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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will0 e" I4 `7 p$ D% o( d
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was# v8 U, d* D$ t) L& o' a
the other possibility.$ O; n% S$ e4 P
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
9 r) M6 n% y3 S; |8 gspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in& w- g5 ], e: S1 O8 w4 ^' l
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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! \4 o& O1 Z$ k6 RIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make- e+ k! U8 ^ W
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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9 z2 n" W& l7 ~ A3 eThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up4 {' I! o; Q! A0 |5 J6 C
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter./ W: D" E( y" `$ l
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, w: A$ `- ^! }8 K
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
/ n& \7 X4 R! z6 n# |, Dtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like7 g; ~9 W7 f1 R9 P
fotograf 20% shorter.
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+ J+ u% ~# g/ s9 n/ e, l6 ?/ vIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
/ o; A- b! [$ C5 {& ^reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always) V6 B i7 q0 ^# q# C$ o; [
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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$ `2 L0 ]) B8 Y2 D3 y: k$ e6 {Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is+ I# ]: ^2 ~ A* L
disgrasful and it should go away.
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4 H8 `0 Z/ q5 j' @By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with8 o: L5 r# e# ^( g" G. } j1 N; {
"z" and "w" with "v".
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( \; R z P8 l& K) }1 PDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and8 D+ n) \2 O9 a3 D+ T( R
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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- d! D& O1 `! B. U# E! C! QZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu, j# p5 H2 M' a0 }! @4 m
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.! x5 a0 O, p+ U5 V
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze) [/ R7 u9 }& O$ Z5 H
forst plas. f/ `& X9 j; T7 D
6 k p5 \6 f# P3 q* L; h) x2 eIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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