 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe., b5 x6 o+ G; F- C6 P% ]
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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: U8 X# T0 F$ b9 yI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years., X( S4 s6 W, h3 s0 V! i
6 m Q$ {' t* e1 W t& K) Q, XI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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3 ~: Y( r) [" P2 }+ ?2 e$ l"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"; W5 W( f( ?" M! u {0 j
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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/ ]& V+ c/ k& X8 c4 @1 }And the second one was:
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% o* M2 x) D4 |7 C9 s; |; `"What's the 2nd Amendment?", d' r* ~: E; H6 o/ E4 M5 Q, {( ^
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?, Z1 Y& G1 D) j. f- [5 t: F
3 z- [& M; Z; K" {2 n% f0 o"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!9 k0 p: I% e8 L8 m* [
3 p/ h# p5 F) a: p4 R+ BI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."2 N# j" E. p: F% o6 y5 J8 L
5 j! j& O* }. ?, iSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"& ?$ S+ ^: H) b
) U& R3 ]: F% QNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!" W- J# v* o+ f! I; W0 h
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, M8 h. i) |0 n! n' S2 g( AImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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; Y8 m/ S/ g. N7 T1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.8 d& E( M y6 M; ~$ M
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms." J5 b$ {6 L% l4 [8 |2 h9 z) o5 f
9 }4 a* G$ @" l8 ^" f0 b( B' r. r"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.- |7 x) M% s, d" `& _
! r% m# ~" t3 l" t5 q, D- lJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.- q' G( ~2 ]' J0 y1 P: x) N+ h; A
: W% D. h& J6 GThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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