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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will) C8 s8 |- a) c, u! s% ?* ?. `
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
* s: |% ^; O4 M) F& [, Othe other possibility.
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As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
: w3 `! _" k1 rspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in/ b" A( M/ \4 ?1 V* f3 d- B
plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".3 ]2 l' ]) G8 ^ [
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In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make2 c8 b' B: e8 n/ d7 ?' D
the sivil servants jump with joy.
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
* g8 V9 q/ e2 W0 ?# gkonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.+ Z8 I8 K$ R4 y7 _# |
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
0 ^% C" ~) Q0 P! l& s1 h* q: k' xtroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
- s% [* T4 d7 s3 K S% Pfotograf 20% shorter.
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' H6 n5 w1 t/ A s( A& y' Z# O/ I" QIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to+ O5 Z. O4 S' z w/ Z
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always+ l! u# Y7 _% Y5 h/ O9 A3 {- k) T, \+ ^
ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is( z, T. P+ H, [ g% u x
disgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with" Y# |- e9 E/ j- V3 H9 x" g+ v
"z" and "w" with "v".% |& s$ Y+ M- ] X9 L
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and
+ ^+ Q8 T8 ]9 a0 [( M6 u mafter ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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& d" l$ v0 e: ]% Y+ ?; }. AZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu( E% ?5 a/ W3 W5 @2 K
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
3 l3 T) y: m2 h7 T( XUnd efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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