 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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Why did God make mothers?# X/ ^6 N5 w% t. C
$ a; h1 f; M. S: U1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
0 k6 h" e( y h2. Mostly to clean the house.
, y! |9 N# z8 ?3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. % X7 A j5 w; T0 q
& D9 \, ^. f+ b2 C* w* F4 l- g# k7 dHow did God make mothers? 8 v. J4 ~; f7 A. U- w- O
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
/ d: w% x. x, }* b) T$ [2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
7 k3 y* d1 ?# m) @' T" x' h- F3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. 9 N: {/ p3 I$ d# p! J0 `. m& m
7 G, a! J/ ^( L3 F2 g0 G( B8 DWhat ingredients are mothers made of ?
6 f9 O7 v! e) n: p6 O" ]1 h0 n6 F1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. 6 m( S4 m" ^: g; A0 Q
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. ) ^) t- g1 X4 {; O5 H
" I( H: r7 z& d3 C6 t# ^( QWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom? . x) {1 x$ q! ~8 E5 q7 A$ Y8 g
1. We're related.* I. t% g" z" ]0 X7 |' W, a
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. " G( O0 y4 N: d( r: Z! w
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What kind of little girl was your mom?
. q. a/ s- p1 g2 {% g8 O4 X# w* N* Q1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. - B/ n" Y" A7 \
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. $ n" o8 @3 B" Y- ]$ ^
3. They say she used to be nice. ) H0 k5 ]' u6 B
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? % Q7 E3 I! U$ H% _. S( ^" @0 y9 t: n
1. His last name.7 y( n2 y' p* v6 x8 J8 j
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
v1 C! k- t% z3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? $ k* S4 l" @7 D
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Why did your mom marry your dad?
7 s6 P6 q; f, O% k6 Q6 V0 g6 Y+ g; ?1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. 9 {& f. F& S7 Z8 @9 P: p
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
8 w/ E m9 D' j/ G% y3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. . W3 X7 V- b; b% d7 G; d; d6 x/ G
7 ?5 Z7 a! a+ @9 P% G- g+ KWho's the boss at your house?
$ C) ^+ q" \; m( \' C" e3 i1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. * a* F; `' {2 q# }
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
4 ?0 p+ m A! |# k/ F3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. * k8 ?$ U. p$ J; n) Z4 Z
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What's the difference between moms & dads?
9 d! \ y2 A/ b) r" q1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
$ Q8 K8 p/ b" x K* h$ O2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.3 j+ Z6 x# s8 m9 b/ o9 a8 w7 X
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. # v5 ~% ?0 _9 ]0 q: h
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. 4 T z0 U$ i- {+ A. Z' E1 L+ l& W
; {% B. ^& I/ P; tWhat does your mom do in her spare time?
) `8 D( y. L& r0 ~1. Mothers don't do spare time.7 F/ f! q4 I9 `% @* C! p
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. - o( o& z% Y [3 W
- W7 b, T) P0 t6 `1 C* H& BWhat would it take to make your mom perfect?
& h( z0 g& T' Q; u% i5 x' b" a1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.8 Z0 Q9 a) V9 B
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. ' S! I$ H* l% @9 Z/ w; n* e
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? * {, u( i0 t3 T' k0 a
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
7 M1 _* x; _0 y3 N" s. K! f, T8 t# ?2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.9 A1 k! |3 \" z0 z% e! c5 a
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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