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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
7 Q, p" O$ |4 ^0 pbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was6 b6 d Q6 c" Q" v% V6 ?( n3 L4 V1 R
the other possibility.) R4 X/ v( f" D3 v* }- @) y% c- G
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
' r. M% S: c4 A( G. x9 Q; B7 |3 Ispelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
: m, v' E8 I/ {plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".* s; M% y5 j0 z1 ?, ~" r, E" O4 C' y
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
# L( {& T2 z5 y' t9 H0 [the sivil servants jump with joy.5 }9 N* Q- F0 m9 I% P; g
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
7 r$ |3 F s {% Mkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.! A& |; e. c0 D7 L
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6 N$ p$ S0 k: AThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the( v- W5 ^3 ~7 A" U
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like' U8 Q t. c* Z1 x
fotograf 20% shorter.) R) U# j+ v( g. I! R6 j/ b: E
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to, T/ y+ o6 X5 N: M! Y1 @2 f. W6 z- X
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
1 `# ?) u: P" O' d/ \4 |ben a deterent to akurate speling.8 }8 p7 ]1 ^' {+ a I
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is& H, p, @$ j. c1 B
disgrasful and it should go away.5 [, m: h) i, |' ?& e- R2 v
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
( x7 X: K( {! x+ U! l: s"z" and "w" with "v".) e3 {# B9 }# f4 P
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
2 q/ D8 \0 M2 q2 n; y8 g1 ]; K- nafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
1 `8 @. X7 q5 X1 `9 ?, J8 S+ Runderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.6 q' L, j6 x5 j3 f- F
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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