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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
' V- ]5 ^2 P6 x% Wbe the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was4 l$ G+ X9 t: A! |# Y; z
the other possibility.
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* Y2 ^" N1 @6 O5 R+ u: c3 w: kAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English @& u% g, c& Q1 l
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in9 O+ h6 n: U9 }7 I- H4 w7 K
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".6 E+ C0 E2 i& k1 m4 a
" l& L& W3 r+ Q$ cIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
1 P1 b( D6 _7 Q- u* \) Dthe sivil servants jump with joy.' x, ^2 W, Y7 `3 g4 |
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
, ?& Z8 y0 S: U C+ V6 [konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
3 x) m& V n- F) ztroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
) a$ E& n- s/ y# b$ |4 tfotograf 20% shorter.* f- d5 S# L. K
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to/ d, C# Q+ G0 w
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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7 r; b. |5 N5 h9 z' Y6 eGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always, a' h% x6 U5 K" j7 G
ben a deterent to akurate speling.0 S v1 U! r+ x$ K3 w
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
; v5 I/ Y4 O' ^. fdisgrasful and it should go away." K0 [! k$ f- j, r/ A1 @& I
, S8 h# a6 J' Y4 v1 v5 OBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with$ ]' F4 C* s; A# U5 c
"z" and "w" with "v".' ?" \3 @9 D8 }. L( Q9 D: ^* Z
! g `8 x0 u/ Z) L/ t) E0 bDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and) Q+ v! |# e2 ^( ]' M. F4 I/ C, B
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.9 @2 c3 X0 o3 B7 D- Y! Y5 W
5 b4 T3 D% B; s3 N: G- k5 WZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu! b" S/ Y' ? [
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.2 ?1 g; b+ F1 u
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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