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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will/ v2 O) Z1 @0 X9 G# Z& {
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was9 X4 P6 q, }" H: |2 r; L) x
the other possibility.% a' D5 \/ w+ B/ q# g8 c$ l% r
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English, l6 G& x; D w0 d
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in4 w- b& S. V; E% g
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".. }+ @5 M! [; c2 h( n
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make' w1 n+ o) c7 F
the sivil servants jump with joy.! C3 b$ `; o; } I4 r/ k3 r
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up( ?7 d) d9 R! ]4 L, J9 `
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
8 M# ^1 s0 Y0 stroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
2 M8 u0 w v: B! @fotograf 20% shorter.& b; V7 _* [4 H3 H
* ]0 F8 Q7 i7 ^) |In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
( N# {) D5 ~! S3 Z& z; Greach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. [1 a+ U$ B- E1 Y4 L% D
% ^3 [3 g! G. y' r3 _2 t% fGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
$ P% j; q- J& q+ |# I# Cben a deterent to akurate speling.# I6 e# y+ Y/ l" D3 ~# w3 x
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
, }7 _- \' O2 x- F9 Fdisgrasful and it should go away.
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* j) w2 ~6 \6 ^, {; O2 x. GBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with: b; H. A' ]" g/ i& v6 W- ]2 X! E
"z" and "w" with "v".( b' A1 X0 S& `: g
+ V' G4 W1 q' k5 p, QDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
$ k3 M2 { m" L6 {+ T: Dafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.7 b* u! q( L% ~9 p) [' F# |
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
V8 q K3 O" Punderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
0 Q" f% F* q" W5 d1 vUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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% @ s5 B- {4 h( }" }9 U) ~If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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