埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 4801|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
  b9 y# I7 Z% \# Jlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
. e1 k! X1 a4 J# j( o2 Z) C% Hthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
# `; [0 G) S) w, _8 f8 p5 ~. Ithe newfie would like to play a fun game.
* B: U) Z' H' W. T' ~2 b- t  / i" x3 c# v! s7 O1 ^8 t* M
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so7 k4 c; }; o6 f- r$ M: i
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
. j9 K6 t2 \! z6 C( P$ I! K: } lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
3 Y8 @  z+ `% v2 }: y; \* W6 Uask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
- ?$ P& B! y3 H5 q" cyou pay me only $5. 1 z7 L% g1 ?2 ^
$ j' L/ E  X7 N
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
, d# Q) M3 g3 t1 A& } will pay you $500.
( W# T! i% T6 d' C9 }+ {! m
' a/ @" f/ Q  o This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
& z  d6 O+ K: O3 ?; [1 a1 h" dthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 6 c) V4 R( E2 u

1 Q% d: }2 T, ~- [! p; ?The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
+ m. g2 k+ ]  {, Tthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
; i, T5 p  p9 W
# v$ F! u- w! l. k. J, Q( uThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
0 l& D( ?, V( n, Y* kpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
8 r+ H0 T8 ?& _/ U: S/ rlawyer. - v  N% O9 n# J! Y2 D3 |+ M

: ~& ?; W' z3 wNow, it's the newfie's turn.
+ X! x9 g3 F8 U" X2 m9 S/ H$ g/ r; f! w( A* k# N
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with6 ^% Q! A+ F  H' c! q) H
three legs, and comes down with four?'
' v( q/ z4 f8 [# a" W6 h# J! W! i
% `( {+ R/ ~; d( o5 kThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all8 W: {9 B' \; j( B- ^. b
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
3 o2 I+ o# C. _the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
: Q; v4 c# d0 E$ T2 K6 q% jof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and/ J  r! l$ c+ o& ?, c/ L
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right- f5 E, c1 q5 r
back to sleep.
: E5 Y' Z$ B  J% P/ N
# z) I& Z' ~2 U' g9 IThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He, g9 n. o% Y' T& x7 _
wakes the newfie up and asks, 9 O# F& Z  h/ u( l; Q  \& y

  O' Y2 O$ V3 ?6 }'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
2 b9 X6 c& @  Ncomes down with four?' 3 l3 V/ p& M5 Z5 x  K. o

7 B2 E. m; I# e0 qThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
7 }' K* U3 O5 M4 A/ B6 pand goes back to sleep.
) E: Y4 i, t1 ~  m! W% U+ `/ s0 j" V. H
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!* R) w' h$ N) l
' u  l5 S7 L& H( w1 G$ N4 ]% H, ^
Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
7 G. ~2 R1 y$ g  Z$ }' @: a8 @2 T, v
, \& g- W* B8 `* p& I>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
/ r8 |, Z  E- B8 |4 J* W& ~>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
  x) i$ Z7 H) T* {3 m>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
/ O$ k' I+ v  x3 f4 i) C" ~" {>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 1 j# v# x1 u4 R3 m) ?
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct$ ^, S  ]- I# w7 A

+ a/ _! q  g' C% R>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research $ Z; h" f; }, `
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 2 K+ X& o4 O9 m; S) b# E& j
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more   l' u5 T; E0 b: R1 M  K
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, ) Y4 a+ @: x" Y& u" q
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three# ]% Y4 w* b1 g9 D' T9 m

& n5 f9 I' B& n3 o$ S" W. u>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
/ c$ {* a! G& Q" L: T7 ~9 I9 Z>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
6 U, Q  w* W6 n  a+ @* R>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 5 u6 N. ?( S" n! z' w& g0 [; `1 \
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 # C) p/ u% T7 {" m/ U
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
! I/ |! p% ]7 ~& O# \* dlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
# @, T/ I) b% c/ athat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if2 i9 X7 b9 V7 y5 R
the newfie would l ...
: v+ y/ R4 E; ~# L

! Q# z1 Q% A5 g6 A0 g& b3 Z% {8 p$ C. d- N0 |; S) B! t
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:4 o1 i0 s# v, P
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,, z: e  b% e8 ~" _# T$ x* L& O; z
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
. s* \5 c5 x2 B4 y# K6 Q加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

/ U- w, H  {, x, c' P真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 " e. A! e; u: c! m

9 c1 R) m5 q1 ~8 W, L9 D& V# C' r+ T- r- a: |+ c5 B( V" @

2 |; ~* @  s$ G- B/ ?% \8 P) ?好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
( t8 u  s" ^$ P; B( S“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
- M+ h6 ]# L- k: @1 ?5 e% }/ C好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
8 Y0 B- j& h, S! o  n( y# g4 _5 v
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
% `6 V8 _# l) h: s( S! M9 M8 d! b$ n. W, w- U8 K1 `7 K4 H2 \
真聪明,偶像啊

) X0 |3 @8 F0 @0 m1 D( w" K6 p: J. G' n5 C# N/ H& r5 b7 A
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
  C3 P7 n8 ^, ?4 S# L; y
3 p' F5 h& O; z/ T2 S, y$ O7 P2 U4 r" H0 W4 l8 W6 p7 F/ P7 c% b
全盘接受一下。
2 _: q! ]" E& v+ f4 A
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
( y* ~* K6 z+ H; b8 A0 d
" e$ v, ~0 c  z# V) Q真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
1 L* q$ c% }2 k+ t+ D+ }8 ?

& R8 i8 w4 X9 j# ~* z; s* i% P1 l: S: l1 |+ w
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 4 ^/ ^) S4 K; |

2 [. W, ^" H' R( d! G  s+ }
; Z! B" a6 Q1 d" Q
9 m, M& A$ O+ S  Q! b2 H) @别把我往坏路上领啊。

& w, s- j, X# X5 [* e' j% a: ?0 r你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
: G& V4 l% X$ a& [; e加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

; W6 K" w; p5 c) [' v4 Z& v多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
  k8 ~, h- S4 J: Z0 E: b& q
) G) u& g% I$ [& _. c2 j3 g真博学,偶像啊。
2 ]9 C! w5 I' j) q
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 5 H! Q" Y* u4 j1 r
# o0 ^4 q/ b& J* a
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

6 S% L  Q+ P! W" K) a她是大学教瘦?
9 L( u4 [; W0 s3 K) Q. k大学教胖还差不多
8 P8 F7 ]2 v6 J1 H$ N- K* t# x她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
! a4 A9 C9 G. [7 [* [2 u紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

2 {, c7 T9 l+ b0 B& e# W7 ~: D$ S3 A说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
+ o6 N% E. A1 H- R9 U紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

( T+ J' `3 U8 A- r% L3 J" a' P2 f' @' u4 {- Z3 q1 ]/ _
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-2-28 15:30 , Processed in 0.196033 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表