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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
. {4 E2 B( x* K. e4 zbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
$ U$ i# \5 {" I* `the other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English2 b. J& @; L5 F% h. H6 c* W
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in5 q* t, i% f, [% x8 R
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
) W9 ]( E1 @. L: l: g" Ethe sivil servants jump with joy.
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9 G/ P/ S) {+ _3 h4 lThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up8 e8 D& @- ^0 X) r: @4 J2 T3 C' B
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.6 {2 k0 T9 U" L
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. W) e$ w+ n) i3 s+ \+ K7 `There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the$ D! c3 @" Z& S/ R- N! y
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like' |! d% X- S( Z* b* t+ z/ c
fotograf 20% shorter.0 \1 {5 R7 T6 e' x
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to! v7 B* H) }$ M/ H c/ R
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.+ q" P5 r3 W( ]1 r1 I% R
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always9 ]- I T& c% E
ben a deterent to akurate speling.$ v6 R" u1 J B# v1 t+ U$ h# m; t+ E; L% `
0 }8 s- }/ W7 w9 y. R8 MAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is! T- v" V) n+ T4 [
disgrasful and it should go away.
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7 |. T) n/ g* A; z/ o0 \By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
# N$ ^7 n9 p0 b0 b5 f/ W% K"z" and "w" with "v".
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0 d% l! f; R5 s( iDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and, d- o5 `) h/ j, [5 D. v
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu+ N( \+ f0 }+ u8 {; u
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.; ?: R- O; I& i7 V, b
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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, ?. ^4 R) C& a. Z/ H U0 @If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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