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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
+ e3 U5 u! X( s1 v; \+ d2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown. ' @2 ?$ r% N) M6 d7 w( Y, ]
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. . G/ T/ r% t! w
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
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5 Z) Y! y7 n% \- xTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA $ G9 m# s' E7 J
+ d0 Z9 {8 \( S: j# [( p1. Big rock between you and B.C. ; e [# W, h5 y, ~" X
2. Ottawa who?
) |6 d4 j" N3 ^8 ~3 P+ e* r3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. Y. V1 E$ w# |0 N3 n
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. 4 x/ A1 `7 v" v1 h8 z- T
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. + J7 J c7 x: F8 F" z8 v
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN % A8 E" j8 v1 Y! d8 k7 l
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1. You never run out of wheat. 8 u2 P' O b8 Z: J; ~7 F
2. Your province is really easy to draw. " Z9 _- e; N% m0 p% R6 m2 X/ s
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
9 S- g! s% L; K1 z, }4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA 1 E- ]% {* U; x; s! l; ?
5 a: ~/ e' _/ U' ~1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. _3 D' N% A( W7 _4 `2 v% K/ u
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. 1 Q' c7 H% w8 O. n3 {. a
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. : {6 D! h! D; g3 z+ g
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. 5 m7 {' x: Z% H9 K7 v6 r$ P
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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6 [0 f: O6 l1 { s/ W1 ZTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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1. You live in the centre of the universe. & w% s1 U4 M4 g0 Y: c* f0 _% q! L4 j
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
; ]1 q( \" r: E: d+ W3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
- Q3 n. \# K( J' P! c) P4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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& M" n! a' A( I- y- `TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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1. Racism is socially acceptable ! n% V ~3 K2 m* w
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
' m2 S9 f& w+ k7 N3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
) U W; N2 f4 J7 w5 ~: ~" }8 a+ ^4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *( G' G/ A+ c! Z' `7 f/ s
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK 8 q( @; Q! o/ r3 z
9 k6 _" g0 `2 h3 gTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK - B* i, K2 o( H; Q. e
. e9 z& s/ T% h7 O1 q9 s1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. 3 a `/ f3 X5 y# O! v) O; B
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
* y9 E6 o" m7 S9 N' `3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick 7 w, ^6 \$ v8 O- w
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. ( Z# V0 \: |, a8 u; Y
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% K, |/ d$ j0 X' Z, N3 cTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA ; r s' Z, K [( p# {
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1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
% |! _# }% {! u3 M$ s' l! P) i2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. : m4 a3 b o6 Y o/ u
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
- c2 U, O" Z9 {# O0 G3 \0 }: @, g2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. 7 `* C0 Q+ X2 |8 c: A3 c- _; z& Z
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
6 S3 n* z$ r1 z4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." - B7 j; l6 T5 a9 B( b
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
: i+ b% N' V& i2 B$ H0 o6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND 0 P8 [( m% f8 S. O
0 [( N# P- q3 I8 J8 x# W9 H, x1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. ' z% f- [/ e8 g0 \- ?. J
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. 8 U5 z/ k- E# z" H: v" [1 ]4 V7 B
3. The workday is about two hours long. ; ~3 p1 I$ |6 L# ]# V3 N- B
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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