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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will% i& O) W; l* \4 `
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was" d) y) }) A5 C
the other possibility.. Y3 c8 U' F b% @
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English# A. f* M c/ m% q5 }& ^0 f0 \
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in2 A. k$ g9 ]5 o/ f% ?0 p: O
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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% d# m% j7 V& b% V5 XIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
- {+ D- M' H( _8 Z1 @* @; Wthe sivil servants jump with joy.
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/ w$ _/ z- r! n8 P* H3 T4 L7 EThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up2 C+ }7 x- c& Z- O, _# d* T" Z
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the K! l Z7 j5 p' q3 N' E t
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
& j% z# h7 D' `! {5 [ h, @fotograf 20% shorter.
$ G# k! t' K/ a* ]# H1 z C& \5 T4 P* N* A5 L0 \0 Q6 S
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
, r% p# _1 ?% I; C# k& R- y( e( Rreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.$ Y( |: o& c; P6 F, R) \
0 C* W. g; E' P1 W; L8 c3 f1 |Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
, T) D b" ?0 j2 g5 m$ e& Uben a deterent to akurate speling.4 L" E# q$ y" w: A4 L
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is& x- @$ J: Y E* _% u" U; l& H" S
disgrasful and it should go away.5 y' @1 Z# I6 I5 R* G- L
1 B2 y4 u( f UBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with' M, e1 C- p# @, C* ^1 t' @1 g; G8 R. n
"z" and "w" with "v".
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1 u4 V2 @0 e2 i' [& x6 U, p* sDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
8 E$ l& H+ K8 o2 Jafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl., C+ z! E$ D" A/ ?
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu6 ^: c% V+ ?$ L3 V5 R4 A0 N5 ]
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
2 I& [7 h+ z ^% Z# UUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze4 a% P) \6 |# q+ `( M$ f
forst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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