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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will+ S5 x( v% A8 Y2 K
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
$ @1 {/ f" H K' T# _7 \the other possibility.
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; B$ F9 G- W; WAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English. e4 ~. u9 W( ]0 ?1 G( M( }
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in9 o" C8 w6 R! ]" H& W. g+ v! R. f6 a
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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- H h/ e/ [8 ]% }6 I3 BIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make9 D* @5 L/ N5 N- A
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
# D, T: |$ C& ?$ o3 ^konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.# _- P& _* @# b' r' h
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, A* g. X' B' S- Q8 R T i+ ^There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the# R! m8 X0 I0 L8 G+ v6 I, e8 j. m
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like: D$ t$ p8 `# z3 ?0 ?
fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to) Z* @3 S- X) f! t( I/ g
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.5 |# { x( n) B
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
" c5 I% ~4 P; I- _! `ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is) ^" t3 G( [: [' s
disgrasful and it should go away./ ?: o) q7 Y) | d: {+ `
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with4 ^2 `- ~# a7 ~( k" W
"z" and "w" with "v".
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6 b1 u+ Q6 y! s9 @9 J) \During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
) C3 |8 {" R+ p, \' s: o- zafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
: a6 h" H3 M: \: K% [4 L% Yunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru." i. F9 L6 z+ [* O; l; H8 Z
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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