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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
% N3 C( }' v& I0 ?6 @4 d7 P; jbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
4 M. a/ C% W0 y: R4 ~the other possibility.
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k5 a c7 V$ w3 q" {' mAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
2 Q0 X, H$ } x) j) @# R+ Gspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in. i/ y) N5 j" X7 |# ~/ Z; P5 E8 i
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".6 s1 @) b' v7 j
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
$ r r8 g# \$ d; Jthe sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up6 q0 A9 z0 x: g
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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1 h' U \3 H% O) X3 C# q, r9 r' o+ sThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the* |1 p$ f! H# r. ~( H' |) R# r" V9 ~
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like q! m P- e" x) u' ^( @
fotograf 20% shorter.4 q- i. d% L4 d0 f5 p( R6 k
. r5 E; e& d4 [4 y4 A1 mIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to/ `" G9 C# I0 u$ Q& [- K& G
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always+ j3 L* }6 u! i" Z" s( {
ben a deterent to akurate speling.5 X* T, q4 A5 T: X% ^1 O0 s
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
. b* p7 u; ?: b( u1 jdisgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
8 n) E2 @1 }7 s+ P. z% g- v"z" and "w" with "v".
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/ R9 x! |) a) @3 oDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and7 O: X! X% ?2 q+ g" b
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.3 p6 E& g: @$ C7 A( u9 u5 f
) e. S! Z0 v2 a% _; s9 Q" tZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
8 B* w. I6 Z% j, u* j9 D ~ r1 Punderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
V- E1 |2 [$ B, n! |5 UUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze- v* y7 w5 [7 ?% B
forst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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