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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
8 L/ m$ S$ T! I2 H0 X* T7 C) i7 n2 glong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb: u1 ~% ]% f) u, _& G: W
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if: d% `4 z) O7 D0 v* u
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
5 h0 U) Z5 [$ ~  1 q; E( K' _; C/ u3 f
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so) |) k) @0 X% b1 Z" X) f
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The, U- }" e% n3 x5 B$ E
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I' [  R; n# b# B0 ~
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
7 c2 @7 j% J& M8 t' i% cyou pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I  i' F' K0 j. Q  V8 B( \! c) M
will pay you $500. ; i! J0 y5 \! W! m& _- U! l, G

/ ]. T7 G/ a4 q/ n This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
9 J% t: i' N+ a4 xthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. 2 H$ n6 Y* r' S: t( S' `

6 [* L' p7 `( O7 Y" h( o" b: VThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's5 C/ Q- S# J. F7 b
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his8 k% J6 A+ X; K+ y: Q
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
8 d. a- s# q  `: g; }' r5 llawyer.
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with& D5 L+ T/ l2 u: ^; c2 S- R
three legs, and comes down with four?' 5 L, m$ h4 h3 J: l1 a- F4 V

2 V  B- k; q8 t! MThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
- a2 C' Q. ]/ ~; M/ i2 greferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all" g/ ^; C8 @& c7 [6 j/ t8 R
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
+ ?; K6 E( w7 b4 n5 l& o( lof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and9 N9 a% G+ @$ _8 U
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right+ I' X/ T; T4 _0 {( M
back to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He3 q% Q% S! j9 A! a! b4 ?, N! f- {
wakes the newfie up and asks,
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$ i* L# c: H9 k1 Q'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and' Y# M8 l- D0 I9 r3 a8 n  n
comes down with four?' / j. k3 c3 @. p5 ~
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
2 f/ @% J% `" R2 R' B4 Cand goes back to sleep.( T# n, V4 ^7 l6 L  A: _

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!4 C% e, b( {! B8 V

' [5 \& e5 d/ V3 v$ e  |Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the5 J) y; v; C5 x2 E1 _0 F2 H1 n' W
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
0 P4 E, `. \( L6 L/ c7 S, W: a# W>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
& @. H* `5 Q/ p6 S/ l+ |  U) u>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the + ]7 v9 P( O3 Z; @# z5 k& h4 X
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
2 @9 }/ V  L" P9 [; E! T! k5 E>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
4 M+ c7 c# \- \+ f3 O% Z
5 z( K$ N' _+ A) |. ?7 U6 m>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research . T: x1 g0 Z' u8 M. ]0 ~/ j
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
9 U4 p8 y' {' [9 q- W! x  G7 y>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
7 A3 I- X" ?* o; s>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
7 s$ J% G0 A. K# i' o( B% S>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
+ F0 }7 H! P  x
) ]" k7 G; X' _+ b, o>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's ' R3 D( J6 a4 A
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 9 W) ~+ j# r' X9 w8 u8 D
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
  k- P5 w1 Y2 [* o6 r>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 2 J0 Z! O' l8 i7 H& h, V7 G* {
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a- z2 g1 r3 L$ [/ }' W
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb' {' S2 c2 J# s1 K# Q7 T; m
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
, h9 X/ z( D: a! qthe newfie would l ...
3 O2 m. r; \3 c5 M  F
1 l* P& o+ K) X  a7 ~; z/ r2 b4 N

1 t( j+ E1 O. l# Z7 f2 a" e" u. w1 z好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
% h; b, s; g9 M" L“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
: a7 F. S) }' h0 S/ ~1 T好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 * S8 C  d# J; B( m; S4 ^
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

( y6 `' x# T9 D" F# N真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 . A& b7 T7 Y* ~3 A, y7 x" e/ z
4 @9 K/ W2 m1 G* T
4 ]  g& s  _( x( g7 P+ p
% W9 t9 |& h# S/ T& }8 p
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
  {0 }* m4 d" P+ i2 m/ T2 g“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,6 K, H  \( @% q/ f  J6 Y
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 7 \$ O7 y8 R+ c* m- F. a
, o' K* u% L- l) y5 \1 ?; x% K
真聪明,偶像啊

8 y: E7 f4 A+ b/ K4 `
2 G* n# _( }3 ^; q' I! y全盘接受一下。
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发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 8 v& g; ~9 `8 C8 P! L1 O
4 U9 G, [+ ^  u9 o

2 H+ z6 o$ n) X* M+ u' X$ y; N全盘接受一下。
3 _. |# {& H; K. I
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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% b: M7 S: x( B9 o. [1 H. R真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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+ h7 R4 O+ h5 A1 B" x) M0 i/ \1 {3 w4 j( o, C0 b
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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7 ?, Y& H5 H7 K6 F: d% G% b9 o  Q; h( r3 w( [: \8 |4 _
别把我往坏路上领啊。

4 ?% r' b: q/ ~你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
; z# X* K5 m3 l加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

( Z: _% [4 Y: ?! r: R1 B# i多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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0 c8 }4 ~' }1 K# I; b, l' ?- Z& v真博学,偶像啊。

0 W/ C% f8 D" }3 z" u# t8 z3 Y& @大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

& Z: c" D, I0 q2 Q1 F% y8 z' v她是大学教瘦?* {( z+ D% e" A0 j
大学教胖还差不多
! n$ \! \6 _: D; Y她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ! Q2 Q; T3 M- _! z+ k
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
+ W3 e6 d* n# [4 t2 m) L
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
8 @8 N6 Z/ q6 r/ z' V2 m/ ]# [0 x紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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