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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a7 a# i" o3 b; @% B
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
: @" b/ E5 s+ D5 hthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if: M# Q$ h0 o5 `# S) a, }
the newfie would like to play a fun game.
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
8 C( @' F2 C' V9 \* g he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
9 ?4 W* z4 ]5 M5 g0 _4 l7 B lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
& w6 p& I! D+ D$ E6 l; P1 G5 xask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,' a# t% H9 x7 K2 a- P/ \# V
you pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
: M9 r' ?6 J4 h/ F* L will pay you $500. 5 ]+ W# a- c! P( z

5 v0 p5 I7 i6 N: { This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
' M9 I; }' s. Y3 {6 t8 qthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
' X+ {5 _2 ?/ y" B, y" M% _( `) l; e
The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
0 d& J3 p; L2 \the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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7 v. I" V- E& u; Y7 _* R: uThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
" T( ^+ G  S1 `- w9 [5 tpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the& o- X5 I% U  k" t! f( \' i
lawyer.
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$ }5 g- y: F0 q9 N; A6 q" ~Now, it's the newfie's turn.
: z8 t: y3 l3 G! S+ x! y3 o$ b* }
0 M% N0 z' |8 u, y7 THe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with- F9 H! _. u8 Y' p. v& T. @
three legs, and comes down with four?'
: [$ F  j# E3 Q1 f! j9 G. c( t; S4 F# w: h, r/ o
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
: w1 y) h8 I) l3 Y5 Lreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all! g; X/ K; U( ^6 T4 p+ G% j/ t9 m
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour+ j' R+ z  r, u' E1 C% w, o. ], O7 t
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
) ]! f* b2 x2 j) }3 E/ _% F% D8 X' M. Fhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
0 u) x1 L7 R' ]. `3 s# Q+ Cback to sleep. $ ]9 y1 m+ G7 R; k. u. ]

; r4 G9 X7 |  P. ^) a5 E0 @The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He, S' D( N; z7 V4 q' e, U$ Y' _/ A
wakes the newfie up and asks, 3 f& {& G% C# v* R: P( i  ?8 F
, ?) |1 f0 z, L$ o; t9 T# J
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and; n8 N! ]/ @1 \' U+ q% u
comes down with four?' 6 \2 R- D9 A" `( R

: a/ r  ^: z6 D, v, T( I% kThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
$ T9 |. b1 E" l, C8 R# ?1 P4 M1 cand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
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/ Z3 N# W$ l6 }2 Z! v9 RLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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+ s: W% u, H, z; D; ]$ k>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two # z4 P7 i7 ^! K  X3 S( Y
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason % @0 v, x& l) y5 J) i& M( v" z
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
8 r7 c( t! ~: }! ^0 Q>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
  ]. \& m5 E/ x9 W& R) g7 t/ [>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
+ b( [! V3 `8 {2 j4 |0 ?
! s  n4 Q6 Y7 D! m* V: ~>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research ) m3 Q: g$ Y: n' V1 Y
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a . F6 \3 i$ U; n8 y. {+ H. Q
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
  h" l6 c) Y+ U  G>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
% s$ t0 x; ]9 Y6 o6 S+ Z( ?- w>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
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- u2 _; t8 r- U+ D( ?# d>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
: h6 i0 `- K. @3 |>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
% A2 M; y2 D, ]- I4 x: y3 A>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
3 x+ L2 q1 v& ^) h' D" [; u4 U. n>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
/ @2 I7 S& q4 }2 wA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
: D' O& d2 S  ~long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
4 w4 [8 G/ |- \' Z) Athat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
6 t2 n9 i% i9 B' b7 w/ Othe newfie would l ...

7 h% Q/ d' e* s1 m# U& Q6 D  p9 [+ q7 R$ O8 a0 Q

* c; Y  b) @( G好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:! R! O$ @0 x7 o1 V' Q- o
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
% W6 s$ b. `; s) z( p# ^+ n好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
7 N3 s/ c: T* n/ {加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
2 I( U9 t( s9 T, x& Q# e; L! V" I  V$ [
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 # P  v* \' n  D
* X5 D' |8 _0 E9 C

( Y2 W9 C' `6 V" v, _
. z- \1 ^- j* J% O9 G1 \好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
) E2 H/ J7 [3 A$ W* v0 z8 h! }“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
5 \& Q' w/ ]( Q8 c# Z好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

6 D) o& D6 Z1 n+ y真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 7 W' B4 _, v* r8 o5 C; q1 m

+ o5 f1 J  Q9 U8 v+ Z7 W真聪明,偶像啊
! Q. x; ^3 O$ P
0 |8 D; t9 d+ E& R
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ; B7 T, R1 T6 ^# q4 B. m. x& w+ U

+ G1 R2 \; g% l3 L$ e+ R  N2 j: D: P5 R" D& o
全盘接受一下。

; m8 ?: k0 ?) [4 {1 H$ B, e! j真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 / b: s5 U7 B- m/ P/ s# D8 D  R, j

( T& Q/ \1 z# ^2 W4 E- m7 x真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
2 W+ I; V$ J& \' C

0 R( A4 J- V  l% u- i% A; P$ I+ j( v( q+ G: N  i
别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ; v9 Z, \# \0 |3 R, R+ C% |3 F

" G. |. Q1 u1 J9 w; D1 Q7 A0 {) ]
, y) r% x4 D9 b. R/ ~5 J8 ~- ?# Z; P& {% b* I
别把我往坏路上领啊。
) @4 [  e  g5 }. x8 I4 f) A3 W1 {
你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 2 {* p9 D1 i8 {& X2 |1 B: {
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 . M7 O! @5 T4 s% |  }! z7 o

/ [; {; x' V: ]- R真博学,偶像啊。

  f* i( x1 Y7 T大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ) c  D# S2 O: M, E

% H1 l+ P. y" Y2 c) i1 {7 G大学教授哦,能不剥削?
( p8 e4 i1 s7 I6 c* ]$ Y
她是大学教瘦?
- `+ _5 R/ a# ^  y: I( N3 f大学教胖还差不多
5 u) F6 z& J& n0 x3 `她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
6 v9 k" E7 x3 p& o! a8 p紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

( P2 G# b; A/ C" {说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
9 i+ w! E  a& c4 s紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

1 \( @7 _4 G' T- h9 P' z$ a
$ M8 G* `2 O: |- }% X, _哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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