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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
( P/ q* W6 T# |/ z; N) e. T5 Y4 Dlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
- P3 W( E) E8 m3 R/ S2 @; m4 }that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
) R6 D- n' `0 L4 }# J8 vthe newfie would like to play a fun game. ) y. N& ^" _- y) X
  
, j' A& X. X6 D5 w. w/ k$ F The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
) V3 T" @) P: |* t, g, a he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The  h6 g2 t3 b8 R; k+ w4 P4 V
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
8 w8 W( C& g+ M4 Jask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,5 Q4 X1 D; M# W! M: a
you pay me only $5.
2 b, Y) l! n9 `( n5 Y' J5 D
! Q5 _) H$ b8 x# V, N You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
$ U5 c0 i8 u' |5 D( ~ will pay you $500.
, C4 w  J/ y6 ^( p, E
6 I) R& U! d8 _2 T5 d  j5 O/ D" h, h This catches the newfie's attention and to keep0 `7 x8 r7 }' P
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
5 ?; x; x% J9 W* I2 Z8 [2 m, y
/ H4 ]. y" Z) f8 v1 H+ H' YThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
. y+ Y  c  j2 q5 F' k& _the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
# v6 ?$ i. l% p* o& H( a2 }0 |pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
% G& R+ h3 D( w1 n* [* Qlawyer. 5 m! n; C+ P" q; W( u$ u
2 C% @$ K' P, L8 u
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
3 k9 o9 `) r) S, j9 J8 b
2 P& |1 v0 `3 K6 Z( n$ UHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
: {& u) T1 h1 L, Qthree legs, and comes down with four?' / Y4 g- y& O% t( H( l

3 X; ~& L/ T! u) n( Q2 D% c9 AThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
- Y' i7 o2 T( i, X: X. Vreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all2 |& q8 Q  ~, Z2 S8 n! ?- P
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour3 O6 e$ E8 S# I
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
# P; ~( e8 h. U1 \% bhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right  @( ^( F( T& z- R
back to sleep.
) k1 l: @# h% _: b9 v7 M
+ J2 e  ^* E3 j; [" _2 hThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He$ H  \0 u/ E$ s# m0 S% m2 a
wakes the newfie up and asks,
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'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
2 A3 B4 X; w5 e2 Q' o* Icomes down with four?' ( f/ y+ m0 Z' E) i/ p
+ a- r: z- V: T: _
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
% l, t  C2 o9 ]2 W+ Iand goes back to sleep.) C$ n" P1 x. N7 l

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!* |; l8 [" U* w- x8 R  d

* G+ v) w4 Y+ v) I9 zLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
# e2 k, k% g. {& l
0 q4 c3 l+ K, e5 M; l>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two - ^" X8 |0 ]. r. {# }
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason * U8 v3 F% J. B$ M
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the / T+ W+ B4 s- X6 l  J  X8 w
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, # U( _( O) w% }: [
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
+ T5 t, B2 \7 n' b' I* O8 E
: k; l# @7 \  J0 H6 @>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research % B8 V' e7 C/ l% Y' i. V4 w! t  M
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a ' z5 o) E9 B- y. o: p* f4 E7 \
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
8 T0 P& A0 J: ]>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
5 L0 @1 c+ M- K! K/ E+ s>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
2 c: x1 n" {& u9 o2 B7 z; b' b6 Q
* Y3 f$ y# v( N* P2 G>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
# R* {$ y" I. a" I& ^' I>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
5 C9 p7 n6 h/ x) C0 D5 [- a>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
' m: t1 U" h8 ]& W- Y9 p( V/ c6 x6 Z>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
) o3 |5 G( y6 X! @! R( ?) v' J! X1 TA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
4 N- |: l1 W1 _% M& a% ulong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
+ s8 u2 u% ]! O% I& T+ G3 athat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if7 n7 v  c5 p* U! M4 K5 G
the newfie would l ...

$ ~( m. r/ n- [
  {# a0 A5 q# @, Y! s& _( f/ I& X7 T
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:. S, o  I, M! e/ C8 R7 w1 n! g: Z
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
' Q, Y1 r; w- I+ u% I; [% i好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表   s/ Z; F6 t) O) n) l' B
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

/ B! }0 U5 z/ F) \真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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: s; E, W9 s  y  i

2 j" v0 C, [2 `, ]好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
( c2 }: z  G! _; v+ n2 |“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,7 m# @8 |; p4 c$ d
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

) Z$ K! O/ |+ h- F真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 + K; [4 l, f+ ~
, S( N, s, N) R7 O
真聪明,偶像啊

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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
+ J8 S! X& o" X2 a+ C( j7 Q
; c2 f/ k/ g# Z. O$ B0 J+ U- T: P, y  t6 f; w& u+ K% o
全盘接受一下。

% O, G( ^( s- t& _2 G3 u真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 % z/ A5 w2 i0 w6 \/ Q% A* b. F7 T
1 ^5 ]* Q( f$ z7 o
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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- o" }1 X" ^4 j& y& e+ S2 C2 z) t9 x1 }7 U$ Q; R) I6 ]$ }
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 5 z( Z8 b9 k/ B4 O/ }& A- k

" |  n  g2 J; d1 z7 S% e* X6 D% J5 E

4 Z6 c) x7 d, s. z  j* w- o别把我往坏路上领啊。
# s5 q" @9 J" E8 _
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
- Q* i& r9 p* m1 x* }$ T加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

# Z1 u2 S: U' e1 E多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
* n5 u$ \; a, P+ t* C6 S0 d  d* ]9 Q  t" P& [* b! q2 ?1 J2 y/ p
真博学,偶像啊。

6 q! P9 x  C/ ?1 G' @) {大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ' d( P6 }, x5 F) G
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?
) Y* K* g% J+ `2 `9 Q+ d# m6 p大学教胖还差不多
7 r, b" h" K3 c0 R( }2 M- q* i她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 : }( R6 E2 h3 {! Q
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

" N7 I$ n! H5 o5 T8 x说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 3 K* k9 @! j2 S& t" B+ X7 |9 J
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
. X- K/ D4 [, M. p$ A5 \5 z* Q

) t9 r4 k! j0 p  C哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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