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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA; M3 s$ C( }& a i) B% O4 Z
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
% A3 p1 R! n. W8 z9 @) t$ t2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
/ Y+ W2 O e& ]# T/ |8 j3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
7 q# v1 x t5 Z g1 M4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. 0 {) h3 [) ^7 M7 Y9 ~- }. P5 @
5. Weed & K- m$ ?- O5 X$ D6 L
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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1. Big rock between you and B.C. 6 p' s7 M$ A y9 ?
2. Ottawa who?
1 C% S2 n- m2 E8 f/ S! j& s: z3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
. e- x7 t( \; y4 ]" G4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
& G1 }5 ~" @; W' j M' ^5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
, F: S0 k* O) j0 b6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. 8 ^9 e+ K$ {. \+ q- l- C4 o# c
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# h* @- E7 g7 D/ l# ]: E# tTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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; }/ o" v y4 |, y1. You never run out of wheat. ; a1 e4 W- S" J( x! ]* I8 @6 ]5 K. c n
2. Your province is really easy to draw. 6 C* j5 S2 S+ [! y- h+ p
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
+ ~7 o+ Y; E$ m7 u4. People will assume you live on a farm. $ j5 D0 k0 L9 D/ g
) r; T- x$ V- F' J7 B! a% T# ETOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA / s: N! a8 x0 e# @4 D
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. ) B# t: D1 G6 p: M$ ?
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
2 M; W# T! `1 @3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
3 r6 ^0 g* k1 p0 f* N7 |4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. ) S/ ` o3 T4 K
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by. - Z7 ~% J1 q: N' E7 `5 r
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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# |1 z- f6 W5 `$ h7 N1. You live in the centre of the universe.
) O/ U' R1 Z' V1 Y2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
0 R, f8 ], K/ Z$ R2 L3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. ; ^& t- Q, i& [5 U0 ~% D- [
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. 3 _0 }0 d: }! m2 j' {- |2 s
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& q9 t# [& P+ f0 G3 k& Z" V0 WTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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6 Z0 y7 `* \7 W2 R, d- O6 y$ k* ]1. Racism is socially acceptable 3 o8 g- j3 I6 A8 N. {( c
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. ; K5 b3 P8 v2 d7 J6 [
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. " S% t+ Q% B4 ^; v5 \
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
& {, s& }) p- STOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK 0 H5 Q9 ]1 B* {) H. O' F1 V
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. . Q+ _" [( L+ F0 w) L6 [8 Y
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
$ Q0 J9 V* ^4 i8 Y3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick % ]+ @2 n) V! A
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. / L* G: K3 [0 J9 C \5 e& J# U
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: ]9 P7 j8 `, y7 \% H0 U& p+ B7 ATOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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% l. @; h1 t5 Z, V. N6 j4 I* l1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
9 |8 o' t7 n( i* d# c2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
) @1 F# C' Z$ B! E3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND / q. X, d0 g E( ]6 Q, Z
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
( h }2 T# t- }, G) S. E7 P2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
! G% q4 r4 O9 _1 G+ U3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
1 Z* y+ i3 T; Y- F4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
/ ?. K5 k- |, b; P% f$ Y5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
- R) {; A" v. V4 l) T) p6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. 6 D, a5 o1 B4 `1 b' l/ i0 m0 F
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8 ]- P( f0 g" F8 ^$ z T& WTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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! B. i: M8 _- k) c1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
- n! `8 I4 f2 A$ I2 m2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. 1 ]" r' ?$ [/ F) l) g6 B" P
3. The workday is about two hours long. 2 e) t# T s4 u& k/ K
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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