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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a9 S+ U3 R3 _9 A: S4 B
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
. |0 w# O0 |% @) O: Othat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
( w& k: I: K% X7 q: nthe newfie would like to play a fun game. 7 q9 p3 N4 g8 W3 K$ x7 s4 X
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so4 z$ X' q8 T2 d5 z6 A2 J
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
- g- }4 t& K/ w. F/ T2 E# x  T3 J lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
# h  G/ ^+ O1 g8 p# w/ iask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
8 u) \6 D# ~4 qyou pay me only $5.
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* f2 T2 b/ [6 }& h# N You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I: Q# Q2 i% V' e% e) F! k
will pay you $500. 9 s  X3 |7 Z0 B3 t$ ^" o
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep4 u$ E1 p6 Q$ b: g" _$ j
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. # o+ |& u; q/ M( x
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
$ [7 l5 i& I1 J2 Y0 o5 Lthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ! S0 b. W. V5 I* K

2 I+ x6 }' A. _0 h5 u7 ]1 _2 DThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
( r, N, ^7 C1 W0 e% J8 L( i4 Rpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the6 o6 V# i2 i5 t. ^3 h! V9 I
lawyer.
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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- B7 o" P! ^  w9 I, y$ FHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with1 J9 l& |4 _9 C+ I! n5 v
three legs, and comes down with four?' ! v# L  P5 j( k
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
: `- z$ B1 `' O- D& b6 T3 \references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
+ t$ |8 }7 U/ h4 f% |7 N, gthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour! O' n# ]; K6 S, m, w
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and( B% ~0 u% x4 e4 Y* k
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right9 @& U2 ?, Y4 b! F1 M1 n" R, I
back to sleep. 0 U% m- F9 b: ]* s1 _) K$ z

9 j7 e) Q. U, h' h+ W( lThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He1 }% ~+ O& q; B3 P8 o
wakes the newfie up and asks,
. W4 O1 w* n4 I$ J; P0 o
1 H5 y' P  ]: N4 T- @- X" x'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and6 m4 n* c" m7 c1 ^4 \
comes down with four?' * {8 y8 A# D2 m4 W- s) D+ |3 V

9 S1 e0 t0 P  f  C7 G; AThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
/ H, I" S  a) P; D1 h& nand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!1 r7 L( v- Q3 l( ]9 z- N

# `; F8 i+ W. L1 U- y6 x8 [Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
9 A% g6 M: q3 e' R0 l2 t$ [' L6 E) o# A7 o: k# b: m% q6 h5 e
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
! b, E+ i9 Y1 V>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
. ^; u2 j8 T2 [3 P8 v: Y; D: a>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the * R1 g9 ]7 c$ O
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
( h4 ~! e& F9 ~% @& T* }>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
# l9 O1 ]; E* M- O% d* m
" ^( v0 c+ k; k, J>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research . [' Q' E/ [0 t
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a + S! x9 W. R6 m8 X& }% {
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 4 X4 [5 a  u/ P+ p' S+ e
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
. {) O# H" K$ V/ h# [# d5 V>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
" `. r: m9 g) L! H! f! c7 V( p
; p: B- K# b" o: I* Z6 @( K>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
& z& z( E2 N/ T. }2 z7 F/ @>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
: V: u6 `* j3 i+ j>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand   W  V3 y6 m+ F& L* W, m% {0 r
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 , q7 h  c+ d$ c
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
- B# K7 `8 q; Q$ Hlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
# C$ X" P! R3 [0 q6 F+ i) g1 tthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if% G& ?+ u' }( f
the newfie would l ...

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2 C, V4 S) d6 Y) t  B0 e# M) m. S( g8 I7 ]1 n; p
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
, x7 P" j0 M2 B" D1 c6 @1 S“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,  g, ^) ~( q; T. p
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 : g0 \2 o2 d% Q* H+ P% H& y9 f
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

' K4 d1 C+ H/ _5 a- Z真博学,偶像啊。
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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1 Z/ w' F7 w; t: v- @0 C' a7 J# d% x
2 p+ F6 S3 |- t; y' k! \6 R' M; b; F! _- t& Z9 ?
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
; [7 p1 S; i4 A% n“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,# f5 u- T- K# o
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
* [5 ], W% P" z
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 3 `8 F# ?. K* t* R

# @5 L1 b2 `. x8 W2 h真聪明,偶像啊
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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 . Q4 A; w3 G8 i/ b3 t/ Y7 }+ u- {
2 z, C4 _6 x" r* z

6 e+ r; ^0 F: C- v  R" v全盘接受一下。

/ Y4 `1 I% k: V+ y( f* i! T( t真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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, S1 C) n0 |" R5 ^真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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: V4 x4 o0 v8 f0 ?* t% w' h" ]0 ?$ q  u0 n
别把我往坏路上领啊。
( L# O$ z; ?( h  o( c8 s- I
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
: N0 O/ V3 x# n2 R6 ]加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

2 q6 b. O% D: D9 E; y# c6 o多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
$ i  z* g- X) N- n- h* }
; h/ U" ^" h' v  `真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 3 q+ o/ _2 c$ K' b1 Z1 c# Q! R
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?
" x; t- M" j, C; B; Z! ]4 {9 d大学教胖还差不多 & _% R1 U5 H1 N/ d. g- g4 Z
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
& J+ h) ^/ l% V/ t. {! n紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

' [, ~! n+ l' c- g4 F- k5 m: P说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
9 m* j8 q  J; Y; g+ f$ E紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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