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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
  N# @  I( R# `  Blong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb3 f- h3 X. w0 C% k( J
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if8 o" M% N3 q: ?( _8 s3 M& R
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
4 ]" Z) T' g) [/ E3 I  
* C$ u0 ^; R( P8 @+ B& ` The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so5 o# n- o/ S1 H' z( V
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The+ U% s& a( m# H# }6 U0 _) t$ I
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I6 N+ A6 u% t5 z& X; _
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,; _8 m7 M. I6 H/ @/ ]
you pay me only $5. - f' v9 a( a: i/ Y, s
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
( N) Q; C( j6 {' B* Z will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep6 ~( [! X7 {3 W  }; u- o
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. ' a& e, w; b& [/ |: _9 D

" z* n* Z3 v' [- F4 J6 ?  m$ e; VThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's9 n# F) r0 U3 {: i" T, X$ M  x
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his7 K0 `. p' T. F: b( ?
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
  E& a: P, s0 o9 i4 ]lawyer.   \8 H4 v5 d9 O: z1 \
$ \9 Q5 m4 |) Y# d0 f3 f' P/ Y/ r% p
Now, it's the newfie's turn.( |, A8 I# d* s6 q; e( C
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
  O3 I1 V6 q, Y1 Vthree legs, and comes down with four?' 1 Q! P( d% A# r  \, Y0 ^
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
* A1 B0 e1 @4 [5 rreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
& y" u& \+ G6 ^the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
( V) F2 Z# t- E  w/ C1 V3 Kof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
5 T4 f4 ]. z" |" `hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right) q% B" \; |0 f8 C$ Q8 J
back to sleep.
1 r$ _+ S% K3 h( n' `# V3 i
* W. j; F( e9 i7 ], ?6 ^1 @* fThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He0 y% s: H! h4 u% P0 M/ d
wakes the newfie up and asks, - j/ r# j8 ^5 n% V
. \0 G8 S% p1 c& F+ h) K2 a8 w3 R- g
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and& V6 V7 K; M: u
comes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5& Q' ~6 p" c: z' A, R
and goes back to sleep.
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+ A7 C0 @$ u* Y5 [
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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/ C# u2 v' M  ?+ h9 D# w& s1 C! fLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the' v* S; x4 q- U9 U) ]
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
' Q* J0 w" A4 G. x>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 8 i) a% o1 l8 x" B6 c# v
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
# @6 V1 q. F& T& a2 w>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
2 e2 l! J- ]2 [0 t- Y" [>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct* c! z6 Q4 s3 ?
$ P4 ~$ l  U, ]& Q6 X; I* @& n. {
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
2 N- A+ u) V/ F+ P- Z" o/ D* M>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
- R6 B; @- }9 T' q+ U" Z0 U>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
/ w" e1 u: b) H5 n* v- R>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 2 L* p# V6 x4 Y3 T( e
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three; R% G6 l3 E8 _+ d

9 k- W) g3 ?. i, g/ J" Y>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
+ \0 i4 ]! A% z- p>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
, k, @  G/ H5 [! w, p" f% b/ u7 A>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
  P( I5 c: |% p' @. I>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
. p% f  X' r! S& a3 @. E( f+ rA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a& @' ]0 M# Z  x* f, L
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
8 K- j* ]$ @1 @4 `3 ethat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
8 o$ u/ G0 z" M  c5 S( t4 Gthe newfie would l ...
- @; }  w2 i5 i+ y' b& ]
' P; Z0 v8 K2 G0 v' _

' n( M  ?9 M# ~- V好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
" x5 B$ Q$ p* P/ C7 P8 ]“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
" |5 ?* K5 G4 v好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 " r$ l4 Z. T  i: y
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

% ]. K: N& `: M- F1 l真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 * |$ k. _5 M6 P$ P7 r
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, M$ y% T- X0 {, ], i
5 M- ?6 ?1 Z0 l" ]! [& t/ T' H5 X1 r3 [
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:3 A8 \* j! i6 p/ G& O5 l
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
6 B5 ?3 k/ ?; [; q7 c好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

/ X6 e2 C4 F, E3 o8 K2 |真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 0 z0 {  {& d+ j& B/ [
8 @8 s. B* o. L
真聪明,偶像啊
  ^7 j) b# B! P$ O* z% S8 V; p9 O

1 |! Z8 y' x. S1 {9 K7 _全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 6 z) ~1 v. U% I# M: X
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* u; w; i# K$ F/ Y! [) h$ z全盘接受一下。
4 y3 t' o( L: H! r- U- p" B+ L
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 / G) @! D9 ^6 Z1 B  n, u! h' Y: R

7 P5 L( Q: \1 ]/ `$ s真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
. |) E8 D1 u, ]$ }+ ?9 B
" U% i- y2 e8 C' N2 [
8 X6 o3 i: a6 z+ W
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
$ q/ l& O* ^; U- }- Z
$ g3 m7 K6 t/ w1 n: n  S+ f, D1 [* {  H" r& z' \' }9 V8 Y1 h: r

4 S  i% d, k0 U别把我往坏路上领啊。
7 a3 o; r5 u$ [% }; U8 b  h
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 $ @; M/ f, W- |
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

& G6 z, |1 m' e# Y; ~多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 $ J+ I+ Q) t9 d/ p% j' L

9 d5 ]4 ^4 {/ i9 o1 i真博学,偶像啊。
5 v! G$ u' R  q2 x. w
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?
' A' k' y: ?- B  r# c大学教胖还差不多
* U/ ]8 e  v& h0 T& S- n; G7 b她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 2 N$ W4 O8 `) ~( N$ A( E
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
' |* _7 D; t& l# I/ F7 `, W
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表   v# g. Q) \' z, J$ U9 H; y
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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