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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will6 h& E* A f9 L# _. H/ Z' o
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was( h$ J0 J; R. T! Q2 A
the other possibility.* W" s5 p( D* }" M
: Q( o) b0 H1 N+ ZAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English7 Q9 T) r3 N4 o0 y; P1 L
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
- \: E8 @' o* Y; Aplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
( u, V# S7 P" t; X# t1 {the sivil servants jump with joy.
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- C7 U! {8 c4 Y2 l. c4 eThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up' c# _7 \& }# H9 h7 i5 U
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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+ t2 S! P+ s. I" t# d# nThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the0 f! T( R6 \! P; ? k' _8 g& E b
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like/ ?: h& N: |3 A% N' L
fotograf 20% shorter.4 R" _+ |* r- }) l
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to9 B7 e/ y# U$ C) k0 ?
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
- T% f4 O( @% W6 Z; t9 W9 Fben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is9 L' @$ Y* F: U8 X$ X# x
disgrasful and it should go away.. r! g% \+ i* G5 P
; A! i" S; n$ d5 U2 e* tBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with" ]) ]4 g) @" r" R! s$ Y
"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
+ r/ {8 @0 t# @+ @0 tafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.3 f. i5 ?1 ^9 ^
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu& k0 H3 a: N. v1 s4 z( w
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.% c0 I6 u. |3 Y3 G; y
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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