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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
5 K, [- O- Z1 d' A# Xlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
! r, k7 B% I. p; k( |6 nthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
( g$ X. l- R& r9 Uthe newfie would like to play a fun game. # D; r8 y0 g, ^* p  N- @& D2 \/ [9 O
  . P0 |# u5 k: ?# A2 ~0 o  z
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
$ t; @. \( l; j; q6 } he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
  P/ b0 ?/ g: j( h lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
4 z4 X" ]7 e, I; ]0 P; `. a( Uask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
" L1 C% Q+ f- p2 a- z! i! _you pay me only $5.
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( _2 V! ~* Q6 w2 P. {8 R* X You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
% t5 t& |& U: \% a+ @5 t- ~ will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
, d$ ?! F6 x5 r6 ]. s6 ]2 ]the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. * J0 ^- m; E$ J2 J; b# M; ~! ]

$ D! ?! j& Z, o6 n8 _  x5 PThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's" }) z. g/ d+ @7 {
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
0 F. L; B/ q1 \. ypocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
9 t* f, r8 S1 B6 G3 |lawyer.
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.
* H9 c/ S) }! |7 n& z
) `' ^$ c3 c" u$ e. U1 f5 ]' T: U# bHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
! |8 M2 q0 }4 V' x  `8 H* Tthree legs, and comes down with four?' , V' i! }3 e0 V& _2 \3 p; i  S, S/ U

2 S# @, f% T' j: {/ L7 VThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
5 I) ^3 m5 g$ R: @* ^( x7 o- oreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all# ]6 H2 z/ Z8 a
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
; D0 v& w7 K: d4 e* x) ]" }$ _& E6 Iof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
1 z+ X  j/ I! S$ k- j' g$ _" xhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right) L! _- o2 @  W( C- r
back to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
6 K7 @2 c+ n! }5 u4 c9 H4 S( Cwakes the newfie up and asks,
5 \+ `# b/ s) U  V  m0 ~' I; p2 I% }% ^' l$ H: @
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
" A3 V5 P& h  A" P6 D4 ycomes down with four?' 0 e0 R4 s% M+ R# o: m

0 w4 y* S1 I8 y: u; t+ nThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $52 p/ x. T0 v* @+ i, {# t; w$ A2 W
and goes back to sleep.' |  X8 L' Z) l7 L0 V5 y
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!8 F9 J! d1 E) U  W

$ ]7 h% x% R  ?- \  v% {Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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- d2 \1 Z  i7 K5 w4 u1 J& k& n- \>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
6 }) f# E3 ?1 N. u>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 6 C3 R9 i6 X& H4 T( k
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
, t& \9 x( j. S1 \9 w>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, % q. B4 G! s$ Y6 I0 y
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct: D7 `% W2 L$ K& t

5 }/ A9 b2 G" `/ g& i+ e: ^& g>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
1 I* }3 ?, A9 f# C, Q>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a , K& _- W% N" [0 I, k+ _
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
' h: K6 v! E& s>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 1 ^2 N4 ]' A1 T; y# h4 l9 Z  e
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
6 K+ ~; E4 y2 b( Z3 g* b
" Q$ F% o" T, D+ \2 U3 R>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
1 B9 c1 @' `  ]8 A. o  }>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 5 E$ L3 z. S( S0 ~# w9 n
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
# V- X8 d# @/ s3 y  ]>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
2 b5 `- {' `  W! @# d8 s$ i/ uA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
5 q) m0 X5 B8 elong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
1 p& D+ W4 M; n! P& {5 hthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if; }' n' ~. @5 j7 y
the newfie would l ...
# k) x4 a# H* A) s! y! ?+ Q" j
. p- F/ p7 _# Z4 k
  C  `: ~/ c3 ?, ]5 M# t
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
6 E/ j9 k2 U; F“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
2 b/ ^7 Y  D2 T7 r5 ~  G好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 & n& x& d. f2 F
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

6 @" m% X0 Q% d( ]( J真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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5 p' d# G* q* k9 P: Y0 [
* \" s; J, S- n9 y' R好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:* a# l$ D7 ?) ^
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,/ d2 F4 c. Q8 A( U; n; `, W* }( \
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

* E/ Y# S+ p# M, f: @- u真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
6 w6 c0 ^$ w5 `& z2 s3 `( D0 k  ?+ }
真聪明,偶像啊

+ i; Y- ?& x$ [* H# u* M% k8 O1 V$ l- y, ]. f! L7 i
全盘接受一下。
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发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
# Z0 o6 k& S, t5 B7 I3 n! j
& N8 i5 l3 ~; Q3 g* }! e, p( C
8 a/ \7 p& i! ~全盘接受一下。

. m) G- m) l9 M$ x& }! {真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
: t" z: ~. {8 n
% ?9 G0 K: t3 K3 M% m真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
( g* N: o6 k9 `1 L! G
& ^: ^, b8 s/ k1 W
/ Q1 R, U) {0 ]. O
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
$ X9 M* E& o  A. L; V) S: U5 {  K0 l; u

# R1 f' a6 q7 c/ a+ D8 K( x9 x) q  u) [
别把我往坏路上领啊。

4 m- C9 U9 P7 f. W你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 : [! d6 ~# n8 b- b' ~+ H
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

% P4 D3 y" ^8 @1 Z. f1 m7 s5 t多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
; w1 ^$ }; W/ _4 v9 l% v
( T# b7 `) Z: ]) D9 ~. X真博学,偶像啊。

. S# I% G# c6 [- a+ V" A7 p/ Z大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
1 d3 R0 i& \9 I( Q% I
' p6 u9 b( }/ V% m( v/ t" n: Y大学教授哦,能不剥削?
2 t9 o# {: H/ J! ^5 \6 D3 w9 Q5 |2 C
她是大学教瘦?5 v1 s3 A- n6 Q' G3 ^+ s  R, T
大学教胖还差不多 ) L. f9 O4 {( x' v0 r2 y& r% m
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 9 g7 z  Z  M) g; F: z* c: l
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
/ X8 `; x$ M) t( @4 f
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
& [. i: G; n/ O' A6 |0 j" C紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

$ F. @% u% E- A1 K" n& G. K
3 X8 N$ Y& S8 {: w5 J7 p$ J9 W7 q. E哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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