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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a6 ^. C7 L# [' k) j0 s
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb) r+ l, ]$ ]8 n$ Y9 }1 d; N, q
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if# e; s' \1 a3 |% q
the newfie would like to play a fun game. 2 w3 N% r0 D: ~0 v" M
  
" w3 m( g& a3 e  ~2 | The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so# C' ^0 M% }1 K; q$ f! D  g
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
, {& z& T9 [& V2 x/ a8 R lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I+ R% G. z* S; ]2 U% X& U% w
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
4 g8 i5 W. m9 T7 U7 c1 @, W4 s$ Nyou pay me only $5. 0 v7 ]8 V, q: |

+ w% k% V# L$ s3 d, ?3 B You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
7 r8 \. p; m+ ?$ L; N2 N6 W will pay you $500. ) t* K& J$ z4 W6 p

8 W2 Z8 f2 Z! H. k# |7 G This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
. f7 C2 d, w2 W0 t2 Vthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
4 [5 J) A& \8 F, ^3 ~) R9 p' C$ A" S8 G9 h7 t3 t! a9 A
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
* P- L# {% p/ b& uthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
2 [) H7 o! w( i! ]% r8 c8 E; S9 `  z1 C. x* V
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
% `9 x1 ?5 u7 x3 kpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
- E& {* b5 _5 w% @: N5 e. Ulawyer. ) g3 |# {6 F; r5 ]( T" F

+ a! ?) G4 a" N1 o7 uNow, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
/ W6 C' ~; _/ a$ P& x7 J! P9 cthree legs, and comes down with four?'
2 y* |9 Q/ v8 X5 B& X0 c8 [0 L! y* u- U( x+ U( O
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all( C7 [, v) ?; @8 d! b
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
7 Q. B; R* A" k/ I. Q' e: Ythe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
. K! o2 k& [$ sof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
& E* m8 q' ?* k( ghands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
# n) _9 B0 D$ q7 i' Q" X: s* Mback to sleep. + o3 B; f& m# z& |' \

3 F& x3 N/ \1 ZThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He) E8 D$ N4 K0 ]) J
wakes the newfie up and asks, 6 Y9 J4 {6 F0 ~- I2 X/ R! s% r0 Q

. {: g5 R7 i( c1 ?8 Y7 W'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and7 \& ~$ v/ `8 s: c  B2 R+ q
comes down with four?'
4 y/ `/ f3 I8 J
& g( ~- B. L4 g: B4 j; W4 [3 N5 ?The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5. Z4 S$ g6 d+ _+ E
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the2 f, w1 @0 Z, e- D

9 l' p- T/ ?8 a! x" _% ~; D>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 4 M9 {4 k1 F; J% Q7 |# M
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason   T) `2 g- [" b' R. T7 u
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the : Z8 r" a; I4 M
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
) g! _* P- z, D" V: b>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct3 ^! B6 W( m1 _0 h6 b% B
  \" X9 w( f! N! d; B2 g
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 1 G: P3 J7 t' a4 }
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 6 G7 W- d3 |' u( o
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
& b* {  c9 s7 j4 s>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, * v: ^+ p* d. o. t
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
' S& g6 j; A' v$ r
/ m2 L$ t: s: u$ f>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 9 E# ?# L) ]' ^  N4 W( t! Q
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
) b1 [. q' `7 \# D8 U: q  ~# G>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
5 w1 p2 c  _6 `- f8 i>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 ' Q3 G1 O4 i% t$ {% Q
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a9 {( n+ \* @( }8 U' `7 }
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb% \" z8 W2 P' ]% f+ O6 }, D: r
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if- h; c. U2 K% c9 m
the newfie would l ...

7 s2 f7 g+ Z7 }. N2 A8 \  G0 U
2 J: a' A& V1 w! P/ s3 K0 @8 q7 ]0 ?6 X) Z, @; t$ _  t2 W
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:6 h3 [: L3 `5 q9 m
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
, I$ U: c% N) W7 X好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 + ^; M# r" e% s! C
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

& x: k& Y" }  V$ C8 @真博学,偶像啊。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 1 S+ }+ k% n  H$ ]) _

, q1 B4 \4 n" _2 D) Q* K
/ n" |; l+ Y0 D: y& W4 Q2 J; [0 M$ O
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:+ [/ }' D1 n4 |9 t
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,. n( n( T$ }' e( ~6 u) r( t! e4 I4 F8 @
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
3 d. F) P$ z' \9 U' o
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 4 j1 p" g. ]. N% y! _3 t$ Z% Q
  N0 R+ n0 P- t/ [! j6 J
真聪明,偶像啊
* z, w! N& }4 G6 {1 v8 p8 F& L

4 j0 L5 o* O+ A9 Y: b  z7 M全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 2 m/ H- z9 t( |4 s* m

: T; k! N0 j5 T. c2 t
9 s% P* X! i2 E( N' D, a2 s7 z全盘接受一下。
2 V6 I' {4 j* B' a9 A$ }
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 , S* a$ l, P9 S* T/ o' V

) q  l$ f  o5 D' b真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

1 [' Y2 }& L- @5 q4 k5 V7 f, [  O7 t, _' {0 t0 h6 Q2 ~

  d/ |4 ~- j/ R8 E别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 + H9 Y: [9 I4 t4 |
# T; J. c" U9 s2 A9 c2 L8 w
# V4 o1 z0 P- Y0 ^

3 v% ^8 ~2 w+ w$ i  W: e别把我往坏路上领啊。

# ^* C2 S4 r! F/ _* f你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 0 V( z4 [3 U& c  w% H4 r" B
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

2 D" a* U. h* d* z6 K多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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* A: I4 K8 C- k/ u! d+ w真博学,偶像啊。
% I: z. m) z  F
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 0 A2 v  n- ^6 N8 M6 d# b% w: D  ^. W( L

* d6 @+ b  ~) j7 `1 f- u大学教授哦,能不剥削?

9 O2 a# J9 q$ n她是大学教瘦?& V2 f' W  f5 n( w
大学教胖还差不多
1 T# V, U8 U- ~1 G# w$ e她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
& ]" s) r4 \4 I& P; G紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

& ^! N' |  o8 |说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 5 Y) a% E3 m1 M% N" |5 [. t5 z
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
4 C9 N1 z# W2 C+ `: d

0 f' Z/ o1 c; e$ G3 G% X哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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