Never Say to a Cop:

OliveOil

NEVER SAY TO A COP:

, u3 @! r4 P* r; N! h1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)

# I; X. u# E, a+ i2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

6 b# ?, M# D' g0 Y, G* a: U- V& Q3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

. u$ z& e* a' t8 z4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

5. Are You Andy or Barney?

6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.

+ v: \* N3 X7 @$ ^7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
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8. I pay your salary!
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5 q$ D  Q$ }% B9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
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11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
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! B) o; }  Z  x% ]) X3 c; G12. When the Officer says "Gee .Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee, Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"