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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
4 D5 t7 T* R0 K( w0 w9 R0 Fbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
0 q0 M* l& I4 D5 Qthe other possibility. u* s6 S( A& ]* ^: a
1 ^* `2 ]5 M0 a9 {4 M0 wAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
8 E5 d2 z0 W( M. m' E; @spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
0 A) Z& \9 p# ^plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
" x: c h& N5 Y+ Q4 K' Q- Dthe sivil servants jump with joy.
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* g B6 }* y% k- x2 hThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
+ f% L2 V; _) R- ~5 wkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.: T- L$ D% K( D9 a1 A/ ?
+ \& V; l* E$ v! z
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
: x, }3 b4 B* O% a7 s) h8 Stroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like* |3 t5 A( D: U4 |) g% ?
fotograf 20% shorter.
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% F, x9 `( X) t* y$ G! [$ f# v( YIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
) n8 {% [9 @/ M+ ]$ {) W! B) jreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible., I$ R- {" f2 Z5 N- z9 E
: J% e7 g2 s( h2 ?4 kGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
F# u9 j4 n3 x u' h0 nben a deterent to akurate speling.
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; }% Z4 `' }' a4 t( MAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
; R! W3 t0 x. o# m/ x7 v0 idisgrasful and it should go away.
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! j* c6 {9 K# W$ i% OBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with# M4 {" q# v( g4 u8 B6 w, B
"z" and "w" with "v".4 ~: e6 ^+ y8 ]
, f& Z2 D+ J0 T1 N/ TDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
, s, x0 W7 R5 D3 N+ [% x. O: G# kafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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( ~" u I. s& E/ R/ O0 |! yZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
/ L7 v9 B* a9 o3 W! @; M' }, W5 `understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru." N6 Y' r2 ^( h. Y0 ?+ |
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze0 G7 s* S% G/ v) Z, a& s) K
forst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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