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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a$ E+ I3 q$ Y/ v
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
. U' m: @  J  a0 ?0 j0 ythat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
& E( L) M: L, p! g; S6 G7 g- Tthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
# h+ Y8 _0 x1 _* L% V  7 G: @4 u3 E! c' k; t6 K8 O* A7 `
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
* j, J  k, s; n8 f7 U he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
: R: M" p4 g5 p3 R' o+ g lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I1 n/ w+ `! H; M8 u
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
7 A. D3 w" f8 X0 Syou pay me only $5. ; b+ V! }0 A8 b
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
1 ?: L0 y& I, i  [5 |1 w" Q will pay you $500.
+ ?/ J& w- I; i  S* ^
2 Z7 D1 x/ q" x4 a5 @7 h- F- S This catches the newfie's attention and to keep' B* c# {. o+ L- ~7 d
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 4 U# k, S+ i2 e' }6 O- X" {+ _2 F

0 P6 a# K4 u3 L" g" y3 y5 e/ A8 b; tThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
: ~/ ~5 h6 `1 O8 _% X' x" l9 tthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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( b4 \2 K$ h2 |: [' `+ s& lThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his3 o' g2 u% K( Q# z
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
4 G$ W0 C: E8 Llawyer. 9 X) a/ [! w3 V/ p
  b/ {2 l+ O" N3 U/ s
Now, it's the newfie's turn.1 N; W; l5 V. I% y% l) v9 }9 _
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
1 A0 C4 }$ ^9 A; c4 |three legs, and comes down with four?'
, j; F+ |1 g# E, l+ L9 u
0 e3 H9 D/ G: o# y2 J' I; pThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
, o$ h$ ]; x! zreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all! Y. ^# q1 q8 Z; D7 b/ I
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
$ `, v  }9 }, N# F1 Mof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and5 l* u3 `5 p: X
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
3 L6 l. f% D$ j0 T$ v: u6 Mback to sleep. ! r3 t( C4 {' K0 ^+ C  _( \1 }4 J& i

: w. D8 d. J. q0 ?! QThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
& e/ ?! f0 D. Ywakes the newfie up and asks, $ J: n- ]5 |& R- c$ L% o" Z

7 ]6 f& ~( O7 ?4 H9 M. x'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and5 O# w) O6 [9 d0 S
comes down with four?' 5 Y; Y" c. ?" C- o

. L" ~7 [+ G2 J$ ?The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $57 |+ C1 e$ F1 V) w
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!' [4 m% z, S3 p* e2 ^0 q

1 T, ~3 n0 G2 x. \, gLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the& J' p$ O7 T7 s$ a' d
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two ) N* h- w8 `8 V) V( b
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
' W) v3 I( P) @2 j, k, `>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
2 q9 b: W) p% \" B$ V>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
  ]5 M, {9 f! ~/ C8 t% q+ @3 u) T>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct/ x- [% l5 k7 c* T5 p$ |/ X

, j0 I' R1 L. [>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
4 K8 w9 o/ f* |( N  b>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a & h1 Z- A( ~) t/ g, F/ K5 H
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
3 S% S: ^0 \- B1 j5 ]0 ~, F& E& W* h>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
$ Z7 j( O. L5 x; Z0 e( K% ?4 c" Z>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three& N/ G2 O, F- U  H% |$ r- q
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ' @2 R' \' K; U4 _& b$ r5 ?
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
( z* H- j9 [3 A* N4 ?( `>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 0 H0 ?' a9 n9 }* X5 a) w
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表   b' K6 X1 A& g
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
$ i% ]! m% b. d* [6 s! [. d# Rlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
$ |4 Y, _8 M$ C3 qthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
; C5 V# p) b1 F! ^0 G& z2 Pthe newfie would l ...

. ~0 Q+ F5 `1 M* e: q6 ~8 K
  [9 ~2 s; q8 x" d" a3 _6 n+ ?1 N' C: N2 W& y0 |2 C
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:' h2 i) a5 q+ f2 v
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,2 S: ]# u0 P4 Q% j7 Q$ i
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ' H" }3 p; B4 S' \) A
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 , @1 z7 C) E) O
. M1 W; H4 x2 F+ O

, H$ m+ s5 J8 _: r/ J' k$ y
; Q. }# `$ q2 I$ K好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
$ D" r* c$ t( Q" P7 Z2 c“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
: K# |: \& p( n  e好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
( H  o* Z/ e3 e: w0 V0 W5 k
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
8 @/ L: ~+ Q! ]% C( c
8 T% b/ A  F$ g! ]0 @, M真聪明,偶像啊
6 {" z  Z: B% k

/ o: W) N# F' w* A6 S# s( n全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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0 d" h8 ?9 \# T% G$ ]7 O' x* L* d! T) J' R
全盘接受一下。

! n( q; w' g+ g1 x4 Y真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 8 W# q7 r2 s$ ~& i
3 C# k4 f# G: ^5 c( s6 a
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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+ [9 ]  a9 V5 k' y$ B* [
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ) m2 k0 N; |" v' o

" ~5 x1 ^" y! \. W0 @+ g5 ~0 k$ H. ~  p, L* @
/ _! {, l$ J) ?
别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 4 O- O' j  _! q( H7 C
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

: o* x4 B" X$ A% D, @2 _多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 # U. N) e/ \' @6 K7 Y+ V% G: d9 ~* K
, K1 Q7 R& i. A
真博学,偶像啊。

9 `3 \" j/ V( l. Y1 W& A$ |7 D4 s: o大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 7 ?# B' z+ a2 d- s; E) J

2 O& u1 Y! K; k- f* [3 @/ m大学教授哦,能不剥削?

. M; p# l$ ?3 x4 M* t  @& `4 o5 O她是大学教瘦?5 R, X' v8 `. ^
大学教胖还差不多
! _2 }) z( v( v2 V; J% V" |' @她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
- i# H" ^1 j% A4 G3 U. M5 J/ c3 O紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

$ M2 l0 r, \' K, u8 n说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
+ B5 R, U1 o% t3 J7 w* p' A) _紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
9 r: z2 Q# s! H: c

% N$ E& ^) N! q# h& w# l- t哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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