 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
; a' @2 z8 D6 n) v9 A请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.8 c% J- B: A/ N( z% I
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
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We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
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; L Q2 j$ }! u7 r' c Cleaving it down.
6 r! C) R8 L1 J% ]9 \1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？ L7 H6 Z0 [" o0 D" V8 \( ]2 t& h
F/ N" R c8 E! t- O1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
) h5 o+ i" P9 Q) e7 B# BLet it be.
4 w* @$ X% ~- j! ^1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去& s- D% [ d& W; ?$ x
! [' d7 s* o6 X" X0 D; Z o1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it# Q. k) j) R+ ? J. y) c
that way.5 `% D' |, a. O# o. B
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.' C! [# O3 F3 B$ | ]) Y* \$ N5 v
1，哭泣是敲诈
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0 r9 E) s. n8 U1 R1. Ask for what you want.
' p1 l6 X% T! s, m B0 xLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!- A/ T: o6 r' I1 U0 ^9 H+ n
Strong hints do not work!
# i* x/ T. R- XObvious hints do not work!; U8 J" E8 n2 { b3 f' j! @
Just say it!
9 _9 }. S b" Z1 R- T: e4 @" Q7 M1，你想要什么就说& t, B% N0 q: Q$ R
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every 6 h# i) F% Z0 _, h/ u: i2 ^' n
question.# i ]- a) z" r. v/ ?# S& p0 Q
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）- O! u6 W% y: G. ~
" V* v; p1 m2 y1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's" A- u J5 R5 h+ b0 @
what we do.0 ^$ a7 N3 T% }! a
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
9 F) R e) h% b3 E9 K# H7 T1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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1 d+ k, S* s8 N6 E1 w% v1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
' f; O! D7 y" r+ u, s0 T- [- f1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.0 T/ C, \3 ?- T/ O Z
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
, K2 P3 X+ k, D! C9 e我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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' u. i7 p! D/ f! V% M1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
. |' D) l. E: ~; hto act like soap opera guys.) _' [( ^( n4 ^7 c
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们1 _1 b. X: `6 L! Z# F8 \
& I8 q+ ?4 @$ ?. w# r& F1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
8 p# |8 J3 E/ x. M# h1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways- V/ p+ ^ [ g \: \3 l
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.. G8 Y9 U# x& E% r4 r* l# @; U
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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5 j6 \& E* m( L; q% [: Y（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢） ^1 g: `5 q" Q6 o, A1 z9 m
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it$ U2 [" u7 I* j8 M/ B* F( c# U
done. Not both.
. F! c$ \5 |0 S8 ]+ M5 g0 ~4 eIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
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7 ]1 M( M6 s+ \' @- b5 ]* ]1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.) `8 T+ l6 j5 h- T: ~4 N7 D
2 K/ V& P2 j6 |" a5 h/ x1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.* H1 X5 Y9 `5 b. d% i( o) Y
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.5 t, T' D" x4 i$ H( Q; D
We have no idea what mauve is.2 f- s/ B6 {8 F$ o
. |+ R, n8 G( l% `/ D* {1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.0 L `6 l0 y5 {/ y* Z8 Q8 i) e
8 ^% R6 E3 h, _0 z1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
. c/ r* n; s {( S0 c/ D- ]nothing's wrong.
+ ~, b! t1 q L4 gWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer! I, o: P0 b, _/ q; v9 t
you don't want to hear.4 \+ H! I" T: Y7 r# [3 ~! I
, J7 R( u# E. k1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is7 f. W7 C$ m4 p* L. r- M
fine...Really.
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( e4 i R* G9 @( \1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to6 H. @1 \- s1 n& d# g
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.; M" g+ a; b. x
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1. You have enough clothes.+ D) \) G( R; q$ `, x
' {5 M/ o3 o" O/ S1. You have too many shoes.2 u/ d0 ]( j1 r% j* K1 B3 o
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!! [3 u9 Z2 @: r% c* `; ~7 H
" T: n1 C5 G( @: L1. Thank you for reading this.
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& A( Z6 V/ i X' @$ t( jYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;% t( N) P; \/ e3 r1 l/ z
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.7 P/ v, m+ M' A0 z
* N1 Y( B" k4 I0 K( s3 pPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
. G5 n7 Y L/ V/ V# j. BPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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