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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will9 g/ J+ l& e: L2 |$ \
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
: E! ^" v# p H) T0 m1 |( ]" P& zthe other possibility.( v" `$ |+ [$ A) L5 ]& H3 R+ U
/ M6 F3 m4 }' X* G0 P2 {As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English5 P: v0 \+ o+ r( `* v$ }7 F1 z
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in0 M* a/ D1 s0 @ {
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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$ W4 b8 j' r# \; TIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make" i9 [- d8 M0 _
the sivil servants jump with joy.: D7 `' q0 b9 q2 Z7 \
0 E- A4 N' V" s0 s$ nThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up( q8 n, \( O3 J1 A, G( L
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.2 |# p1 p0 f) X. K
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
3 @: m" x: f$ {4 \/ e: Ztroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like9 L' w* u( [1 o, A" Y8 _
fotograf 20% shorter.: j5 d! O9 K- y) \( L
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
$ q( x' a$ f: Qreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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$ N( h7 b0 b( k( o, x% z oGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always6 c0 }/ r) ^2 o A7 J$ W% S4 t
ben a deterent to akurate speling., @# b2 P: g' o2 K( P
/ h G' I+ h7 u% x1 mAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is9 e& e5 s9 g- g [
disgrasful and it should go away." e' d& e: q$ ]" R
' h; u, |# H: v, T, f
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
. R0 K( y9 _% @4 M* ^2 z k"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and# m! u# n, b3 {$ v
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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) z/ B. ~& G& D- aZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
3 a4 f( ]" f5 \4 X/ Z' Dunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.! J3 W) c0 k' D Y1 j/ Y7 U, l
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze n! i6 b" M7 n) R1 w
forst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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