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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a+ G( U8 s) @  T
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb9 s1 ?( z& N6 z) R! T
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if$ P* L6 K+ I& Q: B, C6 h7 p
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
, ^. \3 {1 ^) B0 [/ R  
6 F* K0 E1 D6 v$ r The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so% Y. v" f+ Z9 M. X+ z
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The( i, D2 U+ L/ V6 S1 W+ U
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
& I9 t# K# W3 R; Z8 C7 zask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,7 ]' ?9 z3 A" [/ u! B& f) H9 V
you pay me only $5.
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6 e$ c/ e. c7 ?5 }$ M. o1 L You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I6 {( r8 K8 k3 m- q1 W$ h7 E
will pay you $500. 2 g, b+ d0 Y1 ^3 d" A/ n$ U, k

2 `, H0 c4 w5 K8 ]" N" E  L This catches the newfie's attention and to keep: f9 s+ K# u# B; ?
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ( n5 V. l- p( c' }# k% c$ m
% ~# b- S- w; T$ @& c. I
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's' D; b4 E  }* ^3 s
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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& r" z& S$ V/ s; a0 wThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
) A! Q) x  Y0 Q) hpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
# \  L2 i7 F2 a- T$ x# B: h0 e( n  plawyer. / d, B& n+ q5 f
" Z2 d5 o: a& _# O3 @
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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/ }( [2 [' z/ u3 m9 h! [* S9 qHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with7 _: x) q( ?$ i# E( B1 S
three legs, and comes down with four?' ; a: N  B9 Q5 U+ y
+ Z/ @# \6 Y9 z, G$ t* _3 q
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
5 }$ x" s5 w; l8 r( Greferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
6 H3 g& I- k7 j# V$ P: U- y1 m3 Cthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
- m4 i) D2 Z1 C( f/ b" rof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
) D3 H  z5 K# r# a2 o1 A0 ihands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right8 t) F( g, {" a) P/ y4 w
back to sleep.   t  `$ n& d6 i$ ~9 p: ~
+ u, a( W2 L; W0 ^* ^' [$ {8 S
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He; Z: I/ D' g/ m$ o9 x! g
wakes the newfie up and asks,
2 k. Y# G% p/ n8 L
+ G/ [7 a9 V  G- H' G'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and$ f0 T( e) K1 u/ I$ X- W
comes down with four?' ( l$ w$ c' f1 |% n: i1 C

# U  n$ s; ?% MThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
3 l. Z" \8 @* x* Tand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the/ Z4 r5 m  L6 P

  G. w1 n! e" E0 b1 t>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two * O" K. g: \' _2 `1 l
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
  w+ a8 i+ g% [5 |( M>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the ' e8 Q0 k2 s- y
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 9 D" x* f/ K! X
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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' {" Q7 Z, s6 j" M2 p>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
1 ~: O3 d2 x- U7 Q, X>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a / V. O- W, F$ M& I& g
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
$ k: m  L/ T5 w1 x>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
- f+ I1 @$ ~, U& ?& `>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three9 b- j6 d! b& o/ m( \5 x
+ g. a, a, k* R6 G5 n; c; t0 x
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
) l9 i4 _+ G( |, q2 T, T6 z. O4 _" n>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
: q' a5 x7 \$ u- }: |- e>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand ; u' \- Z9 H# T! ?8 g4 A
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 9 L) _3 z% n* k5 j2 d& D/ }
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a4 }% W2 W! }  q4 v5 E" O4 J0 ~7 u
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
1 h, {# e$ Q* S: W/ l5 Y( lthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if' X, P7 d1 ]/ m. v2 ?' B3 S) R  N
the newfie would l ...

4 G( {' W9 S  k, i. L8 ]* n+ ^( F' ?: Y: i; [$ W9 K" F

; j3 D  F5 j5 M0 h$ D) N: Y好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
" K, R5 c/ ~; A2 w/ p) @0 |; ]“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,% L4 u1 C" j" O/ ]; k6 Z4 C
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
- E% S! N% s8 T8 c7 b: X5 ~加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

" e3 ^) @% ~* y& y2 J/ n9 U真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 " R8 f( R9 ?& o5 M3 A$ L
  B1 F* P/ n: j* N& E4 m
3 }6 K' {, ]6 ~4 @# I

3 N# K- B2 r1 D2 G. N& ]好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
& _) \/ K, f( }3 B8 M“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
0 n' p2 S, ^2 A% V好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

6 Y2 x5 v  |6 Y真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 . o% a" U8 M% i! j1 O

/ v, W$ I9 M" j3 u真聪明,偶像啊
. d6 x1 y9 |, s( z7 u

2 E9 ~3 y2 Y; `! q4 I2 R全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 / ~6 C% l2 t& M8 V

) I# b6 ]4 z* I2 J9 r# }6 N; p, \5 @
全盘接受一下。

4 G$ U1 F; U" [. {  @+ n5 @+ o' R真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 4 W' M; [3 @7 z) O
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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* l+ y( k4 P( U

. m* S. g! R1 j; p. j% T别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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' Y# \8 A4 h0 U/ V$ N. P; `. H) y
别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ) ^/ D% b" c  `; Z- C2 s. n
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ) B  W2 a2 B& }" z2 F
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真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 + F6 V& U( _7 r& L; I* x
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?  M; c- {9 a, k% R: J5 i2 O9 f0 f
大学教胖还差不多
9 n" K$ Z( C4 [她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
9 ^1 o" X9 \5 L: f9 e- S紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

9 G! T2 X0 h0 W5 X' L* @  K说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 * T8 g  p) E8 F; w
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

7 J! Y6 g. }/ n0 {( d1 ~! a4 d9 T# |* s4 Q3 l0 B$ _
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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