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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will0 f5 ~7 U2 V* f. Z3 U: \- a [
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was" l; q [/ B s, i6 A
the other possibility./ v6 K4 f. z! k
- ]2 ?4 N% F# k# x5 w; zAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
) F9 H$ }$ r$ \spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
) N. a. D# a. G# h4 t2 gplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make5 o! g/ k# G$ ~+ K
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up$ N3 Z% r r6 P# w
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.! I8 ^4 k U9 v, q, O' }+ v
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; G `; c S( S- g/ [9 A) [" g/ aThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the- v1 w/ }6 |6 J+ @
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like, K" P4 e- \/ o) p! X, S/ e+ z
fotograf 20% shorter.
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* v, C7 ` ^, i% {& LIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
3 S/ Y: o) a8 ]reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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) m- i* B8 K9 g3 F2 v, BGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
4 u1 D1 B& O6 b; I6 e+ w1 Uben a deterent to akurate speling.
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8 ?& z, b9 P' EAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is& t4 B" n, k8 d) m' K) u
disgrasful and it should go away.! u* I* D7 h. T8 m# p
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
' g: I1 z" Z( m) J9 K"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and5 G2 H; p& q" c# \3 [4 U0 U
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.+ y/ k8 j' F' e7 y, a( U3 }# C/ u
+ @7 ~( D) G. V7 z( x! oZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
, t0 f: d% I' N+ [understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.+ p. i, j& s1 B- `
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
- e M! d; w# g9 {7 O, bforst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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