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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
7 K8 w4 E5 t: D7 q( y( k2 K. Obe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was. }, Z" R) R6 N3 m
the other possibility.
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- v- J6 F% j+ r; KAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English9 Y9 g) r' H! G7 k
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
9 l" X' E* w9 [/ gplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
# U& B. n( L1 _' n; s7 Ithe sivil servants jump with joy.
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4 Y, k3 {5 P6 T3 Y5 yThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up5 e; ^/ w# g- E; i, `/ C0 X
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
, ^$ e9 w7 Z( i; r/ e3 g6 y+ ctroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like7 o4 }" V2 g5 z+ h- Z
fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to1 v, b8 L' ?6 {/ m; K
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always" p# C, w& `4 [! J! j/ S% l
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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& N2 n- U+ w: r4 NAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is' I6 c1 W1 l+ v h! F
disgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with0 I& ~9 b: K2 I# {7 w
"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
0 q! J0 b9 q9 `1 b8 W* n$ d( cafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.; {3 |- n5 q7 v7 M5 p6 f( n
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu) ^) G8 S3 a" c# M
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
) Y g% g- Z/ R. ^Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
$ r, |$ h9 G5 L% d& W lforst plas.! b. `/ ]: f2 Y1 V f: e
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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