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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
4 k t4 F) j1 K- s+ u! z9 Jbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was' d. W! I: K" o" e( b6 I' M
the other possibility.0 y* G: q' t7 j8 X7 m
/ G* ?9 X+ a3 h/ z% ]As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English& p( l8 D( Y4 V' N3 r+ Y4 p; G% t
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in) U2 ]2 L7 t4 U! T: X/ ^ {- Z
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
1 M& o8 A' R" u! h8 C0 Othe sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
: }* n9 S3 d# C- W9 Ykonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter., k1 `7 p2 m! k
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the9 ^" S! l- d+ c6 \' Z( D2 `
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like7 a( Z& Y% S# h/ }/ a
fotograf 20% shorter.
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' {) r' l4 g1 J: Q9 y% y( s- tIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
2 g% F; _3 z. b; V. F- xreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
4 [0 C" M1 T6 p- @ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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~8 {4 U& P9 o5 TAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
. ]8 ?3 \% r; z" o) x: Q- hdisgrasful and it should go away.
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8 h a$ ?" Z+ k& l" ]! ~; eBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
& E n: H( _ j T( F% B- \"z" and "w" with "v".1 m/ B# ?9 J: e2 L! u# l
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and% }- G4 c! b' A* W
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.5 E5 q2 w5 X$ W1 T4 ~- b4 E
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
' @! W6 d$ z8 n, w/ u; aunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
5 M+ A! r. O& }$ b! X \5 L4 LUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
$ j3 ?7 p, V+ n: A: Pforst plas.
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$ M2 w6 i4 y- Z; AIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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