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' `. n4 F" p# o& j+ zWhy did God make mothers?
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+ I l" @" A8 F. ]: ~2 `1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.' O$ A0 }. Y3 L# e7 a
2. Mostly to clean the house.
( ?3 Q7 p1 i+ x5 @7 \3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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6 D7 \1 s3 _ ]How did God make mothers? " g: u5 g b* l% e
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2 G6 u }8 |5 G8 V2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
& F+ C0 ` I5 S3 j* a6 E0 m6 O3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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7 L0 o' E' I. w i% lWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? % h: [' U$ n+ {2 t. G
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. ; B& I/ S9 }: Z @0 _, G0 N/ C
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. 3 @7 m8 q) ~1 A E/ a
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? * M% t8 r; m2 N( d) B6 M L" K
1. We're related.
) a& ]3 n" z* _: n' J$ S2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. 5 N4 q. t9 @% D8 ~/ i Q. C
~0 ?' m0 c* P DWhat kind of little girl was your mom? - V7 V, k' y- {
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. , k2 t J2 ?+ \2 V
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
7 U$ j' S$ N; Y6 a$ C3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? ( K# k5 h% E' a
1. His last name.
! k6 t6 D; `% Z/ y' b; s2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
! ?9 _; z3 f) D; v# ]3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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! R+ V, C; f$ ZWhy did your mom marry your dad? # ~6 q9 M% F2 W* a
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
: t! _) F6 k C, W2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
2 U, j$ A, r; C0 ^5 v4 ]. W3 t3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. ! D! M1 R9 E! r) ^
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Who's the boss at your house?
9 o2 C0 |2 o* ^* J( x1 z1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. ! \7 p Z6 M" b2 X( D( D* a
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
8 ] T$ C# B7 B& Y3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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What's the difference between moms & dads?
) |! A; {( g% e$ i4 `5 o1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
4 D& C( e+ ~, i7 |3 v L2 A2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them. B7 N$ A+ G# a
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. z3 h0 T" |" y2 d4 l
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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; P! R, P+ j; lWhat does your mom do in her spare time?
y ?! h3 i# Y! ?, K9 P) z1. Mothers don't do spare time.
! }& i8 y% V8 k1 t, z2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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6 y$ r9 y! h/ d) L! A+ mWhat would it take to make your mom perfect? / a% h9 a! ]0 ?9 O/ P& d6 N( x
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
4 q. S) W! Y4 K2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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# I6 T% ?5 h% M, I C0 SIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? 9 Y6 {" E! J1 V9 s5 j
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
, w# ?; ~6 q% q: a* ~7 q# \2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
' g$ l4 j- K+ B1 c/ p3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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