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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a* F! A! B; x. ]1 |
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb( T2 i3 J4 z) V& U+ I# O7 P5 V
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if  `  g- ~  ?8 D' F1 F: N
the newfie would like to play a fun game. " p6 ]! Q; ~2 e1 s
  9 p& w; _7 G! N
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so! d7 |9 ^2 n" t* P- [0 c7 v4 ^2 b
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The8 D7 H% G, N3 w/ i( E( O8 b% _
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I' A& J+ I! y4 K$ V: E: p
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,: T- }! s5 p( Z5 p% I
you pay me only $5.
6 h5 O4 r* H; U1 ~ 6 a; R! W( i# i9 G; m: K
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
* m% y. _2 t1 U6 X will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
. n5 F7 ?# K/ K& z& k! n5 ~* Sthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
* n2 ]4 j+ h$ e
- R5 M: h: j; V! d4 U* P. XThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
: R# D8 N$ U' n5 \% |# W/ D( Zthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
+ v: n5 P" a5 o, ~& Tpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
( U- Z( |$ D0 [) xlawyer. 0 v- B; H( P! B- I4 f) @/ V. B

: C6 i; b+ v% q, b' I; S0 x1 XNow, it's the newfie's turn.
3 w% z" x  g4 D  k9 S; m
! p# T8 c) P0 x  h1 B& J  q+ KHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
1 T, L- P6 w% v' O& X2 M# Mthree legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
" R$ ^; q: n3 ?: {4 H5 Hreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
! r/ i; j' |" e' w# |the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
  a: @( F2 C. Y! Cof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
0 ^% `$ m" z3 `2 P, Khands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
: V5 X; O6 T4 `3 Sback to sleep. ' I! n: a) W; ?% t! M  q: W

* V& [) |3 O" mThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He5 Q. _, j3 c8 n' ~/ g1 r
wakes the newfie up and asks, / o  A2 p  E8 G0 C8 J  }

- T" q: O% S% w4 E( p'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and1 g3 L9 y. @! Y, O  x
comes down with four?'
! t0 ]: t) C! i8 s) k3 A. [
) W! B; |2 y# W0 j# |4 BThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
7 {8 s: p; x4 T4 L& @. D, t" g8 {and goes back to sleep.; {8 C" I) ~  \4 z+ s3 d

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!4 e. @0 H# l5 m/ z3 C# Z
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the# L1 j5 q1 `0 z! A
# C7 u3 ~7 ~- W9 a# y" z! x4 A
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
" @; B, r8 p5 l& a5 O3 \5 S7 N. G>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 6 u3 ^. C! J9 g/ z3 v
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the : y7 p! D7 M  \. K
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
% l* \8 P4 X7 G1 f+ [. F7 C>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct& S' A8 l7 X! u# s0 F( a
4 O1 {8 u: N) r5 T  }; m# ]
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
$ |; k% e7 U& e3 v>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
; m; S9 Q7 X6 R6 u7 [>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
1 d$ A' H% K7 E& Q( C>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 4 L9 m$ R+ D- V: A% B  h
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
" |( @7 F" u! P+ E& U7 L2 `7 g: M8 ^; i1 B$ c* Q" ?
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's   F( Y% E( J0 R) S
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the . @% S3 @" M* f% Y: c" I. m2 n
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
: f' C8 N$ p+ o0 k$ \* w* A# e+ ^>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
6 v. N  P' [  [1 _A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
. f. F0 f# \4 T& ~. ^. j: z/ i' mlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb6 f; Q; M, I9 y+ M6 W( H
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
& J( z3 f, U: \) b. Ythe newfie would l ...
' Y$ n# h" d1 K$ M9 Q1 V: `

! N9 d* {5 {+ l/ L; `, |  J# ]' C. Y0 }% d+ I
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
- J5 h" N+ c" `# x3 o“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,) G9 G+ P: y5 C% x2 z
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 6 Y' R. n. L5 x" ?; z! q
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

) O1 H2 @2 }# D真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 3 ^- K! h! E9 D. `1 k0 r  m

; t' y6 N# I* |
# |/ I5 T7 y! O! N' R
2 i! @9 J  E7 Q0 J好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
9 D) |3 _' n$ N“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,9 j/ T% U" C( o7 p8 }9 C
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
& j$ r4 h  j( h* g
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
: M& u; X4 Z& j5 [+ C
3 [+ M* l8 J7 ]* _7 u5 n7 f真聪明,偶像啊
8 M, n7 b- y* K$ r4 W/ Y" s

( D# {# V2 e$ i7 y全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
* i+ r. ^4 ]& G6 \- m2 P5 v, a3 ?6 K, r- c. x/ F
! X/ ]" ?( x  ~: X: D/ |4 w
全盘接受一下。

$ K4 h! Y5 o6 r7 k9 K真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 - }- [6 ~2 Y/ P  N7 @" C! T

5 W- ~+ ?2 ]- V* V$ w0 G真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

7 b! ]6 x) H$ b* `5 U% V, |2 f, U) U" E' t# s

: ~5 P0 s' X+ H3 I9 l, `别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 % k( o& Y) Z3 e( ^& ]9 W

& [1 m0 g- E; V5 {1 c  V
! o% I$ \1 j4 j/ y% s3 b; H, W8 }+ }" r0 ^4 s4 |
别把我往坏路上领啊。

. u) O3 [- R1 \8 O你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ' C. ~5 s3 f3 b
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

/ G! h% C. a; S$ C( f多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
; S( b. |7 G3 @
1 a+ M1 @; k( V% y& V/ h, ]$ Z) g真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

# Y! j7 B0 F& M# I她是大学教瘦?
9 r* V, P0 T6 H大学教胖还差不多 ; y2 L2 B: X; f" ^' G  N0 M
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
' M6 T3 @" B+ z2 X: e) c( Q3 Q& Y紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
: A- m% s  U# n+ L8 j
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 4 G' q, I4 s% P$ M' {
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
' j% [0 l  e: M: P4 w7 H2 C( z
: ^/ P6 z# E/ j& H4 V9 D; @
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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