 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.# ]. K+ ` P1 l/ _* k! e1 F
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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& Y7 V' U0 x- @% ~, S+ EI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.; t" q% Y& \. s# j& c7 s# K7 h
$ r& \, ^/ |; ~& cI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?") u' \( c+ w) X# J. [
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?( b# u6 O8 k R# ]
, h3 `5 D' ]3 ^+ nAnd the second one was:
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: J& P8 o N* I"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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0 X* {) M- F3 ]9 h! b" m: x5 uI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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( }* u s8 G0 G0 w# i"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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" n& h' P( `3 z0 C1 ?& a4 ZI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?" w2 |2 _6 _ A, r" {' [
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!! `5 F% s4 n" \3 U, O i% t2 U1 _
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."+ ]! z+ v& s) L2 ?" `
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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2 o$ |' V/ a" x0 W: uThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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?" i$ K/ r+ g) e) {Thank you very much!
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) A' I, i2 ~2 v3 V+ M4 Z1 JImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:0 J/ `& [# F' x6 ~% p( L: @
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.5 A& N# I4 S+ A: c
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.3 u- M! ?) Z1 _) _7 K; l. x5 u1 T
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".+ W; F' \4 B, r
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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{" Z8 ], f4 c1 I5 Z. w5 I- ]& h8 VThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
