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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA. y1 y+ C, y& U) d
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. 9 ?/ w9 z- O' y' P. q1 _
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
& r' P! y# T6 _4 n. {3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
9 T2 l0 e. S( ?, f; T4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA 2 \& |5 V" ]; b* w; S
7 C6 q- [2 Y+ o$ a; _2 |8 v1. Big rock between you and B.C. % ~, s0 S2 X' B: n! o
2. Ottawa who?
+ q/ }! n4 \9 p; L, @/ _3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
6 y: \3 n& Z$ d6 `7 P1 e) G- W4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
0 ~9 \; O. m* p: [' E8 M5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
+ G0 W, ~# e$ ^6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN . v3 M2 {7 i0 [. l; s
0 N0 f) r7 v# j1. You never run out of wheat. " x; L2 @: U" R4 A. ^6 N
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
% C7 t3 A0 q4 ?5 |3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
8 _5 L/ H- e0 X7 z$ k4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA - u7 l& a* e; ]
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
/ ]$ b( A+ O2 [- E2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. 7 G% Y0 p: w+ z' y
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. ) @' X! A/ ?) C# ^6 Y
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. : _ y: Z3 x% G0 e$ k* A) c# M; b; k E
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by. 1 v# V% t- {9 |6 U% |, T3 j( N k
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+ P- R% V; B& ]TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO ; o7 f6 Q% @+ ?1 a! _+ K4 v" U9 m$ K
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1. You live in the centre of the universe. . z: \8 n% R) Q+ g# Y7 }
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. " _ j% M4 N- X0 r: ~* }( \# B1 T
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
0 x5 U4 |$ U, m* o) \9 I! ~- K4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. $ n4 a, [7 `' y: A: P- u& P
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC ) F' k/ h$ C6 i, B
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1. Racism is socially acceptable ) L, a; j+ W3 _& P
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. 6 h$ K' [0 _ g. D2 k5 G9 g
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
- V7 |# F. `4 j0 B4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
' \+ {" B0 m7 J( tTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK 6 V5 a% d+ D4 d! v) ^: y
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK & x/ n- e% K Y" y" e; k
% m1 c6 t$ Y% i" `. d1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
) n* D$ L p6 |0 K( y N4 `9 ~1 Y2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. 1 R! l" C* t! l' e
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick . W" k% J, k& j% y/ R% M
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. + X' T# e! D( }; ?* C( z
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5 M# A3 w l2 d! o; \TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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7 z9 b' J/ N& k/ O( G b5 ]6 f5 O1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
5 Y% e7 b1 C& z( Q/ e: |2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. . [( G0 `& P1 a9 \ r& P* [7 G
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND + J$ G, ]6 T! `0 M/ M
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
* e+ R0 V$ f: R0 A& L" O0 j' O9 s2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. % z: m* R8 D: V
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. 8 Z1 `7 ]6 K7 l; @; V4 P
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
$ @* l. b( a* A% d+ |, k5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. 3 {7 `' }# z/ q
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. - R' @+ Y S2 X" s
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2 z7 J" s4 ~# E0 J$ u+ |TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND 4 ^% C% b# E1 h* c& \$ ~
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
$ x) ^0 X: i7 g( G9 W- n2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. " Z6 U+ C( ~1 N& L) E
3. The workday is about two hours long. " j; O7 `' E: O' {0 ~
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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