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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
& _- z' h+ B& i4 T& @$ m0 Elong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb4 _/ d4 q+ v2 t. H
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
4 q; \$ m2 \$ H8 X9 h& R0 N  Q: N. ~the newfie would like to play a fun game.
0 A3 m# {6 Z. {, |  
7 @. Y8 e  O7 a6 P The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
" O: v( V! n" K1 i9 a he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The# I' F" e' Z  g- c; g; }
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
* \& ?, n/ F/ a( _) r7 q. nask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
; }" V: j1 @/ T. e# _+ y4 q/ oyou pay me only $5. ' [9 l0 c7 n$ r: ~, u

2 _! |; z) y( M6 k You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I4 O3 C0 ~3 m5 x3 L+ b  `
will pay you $500. 0 Y# u0 }8 f; S9 p5 m
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep' T1 g3 V& f4 N3 @+ r4 S; X/ }
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
2 d) j; N6 d  o( Z% f+ h7 B
9 Q4 Z( {# E% w8 ~9 |The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's% G% s$ ^+ ?+ r4 `" d! O
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
! [3 m5 @' P  }0 r. Xpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
3 k4 |1 f7 L9 i. {/ g6 N4 h$ tlawyer.
* s" m$ l) R: _7 S+ d& @3 m5 o  a8 ?1 n/ N
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
; ]5 ]: x0 ?8 y+ I  W1 y; t9 i( U9 _! J; \& I7 r' t' V
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
4 A7 ]# k) n( L# `3 Athree legs, and comes down with four?'
5 [; R% o; m( {8 n0 r
% W) |2 v, t  ^' n8 c5 m5 _; xThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all1 X$ F, F7 P9 @9 Q7 r
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
# `: h6 B; w# v( E+ othe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour& \! u( ]' T( U: u+ J, \% X7 R
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
) Z3 F. x% ]$ yhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right: p. z& |0 ]9 j: s* J3 |
back to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
; D# M1 H+ p" y. y3 e1 Nwakes the newfie up and asks,
/ X: t0 \( X& L5 F6 _: h/ v
; Z, z3 _6 A! G! F' Q+ @# Q'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
, g. ]. u# Z( k( t' }comes down with four?' 8 F2 ^0 M6 K/ N0 l- ~
: @5 ^, X& G( s$ D
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
1 H6 |+ W8 \0 f$ _9 v7 E9 x* T, q+ Zand goes back to sleep.
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8 L( F+ J7 l, _; A
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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. R$ c# r+ s6 E' kLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
1 y. H  x1 t! ]" R+ e% B. m6 h! P2 X& r$ B* O+ }7 g' A
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two % U! l* _+ v$ x4 y4 L- O/ |* c
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
$ u2 h$ W; I3 N3 f/ Z3 [>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
! Z; f! |% X4 v! J>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,   s  b$ n3 T8 `6 L
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
) }' ^) r5 i* A0 p! ^" F>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 2 j0 C8 S* z3 v5 S7 h9 n
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more & S* C+ D6 Z4 Q: r1 {: Y# g
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 1 y) ~& z' k1 m! n4 O& d
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three3 q* E* V: M# H8 P3 d- ]
# X. z7 y; C8 a' N7 |3 g1 Y
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
& a& J; b  H- Q+ r' o, w>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
8 R% i" O. i; s/ F5 r3 f>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
6 I0 ]& o  K* z' A) n8 n; K>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 ; ^" N& K& K; ^3 m0 u- p
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
" r) w$ h2 v9 E' Klong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
5 b' o9 p2 t* ^0 O1 p0 C/ [4 @7 Ythat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
6 \( n. Q3 D0 W8 c# W- @! z& Athe newfie would l ...

2 z3 h9 X: L  s2 l6 X4 ?% J6 Q+ N
' \) U" Z- X! F' Z8 x
: ]: v9 |) k' O" k. G! ~0 ]好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
% F. r) `# c" ~. Q6 }1 ?6 o“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,3 a( q" s- @1 B  ~; P% l/ x5 j$ o
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
# q7 i4 S. ~1 G  b加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
9 m6 W- J8 U/ P, V
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 $ ]8 c& l2 Y- V
+ I: U" x1 H/ E0 V
, k. X; D, Q. C" W9 L3 {# d

7 ?; }$ @2 _! Y; m4 B: Z0 O好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
0 z; l( N8 ]8 i3 Y0 T& Y$ ]“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
" f. w( s& B; T, j9 k( m好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
! Q/ ]' f+ L" S* f
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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6 G4 z# d( ]: k, f, h真聪明,偶像啊
& i& G3 g" ~- \7 e1 E- [7 x3 V
5 B& _. R( x6 u' y6 ~$ P0 c0 m
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 # T9 G0 Z( j8 y1 p0 W# J6 v9 [; b
6 Y- t+ ?" i4 J# W3 C' H. O: C

& {4 v" ]$ t6 |8 U  ]! A全盘接受一下。

# `3 c" ^/ j, O, b7 _: {真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 , F- C+ F. B+ {8 c7 I% {
1 Q: s4 x; c4 N; a  |
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
3 l- l/ ~/ D6 H. S% G$ m1 w

% l( X' @, a( `6 j& C
. Q* c3 [+ b1 h4 `0 O* e别把我往坏路上领啊。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ) c, m$ `; A0 h' {2 @7 D$ `
7 G* A8 W% n# g, H1 B4 f

, y( s# S# F) Q& K& k6 `. J9 `  x7 \1 S
别把我往坏路上领啊。

$ l# t2 y% m0 G1 c- @你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
: Q5 N. J# B8 {' Z2 w9 C  u加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

: R: c  B6 v4 ]! g多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 9 q+ |  S. @9 Q( y' C5 M
. `, n% V5 G- h$ l0 L
真博学,偶像啊。
6 ?2 J: X  f& K5 f" v+ k2 G+ l/ O
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
! Q2 K" X3 N8 T* H7 O4 M+ y, U1 [# H# N9 q! [9 A) a+ Z  P) h; {  s2 o* K
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
) E2 Y; n* J. X& A
她是大学教瘦?
4 x& O* j: w7 D( i, ~& ^大学教胖还差不多
! P: L0 c' _8 k* Q7 C她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表   ]4 n: `- H8 Z8 A- I& J( Q5 ~# P5 b
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

) [' G$ p. h& O0 _# Y$ x2 A3 r* {: E, ~说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 & Z/ K4 C/ v& y2 l1 C4 }
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
. L; @6 q8 K2 C9 {# _: Z) b/ c

( n9 V& b( @3 S哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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