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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will- e' L0 M9 w! A# W! W( T$ J
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was7 V' \) ?2 i: v+ I; a8 u
the other possibility.( r- a2 N/ i/ d
3 i- x P9 ]9 j9 A6 \9 hAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
+ _0 f0 Z! i' _* Ispelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in" f7 P$ O7 ~9 I3 y* l6 p
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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3 ?9 M% m4 u. n- d1 M! dIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make0 _8 q8 h' E; W6 l
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up: J0 e* o, d0 d6 N0 @1 }0 D/ P; s
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
?) z, U' G& y" ?/ Vtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like" h8 s8 v" q$ i+ [6 ]6 S
fotograf 20% shorter.
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* ^" k6 s8 }% ^In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
2 }( u9 g/ Q3 _; u9 G# A4 N& dreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.1 V7 q5 x+ J/ e+ n
g4 s8 f" h; ]* {5 d: ZGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always2 B+ U' f& S. ^$ C+ m
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
: Z3 o4 |6 K" I# M. qdisgrasful and it should go away.
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5 @8 C4 }7 ^2 y" b" _, VBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with, t+ }9 N3 n9 J6 j3 e( q
"z" and "w" with "v".
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H) ]/ x/ y; lDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and, j5 ^: B( v1 ^* B: q$ \" l' I
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.9 ^0 P5 G" {% }9 J
# ~( F# O9 U. J& k/ J/ s, s* }Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu! A: e' f+ n0 F; [3 E4 D L
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.1 E+ e9 K/ E+ i
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
0 S' M5 \: v& ^% R0 [& B* Xforst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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