埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 5279|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a3 v) `! P8 X2 R, X; N) Y' z. y
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
- f2 ^# z8 y3 u; p3 nthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if! A' e" F2 F; A2 \) g
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
( g* l" X) J* X4 C) j1 f  ' l7 \: v' a1 A: w
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
$ H: J% W/ r$ N! t he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The) H9 p5 K3 y1 o2 [! N
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
; |* W9 A/ m5 d# T/ f. Task you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
. E' q$ R+ d7 lyou pay me only $5.
+ K- [) Q9 J- l8 x$ ~3 r0 J ) Q2 a3 I! ^  N4 A3 H. z
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I2 e: e& r  W/ t
will pay you $500. + ]8 w: ~& ], [8 r

* c" H. b. D! d8 |+ X This catches the newfie's attention and to keep5 `* ?$ ]9 \* {
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
0 K+ M1 ~* N6 F, p* r$ I+ r6 E9 W. @9 V/ a+ R
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's6 _7 ?$ e/ v  i/ ]2 I
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' * c- A# O. J; i. x* o4 K; b
2 ]! b4 Q" y9 F5 Q' W  A, A
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his7 A+ f1 }* k3 k  C+ S5 c- P$ P
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
" m! u& i: Z7 ?* W4 T- f1 B! }lawyer.
( y. N1 S2 {0 v& a- e* F, E% `
2 l9 D* |+ q. j/ T" B! qNow, it's the newfie's turn.; B' H' |$ I" y; r% r

2 d0 O! N2 s+ RHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with3 O. H" {2 R2 \& a+ J2 r) y  L
three legs, and comes down with four?'
6 t5 L6 i3 z* b6 V/ W! Z* }
& p5 X# X4 _% HThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all+ X: B" u8 ?6 s5 e6 o2 h5 O* f6 }
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all2 a+ r2 J4 K" R2 o. g* @) O) x
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
2 Q1 L4 z& m+ @0 [- x, n6 w2 nof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
" B. L3 A: |8 V/ B+ m; Lhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right( p. f7 M" h* w- M
back to sleep.
8 v# N' E" ]9 P2 _8 W3 J2 f0 t+ v# Q3 }! T: g% W- z( j
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
4 v+ z/ y; B: C3 d5 Iwakes the newfie up and asks, ' f: T" _$ N9 r/ L6 n0 S

  y, V' k. G6 k6 H: X; K'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
- o" c5 V2 g0 w, H6 p' r4 ncomes down with four?' 8 f! |4 t, }. [  m$ P3 z" w

3 O  c( p6 r! u) w+ q) ^The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5# R2 F' {+ s6 K
and goes back to sleep.
) g* i1 G1 {9 H8 \. t6 }# h3 }4 ?
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!' r$ v* n& s( c$ f$ u

3 E' H7 f. C  ~Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
5 g( F# Z# R4 w- L
4 `# Y9 ~) q+ k' M7 ^' I>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two ! u! t9 I, e3 q
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
' F  Q; Q8 m% B2 r1 a' W: m% M>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
% C6 Y/ [9 i' I% w! I  y>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, , ?: e/ [4 j* W7 V6 W3 b  `
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct, U# b3 E2 }  @9 A4 u5 o
1 N& {9 n( |1 [/ X& I0 b3 \
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
# ]6 B+ M( m" \>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
6 p  {. @" n8 i>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
0 o8 L; @  l! N( C! G/ A>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
4 h! d) j6 V* _: M  Q! i- _>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
# \3 N, x  C9 G9 z7 |0 R: |( E" Y( v
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ' v2 q7 M+ J1 q2 K, r0 q6 E
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
& ^6 U% g: f7 s1 s+ c7 f' O>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
2 s2 z6 e, O' x/ s% J1 D>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
" L7 Q9 u. V, _. P- vA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
0 {0 g6 X* P2 Llong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
" d1 N3 a. ]) \4 U7 L1 i) Cthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if, d5 V  G6 y* }3 d- ?
the newfie would l ...
2 Z5 b: B, r0 x6 U; b0 ], |

" D3 r4 i9 t+ k4 c
1 n5 ^1 m3 {6 c$ T, C好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:1 D; M6 [$ o! N. U$ E! M7 y
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,1 f2 ]+ F( `* g
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
9 R( r: K. B/ t0 y+ Q1 y加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

3 Y5 t. Y# ^& S8 `真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
: o7 y5 a) V5 l3 I4 [4 I7 i; l8 L( i
* H; H/ s1 W4 d6 T4 E

5 a) O0 V8 ^% l& L好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
- h: n6 F3 L' h& N. X# P1 C“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,4 M  c& D7 O8 L
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

+ i$ v* J1 {: Z; l真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 9 C. T' ]3 P5 F
! @& V9 E; J! K# L, t: n4 X0 w7 ]7 P
真聪明,偶像啊

* p4 W5 W0 ?2 S9 L! L' f. b1 V+ V2 A7 q, n& S; j
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
$ u) A2 \+ K) q' L8 D9 x4 w" X4 O7 F+ j+ ]4 N6 J; O$ g
5 H& v8 U; p8 N+ ^4 e4 `
全盘接受一下。
8 J4 X2 \: x% u" S% a7 s' M! O- ~
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
* c* J, n& r, \
, z4 I2 V6 b7 v( a9 f3 [1 Q真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
7 \5 J( u: f! w. j$ g
0 L' z0 A/ o: o4 p
) X; W7 n7 X% Z$ g: D' ~$ x
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
; T; c2 k# K  x7 J& o; _  g7 o; S! `5 O+ K( h3 k( B' D

) y4 [+ N; l( d8 Y1 z/ c
0 v. l. f9 F9 O别把我往坏路上领啊。
% u% |7 u, {4 y4 V9 d2 J
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 1 ~0 E8 h9 m- e0 p$ E  c
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
8 }( m" f) z. ~# @
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
) h! E0 C/ m0 G5 K9 T
  E* `( i6 Z& o2 T: f$ s+ b7 L真博学,偶像啊。

$ u; Q9 Z7 Y0 y% u" w大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表   t+ I6 I3 a# s' \3 j8 ~. r7 w% t

6 x" _4 V; v# I8 }大学教授哦,能不剥削?
" }# M  z) p$ f
她是大学教瘦?
) x5 s* t* @! }$ t( U* B3 R9 l+ G大学教胖还差不多
( d8 g0 R8 e# V5 b& F. j她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 / z* S  J. \5 n- T+ I2 ]
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
" t/ _6 i1 f1 r0 R
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
$ c2 i: u% L9 W$ Y紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
# V- O2 q, B7 B8 V2 X' r( i- @
+ e4 ^" }) [0 I4 @3 ?
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-5-5 08:00 , Processed in 0.256859 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表