本不值得讨论。3 k  C# K5 l4 p/ n8 u4 p

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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answeryou don't want to hear.2 Z8 b0 H% F+ S$ O/ Z7 a2 g0 _1 v
如果你一定要问一个你不想知道答案的问题,那么就别指望能听到你想要听的答案。
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 04:10 PM:
* q- y9 W; _/ F& e9 t. `& \, {ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.
' V) m! q: @: |. S  D; c8 C2 \所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。) {  O2 F. T) c) D
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这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置8 i" d" h, h& I
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Isfine...Really.
* p9 U  Q% g6 u7 L# S* k# i如果我们要去哪里,你无论穿什么都绝对很好。。。真的不骗你1 \" g. Q3 C" S' d  E" N7 s

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6 o# b. g+ |  R1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared todiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
9 d( M! P. T+ r) V* v+ I不要问我们在关心什么,除非你已经可以讨论诸如棒球、橄榄球或高尔夫等话题。
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5 o* o& |1 j+ T7 c5 S: y1. You have enough clothes.
" P% ~* C9 w3 W% o  H你的衣服足够多了7 n9 p  V# D9 h3 c  }5 r

+ E. F+ U2 c. ^4 l6 n1. You have too many shoes.
) D# p: U+ Z( \2 O/ \9 m6 f# \你的鞋子也太多了吧" j: \2 `0 V+ d; v
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1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!; L8 X# g# g: f7 s, a' g
我很有型啊,你能说球型不是一种型吗?
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! A7 q, d* o7 s( G1. Thank you for reading this.
0 _& u7 z+ a1 G- j  x7 }多谢你能看完这个' l7 k: V6 p1 R4 n# I  R

; [! D& W4 i. J$ {9 RYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.0 p' v) D. g7 S- \7 s  |
我知道今晚我得睡沙发了,但你知道吗,男人们一点儿都不会介意这个的,不就是野营嘛。
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:28 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 三思 at 2005-11-11 04:26 PM:$ t) {; v* m3 T3 s) R; ]
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这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
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应该说还是海妮妮心眼实,办好事。嘿嘿5 Z3 v- n2 B  _+ P

+ {1 P/ J5 l5 i0 U! I' G9 \玩玩,献丑了哈
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:35 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
最后一句真绝阿
鲜花(1394) 鸡蛋(16)
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 03:26 PM:
5 ]$ q% O0 s+ H) [1. You have enough clothes.* e0 k3 A+ G/ D# H' O0 [
你的衣服足够多了6 ?$ u* \' [9 g3 @7 W. k. Q

+ K& C- u# S1 V% Y! _) }1. You have too many shoes.2 Z; E2 Q! H! z  H9 Z
你的鞋子也太多了吧

# t8 r& }+ l  t; V* ~这两句话我经常对LD说,但是她说NO。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 17:26 | 显示全部楼层
大型搬家
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 17:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?# B. }' h/ ]3 {8 z

# d4 J; C; t* ]+ I% o4 Z----这句话我劳工常说,我就。。。。忍了。尤其看《幸存者〉的时候,电话都不接。但是观看期间他可以跟我说话,不许我说
鲜花(10) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 20:39 | 显示全部楼层
1. Ask for what you want.9 A! N- s; v0 `( L& v5 s  f: I
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!+ m' m$ C! W( K! J& C3 k  g
Strong hints do not work!
& m% D6 f# l: V' jObvious hints do not work!
6 x" s& a: C/ M  \7 VJust say it!/ W/ }' j' ~% H2 z9 r" x2 x3 T
1,你想要什么就说! k5 g7 g0 I9 j
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!9 O; v0 F; N  N, J

9 f/ j5 f5 y# j, Z* Q. a关于这一条,我老公只认准了一条hint,只要我在晚上洗了澡,头发湿淋淋的下楼和他说话,他就坚决认为我是在暗示他炒饭了!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 蓝海 at 2005-11-11 09:39 PM:
( C) p+ T& E( T3 S/ ]& p1. Ask for what you want./ X- W$ Z2 I' S: [9 y! `
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
$ U" K* y) t3 `$ ]/ C8 o4 P4 AStrong hints do not work!/ v! {8 S, n- e9 h" n0 O+ H
Obvious hints do not work!' P* |3 l, T' a1 Z, E4 b" H2 o
Just say it!
! Y5 V' O/ ?! B* b9 V1,你想要什么就说$ f% h2 v8 e" W6 l
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管 ...

1 {3 I, ]. n- Z3 `% w2 r3 j" G/ N% y- T! \# n, J5 J, Y
瓦赛
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 00:49 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 09:33 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 01:49 AM:
( s, [2 C; [$ o& z被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????

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咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿
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4 ]. V% Z/ C! w+ qhttp://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 15:59 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-14 09:33:: q1 x3 M1 x6 y1 x6 ?/ Y  }- ~

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咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿
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0 E. k: i9 ?+ @, Ghttp://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
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( {* b8 o) M: f, V: M: Q3 t这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。
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; e1 a3 d  D; x( D) d还想问问你的体会呢!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 16:21 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 04:59 PM:
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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。9 o  [! E0 U0 P
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还想问问你的体会呢!
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2 J- a/ x" ~! n& B, w* _: o5 q体会?# r! o. H* }2 A( B2 ~

) \& S' D  R1 u/ C; {5 b回答到那个帖子下面了
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