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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will0 ?" y4 A2 y" `5 V0 U. p, i( U8 M5 T
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
/ @$ p3 @: B) k" s# gthe other possibility.. ^0 D" m6 a* N' \0 K7 _7 h' x( z& t3 y
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English5 M. T: m3 u- j( V% _3 E9 j
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
( H* R/ h8 e4 J/ Vplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish". P3 n* }9 f: J$ F' }5 C% a
- q) M; S8 D6 n- j' Y9 Y5 HIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make( p; j* U8 C' h& R! J3 A
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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, w$ O/ s7 ]; I a' G: k6 ?The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up5 u8 o: V& g/ O) R& r* c
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
# V- {6 {4 s8 Z' {; d" ttroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like$ v. O+ u8 O6 J9 `- L3 G
fotograf 20% shorter.# d) ^6 R+ g0 t
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
" `& L6 R( O; H; \reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.! h6 }, ^2 S; V
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always8 C; l h6 Y% w' M/ Z
ben a deterent to akurate speling.0 r2 I( z% o# u, O
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is3 a) K1 K8 u; z; A* j
disgrasful and it should go away.& p' f5 Z3 b! { a. q, F: }7 k
- v$ ~9 _/ O3 G b. eBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
# Z& \4 m0 u# k" G1 V `4 G" ["z" and "w" with "v".* W: `2 o# h5 b4 _
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and+ e2 z4 q8 `: g
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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( R% e% N! P# ]* e% k+ R" eZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu* K2 @+ _4 h) ~( L6 {0 N& n
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.( o+ b9 u' j7 u; l9 j& f
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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