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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
7 r4 R* U6 P$ gbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
2 z7 k" Y' q7 F( J3 z }8 z* s. t2 ethe other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English) n% e& j) C7 s- Q- m/ n4 a0 L
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in- _. B- m; i+ _
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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: H F5 ^7 B. h# z$ m8 @7 |In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
/ U/ ^& J( ^+ h' w/ nthe sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up' Q0 P$ b+ P* e+ a5 K
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.( m! A* c- `8 G( o
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
& C- ]! A+ B. ~" c; E, }troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like- C+ V2 H4 I7 z8 L( |8 |. \5 c
fotograf 20% shorter.- U, V' {5 F. G
* W* u5 ~: J; Q5 V4 O% r$ g$ @In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to- y" L5 M" m! v' F9 v2 D. O
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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& D7 W( j ]) H; F G& CGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always( y' \7 I$ f4 [
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is, o% t* J- H2 Y% }6 z7 ~2 H4 _
disgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with! q* c& W% a2 E4 P- x0 P
"z" and "w" with "v".
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# _8 W# x3 B! l' V4 MDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and* k* S3 I# D# T3 [
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl., I+ O; \1 j/ I! o2 R5 b. {; R% u
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
9 _# F( X) W; _! h& ?: R8 dunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.. d" i1 `6 M7 Y" b
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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