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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
6 U% E7 X7 v& O' E# L. ?+ Jlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
  h  X. T, E- K$ L$ r# E1 R, r0 |that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if6 g4 A& O0 b+ Z; [$ w
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
2 y/ k( S4 T0 z he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
3 ~# e- X& W' P8 o6 }& v* X5 Y lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I9 u! ~, o* Y+ s! \
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,8 i; b' {8 ~6 }" B( Q3 I- g
you pay me only $5.
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8 w0 c) U% ?8 v1 r You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
: N) y+ d3 x; V; {$ U will pay you $500.
" a7 [% T8 [# G8 h4 T) J
2 _( u* e" R) Y5 H; @6 H+ k+ d This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
8 ^3 \- R! ^) R. Jthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. . _! I: _* g1 F8 [  w
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
' o  l: E- q# A& M: athe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ! Y8 _$ |5 W+ m+ S

  j7 S* a) T: [2 L7 gThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his) M8 N1 j& N! l0 X' X' S
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the8 E- S+ S$ ~, I' s# s* \
lawyer. 0 t: a# l' C; N7 d
7 V* u' w; q: B0 w
Now, it's the newfie's turn.0 q9 y1 C( n, S1 ^& E% x4 l& P

( y  J1 Z: R/ k; o/ H" p& xHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
8 v3 j% [' C$ d" A- G5 ethree legs, and comes down with four?' , Y: ~$ u5 X) r* Q
! n8 ~2 M9 T4 P0 A! w0 a6 n% A
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all, V' x9 G3 P5 @& ], v8 S$ U. G
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all, N. r3 A) g) t/ C3 u' h
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
% I3 I' w% ]# R# O5 |3 r3 s) E' qof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
' V& E- A6 c- Ihands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right. h) a, v. D, s+ r6 w% q1 @
back to sleep. 8 |9 j4 F5 b/ `. F: p

, c! C' \* Q' B* Q- M; ^The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He- H4 q8 X' D# c7 r+ H- N
wakes the newfie up and asks,
2 D7 ^- u' b% M' L" Y( G8 `3 j2 [2 b! V( i5 I5 I1 I! k
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and# j8 n" _5 l- i$ q8 e6 E
comes down with four?'
+ }9 i# o+ o- k' T, }
% M% }) U5 a- ?8 m! c$ b! V' d, mThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
! N9 J' y$ h: _; Wand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!+ Q# X. O7 A4 n1 r7 n7 J+ v
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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. a% K2 q+ d; |1 a4 e>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
4 o0 W$ f; X: I+ b>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason ' K8 A& l( Q, F/ i- p5 l
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the 7 ^  X4 H* R% R. Q4 N
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 1 x4 k0 q0 Y! x  D( _: ]
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct2 o& T: X' W6 r& \% o6 B

4 ~9 E' G2 s" q( }) B, B6 l>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
7 ?2 X& x- L: N>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
5 S: v/ Y5 W: D, m+ ~>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 7 T# |# C! H$ @
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, + O8 |" n$ w& N/ e: l3 ?) L( s; V6 F
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three( H- z  M4 X. }. z

* {0 H( c, a! {  R0 h& q' L; P>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 1 a4 ]0 n$ ?+ p: l4 l
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the # ^# O9 j) t- q" e0 h4 `
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand ! s1 f  i! m8 \7 a0 [& A
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 9 J$ q2 B! [6 t' j+ @
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
$ g5 G- `. A/ x; Z! wlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
* N3 A7 ?: ]# i% P) ]that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if3 }7 d0 Q; ^+ ?" ^
the newfie would l ...

% R$ |/ c: Y4 c* y) {9 s& q1 R3 m1 m/ g# Z8 U' @' U; S
$ {6 t  [& O, V5 Q. ^) |
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:5 ~+ Q+ G- p' U6 P
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
# [# q6 T! t$ }" G好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 - b3 i# M3 A7 f* r2 ~1 p# q
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

( L( ?& ~$ Z% m3 c5 X# u# y真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ' `4 Z8 X  H4 k; K. H1 W
6 _! h$ ^" A8 B3 P

( J& \3 o, o5 Z4 p. R" o5 A1 P0 i8 ]# Z
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:  G3 T9 z& O0 D; s
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
, g4 u  u! L3 d- z) t好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
( R: p2 `; E- [3 [1 A) p4 A
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真聪明,偶像啊
4 u1 Z# ]  {- O  y1 C

7 O2 B1 B- f0 W1 `+ ~: Y全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
6 @% E( J  u7 s" x$ g7 l# o5 L# J" j0 z! t! D5 F
: A- m+ O0 L4 F( O
全盘接受一下。

, f5 i+ O  d7 H7 t# u7 d真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 6 e& y& e3 _- I& R7 }4 A

) r3 I; l* f8 Q& h8 c/ {真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
$ F2 J2 \: s! U7 H
' J; A4 ]9 M9 p2 @1 |6 A( }5 z

  X- l+ o, l" L! d3 B7 N1 k别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 0 t& Z7 E& }1 b- \6 ]) }8 D' @. n
7 \6 m( ~1 ^$ R" U! o; ~2 @# u& ?8 o
" `# m7 I. w- H; R2 \2 }

7 H3 R0 p& b) M' B别把我往坏路上领啊。
' O6 M# A! u9 v& B" ^* z9 t
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 / G% b2 }* X; O; k% B8 Z, K% A
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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7 k, o5 {) R% w8 A真博学,偶像啊。

/ H& r$ ~( t4 e$ J3 ~大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
9 ?" M# a0 [/ h2 j
她是大学教瘦?
9 A6 h% w' ^3 ^2 A& A# l大学教胖还差不多
: T4 p  J; C* G5 c( G3 O她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 : p4 A$ F, t( ]  Y/ @
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

4 @# W' \8 x* t; @& [0 d# S; i2 J说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
5 Z/ u' |6 f, [紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

7 y( L3 |$ i8 Y1 P
- Z4 D9 i  n9 |' D哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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