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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a* W) C. S: J0 C
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb  g6 _; q2 e. |( [/ C* a7 H% Y9 I4 U
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if3 Q9 Z9 u7 D1 w% V( F/ n
the newfie would like to play a fun game. 1 N4 L9 d. {6 ?) _! q! j
  
* e- M1 e, b. a. D6 B The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
8 W5 _! B4 ?% T1 S3 D+ a he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The2 i& ]  L" {4 k& M8 j& ?
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
) {5 g  k, H0 t! gask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,1 C) N3 u/ F1 e7 V* C5 b; W4 ]. X* }
you pay me only $5. 5 _, H( a8 C' e: E1 o0 j

& i  c; X" G( W- d You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
; J$ h$ a3 x! K( W' U will pay you $500. 3 z* d8 Z% N' p4 ^! R& ]+ ]

2 h3 b! M8 H# o3 u This catches the newfie's attention and to keep3 n: p9 k% B% l( m) V1 m
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
3 `! @" g# u0 r- n. {9 L- [9 s8 L
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's& m" I* S* ?$ V! k# c4 T: e" X7 R
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
7 Q' q1 }" a' H5 W3 e9 N3 Hpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
. {0 W. X+ z+ elawyer. 0 L* l, K6 ~7 e* t

2 f' R& q* ?# |; b, H& pNow, it's the newfie's turn.
# {- i( @# z- I% q% I* s5 R
, l# Q  @6 [' r" aHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
" j, C. K2 U/ h7 c) N" M- dthree legs, and comes down with four?' 8 ]2 ^4 r7 |3 p7 L" b

& U; a/ R% A$ d7 O! L$ FThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all5 [: o7 ^/ I- B2 q
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all0 d; p) A- Y" Q# N+ E
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
3 }0 O% o4 t. Y: k! X7 @' @* S( tof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
/ s  ]: f; N3 Jhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right; u% h! \! f! S$ z7 N8 [( y
back to sleep. 4 S0 q9 u: Z- S: `* t0 e

$ M+ e0 w3 Q0 ]! M6 ^3 S1 @7 bThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He' s! ?8 J5 o% u! W, y* X
wakes the newfie up and asks,
1 s6 _' i, @/ H0 K3 @
' A: |$ I) D2 G, M. b7 p( R'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and9 f% C7 Y1 W; y$ ^
comes down with four?' # l* o# T  }2 a1 J. D

, u. d6 ~; t) V0 [The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $59 N. I0 P1 y6 M; W6 K  K
and goes back to sleep.
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4 T0 h; ?. R2 @2 B% p+ ^
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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0 s9 N* H' F3 F) R+ }+ ^+ f>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
: Q2 A1 n7 @7 L) t>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
6 G; [1 i5 p  o1 D>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the 5 U$ b$ P6 i& I
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 5 v1 U* r* `* {0 s7 S7 I2 p& c
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct. s- _7 r) i4 Q. g& q1 w. Q
4 }; k1 o, E0 y* I
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
& G9 o7 D, x; I1 @>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
8 G6 `# h& S5 ]$ \( q3 m>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more   ^1 [7 ^& i- }3 m
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
! ]: ]1 p; s& ~>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three9 Y' x( s- ?/ ^: V8 T
. b3 s" c+ e# C5 d! `& ]. K1 t8 r
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ( u$ y" n2 ^6 R% L6 z
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the ; n; F+ N- A" A6 T
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
' p# W. _% k7 a* f>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
1 V0 l4 l: F/ K& q/ V, S- c2 RA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a$ h- G$ J$ Q" J# J1 T& g
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
7 @) B' x$ J& Nthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
2 ?1 a4 t: u) L  H2 C1 wthe newfie would l ...

" q4 d+ p# H8 q4 N4 L2 d. q; W7 H2 h& R% Q, N

" {8 A  ?! A- E2 Y+ _好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:; v2 i/ Y6 a6 P3 X6 l0 p
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,+ M+ g' f8 u6 w! K8 z) V. t0 y3 @
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
- f: D. W& c7 L2 }5 |加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

8 I: b$ B) C1 }  [5 _4 R$ [真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
! }/ r0 I. ?, [' f( E5 T  o" l) E& L) n% x" s

4 O( F" }$ [! j# G; g* S8 c
+ Q+ f; G- G( _0 A- j* F$ m) _好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
; x7 N& ~) u5 V7 W2 A“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
8 B, @& j8 P7 B9 H  j# i& I4 |好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

3 t  d' _3 l% h& I7 o$ O# D# Z真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 # @4 g: p9 R' i* y" M# l; Q
8 q1 s# d' z- M# n# D" y
真聪明,偶像啊
% j2 [- D9 I: U* d4 F( f

  x7 J3 a) f7 P% }/ A全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
+ @7 E* u# m' L) C
/ k, F( N; L0 e! j
: b8 \. U# J* k& q1 \) e0 A全盘接受一下。

! k0 F. R% |4 W1 x真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
3 o, m# ^3 s. T0 r, h  b, r, o+ _9 F8 _( w( B7 }7 }5 ?& {+ L
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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" D% g3 l9 D' K+ W0 h1 M' T* n7 W2 _7 V2 U) c5 ]
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表   h6 n2 k' }+ ^3 ?0 b) [
( u6 z) E! q7 k# g

" {, N) F6 s* G+ B3 W( X* W
# X- q3 O& y$ W/ G" a别把我往坏路上领啊。

" o- c- ^) b' L' a) R; R- L你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
% ?# z* y6 F% v# r' V3 B& m加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
1 a% T4 ~! y0 J  v7 g) i7 Y- f9 c) V
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ) }& s4 g' G/ Y; z4 K% x# q2 h! u

5 J5 Z6 \% M( X% o真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ) H8 T& m7 w- ^% p) }

# ~9 G7 s$ b: f大学教授哦,能不剥削?

" g8 Y3 Y3 G" N+ L1 \! l7 \她是大学教瘦?; ^* J# Z" b% m/ ^/ }6 O: e! w
大学教胖还差不多 . \' s+ V; ^, [. E8 _
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
+ O, X1 c9 w% ?9 c* m8 D; N紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

& X+ J1 c, N/ ~: x3 t说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 2 y8 }1 z- Q) p9 n
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
# t4 s. \6 V* P# r7 u

+ E1 p; H, L8 G# i2 K5 S哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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