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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?3 L% U! M" {/ Q7 ^, _
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Let's face it
, t, @3 z5 c7 _ [8 FEnglish is a stupid language.
7 X* z4 Y$ {& h2 g7 D" X9 g8 ZThere is no egg in the eggplant
* x5 D- i( x) d7 O# RNo ham in the hamburger$ |# f) D, y6 W# y0 ]9 ?
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.0 K, w# R) j- V$ v/ S, }3 A
English muffins were not invented in England. y8 ~1 ^/ _0 M5 i; Z/ i
French fries were not invented in France. O& D- I0 V5 F! h g; x6 Z
' a& h: o; x0 O/ ]; YWe sometimes take English for granted
9 w2 \4 {! c8 y, Y5 [% o0 xBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
0 W% s' a3 E$ e$ P' r5 Q Z& I3 F$ }6 \Quicksand takes you down slowly
* I% G" y3 O4 e& O9 h# D$ oBoxing rings are square* _; J+ p( A& [ k) g9 K
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
# x) P; V4 ?' g5 F5 I% [If the plural of tooth is teeth
" E t" S0 t* AShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
$ T& |8 s! i' a9 w0 hIf the teacher taught,
; t1 c& J3 U& ^& t& ^7 O" F& h7 X+ Q, U5 iWhy didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
5 L) M% B& s& |( |What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?# D1 w2 V5 u: |+ o4 N
Why do people recite at a play
: @1 M, s( q: `' yYet play at a recital?
" v: y% j- ], n5 K+ ~' `3 LPark on driveways and
. Q1 [2 U, M8 x0 X' j6 MDrive on parkways* u- h" _ O2 I
7 ]* l6 G3 Y8 s0 n& ?- f$ RYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy. E( p: d8 K. b, g' @8 A
Of a language where a house can burn up as" [" N1 x }$ [5 b- L: o' j
It burns down
, d: |' h. e( }7 Z% y) L5 |And in which you fill in a form 0 b& g6 X) R6 t
By filling it out
' _ _1 d3 [/ W! p% u1 I3 QAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers5 A0 i: ]$ g- i6 X" [
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
* T9 @& b, } ^8 T, u" c( l(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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That is why
- x' W/ |! n0 v% [1 C: I: iWhen the stars are out they are visible
& ?9 _2 L5 r! s0 \But when the lights are out they are invisible# i: Q) Y* [3 u% k' p
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
2 O4 B* N" D8 y7 t, s1 EIt starts, X; d) S0 x+ e f3 f& r( M$ u
But when I wind up this observation,
( X) l8 D1 j# }# S/ u/ SIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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