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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a6 L9 L! W" N+ x3 o, _7 P/ p% H
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb- j+ H. r6 L2 E4 A/ ^. ^; F5 a
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if9 n1 F  i- i4 t6 Z  D
the newfie would like to play a fun game. ' O; C" _$ w! n, e5 Z% U
  
8 H8 S3 ~, A( X& c4 ~! p: x The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so2 m- f) W% C/ m1 n6 O, l1 @
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
* x' B1 u1 K! A4 [3 t) o lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I1 p0 K% w) m" W% t; A7 o) i* {
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,( c8 |" [4 w4 |! {, S/ m! ^1 T7 x8 O; c
you pay me only $5.
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/ C2 O  R( I$ u8 p( n You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
, g& }) u$ A$ }% X1 W$ }# w will pay you $500. 6 P! t+ o  r' d! v8 V/ d0 D
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
4 A0 n2 v! A- dthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ) \+ ?& l5 d) i* p& v

* {% Z2 }8 H" d1 h" VThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
  j4 K2 \' |" ~3 A( p% X% a+ s6 _" athe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 9 W* y5 S' s6 ?: N$ c- {
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
2 h% j/ |0 H- c* ]6 F; B7 ]! G) kpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
, a8 @4 ]3 }4 h) S6 ?7 r) f, V) ~lawyer.
# _8 ?$ V4 Z( D; v" L; E5 T: e. Z8 B$ `$ |1 f
Now, it's the newfie's turn." T2 K3 O. M7 D, n* C" F; W, ]& \
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
5 }8 D$ ?2 y0 c3 ?2 l# ~three legs, and comes down with four?'
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  |2 Z+ x' o% `& |, uThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all: ]- z% @- B5 }8 Q8 ^% w* |# i
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
8 _4 u0 J- \+ _- e& d- `+ m# s! `the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
; @/ s" Z% w5 M4 |of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and7 j# U: a" d8 v# @% p9 k, K
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right" Q$ Q! t' [- P5 L# j
back to sleep.
% l) c" L9 ~3 m& ]- j0 P
8 o% x+ i8 x# Z; q' BThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
7 X6 ~. W5 B! Z4 _5 H" o' nwakes the newfie up and asks,
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; N% o1 L2 L" F# _7 `. W'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and; ?+ B4 f( c- x; O; e* ?
comes down with four?' 9 M1 S+ P8 T( `
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5. G0 m. y1 o5 ?! F# G/ q( X; l
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!1 m$ o2 ?  U4 P4 s7 D5 X$ r
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
大型搬家
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
  o9 w4 y* }$ ]1 p# N. `>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason % J3 \2 g. W6 M0 e9 Z* D9 k+ N/ A4 U3 x2 b
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the ! I5 z* n2 G; p, k1 L7 K$ @( q
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, / @+ q( D2 C( W; @. Q
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
; m+ W7 Y8 `, ]! h/ E3 C' Q3 U% h8 ]4 V7 d+ d
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research ' r  g/ q! T2 e( O# l' N; g
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 3 ^: \0 C( i$ j+ w4 K
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
: G, n7 A6 c5 P>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
( ?' P1 |& n2 C  h6 ?+ K>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three+ g$ I, S7 n- F# ~9 Y% Z9 d- P

" |$ F( E! D+ Z+ k& v>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
8 }1 Q) F  t" p9 K" [9 J+ y9 d; V>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the % `$ }* d$ c8 f. M) {) ?
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand % U+ T+ \- ]: ^) X3 V( ]+ ^
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 2 ]& d1 c* o2 C& @
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a; L: x, Y3 L1 E! I5 k
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb9 e: Y- c7 X/ f. T* \
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if( J" v5 @  g3 K8 T+ l
the newfie would l ...

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) S1 j1 G7 E. k# Y% q1 s9 v0 {" @9 K( ^1 Q; h3 f6 C5 j
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:7 t8 \/ V( m0 \5 H9 m
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,! c& F' x* O2 w5 S. i! [/ L; ?
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 : V& C9 Q: z$ P9 [& T
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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, ], @5 t  T* F# @+ ~4 A# u

" V: h6 C, c( Y1 A好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
6 ]. l7 h+ f! g7 Z# x0 I“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
8 o( B5 u( [0 i5 l好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

* L# B* C" z/ J5 n2 _9 `- Z真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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0 H" N4 C: H# k2 a真聪明,偶像啊

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( @+ J! D/ N2 p  A" a: w: }: P全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 . r5 T( R% N6 |8 V. K

) q- y% M6 V$ d4 X
5 Y" L1 @: K6 w! z' h3 A全盘接受一下。

! `; p  M# J/ X; A  |  }' f4 D真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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) v0 s6 |: y* T3 h. X# f( _$ s
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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$ ~7 e" o& K7 |% G' O+ K0 i1 V4 ]* M7 @/ z+ N1 M7 f) c0 O
别把我往坏路上领啊。

2 g# @* y* e" s9 ?. E你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 % I/ ~. E) _9 g) o6 D8 [5 X
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

- F# |8 @, Q1 E多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 " K8 l4 {- ^8 @# s

! S$ z3 R# l4 V7 e8 i+ z9 k大学教授哦,能不剥削?

' Q2 L7 _; p; d0 B! z( B/ |) ~她是大学教瘦?
" I8 r% C" g) x+ K5 u: Z- J  i大学教胖还差不多
& @5 `! J$ `+ f8 j她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
) r& |) {) l1 y紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 + c! P  K- k/ a3 _4 m' L
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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