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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a; ]4 B% y, k) h1 n5 H
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
% c. I7 X4 H7 c/ W) T1 ythat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
# r  z5 l+ l6 g) Ethe newfie would like to play a fun game.
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so: w- G* _' M% w1 X  q3 O/ M
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The. C2 |. L. n& c; U. ^3 ?4 z
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
: f& E' h7 S' q5 Vask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
% {7 V9 `9 O( E5 l% E: q- `/ @" tyou pay me only $5. ; \% F+ s/ b& E0 Z! p. {$ I2 R
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I$ G1 J  {5 l; n" v2 d
will pay you $500. 8 d" z- a# l5 Y6 }0 {( x" L2 }
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep' p/ H- N( I# c9 m$ O0 f5 A) h. [
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
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5 I0 G0 [9 y+ }# J9 k0 a' |8 U) q6 mThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
5 Q3 v# n/ y) `& R, h" G$ ?- Sthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 6 Q0 |  [  i  F. [. ^
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
/ L$ R& _8 d2 s- ipocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the/ O/ V* G% ^; v' ?% L7 v; N
lawyer. & J0 K2 S# a. Q

$ x7 f% u2 q) q7 O( VNow, it's the newfie's turn.* l& b' `: k* c% @' F& C/ u# X
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with5 c! J' E4 b4 T' ^" }( Y9 a
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all; u" }# ]- t9 H
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
& u: C, v" o# pthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour- t" |! T4 o" I1 H( t
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and' }9 _: q; ^; ?, ^3 R) ?4 C( I1 @' _
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right% o/ J( w) C" x( o2 {# z: n, Y
back to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
, D8 i5 m, }( l' swakes the newfie up and asks,
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'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
  `" g$ w6 ^7 i( v+ J& `comes down with four?'   \: @% G. v: C' X$ ]: \3 s7 U

! H+ I; J  o$ n' G# YThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
6 E5 X& p. a  [5 x$ ~8 Xand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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# }( f  K* u5 i# n( ^2 Q$ {Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
大型搬家
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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1 ~& `4 `) J2 U+ x$ `>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two & O7 j( n( n1 Q) n, r
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
7 p+ N% n3 ?" L, Y; x>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the ( d5 i3 \0 g$ ~* n; U9 Z
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
& b0 a1 n+ a/ B>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct3 _7 Y7 J% g7 b; a7 c5 M: j6 t
) w6 _/ N8 B# G8 @( X9 e/ q* y) o
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
( ?+ T1 o& W/ P0 G( d+ Y2 ~$ C>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 5 I2 w. X0 O% A5 Y7 L6 I9 Q/ S
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more + A2 ]- Q+ ^1 }" ]; n0 f+ x4 S
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
; x: _1 b' W3 Q) W  {. M>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
$ o: |, g! _( r. Z% L  A
- c$ X! ]% J% {0 i8 [! Z5 y>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
& L6 S# b% K0 `! S>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
  [7 d( X1 H: K% C>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand + H( g( n7 a# s  t: m* l
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 ; X$ a/ O! F, Q4 i. u
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a9 ?0 Y# l$ X" U4 U  y
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb. B. P! g& T' l$ }; l# D
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if2 g1 v/ c( N; d6 X8 @3 y1 C
the newfie would l ...

0 \  ~/ l+ a9 \+ k" [4 l$ _! e
* x1 l% R+ }1 A* @" v( x4 z0 L. ~: n, I4 l) l7 R7 g
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:5 c* e, B( a: Z
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,& _( j+ B- j/ ~( `: o
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
, }/ D  V7 I0 d; ^加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
8 P4 R. n$ i% }' d
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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: q7 ^: u) W$ M
& A" E2 z1 i& q( ?! n
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:0 J' \: N# e  ?0 Q
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,# |' V8 N9 e* Z7 C
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
5 A, C" K1 i. F
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
% s' Y, x7 y! f  J6 @, x6 C. |: s# i1 X" P1 v
真聪明,偶像啊

3 e; r5 G% d  s- ~/ U, {
& r" s$ X3 Z  n& [/ ^8 [; m1 [全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 7 ~/ k! |7 [5 @3 |: E

  p, |1 \1 F) v: A# t; |# s+ H
8 t9 T, b0 T3 k# d* S# ^1 P  ~全盘接受一下。
) c9 `9 x# T8 i$ B# ]
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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$ b& v+ X5 m8 }/ ~9 N) `真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
. f6 v' W8 D1 }& ^! L

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+ [4 A# n' ]1 ?% o% j1 D别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 # J! [( v1 H+ Q! w! O- Y

; I0 ?$ m9 F3 ^  k. ^% O  |4 N! ~7 T3 o* f

' H/ X' }8 ]' {1 R+ g/ H别把我往坏路上领啊。
6 X9 Y& J% \  ?2 o2 c: [+ Z1 C3 _  `
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
  P% E, t, W+ J9 @! F* `加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

# J. I2 d- t* i; C4 A( @) r- C: `多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 # |. R2 P( T( B& O  l

! A" x% K4 k$ x: ^: Y! P9 A; v: \8 \真博学,偶像啊。

1 O- N( C3 b4 `& r; a+ p& _5 h大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 . S' W8 }/ z& f3 t+ h
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?$ z/ {# A4 i9 z7 S, `
大学教胖还差不多
7 L1 \; k  _1 ^0 [她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ( c' T( m9 i* g! A4 H6 \: ^
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 7 T9 l5 j0 `: N! o; B( Z4 z
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
' d$ w9 s' J$ z+ ?# k4 w& N
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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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