 鲜花( 0)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will9 u! f( c \ Y4 J
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was8 f8 }5 m' w' k
the other possibility.! y; q, w K# L" R. }
* o; R& G& j5 w! ~# D7 e
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
3 U" w! E4 C( o" b" y' R( }spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
# C' Z' F: b' Splan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".7 f6 ]+ c, y9 J9 `
* J+ h' a V* C. V) d" b& i& m" W2 @In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
8 _8 b6 p2 w, j. V' D8 U$ V" Hthe sivil servants jump with joy.1 t3 c- i3 W5 A* \8 ~( a
# N" Q- J+ e1 Q7 u% h2 d: q
The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up \% S) K% A% Q0 v& `
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
0 [* W H0 N! M! x
! O) g* f7 _& Q% m+ E, @" `
/ x2 t" y# z8 C. g7 nThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
: y6 B x0 c+ V; L& _& M5 |troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
+ X5 F6 m9 O: A% L- Efotograf 20% shorter.
, c) V: ~& D9 }* b
4 ?7 H4 Z3 K- B3 cIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
$ I5 `; @7 }+ p0 ^) F; Y4 n. Mreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
d* W. a) k9 [! V1 E$ t- M9 Q V) e& `
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
9 p2 a8 f9 R) h! Z0 e! b# ~. P! wben a deterent to akurate speling.
% l; f2 C) o7 q% t3 s2 E, G0 F8 w# k
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
, S, ^7 R6 B% L5 ]2 z8 g$ Hdisgrasful and it should go away.
" G+ F7 H$ Q# d
, X5 c3 C. Z- v0 C \% iBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with) Q( m0 R1 T( E7 ?
"z" and "w" with "v".
7 m; Y' K, c# y+ x' S6 y9 l. x& X& t) a* p! w( F. ]# a
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and' ?8 W: m7 l: q- j/ L5 J$ C
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.4 L& d; E. a% W2 y# r. k
* ]- q. h$ \2 u$ N) Y" m: r: RZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu/ k N& I2 ?" y3 Y( }
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.& u- D2 Y( e- |- ~7 S+ t
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze K( @+ |$ w. I0 n3 C# g0 s
forst plas.
/ ^% Z. x; h" w& t. f' _2 i& n5 |+ c; _" Z' M) z, X+ @4 j! [1 D
If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
|