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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will5 |7 T& Y7 r/ @$ p
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was- S C. f: U: P2 T2 C: n: I
the other possibility.9 s9 k9 {! d7 {1 L# c, P* c; R6 b
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English5 j+ W4 z. A. ^0 t' z. \( {
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in F; K( U8 L( U# @4 q x- `
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make; L h+ W$ A2 t" `
the sivil servants jump with joy. z0 j0 p& `) K5 T9 h
) n8 U6 k$ `, J0 |8 ~ C" qThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up. ]- w" c6 l, `+ O7 y
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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5 N% M8 L$ e; s' |( gThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
) r, F/ v0 j1 l( `- c- B5 gtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like4 b6 X! D7 w+ C: s8 x/ P
fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
! f3 f5 W9 E) {7 e$ o3 F' |9 rreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
2 W% x) L% K; S6 [ben a deterent to akurate speling.) d0 _$ C9 w/ L3 M* t1 n
- f/ W" X9 v9 F2 k) }( m/ aAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is- C1 V7 ]5 W _
disgrasful and it should go away.
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- v7 r+ e8 p! V* h" {By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with- j7 n* y8 \# A% Y( m: q4 H$ q1 o' A
"z" and "w" with "v".' q3 S1 ^- g% F C! ^7 {
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
& G) S; E1 m, V- Lafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.: _7 U& }6 [3 j7 v" g/ x
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
- y: n* G1 J3 _/ Cunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
- K* F, s) |0 _Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze: C5 L! j( {/ ]0 M& f! [: Z
forst plas.
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* P0 V0 P% J3 @8 DIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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