 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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) x& v S9 ^0 Z' U( `5 N( ?4 CI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.& t- }0 P2 |7 s0 n
* b' ?5 T o# m: |% B8 K9 \* QI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?3 O% L1 q, P; E& l8 a8 l1 F+ b% }- c
/ h+ S- s. p9 A' s5 E- m1 JAnd the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?") O5 F5 c9 q0 R8 x$ m
) ^+ N" j- q2 z2 v6 u: [I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed? ^ K* p" Q1 a8 D$ S* _* N
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?4 U! h% O2 q4 ~) ^
2 p* }. B0 M4 @* P; [I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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9 h( s7 ~+ C* L8 ~5 e) F5 jI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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* n9 w K5 ?$ ?" C$ S W5 uSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"' g& F+ f) ]& ^2 P6 l/ Y
0 e" v5 o# b+ Y; j1 O% t, Z1 t3 L- dNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.% e8 l$ p9 C5 L8 A S9 T/ Z
; y. S/ d. I: Q" c) ~/ Z6 s! @Thank you very much!. s: x2 |( C+ V1 n$ H+ Q9 \
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4 u1 M5 D! E5 }% jImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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& ^3 f! o0 l1 N2 U7 g8 j9 d( Z1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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4 z" ^9 G, q7 \" M/ f& U2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.0 b" a" Y& r' k( F9 y" Q
* o" ?2 d( F, F3 ?+ O) J; N"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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! d C) x J7 iJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.. ?7 F3 j- A! T7 a! h$ G
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
