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Why did God make mothers?. x' o0 O D- j) ]+ R& t/ Z1 p
`8 X2 u( l, G3 `" R1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
% Y$ O, b2 \( A$ ]% S9 ?" t: p2 x: [# \2. Mostly to clean the house. / I, q$ u0 V9 _, n9 F( h
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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9 T- s; R! ~9 t- m9 X! H# v% qHow did God make mothers? 2 @2 r5 z5 R8 e* O& ]- l) ~+ c6 o
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
# R/ p. f. o1 t9 c2 y7 {$ l2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
6 C0 e1 T& w" b" V3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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What ingredients are mothers made of ? 1 `- C7 y0 E. i4 x: U8 m4 ~
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
$ j, S1 s, \* z: U8 s8 R" T2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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) B; u( r6 w! y( K; Z, YWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom? 7 I3 @6 v w; [+ W1 n8 Y- z! m
1. We're related.# C7 o0 N; b ^7 n
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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0 l# {, s0 _0 K' z: q$ P6 ~What kind of little girl was your mom? 7 d7 Z6 R6 L1 G3 V2 K9 Q v8 G
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. - q1 l0 j" N: Q
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
9 K0 I* b. i; \, k# Y; l3. They say she used to be nice. 8 Y9 ]% K0 R6 H% I! l
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? |- \% K) [" n% T
1. His last name.- U# p8 X# j. y4 ^. x0 f( p8 z
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?/ s5 M2 n+ g+ Y3 R
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? 2 ]: X& x' ]' |7 D! w
9 S( p' L }/ l0 y, n7 y, H( PWhy did your mom marry your dad? ( Z7 q4 ^! C8 z1 a6 K# a( J
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. # l# U; h' _( }: h; g% {
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
. s4 H0 l( t( }3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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: e6 @/ c k9 HWho's the boss at your house?
% _) }0 x% K0 {. J1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. ) L( y8 N6 I0 m4 E
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.$ t% Q1 O$ y; K6 z" L
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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What's the difference between moms & dads? 0 i0 }3 ]3 k& \, ^
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
1 I v4 H/ x- z2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3 ]6 o* {9 g: r3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
( M: T, {6 c9 \% O. v4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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7 n, K8 S) P' ^/ IWhat does your mom do in her spare time? + T* o+ H# ?2 K! R/ V
1. Mothers don't do spare time.5 h- E# \/ V2 A8 B w3 U
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. 9 i& R5 ^+ y' J7 J, w2 [* D. J
6 ~' T6 R. I vWhat would it take to make your mom perfect? + ~7 _% E( @2 A3 G- g& p' T& @6 S
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.. s7 W d! G3 \& E( y3 ]: E
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. 7 q3 X/ T1 o' ^( t. f* d& W
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? " C# |2 t8 w) Y3 K
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 3 n4 d1 c2 P! x; F5 d, B8 d0 |
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.: W' {: ~" e C
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. , t$ T! b+ {9 L. X% C
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