 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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4 A1 {6 R: H9 o V4 K( ?4 C' C( nI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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1 L4 u1 G. c$ |( II was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?0 k; ?5 y, d4 n& X. ~+ l/ A' E
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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E7 s9 K, Z2 S7 e# S* t0 a' FI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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7 ^6 q- M/ Q+ N- Q& B0 ^& c- `"What is Roe vs. Wade?"* J$ E5 w. |, o' n) T
# t3 d$ t! N' ] V" S- ]I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?% z+ W# N& x7 e% E2 ?% p
% B' |3 p. I! r- ?1 x; uI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."& a/ U" g! e& k
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"0 V: L2 K: u* x V( l C
: J+ Y% S3 ^1 {8 h6 C* M9 GNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”* |- P8 y1 Y" R; Q
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.9 |0 j2 k9 g' Y+ {4 G
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Thank you very much!3 W: k3 f2 j: @: M5 K& |9 X
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:8 i$ x$ p9 Y* V6 a/ ~( u
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.$ `/ Z W7 W) o( l
4 a1 }! [$ l2 U: U% l9 [: _"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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7 J0 L) U& N/ z6 F' nRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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