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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a$ g/ U2 ^; w$ V( v+ L9 u* j
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb. I* B+ Z6 M( R4 _% y5 ?
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if0 r- p* a0 n$ a) `) O9 T# ?4 O
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
, i( u3 b9 e$ O0 B. p' m4 h  1 b, z1 p, n) C6 ?
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
$ f) B0 z9 `7 A4 q2 g he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
0 S8 \6 {* x* U' F* r) t* e/ z9 N lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I. z6 v3 Q9 h2 S( [9 O$ n
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
" T+ n' u- n9 ayou pay me only $5.
0 R% \# }) K- S9 F0 _4 P3 v # H: S  ~$ l4 X* M1 x% Q' g5 U
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I/ i7 I3 x2 y& h5 w( w: H
will pay you $500. 5 H4 ?* \! U1 e4 j; c5 M6 ?, n/ Z
; s5 V- `9 v) x. C4 E7 q
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
, K: Z4 S" ~2 S1 dthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 3 n5 B  H8 Y9 q0 o) Q" a& I

. C2 G) Z+ h. x: J$ NThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
( S. M6 H$ J0 i2 Z" z- {the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
' `; i" F7 v* m  d0 f/ q, K4 i9 L8 `; Y& ~& D! y& d- v) u
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his, ~" {. F* V0 b7 w- v; k
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the7 p! Q) ?; `/ [7 {6 W$ o
lawyer. + n! ?* N$ I; c
! p/ S% b: {+ G4 O+ g
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
6 y( H9 j& ~# O3 ]% ^three legs, and comes down with four?'
  `* X' N- j& ]8 F! u6 p8 z
# b. z/ V! c4 w) uThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
2 h. H6 z+ T, n$ Q5 Ureferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all, ^8 i! n3 K0 v: |) D+ D( s5 [& D
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour2 U2 w$ Y3 T5 e5 n! r# I
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
5 P6 r5 }& g: n! _% U$ X! hhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right" F$ i$ ?$ R. g- m- I/ M7 H
back to sleep. % f0 u9 t! }1 H. X

+ S/ c3 u% ^* e# F6 XThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He% L/ h$ E6 C4 f# u
wakes the newfie up and asks,
/ @$ }; q/ w, _) S" f7 z
+ S$ C0 n- T3 b. q- e7 ['Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and: E  C; W- R" J  r
comes down with four?' , n. l9 E6 F6 E& G) N0 R" W

4 }2 z1 i- K9 J% v1 Q0 N$ ~The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
% [0 g  D( ^6 s6 E# g3 u5 G1 L& oand goes back to sleep.
3 B3 i7 ~  H6 G! p. M) ]' F2 ^+ `; L+ @( A
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!  X' S, [* ?" D5 H0 l
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the. u% U8 X! x# \; s$ z# w

% Y7 T1 E1 e, F) j) ^5 k4 ^>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two ) A! m& O* C2 z' l. B) X* c" W
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
0 H, P1 k3 w: r* S5 Z0 k0 n2 c>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
" f  r" b- X8 K5 E! G>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
% n5 h9 Z3 V0 S3 z>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct/ S+ c8 G5 X0 v' M

; O9 J3 Q7 E  z5 J3 E# K$ j>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 4 n5 u. Z; ]1 ^7 T( H9 S  H
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a ) P. n7 g% Q& Z* P, O2 a
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 8 l+ t3 f$ M- I  b6 E% i
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
5 b3 q% X& o$ z( d5 J>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
6 M9 z+ x2 O* x6 L5 @8 i
& n1 O0 R. t4 ^" y6 A>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
6 _; t( r4 w6 ]>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 5 L. ~8 B  o( y# H4 k- Z2 v" h) F7 A
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand ; i" U% g+ F0 ]7 k
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
" h, H- U* P/ T! y, t$ Y* {* w! SA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
6 z9 V6 z$ N" C9 M) d) ^+ K) Glong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb5 h. ^& O! C8 O5 N/ [$ K; V
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if6 ]' B1 _# J0 S7 x% G' j- t) x4 U. s& m
the newfie would l ...
1 n4 Z8 f) M# y+ a# U! b

/ z6 ~% s) `3 y4 q" `8 [  Q  s. h: P: D* e6 \" G8 j
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
& ^6 {: x) |1 F, G, ?/ R: o“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
- x* N* h# r9 X" O7 c8 I# l好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
2 H+ ?% g4 K3 t' M( r加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

, Y/ |5 O# x# i- a真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
. P' f+ r$ x. L6 K# f% c8 i3 |5 v; d7 R6 y$ H1 O
% {0 A1 i' f) q- B* p" z7 m- ]
8 Q) h- ^: v& }) J* O3 s
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
9 A) ^: R# E, q, q* L6 ~, u4 N7 r/ U“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,4 ]* N' p& E2 I1 d
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

6 n2 I! c6 }+ o8 d3 m真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
" {$ ]0 Q) Z* ^# g& \! w# w, H
' |1 y* c( h1 G9 t真聪明,偶像啊
% a" Q& x3 o) u; c8 \
5 z. S9 `( j# o- n6 `+ t
全盘接受一下。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 + S) v7 v/ `' V

5 c3 ~9 D' L/ w$ g) H
9 N# @0 E$ N$ Z) G1 u( e) x) O% N全盘接受一下。
; L: W) u" y- u* r4 z! K
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
* s5 s5 X( z& w" v
/ R5 ^1 q6 D/ u真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
: E) _- o# ?0 |9 |& d1 j" W7 Y3 w
  B% c! i; \6 R) g/ S7 ^7 x) I

3 r7 l1 x) B8 x& l: u  Z$ n别把我往坏路上领啊。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 % ^$ W& o$ J* s5 n0 g4 _+ n9 }

$ F# a% Z1 M! J  ?$ p4 @* Z3 t& q  j, f: W( I

" P# d7 I; D1 G2 s% ~+ K" N% y别把我往坏路上领啊。

( `) s! A/ B# n( y你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
: e# V4 n9 D' u- {. ^加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

5 c9 ~6 |- I3 t6 i' R多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 " S. L0 W& Y8 `' H+ t
7 r6 p, d! A: P
真博学,偶像啊。

( D8 _& o% ]: i4 s5 R) ]2 W大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 , n$ u* K3 C* @2 |  R$ A0 |0 N! R

) p4 m4 u) x; G0 s4 c0 V大学教授哦,能不剥削?
8 W1 z4 i# @& @# _. V
她是大学教瘦?
. J- T4 W/ j( K, a- ~大学教胖还差不多 3 J1 |" r& E. e% l
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
+ Y& q  Q! R4 E1 X5 o0 b- F" t紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

& q' u) x) J0 @5 n, ?说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
. x1 t/ _5 d  }/ r紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

2 |8 P% F: \& ~. G. |8 X8 }' m2 p7 F. e$ u
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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