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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
k6 J, M' u7 b) x, b7 L) g: lbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was+ U$ G3 ^# M$ E4 j7 V% g9 h; n5 l+ r" _
the other possibility.) S6 P4 P, z2 o) C$ e1 V
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English+ w6 o/ x8 B4 @
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in7 y- C* J0 u; _1 Q3 ]1 [1 h' S
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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/ m y3 B1 W9 a6 |In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
9 C5 r- x8 Z% P$ v; _2 Athe sivil servants jump with joy.6 \4 k# H/ U( V' {, u/ t# f
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up# p1 y3 b L6 K C3 V0 Y
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.9 o: n# E9 [" i5 A2 C$ N. R- M
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the( O3 \, `1 J. C2 a% }
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
, C/ |) d i; H& C2 gfotograf 20% shorter.- e9 S& Q& ^, h5 a
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
1 r" @ W4 I3 C% F: Preach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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0 q5 J- d# U7 NGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always* `8 L; P: H l" ~
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
! X$ Z3 w5 P5 n$ g% S! J; f1 k& rdisgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with. F9 F: R) e. q
"z" and "w" with "v".
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* k; R3 ^( @# YDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
# P* e& M2 Q( [/ uafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.* {3 o* X& F3 V9 S" x
. a( ^9 v, m- V, p8 e7 zZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
* `8 O/ T$ c3 S2 r/ j& O, @* i2 Aunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.: y4 n% ~& L0 z2 p' ?5 ^" U
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
( c! S; I; s4 Z4 L: u9 m2 fforst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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