埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 5163|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a0 r) l! Z. I- ]- J: m* l
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
, w  w! M) n- s  M3 W: T, Y$ Mthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
+ s9 C& m! l2 }/ l9 Tthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
+ J! P8 X4 n0 T" J+ S4 C" l0 @  / k9 E: _' ]. `- r: ?1 h. g+ s
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so& w- T# O, j4 G% L* U
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
6 ]9 a& Z( |6 C$ |( f* d/ M lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I( V4 _# C2 b/ m# x
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,. Q( `& C- t; C9 R$ }6 T; T6 e5 J
you pay me only $5. , L  c% o0 {6 O# G, q0 i4 `* m& Q

6 [! \7 b6 Q: K1 M$ Y( H+ V You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
7 U/ x5 x' A6 P3 D3 F will pay you $500. : M* p% W- O4 K' ^

& }1 b( o  F; A6 R This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
4 \$ X* ~9 u( n4 k0 [7 n+ V. Bthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 1 [- g6 S! M5 G7 M, E/ m  O- Z

) v8 k' _8 p, Z% ?. ?3 N& RThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's$ \. H& k6 X# m* [
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
  Q  ~1 m( [" g4 @% i/ X  K- I+ I9 L/ v0 e. p5 w
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
* ]* G) J4 k8 v& i# l$ P3 b9 u. F- `pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
$ }1 j8 o+ A! E' a- M: g0 E) xlawyer.
+ c5 f8 \- _- B1 A  X" L9 ^
2 z. U, x0 @2 |7 G( x! W% b& TNow, it's the newfie's turn.
$ ^+ L/ E- o+ b% V1 T+ r; C
9 [  K6 x- f+ r7 o* G: VHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
6 l: O8 [7 y. o# }) K% hthree legs, and comes down with four?' ; e( f1 x9 H, n6 P5 q
: n" P9 s5 \+ K) |
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all4 P3 R3 b. L* T0 _; @1 I
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all& |* C/ r9 U6 v* @
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
$ g* l: ^6 i% fof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
& A/ `) [. \2 H& p% T1 |hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
3 C3 J. f- r. G$ a& X# E3 R* G8 y0 Zback to sleep.
+ B, A5 Q" [" @/ P4 e5 N, E
5 L% p; Q  F" k) pThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
, V: E! |- [: u! @- mwakes the newfie up and asks,
7 k' Q) {( q% n8 m+ r; n* V7 y  ^; b; l9 {
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
2 R1 T+ v" a  B/ Acomes down with four?' 6 J) N% E9 M4 j' r  M

, V! z: I( z+ s' m$ ]5 e. LThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
/ G! R9 d1 G# R. |and goes back to sleep.
: Q- @6 @. u( ~) f: {
) |* Y/ j2 U3 D# t* n( n9 c6 G/ d
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
2 i% k+ X* |6 K8 N1 G# L5 b& V, t7 ?0 N3 L/ G8 D9 ^
Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
8 Z/ |6 w5 h' x+ M
: H- g2 K8 G! I1 b6 ?1 S>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two " y. b$ M4 m% g7 |" k( F7 r
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
% G$ [/ G  Y& V7 [" h8 R% R>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the $ I, r9 W7 {6 H2 `; R, a5 m0 h
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ) a6 U& ^/ ]/ H* [+ d/ `0 Y
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct' {' M+ r  X& d: n7 y& f: K- k
/ c4 N: x; p4 `$ v5 d0 B, P, F
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 8 p, \/ }) K* ~( F
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a $ r; M! r7 ]% g5 K+ Z2 A
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more ( k6 I8 t# o. f5 F; I# p3 [5 T/ j- h
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
2 s- [- s' p% `7 Y" w>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
: W$ Z  ~9 `& Z! t$ D* s8 Y) R9 |0 s+ e* U/ u
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's * Q3 a, K# [8 R
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the $ h8 K% z, L. G/ B5 ]: J
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
5 ^% K- ]/ E# a$ Q5 s>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
7 ~, ?; P8 |6 P6 M, G# MA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
; q, k6 {" p, n4 B$ ?long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
) D' U9 |- s4 n: X/ Q. mthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if# o' z& j. K$ A/ Z
the newfie would l ...
3 l5 b$ O3 m5 f, [1 _. ~  s2 W% J
7 @/ t$ \8 c: S
$ v! `& \/ Q7 ?, h. J. p1 e
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
. n* R' C1 Z9 e0 n“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
' G. g- ?: N9 {, H8 j0 x好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 3 u- s1 z; k5 t, k/ e
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

/ K4 }9 ^. m' L2 C& s0 c1 j$ w真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ' P5 {" W) `4 \0 G9 Z

4 d$ o' q2 {1 a$ |6 U5 u' l1 D  ~2 t4 G( T( [' T0 S) b6 b: q

! v0 O: m( e  F2 i好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:8 r! z2 p7 X- R
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,6 }+ `; `/ g$ Y1 O+ `
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

0 \( W/ p; ~% q; G真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
( L+ v! u9 I$ \; O
: C1 m/ ^; a6 X真聪明,偶像啊

5 S5 z$ i0 k7 }5 B2 I
0 S/ O  T& `( H! ~  s* e) d全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
! U6 t6 Y+ d/ S: X
" A2 e# ~" }  Z# _! [6 J$ r+ X& f9 Y5 F/ w$ t
全盘接受一下。

& B9 J7 z1 r( J* e真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
* i0 Z- b5 Q6 I* o$ B2 H& B; T( U' ?# }9 H. [7 [
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
8 z8 m- B+ K' H& T' f  U: b
; V/ v3 E: L) a; c# t
, l4 Y; e3 L- }6 U" J, P
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 2 N$ Q( Z( R5 m! S
7 r7 m5 S! }: t! f
9 c' W4 V7 J$ v4 L

3 m) Y2 L/ T2 Y/ Y别把我往坏路上领啊。
% b& }( M/ M: E6 v( J) Z2 e
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
0 F* {: L  u+ e* t  Z3 O  {4 d- y. {3 A加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
0 a: e* J0 W5 Z( M+ @8 f
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 7 H/ `4 W! B) I. q% t. b4 p  Z

3 s6 ^- l$ L' W& I) V  Q真博学,偶像啊。
3 e  L8 B9 ?. V# w& i- \
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
. n7 Y- J  C+ l0 B% y- a8 Z
( W& H# \% j( q  B) v大学教授哦,能不剥削?

! M. M" _0 W+ n6 Q7 Z5 Z7 a她是大学教瘦?& Z$ W- P  Y$ v+ _. {
大学教胖还差不多 , X1 z7 T/ X3 A% t
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ! I" ]0 h# Y: w' c+ D0 z1 r  [
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
: i2 L( @+ M7 f5 ]( b, R
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 , @  N% s# U, ^/ ?
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

. L6 k2 r$ k! v) y" t3 X. X) B- [4 `; [
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-4-25 01:01 , Processed in 0.250099 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表