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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will2 b5 b' P7 i+ f
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
2 |5 j% K6 y" w- p4 ]9 s9 b: lthe other possibility.
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' W" ^: n+ n& n$ u! }4 HAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English* H6 N& ~/ ]3 _) c. B! O
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
7 V; T" P, c# vplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".' u* P6 P% h9 [+ z r3 E% j. B
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
1 z1 a9 k; J1 n% c3 Tthe sivil servants jump with joy.. Z4 F; O, y6 G& ]; ]& }, q
( x9 U3 x1 O6 D( q2 X5 S$ AThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up* S4 M- n1 K; L' k6 _ A& O
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter." H, X" Z& Z j! K
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9 F) i3 H3 N9 u3 f; NThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
( T7 H$ w& H: w+ m# Wtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like+ S, ?$ a2 V; t8 Q$ z/ N) {) L! v- I
fotograf 20% shorter.6 c- c: Y5 ~! ^4 E0 q" m
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to2 F% t1 i# H0 F* W9 x6 V* E
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.' |/ l, N4 Z, e6 B& t
7 j, C$ c; q- l6 q8 o* lGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
O5 W' N) e! L4 B- Q2 T; fben a deterent to akurate speling.) M- h+ T" e, J Q
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is0 Q* o; y' b0 X" g0 O
disgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with0 M ~5 f1 e1 Y7 A; k
"z" and "w" with "v".( T. D. l, ?2 D% U
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
8 q, Y# g: ?9 P. Nafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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' I8 T' h6 ?( [1 C& SZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
6 ^; H, C) h% Z5 B% q9 N8 b+ Hunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru., A! L1 I4 x3 ~9 `; `3 G7 |$ F1 J! D$ H
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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