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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
8 m) R, f$ \7 Along flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb3 l6 D  B2 w4 R# K4 H) U
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
& Y" E& W2 k+ wthe newfie would like to play a fun game. ' g; W0 O! M, ?7 ^4 o5 r9 ~5 M
  
% ^  z4 r- q& r. G The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so1 A% [1 M" X8 H: o
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
, H2 N1 ~, e) L lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I  y- Y, f" Q3 `" R& w9 L
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,2 F4 Y( e2 l! e+ P4 Y
you pay me only $5. ) l% e3 @; _' L8 W- B

! E( t* C7 g, j' X You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
  D5 a9 ?4 ]2 C  K6 s. j0 X, Q8 _ will pay you $500. 0 X4 M8 w# w5 e& n/ ^: Z" q

1 e! a: I& F: u" A This catches the newfie's attention and to keep, y* h: L7 ?, C8 X% g8 O! `
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
: A5 K+ }: o! L# g7 F
% v+ o  B1 w5 `( b- `1 }The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
+ @) D4 H! `* [  m! `$ t+ N0 l+ ythe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' " z7 k* H7 f! q4 u
6 U+ o! [+ c( c: Y
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
! Y  T2 |8 H7 D; S$ p4 X" Gpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
/ T3 w5 U* J1 y9 v5 C" j1 l% [lawyer. & z8 H3 T- g3 N7 C% e8 q3 t9 ]; N

9 `% Y6 S  N1 U& _% P2 ZNow, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with. w' t* g$ M- s0 a
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
2 ]; y' C: J1 q: Z% h9 Qreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all$ g: {. @/ R5 h. `4 E1 }
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
: S/ [* A( A& ?8 ^of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and5 `. y6 ]/ [; F  c, Q1 v1 J
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right8 i& }8 h0 Q  O8 J6 Y+ Z! `  @1 V
back to sleep.   C  }* b: B, e- n/ l
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
: H1 q. v! {; Uwakes the newfie up and asks,
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" v, f7 z- ]; _( G'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
$ |/ Y3 C$ m6 _: i/ {comes down with four?' ; y3 q7 A; A! Y& Z. F* j/ Q! E

; i1 p. A5 v/ v, M# W- }2 u2 bThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
+ r! o$ Z6 M8 m( Dand goes back to sleep.: w- B2 `% a/ F% c% q( m3 @( H
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
$ p7 e# N2 E) D1 {) N+ \: k* W% |' b' |6 g# [
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
+ o) B  k% p$ C$ l>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason $ N3 ]( x8 h7 j% M! w
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
3 A9 U& T8 `7 V. j: r8 Q/ V# Z6 [>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
% r6 q! G0 X6 m>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
3 L  i# G' s3 |. E" H$ y+ H4 m0 ?% @+ B' ]5 ^4 g% D% s0 U7 H+ u9 B' i
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
5 Y; A/ _  i! P>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 3 M  t" m+ L$ M8 P
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
5 r" R; ^9 J2 r+ y: ]( e9 l+ f$ n>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, , m' v$ f( Q" q' h) y  f
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 6 o) M. S% ~4 n5 [) N
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 7 m: Z; `) w8 b# I1 p, S
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
* [6 b  q$ Z* d2 X& X+ F>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 ) `/ t) z4 ]$ ]5 F/ r% R( z# b
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
2 W2 g- N1 X6 G- Along flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb, f0 L5 ^6 n/ g' ~  n# o5 B
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if5 h4 }: b8 f8 T. E7 ~
the newfie would l ...

0 r  S4 }5 u1 h$ ]* g* ?
- Y# @5 a  \' S
) c4 \# T9 B7 I- F/ k" r2 Q好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:4 d; u& L# c4 b/ W! i# ^
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,# Q, u& E) }9 ?% h6 V
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 $ C$ \( T9 _+ W6 N. h" Y
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
' V, `! F+ r. b
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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3 x' D2 n1 Y; M
& K! M: i1 U  C. l& h
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
0 t, P* Z/ h# Y4 z  I: d  X7 G2 D“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
% k- G4 @4 R! w+ r& j好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

+ ?! P3 S" }$ I真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 4 @3 R+ o0 X* o) l4 ~4 F$ x
) O& J  z% }6 ~* h0 A$ S$ @
真聪明,偶像啊
% m5 k) l& e9 }
, Y) V; W3 T6 G% h
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 5 V* D5 s  [* N* P
$ P7 ^3 t7 d: b1 J' w& u% @

" M8 }7 @7 d, L+ [全盘接受一下。
/ {: ]9 ~; {0 X
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 / i2 z% _; ~7 ^  G

) D* O. B, g; ^& @- f6 d真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

: {4 ^7 W7 A/ c, _
. w2 U7 ~$ S/ p4 G5 [0 D: r: {
% e1 {: R1 b" ?别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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2 k2 [% T0 ?1 K* |
0 _6 n; W" d: i* M1 @! W别把我往坏路上领啊。

: \* S4 m/ E9 A+ I你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ; I& z& _& [8 W- @% ^2 Q, {
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
8 c7 r2 Y" m7 L% K7 b+ |$ G
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 + R9 M( M3 ~5 ]& R) F
' d- p2 w7 y6 M; U/ O) ~
真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?; v7 h6 A' |8 A  E/ n+ |" R# z
大学教胖还差不多
# n6 K& \6 v" l: s- W  E9 v她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
  r8 w; H  ^( {1 Y) G' C  h紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
+ |; }) [' ~0 o3 {
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ( q" M2 I1 D; W  R( q/ i5 [6 I# t4 v/ P
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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