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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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- }0 |) R5 D$ `/ W9 @+ b1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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. @" d! X+ [: v2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
4 d6 k% r; `/ q' K" ~0 ], Shour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
. P5 B2 k# N2 H* v' ymorning.) k2 V& j' `; g! s8 B
6 ~* g9 T8 `0 c" z3 S5 N5 Z' ^3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
4 p3 K* h H# Iyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a9 H8 r' Q X4 v8 [! S
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.* E# L* l" `" U6 W8 w/ F: Y3 s
# E, t7 t# ]* L" e4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its+ Y+ x+ b. O6 y7 t
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest5 G8 G; D, |. I* ]- ?- c8 G8 Q
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires d& p! y% }/ m6 c
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
. d. S) q/ p5 S( iphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
( J, y ? S7 l( h( o9 Scussed out, and possibly shot.; o L# d5 }/ g1 F& \0 n3 O% b
& z. w+ h. r/ U6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can) |6 Z7 H1 s! H% V" i2 L
get you shot.3 e! {, f4 P* Y: V V! R
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that$ n6 q9 r7 f* A, p4 o
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
* d6 m- o ^- f2 v0 Hthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot# i/ b6 e7 ~3 k$ c
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first5 X3 f& Y2 f; S" @* v" l
vehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
$ m' A1 V5 e0 j3 {) L+ zbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
0 ` v1 l2 G' x% I2 z4 Nday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
9 t& J E1 P* d6 P; Dmore construction starts everyday.9 w4 V& i* ^; S" i( O. D
7 B$ ?2 y* e/ G7 |7 a9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,# } `8 O" U+ o$ y" \
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,' s( u, [# N# v9 p+ S7 R+ a
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items./ d. z. u- k: k/ w( M1 i
( A% B. W& `. r7 Q' \2 T* @10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
" c) ~, ~" v _road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye* o1 q. V( q8 n( p$ y; S3 F
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and: A3 \7 I3 B4 p# Z* S7 A2 @% f2 p& J$ p
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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8 o1 P/ q9 X" s7 y# N11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the5 ^. N3 [" R8 {- v7 v2 S! i. L! b$ y
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
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: l. Z; [' H) v0 ]5 H* [6 c12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
7 i7 X' K2 S/ T% \" Y1 X/ ~- k9 yyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'! W# a6 T- k+ p" p+ X/ U
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.. e7 L. d% l. ]! _
! \* b0 r' P# j, ^; o/ r. E13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
5 f+ J" J4 e2 `% i% g) r7 {lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and6 `! h. ]! [* g5 h% ?
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
