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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
8 S' J' }2 o6 w2 h8 Clong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
9 O6 d0 E0 z1 Qthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
4 [* Y3 ?5 w- x% A+ e2 Sthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
# q; v8 ]; H( w! b he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
$ W8 ?- K+ O" n8 _) | lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I; k. b! l7 |$ S
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,2 U! }2 {0 N1 H( |3 T6 h2 P# G
you pay me only $5.
/ E3 w1 i6 s1 W& Y
# k1 L. R0 L9 Q: S8 w; a You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I* I% y. e' C6 ]) L/ d; V* i4 N
will pay you $500.
, B7 p7 ^( ~5 z; F
3 \% R- b. A  r3 @  @$ e& m This catches the newfie's attention and to keep. @! S6 ^9 F$ S, j' H: L- ?0 \
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
  ?; z( [: T) j; t6 V; {2 B2 S
, k; s5 u1 F1 `. q1 kThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
" _$ P! h# z! i( ?0 hthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
% C2 x0 y; n& L* U
! ~1 M& C  o$ N4 eThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
4 q1 _( h; A! o* G/ ]2 Lpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the& U9 R! I6 v8 N2 a7 i
lawyer. " H/ o# D! ~" k# ]

6 e1 A/ U0 s" V; z) _# P# Y/ W% WNow, it's the newfie's turn.
+ y+ A# R2 O; W/ t9 |0 d
8 c% @& P! A  X) X9 R: hHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with- l  W# p7 y% f$ i" L/ n9 i0 _
three legs, and comes down with four?' 2 k8 V) G: v* {; i& [

6 w. S) J( J6 ~- b; I& k: }The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all- o+ q! S$ Y) P( j) z8 F# M
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all- v+ x: i" D& b
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
$ T, Z9 U# @$ Z5 q+ k$ Y6 Xof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and9 d5 U- \0 k& U) A2 d& q* C0 h
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right* D% f' |8 p% p2 W6 u
back to sleep. ) y% _$ |2 P# S2 N# \0 j/ q

- }" c" X8 J; @6 |$ R$ O+ ^. ~" ]The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
" H; U3 ]3 I/ Q* f8 c" X8 y$ Y, ywakes the newfie up and asks,
4 S) [8 Z9 T* ]9 I7 k6 p7 Q! ?: u1 O. i3 t6 `+ O- J0 `: u
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and5 L; J! d+ J1 u- d+ K: i
comes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
- K( S) Z7 S6 ?/ F. L1 ?! N% b. w$ }and goes back to sleep.7 _" H' M0 ~! A0 ^- ?

7 F! v/ L6 x; ]1 m* P. [
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!' h4 h1 q4 ^9 G5 V6 G& ~' K3 |
; a% w4 ~! l* i4 s3 c6 ]* Z/ w
Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
% P& R# Q6 N8 h# F8 i' o$ h1 b
1 b2 S! @: D/ R5 {- A& _( M>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two 0 m1 C& Y( p, M* f3 O7 p
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
3 @4 K# Y# _+ {>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the * K# ]9 R9 V; L3 [6 Q- Y' Y% i4 H
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
" p. B# o, |6 l4 J- l# F) S>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct) i$ {8 R7 f( A: |3 g- @
  L& f% q4 ]3 z# e, u. Q; G. f
>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research . S0 D; g# p! l: p. V% C! @
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
8 W5 j1 k; i7 m, I/ F& i>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more ' ~- f+ ?% T) F! y2 n  M
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
+ ?' F! j0 G: U6 K9 s: l5 p>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three. Q6 i: \* e8 Q
. Y  {* V" }4 L- T$ ?! O- l
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
7 I2 ^8 w! f5 z' _8 ~4 ~/ @  J* [>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the ) x; u! C' ]8 l- ]2 P
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand 6 Y' V0 j6 N% x3 d
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 / b1 v& A% s1 x
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a  ]* x+ o1 y3 `, A' _
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
+ t# T  b7 }" q' ~that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if6 L4 N! b! `4 P
the newfie would l ...
- B" l/ _, ]. P& @& i8 _1 o

' `6 N3 q+ S) `# h0 x6 g8 o2 f) J/ J. C& Q9 ^; q# N5 D
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
( O# `; ?  a; [“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
( I/ _2 B% m2 n" D好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
2 l8 V) n! x. V6 |' T" n: F4 Z* A4 v加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
+ G. W* o% b3 C
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
% V7 T6 M* ?' a9 S$ s0 c( h/ e2 D" f& e
0 U" J4 A+ P% Y5 E0 v$ K- O

+ {# A/ p0 f" q6 t好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:! N4 R9 Q8 r  X$ ]
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,( g, h# }7 \6 i2 D
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
9 P; _, a, A$ P; A
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
8 s5 I! D$ {  D; U: _( s% n
- [1 `7 s, s1 L真聪明,偶像啊
" w* B: @' |1 D' N( i7 c2 K

9 H+ X  W/ m  i$ V全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
$ r# R7 k$ Z3 m( V# v/ @# z
  N" E, h0 F$ l# _7 p# g; z
. l6 O4 ?7 s! r全盘接受一下。

# ^; E+ p  W, m5 ]! K. H真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 2 n& g( A4 w6 V. b

8 W9 U( w, s6 \' x, U6 t5 G真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
8 ]' d& m2 o" Z' x2 |

8 ?- _4 [9 @% p6 t
, s5 ~5 I$ k4 g" T0 [别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ' r3 S* F' e; C% y% ~* |

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/ r1 ~' h' H2 M# k: O9 w6 y别把我往坏路上领啊。
1 {% D- i: d; B4 j1 P' e
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
7 Z; L( C1 L  u加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

" a  |& ^7 g2 o$ @/ H! W- o" ~多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ; a" I9 O/ B. I$ V% I

% h8 W1 \" _2 p) I2 Y真博学,偶像啊。

2 |8 P3 G4 e" [6 I( n; O大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 ; V9 |# @1 U! M# y, l; |
7 g/ q" D( b5 _& g! T; }
大学教授哦,能不剥削?

/ [- @7 x3 @, ]+ {. W她是大学教瘦?
0 ?. E. f" f& ]! v9 A8 T大学教胖还差不多
3 D8 |9 u- y$ a; p' a8 O( m她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 & `, X4 _0 y  \$ s; J# Y/ O
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
) i3 ]* {, l& P1 {6 V( y
说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
大型搬家
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
  Z0 }7 i; _- L紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
  W0 ^6 s9 {3 y& s* t

+ g2 }# p  k% J, @$ ^1 k& N哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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