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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a) G2 [7 B' q2 `' I. T; J# n
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
9 o% y/ D( w8 c( j7 U7 _that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
) {; i4 M7 T8 E/ P5 dthe newfie would like to play a fun game. 4 D4 F6 I3 D/ q. J3 d
  4 d& G4 c. Q- d; K; L9 r8 `+ z
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
% {' l5 t7 ^# k/ d9 } he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
- F8 h% e8 O0 g0 q lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
6 ~- }, t* U- [, s6 `9 ?ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,# U6 h9 h/ c" h( G
you pay me only $5. 5 D. p- h) p2 o- Z4 ?5 b" A6 y
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
2 _1 x6 U6 G  Q( a# m will pay you $500.
: g7 i2 ^' v7 [
+ R6 \. Y* T6 q! ?! J" V This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
# ~# q4 e1 M! O9 @- Ythe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
7 z1 f+ `& p/ ?  k5 T% E1 T& Y( a: D4 V0 Q& H8 {
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
2 x0 A$ Z+ w8 a% \6 x$ g- ?5 jthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
6 A  t3 i9 E! u( v; {, C4 E: {8 j% H3 S- T
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
+ c# l2 \& L1 _! R3 v2 b" T8 k- Zpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
) z& X3 M! y9 M- `. s8 Tlawyer. 5 W- r1 p; X' E  U/ l; i
, J9 d4 H. t* S* k
Now, it's the newfie's turn.6 l! `4 ^$ D$ B6 l
7 O9 {: R$ r. m) w% M5 y
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
. X4 m9 t" @1 T% l7 V) P. W. T2 p. c9 gthree legs, and comes down with four?' ( b$ ?, \' @6 f5 {7 ]: B9 m! w
, A' p' j) t! i" Q+ o( I
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all( o# k; s, R+ g7 W
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
" W, J  b. r  ^: G. Gthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour+ g' `1 s0 i# u# D
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
: {4 x8 y+ s) Q! Ahands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right( {$ ]' e; L" Z  l
back to sleep.
" c9 T% y. r) O- k; g2 n  J+ x8 |2 |9 y
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
" {+ F! O* U' g% D5 @2 owakes the newfie up and asks, ( i' g4 L1 U0 u1 _" F/ n/ l6 n

! C3 z2 A* q2 \2 W" @'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and& W8 C! t- }2 L: Z3 J! A8 P$ V7 a
comes down with four?' " e# Q# l$ `; Y& D, r! r  Y9 o( i

/ w4 U' v% ?6 g. W2 \; {The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
! |5 \% L. j! f: vand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!1 ]7 c) e8 z$ z( L) I7 J3 T

- A  J5 M# P) c% W4 \' {8 RLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the; k/ R% b: ^9 @0 G0 q$ Y+ q
8 D7 K& W0 w- ?5 S3 q! @5 |' m
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
1 c# c  X/ b& Y5 S1 G>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
5 `4 _7 `) a0 u* P# Z>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
# a! b; ?5 `( z; ~( B7 J6 h& C>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ' q0 A; a, l# ]% G# w, c4 ^9 u. R
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
* ?2 x' {; d7 V+ @4 A: G, I% c; H# ~& w5 P- S* q& w  w
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
8 y- N. Y0 a4 q/ D>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
% Y2 t  g4 D4 c>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
: v% H% K8 D0 V- |& @! P8 i6 u& H>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 3 P7 S4 V7 V* V4 D9 {9 K
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three/ @. }/ f7 ~& `# p
/ D& e0 e6 n$ w  {, v3 h1 w% j1 e  U3 s
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ' k' x6 j# h% C; E8 @3 Z  R  h
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
5 F( I9 ~) N9 u>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 7 D7 T/ H& h5 W+ m: q! ~& \' W
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
4 Y1 `" t& w  KA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a8 }1 e/ A2 i- [  ?8 W
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb7 {, M2 z: ~9 w# l6 B, b
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
' t$ D/ V/ I2 |$ d8 e) ]& _the newfie would l ...

2 T' U* {0 Q: p. m. z# O* @" o. [5 k. {: F! x

$ T- @+ c: i& H' C* O好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
& n* n# B# }: F! V4 y& L# E“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,7 ^$ o) D, i/ Z+ N" U3 K  V3 z, L
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
4 s. C- T) Y8 P( L* V8 ?" k加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

) E. e! ]4 {* ]真博学,偶像啊。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 4 K- M. \9 ]8 D

" f* B( j( H' W  B
9 @+ i; U; Q% A0 k2 W3 B) u+ {& |) P' O, X
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:' I' L0 U8 x) A% s) K$ ^
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
$ v0 z0 S0 u3 ?% r2 ?5 e2 ?好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

' n% E$ w% T4 D( I5 G! b真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 1 [- B3 X, B5 F

0 X! T: a: B0 y* j: y4 _7 z真聪明,偶像啊

: }3 P8 c. \" M; y4 q& ?* r  z9 N6 u( _" s! r  r5 w3 v
全盘接受一下。
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发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
9 G: }2 C2 c- i' `9 D! b' h5 _
# @: J) A7 E2 P4 T; @% ~# h: h5 _2 l& T7 D
全盘接受一下。

8 N" e# u) o- u! E8 k% ?真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 * U! G+ k) E1 Y4 s% r0 E2 Y

  D- M0 a0 [* d' K+ h8 k真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
9 ^: I$ V* L1 ~% l* V9 o  A

9 P4 J% p* _0 f0 h3 J. q9 _, Q9 q- f4 d! P* ?
别把我往坏路上领啊。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 * |+ [! h7 y3 w4 O6 U
( f9 Q3 k. x& l& G" U2 f$ f8 f
5 q2 q6 s! e/ S: |6 t8 n: R
. U! ?( ]% ?) Z# I0 x$ K
别把我往坏路上领啊。
* f% A6 _, S% ~8 l0 U$ M0 c6 m
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 4 T; x* [6 k' _% {$ x  h5 d
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
/ s9 `- Q. I8 _7 t
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
1 l8 h& l) w. d% q( K" K9 B4 `, e. k2 O6 p/ S  S
真博学,偶像啊。

* R9 a1 G" P; |! b8 c. Z大学教授哦,能不剥削?
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表   L  M/ X" b+ _7 q4 Y, S

: r# D) X/ Q4 G2 s" j大学教授哦,能不剥削?

& H/ |/ [4 R$ T4 |她是大学教瘦?9 S8 w3 v6 [  @5 |  c7 p
大学教胖还差不多 / ]3 X+ {, @$ ]8 B5 R( E3 F5 x
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
9 R& b! q3 ]" L! S紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
+ L+ v# A( }# D( |9 f
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 3 ~$ ^' r1 Q5 \) r8 K
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

4 B$ O: L* n- q& |6 n7 Z1 p2 h* H4 R5 S. I1 a; A! Q+ b7 V
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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