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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a3 J, \/ r5 [% X; E, f
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb0 t/ E' G5 |" j1 W* y
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
  O& z) N7 N6 Z% dthe newfie would like to play a fun game. 6 U4 B& m% ~: j! ^  k
  2 N& j8 B  O. I  u9 s7 _3 H
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
1 [3 I+ a& V- Q& Z! X: ~! T5 Q he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The# P- T& c/ V3 N& O  Q+ R
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
9 c$ P$ S3 c5 }% H; @" D2 Nask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
; x  ~: O% P6 w7 Y: v/ Wyou pay me only $5.
( B0 @7 Y/ o, G5 W: Z. ~3 J. s
. R5 {7 y4 H' T$ x: P8 ^; j  ` You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
- @8 W4 x/ M1 s9 o" F will pay you $500. 9 [0 ^. V2 Q: C' R3 m9 d
$ Q) Q8 A! l' t# O" n. {: Z% a0 Q
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
6 w6 X* l. V$ e: c- g+ ?6 Uthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
* U, _! P- a; v* [, B' ]* K0 o9 Q, ]0 E6 q
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
2 _# i4 v* r- l0 r  z8 gthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
+ O) M) }: g* x- v4 L; I! ~1 n: q* Z/ r2 ?! m6 V
The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his! i* b# [: e, F7 T1 t) d
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the; J- N) U4 Y2 ]0 O+ T! {
lawyer.
6 ?( \' c; r  F/ j
4 o5 _. ]. g0 T: M- @( UNow, it's the newfie's turn.
# q5 I' Y, t2 R% p
- z: E* q  n6 d( H# ^2 f  F- MHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
2 {2 Y* d3 X. `+ U" Pthree legs, and comes down with four?'
6 s2 T* R8 G6 Z5 d* G% m
! {+ l2 D3 ]" U+ L6 w' t, }: MThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all( [& B# @0 D( m4 R( m7 E
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all, G) d0 ~. p& x# v1 {
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
1 N# g6 ^: O7 h0 B$ Tof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and7 U7 e( J; ~. `! l' S; F
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
! F" f6 K& O' J  y5 }back to sleep.
% q3 o" s0 K" ^; g+ t9 x7 q* K# Q# m% X% U
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
9 e6 M5 V6 K! n/ d' Z4 G7 U# Xwakes the newfie up and asks, $ O( ?7 S* F  r$ X

  G1 f  q6 ]( j& b* i2 k" J0 w3 r'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
3 O+ ^. P9 S8 A; M2 f% lcomes down with four?'   H; n) @# f7 H! [: t( ^/ e, E
9 t' E( V0 c$ {2 l0 W; V( r
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
$ E) t8 O; U# P! B/ b/ S4 O1 Dand goes back to sleep.2 Y2 J2 @' d6 }, d7 t" g: V
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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: P' \! l0 w0 bLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the% X8 j' D( t: z/ _" L- O
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two / e/ h& [) L* S0 e/ N' k
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 7 O, U$ c, l) v  ^4 k4 j. O2 j
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the # Z- u3 b+ o8 N! ^
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, ' ?2 ?" n" k. D5 P2 k  P
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct2 F( [4 `& x( @
) Q6 @4 f9 o' N; }, J$ g. \8 V
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
8 A/ ~  n- x$ {>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 7 G4 H1 u3 _) m+ ?5 U0 k
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more # x; G0 H( `$ P7 ?, v0 F7 G
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
  M0 a* w# o1 ?: |7 m2 Z>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
9 T) p( [6 {6 {4 [3 @+ ^7 n: k  e7 T: g& q, {# K+ k: R
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
9 ]9 D3 _5 X; i5 ~2 C- [>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
- p# a. Z" y% [; c. K>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand ( T) W# e) V0 S2 S
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
+ Q1 `4 j' [9 c1 iA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a0 Q; R$ j8 c5 D" A# S
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb% N$ b" q3 m1 a  v
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
% A5 D* u) k7 H8 Xthe newfie would l ...
1 U+ q) g5 n+ B- k% t
7 A; _; M# q7 C; W
/ N* w; d( ]$ E$ L
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
  K) m1 \. K$ i  g6 c, p0 Y“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
, `$ e" Z1 y" {好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
- ]5 C% H' Y6 B加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

$ u. s' \( C# ?5 R真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表   j4 }% @) t# A0 v5 K

$ U6 {  w/ C$ J4 Q9 n4 N' r3 D/ W, j! x& e; ~" J3 w5 l

8 O# b3 a- L" `7 f6 I好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
: q+ B7 A$ q' i3 |2 Z“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
- I: U, D/ }) o" h3 Z好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
/ ?+ T& L  @  z9 Z+ m- e/ ]
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
! g: D4 v( Y( w  y( o8 `+ t2 l/ g2 J. ]/ ?$ G0 D6 @
真聪明,偶像啊

% K& |' |. Y: t5 g" B# p$ H" w' \8 I0 S" s2 x* F4 R5 o8 V) Q7 J
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ! s0 q/ s  v3 I9 d: O7 q5 s
2 [) ]' [% O4 I1 S; a0 K- {& S
) J& [4 Y! a1 p' z
全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 % V0 j8 a  b1 s

) ~# `) x2 c' x, r2 L. O7 e真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

7 w5 d0 z$ ^6 n) G$ g" c
2 y8 [4 [# T, P# {: V- \
, ?9 k' W( y1 `别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
% R' ]7 d* Y+ K; @  p- K4 h
/ |2 l# U7 a, b  p9 \8 h# y: N) n9 v; k& |1 K! y

; Q9 d; P7 O* J4 E# n, @* z别把我往坏路上领啊。

+ W, E; I) C: }! s/ [% I  X你已经在路上了
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
3 N% F1 y8 d/ z, o) ~/ N加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

. c) |/ h! @3 d: d( X多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 # l8 d2 f  k7 D6 f2 i8 s, y8 X
2 e8 Q1 Z3 F& q- W% U
真博学,偶像啊。
3 e- s2 s  E3 f0 h: J2 K* [
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 - [5 _3 K2 P+ |) x' K
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

' M. H# _. u7 y: ~她是大学教瘦?$ T8 J1 j- S! V* Z5 p; \
大学教胖还差不多
* r- V9 r9 f+ e5 v) q) O她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 7 X( g: B5 r3 R3 y4 ?2 G- m2 ^
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

: _( {9 Q6 U5 }  N说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
大型搬家
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 . H( J) t6 A) X/ l/ S% T
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

8 s0 W1 o- h6 G; D- q  f( c1 P* ]2 ~  Z5 |/ d
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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