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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
2 _  b( X" G- p0 U  Nlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
- }% t  P& l+ f9 D& k6 b" d$ {1 n. Nthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if9 P% _  Y" W- r( G+ K( X
the newfie would like to play a fun game. 5 H* w! u1 f+ M- t5 H( q
  : R5 a( y( I' a" c2 f
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so5 _; U! A1 b; Y6 p$ t* g" I% R
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The% f( f0 v4 t6 N
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I2 B9 |/ H: _  H4 [3 A  X8 b9 p
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,( u* J5 K* u, Q) i
you pay me only $5. ' I/ v/ m% }; N3 d2 l( U$ K# \

+ _* {4 _9 e6 b4 \- v# D5 D You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I# p0 _3 b" X/ B, `# B8 ^
will pay you $500. ' O* f* B5 p$ o/ s6 b

* J) J) T7 {$ C' V& } This catches the newfie's attention and to keep( I0 v' T1 T+ ]. a$ t
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
- f2 i3 R. M  G3 o' J# j
& f$ v" `/ d; aThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
# g2 s+ q* X3 E# B3 Pthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
! n" w; r4 k& Q  M9 Z0 Q% Apocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the1 y* e. d8 f1 D& r0 y- X& U9 q
lawyer.
: ?% q& k3 s6 {+ e: Q& }7 |: K: d; c! r% r1 E8 z6 {
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
0 v5 w5 \, s0 W4 d+ z1 Q
0 \; u3 V3 }8 t* OHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with1 m0 ?, t" a0 C2 u% H
three legs, and comes down with four?'
; c" J( g' G" [' J1 H6 J! K5 y
) \, X8 F6 E  X3 qThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all0 q6 G, N# Z4 P* C7 ?* H
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
: v& M. Y( K" kthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour. j8 V" E" p8 C' B8 e) z, D' v
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
, n* h; N% V% D, F5 F5 shands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
3 m1 K" J& N( q4 d5 Y7 F% ?back to sleep. ! D2 w4 i! b$ h9 x1 t' \

9 m4 ]7 a: ?  RThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He( w  a+ q/ Z3 a/ \
wakes the newfie up and asks, # t8 Z6 W1 `, Y6 U. f" q

' o9 [" ^/ b! }1 ^9 g0 W* C+ u'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
! ^' t5 _6 x% A) h% T* a& J8 I* U& q' rcomes down with four?' & e: U5 K: T' u& y) l6 z  J3 h

& P/ W, y; n, l+ CThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
, x' V% q( O' A, gand goes back to sleep.
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4 p( b9 f7 N# D1 w. `' J$ a
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!2 X; D$ {, G- K4 B  u* Y& t

' D8 r- u2 p4 O& C  F$ [. BLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
( X, D: r* ^: J. H7 @+ y3 a( q- f  r5 C9 v& ~
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two + n! ^6 w8 a- y; V4 f
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
) k3 z6 y: C. ~>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the & N2 p' L% U# O+ w$ Z4 O2 d2 ]
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
3 [; ~  I. I" g+ g. U4 [& Q>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct# p# r7 s0 P) E6 o* @& U/ F. Y
7 ?; r' f% @/ q. N
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
8 H% ?0 O, [) L$ @0 x& x>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a 4 F! h1 j' Y( r% f8 `6 d
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
9 p# R2 R8 X  @0 w3 U" P5 E>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
+ ~6 [) \/ C; F6 M>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
" H2 g6 X/ t8 b) M3 U2 U! ^4 ?" ?7 z$ Y8 {# p
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
. e7 p, {' C# ^" W>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the . M2 \" E; _" l+ W6 e
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
5 J, l  `) J  c7 y( H! w! E0 x>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 - G8 c3 t1 z, d
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
1 ^0 t9 f$ L5 s" m' Vlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb7 V+ K& Y. R, Y% `8 [6 F. r
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if" B/ g8 t) ?( f* |
the newfie would l ...

& H/ Y1 K# U' {: v% D
& G4 b! O, A! P! s8 e5 c7 O
  i4 T! n# V* o& f; i+ v! \$ w好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
' k- S0 s2 r" a, l( m/ c. V“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,& o+ z0 B9 `7 {* X9 a: A& g
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 % N. G  Y1 I7 p7 {& v8 _
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

* w" d. i8 j: B% R, S, Y1 b7 y真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 0 ^" x. ^3 K/ T" |# M
! d. ]$ y9 u* b* t* Y9 M
5 `; _" F4 a# D. o! G# Y7 ]" `

1 t" h$ B: y8 `2 n6 I好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
0 L" x* t8 T( |& [; m/ E“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,7 U" @/ s4 ]+ V
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
. F, U/ C  h- l- q% d2 \2 }5 ?
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 : i. s+ G$ A6 W5 I9 \

) c& U9 ^" {5 z( `9 K真聪明,偶像啊

3 n) P9 v' k* k, }: \3 ~' |
8 B* T0 Z" ]  |& Q+ Z全盘接受一下。
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发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 ) C& I% v  F5 B1 v  _) O( C
. o- N6 L9 k/ g

# \, W7 N$ {0 g全盘接受一下。
8 ~, \( k& l5 Y9 f
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 9 m, F# _3 W  D' p: K

3 w* v' r6 Q, K1 j2 S) h% n真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
  ]3 W- X" h# N$ R9 M
0 w0 w, {" t" ]4 @3 v

; k8 }0 d% Q2 N( t: G: b2 Z别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 6 O) v, L6 E( S! }/ j/ D/ Y3 A; F

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: L% w" v: T$ |) i  }. A. @3 A+ U- h- }2 B8 ]- Z# Q. x
别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ( H. c4 B; E1 x1 }
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
6 X; s  X6 ?- f9 z5 E- l- w& H
多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
* |/ _$ \% ^  w0 L0 e+ B5 [% m, p
# U/ l. S! U5 z' J- s  _真博学,偶像啊。
) ^) _% n3 ~! q3 V1 K; _
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 9 Q2 w0 t# X7 ?4 a
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

& J  T$ C0 F! J( {她是大学教瘦?& d( ~: ~  u8 ]8 \
大学教胖还差不多 & k+ I, C8 R; v* F# s
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
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发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
- u" _4 N' [) }$ o( r, t紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
' J) R: Z- F# q0 v( T& c0 w2 |
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
1 ]+ Q3 r; ?1 N7 X2 y紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
' y4 I) z- y1 p+ o1 A6 `& T( K1 r* B. @

) [2 `0 P6 f7 U/ s' j$ |哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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