埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 5110|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
: M3 o4 E' O7 N( \  r" {& I# Hlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
# w3 B4 S2 ]; ]; pthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
( [  O) i, W  L% Pthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
% F8 k$ }) k% a3 N. m  
, I+ f3 G# [( E1 t8 h* ?4 R! o( e The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
9 M6 B+ `1 s0 _! l7 v he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The; n7 `; I0 }+ C: U1 U- R
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I. @+ u# F6 w2 L) W% M6 d0 V6 {
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,$ j. w6 X6 G9 ~5 Z+ ^9 H$ u
you pay me only $5. $ t/ K  K- r% m8 ^' {
. C3 p. Q( r( W1 r/ ~
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
6 ~0 J- }1 K# ~4 x1 ~  i will pay you $500. 4 _) s# e+ t: ?2 K* c" [, _9 ?0 `

6 A- S$ Z; x5 A0 F& d+ \+ d This catches the newfie's attention and to keep9 X, W( o/ ~2 o, F1 V1 A
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 1 Z7 n& y. d3 b( y9 o! b! O& p# p# b7 j

( M3 i* D  k( m! ^, @; OThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
( _& a  ^6 u$ I6 Vthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
( f- ], ]/ [6 j5 {1 w& `; a; Y
5 f# p; f7 C  x2 u" ^) WThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his% F  ^5 u) K! f: L& u
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
4 @& y: W5 S3 g6 {2 G) f6 u$ T5 Ulawyer. ! {9 ?0 }! I& ?6 D  `: i) z: b

' w8 U3 s5 Y& u# K% nNow, it's the newfie's turn.
  H% b/ k1 `& x6 u* E, P" {# l$ e5 ^* B$ @/ f! |' _2 T
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
- t) T. F5 j* [1 Dthree legs, and comes down with four?'
8 Y8 ~2 U+ U2 J1 M! v
! a+ N' u0 f& b6 V1 B5 R( MThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
( k! n* i( R& L; M4 R' L3 q7 {3 e/ Breferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
& C3 D, Z4 H: ?5 l) j/ Lthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour* r, v- ~7 ~% _" y  T" U
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and; v* A- r2 X$ J. \' z  s8 L: Z& d
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right6 e/ v$ L1 P7 b9 b4 o, i) ?: |
back to sleep.
/ j9 W5 t$ W9 j: K% n$ t& ]2 t* F1 [$ F: s. Z
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
9 T5 a: R! F2 z. D! q/ v4 s5 H! fwakes the newfie up and asks,
/ ]3 Q- D6 o! [/ A$ c3 R7 j8 m/ \4 o
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
, g% o1 ?% l- f; @4 W2 \comes down with four?'
& ^7 J+ R/ U& z* G+ Z
! ?0 w, W' _, FThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
$ j5 A6 W6 Q4 S+ j/ Kand goes back to sleep.7 c2 ?& ^/ N) }! z+ J

; W" V" k+ u* d7 W% j8 I1 _# B# V' T
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
& o  a5 D* X9 R' y7 r0 _& K6 U2 N& M0 q- ?  a
Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
1 O" |+ [" ^6 o, W' t& E# v3 O7 @- ~' m' K  K
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two * d% c$ c, g% p; j  ?
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason * p2 h. W9 Z7 |
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
" `/ ^1 l% E& L: \' N8 m. u1 f>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
1 y% w# j6 w; f8 `, x>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct- O4 }0 Q4 S2 d

" U, W% l# t, k& O/ q! E>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
" o9 a+ `' X) }; L% Z9 s>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
5 L# d% u: k4 m" _- ]& m. B1 I>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more . u4 i7 V7 x# B( W% I' t
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
+ d$ d5 k1 l0 V0 [. \1 f>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three$ N# i7 d. ?; n% {6 n( y5 f

; w' w9 u7 g; u1 o! D4 ?>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
% r* H* l; g! L3 j4 C% k/ _0 e1 c>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 1 t- T! r2 S% E; B
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 3 P+ a- f- [( y/ Y
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
$ g+ E/ K5 G" n; C4 S! I9 `+ XA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
3 f' }: H# x9 a; Flong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
- m# N- S9 f: W2 \that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
! i' _4 m$ A3 |. d' t: P3 I8 C3 Ythe newfie would l ...
3 i' C- W& e" N" k* d: G

3 m* w. `) C. V: {* z' W2 a* _" Z4 n+ V4 c9 b" y1 Q' S
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
- g# c$ M5 j/ I$ f" L“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
* j9 ~0 Q* @& U  G好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 " ]2 g# ~+ b/ W: k& O* ^* x
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
( |8 s# e5 F- L" O' l
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
7 K! }  Z7 d8 D5 N; ?" y% x" ~0 z& w/ l$ I1 i% \) i

8 W8 O: e1 n1 Q3 c4 r! K$ w& i% C) o9 ?4 F$ L9 m3 p) Q
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:: |* q, ~& O8 V# M2 j: X
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,' a/ s0 L& N8 [4 G
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
, F# [3 ^! H, w! j& {+ B% v; K
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
6 `6 Y- U4 V# B$ b- `
+ ~2 j2 |( x9 V! _' h* y真聪明,偶像啊
  e1 e6 l: w& t- U9 @" @: x0 D

! @" j& ~; ~# y: ?8 Q& b全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 3 D5 ~' {" y# I% f) M1 }5 L0 ~7 k$ `
% {' n$ J/ O' \$ r+ g& T
" v7 Y! u0 T% w! p5 e4 t9 x) a
全盘接受一下。
$ E4 J! t! Y  b* Y' a
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
8 o! }* b  x3 D' x- z, ~/ @9 t7 h7 q9 E  {& l
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
# h4 ]  Q* H3 h0 p5 y
/ \# c/ j- o% x5 M4 }. Z

: ^% g. D+ A* H别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
# [# o% ]+ I+ C; V4 q% {6 f7 C6 G  `$ `3 z/ h3 B& [

( x+ u3 s; P6 Y3 Y) P% }; e9 g! F, Y4 Q0 t3 |
别把我往坏路上领啊。

) k  |" V! V" n6 h" V0 Q; o/ _你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 6 T7 p  J+ e6 T# [8 T0 j7 e
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
; M, U) G& d, L! Y
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ' I& ^0 C8 j! t3 [' E8 ?
7 V2 F: w8 ]# |, O6 M
真博学,偶像啊。

1 R6 D+ Q- N  A0 W! o大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
6 `2 y; m4 Q& T9 P& z1 [
# K) r6 _% E8 G: G2 G0 E0 L! [大学教授哦,能不剥削?

) O! l: `4 u5 j6 |/ H她是大学教瘦?
) V' L' `$ M$ q" Y1 A+ n, _- g大学教胖还差不多
# {: U' j; z! b0 J0 D6 q- K* a她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
* P2 `" f8 a# q  J* b紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

$ f/ N( n. `0 F% O- f( N说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
/ ~- [5 P: Y1 |+ ~2 z* Z) x紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

& j( U7 {3 s: z! }0 Q5 c
5 B1 N  Y3 D# S* l# X哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-4-18 20:22 , Processed in 0.238515 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表