In the garden of my heart

Dawson

听《All I want to do...》有感，涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑，见笑！
4 o9 |5 |* X* ^! R5 N" F* n
* R5 T0 W! N: H- l$ B7 iIn the garden of my heart
You planted a tree
From sunset til dawn
Through darkness to light
; G" k  Y& r8 Y& p6 yNourished with my soul
% ]7 v3 f( d8 J5 ^Devoured my sorrow by thee
  y* `# [2 g3 p( e7 x) u8 k  ^
7 m: g% a# C" dIn the memory of my life
You planted a dream
Should the sky fall down on me
8 l' w" \3 |5 GMay promises fade in the sea
* H1 A: Q) t; sSewing back every broken pieces
* M% |0 o# i4 t4 V7 h5 n+ XBursting the love out of me
0 H( x: x& v, ~# P
[mu]http://penguin.spss.sd59.bc.ca/~mqiu/images/without.mp3[/mu]

云山水月

原帖由 Dawson 于 2006-6-25 01:05 发表
听《All I want to do...》有感，涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑，见笑！
) q* |+ |: {3 L! O) N: x
In the garden of my heart
5 o! [& `' z- g! A" M* bYou planted a tree
1 Z- @' ^' R) W* o% `% z& Y# \& N: QFrom sunset til dawn
Through darkness to light
Nourished with my soul
2 |9 Y0 E5 \6 |. X3 Y2 NDevoured my so ...

眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧？

. H$ ], m% z/ A% u$ j$ t1 S写得真好。
0 F- j" Q1 |- h
& S0 b- C) C5 P: Z6 [( p; O加精加精！

Greatwall

哥们儿，你没喝多吧？没事就过来烧烟啊！

九月

汗！居然有２单词不认识。：（

Justing

原帖由 云山水月 于 2006-6-25 01:08 发表
眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧？
% Z# f3 F4 x' m  ?: G写得真好。
加精加精！

我曾在本版也发过一首英文诗

五月

如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下，在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

微澜

原帖由 五月 于 2006-6-25 05:31 发表
如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下，在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

, ^; ]- ~9 x6 m, Q% A8 z9 G+ ~- o/ Z五月JJ这个意境，想想实在是罗曼蒂克，不过在爱屯，海天相接是没有了，只有在湖畔雪山了：）

朱顺顺

Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.
0 u) P; Z* g! O2 K4 `  v0 Q
+ w5 B4 h$ f) `Sewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

Dawson

原帖由 红岫添乱 于 2006-6-29 11:06 发表
: c4 m  Q. R: R& [0 IShould the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.

Sewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

8 g- A, P0 C6 J' o
Thanks for your insightful comment, however I have to disagree with what you said.
  J  x# b; \% S1 O0 P% N
1) Sky falls down on sb. is a very common phrase or idom that's been used in a lot of occasions, meaning end of the world. For example, it was used in Savage Garden's song "truly deeply madly".

2) Every broken pieces, hmmm, again broken pieces is a phrase, I know grammar wise it looks awkard, but that "S" at the end puts a nice rythem to the poem.

月光宝盒

红岫添乱 这喜滋滋的头像虽很农民，但很喜气！很有乐在其中的意境啊！

FCUK

thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。

( r3 Z. G" F  W. Y5 IShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

五月

原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
# A/ s! z0 ]% w3 f4 ythee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
( N! O8 E+ r$ W5 P/ w
" c- V! j* \. G0 iShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

1 ]% D0 V- r4 L/ a
: ^' u! V5 h+ Q2 v" y/ p诗歌, 重在意境和语感, 没有那么严格教条的语法要求吧.

Dawson

原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
# K) l% V  m6 t  f, B) {6 {thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。

Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

有啊，有很多经典的例子。
* [& ^: k- c4 I9 V% T0 n( F
) n! ^7 u" R' |3 C7 O1 D( o比如Sharon A. Bryington那首著名的《While Waiting For Thee》
6 N5 ^% e, E  S) h) Y6 ?
Don't weep at my grave
For I am not there,
& a5 v8 i1 [5 l  }: h) q  HI've a date with a butterfly
3 S3 X. v! r' R- r' E0 TTo dance on the air.
4 A1 |$ d% o5 L2 p. bIf I'm missed, find a flower,
I'll be there too,
Sniffing it's fragrance
Right next to you.
+ x6 t* h8 x4 X4 V5 Y' _/ I3 H& W
- J0 p/ Z7 I" S0 GDon't be sad
3 b2 S- H( j& lWhen you remember me,
For I'm singing in the sunshine,
Wild and free,
Flirting with the lighting,
Playing tag with the wind,
: u+ m7 p( ^, J; uChasing the thunder
Time and again,
+ r" O+ B% L: o- W  ]2 n3 D. ~Soaring with the eagle,
8 l$ J" m; }# {! P) _Swimming in the sea,
Enjoying all of nature
While I'm waiting for thee.