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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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' J- b) z5 a8 _Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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: J2 }9 X: p. `7 O, J- T* d/ e' R1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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5 s$ m$ u. y: Q2 ` B2 K3 R; ^4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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, F& }( y7 g9 U( L. C5 W6 k5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area1 ~! ]$ [2 E" C5 q9 I3 h' Y
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.6 x, Z1 S8 b) k5 }1 X
L/ u& |4 g$ q8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask4 P) R/ Z8 ^! U3 U" c# W- h
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'& H9 `% l4 f1 s4 y1 o' P/ b1 z
" l: @4 m# i V# U9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.4 W; s6 j: A3 t. l" y) W- F5 v
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels. o1 M8 ?; L6 x8 y* R8 x
1 m M( @- R) a, e$ u( U9 x13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!5 D: A H4 O: U
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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4 X2 I. F& M! n. mAnd; last, but not least!)
& z9 J& F: H. v. {. J7 [5 t15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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显身卡
发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
