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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
" k ]5 @, ~! fbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
) A/ W8 U- s$ Y) Jthe other possibility.
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* N! s8 e6 F z3 E: @As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
& S t8 `! B( ?& [( Uspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in! {; D. t! R4 Q4 @# [; H1 h
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".2 F+ J& G p9 O$ L. [! d' }
/ q( i# p/ k/ G2 @5 F# |; YIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make* q7 Z9 {8 U4 H/ P, m7 Z' T
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
% ?8 @% B2 K$ O$ M) [0 O9 mkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the- [' K4 l# x1 E; Y0 d
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
& J, G. j; P' F6 @% c; m( @fotograf 20% shorter.
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* i+ _0 D5 q! k0 S# S8 Q5 B3 a6 Z, tIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to4 C1 c3 Y- N; l) I2 E
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.2 d9 l& x3 W8 M0 o
' G) s3 L* F: p8 B3 AGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always2 q3 n# ]* D; g
ben a deterent to akurate speling.$ o( r" D1 N z9 y5 }; T, r
2 m9 s4 A/ P+ q" M, z% d. gAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is2 b" w& E7 m$ l
disgrasful and it should go away./ M( M; x, k* P4 l' ~
" c( ^4 K) I t3 H5 ~By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with3 x% D9 R5 E5 t* T. f [
"z" and "w" with "v".. P# q9 ]- M2 o8 M9 k
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and3 w9 _$ c3 P' O W; _
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.: H2 i4 d* e0 z+ D( H( T$ i
: y1 ~- M7 ^2 t! xZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu& G2 Q' @9 V6 l2 s1 \; C( X& C# w
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
" l u$ z, u, F* p9 @/ N3 e C! JUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze K2 R+ c8 G8 ]4 U5 ~$ M- X% c
forst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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