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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a& `1 t! T# W8 ^' A4 y# X# A
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb& C* L; P* i5 L, K' L. r1 ^- D
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
1 v- s% R7 J. ~2 Rthe newfie would like to play a fun game. + R) f* t0 N# H: k4 w' O
  
3 O$ g2 }% x2 s4 V The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
6 b. M5 t6 Q+ p7 k he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The4 S( T% I, T/ K8 r
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
: B$ _1 g2 O) a; i# H# B2 b' y& N" iask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,, I( q$ Z! q1 H5 ]
you pay me only $5. % ^; C: g- D. C! i( F

. c3 u) t) f8 j5 M  e3 X( d! } You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I) O  O% g6 e6 M# E9 ?
will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
4 X1 p7 I# _9 b) O  }/ i0 U8 B; r$ @! fthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
% [, V& `# q/ \: |3 n$ ^
2 Q: t$ f! {2 w' g5 E* R$ gThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's6 d, W& D4 T; A9 _3 w! \
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 7 k7 ~0 U! ]+ k, m

& ]4 e: l! L% [0 v7 l0 ]+ T. N* OThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
7 U- ~9 u7 Z0 @$ p/ s1 Dpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
- Z3 a  N) O& plawyer.
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" m8 f# l% g! {& T3 zNow, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with! {' K, q! H" c
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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4 h5 y+ s' r8 |1 N8 y6 hThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
& J3 d& @/ {2 {9 Areferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all! i0 m+ ]3 b: b( l
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
$ Y) s; c( S3 a1 yof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and$ e* ]9 I$ @) I6 N
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
( W3 r3 R7 w: R7 o) k9 Y7 kback to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
+ J3 L9 ?" c4 j( D/ g2 G& X7 @wakes the newfie up and asks, / C9 B0 s) q. z( l: K' |- w7 J8 _; q. E

2 C# S& g% y6 R'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and* v4 ~6 z# D$ k+ |
comes down with four?' 1 K5 R9 M/ e" Y9 a
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
1 v1 e* `0 z" a7 sand goes back to sleep.- l( {# Y4 F4 M4 T" q4 y& `) }5 {

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!+ V8 T% a: {8 _# x2 b) O

# R% [$ Q8 Z* B+ [Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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( p6 l4 F0 [* B0 w  J0 Y! i  M>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
, X" d1 v- W# F4 t0 o" B8 @>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
7 s% l( K$ J1 O5 `, w>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the 8 Y2 g0 p7 O, p) w) `% n
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, / G; p5 K1 y5 W; i& k" X
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research ( }1 u; i/ H- v) r1 d5 _/ n
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
" Z' U" A3 v) l9 T- I* p0 t" q7 W! e>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
& F6 g/ H" N' j8 Y- y6 S2 h>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
/ o& u$ T: w# Z6 ?; R+ B4 y) B& K>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three/ {  Y6 P5 V, |: n4 j" ]% f+ D* ?

+ _: L. s  F$ X! G$ x1 U2 U>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 8 {. M- d' S: d2 P, q" w0 A8 a
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
& G; i: g" ~* v) }  X>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 4 _' Q) e' _. y, v& b
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 1 K5 {& I& g1 G; X
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a0 V) \; Z! [$ `* W- m; D7 ]2 A
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
) n1 q8 U) ~0 _& Bthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if2 }8 l8 x# e/ }8 h7 y8 v
the newfie would l ...

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5 ?# ~1 H% S* C6 E9 a- e. t  _8 G. r
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
$ \. B- z. k; K/ X/ ^* @3 d“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
) B! b" e( t1 ?3 @- m. N好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
# s4 M$ R2 @! P& L/ M加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

# _% l* [$ A% ?' U真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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- d4 ~5 l- }- R9 R, G4 n* y: O4 P9 A! o/ r9 w" w7 `' ]
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
! ~) m" k; a& k) B! d& ^0 T“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,/ u+ O' I' {7 N- H# c
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

3 |% {2 o1 s: i6 b4 j真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 , x, p+ s: \) T6 R. E

" A& w" p+ a! ]真聪明,偶像啊
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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
$ h/ v+ X8 I$ S: `! `9 ?& H+ G& O% x- i: `3 v  A% r9 ?( _
8 }( J" c/ z7 }0 g8 a2 F1 C
全盘接受一下。

( b- g, |5 @$ {真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表   j4 V# F' {6 C* i- L

& F7 Q0 }# \5 ~# Y& X- o! N真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

" [+ V/ p, g  G% R' V3 I7 i
  H7 W  R, D  O/ i/ K8 }
6 j* z* ^+ o* p8 Q; d3 o3 `别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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# l& `- p) Z0 x: z) J$ Q1 b3 b' k, w6 f' [' p
别把我往坏路上领啊。

1 [% _( z- Y" a$ x& u* M' v( g你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
0 h0 L9 t5 G. {4 w7 x加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

2 r0 z5 W$ Q" Q: p' {! l多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 1 @% v5 `4 u' R6 ?, H
  Q5 U* U% g) q3 I9 m& }
真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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+ ?! ?+ s) A( T# s2 Y大学教授哦,能不剥削?

6 @& R) \7 O: `1 b- \/ C她是大学教瘦?
' ^9 R) B2 U% K2 @* N" R, Y9 L大学教胖还差不多
; a( \% T. H0 m; L她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
  j4 P0 l# y# q" Q: ?5 ]紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 0 h0 B. Z' y2 R4 Y% L
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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