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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
; f1 C6 v2 l; j( v0 a( Dlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
! K4 C- ^# H. Y- Gthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if5 l7 ^* S$ o) S# W
the newfie would like to play a fun game. $ ?7 D  t! D+ l4 d: |
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so5 t  S8 ?: e# f$ W7 ]" K$ v' _8 M
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The+ x0 L) t' H) E3 D; @
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I* G. h6 s  v2 Y6 U( H
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,+ i8 G# U" ~( r$ ]3 y4 T
you pay me only $5.
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You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I9 G4 t0 E; t$ Y) d) D
will pay you $500.   _) O) H* i, M2 \2 Q. g% |

$ x3 H6 e5 N. L9 n: r This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
' _; w3 D9 W) Q1 j1 z4 g% \the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's$ L7 n7 n; Q0 X" i
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
- u1 K+ l' |: ?) zpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
4 Q$ x3 f  z7 M" X3 t5 Vlawyer. ( @; f# D' o2 R7 x/ I4 Z

7 N4 B  i, f3 T% _( uNow, it's the newfie's turn.
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- `; A$ l" X; b7 dHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
( {( ~* b& H7 ]& N0 S0 s- Cthree legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all/ @6 Q5 ^9 s  b5 ~, C3 G
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all' u! k& T5 ^( S
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour, Y# S7 U, f7 v# D
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
0 N7 x4 O7 V$ p2 \# F; ?( c3 c1 {hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
+ c/ K/ z5 B" X0 |back to sleep. - U0 z" ?9 R, c' u8 A5 A# z
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
% g& @+ y* ?+ {wakes the newfie up and asks, ( S' Z5 o2 ]/ U5 I
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'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
4 Q& u$ n% Q1 w, h1 F$ @( Fcomes down with four?'
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. {$ E- v* h4 o! B; E5 Q  O8 {The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
* Y3 E9 g1 N' cand goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!8 r) e1 E* [5 |7 Y* A$ c
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two ( D3 d0 Y. c+ R/ s
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason $ O: P* n# g; {' e
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the 8 @2 ^- r* l& Y% M0 A
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, 8 x* N# H4 z6 h1 K+ [  b
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct. g  j3 i- P: z9 O5 K  U

3 B5 I; e' b4 j) a8 Y>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 2 K+ i) a* A' {3 X; j; z! j
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a * }: Y' e$ F' \$ c& O
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more - x: R! n7 ^* E6 J9 ^3 U& t" F
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, & O. Y. n- t$ T! n# _1 ?( c3 Z: X0 c5 |
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three3 x) q' [% A( G4 S  @
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>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
# ]9 S) x& O3 d7 I/ n>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
) F) I6 [# H/ y* w>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
, H# U- I* Y  l' J% r" p2 c; n>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
6 p8 A6 c8 p" Y! y# s% JA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a. `1 H' ^0 Z. R8 f5 z
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb8 L4 t* ?1 [1 l1 ~5 q4 {
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if( Y( r$ v: C  F5 D% [6 n2 U( `
the newfie would l ...
) L% Y; b9 t5 ]$ d

: w" b8 r8 p9 p$ f! X7 K
: i$ \' R, y: l: M" B' d好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:" M2 j' s$ y: _- M. u4 N
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,- Q3 a- D7 s; M- X5 j1 H
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 - j% l9 r; e# w9 y  ~. o
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 7 F* x9 B( g) l( Q
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* u0 v/ @( r2 D' `( S. E8 {( n. a7 A" s/ v
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:+ v! ^3 C' J: W3 c0 t
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
, ]* w' O" h8 l, z/ H好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

* F% L9 e. k6 D% t; t, Y' D! |真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ' F1 O" s, l, `2 {+ o

5 P7 m; ^/ h2 M! J% A1 R3 T真聪明,偶像啊
6 c4 l5 e' |: B  ^

# w6 a# Q1 c1 b  I全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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* D% e+ Z9 o0 a/ _- _& Y; m* N, E全盘接受一下。

, f+ B5 N, s) K) L, F3 ~真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 . |6 O6 h- q3 W' `' v3 \9 o5 k
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 : Z" J1 Q2 A1 h: T1 v/ \. ^

5 ]. ]: r8 ]; u7 K
, w" I( j; D% P0 W! ~5 ]8 V' o3 k5 N' x3 b
别把我往坏路上领啊。

5 ~: t. t8 `5 }% F你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ( y& @, S* c; `/ z3 d3 `
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ! l6 S- Z: K+ C/ Y) L. O

  O( C) I0 s, E" w6 w- T/ t真博学,偶像啊。

8 b' c$ n1 X3 g8 b, l! _- y大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

6 n+ C; R1 E4 W2 F$ u' E她是大学教瘦?
. D# p! H3 b" \3 E  B大学教胖还差不多
/ @4 b, Q- x- N( X她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
  T2 d3 Z9 B  Q! I" Y+ ^' ]( E紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

) Y$ f) f  R  m说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
4 W& ]1 |2 ]8 x, e1 r紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

* T9 `' A" ?! a+ F/ Q6 ^
) b* z) N: n: z. c" ?哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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