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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will7 K% ?' h5 l% {3 r
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
- n* r8 F4 e- E5 K# d" T1 Qthe other possibility.* k" J; m& u& C8 U/ \% D
9 | s$ d) _8 c* b& FAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
% N, \! t1 L: L; \/ a/ hspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
8 C; f# a* r4 F3 M V# tplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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8 \" N- g, ]) h$ S) {. O8 m: [In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make" S3 Y1 C# [$ N6 @( }7 ]
the sivil servants jump with joy.! _' ^0 v9 q4 c4 z
( _" S9 _# r3 v$ HThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
' q" ~& R9 |) p4 t+ Okonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.9 D+ o0 Y# U3 t( y
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( Q2 Q: t# {+ X& eThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
9 Q4 M0 ?, ~/ I. j! }troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like- ^. N# C3 O6 ?5 B& y2 S5 k
fotograf 20% shorter.1 Y1 O) U7 N _ }9 e5 T
; r0 s, F; O# _In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to" }0 h7 D; p! Y$ M
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.# `1 z9 |4 F3 A% y% X& @
# R% ^. [8 |. j% Y+ }( AGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always6 a& ]" A2 v/ e
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
3 @2 f/ ~. c6 H: M9 fdisgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with7 O% ]# g1 [+ u( d" D x7 n
"z" and "w" with "v".
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" R* P$ s) Q/ i8 o4 }; ZDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
5 r4 B, x+ N6 @; r1 H6 zafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.4 U7 d/ r4 [/ U$ M- i1 d$ n
# W# y# v; @/ p* n/ D. V; h& r% hZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu* o$ n- H9 Q; ]5 w
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru./ b2 R3 s( t: v M
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze' I: H+ b+ q- l& K I
forst plas.' r, t4 ~; q' x5 D5 N b% t
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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