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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will5 [9 I% @ f2 D; ^
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was) ]8 z" r% _1 V. ?; U4 a0 g
the other possibility." l2 L7 [4 u* X) g9 P! a+ u
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
2 s3 [0 j+ d0 @; [& E) m% L0 aspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
; s" `# N- M/ M7 A, C5 Lplan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
4 \4 ~9 E! c% Nthe sivil servants jump with joy.
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. q2 \+ p# ]8 V9 {! Q5 _The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
0 X2 b- [0 o3 W3 Pkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.' y3 b% \% M! J/ o
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, ^ m' M' m- ^8 T; x* o* uThere will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
9 O$ f& L2 r0 s5 y1 m+ z( dtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like! I w; h0 `" H4 Y- _
fotograf 20% shorter.- _; P0 o& o* I; w
$ ]" ]# @+ e! A7 a: P, y Y# tIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
" }* N8 _& \+ z! N0 e6 oreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.& ?/ n/ t7 g( i; o, m
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
$ j4 q$ @; |* O5 aben a deterent to akurate speling.- v. q( }7 s/ i/ ?) D L+ F
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is- b2 S/ O% A+ l. K
disgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with# T& m. R; m- V. u, N1 N* c! k
"z" and "w" with "v".
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6 d* l- t2 X# c% k6 d8 P' B9 dDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and- l @+ o0 H. k9 l5 l9 U
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.0 c3 a) k4 H; Q$ k j' \, p
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
3 M3 Z( S4 X+ B+ y( h) Z* ounderstand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
( m/ L4 e) A2 U! v3 n+ y: F: `4 VUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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