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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will8 U( {+ c+ b% ?7 Y0 R" S
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
1 K% w: w' V, F4 s5 ]2 Vthe other possibility.8 X( j! U, E/ h' c# Q
K6 Q$ c3 U0 r& f& uAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English* Z3 t% f5 F% b" d
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in. R( x, n* `: v
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
) _' O3 K' b2 [, G" Y1 ethe sivil servants jump with joy.* _. p2 K. B% W) J
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
6 `+ V1 u: q0 N/ X2 R* lkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the, U. w; ~8 {1 C: J* K& Q. V
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like- L. u6 e* R$ Q8 y, Y% p: ^
fotograf 20% shorter.; v( ]4 S4 r$ n. l3 y6 n$ b; n" T
& S8 p, N: i9 ~; C6 JIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
! J$ e& E6 {+ D$ R, Qreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible." C0 q" H+ |; H, ]% t- G
' p5 N8 S& R( X& RGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always9 C9 y# H, D* x. Y9 _7 F
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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$ x) k, k# T0 `/ `/ u0 GAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
, |# x0 j4 X( Z. p% u9 udisgrasful and it should go away.3 w" ]5 y3 E+ o$ i. J- i, S
6 h' ]& U% |) YBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with4 ~- V* |7 M- g4 y5 O# b
"z" and "w" with "v".; z0 ~$ E' D+ {
9 ]2 J/ Q' A) Y) F/ e9 E" UDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
6 l' }4 ]6 V6 H) uafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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' A& n- h p6 r w$ `0 p' {& JZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
- \7 Y$ @, t, qunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.8 \) X- H# b( c3 B9 w% X
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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: z3 H7 z7 g2 e' m; e: V, [* n4 ]If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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