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/ D# ]' W2 O& R( G) BWhy did God make mothers?' e& M0 v+ z4 A. G
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.& K% a* a" N2 r/ I; g( X3 {
2. Mostly to clean the house.
! R. b) ~$ g8 p, l0 i3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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* a1 w; X8 I! c& x% A3 `* P; |How did God make mothers? 9 u# z' l: |( Q( O6 v; ?4 T
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.0 r- Z, z- a/ k0 E9 g4 `9 s
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
' L: C) b6 X7 t: P1 X' l' j6 c3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. / Y C% P4 E) j/ K* T- z6 |# e2 L
" }4 o1 r( z1 Y8 l: cWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? 1 r! j: G/ f8 D( e& j( C
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
1 V' Z8 ^' R. }* o K5 Y2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. ( W/ ^0 g7 j/ M2 h: q
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
" f, }. ]. g* Q5 ]8 h, r0 ~; Y( n1. We're related.) J7 `) q% \" X; D7 p
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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What kind of little girl was your mom? + T4 q/ k0 c" Y! h7 w; @6 m+ z0 B4 D: v
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. 6 l- o$ W* M9 s1 {" i
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. $ Q. }$ m9 V, \5 S
3. They say she used to be nice. & }1 h: s9 F) c% X
5 C$ Y- A3 Z3 S+ b' t% _7 ]What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? - K) M* S, ^7 |9 r' E, C$ J H
1. His last name.) S: Q. F* e( ~7 @ F8 D
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
2 m8 W, x+ W9 W B4 `2 Y3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? x! Q' b! E5 P) A7 o# i; E
* i3 N i2 T6 JWhy did your mom marry your dad? ) K3 S; a, _9 D8 P
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
$ s& ]8 M @* }% T9 b- e2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
& N9 v7 \4 O% d( L, P& a3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. 9 h# y$ ?! u# J% Y, k
4 R% u3 c, o& a3 ~Who's the boss at your house? 2 W& j3 _- G' }
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. 4 P+ T' C1 S) Y( e: J# a: T
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.; N5 ~, t7 w" M
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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What's the difference between moms & dads?
% G1 o! s. Q% F/ m& @5 ~! `8 q5 V- K1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. 1 f; `( e" D6 ~& A( T
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.! g; q! f% X* N7 K
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
}( q6 g! x ]1 B& N8 e% ^5 @4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. 0 N1 ]( ^: P1 [( A- \/ e) V
+ U; W4 c$ ?0 ~- \, |% W/ ^) cWhat does your mom do in her spare time? , ~- w3 s b5 U
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2 S! P+ ~+ T- c+ D. k! m; }2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. * o$ B6 G5 G$ ~4 Y. K/ i
9 n t; f5 I# c& o; f4 B4 sWhat would it take to make your mom perfect? , n% G$ N& t8 d2 [4 X
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.( I( }- q* }3 r2 Z
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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* |1 a8 {4 w' t2 f- x0 E4 oIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
% o$ [ d8 K4 g4 d9 p, y1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 1 j Y( b1 e4 m+ O0 F
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
' {5 ^$ N; I& m( N$ `3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. ( w) j) i$ m: Z+ V- k
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