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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a4 Y3 ~4 o; d4 z; N# P
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
' v) v1 E; \% q' U- B% N1 Hthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
& I+ E! k7 m- g$ U8 v5 }/ Hthe newfie would like to play a fun game. " q1 ~7 a. I: E) _
  " v( i: A0 i. P5 O
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so& \/ k2 ]/ S' a+ a
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
7 F: G: J+ l- b lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I* G9 _5 b  y2 u1 v9 d2 v; j
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
7 Z1 ?$ b& {. k! L3 X) _$ Lyou pay me only $5.
( k% v& S1 g! o; _  `- M9 T2 g6 Y 8 z0 I8 s* A* X* J5 z4 @9 d
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I/ i" o5 F+ u9 ?" n- \" @1 x$ L
will pay you $500.
4 a3 t$ c: D3 X* F ; A; c- P0 w7 B7 w# M6 @, l, X( R
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
  V, \; c6 ], H2 {  Gthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
# G4 r# @3 Z* [9 ^. B1 ?7 }& {4 s& F# J; v/ S  n0 B5 m1 E
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's  D4 }& C9 Q5 s0 x: H
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ) a" Q4 l/ h2 G; }0 Q7 _! w+ }

, g1 a+ w" ?; j% YThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his" ]! ^; {/ p9 _4 p( H
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
* z  d$ y1 ]5 z$ Z0 p- P# B/ zlawyer.
% y! Q4 N& S  \# L' K; f$ p( d+ D' d# [; o' W
Now, it's the newfie's turn.. h7 g% H/ j& R: m' B' h' [' ]

6 L0 i, D0 g, \- Q0 L! _He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
0 m7 z! [$ z! t% b  Q2 Athree legs, and comes down with four?'
" s( X5 s( I6 x+ c! ?8 `3 Z. O; h4 R) [- N! a- ^4 G- v- x) o
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
/ y( _( g+ l0 d9 X3 b' ]/ qreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all2 S" l- v$ K$ ~6 l% C; E& S
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
. W9 u& e, ^) x- m5 ^of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
# @  n* v9 k% K7 Shands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right& V  v7 f7 ^  c$ U; w
back to sleep.
0 ?* U' t9 ~9 v5 f
; ~+ j+ j9 j) U8 B3 ^0 eThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
1 V7 Z. `+ \+ S* F" O: _wakes the newfie up and asks,
" F. @7 k! N# i6 A& {5 n
5 H' l$ {0 U) _$ `$ w. k" K'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and, }0 B2 w- N8 d1 ^1 H
comes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
9 |% ^6 A3 G. ~8 r' hand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!- F2 A% p, E. p

2 S8 a* f, ^* |; A& J% wLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
2 m0 a- C4 }1 T/ `: F9 J/ v: n& c  A, D! p, O3 `; m- w
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
& Q* d% }2 M* _6 i$ R% `7 J6 _9 ~& {>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason , h8 g# {* s9 J6 g+ e  \  H
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
5 n% i+ f: e) D- [- e2 w! z9 b>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, % j5 }; p4 y# Z9 c6 M
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
9 \; p& {) s- `; q5 _# V7 D5 \! B) K3 t6 g% K- T1 h# q
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
9 ~* r1 t# Y! R5 J9 ?5 \; ?8 u>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a   b- V8 S$ H: G% P
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more % l$ D7 N7 z6 [1 u2 Y& D6 P  Q' |
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
, ^/ Z- ~  W& e) s4 [/ U1 a) a: P8 `>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three6 ?5 E# d) P8 g, s+ i/ T
7 [& ^7 {+ ^. _& A
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
" g0 w5 H$ F( F  J>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the # A8 r, @/ ~) D0 F: v
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
! B1 j; K! ^7 a# f>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 0 A! x8 @  |& V7 n: e
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
; D% w- t; S) S1 U0 H2 k6 B7 Z% Clong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
" k* u+ w9 V* J: A5 Y$ E1 v8 Sthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
( M5 l8 u- T0 z  u( q3 zthe newfie would l ...

$ H9 w4 W/ p2 @  u& C# m% }; l/ v& E2 W8 J1 V
5 [/ I6 P4 t+ v6 x1 e
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:& {$ f+ b8 p9 i1 a4 Z
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
$ z7 c- B% L4 r: J4 m* b% ?好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 7 Y4 Z5 `/ }3 I  ?. S& [6 o# T6 E
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

+ c2 I# ~' n+ F7 j: B6 g2 a真博学,偶像啊。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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6 E* g  X# {$ Q3 }. t: K4 r4 H: A$ {1 T" w5 h

1 o  v; T: |$ T+ B2 c7 Y+ b好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
1 Z4 r( l6 i# r“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
( B8 H0 y$ h' s0 }8 l# ?好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

, M: P" e: A6 z3 b. t真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 8 q4 b( D! V" l  K# V. G, [* f8 \
6 F$ g2 `1 n7 W: |, F' h: B( |& X* Q
真聪明,偶像啊
  ~5 w; C; o6 x6 F' A( B7 `& O' i! k

0 Z2 Y- w- ?2 K9 x) e! a! B% o9 P全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 7 \7 ]. a' i+ V5 T% f# M
8 q, L6 U6 R( g7 ^
- l" d; T( `% j2 Y$ s
全盘接受一下。

0 z: ]2 x( ]: G9 O" h) T- p- U真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 / K6 c0 I$ }5 M7 `

. c5 [; l0 i( v9 ^真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

1 J5 P, m! g8 ~+ U1 T5 `8 D9 e/ k/ J: v, t: T4 M

+ D0 Y5 R5 R8 X6 R别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 * I8 x* i6 \0 ]6 @. m- q- ^

0 ]* z9 b/ z0 D/ H1 O7 C+ k3 o0 t& S
5 }! O6 F# C4 u% n! I  z9 {
别把我往坏路上领啊。
4 g! y8 @, `* Z/ V: V% u2 U
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
/ k: b4 M5 Z; _3 n; I加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

! N1 {' S( G- o多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
: C7 U& s8 k+ ?
+ F/ m9 P# Z! j# s真博学,偶像啊。
% f5 }. A4 o& |$ e4 Z/ P/ @
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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0 e6 G6 T, f- F大学教授哦,能不剥削?

" c+ o9 g5 l! X0 _! u4 C3 E她是大学教瘦?7 I6 B) r' L8 ~. ~& _7 V+ G0 ~4 c% ]
大学教胖还差不多
. Y# I1 q* \9 h她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 % e* y, V& _% z. t* w3 ^- Q/ L
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

/ v1 c! [. E  d3 `6 o说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 # c4 ^1 r8 {- U* L
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
; b) z8 u% f4 K( |- l4 p9 Y' U

' w2 F( _# ]4 Q' w& |哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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