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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
6 `& {6 N, W# q& d  elong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
3 g; x1 v) P5 a+ T  hthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if% c9 J3 B; j* ?% R
the newfie would like to play a fun game. , D3 y+ @: E8 t9 k( z7 a- }
  
' ]( {6 v# B1 Z" M0 { The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so% X& A4 e! J3 k+ c7 l
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
. G6 ~9 h5 X+ r7 d lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I! Z( C8 x9 B9 E
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,( d* P& z  r6 H6 X) y
you pay me only $5. - u6 H- K2 w0 Z* v9 p2 p; a
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I  D! n2 ~" w2 u/ P* ~" p. x
will pay you $500.   {, D5 Y* ?8 t- F: V( }

7 z) ?% `5 d& F0 s This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
$ g9 J* n) X/ a6 k# [& o, D% Jthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. / k# k8 E7 ~& j6 Q( u# S

1 V7 |. d, X, V) U" t9 oThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's+ P7 m( p, n9 c: u' h7 _# j; I% y
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'   p4 x) ~6 K: G& U4 R
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
& r* J  S9 o9 i' u' Rpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
% {" f% u- v- olawyer. ( A4 l. j: f2 a( t* M0 x' p
& P5 U0 k1 Z* q6 R
Now, it's the newfie's turn.3 N. Z  T! O/ G* B- R1 n

, x/ |( `; J" R7 i# d1 J  XHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
& ~( T; f4 p& O6 G7 _9 L; Q' {three legs, and comes down with four?'
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' P$ _- j6 L1 n1 T" [( bThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all. ]3 k; T. b- T( ~
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all- t+ o) j/ \% r7 o) j
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour3 ]7 t: s- M1 P6 }0 O% S5 r
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
3 J" Q, O1 M/ f) k- `7 Ohands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
+ Z( A  S- Q- s9 `& r2 u. Mback to sleep. " O; G9 `' B4 |  E  \
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He( Q1 u; {( t# B" g- {( H  _
wakes the newfie up and asks,
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  L) \$ e) T2 E( [7 c'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
* E4 F# ~# _# R4 x5 zcomes down with four?' ' v. ?" u" J' N1 _8 Z& W) z; n
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
* V% O7 C' l1 P# x& V: e5 b2 Z# sand goes back to sleep.* q% b& {& `4 z
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!' w. b1 ?4 P0 }& m4 r7 r, U

7 Z! ~8 y5 g2 [+ x! t; p' o7 JLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the& @7 w  a3 B! n; U

2 t0 t/ }2 d# u* x  ^9 [7 L) c>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
  B3 T+ x5 j8 T7 [6 X>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
% g+ O, G: m: `- v' h>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the " I5 r: S' g3 T( I8 J6 a" }
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
% e& s4 s5 ]- P) |>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
2 R  ?3 A) G5 ~$ c8 L0 d, p, I: e
9 b8 H" C" ~: ]( I2 b# k1 y) c) W>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
, N8 [5 O+ ?1 u& c6 F* f- }4 i( q>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a , }5 s9 L- u. ]: a! F
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more " w- x" j% d; q7 \8 S" I& f
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 0 F& D- \( z- |8 R7 v1 I
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
% {. X+ I+ V% N4 z" q, W0 o6 {8 r% i# [1 f5 _
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's & w  j6 _8 h6 l
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
: T% n( z8 t9 S>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand & P4 s8 n2 \8 m2 ?7 B
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
1 a3 [( Q/ T+ }) g: \0 s! T6 \6 jA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
/ Z- B$ o# j. N0 O: O. ~long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
" E, V/ m  Z; E* I7 n, H& ^. Othat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if9 q  \6 O, P' t, y6 ^; Z: |( E
the newfie would l ...

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% o& n) p3 E; M7 M% h% |+ _6 C- x7 ^0 P" d/ U9 W  [
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:: k# ?, P, z2 ]  J0 m
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
/ q" ~$ X; r2 y  m- f) t) [* `好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 - K: s$ ]" G: o! l& Q
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
( J, I" e! K# H! Z1 ?
真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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3 F5 }6 u( L5 O* b) k, O! }2 E
2 l2 W" `* l: u. V5 |; }# {
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
1 h1 [7 f7 t0 E# r“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
% N+ }$ _2 ?6 L; ]" G好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
" O' A1 m  O+ P# c- H- n! ?6 C4 _
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 5 s+ n4 P/ n0 W; }* @( F$ }5 }

# L& w6 S" J; [) R6 v# q真聪明,偶像啊
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全盘接受一下。
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发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 8 \, b" {6 N' b( E! F

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4 v+ }! w0 T4 W; y2 i, W全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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* e$ \  D0 p& T% ]1 c真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

8 F% p2 c1 m3 n, w# V2 l" ^% z$ [5 N, C) X1 U$ g9 \

7 e0 u+ R. D0 I4 N  ]9 G别把我往坏路上领啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表   u9 s' Q/ U. Q* U

/ W5 t6 d" d! H3 l8 J& e" I9 ]+ t# z0 b
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ; t4 v9 p2 [- Q* Q
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 6 q; m. ]7 k1 @; V
; [) G+ G) i) J% Q0 s$ I% A
真博学,偶像啊。

( `' Y' R( T4 {' o( _6 W大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 " s" f" e0 t/ P& H
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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她是大学教瘦?, Z# s# {4 \# R6 O# J+ S
大学教胖还差不多 " A4 M* g3 J1 X! e) _2 D0 D3 s( V
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
" u! S# o* p5 E5 \* e( R4 C1 T% ~紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

+ N5 V  ]9 S- U" E' b# L说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
大型搬家
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
( _* k" M9 [+ a0 z紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

, o% Q$ D$ R5 |9 ?9 p4 h( \- |2 X& C& t  N0 O: e
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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