 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.. m& B- Y) V# t4 b
: f: D- C/ c" ^I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.; C/ z, f3 ^) _7 _; j/ A' |
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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) a D( W+ a$ g0 w1 s) eI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:' k' z* S! W, Z# _
" f2 |% T1 b. c3 R$ R$ m2 |! w"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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# {5 N! `0 y2 Q* B! K. l$ VI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?& L8 I% \4 U5 Y! Y; ? t( e* ^
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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2 n k$ M( Y& ]3 E- ^; @" QI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?6 S2 U2 q8 w" l5 o( g
3 D$ G; P2 q. R8 X$ j, C"What is Roe vs. Wade?"# N( h3 p9 Y# z. F
4 \; R4 p7 k4 Z G' [, S( GI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?; `% G- u9 c, ]0 l# m6 l
% H6 M9 N* e& V6 Q; G vI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!7 m3 |3 n; L' f. C
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”* E1 ]3 x0 D; A! ?2 ?. g% P( |/ w/ Q
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!% l; _! U5 \# R
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0 L& t) M4 Y- l( eImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:. e5 i" _" Y% T W- P
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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5 Y7 C) z1 g/ ]# P5 i$ y2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.7 Y+ G1 q0 O5 l( V+ G; i. f
0 ?) a! ?7 n. h/ T"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.) ~5 L2 T- T& J8 D1 }$ h" I0 a5 v
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States". }" e* p. C' H' `, ?# W! U
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.3 t' e, [/ n' ^* a8 ]$ N
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
