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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will0 Y# c# c Z6 D# i' _- [. ]: {1 M
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
/ W: N o2 P6 x' nthe other possibility.( K7 v1 \6 @- @5 U y! F# y
: ?. B* R: ~& E4 f5 aAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English" a: T+ O7 A) }( `5 Q0 h& K* {
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
& \& i7 x4 m) aplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".) H( \$ o1 M$ S
# o I, T( l* ?( P8 rIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make7 I2 U! H! D) K: I( t8 l1 i
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up8 s; m- \9 {" o% \# p' D, V6 X" p
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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* e* h2 ]8 }& \There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
: C$ I8 ]1 p% ~ b) Y0 stroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like7 r5 |/ b- \. S ~9 F$ U$ b' P
fotograf 20% shorter.
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/ H+ S6 h9 V" OIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
: T" e$ _, c) o" q& d; r$ _; _reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
, q! O) A& z6 Eben a deterent to akurate speling.
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: d+ o5 \# ^ F8 r, Z, AAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
; j, B# X1 M+ Cdisgrasful and it should go away.
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) W, Q2 N2 t g1 GBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
2 P4 V7 D3 K4 ?% Y0 k"z" and "w" with "v".5 f7 L) o2 W6 \- _+ E
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
, f. k+ h6 Z" T* o' }# aafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu# j5 M! h A: D
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.3 e& c- \8 u: y6 ~ g
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze# @1 d, S: {2 v) E5 K/ R# M" i5 P
forst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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