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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a5 X( ]; j/ y7 R+ Z
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
- H6 n- ^5 S& {that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
+ T& b, Q4 t, tthe newfie would like to play a fun game. " M+ d5 w3 l: V4 I+ I, \+ _8 I3 @
  3 B+ K" f! f% Y% Q
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so: x+ P! e7 A  W2 s
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The* D/ t' L9 e9 }% [. Y2 z# Q; f
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
1 A# S$ @0 n8 x  o( V4 m/ Eask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
, U8 A: Z  k7 D$ t7 w, u% O( Ayou pay me only $5. % ^) i4 v) \5 }  P1 p1 Q
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I7 _$ _" C- Z3 O) f; ]
will pay you $500.
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* V' E0 m! C6 ^5 \8 X7 f/ C This catches the newfie's attention and to keep. m/ w7 @+ X6 ?
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
+ M. e% L" Z7 n+ C1 ~! T% X5 o6 e* U! q. ~( b  ?
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
0 i: w4 p$ [& f' zthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 5 o" F3 s; D0 h5 T
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his3 x3 v6 N: x# U) l4 z( f3 w1 z2 u7 @  P
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the/ J+ x; A  l: g. p/ [6 N* d" J6 \& Z* V
lawyer. : d( G6 f9 R* W' d: K! ?1 C3 B9 B
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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- m! W- t2 v- D& f6 |3 ?He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
& V+ n4 J$ [4 K; G/ M- qthree legs, and comes down with four?' ; E3 I/ e3 c* p$ R( k( K' D
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all% z9 d3 e# V9 y; k9 n* X
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
, w% r! N: C  }: K: gthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour4 [; ^/ ?. y( p2 t
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and$ s* {' q9 C5 M; t
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
! f% r! G) Y. O$ U/ ]; Kback to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
% d2 G: ]% B6 @5 v, y0 p6 Ewakes the newfie up and asks,
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'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
" @( W/ w3 q; R- T$ I9 }comes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5- N0 {1 y; A4 Y/ A6 O% b* o
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!7 t/ \* k9 b  a5 Y* o$ c3 o
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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9 O3 ?* o6 r5 S5 X3 A>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
. c2 S- ^5 K+ ~>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
3 w  Y) V' `- n5 _* Q>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the 4 y" J9 p" s) G6 Z5 w
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
7 L( O6 {5 e' ]' D! o! f* K>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
. v1 v+ `) [. @+ v8 _% C+ n9 d! J4 a  a
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
6 G9 i. W* g  C- {- I>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 1 ^- u! Q  p1 j3 h+ x6 W
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more ' K7 r, V  o7 O2 D- r7 u6 K: d2 W
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, ; f- q0 U- f* F- O0 I
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
$ |. q7 u7 t8 v: X0 G+ J& ~
2 T1 b( z" d: J>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's & w/ O6 Z  M0 B! K, e& r
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
) s# ^& t) V5 Z) f>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand ' S+ N7 N) V- H% a% h6 _
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 & p/ D; R# W3 a1 x1 i7 V8 Z; g; i; N
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a8 }, u6 S/ j: O2 ?+ ~
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
, q8 K: W$ |* Q" }that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if3 f& t/ w* C) V2 z( z! U
the newfie would l ...
  ^6 {6 F% k0 ~/ V

4 d+ O* l% E+ J0 g/ f9 X  V2 L+ @* r& |- e# Z. N
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
6 Q( s% Q! A# Z1 s, {3 ]; d“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,2 Z& V) K5 a6 `
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 7 O; c1 e$ p' f* L% Z4 H
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
& b8 n* Y. U- {$ k) |0 C) {
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 ; S0 h( \' g1 O% C( ~
( U# t& E! S; R9 h  R7 ^
& _3 _( Q5 E9 X& D2 M

. ^. H9 ~4 N( V2 Q, H4 e好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
# w4 d: v7 z' g& A9 `/ g“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
% Q( l; F; ]9 M0 _& Q好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
  t# A  _% f9 s( _! v
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 / i* M1 b  z8 p: U9 X0 ]8 w' e9 U0 Y2 U

" w& N1 ?+ a) s7 J2 ~( D# u8 Z真聪明,偶像啊

5 J( k. e  ]. v( `9 i  H
2 @  e, B6 I" v1 X1 e% v全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ; Z. a) Y1 @1 ~  B8 b) B
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2 k2 I1 J+ R! V5 d" X% `% ]
全盘接受一下。
4 k* j. h+ H/ ^& R
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 3 X4 F! d3 i( E( D
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
8 _9 m! m6 ]5 ?' M+ I; }" Z
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ' T, u" y, g7 E5 }( Q0 Z( y9 J4 n

2 s7 y( o) Y2 e1 t2 D% t+ j5 X% ~9 }! t+ ]

+ I' w8 _' l/ Y7 j- t0 O3 O别把我往坏路上领啊。

0 Y  W% k* R* {% Z* z6 s你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 + T  n6 }, e( x2 r
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ! O' [: ^2 x) n) c  y
- ~) u8 \3 e& Z9 A1 z# h2 o2 V: ~$ k
真博学,偶像啊。

1 m% E  L2 ?, D3 h大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 7 n# Q, J5 t, q1 `! Q' A2 Q

# h8 [( d- P. t( {* N5 p大学教授哦,能不剥削?

' L; q( r" L8 M! Q( L她是大学教瘦?
3 M, w5 D8 w$ ?' `& v大学教胖还差不多
2 H# X6 J9 [9 J7 d8 \# M她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
. k: w* E2 v  u6 H3 y: H9 U, V6 |紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

2 A" S  _5 Y3 J1 u# J说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
; Y9 F. ?" b3 {  o4 A4 U8 k紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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8 [: O* C4 u* u% \哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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