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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will$ Z7 }1 Y. [3 T2 @* f0 E7 E2 b
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
" X( o. @2 J: Bthe other possibility.: V) w1 x; m) _9 \; [7 |( X! F
! @: p" u P. l7 k- ^; LAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
2 z" ]: ?1 U( ]) Ispelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
- Y( ?+ ]: u$ ?, _7 ]plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".. A& v1 d5 U% c
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make: m* j; O/ c8 Z/ V1 Y
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
7 A2 n; z# r+ }/ U3 ^' [konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.+ A- [+ r# G C
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the9 ]) T" z, ` Q( T' b. M( [
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like2 l, p0 n$ w0 B9 f+ ~ y& y
fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to' e% K2 v9 a; W) E
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.! Z' v; g% N4 J* y9 j6 J
/ |. L# \5 @- v9 G( f- vGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always0 W' H, R0 ~0 v, D
ben a deterent to akurate speling.2 A( ^; x1 K; o% @* @8 j' W9 m0 v, `
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is4 W; [8 w/ t; [% o/ U% Z( Y
disgrasful and it should go away.
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5 I3 @/ b9 c9 zBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with8 ^9 s* J# t8 [: A) d5 j
"z" and "w" with "v".- C# V" `' W1 B3 K5 Q/ E6 S
8 x5 Q, d' Z% s, vDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and" d' {# P. I* u2 w
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.: ?: u& [8 d5 r5 n9 Y" C, R. {# p, J
2 z: B+ E7 L! L$ O- iZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
7 i% s- ^/ p4 tunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.$ S6 ?7 P! J$ `3 T
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze4 v/ M% s9 X! Y
forst plas.2 Z! E4 L: p" q/ D6 {6 x Y
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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