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Tiger s Holiday Poem6 `6 ^9 H( i/ T5 ~1 U8 K( b( D
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Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house3 C. g u) U' B
Tiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.
7 } U) n' q2 o$ A6 ?She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,
5 `$ N8 }6 p/ t* Q9 h& [9 |. D9 ZCause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.
a! H/ z! G! r! g% [' wHe’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.1 C$ v& B0 a' F! t9 K" M
Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.
" Q0 r4 @4 r! @6 {He’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,) a. U/ M J" r1 r3 Z2 C
With Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.
8 H5 q( {4 D8 J0 z0 C# t* S' iFrom the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,. l \7 z ~ N. y& z" J" |5 n
Tiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.
( b- U( A1 f( s0 U7 T6 zWith hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,) A/ V* I \5 t0 c. Y/ f% v
When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.: H- }% h: a& o" p: H6 v9 O
Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',
* h. Q3 n8 X" ?; _! m) hTiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .
$ w! Z/ P. G- D$ t' Z( ZAnd I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade, c! k6 u. Y& ?: Z0 U U( A* ?9 [
"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."9 U% L% f4 \" U8 h
She’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,
$ S' l' \& |& @8 U5 C6 j8 vHer prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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