 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!; s5 r- ?+ W1 m: \6 a$ Z( I( N6 B
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写. b4 R. c5 r0 t% U+ `3 _
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
; Y' Y' V8 m9 p0 |1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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2 d- F9 z! a+ V1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
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We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
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leaving it down.9 a% i+ f0 B, b* m6 S; _
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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. ~+ q; Z5 q( ?3 O6 o6 [5 S1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
+ |; S' x" L8 g% p* YLet it be.8 i, l, `1 Y( o, R5 l, x
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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2 N' |5 J3 r0 O! i) X( l# _( Z0 m X1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
" J: u+ a3 A3 k% K$ K9 b5 vthat way.
; [; h" _/ q+ q, q0 N" q" T1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！! Z) J! P4 Y$ ^1 a
4 y3 F! u+ ] @1. Crying is blackmail.
" v& }, n5 b( a' D2 u1，哭泣是敲诈; y: P* h* @& [6 ^; c7 r+ u
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1. Ask for what you want.
2 b- Z* `0 r0 oLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
# T/ t3 W/ H5 F" z* k4 kStrong hints do not work!. ?, `( o8 f- |* f4 n3 }; ]
Obvious hints do not work!
' t1 P' ^9 _$ f0 _0 `% Y |Just say it!
! t) y; w( _7 q/ q6 w5 u( ^3 Y$ l$ O1，你想要什么就说
2 g# h; n& W% a, j我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！+ a. S3 x' |. {- ?2 w; b& A
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
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1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）+ _1 o' q3 Y) s. R3 V6 ]
2 y1 }8 b3 m3 w1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's/ J( F1 J0 v: g' S" x: r- F
what we do.
v! {7 J" @2 p& L( Y. z. PSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.) X" A* }3 a* X6 {8 l ^9 x* m m2 J
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。. i& e1 d! _. h" r f. S. h
( { j; U# x! J' _& i5 H1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
. Z; W7 D) W6 s4 `: U( I* m1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去8 E. D+ b9 I- J3 P6 z w! z
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. n9 W- V# U3 ~
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
8 r+ ] `8 T5 g% K我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了& e2 ]5 T7 W' j2 \3 j! a. M3 g3 \
0 f7 b9 G+ c- q' j1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
. k# c+ V0 l0 l4 n+ M& [$ ^! Pto act like soap opera guys.
$ P9 P! k# D4 Y3 j1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们0 |4 Y, f, `6 a8 G9 ~ W% X w9 o
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.( |0 l+ s# W' E8 \
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们 A7 g* w& v7 @% q4 X
: S# C' |4 w! h% G0 C# }! i- Y1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways. h; b( `8 i6 Y5 ~& z) z
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.- E4 B q p: s3 H" c- w0 S8 b
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。4 M0 P o" D8 L/ i2 L7 g
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）8 T+ h2 J* q" _- G0 f% C
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
" s7 e7 N8 X# q( q/ |* l5 sdone. Not both.
% p0 G: Q. f* E5 XIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.% |' ?- C2 r: U' ~" F0 Q! \
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during* ~* W+ p B8 b
commercials.
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.1 l; ~, S- {6 c, `
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
2 O, ?: w3 Q) T( J" MWe have no idea what mauve is.- T" |7 Z! N) i2 u
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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& H9 @6 L& H r5 A( t' o1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like/ ~. I# ^7 O, h M8 ^" ?! w
nothing's wrong.9 K5 B' x# ^3 l# @: u
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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5 o5 i7 Z8 o7 P$ L# H1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
& f R# F+ L, A9 eyou don't want to hear." S' V$ i: V9 F4 X+ c. Z
# H# G+ E3 N6 B1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is) e" f( H/ C* p0 s. D
fine...Really.0 k7 W8 a2 @/ U( t
1 u3 t2 w: l- U) y1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to; h4 C P: e6 X" g
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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7 C, r7 x5 \2 v: ]8 s1. You have enough clothes.
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1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!8 \2 V) B4 b* \# v
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1. Thank you for reading this.; k7 y' ]/ l( l" v1 _7 s
4 e& s# @" J0 V$ ]6 tYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;( P& I% j+ w& U6 h$ x4 c4 T
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
3 Q1 L$ x3 h' x5 ]; p( n: SPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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