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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
& m. |# A8 F- q$ ~2 Nlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb! I5 c7 ^8 S3 [2 O) i0 S
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
5 |- f4 b% q' w  \+ Ethe newfie would like to play a fun game. 5 U# Y& w  R) i. E# h' C; l
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so" M4 i- \" ~7 x
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
' T# K$ d( d1 p% E$ s# P lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
) y8 _. E: l7 [4 `/ _ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
  ~. s: b# t* ^8 [( Zyou pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
8 Q4 B% E% m( d, z- M/ \$ ^  a will pay you $500.
+ g/ r8 s% W5 }
) w9 D* K! o9 @! F This catches the newfie's attention and to keep0 d: s/ ?. R5 U5 P0 p
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
) A3 z% [2 v- x2 y+ o
, E. f; H8 i0 q/ K" V  b2 l; {0 WThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's" U8 j# B# J3 s0 [
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' : Z$ ]% U0 r+ K+ F, S& \+ \7 A

; H( ~- ?6 p: r5 a* S6 UThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his4 K& E# N% n5 @: l
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the) C" {" L  g2 E9 O) I
lawyer.
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
% ?# u$ P4 ^5 G/ u+ z' Fthree legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all$ l5 e( e8 i, {% N+ V
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all4 w# {& i4 o1 p
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
. S' J' [3 ?  ?7 Mof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and9 Y3 I: Z5 S, n% l5 e( a/ F
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right) x$ H% u- t7 N5 ~. k: z( j* j
back to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He% ^1 ^. Z6 s( ]
wakes the newfie up and asks, . Q1 G5 _7 Q7 b+ L, Q9 Z8 d

+ f4 m4 a+ l! P# [6 _'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
% |) e* B: K. [' wcomes down with four?' % n% B8 V9 y+ [0 V+ O0 p1 ?

& n7 r' M' T2 h) z6 bThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $58 c+ H/ m$ i, }
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!: ?$ Z% n9 c+ n2 }1 j# a/ F

; f& ~' u' O% |9 a: |% D7 lLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the2 V1 Q+ G: g9 X9 C) z% G" o) m/ g
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two : D; H2 A' u4 U8 n! L
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 4 ]4 \+ X% I# v! D& f
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
3 m% t* K0 S: f5 W; x& W3 M/ [>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ) e4 K# t+ ^$ {) u, h9 t% s  s
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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6 M; O1 n) [7 C% W8 g>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
  a5 q$ F. C8 q- z>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a . w+ ~0 Z2 o7 s; J6 ]( n
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more : T& B' c5 |) l6 L; Y
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, ' X, Z2 D& H. @
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three  [: D6 f& U5 r* ^. ]8 [3 F* _

& \) _2 T8 b$ j>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
& k) m3 ?6 D% y>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
. C4 S0 k% b4 G+ }- \; ^0 j9 I>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand ) j# Y4 n/ K# W: i1 B1 a% |$ m
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
. t+ ?3 f+ m+ fA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
% |5 b; ^( }$ r/ M" E: I' dlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
3 I0 j3 r; W: athat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if# g& n) j9 s, T
the newfie would l ...

, I) q' e4 \; H3 d4 U/ j+ T
; h$ y6 H% W! I& X0 z; C
  x# z; L$ b! ?7 s4 o好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:; ?* I: O& W' B2 Y/ G
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,9 Z: f$ G# y3 [( F' f9 q5 b
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 . [0 F. M6 j6 Y( m/ q4 Q, _
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

& F5 P7 B3 g: _/ b9 T8 K4 W真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 + {5 E3 J3 p$ \

/ V2 Y3 W1 m7 e, i1 b" }- f7 v7 {9 e, T' e
0 K0 v4 Y0 I# |5 @
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:3 d( h6 V: X7 \* c
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,* G' ~: r* M. ~6 l+ E6 O
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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真聪明,偶像啊
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
4 J3 f5 l8 ]+ _
/ ]: f/ v* M2 h真聪明,偶像啊

2 _* b+ P: s/ P. t! K8 `0 J! H8 A% l/ }- r$ a# ?9 K* C9 k1 T' @
全盘接受一下。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
, e2 U4 }& F, b2 j* G, ^4 z* ?: z9 j
$ z5 \( L5 c: ?% e1 v* D4 I5 }8 }  y5 S+ G; v
全盘接受一下。

. }0 g2 n* R6 a2 R- q真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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$ l7 u4 R' {8 [4 ^5 `

! ?' q6 O0 {+ \& L1 b# d别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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) o* m7 @) V: {& A! L$ \! D) G6 s, W8 A' y& t9 }3 s# F; `
别把我往坏路上领啊。

$ Y3 m* M& |+ p& {2 o你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 / u/ ^! K& ]/ S. D  U% t6 A
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 " N6 j& j! H/ a/ N" h3 O' e0 I5 t$ C, X

! L3 p' B; }' q真博学,偶像啊。

/ c; ^2 h+ L2 n+ Z$ g" k1 I0 A大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

' ?5 t( N/ t; M# Q" V# z9 m! c她是大学教瘦?
1 c$ d& K+ q6 K3 a1 I" U大学教胖还差不多 ( T5 d3 ~; b! I* I) e: J# z8 Y: a
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表   c% V! x) W$ ]* G# }4 f! T
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
# q: k; f- K! Q9 M% g8 R' H# P紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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