 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
0 ~! L& p3 y7 H/ B- f请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写; d) B2 V) z( N5 E9 }( A
/ D5 N) K* D: e1 T' m9 a8 M1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
. @: ^; U( b; r1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it3 z5 j. z5 h% W3 t
down.
8 H$ P' n* c% O2 LWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about " h* a! B# N/ J6 G
you
$ M5 O: [# @) kleaving it down.
3 _0 A+ j; i; X) m1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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. _5 r/ n5 K3 x# a. f3 p |- B8 d1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.. \5 r* a1 ~$ `9 w' I
Let it be.
+ a/ y; K! z/ O' |* J& i1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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0 y* }) W+ G9 L. }. W7 _3 U- w& I9 ^0 z1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
- I" v. u0 A x3 d% zthat way.
% n( @0 b- s7 ?+ @9 _/ j2 u& f1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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) l; `, x4 }9 k% i# a% S; i* L/ i1. Crying is blackmail.6 j: @8 q* w3 D% h% y
1，哭泣是敲诈
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1. Ask for what you want.( \5 ]9 S A0 A$ Z
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
% \( I X- N- a) \ u6 w: `Strong hints do not work!1 S( i6 C& X; S0 j% r7 `
Obvious hints do not work!' l+ t l* y# i9 f N
Just say it!2 j% c& d* |$ }" z
1，你想要什么就说
1 `) T/ Q( }1 R3 _我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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$ M/ c8 [& r- p) P1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every 7 e) M7 E2 Y2 Q% O
question.1 b3 m0 ^. X9 B
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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) g0 X$ t9 B; @3 Y' Y$ k" K; ?2 Z& P# C1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's! R5 I: P0 D9 @' T
what we do.! k1 Q3 a, z. ^1 t% [' Y
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.* {5 B# n8 \7 k: Y
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。 p; X# z2 E4 D f/ Y$ ^' ?! \- l
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
- T3 G& H) ]1 O% t0 S3 s5 f/ r1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去: f& q9 E0 c7 p1 V2 x
# {: G: n6 A% |* Y+ B8 F; F1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
+ S3 v7 {8 V8 |) A! |6 [0 n( P4 qIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.. s6 b/ ~1 r8 n' h* R' q$ s4 [2 T7 j3 ^
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了$ C, Z& @" c1 N) _$ K' `1 m
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
- N- j: Y! U ]/ Q( Bto act like soap opera guys.# p" D4 ?6 }! g3 K
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们% X% }3 a, ?7 w; h& G9 Y9 I1 C+ v/ z
5 Y) r5 G O) K0 ^( |1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
. E/ Y: \8 U" y: ^" z+ P. m1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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, V( v4 E7 e& Z% C7 T3 d1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways1 ]. J$ w: U& u/ E D, I
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one./ B$ N! A. w- J* Q( I* |8 g/ @
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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3 j% I j1 n9 }* S( x" E, N（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）' M4 _4 x- w) K. T1 N3 w: Z
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
8 R+ p. s% k) M* p3 Cdone. Not both.# e+ ~7 K- t( @$ q2 R
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during. L s" f8 R" e( w
commercials." I$ e, E6 q6 Y
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we./ E6 X a% o# `
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
7 J8 P0 M% o3 Q0 l2 v Y+ XPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
. R' T3 d4 r6 Z z) ~We have no idea what mauve is.
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0 s" ?9 [8 r# C+ f' S" z1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
, D a. I( ?1 ^4 @( m$ Qnothing's wrong.: e* {; O& w& x3 _0 Q
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer9 f& @6 [: s- [& j2 u, L, k
you don't want to hear.. [; [5 ^! b- L9 d$ M# d, a
C% F* r; I7 _5 v* P2 ]; c1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is& l2 ^% V2 c- k v% V
fine...Really.
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to6 l/ q3 R7 {8 K! M7 H( n$ X9 M
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.2 u3 H& Q* m8 ]6 h4 i8 o5 X
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1. You have too many shoes.9 @% [$ h2 m) _4 R9 o$ {
3 }7 [& j* l$ U6 a( y1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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( @' W( U9 G0 w+ A5 x, F1. Thank you for reading this.8 W ~7 {5 X4 F! I& G2 K
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
6 b8 _9 ? ]: oBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping./ Y3 y: y4 O9 X' ~% [# a, P; y9 ^
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.& ~$ T) `& f7 z( ?$ ]/ O5 ~2 \
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
