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呼应海尼尼:一个男人的心声

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鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!2 @4 P9 M0 p& t7 L8 }; N
请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写
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: D: w0 ~/ {" s5 U0 f, _! }9 w7 ~1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
1 @, w- {: \$ R9 A& @1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫0 \" H7 l. B0 Y+ |0 s2 m3 G

8 s1 r& H/ w$ E/ x1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it- A* ~, [( N# @" i9 Q! g
down.9 {8 ~* d& @1 i, K5 R* g/ w
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about 1 C* c) V$ s6 U# n: B' E
you
% v1 N$ Z: E8 d5 c9 z6 r9 o- a& \leaving it down.
! @" `! {& Q0 P' U! ]' B$ n6 E1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?- ?6 K1 n2 l3 r; O

% ]! z5 q' U' M: i4 `% @2 J1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
3 ]3 d( W$ v, H) ]; k# BLet it be.5 l# S5 K9 Q- z* H
1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去/ i$ \+ \2 @. ~; \3 g0 J- Z
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it: t% z( C) P$ d, J  B# \
that way.' h. I4 H4 f5 c) Y4 x
1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!1 w( X- u- I/ @1 p6 N# d1 p; j
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1. Crying is blackmail.7 ]" \' d$ H2 X
1,哭泣是敲诈+ m$ p8 [' n& F, [6 K" L3 Y
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1. Ask for what you want.
  L- T- W. w8 q$ F& JLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!+ n$ j2 m( y- n% u: s
Strong hints do not work!. f! ?/ C+ S' t# ^
Obvious hints do not work!
5 T6 s2 r9 ^5 N: vJust say it!
9 O% [1 y) [& P  S1,你想要什么就说
. R4 C7 k+ W0 Z- P6 [我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!/ V- u9 m' ?6 l  T1 F  d8 Z% ?! E) [
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
8 N( n6 i: p6 H* d) [question.
9 s* ]  }/ g5 e* O6 ^$ |1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)
/ K* A9 p) k$ k: @. Y6 ^2 c1 }9 U) c/ ]3 M% ]$ R$ i
1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it.  That's! t( N: J6 U+ j( l2 b
what we do.
/ |3 }8 l$ Y) p, m4 z9 B- p4 bSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.+ K% ^! u& H* L9 }8 G; G
1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。
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8 [- S" z. ]; q0 _1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.  See a doctor.
. A: I/ E4 S0 R8 k; w) ^/ Z+ J1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.1 B& T& H7 I5 V# }/ O5 x
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
! r1 n4 b' R; \  k我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了5 M5 ]# R! n! l& l

. n1 z# S0 f) ^  [' Y2 a  Y1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
4 G6 F$ H3 s- |) y8 D) Gto act like soap opera guys.
1 J% L' w" ~# S7 B- X5 c' _1 I: X1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们/ g& _3 G$ }5 R# P/ u
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.; d7 }) q& D' {! B
1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们
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9 h$ J$ j. Z5 a/ C7 ]1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
$ i0 S6 \' P" W0 Fmakes you sad or angry, we meant  the other one.
1 h2 x" D% r, _7 W" N+ C, s8 K1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。  G3 F" g7 [& F. ^0 {' q1 B
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(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢)
. g1 L  h5 @& ^1 v/ p7 B7 H1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
+ b  k7 \# W; R' J2 F& \( zdone. Not both.1 `8 l' g; Y  f. C
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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% V6 d( f" o3 q% P6 i1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during# U0 B# d# M& ~9 Q" N" J( L& t
commercials.
: X9 S9 A, ^8 B0 i# [: q! q/ c: @
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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5 s0 S( j- m& Q$ v, l5 i& C; |1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
% |1 h$ H9 O! n/ C. e) D5 q7 hPeach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
$ i+ Y' M. I0 I& {3 D1 D( kWe have no idea what mauve is.
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+ T/ w& W3 Q& S% _6 b2 n9 \. a1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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9 _5 e1 c' F* G/ R2 }8 Q: i1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like/ u' j2 x; h/ V0 f( O
nothing's wrong.
8 }6 Y6 J. p$ }5 PWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
, t# @8 b, b* j2 q% M5 T$ O6 z( |& j: Y( C$ l6 \. _
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer' V9 b  ?' G, x; y1 G$ N
you don't want to hear.- z4 @: J- l& y
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is5 M2 l3 b& X) u2 C
fine...Really.
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$ C  a7 q: j9 L6 X  y7 u1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
$ \; Z9 L7 u+ R% R. G% }discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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$ E$ H" G! i" N2 f1. You have enough clothes.$ P' n' u% b# W! _1 Q2 w' r6 k+ c* @

% g3 ^& Q4 _# w7 @1 }2 Z' m1. You have too many shoes.) K1 F# u/ c# n6 ~1 q% P/ u

0 K' O- K5 s' C8 h- ]1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!
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/ W4 ^9 Y! O  ?$ f" h  C; E8 h+ W1. Thank you for reading this.7 J4 c/ g+ z. M* ?# A/ ?6 o
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;, p" H" [$ o; Y9 X) A
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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" N: F7 p4 f( }6 }Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
" P* X: c, D1 {1 I, M; }" B  @Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06 | 显示全部楼层
funny
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:10 | 显示全部楼层
试试哈。
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" a8 S" H) F9 ]1.You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want itdone. Not both.If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.你或者让我们去做事情或者告诉我们你想怎么做,但是千万别同时要求我们。你如果知道怎么样做最好,那么自己个儿做吧。
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8 m) l% a$ g0 b$ R* E* b( ~1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?4 q; D2 i' V8 m; o
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9 o. W0 o4 n* |4 v1 k1 |1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.* a- J( O" z; c  T- M( a6 A: X
我们和克里斯托福。哥伦布一样不需要指导!
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.% r% O6 r; I& e6 l
所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。+ W1 G4 P* |1 j9 c* J) E

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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
8 F" b( g0 o0 F1 O+ v% E& b如果痒了就挠挠,我们就爱做实事。* g: q* \- I0 X: h, y5 E! d

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2 D4 _* F2 I1 b" g6 a! i0 ]1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act likenothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.1 b# p; E( d0 [4 Q7 X# o
如果我们问发生什么事了?你说没事,那就没事啊。我们知道你们在撒谎,可是那根本不值得讨论。. C# T2 Z- R; r3 |+ y

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0 k% r/ Z2 J$ M* B1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answeryou don't want to hear.% w- E5 }( }) y
如果你一定要问一个你不想知道答案的问题,那么就别指望能听到你想要听的答案。
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 04:10 PM:
' ]% Z7 K7 k8 v: @2 ZALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.
9 C" W) m9 C8 _所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。3 z3 T4 G* O" W9 Q6 T# [$ n

; f  P) V7 ~" _  P这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Isfine...Really.- r9 ^' ~- t% i& N% [, Z& d" I
如果我们要去哪里,你无论穿什么都绝对很好。。。真的不骗你
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' t7 X- m4 H6 X, ]1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared todiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.3 J0 A0 }- V/ Y
不要问我们在关心什么,除非你已经可以讨论诸如棒球、橄榄球或高尔夫等话题。
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1. You have enough clothes.( g( T0 I+ Y! \& I/ C/ V; `0 M+ b' v
你的衣服足够多了, i7 X7 e5 B, s- M* x6 H% d5 L

& r7 V) r: o6 k* k- J  @1. You have too many shoes., ?" X: N. r! a- \" J: p
你的鞋子也太多了吧& F& Z. H6 j" `6 Y% j8 V6 _" r
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1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!
% o4 z7 O. [6 a' E% a我很有型啊,你能说球型不是一种型吗?
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1. Thank you for reading this.
1 d3 j+ F2 |& |! ^( @  A多谢你能看完这个
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' n# a$ R' ]- eYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
, g) ?* S+ t3 o- Q! N我知道今晚我得睡沙发了,但你知道吗,男人们一点儿都不会介意这个的,不就是野营嘛。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:28 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 三思 at 2005-11-11 04:26 PM:: S$ ~+ N  _) E3 ^2 B  ^9 e2 S

# i; c" i* r% K3 ^9 N% }: ^这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置; f0 U6 \- z7 X- A0 j1 B" k

9 O5 N7 ]9 Y; n# o7 q( h- s) e还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
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" j( m6 y0 }! ^( [应该说还是海妮妮心眼实,办好事。嘿嘿, w# \6 a: |6 j- x  {
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玩玩,献丑了哈
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:35 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
最后一句真绝阿
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1394) 鸡蛋(16)
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 03:26 PM:! o" F: H1 I: p" l7 Y1 E2 W" g
1. You have enough clothes.2 u* ~/ p, T7 z
你的衣服足够多了. P  ~6 J. _% t+ g: T% Y3 |

- ]1 n' z8 O3 M  g* o6 Y+ @: Y1. You have too many shoes.
9 W: z4 ?9 D0 t% ~* A0 Q你的鞋子也太多了吧

" ?1 q# J% _+ \8 c- C3 U& u这两句话我经常对LD说,但是她说NO。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 17:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 17:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
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" L! p9 F9 _$ I2 `' x----这句话我劳工常说,我就。。。。忍了。尤其看《幸存者〉的时候,电话都不接。但是观看期间他可以跟我说话,不许我说
鲜花(10) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 20:39 | 显示全部楼层
1. Ask for what you want.
% z4 v6 w: Q' |Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
) [$ S! t+ ]0 W$ I8 E/ Q3 SStrong hints do not work!( {  a4 q6 u, |; N* E' d! S4 t
Obvious hints do not work!
% u/ G1 N' A8 W, mJust say it!
- L1 k& f: m8 x; e7 G1,你想要什么就说0 `7 d, P" j' e9 ^  ?' m: j- ]( h
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!% P( n" b# w( u  [7 E

% b5 F# N' L7 |9 l- z8 V关于这一条,我老公只认准了一条hint,只要我在晚上洗了澡,头发湿淋淋的下楼和他说话,他就坚决认为我是在暗示他炒饭了!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 蓝海 at 2005-11-11 09:39 PM:# W: |0 U) [$ a+ X
1. Ask for what you want.
4 f! I6 C. I6 l+ `3 o8 J4 |# LLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
8 n/ j8 {1 n. \1 WStrong hints do not work!
6 G$ M* Y/ M* y# D& VObvious hints do not work!5 \9 P5 h1 O0 H( s
Just say it!( g6 D6 v& I8 {
1,你想要什么就说$ Z  f  \! K. Z9 J: k: h* M
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管 ...
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3 I5 ]/ H  Y; |- m0 A瓦赛
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 00:49 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 09:33 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 01:49 AM:
% p* a* v! A  y5 H/ B9 j1 w* V被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????

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0 w4 Z, K" H; E咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿9 c) A/ d3 D8 @& F) S

' I9 }7 n' o# h. O4 A4 V% V) ohttp://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 15:59 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-14 09:33:' c7 H9 F6 c& b: d2 F0 A" g, |

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2 j# l, t$ @& F1 I; Z咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿" L7 ?  D$ T! k  p) Q

# K- X7 w4 ~$ {3 o! Y( Thttp://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。
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# e; z6 W& f9 @& v5 f, e还想问问你的体会呢!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 16:21 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 04:59 PM:
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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。
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& t. h0 i' L" w, M5 F& @还想问问你的体会呢!

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3 H! k" R7 `3 N, m8 n/ m) v3 s- m
( A. y7 r; [/ u3 ~% @! R体会?5 G( ^9 N% N/ Z3 M

9 ]8 i. R1 v7 J; h% \回答到那个帖子下面了
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