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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a: i5 J* [4 [- T$ I9 ?- I
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
' A6 @3 Z( g$ k# D7 ^0 }( Q6 bthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
% y3 a/ y& H0 J2 S1 y% E! Bthe newfie would like to play a fun game. 3 z! u; ?" X. f) i
  
: B! Q! o2 r' S) I2 ]9 y0 s The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
" u& R3 H: Y% D he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The- u6 f5 b( Y$ v. `. W3 E) s# c8 J# [
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I# I' h0 L5 q, m0 X; Q) F# z' ?2 {
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
, g# g7 _  y( l/ ^3 k' q& W4 Myou pay me only $5. 7 |/ L6 D" M/ i# r% j3 B
5 Y* s; R0 ^% W4 O( Q
You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
- I1 v  u' g0 N+ |0 k5 x will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep1 L/ I' o5 G) z  N5 \
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. : X9 ^- R# `8 q7 y: o! s
' }. }+ Y: U8 o9 D4 n' Q) _* e4 b
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
5 A/ h2 h) O0 I7 b, f% y8 uthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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9 ]8 X  H9 B% X5 R* r; P* j! UThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his7 k  d- k  w6 R3 ]% m
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the3 h5 P" {9 B+ u+ p* H+ a3 r
lawyer.
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4 \2 A) J0 L' w+ C3 vNow, it's the newfie's turn.6 Z  Y8 C- x+ A5 w. \" f

; r* ]0 U' E+ R. nHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
( r# ^/ p3 K* ^2 Qthree legs, and comes down with four?'
. u: ~& Q* w5 ?
' m1 C% N3 \% jThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all+ o, n& q1 O0 K0 `
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all7 l3 B6 U5 l( W1 Z7 d
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
7 v; u& d4 u, u. ^of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
; Q/ x7 D; B1 V2 mhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
9 c/ ^9 g: U" i* Aback to sleep. ( _% h: [! x/ B' m3 e; g
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He$ y4 V+ \. w" P
wakes the newfie up and asks,
* H' D4 V5 U5 `/ z4 g
: Q5 T4 U- j& j3 G  s3 E: y0 q0 C'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and, B* U* y% n$ x0 \" m
comes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5" B: n+ I' Z' C% s7 `  i$ _5 X
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!2 {) }2 Y  A7 N: K, |/ k

8 R& [7 v3 W* O9 `- ^8 P1 rLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the5 y2 t+ ]( d* A
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
3 `+ g1 d' U. s( C' U) v. Y>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason ) _) V) c0 }, x9 b
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
3 H, C7 R% `) {% w$ I; z- u>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, $ `- s* S! a! [% ?$ H% o
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
2 L7 k' [, }7 B. ~4 }' j4 c5 U  I>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a + G% P0 }: [% j/ L7 s7 v5 G* y6 J
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
: X* i0 o$ `* z1 I- t7 N/ f1 r>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 4 q4 k6 Z* B: |0 I
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
/ l2 p3 A' `$ H/ O) r/ T>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the ( c7 x5 B' w1 f2 Z' w2 l
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 8 ]& i+ d7 W' W- s$ d6 ?7 K' w7 g
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
9 A3 h2 _: S* }" m' V( U& t( EA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
, o2 N8 ]8 e. |1 x4 ]8 Llong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
8 m- K. s2 c# K6 p+ q/ Fthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
" R, W8 o1 D' }' K/ U- ^the newfie would l ...
: E: o: }+ Z. u# F
/ a2 h2 R6 H: T) ~

# f  c* a4 P3 I& a) V8 h8 R好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
; ?1 U% E0 v+ e3 ^) ^“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
+ e" L; O- J: S1 N: ~7 I; X% Z; O好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
/ g* m3 b; E! B: \" [" p加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

' ~2 J: Y, B, @4 l4 F5 W1 N真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表   Z! {' u% E4 i. b; K# |* q$ H
+ x6 U6 Y4 d" f& [; l% D4 Y# c  j
3 L/ H( m0 a  W% }  M! F/ D
2 G0 l4 ^4 P# M( {3 a
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:1 i2 b( E$ w) M7 L
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
4 M# G9 S( Y* H9 D6 [+ @好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

# g$ n2 c& X! X# Z5 g真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真聪明,偶像啊

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$ ^9 q3 N& U. S全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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8 a6 |  F0 Z( i( D* v
6 T/ t' ?$ j$ y. |7 m% G全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 7 m9 b  D' {$ q! n; _

4 l6 X3 J. F) M& s' M+ `# c# M真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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9 ^; D* H6 n' @& {/ g9 u) S7 V3 c' a
' G+ Z/ X& b8 e& Q7 l+ B5 [  R别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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0 {: x3 F1 Q2 v; k+ K( r$ R3 f
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 , K, b- [* l1 S* h9 J
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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$ Q( P& q9 P5 \! c真博学,偶像啊。
2 \2 d9 G8 Y- p+ V' v% B. k* s( @2 ]
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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5 Y: X  v, R  p' A大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?
% Q8 m1 s8 l/ h9 ]$ z( A8 X& T大学教胖还差不多
1 ]- C& D' l0 s) I. S她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
8 C% e5 C/ u# U2 K紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

7 W% v) s: C6 {: S说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ! |. l1 L4 p& l; v# S2 ?
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
: {! k$ R. D. {- C, y0 E

. b! H. W0 T$ X: k哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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