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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will9 ~) j! _7 n6 i7 q9 K( k
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was4 y6 R/ ^& r, I
the other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
0 H- K/ e" m4 H$ D3 D" }! A c$ \spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
& v8 ]. E* a6 z! t+ q3 ]plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".* o# f" ~+ r3 [# [' h
/ r |4 K) I! ^$ OIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
7 C: `' b9 Q M7 U2 u7 s- @$ S* gthe sivil servants jump with joy.- W9 H. \0 `5 h/ ~" q# Z; r3 V' {* Y
( k7 ?; ^9 e. g& I3 y/ DThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up, E, a! i. {" u2 Y F$ u
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
, \% \- f6 A" ~: Y% n# Q9 |troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like* }. Q4 C1 @, R; O& h6 }% ?
fotograf 20% shorter.
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# e8 f8 B6 q e) \# m9 gIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to; M+ d% ?' Z( `: Y ~
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible./ v1 X9 K( W2 X% S& Z
5 K* c# p2 n: r9 Z% p+ ?" QGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always4 F8 K0 d' f" q3 g3 i' |. J. ?+ ?3 k
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
2 h9 o3 Z: |& w4 I" s* `disgrasful and it should go away.* k1 |1 ^1 b2 N1 v- k8 ?2 w8 T
& S8 W6 O& O- @By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with5 u/ `/ _ T( ?* z
"z" and "w" with "v".
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2 I" W7 z" i5 \During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and, _. p; ?0 Y! r$ L% @" i
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.0 ~: V6 Q* E+ s6 T% d5 g5 ?
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
. }8 {" o* Y! H$ n9 cunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.! E' \$ {* b+ n5 y' y x# M- D: c
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze9 v* a, l# b# L: P2 ]3 w0 x
forst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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