埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 4875|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a: {+ l1 t8 Q; E& \* h" S
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
* s1 }5 z( l0 I9 S1 n2 R& y) pthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
' U! R0 j# Q- j  Zthe newfie would like to play a fun game. 2 r2 ?  S/ `$ [- |- L' w
  % d& G/ f7 ^; L9 q: u) t
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
. A2 u1 A0 n: ?7 i  | he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
/ d$ x  m( Q6 q* |3 { lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I1 r# k2 @( z) G( O+ @
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,  V; \/ B# V/ K8 H/ S4 V& j6 {
you pay me only $5. 1 i. H/ o, l6 o# w$ S
& x  c. D% b$ w2 ?% F
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
7 t/ i! U2 K; X* H( C8 w will pay you $500. % Z6 H7 b6 B3 g6 f

( z1 f  k, f  q- a This catches the newfie's attention and to keep+ M* s- i, f! \6 k* X
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 9 S. f/ f6 \: M; w2 p; Y: |7 B  _
0 c9 u( {, x/ T
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's( u) T" h6 V0 |: K# o4 m: P
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' + W' G1 W" Z) q  Z/ G& l4 g1 l
) b0 g2 j. f7 ?  P
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his6 z1 y! d) N' u. ^4 {4 N
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
0 L8 ?; A8 d9 o9 f' blawyer. * @3 \  T/ i9 Y8 h6 ]
0 o+ @' }. R9 x2 U7 J1 ^$ g
Now, it's the newfie's turn.; j2 e. ]) o* k/ Q: q3 k

2 B! H; G3 p3 f6 s: s. F/ bHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with1 r) v4 o7 v! v& f$ B
three legs, and comes down with four?'
& H0 H% J. W, \6 |5 c! M- S3 [' O" J! r! H# c9 \; P
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
# w" x% p2 g3 V8 n% Preferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all' j( @2 G* I5 B% z1 Q* L3 s7 N% j& @) |
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
- _4 ?' ?) l. V: o% yof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
/ ^8 o/ d8 w+ i) x, ~6 V9 V* [hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
, Y* I  |2 B% E2 T: p; tback to sleep.
3 i& k- b3 f2 ~+ K" ^4 O$ X( x
; t$ s" {6 j# F" J2 ZThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
6 c1 s' c" U0 D6 F' t& X2 Bwakes the newfie up and asks, ) n- E0 b% S6 h2 O+ x

! ^% C+ X5 U/ }7 i2 ~2 h'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and! E+ v4 V- }- P6 i
comes down with four?' 9 P0 H; `$ k7 d+ N$ m+ l0 D

+ ^& n0 ]* R% ]9 t8 u* BThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5) I, s! U5 ~) |7 T* u1 H& |* F+ m
and goes back to sleep.
6 w  [, \7 @2 I' C% K
1 Q% L$ c8 i3 U8 e  I
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!$ P# z5 G8 B  }; w2 w' W% X
) c3 L" w, P2 p% z
Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the9 M- L3 U# X. z0 S* f% P
( V8 G5 U- h7 v
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
: U9 q* x4 K* G7 p* l2 ?>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
& s% z, X, Z0 p>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
, _3 g) \" Z' \6 M0 S7 U>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
' \% V; l& }% [>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct  E- b; x8 O; _4 [1 ^. Q7 D
% N: i% e: I+ [5 J0 M9 [" k$ X" V& S, m
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 9 D" v; W6 l' p$ M* G* ^# ^
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a + h2 \3 y. y& I( H1 x, t
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
6 V9 D+ X+ q' ^# P0 V>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
& U; j  ]' r4 D& l* f>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three0 h9 ~: N1 q' S4 g4 Z: E

, s8 {) ~. r! j5 j8 p+ x>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's , r: T8 R: z( D/ |
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
4 d% \' y( F. M>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand * h" q$ q) i/ m. F2 o! ~* k0 C
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 3 x+ u: `+ P& c  G/ p2 P
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
& {  m& ^) O( D, p; a8 l. Y' c2 Slong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb  i9 q4 {0 D  P6 `* ^1 D4 H; h0 w
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
! v$ @6 H0 z0 i" \1 u9 `the newfie would l ...
! O- J6 V& K+ E+ X3 X- d9 Q7 n
$ t- C3 [) Q) n) |. F* Q, I+ Q$ z# x

$ c6 c7 E. {! `- O好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:  ?3 r4 I$ U9 n2 m( A8 [" b
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,! E  d: Z: V+ Z3 m" f. W
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
5 Y* G. N6 ^+ X加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
! l4 v" p  R  f2 Z: d( H, v% Y
真博学,偶像啊。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
& A3 Q! Q- G5 N& U9 G
" Z* c, F9 v- H  h2 Z* u. Q
' v' E: c$ a. y% b. ?: \2 I  E, J/ O1 ^. i2 E( n2 _  Q
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:9 y9 g" M; L( L1 s' a6 Q
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,/ A) f0 s% L. h: R
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
  B( O1 u- i( E$ N: M
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 & D3 M6 U! O) e( Y

$ f) ~  {9 W# I* e+ w. V1 z真聪明,偶像啊
% k1 s1 c( }" D: E( V5 I

) C3 H8 I  Q. b! @# A# e$ r/ E" |7 G全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
& ]  S  y. h* d
* M" P/ h- `8 [1 \5 f# w* S
- L: x& D! P( l  @) c全盘接受一下。

, }' d* @8 [! ]. s# G1 t% g真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 ! y1 M) x( O. z0 N4 H6 u

- Y. S) Q( Z) P5 g' m5 g- J- U真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
6 {& H0 x+ n! H/ ~
1 w- f" G; l4 J
- t3 e6 _* y0 \$ M: h
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
% S/ Q! I3 W3 {* b# p( c8 q
6 {9 E1 z* {; v
8 M9 w1 c! L: b4 C5 `  l8 ^  X1 {$ d+ d* o; T# V% {, n, a
别把我往坏路上领啊。
  z4 n9 B3 t! V* i: z. K, K( i
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 & {. [$ y( E, ?& T  e, Q
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
+ T, g7 I8 |) Y% y+ I9 G- q
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表   P5 e' D! y1 p. X  ]$ [& w% H
8 e$ {9 y6 y$ O6 P( _) B: I  p
真博学,偶像啊。
# R8 q4 _7 D" P- T) U/ Y, g8 m
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
* {/ h7 L3 [; |2 x3 B" h& L7 b; `
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
& ~' r4 ?2 t$ b% N2 e
她是大学教瘦?
  X& h( S" l: C0 }大学教胖还差不多
& ?) g3 o. @. |: A她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
. ^) T2 G$ O  l" z, Q! w" E紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
2 N( p2 B) @/ l
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 % I$ h4 g% q5 ]! b7 j$ E9 ^
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

0 q. Y  W  ]  |  s' U
) V) m' e( ]$ ]$ ^( ]哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-3-13 21:30 , Processed in 0.219717 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表