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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
( p1 R- n+ h( B1 L% M8 G6 }5 O2 bbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
) J" k. t% F$ y% M* J3 A: mthe other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
" y. Y! O) L) Kspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
( x, R+ e1 Y4 ~6 [plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make0 z, i _0 F$ N" H
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
8 x' @" Q" H) ?' v' Xkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.2 o; Y _* Z: m
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the, F6 t/ u C$ w9 f2 I" Y/ \
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
4 ~0 j/ D3 |/ l$ c* t& E% _$ |fotograf 20% shorter.9 Q7 B; b3 J6 t# y' B, p) _
* D4 a& a' ]: R+ aIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to3 G) E5 c5 ^: P! A) \, O
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
1 I; R, _: J9 R1 O+ r! Wben a deterent to akurate speling.
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, ?# d6 Z$ I4 d# _Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
6 ~* f1 }7 v: {, V& mdisgrasful and it should go away.
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6 ?7 ]8 P$ J/ a* ZBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with' w% T5 v9 x% P4 Z4 x: H. X) `
"z" and "w" with "v".
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* X" K3 z$ l7 x! J8 O( n8 UDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
$ M" n- h1 n/ G$ Xafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.1 F, Q! u l5 z: V2 ^. U
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu. {# ]' S4 Y: e$ P
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru." x* }- b' j( g+ A- y) p& x
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze6 p, k( [( c5 Y/ o$ M1 }, f
forst plas.
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! t, O- o3 O9 j* m4 x4 T% }5 WIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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