English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
" l% Q! m% Y4 c8 J$ e" \1 U4 JEnglish is a stupid language.
# s; A/ e6 {- G2 x" r$ b+ JThere is no egg in the eggplant
4 R# @. v  Q. [7 d: B7 X8 ~4 zNo ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
4 l# w0 s  p7 {' E2 K2 CEnglish muffins were not invented in England
1 ?/ q4 t+ D0 Q  k7 BFrench fries were not invented in France.

6 c3 v5 J! _* x% V4 a) P+ DWe sometimes take English for granted
: N0 X( q. F1 S2 E% L6 f" W5 `But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
. h* [: l2 X3 c& o. W& D9 qQuicksand takes you down slowly
# J  {% c6 U5 E' F5 o; ]; XBoxing rings are square
! o6 Z& l' z& zAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

8 Z9 G7 M9 y, T2 O4 W1 }If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
% p6 L9 s" \. o6 k3 cShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
/ Z; q6 ^0 C. ~2 P# S2 k7 F' YIf the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.

/ h, }3 U. E% X' ~, s* fIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
; d& H5 M* S( k: p7 YWhy do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways

) |  Z/ F' K( v) g) P! x: {You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
1 h7 z8 h) i- g- y! z# D: e" QOf a language where a house can burn up as
, R, @) k4 x0 N3 s6 X2 fIt burns down
" n1 w8 P: q# W1 X; L5 m0 p' _And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
$ b& {- N' C6 P+ |: v# _And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
4 X! Y6 f  g$ K3 UAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
3 }, `8 j" I" I) f2 rIt starts
+ P% z3 O6 b& FBut when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
, \4 c, G( G, Y; k! s1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
3 C, J* w' G3 x: G, w( L* Z2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
( y. D( e" j# \* v: l) W3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
0 `8 d/ e7 I7 k4 T  P0 r" @6 w4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
: u; d+ i$ _' C7 h2 q8 |3 X. r# i其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
( _) `$ k, P7 M1 [9 c/ E* o, F1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

8 c2 R0 |* n- a8 K* J' k2 G4 L
6 x* k! I. r1 T6 N( G. p" d& W谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下
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