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7 k3 q% t5 q1 R" Q T9 V" r4 ]Why did God make mothers?+ n! ?$ N, ^* Z: M1 E* h, S5 C& f
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
% W' W3 d& i }8 Y2. Mostly to clean the house.
) j# E9 a6 G- r5 b* ^3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. : J; @2 X: w' o8 Y3 J# d1 Y
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How did God make mothers?
. A8 T+ d z+ B6 ?$ f+ C1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
% {0 t ?! c8 C% b" T7 Z* }2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. ) m9 g4 x9 Q6 w: Y7 o; \/ O7 |
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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; T2 S5 P& {8 s5 `1 R5 Z4 yWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? ' E7 y8 e/ p( \. O6 _
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. ' S, e9 j( V4 G) N6 U
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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: ?3 O& D3 }9 lWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom? ( E" S f& A" a) F+ @2 f; H
1. We're related.
6 T% y$ D# R9 U" A; m2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. 2 A5 B# I7 ~- _ L# @( G
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What kind of little girl was your mom?
8 T3 i" r1 N& n# J1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
' b! c+ d9 [0 }& f( H# o9 V2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
% w6 ], s6 F* F- y+ N2 `3. They say she used to be nice.
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5 d$ r( j7 B9 [( \6 C2 A. ]What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
; A* m/ |4 q5 y5 I$ F1. His last name.
' v( a2 N/ F3 y/ Z& j2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
: w9 y1 f2 e" v9 q+ ~3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? # R, M3 Q6 t# r( u2 g" |
! s: z2 B- n" h0 s5 [0 j7 WWhy did your mom marry your dad?
9 \8 W Y% \" \3 w; ]/ y/ _1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
% z8 n8 K, i7 o) N2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 0 b6 J) ?* Y1 A: g
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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2 k1 N2 r2 p5 [* B9 Z# WWho's the boss at your house?
* H8 F/ X: m. G$ \4 {) I& u. }1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. 4 X" A3 T- c6 f
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.- [/ c2 ?1 c( x
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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' ?6 ?. ? k6 D3 x; ^What's the difference between moms & dads?
! Y f: L) u3 _0 y0 E, x1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
& r* i& k) @9 O2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
9 ]3 f8 T1 z2 [) O3 z% T! \' s3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. m5 g0 E! x( |0 l
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. - o2 a: F$ `: j- ?2 w
) m4 ?; } _! D7 a4 OWhat does your mom do in her spare time?
N% z% N# t% I# O! n6 L0 F1. Mothers don't do spare time./ l( |# I! F8 Y3 W
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? ' m) `( T) Q6 g& o& m$ C
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.5 ^3 W: ~4 ^* ^% w) T# w
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? % m T) D- C b, B
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
# R q7 S- `7 \4 N, @2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.3 I% @% g# L# j& h( W/ e0 C
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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