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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will( l B: y+ H' B$ s) ?7 Q1 t* J' a
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English- g2 H2 C7 m( R# F+ i
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in. b- a% e& {% g4 o" d, Y1 j
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make6 l4 B# `, O y4 F! \
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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. U! R% |% A( g! F, @: xThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up! c! U0 N% g- C0 A. Q
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the+ {. r' r3 N4 U9 J, a
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
' \2 P/ M. F2 I5 bfotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
' t7 R# l9 z2 P& Z1 L+ _/ mreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.# y: Q! X7 k: F+ q
" Y7 ^( U" }4 i2 _- f6 @$ LGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
3 j5 B4 v% F( Z6 g$ w$ Bben a deterent to akurate speling.) u; B# j+ \2 e2 G$ }
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is3 Q, @0 {, L6 [7 w
disgrasful and it should go away.
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- ?4 f$ ?# |# B p+ T8 L0 ~By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with3 H: W& h$ Z* t$ S) Q
"z" and "w" with "v".0 i! X+ p% U+ _1 W* U1 i
" P( Y! U. Z: A9 I2 |9 uDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
& R* l5 [5 f3 R" u5 _0 eafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.9 ]% A8 D/ a7 O5 h9 l/ {. q
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu4 s; m6 Z# H# b. ^
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.$ \0 ?" V1 y5 ` Y
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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