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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will8 X5 l) u* H: `6 x
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was, P( l3 o$ N$ p4 O$ x
the other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English+ h& Y& n) N0 }: Z# |, M; g
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
5 H% |7 _6 T- Fplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
8 T; u3 {9 ]* C' L7 T/ tthe sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up. e3 B) I# |" ]" q
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.* ~4 |% F/ L) @3 P6 R3 h
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3 p7 F( O0 z8 C6 R2 ]0 v, N. nThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the& j. M x, g" E& m; f
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
0 A( D% P8 M6 rfotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
2 A& i3 V+ G$ X( `) vreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
, R# ?9 ?5 J7 \$ |, Tben a deterent to akurate speling.
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% W# [/ R* D1 q3 A/ L; u6 X. UAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is+ d# w" _! [9 N6 Y+ k
disgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
3 _4 b* T7 ?/ d, H: O Bafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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& L, U. b% L7 V8 [& d/ xZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu! u) ` G) {8 C8 b9 r- k
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.2 h$ J3 H7 l" p- e) D
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze: G: _5 K5 V, V- [. P, U
forst plas.
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: p6 g' R& q6 ]& z6 h- c: U: g) {If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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