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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will7 V0 N6 [4 o% C, v8 o5 n- P
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was4 ?5 O; k% e3 u& |( P3 } g
the other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English3 M7 R5 P5 p4 S
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
' d; ^5 @1 T6 s: \4 C# X) wplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".2 n4 c9 [5 `, O
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
3 V4 W1 t% x3 U$ m" g8 N$ uthe sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up' A+ ]& x h# S* h6 ~" t
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.( d, T# D8 c- M1 I, t
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( |' j0 {% d) K1 jThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the6 V! q% v/ N& J9 a: ~
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
: X3 ?8 Q m6 e( b9 r$ c: Ffotograf 20% shorter.
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$ W. w3 g! m, d \; WIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to( A% @! t$ W& |0 ]
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.* f6 G& S. ?! g) w
3 a% C) j7 I/ {5 l+ N) PGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
/ `2 M' z" \! R' l) h1 F6 G0 eben a deterent to akurate speling.# B8 o& g# \9 P7 \6 a4 Y
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
6 D5 }0 j, s$ A5 i% L! O. v, o Zdisgrasful and it should go away.
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9 Y# Q) J* `8 GBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
, e, s+ d$ B0 T- b8 k"z" and "w" with "v".
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1 F2 V9 l# L; M% X v# P5 {# d5 I( aDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
/ J1 w i. c1 m9 s n+ rafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
& w4 H# s$ s4 ?6 r8 {+ u1 Aunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
6 ?- H# Z1 d: _Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze. H& m4 p- F/ l
forst plas.. }6 y6 q# f- W$ }7 r8 D
: z( ~" w' r, K1 a0 j7 wIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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