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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
' w s5 P4 }: ]be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was; C h% }; ^1 k7 p/ f" l1 ?, X
the other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English* s' V2 r% P+ E5 Z! ?/ v
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
3 M4 N! q$ C1 |& A9 a7 s- ^plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".# V4 e+ V% `' {& K; y
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
: Z" O# C m2 p/ J. `the sivil servants jump with joy.0 k7 ]$ P3 G. }6 E
" X+ y6 F6 t, W/ Q0 @, MThe hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
* m; c1 g ?, } P1 e3 w, rkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
- h4 L. b! c: `' i! Htroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
" `# }4 p& Z3 m0 bfotograf 20% shorter.( ^5 v# s5 o- Q3 o0 c
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
0 K9 [3 f4 w+ s4 G2 Z9 p6 Rreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.& ^/ w& A% X8 f- W
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
5 ^ a0 H4 W5 ^3 v6 v) ?+ F) ^ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
& ?: P: g7 j( Hdisgrasful and it should go away.! E5 C: b1 r; I I
( h) e/ Z$ z& d `- ~/ mBy the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
; }! D* N2 v/ r9 q"z" and "w" with "v"./ g- T i w' i' j$ Z
" f" [- y- @# L; p; v2 TDuring ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and7 Z- [# s7 \8 m! U
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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% k# N+ U% Q: Z( M4 n# RZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu0 m2 Y n! G1 S. _: x) K& Q' f
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
) T. i* J4 g; N3 TUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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