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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. * M A5 [3 ?/ _" c7 N
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown. ) y* x4 B2 s" \! _* ? L5 \
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
0 l4 A; H/ p, b5 @6 s# Q4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. 5 h. u' A* E% O
5. Weed " ~+ F+ w+ p9 R& w+ t' u2 n! R
: i4 F% ~* s' S: M9 c6 xTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA + u J2 o0 f' u! s& `
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1. Big rock between you and B.C. 8 ?! H1 ]- q5 V4 b3 e L( y; k
2. Ottawa who?
3 z3 t$ B; v$ E5 `0 |# X3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
4 [8 y0 T8 u2 v; Z5 P0 M7 W6 X- V4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
k% g1 p0 g% ^1 |1 p, j/ L5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
. H# U1 v5 B. [; J S6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. % L" Q9 |5 ]' A2 E: V( p
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! S5 h$ C4 |: E# v3 x( @6 E) FTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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1. You never run out of wheat. , R4 i$ D! B( s6 ~" F% a
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
+ Y Z F, ^' a3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. : v2 e. F+ B9 D6 s! j4 w* s
4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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4 r9 y- ?6 X* J3 N$ K tTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA ; F! |1 K' L3 p g, [" x7 K
+ v$ K: g, Z( E3 c7 t1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. ) R9 j/ }) n( H0 Q2 x8 G' n
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. $ ~$ s7 ]- r0 G& a, G1 n( C
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. " r+ v8 Y1 B& R/ g8 a
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
) p( @+ `9 R" H% u5 N- v5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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6 k. `/ I+ H# Q/ A# ^; qTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO . ^ n9 N8 F9 |* G5 P1 l
1 B G( S& z. F( f* b1. You live in the centre of the universe.
* g* H' @& y$ \- n+ o2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. 7 {+ q( L! L ?
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
2 _; r# {, ]6 l8 p4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. ' Z9 ]. @0 A$ k4 m" K
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* W1 m* t! L, l; CTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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1. Racism is socially acceptable
9 ^. l# N' Z6 @2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. & ]* N$ t' R* h- r8 n+ n
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
8 w7 _6 Z% B$ ~7 P1 M) S& H* w5 |4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *, ^) g- k7 L2 Y. M7 w
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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, p& [. g4 J* vTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK % `1 \7 o. P: @, H; e& S% R; C0 e
+ Y( \# e9 t* ~' l* i1 R1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. 2 K# x+ K( y7 H
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. : `3 z! \. i4 h5 Q7 I: x5 j6 L
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
9 r- ^8 b7 S; G: b& b) e/ k4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. " ] Q4 R* V% c3 O
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: b" b, f. x3 @5 T* h2 X4 q7 dTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA 7 A$ G& ]! J+ H9 Y. L
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1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can. 3 w( ~+ ^, y3 U' F7 q/ s, ~8 i
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. % [# E! I, h# s. K$ W4 `
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. 0 [0 I3 L/ q: l# E. v" ^/ _ p
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND " L% k7 e, V/ i& F5 b& D# ?. D6 e
! L; w0 i k3 h- u1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. ' V, K+ l8 q5 D( ?4 v/ Z
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. ; q g( {2 l" t
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
* g9 z, N: ~! s* @2 p7 W" L4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." $ Y( O8 x- L1 m' C& ?! p
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
8 D# m5 o; T& ?6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND $ T# `: Y( U' I7 s4 S+ D: I
& \- e' U* `2 R9 Z3 X& c1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
# M$ G& k: d7 T2 a: v2 Y, z2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
X" d% d. i* M+ |, H6 Z3. The workday is about two hours long.
. C5 f( j" i$ Z: B& m* R5 ^4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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