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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will4 g# P# X2 h( [( O1 t8 M
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was1 y7 f1 h8 B3 X7 x
the other possibility.: i) s/ @6 h) T; j9 B
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English" Q t1 T. M5 v3 Z( C
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in V. r @1 n" M5 @( ^
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".. W# |2 I+ }% u$ g p* ^
' ^% u: a9 l7 hIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make0 n1 d$ H& A! M$ t( y* \
the sivil servants jump with joy.' Z- Q7 j7 d8 `: ^, \* T& W1 T( J
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
: Z7 F7 ~6 t1 d3 F1 |* n8 L* `+ Xkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.# W/ K6 U0 f w
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the8 K: l/ q) \0 Z
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
) f5 J) a2 h- b2 G S8 w2 c. [fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
) @' z* |3 E, Z: f/ R( J5 B4 ?reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.3 ^- Q! \6 o& N9 F+ |, Z" U' @
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always8 i; U% a0 k/ m ~$ D0 q3 _
ben a deterent to akurate speling." T9 o! g+ h% g6 n
$ ?0 b+ q% y1 s- @2 e- tAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is6 V# m" k( ]( x5 t! y. b
disgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with/ L$ \0 |# P* C7 Z7 d/ {8 [; z
"z" and "w" with "v".% g6 l' v& s0 Y! ?
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
1 Q( Q, s& M% E5 Y* Q9 Mafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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! \& i2 L6 A& o7 T8 QZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
* D1 ~, J5 ~( _% Sunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
\4 n4 A# [7 JUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
3 H3 p9 m& O4 {: Dforst plas.9 }+ r/ N$ _/ z$ }
1 O& X: b. l e" m! G! q7 SIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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