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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
/ [# J/ |' ^' n! @be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was, u, I! ~3 j$ w# g
the other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English+ X# ~3 `2 P2 x$ r/ p) C/ `
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in1 ]' ^1 N% H5 G! q
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make2 q/ z6 g! D3 Z3 @; ~
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
+ Y8 _/ ^; }- s* pkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.6 Y9 s9 K \ O$ K& z. J$ }
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0 _8 `0 i6 L+ V2 a8 e' TThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
. e' G$ L j ?4 r7 c8 {! }troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like/ C, T( g' v+ f" f: t* N
fotograf 20% shorter.( J% B" Q, I e, q
/ @8 g) V5 Z! }2 a i9 rIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to( d# }! W% z4 D, o! X8 {
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible., i% G$ n( _) c* e b6 Q' J
) M$ k; k" w' [2 MGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
& E( K9 M& a2 o) y- o# eben a deterent to akurate speling.( B1 ?* S+ `% `
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is% b" ^) C; }. h5 X0 D5 e
disgrasful and it should go away.- O$ K! }4 a: _3 J/ I& e
; ]: A1 W+ g1 ]& T# m0 y2 \- MBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
. H3 U- U) E4 @"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and: {# o$ d% [0 {
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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- q2 j) o. \6 j M) dZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
/ j% `4 d7 ]9 @: N nunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
/ I2 T6 {4 h9 o9 O, dUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze9 P( n' e( ^6 `
forst plas.
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' e7 J1 L4 Z6 _* {) F' UIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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