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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
- [1 D: R! w. ^: H4 M; {long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb) A0 z) ~* i$ K) Y. [( A7 j
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
1 u" T) f8 a4 I. A% a! Z4 cthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
6 \9 q$ ]& F2 @* Y; `( P* W) \: |. x0 w  
7 D1 y9 ?3 V( K& _: O The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
, j/ E8 _* o0 b he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The# x1 V1 O9 m- S3 s) r# H) F
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
# D/ ~- e  ^& x3 \! j$ Hask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,4 ^6 @& @% v' m/ T- c9 `, G
you pay me only $5.
& q  {& u' U  `% S( ?+ q
: [8 }: O0 v5 [, M. b( f" e+ t4 I2 M+ [ You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
* f4 k  k1 f- O3 U will pay you $500. , s4 v+ l. d9 P! h4 d

1 l% `. y$ |8 U0 A1 L0 T/ Z1 ]/ n# O This catches the newfie's attention and to keep" ~* ~* t" T5 Q/ p
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ' b4 V( D9 Y: k7 {6 j( n( |9 \
( i" S4 o3 c* D& u: B( v( ?8 e, x& E
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's& L$ F! k1 t  q. @6 X+ b
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' , L0 s4 u( E; K7 y/ @5 E. e

% M5 Y1 q, ^6 uThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
& C+ P2 L3 Q; U& g: Y4 Q0 T' J4 x  Npocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the2 R/ C  c: m5 l5 x) ]/ T
lawyer. 1 Y! F' ~+ z! h7 y/ \
8 [6 |$ `, w1 S3 i. N
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with: E( }; l9 X: i% k- }- U
three legs, and comes down with four?'   I) E9 c. ^- L; m3 |" l

6 o* d5 V" F$ j' tThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all0 L" ~( C" g1 I6 F( y3 V& y
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all/ S+ V- m1 f$ w3 Y/ A
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
. I% R) S6 X! Hof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
& d- K& A9 C* Jhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
$ t: {4 O' r' e. c/ gback to sleep.
4 Z+ Y  l% K- h' h* y# c* d
; x/ R$ u  T; Z( t  nThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He& }+ ^& G1 n' w$ t. z" k0 Z
wakes the newfie up and asks, 7 A6 Z% Z9 F' n, z5 \* ~( w. P

1 R' q- z: L1 I9 m'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
- t  }9 Q. W. b% f6 a. q9 n) Ocomes down with four?'
+ e# {: S0 r7 i( f; K6 r" b0 g
) n' \0 @* Y( N" `' g: u# uThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
0 j& _/ }$ }" r& Oand goes back to sleep.. ]4 O* l& @4 l4 H8 X; p, y- A
+ h' p% Q/ W2 w0 u$ P# g: a
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!/ g! D$ }, U- s1 }

! Y/ R, k& A7 l8 PLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
7 [0 o" c7 H) q, _( d$ S0 a5 r
/ A* V: p; n% N/ Q>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two / F; V2 A' V" [7 d
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
- B. a0 C8 w( O& i>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the " O/ b2 ]3 Y6 [# i$ p8 g) d, d- h
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, % g; D8 i2 |  h. k+ k
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
1 F6 w6 v; ]" v6 U0 k8 b
$ l" O: l" s; c) F( s% F>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research % {# d( M+ Z  ]/ F. S
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a $ e0 o1 L3 O$ h0 ?3 u* l
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more ( S4 e1 J  P0 ?1 U( C2 P, L, G
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
* A/ i  r6 z  U8 D4 ]2 I>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
7 F0 F% X1 m' z+ h# a# P0 @7 W) E* O' t7 M" q
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
, m9 ~, m1 m# J! J( G% d>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
% Z. M; ^. m( |$ j% x! ]1 _  z>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
- T& G/ [+ C( i& W4 f& F" D>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 8 f" H: r# A, {; }& e% k
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a. o& F% r" w  k( c  W
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb% d# _, ^2 }/ {
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if% D! j$ ?3 g7 Q' f
the newfie would l ...

: r" Y4 X4 S, c
0 \& |& k" ~+ V" P& b5 V* A2 G( |
0 y( q- u. t. t5 ~2 f* D1 X9 {好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
9 u3 l3 \: n9 @( M: U“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,( m! _: J0 ?' N, n0 \
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
: c" }7 D& ]% o1 }; V加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
/ l$ w8 _, N; e: B
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 4 ^" j4 g, ~% \! {; U0 r4 o2 Z

. ?6 Z1 l! |" n' w% V
2 u! F( r" z/ B/ s
! H% H% i4 w. A  w好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
8 H" O- C" X1 a: h* ?6 C8 Q“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
/ M( `2 J4 l% y/ O好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
+ y9 B- [. t1 S6 s, K" c
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
9 G6 L* Y! @6 s( V5 r) ]
  w% ]; Z0 m! M( j3 n/ X" _0 H真聪明,偶像啊

4 W" L2 u) y0 m. X
$ Y' D, o' {% e6 B; a) B全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 8 m" [" C% I5 L; c* V' C

, |0 u7 P3 ?7 C: Y
, R) c+ g" g2 k$ K全盘接受一下。
* z. f4 q* R0 G8 d+ }3 r. D
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
' Q* k! Y$ g5 q$ Z( C& d
" J8 Z& m' X, C, C5 M% p' ~& G真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

6 m, _1 v5 j7 G! c9 {# @1 Z- y
5 [  b8 |6 L& L8 `6 P/ D6 [
5 w% \" a5 b5 z3 Q5 V8 Y别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
1 a' |) t4 S3 T. l* X6 o" Z! L" Q1 g  G' X* I

8 O4 P! P3 N( Z7 y- M( V, g" Z! l9 k2 _+ p1 i# a
别把我往坏路上领啊。

" o$ }, S! H  @, B9 ~, m你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
6 g% ?& c* B; X1 r# d加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
8 b7 h: y$ H. O! C
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 8 w# t! X9 l* y& X
& r2 O/ e, x. M5 K# S$ G; e3 o
真博学,偶像啊。
9 W! A+ \! w2 Y$ Z6 d5 Z% r; a  F
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 2 @( s. V, A/ ^

/ d5 v3 q, J% K/ M6 |( O大学教授哦,能不剥削?

+ R+ r' r( F  b5 r她是大学教瘦?. |2 ^+ ]4 g4 |3 L
大学教胖还差不多 1 j& \6 c2 l$ G1 H4 O7 b" ~
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
) W" G- c- f2 ^; e9 Y, \2 O4 J紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
( p$ @1 S8 A) Q) N1 ]$ S
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 . v/ j2 q) t! E" S8 V0 Q" h
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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# T# S" L' h  A
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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