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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will5 I: O! U7 W1 y4 f' A" w
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was1 y3 S. ]' \% W7 w
the other possibility.! H/ m7 L7 b" o% T
3 M1 ^* g5 U, {) z# WAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
: w$ K4 v; ]7 |% ?2 Wspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in" j- l/ e2 r ?/ p( t
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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$ p6 ?. K% v3 r6 P; e4 [In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make% U& z# f# o/ ^1 @& g
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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$ b& s) w% u6 L( i1 k9 SThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
; I: g8 P' u& Vkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.) C: a9 W5 o- n+ U
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the# Q/ l" u1 r! E
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like; R& v+ O9 L0 R- ]# ?8 H
fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to" M5 j* Q ]- }, e( f6 O/ J
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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2 ], o3 y& X$ [0 P0 O1 tGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always2 ]" V6 V) w' P6 b& Q3 l
ben a deterent to akurate speling.( y2 K1 @1 e" ~3 c
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is. Q- f2 d% ^. T" p @; t# ^
disgrasful and it should go away.
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0 H5 l( @" e: |5 oBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
$ t+ Q" L1 P& j) Y& ]"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and @ R2 L6 P9 s& |1 T8 |
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.& N8 @" y! h7 K$ X
6 |* J% C7 f; m z8 n! f" [5 JZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
- ]+ k' a. G( P' |& u. c; Funderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.& H- w( N3 i( Y4 Q( S# I- g
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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