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Tiger s Holiday Poem
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0 A, }) n* h3 kTwas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house; k7 S' c- x$ q
Tiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.! J5 ?: [8 _3 o y) {
She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,
5 X: H' B8 F7 y9 ?# d9 DCause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.
3 X! L) ~) Q, W3 g+ p) N iHe’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.& n# h+ C F3 l& z! T" f& @+ M
Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.7 b3 A; B7 t2 M" l+ @
He’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,
& M1 d F* G; p1 {With Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.3 ^1 H$ n. q. {* G j1 k
From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
e# N8 c8 Y5 N( A% _( u9 Z0 KTiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.: R$ R0 ^/ C0 I
With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,
& X8 O% V- o8 Q# V& x1 ~When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.
; u. r- F2 \0 mDespite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',- g$ S4 \9 c. g8 I7 d1 V8 { g0 F n
Tiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .
$ c6 Z% }1 ` S( UAnd I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,: I0 \& t+ z! I- \1 T
"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."' ` Q+ A) {7 T0 z" C. S9 t! j
She’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer," C' l. n- m( }) _; L
Her prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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