 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
+ R! Q7 ?- f: f3 u- P. \请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写/ l. l, h$ Q& ^
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
( r( U, b6 ^# s" M1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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3 a- D i. t4 h1 R1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it- Y8 Y2 C+ s. C$ }9 ~5 y
down.! L1 S3 y8 W; _1 a5 t
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about " M) h: O( W& F# X6 I& }* [& N" X
you8 f! b. I4 w4 z- r
leaving it down.; N/ B. _. e1 n; F3 O5 B4 b
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
8 W0 t% a7 o5 c( ~; q6 I& mLet it be.
6 M' v5 q9 N: t4 E3 P- S1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去% l; j- x3 b* L! \9 _
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it1 O3 C5 c4 c' m: j$ r- p2 Q* }8 D
that way." s3 t) f: G Q* K' R r
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！1 J: V4 U. B9 d m; D. z5 j
2 w3 H0 y& O' J6 R! ~' z1. Crying is blackmail.
/ K4 l, e4 ~% n5 }1，哭泣是敲诈9 T; d* V& A, e- M8 J
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1. Ask for what you want.
% j) A2 j3 G0 C$ q, nLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
6 C- F* m, p9 t$ m$ CStrong hints do not work!
) U, v1 E+ o3 V. u% G/ b) E1 VObvious hints do not work!) P- M! R C+ |0 n
Just say it!( [. a# X3 V* A# x5 L8 J F- _, y
1，你想要什么就说
5 Q& T6 B6 h& R p7 A9 x( ~我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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j) u7 o: J; z) G& \- @1 z4 }1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
* e2 i+ ~6 m3 C# x# Aquestion.7 G @+ P/ ]+ C7 L# l
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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: H, l9 y$ z+ v# G' }1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
5 l) ^. |( g5 J; g% [; \what we do.4 v( |: H3 ]2 V6 `8 l8 I' v
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.: M7 Y2 E! J8 P0 I6 Q' l' ^1 Y
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。6 A$ x* a# t1 L9 F% H7 t& S
* V, T# j: n% f W1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.! s9 ~. ]# T: p7 ~! ?) S
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去4 ?' M/ t- a j9 x, L* W1 @
1 T) n4 s/ @. u# k, S2 ]1 l a. ^6 d, l1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.% y5 A2 f1 V6 O4 {- E/ C. P1 A
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
! t* N) L5 q6 [' h) }( e( H' b我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us, {* g& j l7 x, \ _6 s" g* J
to act like soap opera guys.
: W+ j5 X. f; t) S0 F1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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" z9 F4 T4 a* j# X1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
9 o( ?- ?# c% e5 V1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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( F" ]9 S1 L3 M! y1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
9 z, e+ T8 ?" m2 Q( _0 s _* Gmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
. b' f# f( \5 c+ a) ^9 j9 v$ l! q1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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U# y) _8 c/ [/ F（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）9 q* [2 H: v0 D2 G/ [3 Z
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it$ w" Q$ W; ]0 S& x2 g2 M s
done. Not both.5 n2 T6 Z+ h8 ?- _( V1 @- I
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during+ R' N- e3 l0 |9 q, v
commercials.6 x! }: M$ ] q6 H
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.& g. ^5 k3 Z% G Z# r( _' m; k
- Y# {: g. p- [$ r+ Y- j1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
+ r6 x% b0 b' h5 h3 y; bPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
) C6 k4 b% Z% n) }* ], U) u7 uWe have no idea what mauve is.
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6 P! q6 W' M# u7 X6 n1 G: {, H/ `1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.$ ~0 n5 D' `* k4 s! O& a' [ W, Y
. u, O# y5 N) X0 C1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
+ P. y. ?8 _+ `9 t3 {; t* Gnothing's wrong.
) p4 W2 _9 t. I" h" |* h) l2 q EWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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@! t! U# B0 O9 o" K& ]1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer" t# Z& s& I; r5 ^) r C
you don't want to hear.! r3 d8 }/ r. o3 } {- m
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is3 |, v, @0 |5 k' Q
fine...Really.% {. o& O- g. O) ^
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to' @; e6 c- g' s9 A9 l- ~
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.0 D" A% t+ D. n# b0 d6 ~4 i
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1. You have enough clothes.
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/ T9 ]: Q( c% E$ t7 K1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.% Z9 `+ g- s) \# ?7 C. t
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
% N1 m- |7 r& a# ^6 Q. |But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping./ n/ G/ F8 U @9 T! _9 Q0 l
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.9 Y2 x8 M- ^ `. E- ~
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
