 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
* ]- {# u" f3 j0 {4 Y/ V请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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1 o% T% I8 ]& I9 Z0 A" l1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
0 L5 e$ `7 `) g) O1 Q1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it% a* h D# O% ^8 V; J, c
down.
3 }$ T& x0 @' T u5 Y) f; B' j# dWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about : ^2 M8 i% h) ~5 q. ^. d
you
4 v, y9 @1 D3 qleaving it down.
) K9 J( O2 }/ W7 j8 U8 Y1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？$ g" D2 k7 ^3 G5 S$ U8 {
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
3 g: c- {. T$ y% Q+ U- Z) s6 A- ZLet it be." p/ s( |7 R0 R3 @3 p/ T; J
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去. O. N: H3 U1 `) v! ]0 G' W
! c, o6 G: D; m. B( b1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it+ j e( X4 _3 G0 G
that way.
9 C. m) L% b% k; J2 S6 a' d1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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7 U0 A$ ?9 o! `0 i! g1. Crying is blackmail.
/ h( ?$ c) Y# C# D. `) U E1，哭泣是敲诈
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1. Ask for what you want.
) {' S5 [3 m9 p1 R7 y8 ELet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!) u+ O7 C! R9 V2 r: W f! ~
Strong hints do not work!! V2 {6 m5 k, J8 m& C
Obvious hints do not work!
- G* m6 ^0 B; \, TJust say it!
! D" l1 B' z' L6 P1，你想要什么就说
# N A' _, t: Q- ], V我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！( `* G) m0 l y$ Z; a
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every ; @5 X9 z% Y; } X$ G6 ~
question.
$ H' T! h F- `7 l' q1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意） ^, k; k8 I- S' p- u) i
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
! o$ a" c* f/ x* owhat we do.
6 F' Y6 M% z) o6 k& M6 w( j0 USympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
% c0 B% K# v3 y% m1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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4 X: j( I1 r4 q7 k+ w3 L( {! p1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.: X+ W' k/ w+ h: m6 c7 D
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去) [& H1 e* z% Y7 d o( w
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.6 Q( J2 w7 k2 @2 ]8 |
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.! X+ p7 y" u9 F4 l- R, g
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了3 i0 X) O5 f7 Z) y1 d" N- e
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us2 u4 z9 M( t% U. } n
to act like soap opera guys./ W9 r/ _5 Z& f# v! j
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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: w& H' C: B+ K9 X. A, a1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.1 q( i) E9 f9 m7 [$ _
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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2 ? }3 Y) k4 ?: C, q* H0 z1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways, e6 x- ^) l+ ]
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.) w5 l0 `( N/ f. D$ ]
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。- |3 o$ y4 u) p d- Y
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
; R2 a! S& b) y4 B' h( p9 R1 d1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
/ n: }/ m; W6 T! d/ A7 u5 Vdone. Not both.6 r) K) J$ l1 {) p$ F
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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5 ?- w* g. K* s# [, J; D1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
+ V0 D* K& Z- x! acommercials.$ I3 [7 F; | v0 U
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.3 A/ }6 o2 E$ a1 i" P* d7 ~ f( i0 n6 Z
" e5 E+ l. ?9 R! L, \1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
, r. l4 ~0 V! l2 T2 L' }- [4 }Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.- s/ R- r& ~4 v* D. t. }: O- O
We have no idea what mauve is.
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, B( L O x; t( U1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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) x9 @" a: {! Q9 p& w( K, }1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like9 p0 B. v' A4 l, ^. K p/ Z
nothing's wrong.
, f2 O( V6 S- b+ jWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.0 y% a$ R+ | z0 {
; K$ v3 F& h, D1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer4 n8 A1 g) S4 ]$ T
you don't want to hear.
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is( y* ^/ f" ~4 E& v( }1 B
fine...Really.! V2 r3 w( k/ j6 F, j) @
' n1 W" e5 a9 F* s1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
- P n. z! ~; R& N3 d: Vdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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* g9 M I _1 ]( h1. You have enough clothes.9 J0 T5 l; g i3 D8 W
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1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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}+ |. @' j5 B) c" V9 m1. Thank you for reading this.
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- ~: ?/ j" g$ q' d, C* }Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
$ d8 r4 P/ T) K2 HBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh./ p; v7 l; R' z; n5 c* ]( x
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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