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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will) r4 H. p# Z0 w8 t) N
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was2 a3 g! e" p+ U4 p% o2 e! m4 U
the other possibility.9 n3 Q7 [- E7 K: N
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
5 O8 i; G- y; \) O" u8 \% h9 P- ^spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in. e( s/ m3 K6 e! y, C6 I4 ]7 S
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
1 B: K C) h. D7 R( ?# g7 y, X2 Uthe sivil servants jump with joy.% t/ _! \6 I$ B
# Y+ I r% A+ `8 Y8 V/ e# \/ RThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up; T% @) f) p; m) |9 ]- r: L% z% k9 a
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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7 E. M8 F8 T! {7 y: u: r2 MThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
# l6 X6 I: m3 |) gtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
9 b0 O" y; ~+ o* \/ ~. rfotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to* @2 g3 I% N4 b. Y5 g8 b* B/ h
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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6 r }% |' A; P' k* h/ ^; ]) bGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
8 T5 S' z* B; a& J7 D, cben a deterent to akurate speling.
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/ m5 j1 y) D0 R. Q8 }6 E- ], NAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is* o4 `& M* ]: }8 E. T! y
disgrasful and it should go away.& C ?7 A+ z/ {! r+ }6 }
" p( i5 x* X! P q3 c+ w; zBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with, [# D% E6 d$ M( U: @+ C1 s
"z" and "w" with "v".5 o* p, I; q8 a& y- [% w2 c4 M% O
d8 k4 ]) X U: N2 g& y! a) f' }During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and/ P* Y; P8 `' {4 y
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.+ }+ U; O- z. H$ f0 e4 @+ F: E
) l" n* ~( y- S" \) GZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu% s; n l" v5 V" V& j# R9 V6 f
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.4 h. I5 }1 r4 p1 c% a
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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