 鲜花( 0)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will! S; L' | t9 z) _
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was) W$ V, F3 |7 u; x( B9 s
the other possibility.
T! Y1 A9 o$ U: i/ U3 k
8 b1 }8 J/ M: w7 j9 lAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English( E' Q) U! ]" D3 O1 I! ?
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
" H% n/ O. H+ d' d+ ?plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".% V/ ?5 L9 b" z$ B
9 Y" ~ |. q# t& c7 Q9 J9 dIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
4 ]+ \- H) `& L% B' H, S+ pthe sivil servants jump with joy.
9 P3 f& S8 Q, u. {9 v- z: o2 n$ E {% y7 {) M( Y1 S1 P
The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up( \0 C& W/ o4 w$ o
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
! A ^1 i) Y2 }( {# E. Y, f8 ~3 ?+ j9 h/ ~7 ~9 H5 E
9 f; A, o5 F$ w/ x/ \$ H+ VThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the2 B& C. S; U3 f( O
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like0 q$ B5 \4 {& [3 ^3 F( L
fotograf 20% shorter.
" D+ W( J* M* y; u" {' g- k# H
. O/ A3 O9 [; eIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to3 m+ c* A1 s( A9 K( G$ i
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.6 T& F) S- P( d. P
r; N# v* I! GGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always* N: @5 L3 g" y. A
ben a deterent to akurate speling.3 h% v+ ~6 l9 b1 m+ o, N
' f- I3 t7 I" ~5 f3 k+ Y
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
. Y5 B3 F! |' F# m% u- U$ q3 M% tdisgrasful and it should go away.
3 \" w; T- Z3 T+ N y3 M: e) a% H, l F9 }
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
$ i9 q: J9 ]6 E6 u& S- m9 h5 a0 Z"z" and "w" with "v".1 f9 ?8 b$ T/ Z) X$ l0 C
' X0 C7 `+ R: ^During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and k1 j) k. d' l' K( y! ]0 I
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.5 I1 R: {$ f. Q# W' I
6 R, W' P4 o9 e9 A3 [
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu2 }- X7 d+ j9 V1 ^+ K# l
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
! O7 u8 [7 N; r$ d( iUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze, \6 ~! {4 j$ ~ M, {- z% S9 C1 p2 L5 F
forst plas.6 G$ @! i; @) l! q/ P3 e
* z( Y5 V9 y/ h: ?
If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
|