 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : & V5 U% u \: y! {' m; P
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. w7 f) C" y4 z
7 _# z6 E& i% E8 K. V+ z6 rWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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+ a' x' k9 Y' wIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.: H. R; ]9 d: x$ g& b2 o6 T
/ Y4 ~) n! h- `8 qLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
A! M+ W F* N$ J5 R5 b4 ymake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.$ ], |0 T. i: r: l/ ~* @% X
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. % S5 W/ F% A% G5 c8 o
8 @9 v7 T7 G+ Z% M. R9 cWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.* x! p- b4 H$ o& G$ k' d
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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! Z9 J( }7 V- y! j8 Q G3 nWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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8 |- s2 R+ l+ c3 d# v) @5 EWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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5 C( ]' A* _6 I+ P' w9 sRinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.4 |7 \' }& e! }" @! V1 w
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Turn off shower., O# S7 y2 |- q& Q8 I) ^6 _
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.) m' v5 c- m; z
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 2 l) \. U8 p. m/ i/ [" Q
! L1 V, Z; X( _0 S+ V3 iWrap hair in super absorbent towel. * m3 n1 _' m9 s" c! b7 w' F
: I. u n8 F' P1 O# x% C! oReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 4 `+ a) O: }: j3 L( u3 U8 ~
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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& m6 D, Q% g0 ZHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: 4 a8 d* R+ G& J6 `( |/ N
8 S0 E$ [; @6 s2 H) JTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. / c* {5 I$ Y- {8 m* t3 F- p
9 M j: R- g% T9 M: o. HWalk naked to the bathroom.. K0 j3 a* a: B& s) {# m
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. 8 Y! P5 J: N ]+ _. z
5 h( o% Z p) s. F3 Z8 zAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. : a6 q! \! N) i
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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6 t9 b/ Y+ ?' u, |! [Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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! ~* G/ |, x$ SFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. , g3 e w; |! O* V+ e4 e: n/ A# w
) M1 C1 }6 B1 ~1 `+ [. {Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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( i. l8 Q1 F% b0 J$ oWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 4 e8 J( M6 O. d, `+ R
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 5 J. S8 T% L& |6 v
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Pee.
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0 \0 e8 w$ }0 h: Y y$ @" URinse off and get out of shower.
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0 r, C2 l' z: E9 ~# `Partially dry off.
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* [& e0 k4 h* |+ YFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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1 d5 n% _) a5 a, Y- @+ k, cAdmire wiener size in mirror again. 3 T6 d, d: P1 I$ |% \
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. # o" @8 z2 {. W: E
: A# g* t, U6 \3 Y7 wReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. + p1 @/ x) y" I; R6 ?9 Z
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Throw wet towel on bed. 2 [" n' Y9 u. @. {2 O# i6 a
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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