埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 5493|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a& X' O; a9 A9 _, Z
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb/ Y1 }+ I5 i0 q6 y# V  [
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
$ G1 X4 V  e, kthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
0 d9 a/ U/ I" a+ R. E" G  9 I& o% l) t+ T  Y5 e/ `! W% T
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so" H, C2 r6 \0 y! I
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The. G1 }2 O6 `" V& d" }% s* J1 u5 b
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
$ q- v4 w) f  S; ~" K4 Z0 Y4 task you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
5 P6 t- b8 M6 B7 j3 e7 [) dyou pay me only $5. ' _! @  r4 G9 F) |( S6 I; _' B) g

* i* s6 L, L9 K$ Q You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I# P) I7 G3 H" R, ^/ }3 ?
will pay you $500.
! F: ~" _+ F* J. E! ]- A$ L7 |$ O3 d 5 z  S, u  o# I- d8 B1 C
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
5 k* P& \! T$ J% J( O$ m9 ~2 |the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. - b/ @7 t. d% Z1 j' o! s* L: B2 `  }
8 Y8 N: ]% f" ^5 \6 g4 c9 T
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
7 J1 a& c, m4 Q( c9 ?6 Uthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
  B/ C! C) \+ g* [5 g
; C% F( J# ^; L- L* d, }  dThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
. ~" d8 V3 W( ~0 G- N0 }pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
+ p2 c- A7 s8 n9 Y1 C' g2 W- `lawyer.
$ G9 `; x7 {' L3 b/ q/ v6 H  m$ I- T3 l' Q! i, M- j  t
Now, it's the newfie's turn.. G6 T; E9 j$ B0 w
; U7 O: P# ~. N2 e
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
' r- }* `5 u3 B9 a9 C- e9 ^4 ]three legs, and comes down with four?'
# R5 e4 ^# |( ^* K" `: z
! N  `$ j! A$ K* b0 bThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
0 t, j. k5 c/ o6 s& U3 lreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
% k1 a% `# e5 h; ]: `/ `the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
0 C$ u) w9 P9 F! d- O9 h; Gof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
' t/ F6 K9 r9 j3 g9 J: ?' X3 x! N  {hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
4 f# o, p4 n$ X' t' |. ^* `back to sleep. 4 H3 y2 E! h7 F/ ^( D1 k; W3 r' h
4 \6 N4 l% K  @2 m9 Q
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He* o  k  M2 n0 N
wakes the newfie up and asks,
% i7 X/ R3 c, o1 s" @: b1 @
' T7 M8 M3 a3 e: G! v'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and+ L) o5 [( {2 m( m9 y
comes down with four?'   t: D8 M+ q5 l* ^& M( b4 }* B

! Q& d8 I; k9 I1 A; uThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
6 @! P6 {2 X* J. @( N4 fand goes back to sleep.7 @: ^/ Y; e; B! _, |

& y0 K4 d( k. j9 [% K
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
3 M+ I, h4 [9 z1 e
% Z4 r& \, w$ M, v3 K+ g3 lLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the5 e* [! J; i1 W& o3 s5 G
  B# S! u% b9 Q1 p2 v- |
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two # a6 e2 p9 s6 o2 m
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 7 w: R( o( F& R
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
# V8 ^# R* Q* u6 h" E+ P>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
/ _; z3 }% d: L; b>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
% [( M" h3 u% c# ^- h
4 y9 W' _- k% q/ Q>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 4 H' F4 Q8 l4 e* I
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 8 Z, }; C% r) S8 V$ q7 U
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more ; j" J% z5 P4 S9 Y7 ~4 q
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
  N8 B( ?8 F" W+ V9 d( \>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
7 l7 C4 s# j: `1 O  u1 q5 v6 Q/ N& r
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
! B! v: ^- t! A1 U>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the : |" \8 l) K9 z7 H
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 6 ?) `4 `0 a( q
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
' L2 T$ |: D( h: [- [9 k1 n' q* L" \# xA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
7 d- I/ I0 G' z" F1 D  w" rlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
3 W" Q/ S; F; x( `& Z. i3 }that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if! l* k; T8 G2 `/ f. q" u# ?
the newfie would l ...

$ T8 U6 q' ?. o' U' c
' N6 T' r/ }- \2 D+ {, f+ I" t- z; U0 e
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:4 |8 @2 ^3 w8 S5 L7 x  x
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
6 u8 ^  j6 `$ T8 k好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 - ]0 p! ]) v3 |; b% S5 y8 P9 t
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
( T; ]' w, A8 X% t* ]# ^! F
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
8 K4 v. M  A% e0 H) Q
3 p6 z  s3 r& O& `2 u8 U5 o7 g  F" x

9 Q4 k) B3 P# G+ H1 K4 L' W* u% C. y9 }好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
" S" c* @" Z" g( @“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
+ [! H1 c; I* Z) f' g- Z5 E好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

( \  L0 \+ ]; j% }9 |0 C' \) b真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ! @; O: ~4 f2 G) T! Y

7 C0 ?( o) I# c, h( k1 U2 k真聪明,偶像啊

" [8 S( Q! \. Q+ H, Z9 |5 z. S
0 i& P& t% d2 N1 @6 S全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 5 r! i( Z/ D, I7 O; N  P$ Q, c
) E, G9 b; F! O/ [& ?& G% x
6 l9 b* E" V( a* ?- z( w6 G) G& u
全盘接受一下。

0 r# y$ L+ i1 ]$ n7 V真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
7 g% M/ S; d* c" s  v0 ^& n7 d' Q6 ^
" a7 l9 N* ]9 c6 t: ?真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
4 U  I8 h: @$ S% }0 B

0 L1 l8 W7 S) n5 i: H! \- P* I
6 F2 d! Y- z/ F" J  }$ W) S别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 3 R% x  d( D6 P4 M; ~
" B; \; O# F$ |, U4 v0 d. j1 @

, @7 T/ z5 X$ S. w, [9 r
6 c: A, @% C- l: a; u. k* L别把我往坏路上领啊。

- I/ s- |; e8 F$ I3 ~- D你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
3 U( P6 x' Y& U' I加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

! f: i! T  X* i- @$ U& ]% u多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
) B1 Z7 w' k6 n. |& X4 H# q6 F7 Y* @+ e
真博学,偶像啊。
( F+ b8 A6 S; m1 B: S
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
  z$ ^, m9 _- w9 j6 O# z' f7 {2 V1 {& l" b7 V: ?
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

9 B' o1 S0 ?7 B; x/ b7 n  d她是大学教瘦?
4 H. U6 u6 ~1 C, f% o" O! M大学教胖还差不多
" X5 |7 K4 E) Q" c+ D她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
5 ]5 O, U& T3 \0 G+ U( i3 p紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

$ N! ]+ R( _! E4 C3 ?6 p/ g说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 5 b8 `1 H& h! \9 n* d
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
. u# o+ D3 Z2 L4 I( d+ c
1 S/ q$ ^. t( H9 ?
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-6-4 11:41 , Processed in 0.187837 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表