 鲜花( 3)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma
' f: y3 S+ c( J* F9 }$ _- @7 eDad, Daddy, Dada, Papa, Pa
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+ b Z/ B! ]- AJOB DESCRIPTION:
9 [' I% s0 I- V) c& I( ALong term, team players needed for challenging," |( X) c0 K8 `3 M# U3 w, t# g$ ~' p
& \! X4 [& L. s4 [" k5 g9 Q5 Spermanent work in an often chaotic environment.
- N2 c& X5 @6 L; l! OCandidates must possess excellent communication 0 E+ @; T5 G. D* o# I, ^
and organizational skills and be willing to work 4 K. R( i9 _% P: A1 C9 c0 I" t- j. }
variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends
& s) Q( U1 K1 R. `and frequent 24 hour shifts on call.
2 b9 l! L( m7 bSome overnight travel required, including trips to 2 M7 V& M& M `4 F
primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and : P8 P0 @2 |& P8 H
endless sports tournaments in far away cities! " c, y, O5 C# E& M! E( Q
Travel expenses not reimbursed. $ O, }4 @$ S% z6 a! X3 f6 _
Extensive courier duties also required. $ T9 \# O- N0 L
* G% Q" \. T: Q5 ~+ [+ U" ^RESPONSIBILITIES:+ _4 o% H; Z' [: F$ P- w: w; `+ ]
The rest of your life.
7 W! W2 }0 F7 m% C: nMust be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, 1 v3 y+ ^' R* | ]$ Y/ M
until someone needs $5.
1 J/ ]& U( a) vMust be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. 1 F1 P' t4 g5 ?7 ^
Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule
' T5 ?, {' G! j1 n: ?7 Vand be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat
5 ~! F N* Z9 h" f1 l4 sin case, this time, the screams from # m; k5 m. M H& [+ P1 k- t
the backyard are not someone just crying wolf.
- ?' V+ o7 }$ P- K4 A$ h/ W+ [: \% M0 uMust be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, ; q0 a5 g7 T2 x
such as small gadget repair, mysterious ugly sluggish toilets
/ l8 a9 W9 ?7 o' `and stuck zippers.
( V1 ^) a2 s. @- w$ c* ZMust screen phone calls, maintain calendars and
- u# d. q6 d0 Z3 R" wcoordinate production of multiple homework projects.
! D, Q% o) S. T& ^Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks.
6 y' g; ^, K2 {* N7 w* g4 [, ^Must be a willing to be indispensable one minute, h7 D1 @+ X5 b- W! \( D9 w
an embarrassment the next. : v0 q$ ?( [# g9 a6 d n1 E7 R
Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a
6 q7 a) q7 f( S+ thalf million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices.
8 d: E) b* K+ XMust always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.
5 X I5 V2 g! O+ v6 ~4 IMust assume final, complete accountability for
: {$ l2 b3 k/ K+ ~. W5 E O. x" D9 fthe quality of the end product. + }! o6 m- @2 s6 D
Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and + ?' p" _% a1 s3 L- p
janitorial work throughout the facility. * s/ m2 T k9 R, s0 p) P
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POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION:7 N) Z2 M: }( r3 a& E. p
None.
# ~( ~: r0 e7 d7 U3 F% g: XYour job is to remain in the same position for years,
$ u" x! q: ?. m; I/ pwithout complaining,constantly retraining and 5 b+ f, z/ W8 {0 m2 m) |
updating your skills, so that those in your charge
: Z( s2 `" K) L7 ~can ultimately surpass you.
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PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE: 7 _% g4 l. m2 Z" A- y6 V! @
None required, unfortunately.
) j% e- F. A9 i+ p/ M0 COn-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis. 0 O* a8 O- |0 L( P- y3 v5 X
( a& q$ N, }2 D8 n! G7 ~- }( bWAGES AND COMPENSATION:
0 W) G2 K5 H ^5 eGet this! You pay them! & y+ ^ j. K- b
Offering frequent raises and bonuses.
7 E4 o! ]; |; e! A1 M- Za balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because , Y; S3 e4 w. G
of the assumption that college will help them 7 B1 [7 k3 a# d b7 R4 G8 Y
become financially independent. . b0 T- P* Z4 a8 _7 h" Y
When you die, you give them whatever is left. ! H$ W; o1 S+ ~% E& m: Q
The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that / }3 V0 W: Z# l7 l, Q; U3 N$ p& D
you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.
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4 Y& f: h: X, ]- c6 R8 b4 D8 KBENEFITS:
$ P3 p \! V, sWhile no health or dental insu! rance, no pension,
9 T6 L: p- F# | Vno tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and
! ^8 U! `1 o( J2 X2 Wno stock options are offered,: l f, A' i) K! ~+ F) j6 M0 ^% @2 \- R; V
this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth,
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, V1 M) ]; e3 {* punconditional love, and free hugs and kisses
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& R) C3 i( |% j. {/ P3 }for life if you play your cards right.
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& N1 g2 u# K& z" {. P+ @** AND A FOOTNOTE: THERE IS NO RETIREMENT -- EVER!!! **7 H6 i8 m3 S( a
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Forward this on to all the PARENTS you know, in appreciation for everything they do on a daily basis,
$ ?6 l& x3 P& Y7 W! F" jletting them know they are appreciated
0 S3 _3 }0 X# n2 @for the fabulous job they do...
0 i! h5 J: P* \% Kor forward with love
( u, l' i% U3 j) ?7 V# mto anyone thinking of applying for the job.
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-4-24 11:47
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显身卡
发表于 2009-4-25 07:19
