 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!: o) e6 P t) W4 @2 }/ h7 i) D
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写5 R! @! N* T: v% C! T) v2 k7 n
% V7 k1 s* T$ s+ J1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
9 L; M$ W7 T1 q* V) [, ?( x% y6 y1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫% t! q) g, D* z2 l1 f3 K
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
1 {& `6 k! ?* F; ndown. N+ i" Z% ~% | \9 S) D/ J
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about / r1 f$ t i, V& k
you
% w, N& ?0 `3 g; K( S# x, W! aleaving it down.
7 Y: z( [7 h# |- a6 D1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？9 l8 Q |) ~2 J1 J: ~- l6 ]
: S3 h/ W* F: D0 \8 _* z4 d1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.0 P1 z' U- ?+ _) A8 _8 j
Let it be.
% f K* M& Y C- A9 F" x" L r1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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9 {; f: j' q& c* E1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
( ?4 @* ~8 Y/ e- O0 v. }3 F. b2 Hthat way.4 h+ Z9 @3 R" [9 H
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.; ]2 `. p; k' L/ }% K5 B" n4 Q
1，哭泣是敲诈
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7 U/ P0 }. b5 ]/ p6 i8 y P J1. Ask for what you want.' y. Y4 Q+ A: ~& V, \0 z
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!( w' n4 x2 f+ o& L# x- l. i5 [6 F
Strong hints do not work!
/ p0 l: t$ Z8 Q, ~8 n) O/ I& TObvious hints do not work!( k: w* a ~. V; X
Just say it!
% A3 @, U& }/ f) j8 [1，你想要什么就说
7 q* R- y7 R8 M* C" t8 A我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！* b. k& ?5 t9 u8 x
* [$ r" R2 C6 h" V* ~( x1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every ' s' y7 T5 `4 j3 k
question.
. k F# X+ G( r' K8 H1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）: S) c! m! r4 H! ?
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
) z/ ^/ X, o/ ^7 {) [5 swhat we do.9 A' w$ r- S7 b) S! \+ A
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
6 Z- ?' U8 a4 \& k3 M1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。" Q7 F" R. @, a s4 C5 W
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.( H+ o0 p/ D% L' G- f+ Y" |
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去. j' |. F) Q8 L3 K" Y
4 g+ o9 D, Z% u9 E8 W2 I3 G8 [1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
( z1 `/ ~+ e! S) J" s; pIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
6 x- @7 S. O7 y我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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8 j; O9 e. A+ \2 E7 ~1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
2 K. a- _7 ~6 E3 xto act like soap opera guys.) F) u6 u6 T6 |% q4 \( y
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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% R: Z5 c' {8 L/ z3 P! a$ D1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
8 Y7 N, `7 M- t+ \2 I8 N9 e& h1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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8 g; G. R T. \/ N1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
* O+ V8 b* n: @* V& vmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.* {; p% M. Z0 i! U Q" ^
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。/ o o' i% p! ^& ~! r. S
" p; ^/ m5 I; Z# a8 L2 }8 L（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）3 @: K# |; z* c" i
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it3 n+ J7 D% L/ w) Y1 `
done. Not both.0 N* U2 f- b' ~* {5 Z8 m8 g
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
' n; {" G1 K9 r$ M# Mcommercials.
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.3 U/ v* ^: V; L" }1 _9 ~
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
' i8 m* b# ?) e" IPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
K8 V: z' f+ ]+ PWe have no idea what mauve is.4 b4 o) L8 S5 ?( ] D* b4 o
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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% W. s. j! R- T* F$ ^* @1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
' ^! w. P( {; k5 v* knothing's wrong.! [: u% g6 A( O; W( O
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.1 i; Z( F+ q! |+ v" w% Q8 [
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer6 O7 a* f5 _; d7 p1 r/ k
you don't want to hear.
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" b6 F3 I" C- M5 z0 ]2 A1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
X$ @ c9 V# i1 gfine...Really.1 p, A, p. P, N l6 K* E% D7 O
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
& V" F( J9 E/ |1 ~6 [discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.0 t5 @) q# `- Z5 e; N& }
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1. You have enough clothes.' c, G6 N% ]$ W
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1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!0 H0 l2 X# G( J% L
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1. Thank you for reading this. Z4 n; F3 e) J- P. K" B' X
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
2 J3 n- q4 U5 b$ wBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.3 p# p8 W# I* N, y/ ^. y F- I
- A K" [& v6 s) q* f( B5 T8 |Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
: `/ A* \. d9 S1 r. d3 KPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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