埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 5517|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a: L; `& B0 M# [6 X) \
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb" I3 N0 ]& S4 O* `
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
. {  p2 g/ H: b) ~* i/ gthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
$ I5 V  n. R3 T7 `3 z& b- V  2 l% V5 I& ~) K
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so% i3 i5 O4 k3 Q% t' \: b
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The4 N* B1 C4 l7 d; O7 Y) U4 C
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
/ _2 c# f5 |3 I0 V5 h6 z; `3 s9 Gask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,9 a8 i5 U4 _' `$ H# v! I/ E. a
you pay me only $5.
+ {- U$ \' n3 G, t* r# w/ J/ t
2 W% @1 D6 H0 `& ?. }6 X, ? You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I; [- Q  ~; m* z- F% J
will pay you $500.   Y# o# L/ W9 h* L; ~7 G
: U" t! @$ j. L. }
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep0 N% }) K# y: s) d
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. + I" H7 X2 r8 i& ^

, C2 y+ ?# u' ~7 ~The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's  n! @% S$ B( \0 {6 T" w. e( p
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
1 J, T% D2 I( @
- d( Y: V+ w7 e9 n+ uThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his3 N" V; |9 [& q2 ^7 y. g* b. ~
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
- t% w" f& d5 i( F" h2 tlawyer.
7 x5 E; {* o1 f( _' ^$ v) ?: \. O
0 s7 c: Z3 J! t, d: ~2 qNow, it's the newfie's turn.  ^  P- I% @- Z* Z! ?' g
4 l: D6 R& A) v
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with; @7 l4 \! N0 T! c, \2 ?/ t
three legs, and comes down with four?' ( [' W: ^$ a: m0 l. N% E
% U- P# C5 N6 {# B
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all6 D1 \7 o3 [! k% Y1 F
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all7 o: N5 y; l* ^9 ?6 O6 Y5 w! Z" Z% u0 [
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
& K  s5 Q/ p8 k6 zof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
4 J5 J9 @! v0 k" v) P- w7 Lhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
, z. k% m* \  Wback to sleep. $ d' E. }3 r' m$ J

% J) f, S8 r( p. B. {$ y6 ~) \6 _The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
% P! k: p0 c+ c7 p3 s6 gwakes the newfie up and asks,
2 O6 d8 i4 _- g- `; [, T* Y$ r) |& q2 H9 ]  e" ?5 U
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
' a2 F. u' h- wcomes down with four?' # ]/ V& R9 w& f2 ?$ C

2 |$ M6 E& |* U$ BThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5& G% X# w+ q! L
and goes back to sleep." @! y" J9 a8 f) v  S* ?' a
, ?3 g7 [% s0 q0 m+ j
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
: p5 I3 q* E, q. U6 H' r+ A* h4 C& \- u/ a2 w9 u! I" |% N
Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
( j3 v$ G, v, U: E- @# V' c( _8 f  ]4 j/ Z, j& d  U
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
, }4 J  U1 v( C( ]9 A) K: W>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
- D: q9 O8 \5 u>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the ; H' l/ X8 ~4 Q' Y8 h  @
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ' q8 u3 a1 k" V) ]
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct4 L2 O/ Q* }3 i5 J$ w, }( b

% a# ?( S$ q# E% A& L3 }. R>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
$ b4 h- n: u0 }8 K  b+ B. \>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
" `' p2 r; ]) q4 I) b) F$ V, f>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
4 S  B( u" I* i$ A  a* ]: c  M>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
3 O; p$ a& X# n>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
% Q4 N+ d/ l: S2 m+ b8 r
, F4 e" ~0 Q# @' N. C: S>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
; I/ \% m4 a# |2 a>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 6 I4 O: |& K; x: y5 W- S: @) v
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand / o1 g0 \, ]1 n" f) x
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 1 b1 z$ P. Q0 U. F; g
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
# m; l6 H/ Z2 w& flong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb, ~: X9 U% f2 ^0 D5 ?
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if4 I; a" U* g0 R9 q5 m
the newfie would l ...
0 H4 D* V6 {; u2 e
5 e7 U) R/ q: u4 K3 k( m/ a

8 f7 {* H0 n8 O8 B( N好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:0 b: \8 D- L% ^  S
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,  ?) x+ b9 W& d$ p! n9 J. P4 M
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
/ J  f" t4 _) O, \/ O9 L) A1 t; k加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
+ V3 S3 O  {! @" U6 U' i) V
真博学,偶像啊。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
2 }) i) G: @, ]% O. j" {
! A4 H, j8 T4 \) _( P, ^1 O; V1 K$ A" H. |( b# U
! R) X1 p5 k: R  \4 b7 E
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
; a* z* t2 y* q$ M9 I0 p6 b! k. B7 i“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,9 K: |5 c5 o% W0 f: P3 o
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
1 E3 O5 @; c* i' p$ D# \; {
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
5 {3 Z6 e/ @6 p6 k$ G( t- B4 q/ N; c% f2 e0 [1 p% E* f
真聪明,偶像啊
4 K# b5 z# b" d8 l0 H
& r  j8 S/ y. P6 S$ |( U
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
1 D7 [5 G! s5 C7 ]+ X  H" e8 H( L# _- T0 v4 K

9 q. O1 I& [' }, N, T全盘接受一下。
7 L% w; A; |& z& C
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 4 ~2 c* T# a3 H

8 c/ A* F0 ~  W) t真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
" Y. M8 l  K  B( k

$ U* K' E! b  Z* f
$ y4 `. D- C" r2 i" T. I别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 : ]7 y& y( N9 `2 \) {+ z8 \, Z$ J
; v% g( w$ i$ z0 c
/ T7 q1 r) R$ j2 o5 B

- V- g* V  j" y6 u* _$ X& d别把我往坏路上领啊。
& Z& G* C0 @" |7 }; J8 @3 t
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
8 H  k6 F  u' Z/ W6 J: y加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
4 A# @+ R. y2 @
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 5 p, z7 O' v8 }. O+ c- U
0 j! b+ `/ G( n. M
真博学,偶像啊。

, s" p2 ]4 e. s( X大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
8 ]/ l: w$ j2 {: X
! |* j9 t* v5 l% i& P: i大学教授哦,能不剥削?
; q' v# i0 f- _4 `6 f# I3 o+ \+ D
她是大学教瘦?
: ]& d" ~: ~0 @8 j6 N' c4 X7 X大学教胖还差不多
( Q* C1 s7 {) h她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 $ K0 [' J% H* {# R# V9 |% O
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

5 I! K6 h+ ]# Z6 o" o$ Y/ I& n. e  |说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 0 N; m/ l. L+ Z& |' H) x
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

9 \0 w( a$ {& ?% R# K( |: ?! j6 V) C8 {% I* B
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-6-7 14:59 , Processed in 0.169202 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表