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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
" e/ U0 r+ C, |7 H4 ^) W) qlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
5 ^& i- M4 g" h9 \. Xthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
0 I; @: z7 ?* _2 P$ t, Othe newfie would like to play a fun game. - s9 d% q" r. H& T, B
  
; L: a  u0 E! Q( D- V3 X% U The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so$ Z/ o. \' D! X# l+ E( m* ~
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
4 A' C8 j! {5 R! C6 O0 ]' ~/ X lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I0 u2 J6 T% Y; @0 g5 J7 G$ Y/ n6 M
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,! F0 g& ]& {- V7 w& l0 }
you pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I( h; G0 I3 z$ m& K
will pay you $500. ( A( \  W  S; @9 ~0 N1 X
; S  {" r& d' C/ `4 _( ^
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
& G. {  e6 N6 Z( `the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. $ K" p7 g3 U$ N# T
3 i8 Z2 c6 x# G' I. i0 ?
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's6 a3 z5 j( V# u8 I
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
7 T: w2 N+ J2 b2 R; o, ^
/ `/ |" a- M4 R4 M' g: @  k# l1 [The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his8 w# J& |4 \# I1 ?0 v' u% B
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
; s# [1 j6 M3 @5 i& s* z: tlawyer. ( ^; P: G6 V  {& c
4 S. s& o0 k# O
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
2 g$ ~2 X$ D" N: rthree legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
* M. C" f7 _* O& O) K' Q8 R6 Breferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all$ |/ }4 ^  f% w
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour( u( D8 Y& I, l+ F- U) W: m
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
0 }9 O$ m- _  `+ B+ Ahands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right0 H( G8 @8 E* c. x/ O
back to sleep.
6 t1 }& L  @5 y0 p& V# P0 P/ V* c! ^5 X! Y: Y: b5 X$ _
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
' a) ]* ~- G: q* [0 X' cwakes the newfie up and asks, " K. f9 Y& F0 r* U  p

' C% `' y( W, f8 ]' k/ F'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and5 A0 z8 y9 f0 W/ w6 f' L
comes down with four?'
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9 m2 B: O  C$ {* N4 `The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $58 f- v, Y% u: Y6 `4 O+ ~+ G/ Z
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the" e% L7 I/ _! _0 b

" u" N+ |' L& Y- Y, H3 O' {>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 9 ?7 ^3 S  }' e# g4 h, `# P6 c* X
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
) f. f( n  ?9 [% T- x* a>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the ; B: C1 f4 L( J; u$ M
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
$ N; h1 B# y7 ]% m5 N>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct6 H% g( E' }# Y- R0 ^6 c; c8 m
# d' z1 l- ^' x
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
+ B8 h# X* w) _: v) o, X! p>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
9 J& a& n3 t" }" z) O8 r>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more   n7 K. j/ j3 [% w1 A
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
2 y/ ], a: t/ {2 O8 @>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three, y0 o' {/ S$ p& L, Q
+ C$ H8 Z: @/ p/ G! ]
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 3 [5 X- k' X2 X/ |9 T& f0 a
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
; g& F1 |. C! j2 n>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
* O% P7 Q7 E+ {' j3 q2 o% Z7 ^' N>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 0 T  p* ~+ s6 A5 s' n4 I
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a" r( }9 @; B  m3 L6 [
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb$ P6 i, e! ~& ]
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
9 v1 [  C2 @! @( othe newfie would l ...
6 }' C: g6 a& [" ~! r* l7 i

5 y" w. l! q& p5 ?' ^; X; U8 D! M2 C' \( A! {
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:, C% P6 H- ^2 C
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
5 `. Q8 D  N, ^2 q- y好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 3 g+ R( `, T% M* y$ R
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

* z1 g! j2 U2 i7 q- x真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
+ n. `+ v; I/ U1 m  a
/ ?3 T5 i( c: ?0 x+ x9 J2 e- P: ^& \% M- r1 z3 s% a

* Q* L1 i' N6 P! m, S0 f* H好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:3 f3 L4 t/ a  N! v$ m, u3 e
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,% ^1 {3 M3 w% C4 B7 [, ?  B6 Y$ a
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
2 U0 |4 v! z/ F9 B3 ?& P5 W7 b
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
" @# ~" u8 ?( ~  q8 g5 ]9 ?
: C: z8 Y% [! h8 Q+ i' v$ Q真聪明,偶像啊

# ]( e" q/ |5 K3 i4 K& b  M) q) n
( c$ M: ^/ k2 w  P# ^1 a( R# n全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ; l! Z: G/ ]5 O7 h  L* C
! `( X! k. b  D  g. g

1 ?3 @! {# ^3 r全盘接受一下。

& |! D2 ?. s$ r真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 + T7 g# p' G) N5 ^! N  b3 R6 u; @
! D0 ?2 U: ~# B1 O
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 + c, W' R! W4 o. t

- Q- ~) N/ G5 ~1 C) g4 L" t- V& Q( v- J" S. ^; k5 u

( K: C2 p! A" |1 I6 M+ g6 U别把我往坏路上领啊。

: n) m: H) x+ b' p  M: \你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
+ A8 f! d* U% r9 K加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 , ~6 u" `2 r& S8 w3 D2 X1 `2 B

- r& [& |1 L, @( e+ p真博学,偶像啊。
  A% [- T0 K' c- E& F' A
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
9 s5 O; ?. W' e, R6 C$ O9 }
. ^7 _7 v. |! _7 }- E, Y% ~大学教授哦,能不剥削?

  O8 @2 f3 j$ ?7 e% d, u% ^: j她是大学教瘦?
& a( U  r9 P) Y  K1 p大学教胖还差不多
. U: K& X: q# L3 q$ ^她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 7 Y; P- T. Z$ e) e
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
+ B/ _8 L/ X# p* i( W
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
0 }9 f' y8 q8 [, m6 X紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

8 p/ I, s- E" @6 x9 k: H2 q. N( p
: I! U8 K9 n' P9 _  r1 M) u7 f哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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