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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a& P( `: H0 y+ v& z! v/ O4 A
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb# K% t6 J4 z3 A: h% v- [
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if7 Z) {- ~/ _3 W5 k! I
the newfie would like to play a fun game. ) {" g1 Y5 J9 J
  
9 ?' o9 T( U4 B+ h The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
1 H9 p# X- j* d+ v" b he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
: A8 e1 s' \6 {( N& N lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
$ u: n; f' r6 Q) \. L6 l- |ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
. `' [8 }0 W& {you pay me only $5.
4 V3 G# O; y6 e/ b2 ~
+ k. k, P- c0 m( ^. v+ p You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
, l" o( W. Z3 u. w3 J2 E will pay you $500. 1 }! I0 `- w# H# J2 _

* r8 C2 _5 r: I This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
2 O7 c* E& G; U" e! Xthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ) c% o" l" L* p- }
1 ?, {2 k1 j" d& u  q8 ?- t7 U3 x# g
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's& \. g! g! U4 [, T6 f8 ]/ p# K
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' & u+ k) v- X, }& g4 ]

- k$ k# `0 g2 ~# ?8 @1 KThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
; D" M# U4 L3 r7 w6 n& Upocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
' o5 c% U$ E: @4 |" ?lawyer. % s+ `  H, E8 t# F+ X% E2 |9 r

+ k# X( ?/ f& [0 _Now, it's the newfie's turn.
6 M3 `. p! w# j3 |) v  N# D4 f  O% m0 m8 [4 Q1 J
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with* y( S! _  t, T
three legs, and comes down with four?' ! Y7 r6 x+ {4 \8 L% Z5 W

$ c( F* I4 ], }7 oThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
  w9 S+ B4 K0 s2 O. Preferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
$ A0 R0 r( x. B- ^the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
5 ?# w5 R' ~! j! @; t: Tof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
2 K1 G3 Y8 \6 d$ p6 ohands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right$ y; x2 I, e1 F7 D; g' T( M2 V8 B
back to sleep. ) Q5 `6 W# _/ e4 J) a, \
' ]2 g, ?, x  X. i& `
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He3 u. ~% L0 w- C7 R+ M  O! o
wakes the newfie up and asks, ! G" i) t5 \! N$ m7 J4 W

: I& Z- a+ V0 \'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
# N: d, ]) {# g' ]0 Vcomes down with four?'
* a: I7 M$ u. j; h1 d: @: ]) {: t! B) k% r+ h* `
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $51 j5 v5 S  G: K5 K( ~# S9 g8 t- w, @
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!8 f3 T( b. }  f  p: x6 O

  f* m) w( h7 `1 T& ELawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the* r3 }% l6 S* q8 [2 a

2 [" D7 m7 F# F# W* @>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two / M2 X& D) z. Z0 m
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason + A4 S  d( n9 }. D: o% o! q" m3 |
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the ; S1 ^- U  X- m8 ~2 U
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
' |- I# e) s) E- n9 `/ e6 [>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
, G, E. b) W& g/ E) s: r3 f5 p* A: t8 S
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
# |: `' \+ {" C>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a . m7 H4 ]' E0 u3 {" }
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
( s( U) Z' u* F4 C- {! F>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,   @: ~! `$ R/ A2 ^" q/ _0 k
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
9 z9 e3 i! y5 \; T! c" n% `0 S! s$ Y; H' c( p/ A: J: ]
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 7 T$ h. J- p7 W$ N: d
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 8 e7 n, J8 x7 r9 J: r- N, ]; B" Z
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
3 t- N% C* k# C  g2 N! f6 R- I6 Q; |" ]) }>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
/ ?9 B' K! f) f  D! TA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
, @% _: b) U- J$ M2 ylong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
+ Z* J! U3 Y/ M+ O+ othat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
& i  o; @9 Q: Fthe newfie would l ...

: b% @' _  {# r5 H' N, H
" B6 c4 b5 @- z
: v1 ?! s" h2 @3 ^0 m好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:. M+ o+ l6 |( \! r6 D
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
" L* E, k/ m) h7 `" c好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 # b6 _8 r" G+ E5 t) q: r. F% b
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

( c3 g0 Z8 @+ _! T3 U真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 % j& U( p* O6 ?0 Z

5 ^# b( o, f4 R/ ~! u; \
) f* }' Y  V$ s; B; \% j7 h4 H3 I) {# e& r$ ?7 T9 _6 z
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
/ x+ x: F) A; B- W# c“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,5 R; i3 ]( J1 |" g
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

1 @6 Z( }- @1 l" ^  P, K真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
2 O0 O, @3 `4 v
' B) J* P( q" }/ L真聪明,偶像啊

8 S  g, ^% U( ^5 V
2 o1 Z5 z/ g% }) h7 A' S- f全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 9 \/ _9 w6 s, d/ A: K8 s& d2 g" c
+ w% c! ]. c0 }( }* `

, e9 \8 G# U0 W& U1 e) G全盘接受一下。

: G2 A2 A! |0 S4 ]真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 ' D$ c9 _; R% F% x
; i% e: T9 A2 t& G: z' |7 e
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

* D5 }' l" d- U/ F' i1 q. m0 z8 z0 w; q2 L

, l1 ~: t6 w3 H2 N- \; j别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
* G1 Z( m" e2 ?) W- N1 e
1 B0 U* o: o, x% |, l% e) d  ^. }3 D+ ]2 _( R9 |* U* L

2 q7 R0 e1 r1 D+ x别把我往坏路上领啊。

2 \1 i8 |6 p8 E5 W+ X0 c! z( y; x你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 7 N% h) h; H4 p
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

% F% T' {- o; n( p- A. f多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
7 Q6 k2 _  z! [  R/ g" C
# P( S( t/ q& }8 B, v, j/ Z真博学,偶像啊。

0 ^" Q! f: m$ [7 h8 G! K* {大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
& V+ f1 j; A- }; ]* ]3 J, b- L& v
- [+ ^2 v" Q8 `9 [大学教授哦,能不剥削?
( Y8 x' W. I8 o5 a8 ]
她是大学教瘦?7 n* B6 {' s, e" {
大学教胖还差不多
2 q5 b8 f! \8 K: s' ?% W她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
: d* A8 l3 ~/ v% d; H3 O4 T+ Y紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

2 q5 z! O, x+ m8 p+ m% |说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
% l5 D- o# ^/ ]% {( g紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
" z3 m# i3 D: j' I0 {9 [2 P6 i

/ g0 J. H' B! y" p) @& ^哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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