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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:" E5 a2 I8 g( ?$ u7 ~- f
' T; F/ v7 c7 X. d5 t1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
) b% n2 B6 ^( ?2 m) B( ]hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
! m5 D. g' j) S- b) uyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
; ?! A5 z) V, K1 Nlanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.7 O& D5 q& |4 T) r
" V( b3 O, ]6 D6 e4 D4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its3 |) y" V0 s* i P
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest6 p$ r6 s& b; B" d4 l
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
% n& w7 ^- o" y% xgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
! p; X" M2 T! ?& _phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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. J4 z. U: Z _9 s5 U4 I" ~5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, p; C/ R5 H: C* w
cussed out, and possibly shot.8 P# @" A7 H1 x8 h/ n% ]
5 ]7 Y. U3 z. l x" v P. M1 Y6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
* {' R. h9 s. ^6 c8 G+ Zget you shot.& q( \+ g0 Y( a- d) u- F
; u4 W2 ^! N: M! Z7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that( e! d4 H3 X6 ], ]; v" G
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
3 S0 }9 ?, \$ x/ X* Dthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
' h. N7 y5 t" `; H. N, |you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first, g9 o" d* v E7 e+ v# N0 ]
vehicle through the intersection.
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1 x# v" I/ E K. V8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
8 L+ H4 |- \ ^3 O6 abarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next# m4 v& u; i# z4 k' x2 Z/ t7 j
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and0 P" b8 ^" p4 k) m% |
more construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,; u% I0 v0 L* |; R1 S2 V% y( d5 N
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
: q9 L# N& y5 z; Z- s' b/ a4 ?+ X# isquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.+ \" _) Q, }0 N% D3 O
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same# G& C) @2 z6 m, u B
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye3 y2 R+ {" g; N, `
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and5 q& L( l8 a2 j5 Y) i
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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7 W) P* K( x, k3 N- M11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the% X* r4 S' K/ a; G5 G1 d+ |- `: e# J
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,/ B$ c: z; w8 q- E0 B
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
% S1 H' ~- n% u! a1 l* Laccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.* r4 F; I+ r$ j% K1 H
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
+ i& ^( w# s2 }9 i. {( alined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
. B' B$ G/ u6 T$ G( ?) e( F* N8 Mblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
