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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will( [. ?. w$ R! I
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
& E/ k0 Q( w: R. U& Rthe other possibility.5 G, y* ~& b( e$ u, W( E) J+ I; Y
+ z& X# d9 M7 R. i0 j0 A1 fAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English ^# g \3 G- o: S+ [. ^
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in0 g" [. p; I! ]" ]2 h2 g
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
& t3 V1 [( u8 @! @the sivil servants jump with joy.* B1 F* q2 Z( C) p* V1 r
( s. T8 b* m1 z0 F; TThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up& h. `2 ]5 z/ G# o8 F& t
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
! M% m4 K! Y; V1 d u/ C7 D* d2 Ptroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like+ }7 l; f |( A% @- w/ @; @ ~: l7 W
fotograf 20% shorter.
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% @, B8 J1 {1 w+ LIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
9 V B0 I3 y) X4 Q% J" oreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.1 {6 q& @, w% f. C/ L* O6 z7 p
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always. m& L4 j- a# k6 V9 ?" j) D
ben a deterent to akurate speling.; L3 r7 [9 N/ X+ _$ B
6 Y5 y0 W% \& n1 cAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is( I* m' s& S |- z' M6 L+ R
disgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
% A0 ]: D4 ~7 ~, N/ x# H"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and! P! \/ {/ k9 ~$ N" t/ K' t/ r
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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- R% J) w; {" nZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu4 b, ~' y: ~8 b' e4 O
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.' {( @( s' Y! k; h
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
6 W8 N! S3 Q) a8 Xforst plas.
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: G6 g. t! {/ f# cIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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