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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
! `6 g: f+ p* s/ H" Jlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
2 J( F* @3 \' O, y0 j# W: `. Z8 _" }) Athat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
) G  L% F$ \, Y7 R0 jthe newfie would like to play a fun game. 6 _) [$ ], }+ N" w2 G0 j3 o% e, A
  . |5 X0 R+ ]0 S, ^
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so0 A: G/ r( o# V" z
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The& W+ R1 R/ s6 Z- C! R5 }4 H% z
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I+ ]  s% n. J( b2 @; }6 e
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,2 e" U4 ~8 z1 d: ]
you pay me only $5.
! X$ n7 r: k& X6 j/ W ( j7 j% c' W0 Y$ ?8 G5 V
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
; j) d8 `/ A& I7 {# j0 b will pay you $500.
2 a! K* p/ B; O( O8 |! i
. g1 C& d0 P% P5 r8 z9 K# @ This catches the newfie's attention and to keep4 }  e: p& \: r. }
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
  v, J9 _1 m2 b: i! w$ m, o- m. K) y* D4 @9 [+ e, V
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
7 H8 u+ e1 p( othe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 9 o, a, i7 w3 c: k" L
( Y, j' `( e9 y; i
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his  l9 [  q% }+ |  ?3 o7 i4 r3 k6 A
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
7 g4 ~; j. E( ]4 V0 R" L4 hlawyer.
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Now, it's the newfie's turn." ^+ q0 U! U, |9 u' Y( V, _7 Q( t8 k
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
0 z. D7 }4 a" [) hthree legs, and comes down with four?' * Z- c& W' a+ [3 }" r, K5 h
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
  H/ K% d9 A3 P8 Z- `7 c! Ureferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all8 n7 ^- o2 x, U$ q- O5 n5 _1 f
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour. T( q/ L$ T6 E4 U
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
, m  q5 s: @2 D0 H- y% Whands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
+ c7 a9 m$ Q+ R2 J' n! Jback to sleep. # ^3 d8 E$ ~6 ], Z7 U: S2 O

, k8 ^- t1 P* b- `5 `) c* PThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He% J/ ~; a, V8 I+ y/ h, Q
wakes the newfie up and asks,
9 y( o4 ~6 q& [5 P: W. O0 o
6 [9 E( K' B, Q& |1 ]$ q: z0 ?'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and+ G/ k5 m( u# y0 d- b) L
comes down with four?' " M; o# H3 g9 q) ]2 |+ j) ~9 }
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $55 H0 f6 K& a" B9 |5 m! F
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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4 _  W6 R' r. X4 o% iLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the# r4 T; B( |/ @$ O7 c! K+ H  ]
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two - _  J. y3 R3 p& X+ O1 ~% A
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason % p* v# \. \5 z" M
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the $ L) ^8 E: L8 Z/ e# w. U1 R& Z( g7 Y
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
6 i0 w. S, _* ^# E9 H+ O  ^+ r>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct8 i" I* e5 q/ Z0 {- e; P9 a* p6 {
' _0 [: N) |  b5 m" ?& w; f5 Z. S
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
" R) c- G8 C( D% N) w>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 8 d8 R. a3 |! |/ u1 ?# }/ h7 ?( e% u
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
9 B3 t% P* \/ n$ _6 Z4 y4 V>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
: f# P  V0 V' z0 z( q>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three1 {  M, V0 s2 U; w1 V& ^; M

. N5 @  |2 m. m; D; r% V3 `! |>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 3 k+ C, k* K; @
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the ' `; ?) {6 U4 E
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
( N' @6 I4 n) r4 ]>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 7 A2 H  {2 X* d+ p' t
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
: s8 E2 J2 U$ G% M* rlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
% D  D: Z* x) O9 W8 bthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
2 l8 s) E) r  x3 a. Kthe newfie would l ...
$ u( p# q$ a9 L" R$ ?6 [
/ C( M( [) l8 y! a) B- B2 W

8 G  h% \& v7 `$ d5 M% H6 Q好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:2 o% p% Y' ^5 c- O9 k
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,) q3 `1 J1 ^& V
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
: x* C! ]! |# y8 m+ k& N3 J* j加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

/ n# n& A# h( F  o1 w, D, p1 j真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 * H0 f. ?" y# ^; }

- ^9 D6 C# [% Z$ G2 |2 V- U
7 s. ]& p( S  A% S* X9 b
/ P5 [" i3 s* M( I好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
* q5 m6 N5 t6 `8 p+ ^“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
2 u/ Z+ Z# x, b7 C% A6 \好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

5 Q$ N* v0 i/ w1 R8 U真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 8 d( l6 ?/ _4 H1 g' P& {! N8 E

0 N2 M1 y! I% W$ U真聪明,偶像啊
9 [* i  }7 u0 p: g. {
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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表   f9 [3 B. Q) _. h/ J5 k4 `1 t8 m
4 R( i; E. r- L" o: ^! J
3 Z4 h" V2 k6 O" x6 h6 c
全盘接受一下。

! E( T8 x% Y  s, {, J真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
1 v4 X  ^' a3 H# j5 Q: p/ q
. S5 l* ^9 j7 h. w  k% d- G% G真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

& b6 G6 e5 E  v# |' C  R$ s, L

* p$ k$ x" k4 K4 S; h别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 9 i* ?, N: h1 y; {# J
: w5 j9 u& F: r: t3 X) q7 A

* ?4 O( x/ j0 x7 ^; H, [. \/ R# H& {' K
0 t3 m, P' z" A+ f4 K别把我往坏路上领啊。

1 Q3 z2 ?. Z$ M2 D9 P2 `" U你已经在路上了
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 . {# G  N3 s0 ]( V
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

) A$ ?/ W/ b" C$ w7 Z, E1 j. w  U多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 # b* _) s% `% b% c6 x2 [0 P/ a
5 M( i) E! I9 f' x& v
真博学,偶像啊。

" W, |2 M2 a" W大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

0 M$ h" l4 D) I( W* A+ G她是大学教瘦?
  D. F( C5 T+ \* \0 n大学教胖还差不多 ! E" C, Z5 X) }. K% A! O+ P2 J
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 6 @. u" d4 D* I" F, X/ T
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

0 j4 V% b3 J0 M" \9 i说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 3 x4 W6 p( @! P  E
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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