 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!- s+ f7 v# y' E
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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" a5 E* U: p2 o6 @* ^9 |& O- }1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
. g, P; O: G3 o# B. O F1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫. I0 E4 d: P8 D. L
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
& x0 I \. o7 _3 ^down.
* Q \, |( {# V! VWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about % U) T6 h$ U7 c4 P, F) U: l! ?3 u
you6 Z( R& G8 c6 ^
leaving it down.- e4 e! ~& k/ N
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
/ p9 j# H: S& `7 t! ]* B% C0 q: Q BLet it be.
: u% f8 l/ R, Z# R+ z1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去2 Q3 a6 c) i& H
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it9 o6 M7 K; C$ _7 E' p/ H. l4 H i* M- B
that way.* |( k0 q/ T" j k. F
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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$ K) }$ m: M( Q+ J% u* i k1. Crying is blackmail.' O- R* a3 M4 j0 q- u
1，哭泣是敲诈
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: R# C5 F/ U) y2 S1. Ask for what you want.& X1 X; a% Y6 w, p E* R4 h
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!4 [ k, o- C1 W8 N/ v: V
Strong hints do not work!
+ n3 T2 ]* t( X. x# eObvious hints do not work!3 a% G( l) J9 W$ O& h
Just say it!
1 i9 L( G5 v" ~7 H d1，你想要什么就说
6 u& x4 E7 T# w; i8 @- k* x4 M我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！- ~" T( g0 |2 Z# h2 O" W8 J7 q
& `" M1 f' I# B' Z* W/ F, w1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
$ f& u* z! |! L% ?5 S: dquestion.- |( X8 u* K1 @, q/ F3 r
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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; v# g" R7 R1 z1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's5 u4 A9 ~% P/ ], J. _+ I
what we do.0 S: E: ~5 t$ F' L5 A9 |' @4 s9 m
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
0 v+ P- n$ [* G' w1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。 Q5 M+ W1 Y5 e
* u9 ]8 c& q- t: S4 w; P. Y1 K6 b2 n( q1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
6 Z4 k, B6 f' l& U* w0 [- N+ C$ G; v1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去: |9 j0 k# q2 V7 M- }9 p* {
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
, V6 h, V6 `4 f/ I4 l* [In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.4 x. _3 t" C* }3 a0 d
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了, q }4 i6 F2 {8 u- x
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us8 O. K8 s4 H1 Z O' U- M# p
to act like soap opera guys.
, ^$ M$ t% |- j7 y1 Q! {% t9 W4 x1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们4 B& t. s) r- a0 e& o
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.5 m0 W' k: r4 W: D# @
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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4 z$ Y6 J; ?8 w5 p" w) a! V1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways* O5 g3 Y- T* V! ]+ K
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
! F2 n f, A4 K7 f1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
- ?" J; c+ ~4 |: ?1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it, C/ \ D4 r/ E/ f& e5 J
done. Not both.& c; o1 j2 y% Z9 g8 C' P
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
' V0 D+ ^5 J3 t3 @ I; t, tcommercials.
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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! z2 \6 y. ^! H6 o4 R5 ?. S/ O1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.6 _- b0 f# d7 P- a. b* W6 p
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.# G7 ?' }! ?, H. O7 W2 `
We have no idea what mauve is.
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.& l; b, r# f* @4 b' n6 [: w: V
% X( i( `+ _ c7 T \1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like4 n6 k! N2 R" z8 O; a. n8 e
nothing's wrong.
. ~% a n2 K& T5 ~/ B, [: FWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.3 B. b5 O G# P0 T8 {. ]
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer( R4 a& S& x& m
you don't want to hear.
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, H6 m) D. \) {1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
6 r& X% ]& f$ tfine...Really.' Q* d5 B) f; I w/ K
9 F. Z! t: {* G. S% }" o2 W1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to* Q0 a. l2 @( y( B* X
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.9 e3 t! c) C0 O. ~4 E+ {: U+ Y, U
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1. You have enough clothes." T9 v1 U' A* u! n5 Y2 U
8 ^* M$ i* j U& s& u' e8 w, D1. You have too many shoes.! Z4 n+ N! Y4 ?& |- u
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; G* y8 `+ i* I) v, ^
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.# r5 r8 Z- {8 P+ v, ^% d+ w
" c" `7 W+ L+ }" B7 ]$ i. p* SPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh. d+ C$ H# D# W
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
