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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
6 m0 H) O5 [, `# R4 J- Xbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was0 u8 i) f, Z1 |; `. O: t
the other possibility.
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$ _( P4 i+ R2 \As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English! S1 V2 q9 E5 n6 S; ~2 A
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in* t) [5 }9 O% G8 ?2 H6 \* ~) g
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".' x! e4 y) s' j5 i
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
d7 D8 ?- h! C2 s6 `2 Jthe sivil servants jump with joy.0 Z9 Z, S1 G' g" v
+ E: a, Z( F9 U9 jThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up6 O% E b3 `' b( c
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.( P. |( g2 \, j1 w
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
" U- M: X& J: O5 e4 p1 e* |% W, utroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
8 l' W4 H% f% u2 ^fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to8 e- s$ K% W1 n4 `, K
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always: ^" c+ {$ {2 W, x" J1 F* C1 s. S
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is. D5 W6 f5 V( I
disgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with& b/ O( {! B7 n0 M! B3 S1 n
"z" and "w" with "v".$ b2 G) ^' ~3 g F, {$ H- z. n
( o4 X' c2 r7 w9 V5 RDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and `$ J- m1 _ S
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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) f2 S4 c" o2 j E# d" JZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu! u% E3 H. C) i* l0 f7 r: `
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
7 U/ _( S- v% ?. r* h4 IUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze. j0 w. e N6 l. \" u) I- M* t
forst plas.
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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