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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a3 v" ]$ p: l$ w$ \% k9 h% d; t' m' u
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
# b0 L* ^1 K' jthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if3 n) r" {3 K6 A8 R* \6 U
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
! S& f5 H1 v0 v: c1 D+ e' I  
+ x4 G7 g8 m+ u( J The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so6 L- y; _/ G, G4 g& |& k
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
& B$ ^. H9 j& n2 @  T$ v& N lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
/ Q- F; x( [5 E9 p5 K8 [& \ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,+ L* p, j% S6 ?9 t$ E: B' B' Z
you pay me only $5. 5 {; f: {; o5 c% n( y+ L
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
' k* ^7 o7 Y) n* J will pay you $500. & n! _, n6 e4 a) e7 O' N' {
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
+ O/ ]2 s9 B9 h# K; \% s' X% J6 wthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. - s* p( j7 ~2 R. Q; d1 X

* k) O6 k% N3 tThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
0 I' d" a1 l& ~! Sthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ; E* m2 {* ]/ t3 W  p/ h; u
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
4 f0 ]; k5 m5 B' e1 G/ B5 ypocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the9 i9 o1 y3 F* C3 b3 x/ A
lawyer.
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' K" B, T, P8 ^  N9 zNow, it's the newfie's turn.
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! Y, T0 i& e% v# w( @2 I! `1 iHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with' G2 g  I& _5 n8 b
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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1 O8 T2 y! J8 S. d7 K5 M4 A1 `The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
- M  ], G# Y0 E9 ]: D9 c4 N, kreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all: W# u4 I$ n; k" L% L0 Q
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour8 B$ h3 B2 S2 C+ h) M* @" V& ^! U
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and6 [  L( O) h, N1 R% q
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right3 h  c2 b; ~' X& A% ^- K+ r  c
back to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He$ J8 h* G! H' n6 P0 r$ ~5 E
wakes the newfie up and asks, * v; \$ K9 p1 V! \! z7 i. z

3 [) _3 Q+ f+ p# U& ^2 C' \'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and( ^: A% E' g( v' t. k
comes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5) W( }) g% D% Z
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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: V0 ~( {2 a5 B5 o; h8 V! K>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two # {( x7 w" t4 j) U/ i% z6 R: m6 ^
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
% I2 n2 j8 i/ _$ J1 d$ b7 s7 w+ S6 h, g! }>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the / e/ D# Z+ o: x! k
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
7 z4 g5 Y# c$ w& A  Q>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct0 U$ O% @, p: d9 M$ K3 W' q

# R* U8 Y. @/ a9 T9 n" L>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research / C& w* y3 Y/ Q, [
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
5 p  @% M% X! P" I2 H>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
' i9 J! u, k4 Q2 t" b6 j& @>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
' Q/ \0 C* M& w4 D2 L# f! O  }  W4 D>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
3 n9 B& L$ v: c: z$ g7 Z>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the " c1 x! ~3 v$ E3 y  `0 V6 o
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 6 c6 b% a: [+ y* C1 j5 L
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 , t$ ^; ]/ m' \5 J( s* M
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
" g' a% M) _4 R5 vlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb% s& ]' `- e- D# z" G1 w7 I
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if' t9 V, e1 J0 m% e2 E4 H. {5 Y) {
the newfie would l ...

8 K1 u$ f) R* ]
/ Y2 C: ^, O- a* h5 S5 B( x- w
1 L; O' i7 J$ d, l好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
; _6 G) _8 F8 u- S; k7 o4 i“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“," Q" W5 ]% O2 R3 M3 K7 i
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
* t1 `6 B6 F: @+ y" ~加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

, J4 F5 H; X$ U( a/ V真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 , D5 Y& H# h- e

1 ], S1 |; p, C( O" i8 L6 L
8 b0 u7 z. g: ?, ^8 h; R* Y' V; L. E) I, x; p/ L& G3 v- N/ M9 a
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
' i' Y0 Z6 i% p2 m: N) M! K) m“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
% q9 p# g/ R' G! v/ Z5 [% A好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

' l8 D: S! ]) G" }2 }# K真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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6 v4 U4 r" n9 F1 T4 I# _2 F真聪明,偶像啊
. T5 D, f! @# W4 A8 b

+ _# w! ]: B% }/ l9 Z全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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8 ?! h0 a& K; F$ H( T) |
全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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+ g) |+ q4 T8 V. `0 d真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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4 X* Y6 n9 [& }; G% A0 A+ F/ k! a- r- u8 O: v
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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6 Z6 C4 P" e' i) x/ `) a9 n% C) s, a& e% d; d

/ J# H* ~- f  y3 t, y+ X4 J别把我往坏路上领啊。

) k" z9 H9 @, T$ D你已经在路上了
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ( b1 X# X% `! p  S
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

: \& A7 N; P4 U5 C7 J多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ( y  A9 r1 ^) T! H7 U; i- f
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真博学,偶像啊。
  f& _7 e/ K6 n4 ?
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 % L  {% o* V, C9 Y
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?
' o% M( f) k+ M$ N3 {* P大学教胖还差不多
! B! m3 k7 w2 W! ~& k$ H她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
' q. x; ~- t, t8 c% F8 s. }9 U6 u8 g紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

, P* c4 v7 e% V说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
( _' G9 R9 S, F% E紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
6 j/ H2 S" Q, \: K

1 T3 x& b" k; J) O$ T$ L. [哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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