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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
3 H2 x; P) ^  D- }# e/ y4 [long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb* }, t/ ~2 X: ]/ V  p
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if2 U, U, q* W5 l* _
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
( I3 ^  _! ]1 B, u4 X  / f6 `2 X+ S! T% e8 m
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
0 t& T, Y$ H0 L2 f& A" v he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The0 E" @) f) Z* k6 I1 ~  F, u* C
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I0 x6 Y. C2 M* a; G
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,& Y+ a3 l( ~2 f$ k' U  P3 V
you pay me only $5.
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; G, A  `7 T! D$ E You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I, \1 r) O0 B( F# h% }
will pay you $500. ) C% R, Z0 @  _( r8 m1 F

- ~( ~" A( s2 J2 l% E This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
& l! u2 O. l: j; X% G! m9 s& Rthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
+ K" {# w! v8 u$ V3 O
5 j: E2 p$ H0 u6 P: eThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
2 w* I3 T3 b: s! D! n5 _1 f+ z; w% wthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
1 B# @4 i$ K. T
/ U$ \; w. f3 c2 E  ~5 R7 wThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his, F: |8 j. U6 M. T$ W$ w* I
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the( v6 w. l2 M$ ~6 I
lawyer. * I  q+ W" Q1 E! P& \6 I

8 }& a1 M; d& A5 O/ INow, it's the newfie's turn.7 b- Y& R7 u  N" C* V  W7 }4 I) S: r

0 P: q& T  i+ z; lHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
9 m$ A: G/ V0 b$ ~( b4 l8 r7 Kthree legs, and comes down with four?' - K5 u3 R" f6 p: s  v3 Y! ]

. _$ P7 G* G5 c( UThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all; j4 t# M! {8 r5 G- q( T9 R$ z3 E) X
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all5 A; c2 q7 c2 l' ~, Z
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
; @9 [# U- K8 O) @4 X% Oof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and# P# s3 y3 i4 L# h* M
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
  T) b% d- O& Z3 Xback to sleep.
3 x5 D1 r5 T8 G; _8 I
+ b$ \; J! g6 I9 S# l7 G+ EThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He$ w# W: h! k0 g$ H
wakes the newfie up and asks, $ V' z6 O0 |2 `# j0 Q! P

$ ~( c9 k0 X8 y0 H, C( i'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
" I+ i' D# O; H6 F! a2 x# E+ ?comes down with four?'
; W9 H" v7 d, K
6 I: Q# y6 m' J* NThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5: K, O# a# L, I/ h7 X
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!7 R5 W; z4 g  A9 T

9 a, p5 N$ L+ uLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the, ?9 i* I4 }) B8 |
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
3 f  h" W; r* l# h>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason - M8 y! f$ u" h  {9 x5 }
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
6 O8 M  I. u  @, Z+ ^" T* g>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, * I# B6 K5 {) c. P6 Y7 Z7 V/ h
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct6 V! W; z( ~" {. i

; m5 V+ p! |( s4 Q9 X>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
' p& @6 E% B# V>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
1 n; L% d% ]8 {% R7 a$ V" d>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more ) r3 Y; W  o: m
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, ! t, [" I. q  U% t. T) b" V( B
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's " r& u2 p4 ]. Y$ U5 w& m9 u( w$ C
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the # H0 d9 j- j+ ^, p7 J; d9 N
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
0 c4 }' N* W5 {0 m>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 & ^( l# l( M2 J9 c8 G1 C& X  L8 [& K8 J
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a% Y# H% f% i6 y* e5 Q, S8 J
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
/ u$ J. J1 U" J% N4 H6 Pthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if: H2 p5 j# \0 j# }$ Z; s
the newfie would l ...

! ?7 P! Y& O/ R* P* V
- u- j1 ^; D( P; Z; i5 G) [6 Y. a; N
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
$ d9 r' c+ v0 }  h“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,* r9 X/ ?6 a* {& g) u! z
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
2 m% e: R0 T+ P. h2 P0 v2 F/ X加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

" G. p* \. W) a% ^1 H& P: h" x真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
" V% D7 e4 r* T4 [/ j0 |1 W7 M# _$ z$ A% L! i* r7 b

5 ]. ~' T3 v, M/ Q7 }7 r6 v8 _7 D% n( |
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:" [$ O, s6 K9 V" s1 r
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,  A! N; F5 n! e3 g: O* ^; V6 \) W
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

) d( ~' i% C5 l' z. s真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 1 g# x4 G& k. A/ f+ `0 _

% W; U, S; t- O( y- p" E, }" v真聪明,偶像啊

- a* L9 t- G3 I2 K2 F7 Y4 [& W' |4 w7 O  d" B* C7 o, ]* t. U
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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+ H) n) R1 [+ o
4 @  }5 b0 J- G! ^. s* [全盘接受一下。
) r. I' n% E1 S+ ~* ~# k
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
5 p8 V$ b' K, q& A
$ b; o8 k/ H4 d  i- i  i- [5 z真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
6 K5 Y! a! p/ ]2 p: |' l

7 O" P$ o" |* \, \2 g
; Q( t0 b/ J& ]  E& m别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
! f7 ^& y' F+ y2 I! T9 p/ ]  A# y' s, \
% m3 \" J- V! q' u

! E$ y, y- g* o" i7 j' g1 [' a别把我往坏路上领啊。

' S5 B9 _2 `5 I% G! e你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 + b) _2 d. e4 f4 I! {
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ! x, E4 V* h  w
8 s+ ]$ H) [% z/ g7 w" ?) z# P: L
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

# K+ r* J" G3 b3 m/ ~" X  H# ?3 Q她是大学教瘦?0 w  k2 [7 Z/ {6 K  a1 _
大学教胖还差不多 # _3 a$ E# v0 }# Z& T, H& U9 o" ~. c
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 * X( d2 O  l5 I+ j9 e0 x
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

7 j9 g! ]" W/ G说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
2 S  r- v5 M( Q  ?5 B9 ^  s6 d0 d6 L紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

. u5 s! X; d- S, C7 A2 G  V
" X: A" h7 T! o  X8 z哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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