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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a  V6 {  [# e9 ?3 x
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb# `4 E6 w& C8 l/ O' S6 [6 c  f* o: k
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
% B  P& M4 o- k8 p) gthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
, q/ T2 Q) n& ?  
3 ^1 H% S. c& l The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so: A$ u) P, z; f$ a4 Z
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The* W! o5 u9 ~* s7 S3 r9 d" {
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I; E( j* L4 S5 e8 V" |' b# X
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,) g+ i- Q2 M& I* `
you pay me only $5.
+ F, p7 z% }; Y0 H
/ p* c6 C6 q' O0 o) t, U2 g1 R You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I" ], h( A0 u4 r, T: b6 P) G4 t8 T/ O
will pay you $500. 6 Z, P8 B7 l2 [
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
/ H$ F, ]" L2 t/ Sthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's0 `; X5 ?; j" j7 ?, R- A
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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& t7 |0 D$ s9 _6 Y2 P2 u; u$ pThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
2 z& o. `6 q6 n  w$ f$ d3 W6 Mpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
! K5 b/ \4 T' z2 {lawyer. % v5 e4 d3 d3 X8 h

" e0 k" v8 U7 }1 B" K7 ZNow, it's the newfie's turn.) t$ r$ x9 [! W
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
* m- ?, ?7 L4 B0 v' T: W" @three legs, and comes down with four?' 2 ~9 l, e: c* [8 i; |2 R% j
; z7 e6 t0 A" u: M1 A
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
4 y8 Y7 j/ K3 G& Nreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
* m, W+ I/ h$ Y  f" ]$ othe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour3 c3 a  N7 M% r' X9 c
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and; X, b$ P$ R6 o8 z/ ?
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
+ E( z8 C0 `+ Zback to sleep.
+ ~! Y$ ~3 B5 W4 w8 X8 {5 b3 W$ d8 N$ X) ^
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
! ^9 Q& `  o' Uwakes the newfie up and asks,
6 A/ x/ d. _% \; k. V6 w" b! D( Z4 C' I. m  D; \1 l. I
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
3 t4 I% s: l. b- Gcomes down with four?' 3 d, B7 J2 g9 q
& P% n9 b0 K6 \, L* |  x
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5/ {. {$ a$ M& @1 r+ c5 H
and goes back to sleep." I( |$ i( y7 h! s" x0 Q
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!* ]5 r0 J, S2 |& O9 t

1 n/ W6 @. ~% q$ k) N2 eLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
大型搬家
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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  i! j1 n6 |1 M4 P5 Z& ]>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
& W, I4 x+ T5 H% W7 V>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason # I3 Y% d& y2 i# z2 g
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
) M/ `) w; @. |% ~% l9 _>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
# O$ r; g# @* C! ]6 [: |>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct2 {( i4 y4 J; {  Q' t
) l" e( ?) X2 p- ?4 s& D* B
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
/ ^$ {- e4 U5 Q8 w5 k>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a   T* y; Z5 X( c: P2 H' Q+ m4 b
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
& K, t" K, K0 ^; k>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
3 A* _" ~' T) k* m2 x2 x6 m- G$ m>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three# x5 [+ h3 ~! X& M4 q1 I; e
( R# k* E/ a1 t, K+ f' ]2 {
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ) U  t, z# o) p1 ?
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
8 S% s- x4 g+ A1 ~+ ^4 @) E>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand + u; ?/ N5 g! a5 s
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
* ~) x  Q4 ^# D+ HA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
6 ]: u9 F, E0 y+ L2 elong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb% p4 }$ M: l, f3 {2 r9 Q1 A$ n
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
! Z) R* M2 ?. Dthe newfie would l ...

8 E$ O* i! Y# T# k) K" C; X; v
$ s* I, q9 F. b- y. r- g9 f
6 B! X6 K2 M, p+ [+ a5 d好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
8 k: L/ i5 Y7 W* b“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
7 j9 H5 B  J  y' S/ G好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
) E" Z7 |. i( i# E3 S- `6 ]" _加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

1 @+ m: c; l' E4 C真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 * _$ q( X. M8 H0 w

) S% q' o8 t1 E) v$ T) a3 Z8 \6 M6 S7 J

$ i2 S" C- T* x# H好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
- u( N/ r6 |; J5 E& k) `; M“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,5 q( ]$ J' t+ N* E* x1 ?8 r, ]
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
0 X; l( x6 Z3 A3 w2 G+ @& P. H4 }
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ! c0 Y- @; i5 o0 f7 E  e
% ^) j6 j0 A2 q) ~
真聪明,偶像啊

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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 % H+ O9 V. \/ C8 ?
2 @* E- ?+ `4 {$ E
: o& b3 ?+ B$ L* ]
全盘接受一下。
$ L% P" B/ W9 [4 |7 L, X, @
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 7 F1 x6 J3 R! J) ^; Z. E
6 }9 u# B# O  c" F0 u# P
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
1 |( T. @/ S& ^5 F) O) T

* S5 u; o* ~8 N! N- a' o7 b
3 r1 W, m8 W' s) I5 H  J, c1 O别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
3 H7 h0 ~. f% o" r$ E- Q  G/ E0 ]; u5 t% t0 B' |/ o

# e& `8 [" k% b/ K9 z) n& Q* I! ]: i: I, X( f) k  }% K( J/ [6 l' M
别把我往坏路上领啊。
1 ?* @! g) n7 ]) E; |
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ' b) e" r1 L4 R5 @7 z
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

& [& C4 [' @& h0 Y. y, p多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
/ R4 r- j5 G3 n) u  ~! I0 V& k9 B9 y- d& ~. o, N1 p) G
真博学,偶像啊。

/ ~. G% q8 ?" _8 G5 K大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
) O# X2 ~; _. L; m/ g( t$ Z: {1 z7 Z  H# R/ Q2 [7 F# @7 _# U* V
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
5 q9 j9 S3 d8 m0 l3 N
她是大学教瘦?
$ l: O$ f" X8 L" P2 k! c大学教胖还差不多 9 v( v$ R. w  F9 b4 J
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
0 [) |' D5 y% a0 O1 q8 c6 z紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
: g% t. a) r: q5 d2 e, Q紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

2 j* [+ n  I1 s2 i' {/ m9 r0 `1 P7 v
2 K6 v# t" Q. |0 x) b哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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