 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
6 A" a' D% g- [- i( J请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.: ^3 y2 l. H4 A. s' o9 z( |
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it5 N- u% q y& t4 C
down.3 S8 N, e) x4 C; r: n
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
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leaving it down.( @( G; ?, J0 o8 T5 i( u
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？# Z* V6 ]4 ~, E$ U
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.9 M) k7 Y0 E6 s) T) @
Let it be.2 R( m X5 U V+ \1 ?
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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' D8 G/ b' V) F4 l8 ]1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
" B, f, X) I6 Q7 t5 z8 Rthat way.
2 }6 v, n/ U( [1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.0 r' N4 G8 I& r; s1 V
1，哭泣是敲诈% ?# h1 K/ e8 @; X/ T* I
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1. Ask for what you want.3 a' f) N* {& D8 V9 w8 H+ i/ K
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
Q+ J' j+ u7 w& i3 n$ NStrong hints do not work!, r- ?7 Y$ I2 g. @
Obvious hints do not work!" m7 T( ~ D! e* F' a B% z8 d
Just say it!
& x, {* L: Y/ d% l- h, o1，你想要什么就说
8 E J, T2 q9 h我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every * V9 b) r' `; F# H- f; B3 S
question.' k n( m) n- o( e, {9 X7 {
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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' e5 O0 K- U! H1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's" M# ^1 t J! f* E0 |, M N
what we do.
: W& O" m6 a) u3 e1 NSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.5 v* K' A+ Q# l- {% A
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。$ [/ |9 W2 Q+ R, K
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
4 `7 a2 n1 Z! m1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去. }; {) ]! G# m. O& @) Z; R, O
l' i3 w- b9 k; \) \6 L# ]1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
/ Q% u' Q% c. u7 c& S9 }5 ]/ dIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.) X/ `, }/ G3 }
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了# u! v8 ?+ c* B. i% |
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
/ m( Q0 i, ~# l9 tto act like soap opera guys.
; L: V5 a& J3 ]2 G: B2 l0 I8 `1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们$ W, i! a' K3 ~$ ^9 n2 F
+ @9 {& U6 ?4 @2 S1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
4 d" _; ?8 e$ g1 l* ~( i1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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6 V; L; n/ r/ @+ Z, F1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
3 @% L; y' E" y1 K; Tmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.' z1 o4 E) T- k C. i0 q9 t
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
' W# D5 d& W- A T" I1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it" O3 X" |" e* j3 N' h: h- |
done. Not both.
# w, \; Y! \6 Q7 v7 M$ X/ m$ XIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.6 y' j. N0 _" Z2 [" G) c6 c5 h
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during1 E# I- F9 t" b
commercials.
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) C7 J5 m! t( f+ m" ?0 Z5 O1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.' d* a" _# b: ?4 m* }0 g
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. `- V& t b# A. U* n1 I
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
2 m, s: C$ s9 T0 L5 D2 i9 N+ _We have no idea what mauve is.5 y) W. D/ [: e0 x" }5 |
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
/ ^+ K2 ~3 k, d- \* D) d' rnothing's wrong.
8 D* K1 h( @6 z0 v/ R* oWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
9 q# r5 y. _* e, y! iyou don't want to hear.( G. S! e8 I U5 F8 x" z
- S9 u7 d3 l8 Q* a1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is* f' @3 p) L& t2 H
fine...Really.7 L8 r6 ^4 q9 ^( p7 g/ Q
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
( Q8 r# W& W' l% N# |2 F" ldiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.4 L# Y8 I& W$ x- T: L+ \
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1. You have enough clothes.7 G0 z2 r( r& f/ _! r
7 O& I7 M8 `1 C7 \7 B/ s1. You have too many shoes.+ W# r0 m2 A& o0 y6 ?0 d, }9 u
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!6 D% G4 s- r) l+ m' X8 c
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1. Thank you for reading this.7 \5 w! W. y% d/ r/ x! Z/ K
8 x1 k7 H6 c4 W9 l1 |/ KYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;+ f& l$ a* ]# {3 h
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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! B6 H0 K+ P' p w$ JPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.; ]* I2 j: i9 ?6 |7 f! m$ I
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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