埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 4459|回复: 20

Newfie Joke

[复制链接]
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a* f" j7 x9 Z" d
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb$ Z/ y. H' ~: E% J! u
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
2 y6 ?% w5 t; ?+ othe newfie would like to play a fun game. ; l0 r2 y6 e% l% d$ u( y9 d
  / z  i4 d0 H5 {# T" b
The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so% c' p+ @  i- W9 ~9 k
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
. r0 `! s1 z8 V4 q6 v: b# U4 l lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I' ]1 `  Y9 q7 [
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,3 {8 B$ c! H4 |4 X% t
you pay me only $5.
1 Y& H6 L- D. Y  k
7 G* }9 S0 Y7 l# @" M You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I" \3 B* @  E) S! [
will pay you $500.
( G& j0 H% a$ ^) q3 o( c  w5 O5 ]' g
9 j2 z7 l- }- ^; W+ c$ R+ b This catches the newfie's attention and to keep$ o5 W& n" L; H  [
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. + P7 u% T1 z! f7 z$ e0 X+ v

1 b- z4 F# |# l: q8 WThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
$ m1 ~9 {2 @5 E1 P; J1 X' Bthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?'
' s& L; K2 M5 s0 S3 }0 O
8 z+ D8 ?8 J- L7 K  r" S0 T$ JThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
. y5 @0 ]# L( `- a. fpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the* Z* C7 X. f4 ?! X1 ^) Q
lawyer.
$ u% f- x* t* m; Y, t( v- r( J  ^& p2 f5 Q2 n2 l: K; {! p' f' [
Now, it's the newfie's turn.
: |( j) D0 B, h
3 m7 Z7 x: Z  {4 OHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
* @% g0 t% s8 Q8 l; S2 Mthree legs, and comes down with four?'
* c, r9 U4 e8 H) S( Q" Y+ P+ @0 }# r1 F6 t( [$ U* q* T
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all# u) ?$ A$ w: q3 [  C- b
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all! y6 w, Z, v/ h$ Q  {4 ]3 X0 M* Q5 o
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
6 t1 A7 @- m, z! Iof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
% s6 F- F! P& {8 p1 phands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right& _" @! ?% r& C2 L' b% T( `: S
back to sleep.
2 p; _/ L' K( O  ]. E* B) f  j! [; V: |' c
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
( _: ?8 y- g" `/ \; a* T* \( d- ywakes the newfie up and asks,
- J4 z8 Y! e5 N& C' k4 q* X( z! g3 }% g; b. ^1 ]* i9 L4 ~
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and( Z8 D# a  i: j- S: C' e3 ]
comes down with four?' 3 p3 Z8 p) T# Q5 N9 r
) |$ H6 d& m0 [" p- {
The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
8 A, w7 @  ^% @4 ~7 S8 u+ V' rand goes back to sleep.
: P2 W* _* Q' B! V
! J: A& _* I, J% Y0 a$ i. Q3 @
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!
/ y( y9 h  f# Y3 e
, U* F0 {$ S/ @0 o0 D2 B5 KLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the2 t' D1 t* r  s) K3 V9 n

9 c( }! i7 V3 k; x>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two " h  l8 O# M, y1 a3 b- ~$ J
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
* N3 O7 U0 E, ~5 h) K! H' V>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the 0 c' f9 M/ v7 Q2 b6 q; X
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, - M; z0 g, P% t0 g( X
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct3 @  u4 p' i) }- M) }

1 D3 ~& S# f, Q7 @>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research : S* A: O, ^3 w7 P! h8 h8 D
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
0 p/ g! R. Q% [, I>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
3 ]1 @; M! r5 p- `. x9 `8 W>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, + ?6 b, ~# W0 D1 l  Q
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
0 s% M& G/ o+ U$ y- e" P  j& V8 f% {# F" h7 H" t* Y8 I
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's / @6 E' R( {' y* V2 w/ M  o
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the ; Z1 Q: n: `# r7 P" O6 C5 Y
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
  r( V; I6 N$ J>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 ( w- o2 t4 O7 r3 B( x; R
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
$ Y! r9 |  h; ~4 |long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb3 V* n& ], g3 L8 x7 }) j. s
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if. i, z: _$ O1 I& `
the newfie would l ...
( k! I) T+ O) m' G4 I1 v0 n8 Y

- u  R0 j8 p* g4 b) V# R! m3 g" a3 d( H
' {/ Y7 O- p, T2 ~; u4 t% [好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
. Q/ Y7 t. @# Y( R2 \! u“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,: c  _& H+ B  C7 l% B
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
' B/ C. z! \- ~* C& Z8 H加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

+ w. Y* J' O4 w; a8 C- V真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表   G9 K# U( ?4 D$ _( D  g
# ]1 C8 t( L  s

& q0 n" @1 u; z2 j
( H% B: b' \+ T, ^1 P# r4 H# }2 B好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:& p8 c1 N! _6 E8 b. T5 w' R
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
+ {9 Z% R0 v5 I6 Q& e, J, _好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。

3 w% M4 `& Q  Y7 q3 b. w; f真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
( ]/ W4 _; F2 b& R3 n7 O
' P6 \/ a) ?" e真聪明,偶像啊

  \# t$ u4 B4 G  j- [1 P  y: Z' q: Q8 X% H9 ~- s
全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
7 ~# U) W! |# q0 Y
4 W' S) }: a( n4 D- o$ P$ B3 ^& U
9 m* L1 ?) ^8 c- D7 Q全盘接受一下。

/ z9 r9 u7 i3 Z: K真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表 7 E& E" |; X: y- U  z
) @2 k! p! y% X) x6 Q
真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

3 d! i/ V7 K$ n% R4 F  B8 R- Q# B7 _; Z/ {  B1 C/ M8 a( z

2 h- b9 M" W; m别把我往坏路上领啊。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表 ; [3 L: g- c. j# A
3 t, N3 y9 m6 l1 M2 Z
# |: S, A# A- ~8 W* t
& q) v8 B- ^& n2 Q
别把我往坏路上领啊。
( S0 s* p, S. D, r
你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 7 t5 t" x4 R3 l. ]' s4 D/ T# A
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

0 k' s+ Q2 F2 G/ L5 t8 I7 j" N# L多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
5 X7 m! A- K$ j/ C+ I' O; i6 j% Z$ [& h+ R/ r# x% I1 e6 r# ?
真博学,偶像啊。

. M/ ~5 z0 o) m大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 2 C5 Y; S8 p& R8 l; O5 l

( L% Q: }8 W( C" I大学教授哦,能不剥削?

* x7 t% w/ P/ g/ D5 K# y# ], T" w她是大学教瘦?
! r7 a" X* O' c# z& ~( N0 Y# M大学教胖还差不多 1 w  i/ V+ N0 T* h* h
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ; r; g0 X3 c+ h/ R/ T/ u. T; [
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

7 h  A  m# {9 y( Y- M2 M, @" ]说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 4 T- R% C, n2 f1 X: c3 e
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
) K  y9 b$ Q. ^, g

; i6 Z2 \" B$ t# ?& x# U+ Y哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-1-4 18:28 , Processed in 0.280262 second(s), 27 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表