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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will/ b6 o6 r9 T j, K. `
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
; l- U9 M& l. } f) Nthe other possibility.5 F0 C9 @* Y/ B; z) ], X
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
1 x8 Q$ i Y+ d* k' s1 Xspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in; ]. T9 {9 R/ f
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".- \" C5 K; A( C2 R3 }" [
/ e* o- s% O4 w2 AIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make9 a; j+ y4 A: M6 p) L
the sivil servants jump with joy.1 u* J2 u X& ^+ b
2 @% V, T: m9 A5 z) ^, WThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
; h6 W4 R1 O& y5 w% R! b5 Nkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.* S1 G" z6 y0 {1 c1 I
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
8 R8 x5 O* d5 e2 ^' ^troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
8 }$ f$ b; J7 o, O3 I5 l1 x; pfotograf 20% shorter.( j- \8 X+ H3 z' K0 [ n8 m& ^
( u% b/ G* v4 o( _! GIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
" ^" x& v7 J) H) Y+ preach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.9 P2 i! U6 _' O! d
5 A# f2 Q( j* H" L. ` t+ hGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
: Q0 r' ~1 g) X$ G7 E; {' }! nben a deterent to akurate speling.' D4 p3 M0 Q- M% I5 D
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is& u+ p% ~, g3 I/ T6 `
disgrasful and it should go away.
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& `+ }# v$ o& ?9 M' ~ t$ ]By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
2 {; I# B9 M' C$ n. p"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
. {- j. F& G' i" s2 j# ~3 safter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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& U, ~2 {+ S" k, ^: r( H7 X8 LZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
: A0 t, i" p/ h$ _. F2 eunderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
5 x _0 b" M1 XUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze- U' O j9 W# s q% Q
forst plas.
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1 l9 y/ s# a& a% H' a( eIf zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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