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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
. e& v6 z9 k0 tlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb9 v' q% L! P, _4 ]: x4 J
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if* o! ~3 K' l$ i: V+ W  _) T8 z2 j. \; T
the newfie would like to play a fun game. ) |4 W' f$ i0 c! |1 r* W5 C
  
9 q+ J0 ?' \1 k) o1 R! C' m# e The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
( N( I! I$ Z! B& F5 z, c; q# L, @ he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
: v' f& ?+ x) [/ ~ lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
% r# O& e  H, C3 A5 I" pask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,# S% |! G. ^% V$ f, Y3 X
you pay me only $5. 6 T9 p( _: C8 _3 _8 @6 L, M/ r

' p0 h0 @2 \" v1 R1 Z3 h& A You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I/ n& }; z+ e7 A7 H3 `$ y4 u
will pay you $500. 1 |& c* i% T' B& S) k4 z

; x1 C# S" r, z- v' J5 y This catches the newfie's attention and to keep& }( I; _9 W! A: T+ n$ S5 n
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ! ]- S5 |" B7 r- W% V& ?
, K, _1 k3 k+ d5 U5 Q- v; m, `4 E
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
' V# F' B, W) D- M6 ythe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' % S: `0 g& W* x5 v0 t4 S. B
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
2 d$ J5 _. `- |3 @0 y( {pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the. i, k7 M8 }: P8 g' b" K+ o- P1 w
lawyer. 5 W9 |, S4 ^/ F$ I

* U. ?* S3 T  w) ^0 A9 V! sNow, it's the newfie's turn.) H: t7 g5 p( K; i2 v
  q& F2 h) d8 Z: C5 P( e
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with2 F+ l$ C- _- N. m0 b' L
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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' h. h+ r  V* m8 r: LThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
, x; ^+ `+ x6 b1 n* Q: x% ]; ~references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all: j$ Z" n2 Y$ e" P- O- o
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour* f. {. w  A# u
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and1 ]% K7 c* G% {
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right2 A% x! {# H- s3 F
back to sleep. 1 T0 ?5 [3 P- f5 s. s

/ @% Q. h2 O/ w& }3 R8 Y- t  tThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He( v4 o- O% }; s# C+ m, e3 ^& d
wakes the newfie up and asks, ; k- T- U, b! ]/ q

1 m8 m4 l7 Q6 i+ S" t0 \4 a! ?- A'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and! _8 `( k% w" E! Y2 c( R
comes down with four?'
6 |' [4 f: n; q8 D. D
/ u) Q9 r) e8 Z' s% Z  `6 KThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $50 N$ K. j5 ?( O2 U: y2 x
and goes back to sleep., w; x- C4 n0 M; E# j! I
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!, b3 m7 p4 k. {( d; K4 l, C) c

* ?+ C! F9 A% y( k/ B5 w1 RLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
, L% I; e" @8 f- U, c! h: H
! [% u+ Z9 e) z2 }9 |>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two / p: L+ Q4 m$ B& }' y( ~  |
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
: O1 P0 u( v1 p) s: D>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
) [0 {! M  l8 T& z3 Z* H3 ]7 |7 w>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
# T; r8 l( g' w$ b' O>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research : n% N) J' b: e0 ?9 `
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
8 W/ P" }. l* {- s' W& V/ _! A8 c>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more : h* s1 h8 z1 j6 r1 c- T
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
2 |* Y2 {; Y& x) P# O: ~! r>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three9 ]! L; C5 B, _. O

7 A9 j6 k6 a+ {$ _>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
0 m: B" r3 x# q; u9 `. p>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
% b" M6 t  C( j1 T# d. }8 A>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand # `* H0 e4 S" x. y
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 $ i" U7 [$ q1 m& A8 O. K# K2 q
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
; t3 a& F0 g! o5 V' W$ }! H  {# m+ c6 Rlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb% B) Z0 A# ^6 L) ^
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
* O1 l6 h2 I  V4 Q/ }4 @the newfie would l ...

" e6 l6 \' m% f- ~. b( z9 p+ @- R" _. }# ^
* r9 e) z9 g& W! |2 p4 O2 j
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:6 e4 @9 d3 Q7 z/ L: y$ s5 b( R
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,$ W$ e1 A; p4 G/ E; @2 o) C7 F8 M
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 8 l$ c1 ^$ s  O
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

: w2 Q$ I* ]0 r  P0 A真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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* M4 }$ N9 P, b- m# G" z+ ]/ W$ |4 S4 B1 t8 b) P
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:! k7 n. f# I4 d, {1 @9 b. [
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,0 V5 ~. j8 a$ H  F1 x! H+ X
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
6 q" l+ x3 D( s  y
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 $ K, X3 q" n) }6 h3 x* N

0 a( T) `1 `- I6 U. d( K4 a2 M真聪明,偶像啊

  U+ T5 W" q5 G2 U" O0 q" G8 b3 ~# T1 a
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
  @) a$ O7 U1 C$ o+ @% c* J0 k+ V- O- Y+ H' Q2 X& T$ S
, d5 Y, Z2 u* {5 @
全盘接受一下。

! h7 x3 v1 J, [) R$ Q+ f真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 4 Z/ U2 w. V$ M. i4 |# n9 U3 e
! Q# W" D9 _' l  l% r/ \$ B
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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& b, X( f$ I; X. B$ o) L) `1 f7 v. v5 M; n: p/ n# S
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 / X+ T& z- R2 G! P8 y. s" D+ h

0 V/ @2 A; q( U) N) B8 `8 b; G/ M( E4 ]/ v

% f0 J: K. r* c4 `0 B' m) s别把我往坏路上领啊。
: Q$ R& q) T$ R7 k
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 / I1 k  p+ |+ z6 d8 d! d
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

. m1 U  z: Y0 e) A多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
4 ?" z6 d+ i1 f0 s6 _  V% L
( [0 V# @5 y. z) R' O真博学,偶像啊。
+ |. b7 ?; t5 B+ ]
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 " m) j0 s, ]/ P: b( b5 x
9 x4 ]  |- g: Y
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

& [1 Q1 |' n4 j1 D% t  O2 T她是大学教瘦?7 s9 _  k, {. g" D
大学教胖还差不多 ' |7 H7 K6 y6 }3 A) E
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 9 ?1 x4 y* `% Q
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

# d& {' q+ L+ d0 z8 x6 f说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 9 f3 e% K4 v+ J# a; n: j( }" U
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
* i( [7 Z: Y1 B( U: W$ ^
4 M+ i: ]7 x, v/ _
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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