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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a* ~4 D: b9 T" Q' \& ~
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb8 _' y8 A: G+ [6 T8 _; e7 Q
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
8 A! t/ _  ]3 D0 y7 Wthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
, ^% Z" N. c+ `5 h: r# X  
; E" |6 O8 g0 P0 ]+ V. O# d The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
" P# \& @( i' v/ n/ L2 c he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
. V4 `0 T. Q( A2 H1 m8 @/ F lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I5 |6 N0 `! _9 I' w/ O* T: }
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,) }/ b  w& s& r$ p/ `  `' o4 D, h
you pay me only $5. 9 _! o; g  g6 G3 _! }/ d7 A  `* l" U

1 q  b& }0 n* n$ k+ G7 p You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
: ?! c/ G! @8 K; V% r will pay you $500.
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" O+ }* F8 Q7 R+ [$ @ This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
' _8 \' s% \. o3 n7 V% bthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
" J  x2 d/ ?# v' G9 e- J! q% W7 E2 l
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's" r7 y' Z' l' O; e* N
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' , d' m* _$ B; ^- C, u

3 K  @0 e; w* kThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
1 ^" w2 L0 g2 m( ~pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
% A% q8 u" X# l( Z% o, A1 Blawyer.
8 T4 j$ L9 v9 t: m% i) M% H! }  Z: C+ @: K
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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5 ]0 r+ [" [! f/ ^; fHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
4 v6 g6 h3 w7 Q" K, sthree legs, and comes down with four?'   F8 k) g, t& _, s0 F

* f, K. i# r# V9 v: M8 V, nThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all- Z( y  D, U! n( ?, Y
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
$ D+ F% V! `1 Mthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
2 C- j" \; u9 I% e: v$ w- uof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and, Q0 k* ?. c; h3 b" E$ G. u7 M2 z0 ]
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right& X) n& q0 E  w. J( r
back to sleep. . _: ^2 X$ b8 _' ]& n

2 h8 j4 {0 w8 _+ Y8 uThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He0 p8 ]* [) v; x. y
wakes the newfie up and asks, 0 W0 d; _* n# r. ?* C- E5 B

6 }: I2 V& C5 ~9 T$ t'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
3 i6 @& d) m; m; b  {comes down with four?'
$ l7 X7 D; a3 o# w' {
: ]5 U0 F5 {, B& L! H# ^The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
5 r- r) ^1 f7 d+ z6 Oand goes back to sleep.: A& J( L7 F- m9 ^7 w; x

3 j6 D# x3 N, q$ [- O& k
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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- }4 c& x! R& f$ A  d' ?Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the) _$ ]4 a0 q8 `# ]( p
4 h" e* w% O; r, S+ I0 E2 h
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
8 l% `) i5 K$ r+ q- O  n>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason , U4 Z9 b( J: Z- h0 I! P2 t) ~5 H
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the # }6 O- v* a( F( ]. ~
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
- E/ |  z5 F  k>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
/ B* L) C5 n; c. M4 K
! b) ^! n2 _- ]>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
0 e4 v  l9 `! D& g) f: q' \5 S! z) ?>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a * _& Y/ o& }) z. u8 O; S
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
' }: l; Q+ [  e) ~! K' F>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
1 m- U* e" p. \>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
7 [( I7 V0 u# J1 s
/ j8 [' Y  p" b& r; v$ d>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's * b- i% }0 d9 E2 s5 s5 V% a; v
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 4 E" O$ v6 r3 u9 {2 l5 M5 {+ ]
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 8 }6 @0 ^7 N  P' f0 Y; j6 q' m" f8 H  e
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 ' X3 a6 G: [' Q, R8 l0 |# v9 p
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
& m; u# u, c) Q+ r% W! rlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb* \4 }/ ?! E5 ?" [
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
- Q4 S) n9 [& W( ?/ y9 Y% mthe newfie would l ...
0 l( ~; U" |$ W5 Z
( C. C1 n: o) w7 a# [3 D6 n0 G- B
! P7 @' K( Y0 L0 P: N7 o
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
& |$ |8 v+ d! d4 f: F; e/ x! H% u  o“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
4 w# G* m# [% A  K: Q) G好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
$ n# q: G* U9 k. \: `6 ]$ `加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
) T+ r' ]& }& P
真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
9 y/ Y( _' @; n5 \  v
  F3 [& {& u- H+ l+ z$ k! e/ s8 ~6 h; f3 o  w3 L
% P( P  X0 _) U3 Y- Z) |" {) ?: s( Y) a
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
7 d" o3 _% l1 _“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
+ P8 @, @5 J. Q0 @, E9 l. }好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
) [  E8 O6 {0 ]- Y( E
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
' O/ g1 X2 D& i' K; Z
* V: K' z/ y& f5 Z真聪明,偶像啊

2 v4 H( n# f" N0 i) C' u$ h
" O( F$ V. A' @1 R; g全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
! u0 `7 O2 P" J0 P' f5 P: J4 R* k* I, c% p. q7 f
7 t- Q2 A! Z( E; O- m, V
全盘接受一下。
  b* q' c: o! s$ G: u$ ^4 e% T
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 7 d( L8 i5 s0 W$ |7 ?+ V" j9 d- F

, B0 D) L" k8 x) M真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

7 G5 I" A5 I' d4 A. ^+ ?: t% j4 B0 i. u+ w
" E: }3 G: L, t- h$ Z6 k
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 # Y4 Y  A( V4 Z+ g1 t# h2 L; }
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4 l2 z" o0 ]" _2 ~% Q& l# k  k8 [
别把我往坏路上领啊。

1 n8 `0 g4 `: Z0 q. H5 U你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 3 @& o9 U* s$ K# i
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
9 @$ C$ \, `# m( g# c
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
% w+ W2 [7 r3 W" Y( \" F% N8 u# ?5 W3 q$ z" k7 k. i
真博学,偶像啊。

+ Y1 q/ R! E/ N/ r大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 / `1 s# e! Q5 Y% i$ ~- n! Z: n4 p

" X- X1 V1 R$ K6 p+ Y, }大学教授哦,能不剥削?
7 T- P- U& @: R& [: }" \* ?
她是大学教瘦?$ [" f2 U+ E0 z( ~) ?$ ?. e; N
大学教胖还差不多
9 x& T' r3 T) K: W# j她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
0 G) f2 G5 k$ B% I  A紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

4 U+ c4 P( i, k4 f* e) c/ K5 M& C1 c说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
, l+ c6 h* B9 W; z* ^紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
! J0 h* f# O- d) v% P6 E- B
) C+ l* S# [! g. s9 C
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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