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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
. w( z: D8 W+ v3 i, Lbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was P3 n1 w+ `* J& _* ]
the other possibility.) T! S2 L/ }$ l) ^! Y+ X
, |" e; l! \- f& z' _As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
6 M0 J8 o( j" u! bspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in2 L' O& y% p8 a, T+ E
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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5 B6 m* Z( S- x! n( }: S# oIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make1 {; E( l! z: q( k6 c
the sivil servants jump with joy.6 d9 p9 g- p4 L( ?2 h0 s
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
4 u' K6 ~' W% G# j) X8 zkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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/ N- W( N0 p, U% B% w; [$ c# I: G( s7 j& F8 }2 L% z X" I
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the5 s+ F1 {! j" W/ P
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
! g! h6 x3 w# C! ^fotograf 20% shorter.' d5 V1 H& W; o; G0 {0 o6 [
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to" J' W6 z' f& T4 G
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always$ j' |8 K; `( L# b& X- i
ben a deterent to akurate speling.) ]3 E$ Q2 T2 @9 t( ^9 R
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is; ]% u5 J: |" C
disgrasful and it should go away.9 h3 A+ w- g" F
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
5 m4 D; H" u) n" \& y2 q |- `"z" and "w" with "v".
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. H; }: V8 { A# KDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
4 q& Z8 @- B( W8 ~/ Q- rafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.. [& c6 L0 X2 Q, ?8 j& b
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
& D; r% }! s6 u( b( h. dunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
/ q% |4 Q& s9 ?8 ]' L1 }Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
h' O# G/ ]/ x3 y& B5 [/ ]forst plas.6 I1 K; W# [4 x3 X
4 {" y7 t. h0 k2 L* v DIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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