 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol4 d% o7 g4 F# ^ f$ V7 t
+ W" V/ h, f2 `. e# s& ~- ?
% z) O( Q& z( `3 q8 y8 y! e, t- v8 ~' i9 e3 }
Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
5 t6 ]5 G: \. I; H: }% n6 \- e8 Y7 H% U0 X& K# k7 `
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
, |( J0 E# G- m ?7 m
' Q1 g. X$ u0 R* H7 }5 Z$ i
& Y! Q* G7 A( s& `" u, a2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.: j* F& y) @+ [8 t; s8 d' ~
' n3 k0 n; w7 E1 m3 n& {
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
/ Z/ R7 [" U2 S! W7 N8 _5 x# x( h
* X8 `8 D u- c7 [4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.; t" R) Z2 h7 B7 c0 b z
) W; q& J( W; g( A5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5 r9 Z. _" u/ g- h* c P* q1 X. B m+ ^ i% O
H# ]) _8 K! d6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area5 F' m3 n0 d% {' A& r% K2 j3 @
# L" V0 k& `5 E7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
. W. B! o ^4 M( S5 O8 u Y7 h8 v% a6 h6 j8 a7 D* f
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask& o$ c) n4 V$ B
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
4 V4 s1 i! L1 |( q2 c# w( f% t- a' J. M; L2 P2 O% ~
9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
) Z r5 m1 _$ h$ v
) x; V5 I& F. V# `10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.. Z" {6 [/ v/ Z r
* x' @ L$ m2 B* }& k11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.0 z3 B7 R5 g/ u
' B3 N Y4 S0 g! j/ P, A12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
* u5 x, Z1 k8 W; h9 ]1 i3 W: U5 f* l8 N7 g
13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!) _3 [! Q% g7 Y/ {4 h& a- i3 I
* C% N. G }, C1 w
14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
6 N6 y p4 u A, B$ _. M
1 d# D5 {1 W/ |7 c9 o5 T+ EAnd; last, but not least!)
" F4 e: ?+ C8 b+ N) Y* v4 f15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
9 x" r% b" v: c( q% w/ x
发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
