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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a" J" O) v5 r& t$ A6 Q& W2 t
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
/ i* }% ~: U2 Tthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
' _& R9 K  l+ x& g) Hthe newfie would like to play a fun game. 7 }* d: t# t. q7 b! }
  . \3 D5 Z4 z2 P
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so& H' f/ b" L; M2 y7 t/ W3 \
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The4 L4 U6 {, {& E! ?, h* y
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
6 j6 n( L" c8 q/ b2 C4 yask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
" }. a# A2 v4 E$ Y% |& iyou pay me only $5. 8 ^6 c) ^0 p9 [0 S% K
# ^& M! l, c, \) u& T: A; i
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I" Q/ O% ?% `1 {- A
will pay you $500. 9 d* L. G* L# {9 p7 [3 q

( O/ b2 K* u1 f This catches the newfie's attention and to keep2 R2 w# d" P) P7 B% r4 Y, M: S
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
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8 l( |- X# s/ s" M8 k/ `The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's0 ~7 ]% _5 t+ b6 t) K+ m4 j/ v& l9 L
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
% p  n  i5 U% V1 B0 D5 X1 z
, u) P+ O1 @( y6 Z& B! n0 LThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
! G6 _# e7 I1 s" H% ^3 Fpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the7 [8 ^* x/ }) V: Z7 T
lawyer. " v1 }% C8 w9 J- M) F

! J6 D0 A8 X! G4 ]6 r9 p0 _Now, it's the newfie's turn.
7 O' T% x% e5 r/ F
2 n/ a( @3 ~2 z" `: b' V1 x& FHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
, W1 f4 z  ?5 E1 z' h5 L# g! }three legs, and comes down with four?' 8 B9 m1 E4 E8 ~5 i
  \( i: Q/ \3 i7 a6 s6 T0 g9 |
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
7 {) z: ?: ^6 q+ l- {/ preferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all. D  F/ t. A% R, m# q+ h# g* s( c6 z
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour+ e* j/ Z6 k3 E4 [
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and2 o& h7 B1 {: a: C- j
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right; K& E4 M1 j$ [, g2 N- }( C
back to sleep. ) g+ @1 w$ T, q3 n& o: ]. f6 k
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
* Y9 a8 H3 ]- `2 Y3 Cwakes the newfie up and asks,   N/ H0 v3 R: }- s9 I( B1 k7 G

" f0 w0 n3 w; g' n/ @: G'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and3 k% k- `( U; K" _& F& O
comes down with four?' & h, {& s" @9 z/ J; }7 O& M

& n- N( m. O9 c  v7 T3 |The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
; E( p/ U* S4 q; dand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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# n' u+ H7 e1 X* P5 lLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
大型搬家
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the/ T7 J; J: @" ]; F

9 A; M. T* O( n5 N; Q; P. a$ [>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
* j/ ^3 u- ]5 o) a7 b4 P- c1 k>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason + {( u& }7 O/ |; W: Y' A1 R
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
/ z' |" u% M/ d2 _5 ]0 C5 |+ j>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, & U5 d1 q, V( V. x4 T8 o
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
. |5 z" a+ h& I+ z
8 G* U( g4 y* p7 a% N>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
7 V8 G  C# G! |/ C>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
! b! r+ }- ]' W3 f' ~5 M8 C) @- |>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
2 y9 e/ `. T& u. \+ N  J/ r! \; \$ E>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
2 a1 X5 Q6 }  d+ j>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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! D3 y+ u/ h; o; B  v9 o* J>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
& `- u- n9 P1 r9 W$ E! n>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
& A! W2 e* N! P  {1 @>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
  @. ^0 ]3 p2 \7 f3 ^! y>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 7 X/ n: k% p$ f' u- p" O
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
) p; }7 g  b* t2 plong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
# \! s& C2 f# `  T& m! Rthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
  f' k8 z3 J% othe newfie would l ...

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: _! M3 i# ~  T1 h( H
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:/ w* O' i$ I$ v5 x; R
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,) \! D$ n, k/ }/ ]' y% ~0 D2 i7 K
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
. G: U0 m. ~0 A5 D9 B) e; O) l加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
% c5 ]- c6 n0 `$ C" A% B
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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6 @% R8 v8 R8 F5 I& L8 M, H2 M; G4 a) f

& A& Q2 ~4 N, Z9 {& M  W6 Z好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
4 Z  y; g$ F! ?* P4 o7 A“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
* s2 J) b4 p* j$ j  l好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

; _8 D; [6 h6 z# O# d0 K3 l% ]真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ; J# q) l  a/ L  P: {& J. |

6 V9 Z2 t1 z  @1 O3 X真聪明,偶像啊
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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 2 B7 B/ v5 |( _, _- q' L- v( [
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8 f. g, i2 T* k9 W1 w/ E
全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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. W4 @" r2 c! H1 K. K& t6 f真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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+ W: d' O5 @/ ~2 k* G: ~
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 % e* t- `8 a0 f

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  j7 N, k& `1 Q4 ~+ p6 U别把我往坏路上领啊。
8 z3 I0 ?# P  D  ]. @
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ' T. Q& F( q! H
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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% O! N3 ^7 [5 B4 M真博学,偶像啊。

% S6 K6 F! R2 u9 l% y大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ' Q' C4 I, g; N
8 r( a8 J  _$ [0 h5 K
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

1 w: }, Q* a" L5 P2 ?3 k她是大学教瘦?
+ |  N/ E0 P1 f% v5 y# F. G2 d大学教胖还差不多
" O$ a9 q6 D2 O' b, e" O她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 $ V+ m6 l) J/ [  }/ _( C7 A& \! I
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 : w' L0 [3 h, C/ Z, d
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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