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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will0 [9 e0 j; P+ z
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was! Q% Y! ?% ~ F5 r |, B, D; x
the other possibility.6 W9 _. T; i+ X3 k4 d
( B8 j+ r9 Q3 Q& |' I! B( yAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
/ D1 T2 o- M7 I5 o8 ~! Xspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in- A; L. w3 s# c6 ]% J
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish"." [1 h7 j3 }' [% l- ~! P s) y
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
; T" W: W% U- b& f# Y% Hthe sivil servants jump with joy.
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) T5 g9 H! R6 y: [. Z9 [, y- b% BThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up N4 Q) G6 l' A3 c- a# j" G3 s
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.- l$ h6 v9 C: y/ H
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, {' M. m1 s& @% l. b0 cThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
$ E1 G8 |7 H: \6 y N% Rtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
/ ?! ]* I+ A! Y0 Xfotograf 20% shorter.
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6 d0 w7 h5 V# |; `" [6 CIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to9 W0 g. v8 ~. G! A2 A! e! s3 B9 V
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always: ]* A3 A! n; k5 E0 J/ q; ]+ d
ben a deterent to akurate speling./ o/ F& e% T: D0 E, z
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is0 c& D5 c% ^7 `, n @
disgrasful and it should go away.) V- F R' s( }: i5 c
( l2 @3 H3 h% _) y6 B9 H$ tBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and7 M( c7 F/ s4 \6 x7 u k
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl./ \( H3 Q+ l6 x$ n0 p
9 L7 V# Y( R" G# ]. j5 |) aZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
& U! O3 }& ~# c- Q0 k4 O3 K. F+ A/ Iunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.& N* S/ h0 {6 H4 j0 c
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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