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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
' f6 E& A" e4 m) H6 S) {" s' P5 jbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was' Q: T7 @. J; {. }
the other possibility.9 a) d- l; [9 Z) K% x7 ?
{! X$ C4 q/ SAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
/ F0 B3 O: m) _& Q- q: Espelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
! I) s Q3 o% iplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".: O4 I a7 z$ b/ K
+ j7 n3 n8 `6 ~1 l2 U# y, vIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
7 x, N) V% n' B. B- S) R. hthe sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
! T g0 a1 p( Lkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
H, t! D5 D1 o1 xtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like8 } _4 O; T! V
fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
2 v/ o, s' q1 }$ f, {1 Oreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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! P4 b+ r% R5 \% HGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
; l, P( o# _7 X; F/ r: B) u5 p. Zben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
+ T+ y8 c: P! Y: f# T; ]% ~disgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
, u' V& h7 A" h$ H# | B! p"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
/ u [+ ^3 s4 v# t/ M p- R3 tafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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- {+ q/ W* {- Z5 MZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
( T. B) G+ k% ?! k o1 x; V7 Tunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
6 L5 `& d' r- y( Q/ Z- X- FUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze1 r. b* \, t: ^ x, a7 o2 b
forst plas.; M* B, ?4 K- F* A( X5 p& \
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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