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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will' p7 p5 C% D5 r& @
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
1 T; c4 r* J/ V/ ]8 U" e6 dthe other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English- M N# l& v3 V2 F$ ^$ j
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
6 s1 X9 ]$ [* U5 _6 i1 cplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".1 m! n E- N: ?1 A! Q
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make5 ?4 h+ V. [8 ?2 e+ G) ^8 V3 B+ a2 t
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
. [; n- H& \9 Q$ D1 d4 Y* |- jkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
# h" D# S" h+ Ytroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
+ Z* Q: {; `+ j2 s+ m2 pfotograf 20% shorter.) j( T; ?" N7 {/ u/ _6 ~
' I3 X4 _$ R* s! W T7 v, D0 QIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
! ]0 D" R8 t, c6 G* Yreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.1 A+ C9 p+ a ?1 f+ n1 N3 Q
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always% U4 p3 I" D- E0 u& d
ben a deterent to akurate speling.- G, s0 i* d8 o( E. ]: C
) G1 N$ ?/ M, Z8 K) M: x* |Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is6 O: g9 ~8 b$ I$ r* U
disgrasful and it should go away.
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4 u4 W2 a* p/ y5 I7 D+ |6 UBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
7 o. O8 F) Z4 j" C. e9 d2 ~"z" and "w" with "v".5 u5 h- y6 w0 k; j$ ]$ _+ r. `
: p$ o6 [, G* y4 G4 }9 FDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and; H" G% a; B8 }9 O2 W: F
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu9 r! P, Y H6 ^1 ]2 {
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
" q; r1 E6 s5 f/ L. A: aUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
7 G; ?; C |& H! d" qforst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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