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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
" l4 @4 s  U) V2 T+ Vlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
) C/ T% @0 L5 ^, w3 s6 @1 Qthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
& B0 |. V7 n/ x3 \3 E- F( |0 Vthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
0 E4 e8 ?' W6 Y3 B- K1 n) f  + B  t; k/ ~: f3 H, Z
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so' Y4 l) G8 N; Y2 I8 r
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
& ?) w: J. F. I' r, I# ~ lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I. p( d& L. v" [" q9 I
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
8 s" p, b% P3 F  vyou pay me only $5. * p) T7 Q! n- Z" {1 T
+ Z& I0 Z$ _% I; L6 P
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
4 T, _! i# [5 v3 r2 C: w5 E" r will pay you $500. 3 ~- ?4 C% h& F# @7 m/ D& @

4 I8 Y8 ]+ G+ n4 { This catches the newfie's attention and to keep+ \1 r$ Q+ L9 e4 l4 k! Q
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. % [: j, \6 H- ~  b
: A. e+ ^! }0 ~& C+ Y, f7 v, r
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's& Z* ]. C0 y  O5 Q' E8 a# c% m+ ~
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
4 ?2 C+ c- j( _" I6 P% i* Q
/ B1 X1 c" H% V6 `The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his  G* Q3 c* X" z6 m) d- C
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
$ V5 e0 N1 m- D- O1 ^lawyer. 5 u- c% `" X, m. ?# K
8 B* L. b: c( a0 y% I9 r( T) R; i9 R
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
6 J6 v7 {# R( M3 I+ X, n8 V
1 j% D! o. x2 c4 R( oHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
7 t( k! j( E6 |% O6 Nthree legs, and comes down with four?'
" x. r; {  H! k* H
( y" M( E3 V! ~5 RThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
7 d; @5 @  s$ B6 O: vreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
; Q4 W. x9 o& @8 mthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
& H5 ^% Y" c7 W$ S" G7 q0 M  hof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
$ n5 D8 _$ T$ D7 @9 ohands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right% @: A$ W+ g7 E2 r
back to sleep. 6 P) C6 y: C- a- W

) I2 H1 P" }  [The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He- p3 o# `2 _# g/ z5 @+ B; Q' _; Y+ T
wakes the newfie up and asks,   j1 V( P( g6 g4 L, \# B

' P5 n! m% m* g2 w) H/ c'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
2 @7 p0 l' h. ^comes down with four?' ! y# x7 W3 q$ Z7 f, D: v6 h

/ g6 y9 ^$ }) @# u# w8 i' |The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
; R  k5 ?% J; M# B  b. rand goes back to sleep.) ]# E4 ?9 d' {

1 }( n0 |/ Z1 e" A
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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+ ]% r( {, x6 c# TLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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. E! A6 [1 |% X! g>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two ! m: q2 Z4 m* n6 Z( p+ B% S
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
% y& s: M0 Q! a7 U  ^# b% t>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
" \; ^0 r6 y! X- b/ A" ^- n) u" r>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
/ [0 o# J) s6 ]  P7 Q>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
5 {  l1 Z/ S4 K
' q' A9 }% H2 y# R>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
$ C' R+ [- |) t& A>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
7 B  Q3 C7 a! Z/ c# u; {. ?>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more   ^9 d! z# {9 I8 N! i% a+ t
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
/ Y! h+ v# b, [1 [4 ~>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
+ J7 v/ U$ k# R! q1 K" U
7 j: h7 ~7 g/ W$ ~4 c>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's & T6 ~' q' ~& W- c& C/ }. _* O
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
2 M0 Q2 _2 b6 N3 T( l; p>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
: Q* p7 l; G/ y>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
3 J+ j8 J0 W! c5 D1 j6 I6 BA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
* n8 W5 Y* b: c" |# b, slong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb) ~* S. b0 ]# G+ C; q3 b
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
/ t9 }) N3 I# c0 L; n  i. ythe newfie would l ...
& s& |: Y: k! O/ }' m* e; @
' u; d( a- e5 H$ ?& A3 m' e7 T

6 c* k  b7 X2 W$ Q" Q9 h3 P5 C好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:6 M0 Z; W0 \; ~5 f" }! o% E3 [0 Q
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
7 U. J. E* m( [7 ~% a好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
, [9 z6 m# n$ @加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

5 m) g1 |. K- B' x真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表   m" Y1 h, c" R/ G$ K- V
( P- x9 f  g( F1 Z  ?  U% A8 k

' u) y  T2 g" A. p1 N. L4 y! S4 ^9 H9 v
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:7 H1 \3 r: ^' y9 M4 M: l
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
& U& k2 \: ^$ E6 ^6 g: d好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

& F; P0 l4 \6 Z$ c3 q6 J/ C真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 # I% A" @" E( ?. x2 U; i

3 l7 }8 O: d" q6 \* d3 [/ G+ V真聪明,偶像啊
  {$ Q# d& X! \5 v+ Z& G
3 U6 y% V" i& C# I
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 2 [1 C5 n) a1 h: O
' ^3 B( R* y2 t# _. b1 V
2 L+ n3 a" R* o" u4 v- b
全盘接受一下。
' B% L9 n3 `* ^' H6 j1 E/ Y
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 - W7 L+ Y6 c: P6 D7 R" ^0 {5 a
4 O- B9 G$ {+ x3 g1 R
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
. L. z7 D* u9 Z. ~* T3 J1 f) _/ o
/ g: z) h0 x! `" \9 |7 I! g9 M
) i: W$ ?* {  n3 K+ J1 `9 g) A
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
$ x) ~( O: _! G; ~) ^+ u
; v1 C/ d2 P3 D9 Z1 i- _4 V) W/ x; W7 [2 L% l/ Y; U; _* E

* p; a1 M/ V3 `9 C别把我往坏路上领啊。

. v% e0 S  B4 E+ S6 s) ?, I& X! P你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
% x, o5 @) z: l; w* h8 X加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
' t1 T! J3 [( h+ W1 N; O$ b
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
( H0 |8 g8 ?8 d/ Q% _* G+ y# K8 m- }2 E" X3 @  j( |
真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
) C, e8 I3 R) q5 t7 Y% H8 ]
, N5 I1 |: W# B7 J+ {大学教授哦,能不剥削?

1 D# [2 I* a  C6 [8 M/ @她是大学教瘦?
- z) ~( C: `$ k3 E9 ?# R大学教胖还差不多
6 G" \' N" B& R, Z6 Z她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
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发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
5 d$ C5 H& k: x" y紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

6 p; ]% t+ Q0 ~( g: {& i说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
# c/ D# z& p5 j1 R紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
/ O4 w! h) u9 \4 ]; ]7 c

% F. t9 N/ [3 k! j9 X哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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