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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
# b! V" J; o; ^' v/ r6 t$ _8 V% C: Wbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was3 r: Q) Z! m2 I8 P
the other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
& \: p% O5 C' m5 Uspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in r" R, I$ `* g- v
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".) [ A9 |& S/ j7 U% ~ p' w; H- U
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
x0 s4 v: I8 p' X/ ]+ Lthe sivil servants jump with joy.
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4 V7 X0 t+ b* W( e M" sThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
8 r! Q- v( U+ M0 ckonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.5 N2 ~; I# n2 W$ [
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
9 ~7 c6 ?7 g6 j. z, I, Dtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like" K( R: O0 A- }4 q4 `, j$ H! R
fotograf 20% shorter.
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' M/ C7 z# {& y9 e" Y% r/ \7 VIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
. q: Z. v9 C( @! c; u; freach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
) x H% O5 Q4 L5 |3 E# G ]) Qben a deterent to akurate speling." V1 ~8 q, [: r
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is' `8 E& A# O: `
disgrasful and it should go away.
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1 v a. \7 M; p5 \4 ?( E& O) HBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with7 y, g- l3 ]) S$ Q
"z" and "w" with "v".2 c, ~# s1 p) N
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and4 h/ ^6 K4 k, j+ ]. i: i- q- K, l
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.; |$ R4 g, X" w# V
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
# L8 k! N6 ]2 Yunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.; x0 ^8 M) r% ]/ c
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze" g3 u6 p; t& p$ C$ z
forst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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