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) a+ l8 |7 H9 `6 _. |7 k2 n8 xWhy did God make mothers?. X6 x) b$ ]6 R1 e
9 s9 D% u& E( j$ X/ S1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.2 B# e6 P4 `* a, a" |, }8 S
2. Mostly to clean the house. 0 ~2 Z; t9 ?+ Y* I+ T$ O
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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4 { c% P; @1 y: ~1 JHow did God make mothers?
1 J( _- E0 }( W( \- X5 e8 {1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
& Z2 b3 D1 v" l) S0 Z* e. T- h4 c2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
2 h1 h- ^# d# [8 z) S3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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) z" b% F4 _2 u) c0 ]- B/ ~What ingredients are mothers made of ? ' Q( K1 n, A1 {) g
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. 6 F& y" u+ E% h7 k# b
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. 8 T W* h3 x5 i) C6 q' e/ t
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
L3 @9 M3 L. U* E5 d" S- I1. We're related., A$ e/ A: L0 O- s0 A: W! T
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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9 P* P/ [9 v6 |8 F6 k h% kWhat kind of little girl was your mom? 3 n$ L8 B4 T5 X3 |! T% N4 b t
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. 2 N& P( j: w& W) i
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. 0 H8 B3 L0 c$ f! b; H
3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1 _) o/ s( L' t; l) S" h$ m1. His last name.) L/ f. F4 l; w3 M& n& s2 n
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
9 Y. o# D$ Q/ P& ]5 h0 Q) m3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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. T$ B4 a2 j) xWhy did your mom marry your dad?
, h5 R- v! i8 y4 i' u1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. 3 f; O! N% q+ U8 p
2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 5 B& t P3 _0 D
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. $ r# _9 Y/ p. J+ B
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Who's the boss at your house? : A' a% o5 p$ v( O5 ]4 r; M1 Q
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
9 b- S; q8 s {3 o- t( G2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
) r/ Q" ?5 u, a1 p2 n" @3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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6 B4 S5 J; z1 e/ g1 I9 e* D, IWhat's the difference between moms & dads?
* @: U m, |# g1 ? n* `: ?( V0 j1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. 3 P- W! ?5 U# d S+ c% O
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
0 K- X: Y5 `6 x% |3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
* e% L0 V w: e# q4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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% Y5 v1 K( b- c* [: [# EWhat does your mom do in her spare time? 5 @. m) o7 `+ a
1. Mothers don't do spare time.% A, n: O: G) k& ^2 l$ M/ W
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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What would it take to make your mom perfect?
0 T' d. U. k( f6 S+ d' y1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.9 }% V4 {" z6 E: t7 M
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. - |, B3 J+ E. G. k
; L) f4 z, r+ p% y5 E4 CIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
* q2 z6 R7 k' K* G+ D( m K1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
* O# y d# p( ]* b* h3 Y1 W2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.. d6 O/ L" s- L7 b0 f3 U* N
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. g. z( \! }3 B' S
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