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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
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* d- d0 k) X% l) Z# {% D6 y. E1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. 7 V+ E' J( ^5 X2 ` ~
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown. ( v! K; U5 ^* B( g
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. 9 m( b8 U/ p' }+ U, S) H
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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1. Big rock between you and B.C.
2 L# Q6 v8 S: \: z* i8 t2. Ottawa who?
, D$ [2 n8 L3 B8 e3 ?6 \3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. , u; c* U* s; }# K4 C
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
Y- ]* t _/ ~3 U5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
6 f5 q5 Y W! E6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. % w7 n4 d6 j6 v
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) w. l8 ^0 C# C3 N# DTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN 5 V( m. c+ A( p/ I- n; b6 B
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1. You never run out of wheat.
( d4 O6 T5 k2 B3 `4 F$ Q0 l+ \2. Your province is really easy to draw.
4 F; v& A9 f9 F- x3 T3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. 0 q9 P8 K1 C6 o; W' A6 H5 ]
4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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, A, r; J4 V) [5 `TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA 3 g2 G- B2 _; [/ s! _0 \
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
$ A9 F: q, T+ G6 e/ H2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
# t) Y7 E: P9 G4 q* f1 k3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
: C% V5 I5 w# [4 Q5 ~, S: E4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. . R6 S! B" |" F1 m$ N1 e
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by. * Y/ s# r- U9 j
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$ r. C% k: P9 eTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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1. You live in the centre of the universe.
% h+ C7 z, K7 S; r4 `' [2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. + w- Q3 c/ @7 T9 a& {
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. " N6 B# e- _; W) \5 {
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. ( B* g$ }+ D; b
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC - ?- R$ X* E/ I7 `
# A4 Q! A; L% p& b2 w7 Y. T1. Racism is socially acceptable
, E. {" w0 Y% M2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
, \/ _3 u# D: q; {5 W$ |3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
# r5 ^2 T; y& m+ T0 K8 T5 M4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
+ c; A# T4 ]! j* `/ x9 lTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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4 ~$ j# u: r2 x) j, zTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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' r k& k- p3 k7 r1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
! [4 G! M- B* u) i2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. * d) T y! m8 v1 M2 p2 x, {$ D
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick / N8 F: V K1 @0 G9 K' u! ?
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. 3 \9 _2 Z$ G: J; S' A$ `: G) r" B
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* e' ]8 j! e8 uTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA # ^* o" G+ R& v* R( u; Q, E
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1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can. / s9 Z7 z" L% @& W" y3 ~
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
& v9 s* R4 k4 b6 k6 I3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. 6 h7 x, J5 X. n9 A
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND 8 }$ ]$ e c7 L. {9 W* {5 W
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
" p% Z8 Q* e/ Z P: y" z2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. ; V% Z9 }1 v: d0 E$ x8 _* Q* @
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. ) V7 Y2 r1 {, M; y0 x
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
( F0 X5 k/ ^4 x5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
/ a6 J' k S4 x4 s/ d4 r" O1 A6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. ' I1 {9 {; {5 c" y. n
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND ; g; w& F) @) a
/ d0 S) T/ t1 V; W# ? }+ a1 M1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. + d: k$ c3 ]! f9 J
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
9 p- M# s% _1 x4 n- f! |3. The workday is about two hours long.
, k% N" ~: q, b# _4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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