 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
|
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!- w/ {5 G5 v: D, }& ?
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写) ^3 U) j. N$ Z% T( q
; e _/ W- [+ }& C) \
1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
0 k0 A" C/ s9 c$ r( _1 w, F1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫5 q6 D& U0 u' w. M5 O- Z
' C1 U& f9 {/ l: N7 y- H- ^1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
- A& ]6 L8 i/ Z- _ t8 Y% L) Fdown.
: d' {1 L6 C/ x& e3 AWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
# e0 J- g) K4 {" ^3 m, X6 w/ G! Wyou9 q! c% W; U( s9 R
leaving it down.
. }, u/ S. v% S" [$ Z9 t1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
7 D! p1 _* M$ m) {8 g% a; g6 `" d* K9 _0 `" I
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides." V1 P4 v, E* Z/ \
Let it be.% ^& O/ F# o& L6 l0 G5 N( l
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去2 y8 n5 S# B0 c; E4 Y# ~4 d; s9 \
, m7 Z4 N, Q. R7 C' b
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it9 y1 ~5 b4 a! O4 c
that way.2 _2 X* C0 t+ T
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！1 D' s- \( ^6 c5 H5 X( U
0 R5 K0 D9 {+ a' R- x9 y1. Crying is blackmail.
; D! d8 {6 Y' ?/ P( j- Q1，哭泣是敲诈
* D& m2 Q% Q8 p' R* e" D+ W G) O. C9 m5 g
1. Ask for what you want.
" X# F9 o' U5 c9 L( b b5 bLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!+ j6 s Q2 K& T4 W- F6 }! Z: \
Strong hints do not work!
2 `: U/ p# C6 G2 N6 L `3 |Obvious hints do not work!3 l( l! F, k# C& c, y
Just say it!
, ~3 S$ @4 C8 ^# N x, ?9 x1，你想要什么就说: w7 c9 [5 b0 I5 Q7 ?! b' J; h
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
/ p) G. w% G* z/ L G. w( y6 p9 C" z0 T+ U0 t x
1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
& L. {' |9 ?" W N; o' }: Dquestion.# D! F; T2 E) K; L1 ?2 G7 C
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）& U9 M$ m0 ?* G
* O5 ]2 `1 R0 S6 p8 n# h1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
/ ~6 \. E! R: _what we do.$ @0 I) t3 K! U& r! s
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
! K( M5 _8 c, C: D1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。* K% ]+ j N( F$ X1 ~' e
; x5 \* i( Q: d7 q! E0 f: ~, B
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.+ a2 Z: z2 |- F# V! r( L9 h
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去 z, ^' R% c" l
- S% [- e0 y, O1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
3 f. Y2 i4 S1 x9 oIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days., q) @, M$ ]. `' C7 o
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了3 x$ ~9 Y" T1 o N$ X% F8 D
- M& m- @+ A2 h8 b$ K$ b
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
: m/ C7 ?+ w0 N! V& ] U- nto act like soap opera guys.) E: T) s. {5 _
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
( H" @& e8 o; O& t, c; X2 w
8 u8 R4 w% J/ _" \! C1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
! f o! v: G+ s) J1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
3 R0 p, \1 t( G' c, f- t; g- Q4 c t+ q+ @ R1 Y7 t% e
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
2 L% d! Z/ ]2 L5 emakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.) S0 c2 x6 ?) K4 I! A
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。& `3 q1 H9 N' ~6 e% ]! h& H
8 j9 D \9 O/ Q* `! z T
（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）" v4 V- o, `& d6 h5 X R
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it! C- { D4 |) E$ {% s
done. Not both.
) b2 _6 d0 F: a9 E" SIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.) e! p0 e- [1 t. q% v
6 f- d# E9 Y4 W: K
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during8 |- J5 K/ `* C4 ], ?6 ]
commercials.( [- E% p: @; e2 h
$ l8 S& d0 O6 @! H! ]+ l1 |
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.& g: `* N- a0 I1 z6 [& F
h* i8 v$ P r
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
7 d6 \) m+ Z, \+ Z- EPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
6 D; M9 \: |2 PWe have no idea what mauve is.
1 ?$ ~) y2 s: W
* M4 @: l4 p, v5 c7 ]1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.+ V) U/ r4 x3 N: @0 `$ ^' M& r0 I4 ]
: d( I& m$ j7 ~4 }8 P o1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
; O& W+ i+ F* n! C# ~5 Y# s5 Wnothing's wrong.
& Y0 f% v# N1 t g& v5 e9 HWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.' X2 Q0 Q: W- b( t, u' \+ Q9 X' g
0 C5 ]7 b+ F' S1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer# C# O# v& `5 r' g6 z5 _7 Q' f$ ]
you don't want to hear.
' z6 ]; U0 [0 V
7 v; F$ S1 W* K7 J& Y3 y1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is3 d* I; i! k+ ]0 D& c. m
fine...Really.2 Z) q+ {* V6 v2 f. `; o% L
) m# s( X2 f2 \% c2 l/ o1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to) I' b& K& ?2 Q6 A: s/ M
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.2 @% Q, o, g0 G$ W/ m
. u: m& i+ x6 y( _# V
1. You have enough clothes.
6 f* ~) J7 q- P, T' H& |2 r
; W! T- G8 S3 u$ }* f1. You have too many shoes. T5 h, Q& _1 v
$ a% a- C% B8 }5 ^: M) e0 i
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!+ r- u4 C/ R7 x$ ?5 ~1 _
- A4 l4 j# Z4 a- D2 O* z" v
1. Thank you for reading this.
9 E, l6 ~$ q8 w D) H
; S2 j# p; \' N9 t- A4 A1 g' E1 FYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;- ^# v% I( }2 l1 y- H7 [& N# d
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.9 M- \; x$ ?$ S' _+ m) k c& S9 g1 r
4 R- l) V8 D$ o" u4 j# t6 T" `
Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.; i: n* G, C$ ^, P
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
