 鲜花( 0)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
3 r- n/ `/ `: f) R9 b% Ybe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was! k$ S9 c& ]' Z$ q
the other possibility.
( {' z7 C9 Q5 P
$ H' G3 ^( i: e# K3 \As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
0 C' ^% o c9 @# W8 n9 Yspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in( r0 f4 Q+ r9 U( T6 y) M) O r
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
- D, m; y# I& Q, r6 P
% `- K% c4 |: w7 Z0 @' f5 P9 aIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make1 ^- B% C9 E8 K' Z* o3 {
the sivil servants jump with joy.
1 O3 R+ ?; N" O7 ?9 r4 ~9 p) G! M v# M- y( Q
The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
) O9 w/ b! w- [1 _- X5 A, f+ tkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.1 v$ |5 Q: x; y( y1 c
! e- f0 Y" J1 K# T0 y1 h
A6 Q4 ], S' L @% o; S3 o- P, OThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
' ]3 P' G1 m5 z \+ P" ?, Btroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
% ~0 Z' R' b5 S; Y5 \$ v/ Y1 Hfotograf 20% shorter.
( d5 X$ q, c4 k, z0 `) O- t, Y
0 I1 _. N. A" |, FIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to, O1 }+ l) z1 f" t, m7 A, V# W
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
6 p6 b$ W' `8 Z L
6 g- N( L) [( J0 n' sGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
3 Z, v5 g( L9 z" q+ ` _6 tben a deterent to akurate speling.# _" v/ w% G6 g& Z: g% O
) z& k9 m& ^) ]8 e* r3 ?$ SAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is2 z0 h3 X7 `6 ?/ ]
disgrasful and it should go away.
5 W, }0 p8 H1 ~$ L4 h: Y u; [' p# y
, `* E' \8 ]$ mBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
0 m k4 d/ C: i- Q2 R( z"z" and "w" with "v".
# e! i( M |: n% z- U5 O$ d4 f5 A! m# X7 W- q
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and; o$ A& R+ w0 P+ ^7 P ~, l
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
! H; O3 \/ u# {' ~0 b# a) n1 p. } u9 {8 v& Z$ ?
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu7 v0 M; x2 {* N/ p, ?
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.* h' o. m2 F7 Q0 G7 q
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze9 i7 Y' t5 m0 @3 M* f$ U+ H
forst plas.% y: T/ K$ k6 {' F* h7 ^
! R6 _8 f, m; b! t6 @# qIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
|