埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 4547|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a, p3 w& @$ ^+ o3 C) y' y
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb& K3 |0 g1 e5 F0 p3 x6 E/ L: S
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
: ^: ]! O/ r+ ]- ]8 `3 K1 Jthe newfie would like to play a fun game. * @! f! [" b; B* ^; K# M
  
2 j, T$ v: p, @6 E" s8 w/ u The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
2 o1 u. E( z  q he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
6 G- E9 p2 C2 i/ k( i lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
$ M* f# m+ C( P; x1 n5 Zask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
5 z- e" q0 Y1 |1 Dyou pay me only $5.
. ?0 ?8 j5 s" V5 p9 |  c % ]0 Q" v) [1 a! T% f
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
0 g8 M5 z- _+ Y$ k0 V( W9 Q will pay you $500. : c! m3 v' H$ q$ C

) V# g/ {) ?8 @ This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
2 W* K: E! G4 vthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
& y& w( x5 R& Q$ N0 s# g
+ P2 ^- L- n  R: I5 g& qThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
  d5 d/ K6 W) sthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' $ d0 y% A1 n) A: u7 g
! u/ A; a* u# k# z0 i. X1 P( q* q
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his7 o( f# H- d( N& d' D
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
* J% e# h0 n( _! @- W) |9 y+ rlawyer.
# `# f% T# O1 t! z4 q( M: I+ U1 H
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
! U9 t# R- g3 f2 c
; @7 H: N: n7 t# }4 b/ ]He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with" W, ]# u: \* M+ o
three legs, and comes down with four?'
9 `" m  @+ d7 A" |$ Q5 }9 P6 _5 i1 F! |1 t
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
. _) d1 h# c$ e) {3 r2 e, Rreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all; F1 f. U5 V2 B" z
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour0 B, |8 p( v4 F3 k* Z
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and+ P1 u4 S$ g7 Y! x
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
, V, d  A9 ^& x- a8 }/ ?back to sleep. 9 Y) X/ G( c  b# K' N6 Q9 Y

6 I1 G0 {* _; |8 z- XThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
3 ]9 Q2 j5 s1 L% k+ j/ g& ^8 ywakes the newfie up and asks,
$ q1 R& @* \6 j4 ?. _; d* d. J" @+ e, ^; O5 H: Y( N' O7 |6 t6 w
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
& y5 C/ \% k1 M6 D( Ecomes down with four?'
' @1 G- t# ]5 h3 ^# R* D
. x1 ~" e4 s: f- r+ rThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5$ X/ \$ \" o. e! \+ G/ W. Y
and goes back to sleep.
+ Y7 _1 u& {+ W" A/ e1 M1 [/ c* y* z/ j4 F' v8 G: X
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!8 d  H- R( b0 V5 D" W) Z

4 D+ {* D1 Q; ^Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the7 A: G; J* l# |# j% v6 R, G

3 ?9 N) w  ]4 `0 Q+ `! A# f3 o% u>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
2 x0 t' Q: Q" C. Z5 I7 R5 E3 P>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 9 I# |; [9 ?7 l. \- B, |- _3 `
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
/ @$ J. p* m0 O" l" V2 R3 L% t5 A>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
% B' F$ t  ~; [4 W$ V: y! s3 b! t>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct4 R& X) T( j; P# b7 L4 N
) f; @- H$ S" g8 c) y' s
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
3 A. {9 S1 z/ {: E- W>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a & n. V8 x0 C2 ?4 E) s
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 2 r2 B) F7 X6 o' p# J) l
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
! `( w) Y2 N6 M>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three2 p) T1 m7 J7 J$ E

% v) ]4 u; I  r; ?0 h>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's + v  ?& B. T. C  `3 L
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
7 E0 L8 r5 N9 p3 {' q* i  |" `>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand $ Z+ S0 d6 ]3 P; ~  b( D: Y
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 0 ?; s' O! _7 ?3 N) Y
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
, n" ?) g/ z$ ]/ klong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb2 |! U) b# K0 o7 p
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if  f+ U- K" x2 X8 ^
the newfie would l ...

2 d( T# |; Z$ G* q7 P% Q; M2 s- T4 h1 Q6 I& G

7 G% D: C4 x5 B) T0 o好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
4 ?9 N1 R9 m9 z& M“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
9 n# E9 H6 q( f8 U$ r好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
$ H* F4 `9 n, B( T+ E6 A' A加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
. m9 Y. K! ~. ^3 w" o3 o7 X
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
0 c7 A* J" f' b' \, o4 |1 u% q( Q* n. a% [2 N6 A0 N

5 q& b" v* q3 \1 R" s6 S' ~% m4 t
6 m  f# M) a" Z; V  C0 s1 A好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:) |3 h6 }  h% F( X4 d/ @9 h1 d
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,5 N5 Y4 @8 x( ?4 X8 f5 [4 I5 v% y
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
' V7 |# ^# u3 p5 M7 f, v$ }
真聪明,偶像啊
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
  [1 @( Z* `! A- Z
3 G/ ]: M' `/ c  a, W0 Q2 R真聪明,偶像啊
& G; t4 w& v/ y

; ]) O( N. E% }! e- ^  L5 r全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
3 C% B2 q% `! `: N% I: f( s' ?
! v. M7 C* W* ~) w0 z  M
5 Z' U( k% h; E( B! a1 _全盘接受一下。
  |2 h# }( q: t3 e
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
, c9 I/ h9 E* c& |5 m) o
# T( J9 B; J# D: M5 O8 D0 A/ f真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

5 A  b1 ?& }# B$ T) l1 k/ O) R) q4 a/ y+ m: l  m# e' h4 W0 d

; v: V+ G# s% o" h8 b别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
" `8 F, E. z4 u7 a3 B6 E" T- }0 C7 |8 E+ `5 T

" F3 \* J# s' n! f& k7 S
' ~* t4 Z0 \0 N别把我往坏路上领啊。
9 t/ G- m8 F! d, {& H! c
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
7 m8 l5 P* l: N9 h6 m3 N加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
+ g6 [6 D+ S" X; u$ x
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
, m. b2 u5 \: c/ y
; n) q7 c; P# q" y真博学,偶像啊。

* w* t4 Y& K5 e7 w. y, Q大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
7 h: ]" o( J, }* S# J
$ s' }. `- T. F9 h/ s大学教授哦,能不剥削?

1 r2 h# V  Z0 c6 a+ ~: l" H2 N她是大学教瘦?
$ D$ \3 \8 s. k; A& Z( s大学教胖还差不多
; ^! T: a6 N1 K- ?+ S她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
* \$ Q$ {- `- P- ^* \" B紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
1 b8 ?) F) w4 j( G
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
* E8 r% F5 _& q紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

! `0 o" `% n5 c% T# C! V7 S, T; p" L5 L
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-1-17 20:22 , Processed in 0.178755 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表