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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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+ H( ]! A% h. h& g- S1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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1 a/ r c; Z1 ]/ P2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
$ k! U1 y, _: m3 mhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
. j( B: {9 e: }7 g f4 amorning.8 Y9 v s( X5 F3 c
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
9 k q1 {% y9 ~- L0 Syou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
5 o( D7 u# H# \3 v8 P, _0 @landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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; A! X2 d( U( j4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
5 r8 Y7 a' e: L2 z, k: k$ gown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest8 ?5 O" y) d& G ^1 f4 h; I
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires E8 R" ~' ^" p- Q r0 X
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
) o# P. h2 C- @$ kphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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9 T' X6 i% k; i& N5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,, ]/ ~2 L/ {$ }( e# H/ T: Z
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can0 F, t+ q6 j$ ~& J; W+ R* a
get you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that. y- ?! B. D M; t7 \
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
3 P. {) H& s: o8 P, ?% R3 Qthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
) S% \8 i0 {- J) X' M: k- oyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first( B/ e3 D. _- z9 b
vehicle through the intersection.4 o- l* R2 d: j( A
6 j# q% w& |. f% \# l6 J ^8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
1 |) k( A1 p+ v% q5 @3 y+ sbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
7 H( F& K5 q9 hday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
) g5 L/ s, c0 Nmore construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,1 K3 B! S3 ]% P+ P4 h, Q
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,* d- q4 G% ~5 q- O: j( Z8 u
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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( s; `3 d4 i4 i7 G10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
; g& g7 b: I/ T/ o6 H' L+ X' Mroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
; z! ]5 U+ y. LRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
% {+ ^6 C. `% ~66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
# m3 C2 K+ S* k j; F' M4 Hshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
6 {# M: G3 i* d4 W# h) VActivated.'; J% |% K4 p! Z# k
1 D* F7 N# M6 s g12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,- P. b5 l8 c' y" d" X7 M f: v
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'2 R4 Y" ?) a3 o3 Q6 t: I; q
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.6 Y s- t; g# U' Y$ x
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur- }+ s; A( Y6 }& c' [& @+ u
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and$ i8 J! ], r+ \9 _& `6 s
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
