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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will# [- I' u }9 `2 R! {
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
7 L2 M' L, d. t6 _the other possibility.: D2 L3 W4 x2 V( A8 h. [0 g
8 { K1 X u- ^) M0 w* hAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English; Y, G) ^# k+ ~* D& _
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
8 n# k0 ~! T- {plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".. P, \7 l7 X7 y7 I% @: q O
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
/ Z. C/ j% Z3 }% Y( i* z( k0 _the sivil servants jump with joy." u3 }; R0 O! F6 [7 @" @+ n, E
3 |, k) F' }, F/ A7 @The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
1 Q1 o* j2 D% P) v( u8 [konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.5 h: q7 @0 b; Q& W
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+ n3 n5 J0 u4 DThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the o7 ] {: q9 w
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like3 P, l# Z7 T% l, e1 Q" |! b
fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to& J$ O) y* Y I$ b
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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# k* `0 Y$ H8 M3 yGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always7 j% S' c& S, {0 R0 V
ben a deterent to akurate speling./ n$ q+ \: L: w5 y
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is0 \: M/ e, X6 C* w! A0 b; l
disgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with( g% s% j2 `9 Z* p/ ^
"z" and "w" with "v". O1 Q& s4 \% z7 ?# A( U
( z1 _- ~4 R, z! aDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and( O8 v2 L! V, l7 R; F1 n9 U
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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: |: \/ }0 t9 K) oZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
( D7 I1 _# J9 H ^3 ?1 junderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
3 o4 f, x6 y/ a2 i& g5 p) XUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
# l, u; h* y( N8 |9 D2 c6 eforst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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