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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
w1 Q5 h5 ~9 h( mbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was. z3 U2 e2 j6 Y5 F
the other possibility.
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7 U8 |$ T: X5 k% }As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English, i. d+ P$ l# {. f1 K! N5 S
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in9 X' {6 z4 D# b/ T, `# x! ]
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".
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/ ~; X: f* O& ^5 q' bIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make4 h& O) B% u& Y
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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d+ o4 ^' F. I" X3 W& cThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
; l% j5 v% o7 ?! H& akonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.1 c3 _. N5 M! C( M, G' N$ c8 l
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
. f9 J' {* p7 }5 A7 m2 J2 x& K/ wtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
" _$ q4 E9 w5 V. {. j, }: Y9 b1 n! S4 Ufotograf 20% shorter.6 I$ O% F& K% O) {2 O! a- K7 k
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
5 c* ~2 D- z3 M8 J a* W4 `reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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, n7 l! T7 r# Z5 p% HGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
8 S7 d% a" C- X% T) @ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is& h2 P9 w1 z' ^
disgrasful and it should go away.
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; Y% U: G7 _4 d9 C& ~1 hBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
* o. x$ E1 ]/ z"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
9 K0 S, j8 H" ]- L9 @! y' Aafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.: {/ T2 A7 |; S
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Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu F# ~. l5 O. S& r6 e* ]% H
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.* z: k8 c9 J4 p7 u# e w$ M
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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