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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will0 Y7 \0 ?2 a$ j) Q
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was& z3 S- g0 M: J# ~3 l
the other possibility.. A% M7 T: X( C( M" ^; u
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English& `4 h, f! |, x9 m8 v! o1 v" t
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in* C! D; A7 `" o: w- H
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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% v4 K3 e( g5 m: X4 B* j/ MIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make; F/ M8 j5 r+ `: |9 y1 s& x6 S* |
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
2 X4 x) `- r; A$ hkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.7 ~; s {! t& P |# P
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
2 K ?* n$ t& ~6 Q& |, a: m" Etroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
+ H# K4 e& | E `2 Efotograf 20% shorter.5 I a7 ^: u8 p+ i( D8 i
8 \" c6 |/ }- J; y0 K. Z% \& ]In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to, a1 J- t/ T w( h
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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4 n6 Q: N5 l# R: @! U% K7 \Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always! E7 [: o6 D* e- X% B
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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# d) W7 M, T/ w- X; s# M! O7 YAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
$ G6 s7 o; ?1 ] l, n+ Q, q: ydisgrasful and it should go away.; z# O- W/ N6 M5 q8 U
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with1 N1 e7 M4 r& C- R% F
"z" and "w" with "v".
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2 F; E" C1 S- S9 ^2 {) VDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
' q% c9 Z5 u+ k' x: p8 t. oafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
( r0 x2 [; _0 f. q& N3 \understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.; W! {# S5 o' k: n0 }
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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