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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
7 Q l! ^7 B- w3 G8 e* p" bbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
- h- e* p! O1 d6 ^: \the other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
" b% I7 F1 X( M1 P |spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
4 x8 O: I5 T4 t bplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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- [" k3 \7 H3 iIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make* G& Y) X8 i: |
the sivil servants jump with joy.2 i1 n' L+ p# F: }" |( W3 _. ?
1 z0 g, J& |$ u+ yThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
, f% {6 M+ q, {konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the! s/ z2 ]) F; x
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like0 |6 ~+ _0 I9 f- V* C7 n; r
fotograf 20% shorter.
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6 {+ x/ s5 x# A9 q6 {9 i) }In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
, S8 _' Z b' m6 \1 W0 }% ^7 Treach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.# R7 G0 t- S- c, l% W
2 X$ M# J1 r2 t" n! i2 W2 O' oGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
$ ]6 f r/ B9 @! f/ O8 v3 L" `ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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- {7 s" r) Q( O2 JAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
* O0 V Q) }* N$ V" d- _/ ydisgrasful and it should go away.& a1 }% y& i% e2 M
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
5 ? j4 J. h! H8 O: I$ |) E"z" and "w" with "v".: H8 ]4 ]6 u. [* r+ r
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
& q3 E* L' Z/ e Bafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
( D" g: e: j4 v/ v) Iunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
0 l' B( [( x# g3 l# zUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze8 N- i4 w4 a. Z! L. q6 f6 z( d
forst plas.
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! z* f8 a5 s2 `' F t, {) C1 O, EIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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