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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
5 T+ A, G; t: u' K% b5 C" E6 Glong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
  Y  T2 Y( {9 v! |! t5 dthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
& q/ s8 B7 y' ~5 f! Vthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
0 ?. G: G# a+ g# k' z$ `  
* N, J& x6 H- B, ?7 w3 S The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
: N  J* {  A% a1 { he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The- [  L& y% \8 W9 ]
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I; U5 _0 F; ?, R6 j# V( ~2 N
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
" X0 ~& L0 X1 xyou pay me only $5.
) S% Z5 @5 o6 V1 \
: E) Z% z; K/ z6 N9 j1 x You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I! A+ H  w1 @7 U% Z9 Z( K
will pay you $500.
" D/ ?' I1 ~: |- }9 \
8 _. a! K( [9 a  w This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
3 ^9 T# H7 N% @9 J, n0 |2 [the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
7 [1 x, X; z6 U5 }0 D: A( n
0 M2 y+ `- I+ e3 l# K/ F0 {) GThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
1 Y8 |" Y" Z, `4 e- |( k& G: `, nthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his8 P1 I5 S6 `+ s1 z2 u: A2 f
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
5 ?5 K; v4 ?% r$ ?. W: {lawyer.
7 X  o5 a2 ^  @( L9 ~: @3 ~- @% Y* e, q6 p9 _
Now, it's the newfie's turn.6 u4 R& u1 d7 M  c8 v* w

, A* M& W* E' y/ u3 zHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with/ [1 Z  z7 ^9 O" t4 J2 m
three legs, and comes down with four?'
' D. ?) ^: z4 ~/ _5 {7 E1 X9 t
& y, Q: b# N( `* U7 `7 _4 q; s) MThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
) u+ Y3 t1 t- T# j5 d( ?8 B4 O9 ~references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all, L" X* E/ E# Q
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour+ x3 K$ U' Q! m+ F
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and( P) C& z7 w! h, d: Q* t/ n% u
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
2 l: N6 z# ~+ G7 \back to sleep. ) u6 A3 U. F' f7 o3 x7 L

2 B% r0 M0 v. xThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
# A$ [2 `* v. H3 z# s3 t* @wakes the newfie up and asks, / C% P, b3 ^! y, I" d2 F
5 k, Y- q7 C" [! M) y# a" d
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
, K4 B5 a. ]$ z! hcomes down with four?'
, C' w1 B- ~, P4 o6 c; b4 c( v# C# K% }4 h2 g% \& |) O5 t
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5# ~$ e) c' y9 ]  e" ~. L7 {- U8 y! N; \
and goes back to sleep.' ^  ?( s. \% p

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!  v. F! P7 p' T2 h* l9 C

1 L; U: e- g3 W* jLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the* H' \) g" ?8 Z( }( d9 o

/ k( {3 @; C' b" }>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two % u  T: e4 J( M7 x2 k4 H2 n
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
! g; F2 a$ _( @3 x>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
8 e+ w7 K0 P9 Y( V6 w9 X" ^>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, * t0 I0 V! f5 v, F
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
3 f/ G; s4 B+ E! {+ e" h8 O% Y% Z7 ~8 T' T4 U% _/ ?
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research * A; P- g. P8 M# e- U% a
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a ' z: ]2 V3 K9 y- G2 H
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
- S7 Y8 u2 \4 m# i5 B1 V>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
$ T/ d( `8 T# w, ^6 }3 E>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
9 c2 Y/ T$ S3 T' N$ E/ C: e0 O0 h7 E2 V3 q: p0 q5 T
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ! |" z- @4 Q' {- [& F$ d+ A
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the & y' u, o5 h, O$ H, U2 Q
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
  q8 R/ Z" [2 C; a1 {' u>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
+ i: ^+ M; W: J" lA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a: S, o% |( ^$ x% r
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb7 {- H$ v% C0 Q; n$ h; u- U" g
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if" C  C" U; o' B" I  G9 [
the newfie would l ...
: i- E9 s/ p& f+ x8 p

; e2 K8 S+ v" ]
4 j; d; t8 \9 C- a; r7 w: ?2 _0 u# ~好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:' G; u2 c# Z/ K& z6 r. j
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
9 M: y9 i5 t, x; `好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 + d5 k* D. Y2 o& Y3 d" i
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

7 H% k. ^0 d: m* x6 v) Y2 O真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 5 b" {  g2 U4 O/ \

2 }" z' i4 D& }4 I' l! H& ~9 C: g  r/ \4 g
: s1 M- `1 x" o" k- v- P
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
! k9 I; u. s5 ^“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,  g: z- I  _4 f7 ]1 d) O$ |8 I
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

, h8 `: n0 u+ o7 k0 d3 h真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 - _9 O2 d( M( _8 T' c0 U/ z6 \0 s

% B. {  U6 k" G; ^% A0 [; \* I真聪明,偶像啊
  m0 [& F! y0 V+ d5 r4 q
* n& v. `: W5 X( ]( P, X( V6 F! Q. ^
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
5 P1 C, m3 T0 V( L
# S8 R/ M- l8 M
4 r& F% Z- W" C3 y' b全盘接受一下。

8 U" i& b$ D7 B0 O+ C2 n$ I; F; t真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
3 {- Z* I! T% o, n4 m  L
- U* t. B* E3 M真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
; k; ^  G- z$ L; \1 C
* h& @; ~  X# U- B# b5 q2 i8 G

3 f, |  ]1 W$ J0 Z! l别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
( [; |! y! _# c' E; _; C
; H' f+ d+ v6 K9 K0 X; I- v
) b  e/ c& |% u1 z% \
3 b4 |* h3 R2 M2 S5 G& z+ {- Q5 k别把我往坏路上领啊。
5 [$ o* }; e8 Q: L( K
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
# B4 j. k$ w2 g; O5 c加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
8 f. P2 n  f" X& e: ?. D! E5 {. v
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
% f* E& {# Y  K9 A# Y  v+ m# X$ n% k: T, t7 m% ~4 D" w
真博学,偶像啊。
) }% X9 H7 o  q2 V- w; [( K3 b
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ( ~' `& l5 n! s; O( d; ~5 {) w
# s- B3 h6 @& T% [9 W/ l
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

8 k& L1 n. }7 W, V7 \她是大学教瘦?
4 o9 b! g6 b. g大学教胖还差不多
4 l6 n+ N8 t. A$ ^  c: I6 i她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ( v7 ~$ ^7 F. r8 y
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

+ s/ M0 t- J- E( w5 T' B说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
/ g1 d  r+ c+ `2 t* _2 A紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
# T9 V5 X6 w! n4 e! a
( ]1 \7 H( W3 A/ H2 V
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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