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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
: @; }! L5 g4 R0 [8 s5 glong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
, \7 h, v. O! [: z# G8 Ythat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
3 ^) z; K% {7 ?( ]1 jthe newfie would like to play a fun game.
$ y# O/ e" z* C, _, z  P+ u  
6 C) U- P* O. t The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so, P1 u8 H) C: i+ D8 \1 S! |
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
4 k% O! z% r& ^; Y6 G8 F4 V& j lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I, Y3 z8 P0 B1 n& {4 K
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,  v  `, U  S* Z$ }* o# `
you pay me only $5.
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$ A. H' f  m" N6 b" U' F7 v You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
* F0 ]" J8 h6 X6 M4 h5 e  b- Q$ k/ J will pay you $500.
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2 U* A  R2 i9 Z' L+ T5 ?3 z This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
' R& }- H, Y2 L3 a( ?$ J: ]/ T8 {the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. & k& v' L% z2 G5 ^  @) B0 L4 ]

8 U/ ]0 O- B8 r& K3 GThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's8 e7 t; q; s/ P4 A  D
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 9 Z/ d8 e  l- p! C) M: `
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
/ I! o& R! X6 k. p+ N6 e5 D" Ppocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the( a3 [1 ]3 b3 ?" T2 D
lawyer. : T$ ?* M/ g; o# e  K3 m2 o
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
1 z4 J& B* M& `( z+ v2 p$ Sthree legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
0 g8 {8 E' U- _' W7 C: r. _5 zreferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all  Y4 j2 ^6 C2 C* H4 V4 m- S
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour* E, Q# c; m% u+ Y6 @# K
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and/ q7 {' W) Z) }# u1 V! k# z5 j
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
  Y* j, D( U9 A, Z% \/ P" x! l% nback to sleep.
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& I7 _, m: P: ~% I: tThe lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He& y) E) j- j* B- y0 j8 E+ Z. W
wakes the newfie up and asks, , @8 _6 L( v8 q8 }4 e; R

" i/ Z/ T5 [: S' ?+ W: W* Z9 H'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and' o) p! m5 T2 H/ y( U
comes down with four?'
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The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
+ e- m' O5 q$ s6 A9 S9 kand goes back to sleep.
$ T. }2 t& b% R$ N* r3 W  c! T* c
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!! n) m0 v" U4 W- M# |2 W/ u9 v, Y

+ f5 |: `4 R0 L- l; X' ~) tLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the8 r+ K' \# j- J7 @& z* D2 N) J

7 e) T$ W2 I1 @% F/ j! v>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
4 t  A% r) z- r9 r/ B>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
3 c' y. W# I! f8 H; y/ m1 C( f2 D>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the ' j. P* a& t4 u0 x
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
& {7 p) G! ^: s3 O>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct9 I9 B( U2 U  y6 h- ~# L8 b

; A+ F6 a& V  u5 k- r3 h>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research ! F( f! j* B7 ~. Q
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a ( q. b( L  c% D# V+ D' P9 W
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
2 F) j, K6 u: r! D& b. r6 v1 k/ P>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
, M$ S  [: U: F>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
- \: e. Q0 R; d9 K: R) V! R. [1 n) t; h, W. ~  I
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's : z7 j* h0 z& ~5 q# C
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 9 n) Y1 P$ L  ?$ G
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
0 @, b7 E8 h4 i5 K$ w>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 ; u* N. ^2 O# z5 G
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a7 o! ?3 n1 y' F5 @3 S
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
* L: Q0 S- h, ~/ d! h# S4 ?7 kthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if% }2 d, M3 M/ {9 a: W$ `
the newfie would l ...

+ |6 }5 N* F: ~) M5 r7 P% j/ z# Z% \& L$ j3 F8 c
( N! e; l0 ?) j, G. \7 T  u1 d
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
. C4 J/ w4 B0 F1 R( o, t“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,& T& |- i8 M$ Q1 |7 _
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
5 U8 j- m6 ~$ U/ n4 {加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
' a% |1 \5 t) Q4 w! U
真博学,偶像啊。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表
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$ J1 x1 i# a+ A4 t
9 O" Q  W5 q; E8 G/ n
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:2 @$ d* c0 P0 d5 |; \
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,& {- W7 O1 }, |! c0 h# W6 M
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

7 k# f1 A, O0 q% O! c+ B真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
* ?5 A+ Y9 Q& V$ [1 a4 V9 F- _
# r- L% s3 Q  q6 l: Z3 Q0 f真聪明,偶像啊
1 u, p/ h  h( c2 y/ X

. w9 [" C1 g5 y& r- v3 Z1 \全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 " C: m6 y+ c7 R
! ?" M5 {' y1 e3 l/ C

- x* W" Q. f, W1 S全盘接受一下。
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 - P& E: }: d0 J* I8 ^0 f5 K: B

5 }; i7 a7 E) d; G4 Y' f# i5 U% t& z0 @" }  z$ _! F( y

8 i" X2 n! k8 P1 n; _6 E$ X& b别把我往坏路上领啊。

4 W6 @/ ]; ~2 c3 T$ m你已经在路上了
大型搬家
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
1 o" n& t: Y. r: ?  y. B加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

( o7 Z+ C8 ?. J; a多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
$ h1 M# o  c% N7 K
) ^  {$ m8 B! T4 Q; B, V" A真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 7 R7 l7 n2 D/ k6 H2 z9 b
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?

5 d3 L& J/ |3 A( e" B+ U她是大学教瘦?. m5 O6 N9 v" n9 f; B, \8 R' \0 f
大学教胖还差不多
1 H5 t* q: T* c# s/ y  Y她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 9 a) D& [5 `, v
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 2 E  |) `& h* P: Q
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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