鲜花( 19) 鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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/ p% j- k2 i: I6 z% lI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:3 K% q/ N9 v9 n. d8 G7 u
3 E# y/ a6 u/ c; p8 u8 A"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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% F7 @& q- X8 h! c! b" {3 tI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?+ z1 |5 M: Q) B9 \1 @+ N" O
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?* x% T F) ^2 g- N5 V8 i
! G4 C, K E. A: y"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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7 }: g1 R$ Z' Z3 h6 uI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?; @4 K: ]- E6 b7 `6 _ a% D
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."7 _0 T9 n. \; k4 h5 X) [
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”9 M P9 K4 }1 z1 U3 R
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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' e# x1 s. ]4 w1 K a; m' t. sThank you very much!
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+ M! Q3 E, j5 G. }+ \, B7 yImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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2 ^) ?$ c9 e5 V4 t' g' D1 J- @1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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' L8 ~; W8 s9 r: `7 |) M2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.8 z9 U2 ]* a1 O/ V: `/ E
4 h& l. M: S& e"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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( y$ x5 Q+ q& VJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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) z3 D# j3 Q" N; z) nRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.+ T, b M- q- o1 c+ n; y
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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