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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
% G4 z" |5 Q& X- W5 ]be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
1 V6 V% H c4 r4 G% P5 uthe other possibility.: W2 K* N3 b" Y- P/ U% G* a7 J
' e+ I- O) o/ {- PAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English- ? B0 w2 p7 g
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in" X# a$ u0 [) i& c
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".0 ]7 a6 \3 L% M( h
3 d+ ~- x' ^$ @0 q2 ?3 zIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make1 L1 d: {3 V. y
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up4 ?7 @/ Z$ B! a1 h- I5 { Y
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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2 @1 `1 r o! M2 N4 q: e+ h- E7 [There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the7 J* I# }0 T. n
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like0 q% ]7 W5 q8 M5 } T
fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to+ M! y8 H( Z! I& W
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.9 K, N% h0 O/ b: l
( f# [) S- Q( t) YGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
; D% W: n4 a+ ~9 ]" U: eben a deterent to akurate speling.
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9 ~; F( G. y9 x$ R! w eAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
$ S; A9 O& n9 y* T( B% t' V! z' zdisgrasful and it should go away./ z: [1 F2 }3 w8 C$ V3 e# U& o
1 Z4 ~* L1 v4 z( w$ U, x0 {" _By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with5 ?0 W, P+ E; n/ T' ?! B9 h' C; L
"z" and "w" with "v".
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7 U" n# C! r' L' k' rDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
5 B+ g' j% K& `5 s+ z8 x; b! Q! k/ pafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.5 S6 C; @: g: f7 G, l
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu/ L4 m5 Q: \ s- w$ }, N
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
8 S7 u f! @; I7 K0 _- o: DUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
) K# G) s& q2 Uforst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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