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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will3 b* v/ v g$ j @- F n7 c
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was9 w- k5 @' B& u
the other possibility.+ Z5 R: w7 A/ O9 D" G
/ H7 A1 C! [& TAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
: ^ y B8 W- P( Zspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in/ z' u( f- Z- \9 x# N
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".4 [4 u! M: I% ?3 j# d
6 F7 |+ W* u4 F: Z, k2 ^In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make9 y$ r: j( V$ L" p4 ^
the sivil servants jump with joy.% x' L8 L9 l3 G' S
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up: A4 ?* x: {& c' p
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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6 D% r% j) ^) m4 V, GThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the7 @& f- Y; M5 x H K1 o5 r- A
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like2 l7 K) a+ c ~; ~' g3 z$ m8 M/ }5 y
fotograf 20% shorter.
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' a' P' ?( ]1 s; M* mIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
9 b: `5 ]8 i* ?; D* a) hreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always' ~6 x$ U8 y; V6 f% D
ben a deterent to akurate speling.; B' A z. [" X0 f' G
3 V- l( [# o) h& oAlso, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is* t# ?6 U, w1 s4 H4 N, T9 m
disgrasful and it should go away.: | ?3 i/ f: C# N) X- N& k
) W6 ^ i1 ]+ Z1 g: h2 TBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
- y+ ~1 R1 f+ t"z" and "w" with "v".; u* i: `8 N7 _' {" S- Y6 g
0 L8 N3 Y3 O5 C0 L: y, W. t1 TDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and2 d3 p/ _% d3 P8 K% `) c
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.+ B2 @2 T( x4 D- Q
' w) ^3 w4 w! p* N, gZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
2 _/ K; t" o0 T# w9 }2 k. z+ F* Funderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.! w \; D3 c- A: Z) z
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze3 J. i! J4 U) l9 h
forst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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发表于 2005-6-30 14:45
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发表于 2005-6-30 14:48
发表于 2005-7-1 15:56
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