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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.& V2 u: m9 M* b& P6 c3 h
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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' \2 g6 g% d* CI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.& t/ U1 m" L: ~! a* n! i

9 N( W; A! h1 m2 U& V8 V: sI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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- N) e3 ~% H6 x0 }6 l"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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% c- p0 Y  F; mI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:* [) F* S3 x% I8 N
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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# P! j/ c. [, vI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?$ W6 F* ^, G! \" k1 x0 Q( k( c
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?": x- E3 ^# B% f- z

# ]( o4 R# ?' S* tI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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* \0 l. {/ z  @2 h* S( {I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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! [3 I5 u/ K  _9 l* PI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."6 m" J: @: o7 s" `

) g; H8 ?6 @- U! Z4 JSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?") W; u3 V# G, o! `1 |) _7 R- Z. q
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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; g; Z) k1 ?! aThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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8 W" C# Y) T7 ], bImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:2 W, l1 Z( j; C* s

1 Y& m% i1 Q, t; Z) F- L8 ~6 @& s1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.& T% r" S) f: y, r

: e1 B6 a) c% X" S, X2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.; l+ Q/ o( U+ l1 n/ V, u  h' j# e! e
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion., u: ~3 E: z, D, \2 l8 p! G

, r- u' T% A4 K$ }+ s4 C3 @& TJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".( M- p5 A8 N0 C9 l. }
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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1 e; W% Q2 C/ X+ B# ~+ ~The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
% j; l+ Q$ s. Y( [; Q# Ca young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
  W) L4 |/ z" Z怎么理解?
& K2 C" C' u( b( M0 H50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
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50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
0 X1 D& ^# K! Z9 B8 Mcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
大型搬家
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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