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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will9 n) @/ ^! a/ d/ A
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
- s: q$ n# a$ T# \2 S$ x, othe other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
# n! O* Q% d& \1 k, cspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
, r' P P4 g! ]( xplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".( r, f$ r# V* W: S# X: T$ d$ U
& ], O5 B0 V, JIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
5 P- L5 h+ T& k, a4 x' P7 r- Q/ ~the sivil servants jump with joy.( S8 ?- ^3 W$ P5 |9 t, z
) \+ Y% s0 N+ IThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up, k% b) E- b; x
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.* F y; S, ?( g2 j8 c2 l, e
9 {- e. l+ l+ V; P6 B: V
, y A, l- j; [ w) P
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
7 `* i6 ^ G+ W# @3 T9 V6 Wtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
/ r( P* G) i4 ~fotograf 20% shorter.
. P- A5 c; ^! _) u3 r! g! Q5 S. I% M& x* f/ }9 ]
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to* k2 P b5 J1 @8 J& P
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.) x! C7 U2 ?- H! z, b5 Q
& |' V% @+ A8 [1 g7 s5 A+ {Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always, r+ d% F( m9 n B) S% M: F
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
I; Y3 n8 Y. K+ W3 H* X8 g( H h: u c
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
) e/ m2 d$ z% F2 L! P" r9 cdisgrasful and it should go away.
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. K! g$ I# F" R0 M) EBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
/ \6 i, C' ^* G ?"z" and "w" with "v".8 F! ~) v& P. C, z6 @$ Y9 t0 r T
0 w3 Y+ h# e) E7 `0 f
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
6 F5 g8 z5 @$ a; _/ Wafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.( k8 I- O8 V7 i9 l0 q% q _
7 X6 ~7 M/ b# H9 e$ R, {# Y+ _: sZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu7 ^7 b+ o5 g8 M5 u, B: d. H
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru./ P7 k) R4 \# [6 S7 B) G# K- t% l
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
2 @1 o' t. m0 V. B* m7 l" U3 wforst plas.
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7 G8 g% _9 \4 ]( R8 Z2 IIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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